In case no one noticed I have changed my pen name from Fangalla Marie to Fangalla Marie and Eppy the House Elf. So everyone will have to re-bookmark me in your computers so you can find me easier. Don't look at me like that, Eppy made me do it. I think she's taking over.
Chapter Eighteen
Harry wonders around not really sure where he is. He knows he's in a very old Muggle village, but there are no people around he can see, which really is good considering he stark raving naked and doesn't want anyone to see him that way. Harry didn't really want to be arrested for public indecency. I mean really how would that look on the front page of his own newspaper; HARRY POTTER WALKING AROUND MUGGLES SHOWING THEM HIS BUSINESS. Not an attractive idea to start the day with, a bunch of photographers taking his picture while Rita Skeeter asked him how it felt to have his enormous pee pee swinging free.
However, on the flip side of that argument, it never once did it occur to him to enter someone's home and find a pair of trousers to cover himself with. Even though he was a little shy about having his pee pee swinging free, which it did, like a horse's tail. Swinging back and forth, to and fro, whatever that means.
"Where am I?" he asks and not getting a response. Who was there to answer? Hello, we've established that the village was empty. Harry keeps on walking until he comes upon a small park area with green grass and the sun is shining warmly on it and it felt very nice to have the sunlight on his bare skin. He was thoroughly enjoying having this Neil moment.
In the park Harry notices something moving behind a clump of trees and is instantly curious and wants to investigate. In fact his curiosity is so strong that he completely forgets that he is naked. So skirting around the trees, the Boy-Who-Lived soon discovers two people, a man and a woman, both of whom are also completely naked and very much enjoying each other's company if you know what I mean. Harry blushes from embarrassment, but somehow finds that he can't look away. The man, who is standing behind the woman, has thick black messy hair on his head, broad muscular shoulders and strong well muscled arms, while the woman is leaning over the picnic table while her long red hair fly around her head, obviously in fits of ecstasy.
"Dad?" Harry mumbles quietly to himself as he realized who this man might be. "Mum?" Then Harry forces himself to look away, he couldn't look at that. It didn't matter what he had experienced in life, no seventeen year old boy wants to think about his mother doing that, let alone enjoying her self while doing it.
"Nope, I'm afraid you've got it wrong," the man said as he … well let's just say he was performing a repetitive action with his hips and leave it at that, shall we? "I'm not dad, I'm you Harry."
"What?" Harry asked bewildered. "But that's mum you're with… I'm with… we're with."
Laughing the more muscular and macho version of Harry says, "No, it's not Mum. What do you take me for?" Then grabbing hold of her hair, and without missing a thrust, pulls the girl up so that her face can be seen in the sunlight.
"Ginny," Harry breathes as he watched her smooth creamy skin glisten in the sunshine. Watched as her breasts bobbed up and down in rhythm with … well I think you can figure out what that is.
"That's right Harry," said his double as he … well I think at this point we know what he's doing to her, so I'll stop mentioning it. "This is what your life would have been like if you'd stayed in school last year."
"I'd have a tattoo of a Hungarian Horntail across my hairy chest? I don't have a hairy chest."
Smirking, his double said, "Well, not that part. I'm just the representation of what you think you're ideal body image should be, deep, deep down."
"You're that beast in my stomach aren't you?"
"Yep. Well one of them anyway. I'm the one that's in love with Ginny."
"I'm in love with Ginny?" asked Harry. Was he in love with Ginny?
"Well, you were falling in love with her before you were arrested and sent to Azkaban for murdering Hagrid, Professor Trelawney, Percy Weasley, several house elves and that large three headed dog, Fluffy," his double explained, as he … well you know.
"And now?"
"Need you really ask?" his macho double replied. "You were the one watching her supple breasts as she emerged from that bathtub tonight. I know you felt that fire ignite in your belly as we watched her."
Watching the two of them, Harry felt his double had a point.
"Unlike like them," his double said and nodded towards another small group of trees.
Taking a deep breath before he turned, Harry fully expected to see him and Seamus doing the same thing that his double was doing with Ginny. However, he was wrong and the site he found was nothing what could have imagined, which was two fully dressed six or seven year-old boys playing monster trucks in the sand pile.
"What the?" Harry muttered as he walked closer to the two boys. One of which was a scrawny boy with round glasses and a lightning bold scar on his forehead and the other was a sandy haired boy with the devil in his grin. Harry watched the child version of himself playing with the child version of Seamus Finnigan.
"Hiya Harry," his child version looked up and said to him.
Instinctively Harry tried to cover his … nakedness, but let's face it; nothing short of a five foot two by eight was going to hide that thing. "Um, hi."
Smiling the boy said as he pointed to the other two, "You don't have to be embarrassed. I've already seen them going at it all night."
"Um, yeah. I was kind of wondering why you and Seamus aren't doing the same thing."
"Why do you think?" the child Harry asked.
"I don't know really," Harry admitted.
"Because you don't see Ginny and Seamus the same way."
"Well that's just brilliant," Harry said sarcastically. "I'm standing here naked and you tell me that I see them differently."
"Seamus gave you permission to be weak and then took care of you."
"What?" Harry asked rather stunned. This was not something a little kid should understand.
"It's perfectly natural for you to think of Seamus as an equal and Ginny as a sex object."
Harry gawked still stunned.
"You better shut your mouth before a fly goes in," giggled the little boy.
Harry shut his mouth, but still didn't speak.
Helping him out, the boy says, "Look at them over there being all sweaty and nasty. Tell me what you see in yourself."
Harry looked and truly thought about it. "He's … I'm strong. I'm in charge and I hope I'm pleasing her. I feel sexy thinking about it. Like a man should be."
"And when you look at us in the sand?"
Harry looked back at the two boys with their monster trucks and strange sound effects coming from Seamus' mouth as he toppled over a sand mountain.
"Safe. Warm. Childhood… the one I never got to have," Harry said and finished quietly looking sad. Then looking the boy in his eye Harry asks, "Am I going crazy? Do I have multiple personalities in my head with you and him?"
"Um, I don't think so."
"Thank Merlin, I thought I was having an EmySabath moment."
"Who?"
"Never mind," Harry said dismissively. "So what happens now?"
The boy Harry smiled and said, "You wake up."
x-x-x-x-x
Harry suddenly bolted upright in his bed. He was panting and sweating like he had just run a marathon and he was out of breath. This had to be the strangest dream he'd had since returning to the castle.
Flinging back the covers, Harry scrambled out of bed. It was the middle of the night and everyone was still asleep. The Aurors and Weasleys had left several hours ago and Harry had went to bed shortly after that kiss Seamus had given him in the common room.
Not wanting to think about that again, Harry pulls on a sweatshirt and removing his lounge pants, puts on a pair of sweatpants and heavy wool socks and quietly leaves the dorm room and went down the stairs to the common room.
"Harry Potter is you's being alright?" asked Dobby, who was sitting at one of the work tables with Eppy working on something that Harry barely bothered to notice.
"Yeah," Harry said as he ran his hand through his hair and took a seat in front of the now cold fireplace.
Getting up quickly, Dobby rushes over and restarts the fire for him as Eppy gathered up their project and hid it away.
"Thanks," says Harry as he begins to stare into the flames.
The two elves looked at each other with some concern. They had no idea where this sullen and moody Harry Potter had come from.
x-x-x-x-x
"Harry? Are you down here?"
Harry continued to stare into the dying embers of the fire and didn't answer.
Seamus walked up to the chair Harry was sitting in wearing nothing but a pair of lounge pants that are hung low on his masculine hips. Okay, that was for Eppy, so live with it. "Harry mate, are you alright?"
"I don't know."
Looking concerned, Seamus takes a seat in another chair and asks, "Did you have another nightmare?"
"Yes … No … I'm not sure."
"You want to talk about it?"
"Yes … No … I'm not sure."
"Okay, as long as you're sure about it," Seamus said with a grin.
Harry threw Seamus a disgusted look and said, "I think I'm mad at you."
"Yeah, I kind of figured that mate. I'm sorry I kissed you tonight, but …" Seamus paused, not knowing how to continue without digging his arse in deeper.
"You took away my anger. I needed it and I want it back."
"What?"
"You heard me," Harry said quietly.
Seamus sighed. Where did that come from? "Harry you don't need to be angry all the time."
"Don't tell me what I need," spat Harry. "It doesn't matter if I needed it or not, I WANT it. I have to get back at them for hurting me and I need it back to do it."
"That's not who you are Harry. You're not an angry person; you've always been a person who lets his heart guide him. You forgave me when I was being a right little berk to you in our fifth year. You are a good person Harry."
Jumping to his feet, Harry begins pacing around and yelling, "HOW CAN YOU KNOW WHO I AM? I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO THE BLOODY HELL I AM ANYMORE!"
Seamus slumped back in his chair and Eppy, who had been listening, hid under a table.
"THE DURSLEYS TREATED ME WORSE THAN A SLAVE!" Harry ranted. "THEN I FOUND OUT I WAS A WIZARD AND EVERYONE TREATED ME LIKE THEIR MESSIAH AND THEN I CAME TO SCHOOL AND EVERY YEAR I WENT FROM BEING A HERO TO BEING THE VILLIAN DEPENDING ON WHAT THEY WANTED TO BELIEVE EACH YEAR."
Harry paused and continued, "Then Hagrid was killed and no one believed me that I didn't do it. Dumbledore knew I didn't do it and still I was sent to Azkaban for one year, three months, two weeks, four days, seven hours, thirteen minutes and twenty six seconds. Who would have thought I killed Hagrid. He came and took me away from the Dursleys and into the wizarding world."
Falling back into his chair, Harry still went on, "He was my first friend … ever … and he had a heart bigger than the forbidden forest. They didn't even look for his killer, just threw me away and I need my anger to fight them, to punish them." Harry seemed to slump into himself and whispered, "Why did you take my anger away?"
"I didn't take anything away from you mate," Seamus said as he slipped out his chair and moved over to Harry. "You let it go, when your heart didn't need it anymore."
"I still need it."
"Why do you need your anger Harry?"
"So I won't be weak."
"You've never been weak Harry. You've always been strong."
"No I've not."
To Be Continued … Please Read and Review
For those of you that are confused why Harry has so far only put Dumbledore, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger and Molly Weasley in Ministry custody. Well there are others that have done Harry the dirty, but they for some reason (hint, hint, hint) do NOT work at Hogwarts and by the end of Chapter 37, that's where Harry still is. Now repeat after me, FANGALLA HAS A PLAN! Eppy knows about the plan and is currently wringing her hands and giggling in a very Mister Burns kind of way. I am soooooo frightened!
Neil wrote a trilogy of stories with the first one called Hogwarts Exposed, which can be found at both scnoogle dot com and on his yahoo group site. In these stories, which are loosely based on Barb's Psychic Serpent trilogy, Harry marries Hermione and they become nudists as are their adopted children. Though I have not asked his permission to reference him, I cannot see him refusing. However, I am NOT recommending them for reading as I didn't read all three stories.
EmySabath wrote a story called Me, Myself and I in which Harry said about twelve different personalities in his head. That story is located a ff dot net for those interested and I really enjoyed reading that story.