"CLEAR"

Bucky cried harder against Steve's shoulder, a solitary tear fell from Steve's eye as he looked over at Loki and Sam both trying to keep their emotion's in check as Tony opened the door to Liv's room...

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

Bucky hadn't left his room in weeks, everyone tried, everyone failed, Bucky could tolerate in his room was Steve, Sam and Loki, each checked on him through the day, making sure he was eating showering, they knew he wasn't sleeping, he tried but each attempt ended up waking either Steve or Loki who would come running to his room, each time he tried to sleep without her the nightmares got worse, Tony had tried to speak with him but Bucky couldn't face him without breaking down, Tony was trying to be strong for pepper and for Morgan, Bucky tried, but he couldn't be strong, not without her.

the sun rise glaring through his window, alerting Bucky that another new day had started, another sun rise he would watch without her, tears pooled in his eyes falling freely down his face, Bucky felt his heart break into a million tiny pieces each time he watched the sun rise and fall, each time he looked out at the stars each day starting and ending without her.

"James.." Bucky turned to Loki, dressed in his pristine black suit hair combed back, looking every inch a prince, a sad smiled graced Loki's face as he looked at his friend "how are you feeling today?"

"Oh great!" Bucky snipped still looking out the window, Loki smiled though it didn't reach his eyes "You don't need to keep checking up on me you know" Bucky signed turning to look at Loki

"I know my friend, but it seems my feet carry me here without any direction" Loki stated crossing his arms over his chest

"I see" Bucky stated "you can leave now, I'm not going anywhere, I'll still be here when you come back" Bucky muttered turning back to the window

"Very well, I will see you soon my friend" Loki said as he turned to leave "I do know that Stark is bringing the little one, you might want to make yourself presentable, she has been quite insistent on seeing you"

Bucky shook his head as the door closed softly behind Loki, Bucky walked over to the door and locked it, he would not be seeing Tony or Morgan, or anyone else today, he didn't want to look at Morgan when she looked so much like her sister, a new wave of tears made their way down Bucky's face, how could he face them after what happened, he couldn't keep himself from falling apart when he was by himself, how could he look at her family and keep it together?

Bucky stood from the bed, looking round the room, falling to his knees Bucky screamed, grabbing his face as the pain tore through him, picking up the coffee table he threw it at the wall, feeling slightly better watching it shatter, shards of glass covering the floor, Bucky grabbed the small black mug from his dresser, throwing this aswell, grinning as it smashed as it connected to the concreate

Steve walked down the hall towards the lounge when he walked past Bucky's room, he could hear things crashing, glass breaking, Steve's eyes widened running to the door he tried to open it, realising it was locked he banged the side of his fist on the door "BUCKY! WHAT'S GOING ON IN THERE" Steve waited for a minute with no answer, he tried shouting again and nothing, Steve looked at the door before lifting his leg and kicking the door, one, two, three times and the door swung open, Bucky sat in the middle of the floor, the room around his covered in broken glass and wood, Steve rushed to his friends side, placing a hand on his back "Bucky...what happened?"

Bucky looked up at Steve, taking in the worried expression Bucky put his head in his hands "I can't do it anymore Steve"

"I know Buck" Steve signed " I know"

"How am I supposed to be around everyone and pretend everything is fine?" Bucky asked looking up at Steve

"Bucky...no one is expecting you to be fine" Steve stated "your not expected to act a certain way or be a certain way"

Bucky nodded looking round the room "Jeez, I really made a mess huh?"

"Yep" Steve stated, Bucky looked up at him and smiled slightly

"Come on, i'll help you clean up, pretty sure I can arrange replacement furniture before the end of the day" Steve smiled, Bucky nodded his head, standing he started to pick up the shards of glass cover the floor just as Loki walked back in

"Gods! What happened in here?" Loki asked as he took in the mess

"I did" Bucky shrugged "It made me feel better"

"James..."Loki signed and then waved his hand, Bucky watched as all his furniture and belongings started to piece themselves back together and go back to their usual spots "There" Loki grinned "much better"

"thanks" Bucky smiled slightly sitting on the edge of his bed feeling a fresh wave of tears coming forwards, feeling the lump in the back of his throat, Steve patted his back softly

"Come one Bucky, Morgan would really love to see you" Steve smiled Bucky nodded "Loki and me will stay with you"

"Let me clean myself up first" Bucky muttered walking into the bathroom, he turned on the shower, pulling off his clothes he stepped into the burning hot shower, groaning softly as it collided with his skin, Bucky took his time as he stood under the burning hot water, steam filled the room.

stepping out and pulling on clean clothes he walked out to his room, Steve and Loki still there waiting for him just as they promised.

Steve gave his shoulder a squeeze as they walked out the room and down the corridor towards the stairs, dread filled Bucky's senses before settling in the pit of his stomach

"Bucky!" Morgan squealed running towards him, Bucky caught her mid stride and picked her up, wrapping her arms tightly round his neck "You've been gone for ages" Morgan scolded.

"I know" Bucky smiled "Can you forgive me"

Morgan thought about it for a second before nodding her head and grinning at Bucky, Bucky grinned back as they walked into the room trying hard to prevent the tears falling, Steve noticed the change in Bucky and took Morgan from him

"It's okay James. you can go" Loki whispered

Bucky nodded and walked further into the room Tony was currently occupying the only chair in the room, Bucky stood against the back wall looking directly in front of him

"Barns" Tony smiled,

"Stark" Bucky nodded, putting his hands in his pockets "How is she?"

"No change" Tony muttered leaning forward and taking her hand, stroking his thumb across the back of her hand "how are you doing?"

Bucky shrugged eyes trained on the wall in front of him "yeah...me too" Tony laughed "you can come closer you know"

Bucky nodded and walked forward, eyes still trained on the bland white wall as his knees hit the metal bed frame causing him look down, tears fell freely down his face as he looked at Liv,

"She was asking for you today" Tony muttered

"Tony i'm sorry, i just I don't know how to face her, I thought she died" Bucky whispered

"I know, and Liv understands, she just misses you" Tony stated patting Bucky's back "sit with her for a while, she's out for the night"

Bucky looked at Tony and nodded, taking the now empty seat at Liv's bed side, taking her hand and kissing the back of it softly.