A very long chapter, because I'm so nice... and also I couldn't find a good stopping place g> Hope you enjoy, let me know what you think! WARNING: SMUT - Heather x

'You're the best!' I squealed, throwing my arms around him.

Ranger shook his head slightly, 'not quite, Babe.'

I met his eyes, 'You are to me.' I said simply.

Chapter 13

Ranger's cousin and his father were watching us with smiles on their faces; I guess those two hundred watt smiles are a Manoso specialty.

'Ranger?' I said.

'Yo?'

'Introductions?'

'Oh, sorry. Babe, this is my father, Carlos Manoso, and my cousin, Federico Manoso. Papa, Ricky, this is Stephanie Plum.'

'Nice to meet you Miss Plum.' Carlos and Ricky said simultaneously.

'It's a pleasure.' I replied, latent Burg manners kicking in.

Carlos's smile widened, 'The last time I saw Ranger rolling around the floor with a girl was when he was fifteen.'

Ricky snorted, 'yeah, after that he started rolling around at their houses.'

'Either it's my imagination,' I said, 'or you're blushing Ranger.'

'Imagination.' He said shortly.

I smiled, 'I'm sure.' My smile faded slightly, 'I know I interrupted earlier, if you want to carry on talking about whatever then I can go into another room or something.'

'Not necessary.' Ranger said. 'My brother is a lawyer, he's working a murder case: he's defending the accused. The guy's girlfriend was killed and he swears he didn't do it. He's given a description of the guy he thinks did it. My father, my uncle and my cousin run a private investigating firm together. Papa and Ricky are following up a lead down here, My uncle, Ricardo, and some others are following up some leads in Miami. Rangeman has been contracted to help the search.'

'That's the most I've ever heard you say!' I said, awed.

'It was a one off.' Ranger responded, lips twitching.

'So I shouldn't get used to it, huh?'

'No.'

Ricky grinned, 'his taciturn nature isn't that surprising, the Manoso Clan is huge, honestly, it's usually hard to get a word in edgeways.'

'That's my excuse, and I'm sticking to it.' Ranger said.

I laughed and relaxed fully against Ranger again and he smiled, 'proud of you Babe.'

'For what?' I asked.

Ranger's hand snaked between us and he pulled my gun out of my waistband, 'You're carrying your gun.' He flicked open the chamber and his smile widened, 'and it's loaded.'

'I'm breaking the law, and you're proud of me?'

'Morally right, legally not-so-right.' He paused, 'how are you rationalising it?' he asked.

'I figure it's not exactly a breakage of the law; it's more like a fracture. And I'm working for the law, so the law should maybe let it slide. Besides for bad-ass bounty hunters like us, the law's more like guidelines rather than actual rules, right?'

I was getting two hundred watt grins from all three of them – 600 watts; I'm lucky I'm not electrocuted.

'Right.' Ranger agreed, I could feel his muscular chest vibrate with silent laughter, but his face was merely amused; looking at him you'd have no idea he was silently having hysterics.

'Huh. How often do you silently laugh around me?'

His smile widened, but he didn't answer.

I rolled my eyes, and he laughed out loud.

Ranger's cell rang and he answered it with a grimace and his customary 'Yo.' The conversation was predictably short.

'Gotta go.' Ranger said, 'my skip's at Joey's, if I don't get him today, Vinnie forfeits the bond. Hector's going to be on bodyguard duty.'

'Ok, not that I'm complaining or anything; but doesn't Hector just do alarms and security systems rather than the being in the wind stuff?'

'Hector can be in the wind too. He's multitalented.'

'That's cool.' I grinned suddenly, 'do you know who I think of every time you say 'be in the wind'?'

'No, who?'

'Mary Poppins; she used to be in the wind too. With her umbrella.' I paused thoughtfully, 'I wish I had an umbrella like that.'

Ricky cracked up, and Carlos looked like he was almost giving himself a hernia trying not to laugh.

Ranger looked at me for a long minute, 'I can't say that ever again now.'

'I'm sure you'll think up something suitably tough to say instead.'

It was Ranger's turn to pause thoughtfully, 'How about 'I'll be gone like smoke'?'

'That could work,' I agreed, smiling.

'No weird connotations?'

'Nope. Not yet, but give me time.'

Ranger gave me a quick kiss on the forehead and was gone like smoke.

Yup, it worked.

Thankfully, Hector appeared soon after, preventing me from interrogating Ranger's relatives. I wanted to know about Ranger, but I wanted to hear it from Ranger, not his family. But, like Christ, I was tempted.

I figured that comparing myself to Christ was a bit disrespectful, not to mention inaccurate. So I mentally genuflected to God and begged his forgiveness for my momentary irreverence. I wasn't struck down; so I guess all was forgiven.

Hector and I excused ourselves and then we were off to haul criminals back to the pokey. At least that was the plan. But I think I've already mentioned that plans don't tend to go so well around me.

Which is why I'm covered in flour. And because Murphy hates me, Hector doesn't have one speck of flour on him.

I'm jealous.

Hector and I got on surprisingly well, and the conversation flowed between us. At some point during our day we started teaching each other; I absent-mindedly corrected his grammar whilst he taught me little Spanish phrases.

Hola, que tal? Bien, y tu? Muy bien, gracias Senor.

That translated as; Hello, how are you? Good, and you? Very good, thank you Sir.

Cool, huh?

It was nearly 9pm when we decided to call it a day and head back to my apartment. I unlocked the door and Hector re-locked it after him.

'Was Ranger serious?' I asked.

'About what?'

'Bath duty.'

Hector smirked, 'Yes.'

I looked down at myself, covered in flour, and I sighed. I really needed that bath. I ran the bath and peeled out of my dirty clothes, putting them in a plastic bag. I eased into the hot bath.

Even though I knew Hector was gay, I still found it…unsettling to have a man - who I didn't even know very well - watch me bathe.

I spent the first five minutes doing nothing but blushing. Eventually I just took a deep breath and told myself to get on with it. Hector put the toilet cover down and sat - watching interestedly as I shaved my legs.

'If you weren't gay this would be even more awkward.' I commented.

Hector regarded me quizzically, 'who said I was gay?'

My heart stopped. 'Ranger and Lester – you are gay, right?'

'I'm bisexual.'

'WHAT?' I thrashed around in the bath, trying to cover myself up, I flung an arm across my breasts and my other hand covered between my legs.

Talk about locking the gate after the horse has bolted.

Hector burst into laughter, he fell off the toilet he'd been precariously perched on, and collapsed on the floor, laughing.

'Joking.' He gasped, 'I'm gay.'

I'm furious.

I picked up the wet face cloth and threw it into his face, and then I splashed him - a lot. By the time I was done he looked rather bedraggled. And a teensy bit annoyed.

Oops. Remember the teardrop Stephanie? He has a gang kill. Be nice to the gang killer. Although, if Sally Sweet tattooed on his deserved teardrops he'd look like he was crying hysterically, and I wasn't scared of Sally, so…

I met Hectors annoyed gaze full on, he held my eyes for half a minute and I began to feel nervous, but then a huge smile crossed his face and he nodded approval.

'Good bone in your back.' He said.

'Good backbone.' I corrected.

Hector grinned, 'yes,' he nodded, 'spunky.'

'Gracias, now can I get out of the bath? I'm going pruney.' I held out my hand so he could see.

I got out and got dressed in my jammies; today it was tiny cotton hot pants and a strap top. What? It's comfy.

So what if Ranger might drop by? That didn't affect my choice of jammies, nuh uh.

I plopped down on the couch and turned on the TV, Hector had ordered Pizza whilst I was getting dressed, and it arrived half way through 'CSI: NY'. We ate companionably, though we both put our pizza aside for a few minutes whilst the CSI team pulled a man's half mangled body out of a burger making machine – that kinda thing makes you lose your appetite a little.

I went to the bathroom and picked up my moisturiser and carried it back to the couch. I popped the cap and poured some lotion into my hand. I started to rub it into my right calf. I froze when the locks started to tumble open, and Hector drew his gun.

It was Ranger.

Hector put his gun away again.

Ranger walked over to us and raised an eyebrow at Hector's dishevelled state.

'There was incident in bathroom.' Hector explained, grinning at me.

'There was an incident in the bathroom.' I corrected, feeling snooty.

Hector grinned and nodded graciously, 'Si.'

'I'm on bodyguard duty.' Said Ranger.

'Si.' Nodded Hector. He got up and ruffled my hair, 'adios guapa.'

'What?' I asked.

'Goodbye beautiful.' Ranger translated softly.

'Oh. Gracias Hector. Adios.'

Hector winked at me and let himself out.

'The bath incident?' Ranger asked.

'He told me he was bisexual…when I was in the bath. I splashed him.' I shrugged, like it was a normal everyday occurrence.

Ranger grinned, 'you only splashed him?'

'He does have the teardrop.' I pointed out.

Ranger's grin widened, 'true.'

CSI ended and we settled in to watch Law and Order. Half way through Law and Order, I remembered that I needed to finish moisturising my legs. I put my foot up on my new coffee table and started to work the cream into my left calf. Then I did my thighs, and then I moisturised my hands. I put the cap back on the bottle and put it down.

Ranger was looking at me with dark black eyes.

'What?'

'Babe.' He said hoarsely. Then he reached out and trailed a hand lightly down my soft smooth leg. He swallowed hard.

He took a deep steadying breath, 'we should go to bed Babe.'

I knew he meant it platonically – he's on guard duty after all. But I couldn't resist teasing him, 'Don't you think that's a bit forward?' I said, eyelashes fluttering.

'No.' Ranger replied, 'but this is,' and his hand curled around my neck, pulling me to him. His firm lips pressed against mine, and my lips willingly, and almost automatically, parted. His hot tongue slid into my mouth, stroking firmly against mine. His tongue explored me, running along the edge of my teeth and the roof of my mouth before returning its attention back to my tongue. He teased my tongue softly now, and I felt a spurt of wetness between my legs. His tongue retreated, drawing me into his mouth. It was my turn to explore.

I was straddling him, and I could feel Ranger's enjoyment of our kiss. I ground my hips against him and he groaned into my mouth. His hands caressed my thighs, stroking up and down. One of his hands stroked between my legs and we both moaned: me, because of his touch, and him, because of the dampness of my hot pants.

Ranger's cell rang shrilly, and in that moment, I really hated technology.

Ranger pulled away from me, and his hand between my legs stilled.

'Yo.' He said, still sounding out of breath. Ranger swore, then muttered, 'fine.' Followed by, 'Fuck you.' Then he hung up.

I raised an eyebrow.

'It was Tank.'

'And?'

'He was just driving by.'

'And?'

'And he has binoculars with him.'

I glanced towards my window; the curtains were open, 'oh.'

'Yeah. He's coming up here to bodyguard whilst I take a very, very cold shower.'

Uh oh, Tank was going to come up here. Suddenly I wished I was wearing a bra with my strap top, my nipples were firmly standing to attention, and Tank would see.

'Yeah.' Said Ranger huskily, 'but I got to see too.'

I blushed furiously, mentally cursing Esp, and Ranger laughed softly, 'Tank'll be here in fifty seconds, but in the meantime, he's not watching.' Ranger got up and closed the curtains, 'and nor is anyone else.' He turned to me, 'I'll behave myself later,' he promised, 'but for now…'

Ranger closed the distance between us; his hands slipped the thin straps of my top off my shoulders, pulling my top down enough to reveal my breasts.

'Babe.' He said appreciatively. Then he cupped my breasts in his hands, kneading them gently, and then he gave me a bone-melting kiss. He pulled back and lowered his head to my chest, drawing his wet tongue between my breasts and then around, until his hot mouth encircled my nipple and sucked. His hand was stroking my other breast, rolling my nipple expertly between his fingertips.

The locks started to tumble. Ranger swore, quickly putting my straps back and pulling my top back up. He pushed me onto the couch, and we sat there, chests heaving, trying to look normal. 'I'll dream of that later.' Ranger whispered into my ear, and I couldn't suppress a shiver of desire. Before I could reply, Tank was there.

'Out.' He said firmly to Ranger, pointing to the bathroom – much like you would with a dog that had misbehaved.

Ranger rose from the couch with liquid grace and made his way to the bathroom. I watched; my head tilted to the side. What? He has a great ass!

Tank was smiling at me.

'What?' I said, a tad defensively.

His smile widened, and his gaze slowly dragged down my body and then back again, and raised an eyebrow.

I felt my face heat up. He wasn't looking at me sexually, though there was some of that thrown in, but mostly he was looking amused. Very amused. I hugged a pillow to my chest, so my state wasn't quite so obvious. Tank smiled even more. I threw the pillow at his head.

He ducked.

Why does everyone apart from me duck?

Because I'm a dope, that's why.

Eventually Ranger returned, his wet hair was down, his shirt was off, and he looked very relaxed.

'Cold shower my ass.' I muttered aloud. Oops, I meant to keep that comment to myself.

Ranger smiled sexily, 'yeah, I went with the other option.'

I could picture it: the water streaming down his muscular mocha body, his wet hair framing his face, one hand supporting his weight on the shower wall as the other hand moved up and down on his…OMG!

I realized I was staring fixedly at Ranger's crotch. I jerked my eyes up; Ranger was grinning all two hundred watts. Tank shook his head, 'Out.' He said to me, pointing to the bathroom.

So I went into the shower too. Somehow the shower massager turned itself on, I don't know how these things happen, probably I should take it to a store to get it fixed. Uh huh.

I climbed out of the shower, my limbs feeling a bit shakier than before, but I felt a lot better. I got dressed in a different pair of hot pants and a top, and headed back out.

Ranger grinned when he looked at me, 'feeling better Babe? You look more…relaxed.'

'A good shower is very relaxing.' I informed the men blandly.

Tank shook his head again. 'You're a pair.' He said, gesturing to us. 'Now, can you keep your hands and tongues to yourselves, or do I need to chaperone?'

'We'll behave.' Ranger promised.

'Good. Lock up after me and set the motion detectors.'

Ranger nodded.

'Night Tank.' I said.

'Goodnight Steph, sleep well.' Tank kissed me lightly on my damp hair and then let himself out.

Ranger looked after him, 'you know you have all my men wrapped around your little finger, don't you?'

'Oh?' I smiled, 'and you think you're the exception to the rule?'

'No.' Ranger admitted, smiling ruefully, 'I think they're following my example.'

I laughed.

Ranger locked the door, 'Bedtime Babe.' He said, tugging my hand towards the bedroom. I got ready for bed, and then I handed Ranger his silk boxers – he had to wear something to bed, or I will not be held responsible for my actions. Ranger laughed as he took his boxers from me, and then he went into the bathroom to get ready.

I slid between my covers, feeling sleepy as the day caught up with me. Ranger set the keypad, and put his gun on the bedside table. He slipped into bed; he stroked my hair out of my face and leaned down, 'Goodnight Babe.' He whispered, kissing me softly.

'Goodnight Ranger.' I whispered back.

Ranger slung his arm across my waist and spooned me from behind. With his warmth at my back, and the sound of his steady breathing filling my ears, I was soon lulled to sleep.