Disclaimer: I do not own Hero Academia/Boku No Hero Academia, or any other property in this work that I did not make myself.
Mineta tries flirting with...
Chapter fourteen: Little Horn
The audience that had been summoned to the theater room by the Realmcrafter Talespinner69 had just finished watching the last episode of a realm where, once per episode, Mineta tries to flirt with a different girl in his year of UA's hero course. ...Or rather, it should have been the final episode of said show; after the last episode ended, the big theater screen flashed colors as a message announced that, since all thirteen of the base episodes of the show had been viewed, all five bonus episodes of the show had been unlocked.
"This is sort of like what happened in the show where we watched realms where I expelled a different one of the students in my homeroom class per realm," Aizawa remarked.
"But there was only one realm slash episode in that case, Shouta," Hound Dog pointed out, "This time, we got five to worry about."
Looking down to Tale and Kotaro where they stood on the stage in front of the big theater screen, Sekijiro said, "Did you know anything about th-"
"Yeah, yeah, hold on," Tale said as he spoke into a phone, not even having heard Sekijiro. After ending the call and putting the phone away, Tale said to the audience, "Yeah, sorry about that, but I was on the phone. Anyway, sorry if this is short notice, but I'm summoning more people into the audience."
The audience watched as Tale wove some ninja hand signs, after which the Wild Wild Pussycats and Lady Nagant were all summoned to the theater room. Tale conjured lights and flung them at the heads of the new audience members, with said lights going into their heads thus catching them up on everything. "Alright you guys, sit down," Tale instructed, prompting the newly summoned audience members to all sit down.
"Hang on, I have a question about the bonus episodes," Nagant began after she sat down, "From what I had gathered due to the info you put into my mind, there is only thirteen girls for the grape boy to go after, and all thirteen of them have already gone. Who is left for the grape boy to set his sights on?"
"Also can I strangle the grape boy?" Pixie-Bob asked as she raised a hand.
Holding up his hands, Kotaro said, "Listen, ladies. We have no idea about what could be in the bonus episodes, as the nature of bonus episodes and realms is a fickle mistress."
"Also I'd really rather you leave Mineta be," Tale added. Turning to look at Kotaro, Tale said, "Well we better get this mess started."
"I got the first bonus episode fired and ready to go," Kotaro replied as he turned to face the big theater screen and turned it on with the remote. Everyone looked on as they waited in eager anticipation to see who the first of the girls in the bonus episodes Mineta will be trying to have some fun with.
...
(Mineta tries flirting with Eri)
"Oh hell no!" Mineta in the audience exclaimed, "No! Why am I going to be flirting with a kid less than half my age?! That's wrong!"
"Well that's one good point on Mineta," Kyoka remarked dryly, "He knows better than to try to do his thing with little girls."
Looking up at Aizawa as she was sitting on his lap, Eri asked in a curious tone, "Hey Aizawa, if the grape boy really did try to-"
"I'd expel him on the spot," Aizawa replied instantly, cutting Eri off. In the audience where they sat, both Izuku and Mirio looked rather unamused, with the latter even cracking his knuckles.
Mineta had just made his way back to his class's dorm building after he had officially failed to get with any of the girls in his year of UA's hero course. It was around dinner time, so he ran into a few of his classmates at the island counter in the kitchen area, those being Kaminari, Sero, and Kirishima. All of them looked up from their meals as they saw Mineta approach.
"I can only assume you failed," Sero began.
"Well Hizashi-sensei messed up my attempt at appealing to Tokage with music by singing loud enough to interrupt me and cause all of the 1-B girls to go deaf temporarily," Mineta pointed out.
Nodding in understanding, Kirishima remarked, "That would explain what Aizawa-sensei told me about how he had to escort the 1-B girls to see Recovery Girl while Sekijiro-sensei expressed some issues to Hizashi-sensei."
"Didn't he grip the front of my jacket while repeatedly punching me in the face?" Hizashi in the audience asked.
Shrugging, Sekijiro said, "...Yeah, I'd do something similar if you pulled that for real."
Sighing as he sat down with the guys, Mineta remarked, "It's not fair. How come I failed with every girl I tried to work with? I mean, I know what girls like in boys, as well as what boys like in girls. I should have been able to-"
"You know what boys like in girls?"
Mineta and the other guys looked over when they heard a young girl's voice call up to them. As such, Mineta and the others saw Eri looking up at them, although mostly at Mineta. "You said that you know what boys like in girls," the horned girl said as she focused on Mineta, "Is that really true?"
Mineta, a bit of an unsure look on his face since it was Eri who was asking him, said as he turned to more fully face her, "...Yes, but you're a bit too young for me."
"Oh thank goodness I have morals in this realm," Mineta in the audience said as he gestured to the bit theater screen.
Folding her arms over her chest, Mandalay remarked, "From what all had been put into my mind about everything in all shows, I doubt that."
"I'd still like to strangle him," Pixie-Bob added.
"Hush, you," Tale mildly scolded.
Eri had a bit of an annoyed looking pouty expression on her face in response to that. "You aren't the boy that I like," Eri said, "I was just wondering if you'd be able to help me."
"Alright, let me hear it," Mineta replied, his interest piqued by Eri asking him to help her get a boy she likes to like her back, "Now, who's the lucky boy who you like?"
At that, Eri looked a bit embarrassed, even looking down a bit. "Umm...I like Asui-kun."
"Tsuyu's a girl," Sero pointed out.
"Not her! She's Asui-kun's big sister!" Eri explained.
"Wait a minute," Kirishima began, "You like Tsuyu's little brother Samidare?!" Eri, still looking embarrassed, nodded in the affirmative.
"She has a crush on Samidare in this realm?" Tsuyu in the audience remarked, "Oh, now that is just precious!"
"Aww, I bet they'd be adorable together!" Mina remarked, gushing over how cute it sounded.
Looking up at Aizawa, Eri asked, "He's the boy who wants to protect his big sis from the naughty boy, right Aizawa?"
"Yes, Asui's younger brother does indeed want to keep her safe from people who would lewd her," Aizawa replied. The underground hero smirked a little in amusement, finding it cute that Eri in this realm liked Tsuyu's younger brother.
Mineta, looking a bit confused, remarked, "...Okay. I can see how you and Tsuyu's brother could potentially work."
Eri looked excited at the prospect of her working with Samidare. "So you'll help me get Asui-kun to like me?"
"Well not now as it's a bit late in the evening," Mineta replied, "But you can see me down here first thing tomorrow morning during breakfast and we can get cracking on it then." Eri nodded in thanks before turning around and skipping away excitedly.
When Mineta turned back to face the guys, Kaminari said, "Dude, you better not screw up with Eri here. She's basically Aizawa-sensei's daughter, so if you use your usual nature with her in her bid to get Samidare to like her, you'll get in trouble with more than one person."
"Basically my daughter?" Aizawa in the audience said in a confused tone.
Shrugging, Tale said, "Well some of my kind sort of have the impression that you're Eri's foster dad at a minimum. And from what we've gleaned about the way you handle taking care of Eri, we believe that you'd make for one hell of a dad."
Aizawa blushed in embarrassment, even more so when Eri, who giggled cutely, leaned into him and gave him a hug. "Does that mean Izuku and Mirio are my big brothers?" Eri asked innocently enough, prompting both Izuku and Mirio to blush out of embarrassment.
"I know better than to use my mature material here, Kaminari," Mineta replied, "Eri and that little brother of Tsuyu's are both little kids. Their young age requires that a different approach be used in the process of trying to bring them together." The guys, looking as if they could tell that Mineta was being honest here, nodded tentatively in approval as they went back to eating their dinner.
...
The following morning, Mineta stood in front of Eri in the kitchen area of the 1-A dorm building, with Sero, Kaminari, and Kirishima standing nearby watching. "Okay Eri, there's a few steps to getting a boy to like you," Mineta began, "The first thing you should consider is trying to compliment him. Say nice things about him to him."
"Compliment Asui-kun?" Eri replied.
Gesturing to Eri, Mineta explained, "Boys like to hear it when a girl says nice things about them. It can even help to sustain their life force to a degree in some cases."
"Mineta...is actually trying to do a good job," Kyoka in the audience said, sounding surprised.
"And his attempt to help is commendable," Tenya remarked.
"See?!" Mineta exclaimed, "I can do good!"
Eri looked like she was considering the notion a bit before she looked back up to Mineta and said, "Is that why Izuku and Mirio always smile and laugh a little when I tell them that they are both super awesome?"
Shrugging, Mineta replied, "That's sort of the idea, yes." The guys and Eri heard a bit of a talk going on over at the front door of the dorm building; looking over, they saw that Uraraka and Tsuyu were going to take Samidare with them somewhere, and the group was being seen off by Izuku and Tokoyami. "Here's a chance, Eri," Mineta said as he pointed to where the girls stood with Samidare, "Go up to Tsuyu's little brother and say something nice about him to him."
Eri nodded vigorously before turning to go run over to the girls and Samidare. Over where the girls were at, they and the others there were a bit surprised to see Eri come up to them. "Oh, why hello there, Eri," Uraraka greeted, "What's up?"
"Umm, there's something that I need to say to Asui-kun," Eri replied, sounding a little embarrassed as she gestured a little to Samidare.
"Ooh, this is going to be precious, I can just tell kero," Tsuyu in the audience remarked.
"Yeah, I kind of want to see what happens here myself," Mirio said.
"Oh?" Tsuyu said, a hint of mild amusement in her tone as she was seeing that Eri was trying to talk to Samidare, "You need to talk to Samidare?" The boy himself piqued up a bit, although he looked a bit nervous.
After fidgiting a little, Eri said, "I think that Asui-kun...that he looks really nice. And he smells good. And I like what he's wearing. Also he's smart and not a doofus."
Samidare lit up a bit out of embarrassment as he covered his face with his hands, moaning a bit in an embarrassed tone. "Uhhhhn..."
Eri looked worried that she might have made Samidare upset because of how he sounded, but Tsuyu said, "Well that's really sweet of you, Eri. Also don't worry about Samidare being shy like he is right now, he's just a sweet natured kid that gets embarrassed easily."
"Oooh, that is just precious!" Mina in the audience exclaimed.
Chuckling a bit, Mirio said, "Yeah, I have to agree. Eri trying to flirt with a boy for the first time is just downright adorable to watch."
"I'm actually doing good here!" Mineta declared, "Yes!"
"Yes, Asui-kun does have a sweet nature," Eri replied, "I bet that his nature is as sweet as candy apples."
This time, the girls and the boys chuckled in amusement at Eri being nice to Samidare while the boy himself moaned a bit more in embarrassment. "...Thank you," Samidare replied after a bit of time, his hands still covering his face. Tsuyu and Uraraka then took off with Samidare, and Izuku and Tokoyami went their separate ways. This left Eri alone as she turned to face where Mineta and the others stood.
Shooting Eri a thumbs up, Mineta said, "So far so good, Eri!"
"That's so sweet!" Mina in the audience said, "Eri successfully completed step one!"
"And Mineta of all people helped her with it," Kyoka remarked, a hint of surprise in her tone.
Folding her arms over her chest, Tsuyu said, "...I wanna see where this goes kero. I mean, Mineta is trying to help Eri appeal to Samidare, and he's my little brother. A girl can't help but worry about her little brother sometimes, you know." Cracking a smile, Tsuyu went on, "But it is very sweet that it's looking good so far."
...
A short while later, Mineta and the guys were talking to Eri some more in the kitchen area of the 1-A dorm building, although it was mainly Mineta who was working with her. "Step number two that ought to help get Tsuyu's little brother to like you," Mineta said to Eri, "Is to try giving him a gift. A small little something, it doesn't have to be too big, will go a long way. It'll help if the thing you give him has some sort of special meaning to you."
Eri looked like she was thinking a bit about what Mineta said, before her expression lit up as she said, "Oh!" Eri ran out to the kitchen area, then came back a few seconds later holding a slightly big Red Delicious apple. "I like apples best, so would giving Asui-kun an apple work?"
Mineta had a mildly pondering look on his face as he considered what Eri suggested. "...It could work, yes." At that moment, the front doors of the 1-A dorm building opened, and Tsuyu and Uraraka walked back in with Samidare. All of them were carrying a lot of grocery bags.
"There's your target, Eri," Mineta said, "Go give him the apple. And make sure you explain why you feel giving him the apple is important." Eri nodded before turning around and running over to where the girls came back with Samidare.
Despite himself, Aizawa in the audience couldn't help but chuckle. "...Yeah, this really is cute."
"It's so sweet that I fear it may give me diabetes," Hizashi commented.
"She's a cutie-patootie is what she is," Tiger commented.
Turning to look at Tiger, Endeavor said, "Who uses the phrase 'cutie-patootie' anymore?"
"How does something like that of all things bother you?" All For One asked, "No, seriously."
As Tsuyu, Uraraka, and Samidare were setting the grocery bags down, Eri came up to them. "Oh, hello again, Eri," Uraraka said, only for her and the Asui siblings to be cut off when Eri held up the apple she had to Samidare.
"Umm, apples are my favorite, and they're super yummy," Eri said, sounding a bit nervous, "So I want to give you one, Asui-kun."
Samidare blushed a little bit again as he replied in a mildly embarrassed tone, "Th-Thank you." He then somewhat nervously accepted the apple from Eri.
"Aww, that is so sweet!" Yaoyorozu in the audience said.
"And it's all thanks to my influence," Mineta pointed out, "I told you I was capable of doing good!"
Folding his arms over his chest, Stain remarked, "...I want to see where this goes before I decide if I really should delay your execution."
"Aww, now that is just precious kero," Tsuyu said to Eri, "You're a real sweetheart, Eri. It's also really nice of you to-"
"Oh!" Samidare said suddenly, cutting his older sister off before beginning to search through the grocery bags a bit. After a few seconds, he found what he was looking for, then took something out of the bag and went over to Eri to gently hand it to her. Samidare handed some sort of fruit to Eri that she didn't recognize.
"What is it?" Eri asked.
"It's a peach, Eri," Tsuyu began to explain, "Similar to how apples are your favorite, peaches are Samidare's favorite." Tsuyu offered a warm and sincere smile. "...My guess is that Samidare wanted to share his favorite with you since you're extending the same courtesy to him kero."
"Samidare likes peaches in this realm, huh?" Tsuyu in the audience remarked.
Shrugging, Rappa said, "I think it's helping to make the whole kids flirting with one another thing all the sweeter."
"I have to agree," Fat Gum replied, a small but sincere smile on his face, "This is getting more and more precious."
Eri giggled cutely as she thanked Samidare, then she took a bite out of the peach that Samidare had given her. Likewise, Samidare bit into the apple that Eri gave him. As Tsuyu and Uraraka gushed over how cute the scene was, Mineta, Sero, Kirishima, and Kaminari were all watching what was going on from the kitchen area. "It's better than I expected," Mineta said.
...
Later that evening, Mineta and the guys were still working with Eri, the slight dampness in her hair suggesting she had just showered or bathed. "I'm clean now since I took a bath," Eri said, "Would that help with getting Asui-kun to like me?"
"...Actually it sort of works with the third step I was going to tell you about," Mineta replied, "Presenting yourself in an appealing way. It helps a girl get a guy to like her if she's appealing, and being clean thus smelling good helps with being appealing."
"This could potentially go wrong since he's talking about Eri needing to be appealing," Mina in the audience said, her tone slightly suspicious.
Gesturing to the bit screen, Nejire said, "Well he's shown to be good so far, so maybe we're worried for nothing when it comes to him working with little Eri."
"What else would help with me being appealing to Asui-kun?" Eri asked.
"Dressing nicely is also a key factor," Mineta said, "So taking into account what you're wearing would be a good idea."
Eri looked like she was contemplating something before she looked back up to Mineta. "...Would it help me to appeal to Asui-kun if I dress the way that you like to see girls dress?"
Making the time out gesture with his hands, Mineta said, "Yeah no, that would be a bad idea for you, Eri. Not only could you potentially get into trouble if you dress like that, but I could also get into trouble as well since I am working with you."
"He's discouraging Eri from dressing the way he likes to see girls dress," Uraraka in the audience said, "That's actually pretty noble of him."
Folding her arms over her chest, Tsuyu commented, "Yeah, I can see how Eri could at the very least get scolded if she dressed the way Mineta likes to see girls dress. Mineta is making a good call here."
"I have standards, you know," Mineta pointed out.
"How should I dress, then?" Eri asked.
Holding his right index finger up a bit, Mineta said, "Your usual outfit of the white dress shirt, red pinafore, your leggings and the boots should be sufficient. It's a cute outfit for you, and I got it from Mina that the senseis got you a few multiples of the clothes for the outfit."
Eri nodded before running off to her room that she was provided. A few moments later, Eri came back wearing her usual outfit, minus the boots since everyone was inside. "So this will work?" Eri asked.
Mineta gave Eri a thumbs up while saying, "Bingo."
Gesturing to the big theater screen, Aizawa in the audience said, "Yeah, if Mineta for real would do stuff like this if he got roped into helping Eri get a boy to like her, then I wouldn't object."
"He's showing to be surprisingly marvelous with children," Tenya remarked, sounding mildly amazed.
After Mineta lowered his hand, Sero looked out into the living room as said, "Oh, Tsuyu's little brother is sitting on the sofa." Everyone looked over and saw that Samidare was sitting on the sofa in the living room area, watching something on TV. Samidare was currently wearing a baggy hockey jersey, baggy cargo shorts held up with a belt, and he wore socks on his feet.
"Oh, I can show him that I look pretty," Eri said, "Then maybe I can sit with him and we can watch cartoons together."
"Actually, it's six o' clock right now," Kaminari said as he pulled his phone out to check the time, "Tsuyu's little brother always watches the local news at this time according to Tsuyu."
Eri nodded in understanding before she went over to where Samidare was sitting. She got his attention by calling out, "Hey, umm, Asui-kun?" After Samidare turned to look at her, Eri asked, "Umm, what do you think about how I look?"
"Aww, she's a bit shy about asking Samidare about how she looks," Mina in the audience commented.
"Well my little brother has shown to be nice in return so far," Tsuyu pointed out, "He ought to be nice to her right now."
"And since he disapproves of rudeness towards girls if his dislike of Mineta's lewd nature towards us is any indication," Yaoyorozu went on, "I bet he'll be a gentleman."
Samidare looked at Eri for a few seconds in silence before saying simply, "You look nice. Also your hair looks pretty." Eri giggled cutely before thanking Samidare, then she asked if she could sit with him and watch TV with him. In response, Samidare scooted to his left then gently patted the area of the sofa on his right, which Eri took as a signal to join him, which she of course took Samidare up on.
"Wow, I think they're actually going to work out," Mineta said, then shrugged as he added, "It would seem I have a bit of a magic touch with girls after all."
"When helping them get with other guys, yes," Kirishima replied.
"He actually successfully helped Eri get with Samidare," Uraraka in the audience said, "Wow."
"Mineta did pretty good here," Izuku agreed with a nod.
Back over where Eri was watching the news with Samidare, the news anchor said, "Breaking news, pro heroes and UA teachers Eraserhead and Present Mic defeated the villains who were trying to rob a bakery slash cafe, even though the kitchen was destroyed in a fire slash explosion in the process. We now go live to where our field reporter is with the two heroes who had saved the day."
The news then cut to the field reporter talking to Aizawa and a somewhat guilty looking Hizashi. "I swear that I had no idea that the baguette would end up doing that," Hizashi said live on the news.
Turning to face Hizashi, Aizawa dryly said to him, "You are no longer allowed to use kitchens without supervision."
FIN
"...So the one screw up in this episode is actually all on Hizashi?" Aizawa said as the episode came to an end.
"I actually succeeded in some manner with a girl?" Mineta said in mild surprise.
"I got a boy to like me!" Eri cheered.
"Why did Sho take my kitchen privileges away?" Hizashi asked, looking a bit bemused.
Turning to face Kotaro, Tale said, "...I actually liked that episode."
"It's about time Mineta got a good show, yes," Kotaro agreed.
END OF CHAPTER
Author's notes;
This is the first of five bonus chapters for this story, and as promised this chapter is of a different fare than what's been seen thus far. Anyway, hopefully the next chapter will be out before long. Stay frosty.