Minister Riddle Will See You Now
Chapter 6: The Vow of Silence
*Disclaimer: Don't own HP or 50
**Going on vacation. Might be a couple weeks before any updates. Sorry!
Hermione arrived in much the same place she had been earlier that morning only this time Tom wasn't pressing into her. She looked around to see him standing up from the couch with two glasses of white white in his hands. He had taken off the fine quality robes and his socks and shoes. The necktie was loose and the top two or three buttons of his shirt were undone. The skin that was visible beneath his collar was pale with a few chest hairs visible. A visceral shiver broke through her at seeing such a discreetly male display.
"You took a long time," was the first thing Tom said to her.
Feeling wrong footed, Hermione explained, "I dropped my trunk off in my flat. I didn't stay longer than that."
Her glass of wine was offered to her but she felt over dressed so before she accepted it, she allowed her own robes to slide off her shoulders. Tom's mouth quirked up on one side as he traded the wine glass for her robes which he carefully laid over the back of his couch.
Tom led her to take a seat on the couch and Hermione reached down to remove her heels. She dropped them on the floor near the coffee table and sank into the comfort of Tom's furniture.
He sat next to her so gracefully that Hermione equally admired and was jealous of his ability to be so smooth with his motions.
The wine glasses clinked together for a second when Tom brought his glass close to hers.
"A toast to your past, present and future for they all culminate here tonight symbolically," he stated.
She drank and pondered his words. Her past was celebrated tonight and she was here in the present to discuss what might be a part of her future. The issue was that this future they were speaking of was still very much a mystery to her.
White wine had never been her favorite but this wine that Tom had selected for them was good. It was a sweet dessert wine and Hermione sipped it slowly, aware that she'd already had two glasses of champagne this evening.
The sound of Tom's glass touching down on the coffee table drew Hermione's attention away from the woods outside the glass windows across from the couch.
"You've signed the vow of silence and you're now under oath not to reveal anything to anyone without my express permission. Do you have questions?" he asked as he leaned back, one ankle crossed on his knee while his arm rested behind her on the couch. Not touching, but she could feel it's warmth on the bare portions of her shoulders.
"It was fairly easy to understand," Hermione said softly, trying not to lean into the arm behind her. She needed to focus on the conversation and the temptation of his body was already starting to wear her resolve down.
"Okay then, tell me what happened after I left Hogwarts tonight," Tom commanded as his finger dipped down from behind her to draw small circles on her bare shoulder.
"When exactly did you leave?"
"I danced with Minerva McGonagall while you were with Severus," he filled her in with an eyebrow raise to show her he was surprised by her choice of dance partner, "and then I left."
"Oh," Hermione was a little relieved that he had been around longer to watch her dance with anyone else. "I convinced Harry's dad to ask me to dance after that and then I waited with the other 7th years so we could ride the boats back. I apparated straight to my flat and dumped my trunk and I got out of dodge before Harry and Ginny could forget the silencing charm. Again," she told him wryly.
He grinned a little. "I suppose they are going to christen all the surfaces in the new flat while you're gone."
She shrugged a little uncomfortably. "There isn't much there. They could move to the one chair in the living room or the kitchen counters I guess."
Tom's head turned to her as if she had just said something interesting and she squirmed. His other hand clamped down on her hands to hold them still where they were twisting together in her lap.
"You're not afraid they'll use your room? You did set wards, right?"
Shaking her head, Hermione admitted, "Only thing in my room is my trunk and they have a trunk of Ginny's in her room. I don't wish to hear it or see it. I've walked in on it before so I'm only hoping when I get home that they've got it out of their system."
Tom seemingly ignored the last part of what she said and instead asked, "So you have no furniture? No bed?"
She sighed. Of course that's where he was going with his line of questioning. "Not yet but I'm good at transfiguration so I figured I'd either sleep as an animal or create my own mattress for the next week or so."
His dark green eyes glinted hard and she didn't really know what that meant but she hoped it meant he was not angry with her for something she had just said.
With a realization she blurted out, "I'm registered, don't worry!"
His eyes lost their hardness as he looked at her with amusement. "You're full of surprises tonight, aren't you?"
Hermione turned her head away, not liking to be teased about her accomplishments but he was having none of that. His cool fingers grasped her chin and turned her back to look at him.
"I'm not making fun. I was aware that you'd registered your animagus form," Tom told her.
A nod to accept his unspoken apology and Hermione said no more on the subject.
"So does your flatmate expect you home tonight?"
"Um, I dunno. She knows I have a date. She knows I've received letters from the same man that I'm on a date with. She knows you petrified her brother last night," Hermione admitted.
Slowly, Tom turned to face her a bit more. "But you don't know for sure if she knows whom you're with or when you'll be back?"
She pursed her lips and watched Tom run a hand through his hair in aggravation.
"So what incentive do I have to send you home tonight? What's keeping me from being a gentleman? Your friend wouldn't know the first way to start looking for you. Are you usually lacking self-preservation skills?"
"Only lately, it seems," she said in a small voice.
His face softened a little.
"Hermione, I'm struggling. With you here in my house again, looking as good as you do… I'm on my best behavior but there's a limit to my patience. You have no bed, no furniture, and probably no food to go home to. You have a flatmate that is engaged with her boyfriend in amorous activities all night and probably won't pay attention to where you are until it's daylight again. What of the other friend?"
"Luna went to her family home for the night and I don't know if she was sleeping there or going to the flat tonight. I'd guess staying with her father to afford Harry and Ginny privacy."
His lips were thin. "And does Luna know where you are?"
Hermione smiled ironically. "Luna has a way of knowing things without being told. She guessed your name aloud when they learned I had a date so I think she does know who I am with."
He sighed with relief. "Well, at least there's some incentive for me to give you back."
Not really sure how to admit the rest, Hermione shifted her position.
Not fooled by anything, Tom coaxed her, "Yes? You have something to confess?"
"I went to the library today to research vows before I signed it. A professor might have scolded me for researching on graduation day. I had the scroll on the table. I know you spelled it against others reading it but the professor opened it and asked me why it turned to gibberish when he read it."
Tom's face was blank, eerily so. "And which professor might this be?"
She searched his eyes hoping for a hint of whether he was mad or not. "Professor Snape," she whispered.
His face was the same but his body relaxed minisculey. "Ah. Severus. What did my friend have to say on the matter?"
Hermione was certain that Tom was waiting to hear the rest to determine his feelings on the matter and she was unsure how much to say.
"He, err, said he recognized the scroll and warned me that a vow of silence is only releasable by the caster. I knew this as I had been there all morning but he insisted on making sure I knew that death would not release me from the vow."
Silence. "Is that all dear Severus said?"
Not wanting to lie, Hermione added, "He didn't ask me any questions or pry. He offered to be there for me if I signed the vow should I need it and gave me a vague piece of advice that could apply to anything in life; said that not all paths are meant for everyone but that didn't make them all dead ends."
Now Tom smiled a little. "Did you quote Robert Frost in your speech because of Severus?"
Delighted that Tom knew Robert Frost, Hermione shook her head. "Ironically, that was already in my speech."
Tom summoned a water pitcher and put some water in her empty wine glass which she drank.
"Severus," Tom confided, "is a friend of mine. He is under the same vow of silence you are and I believe he was simply trying to make sure you knew that so that you wouldn't think the worst of why a vow was required."
That did make sense but his comments about not letting one person define her still stuck out as odd.
"I know you're anxious to get to the reason for the vow and I promise that it's coming but first I need some information from you," Tom told her. He had picked up her hands in his the second her water was finished and her glass set down.
"O-okay," Hermione stuttered.
"Are you interested in a relationship with me?"
"Yes." Her heart was beating hard.
"Are you willing to commit to it fully?"
"Define fully," she questioned nervously.
"No dating other boys. No kissing, touching, or any sexual encounters of any kind with any other person but me," Tom said with a straight face, no blushing.
"Yes," she exhaled, hoping he was asking because he was too.
"And, in this relationship, are you willing to relinquish all control to me?"
"Err, what?" She was confused. Control?
"I mean what I say. Would you be okay knowing that I would be in charge of our relationship," he told her, eyes dark and trained on hers.
She licked her lips. "Can I have some examples?"
Smiling a little wickedly, Tom said, "I decide the aspects of our sexual relationship. I would wish for you to trust me and submit to me in as many aspects of our relationship as possible."
"What about my personal life?" she asked, news waves of anxiety and little bit of despair filling her at what this new information was indicating.
"Your personal life is part of our relationship but it would depend on how those decisions affected our sexual relationship, mostly."
"So I can choose my job and what to wear and eat and to spend time with my friends?"
He paused. "Yes, unless it interferes with my plans."
Her brain was firing on all cylinders now. "So you had me sign a vow of silence to inform me that a relationship with you is a form of slavery?"
Tom shook his head. "I am a possessive and controlling man, Hermione. I don't do relationships with witches because of this. I know my true nature and I have worked very hard to conceal it from the public. Society does not appreciate a man that covets power like I do. I need the control, it's like a form of therapy for me."
So she was going to be his therapy? She felt a crashing wave of disappointment at having thought that she meant something more to him than just a person to control.
"Talk to me," Tom commanded and now so much of his behavior was making sense to her. "I can't answer questions or correct your thinking if you don't communicate."
Turning to him, she felt a tear slip down her cheek. He instantly wiped it away with his thumb tenderly and Hermione instantly was torn. She yearned for his touches like that, the ones that made her feel safe and cared for and special. But, if he needed to exert control over her in order to function as a wizard and human being, she wasn't sure how much of that she could handle before self-destructing.
"I thought I was more than that," she admitted, another tear escaping the other eye.
He tugged her into his body and despite her brain yelling at her to back away and to stop ingesting the poison that was going to kill her, she inhaled his scent and allowed him to wrap her up.
"No, don't think like that. You misunderstand me. It's because you are special that you're here. I don't date. Ever. I know I have issues and I can't let the public know about them or I'd be removed from office. You are a wonderful thing that I was not planning for. Ever since we met, I have wanted you. This is the only way I know of that I can have you. I need control or I won't be able to offer you anything."
She sniffed and spoke into his shoulder. "So the vow covers the fact that you're a control freak?"
"Yes."
"And any of the things we do in our relationship that hint at that, those are covered under the vow?"
"Yes."
"So I'd be lying to my friends daily about my relationship? Or, would I pretend to have no relationship? Would I simply say I'm dating a different person and wait until they assume I've made up an imaginary friend?"
Tom snorted. "No, you would be allowed to tell them we're dating if that is what you want. In fact, if we're going to date, I'll demand it. I've got a possessive streak like you've never seen and the sooner I can make sure the world knows you're mine, the better."
She couldn't help but gasp. "How can you be so sure? You hardly know me! Next week you could tire of me and then the press will think I'm a heartbreaker and you will have to explain why you only had a relationship for a week."
When Tom did not reply she pulled back to look at him. He wasn't guilty looking but the lack of other emotions hinted that what she had just said was not true.
"I know you better than you think," he finally admitted.
She raised an eyebrow and Tom sighed. "I've researched you pretty well since I met you, Miss Granger."
"Well, I researched you a little as well," she admitted. "I didn't know much and Luna's questions made me look bad so I read up on you."
The quirk of his lips was arrogant as he regarded her as though what she said was cute.
"I have access to a lot more information than you do," he stated baldly.
This was probably a gross invasion of her privacy, she knew, but she was a little flattered that she made such an impression on him that he looked into who she was.
"Look, if you're not interested, you are allowed to leave," Tom reminded her. "But if you go, that's it. The vow kicks in and we will have nothing more than a professional relationship."
She chewed her lip. "Is there a learning curve to the relationship? I've never been in one and I don't know how I'll feel being controlled. I'm used to being in control of myself."
His hand was palming her cheek and jaw now, making her feel small in comparison. "I've never been in one either. Not like this. Usually my relationships are purely sexual."
She choked a little at hearing this. "S-so you're not...celebate, then?"
He threw his head back and laughed. "No, Hermione, I'm not. I have sexual relationships with witches that meet my needs but you, you're different. I want you all to myself in every aspect. I sense your power and your intelligence. I want more than sex; I want possession."
A deluge of fluttering feelings hit her all at once. She was special after all. She licked her lips and stared at his, hoping that he would kiss her. If she weren't next to him so close, she would probably worry about his need to possess her rather than simply to have her for a sexual partner.
"There's a little more to discuss first, Hermione," Tom told her firmly, having known somehow where her mind had gone.
She blushed. Again.
"I need you to understand that my sexual relationships are about control. Are you accepting of that?"
Her blush still stained her cheeks as she meekly asked, "Can I get a couple examples?"
Tom was not shy. "I might bind your hands to the bedposts. I could spank you when warranted. I would have sex with you when I wanted to and where I wanted to and how I wanted to. And, you would like it."
She felt wet all of the sudden at just hearing his voice deepen when he told her that she would like it because she believed him. She was desperate for him to touch her and anything he offered her at this point was like a glass of water to a person stumbling out of the desert.
Stroking her cheek, Tom whispered against her lips, "All I need to know is if you are interested in those things. I have to have your consent for it to work. I'm not into rape or non-consensual sex, Hermione. You have to be honest with me here. I want to control you, but I want you to want me to control you. Is that something you'd be willing to try for me?"
She breathed in his scent. "I don't know," she answered truthfully.
"You don't know? Explain?"
She squirmed and his hands were on her knees as he leaned back to look her in the eyes.
"I've not had sex before so I don't really know about that part and the other part of me chaffs at the idea of not being allowed to make my own decisions," she admitted.
His expression would have been comical if she weren't currently worried about what it meant for the offer he'd just made her.
Green eyes widened in shock, perfectly sculpted lips popped open and his hands slackened on her knees.
"Are you being truthful?!" he demanded.
She nodded, feeling suddenly worried that she was now going to be taken to her back flat with no further ado.
His hands were running through his hair now. He stood up and paced away from her towards the glass window.
"I'm sorry, Hermione," he said sincerely as he promptly swiveled around and looked at her again. "Do you want to go? The vow stands but if you want to leave, I'll take you home."
Panicking a little, she stood. "What? Go? No! Why would I want to go?"
Scepticism crossed his face as he looked her over. "I knew you'd not dated anyone but I didn't think you were a virgin. Fuck! Do you know how rare you are?"
She shook her head, not understanding. Virginity was embarrassing to have at 19 but it wasn't unheard of. She had a muggle friend who was 24 when she married and still a virgin until her wedding night.
Tom sat down next to her again and picked up one of her hands in his. Placing a sweet kiss against the back of it, Tom told her, "In the wizarding world, hormones affect your magic. Virginity causes stress to the body due to frustration and lack of relief. You cast better magic when you're satisfied. That's why there are so many dark spells centering on sex magic."
Hermione had never read about any of this because she'd never been tempted by someone to explore this topic of discussion.
Continuing, Tom explained, "Taking someone's virginity gives a power boost but it's temporary. Receiving someone's virginity forms a link that weakens over time. It gives a power boost to one's own magic that lasts until the weak bond dissolves."
Her eyes watched her own hand as Tom caressed it. She felt ashamed of the fact that she didn't know any of this. Ever since entering the wizarding world, she had devoured as much pureblood ethics and traditions as she could in order to blend in better. For seven years she had read everything that she could to aid her in the task of proving that she belonged. She'd never read anything without a purpose and so a gaping error was now visible. She'd never considered there to be magic in sex because her only background on that topic was from her muggle roots.
All around her, her school mates had been hormonally crazy. She had just rolled her eyes when she witnessed the shift that occurred with her year mates suddenly becoming obsessed with satisfying their urges. Harry and Ginny suddenly made more sense. She really wanted to escape this embarrassing conversation to find a book to read and not return until she'd spent about 8 hours in a library.
"Hermione?" Tom had his head tilted a bit so he could peer into her eyes.
"I-I didn't know. I'm sorry," she whispered.
"You're sorry?"
She nodded.
"For what? You've done nothing wrong, I'm merely surprised. The longer you wait, the more magic is transferred and the more potent the exchange is but...fuck, Hermione! It's hard to hang onto innocence the way you have. 17 is the latest most wizards or witches make it before their magic is shaky or unstable. Your magic isn't, I've seen enough to know that you are adept at magic. Your professors can't sing enough praises. No one would imagine you're a virgin still."
If she weren't in a bit of shock, she'd have blushed. Licking her lips a bit, her mouth was parched, she asked him, "Why didn't Ginny tell me?"
A hand was brushing her hair away from her face and even though she was looking at the collar of his shirt, she knew he was looking at her eyes.
"Did she know you'd never had sex?"
Nodding, Hermione admitted, 'She helped me get dressed today. She and Luna both."
Luna didn't say anything today either and there is no way she hadn't followed Ginny's insinuations.
"They helped you dress? What happened?"
This conversation was starting to make her uncomfortable, more uncomfortable, than she had ever been before. "I pulled out knickers that Ginny had bought me long ago. Tags were still on. She was shocked. Why wouldn't she say something?"
The hand on her hand was stroking gently. "If she had reasons to believe you had a date tonight and knew you were putting them on, she probab;y assumed you had planned to take care of it and therefore whatever she had to say was pointless," Tom assured her.
Well, he wasn't wrong. Besides, Ginny and Luna both knew not to argue a point with Hermione when she'd made her mind up.
"Can we…." Hermione looked up at him. "Can we ignore this information?"
Tom smiled and shook his head slowly. "No, baby, we can't."
Her heart stuttered at the endearment that slipped off his tongue so smoothly. It made her heart swell inside her chest to hear him call her something as mundane, as muggle, as 'baby'.
Tom leaned back a bit, bringing her with him and tucking her into his chest and under his chin. He stroked her hair. "Virginity given now is a very rare and precious gift, Hermione. You'll need to decide what to do with it and I can't make that decision for you so you'll need to be educated. Do you trust me to give you the correct information or would you like me to take you home for now?"
That was an unexpected offer. If her virginity was powerful, wouldn't he want it? He could have said nothing about the sex magic and simply allowed her to offer it blindly. He hadn't, though.
"I trust you to be honest with me," she confessed to his shirt.
Okay," Tom breathed into her hair. "The first thing you should know is that you don't have to perform a ritual. You can simply have sex and allow a power exchange. Your partner would receive a boost from you as the recipient and you would receive a boost by being sated. A temporary bond would form but given time and distance that would dissolve. It's not much different for muggles. Sex releases oxytocin, dopamine, and prolactin, as the muggles call it. These hormones cause the participants to feel emotionally attached to their partner. It fades with time or after the next partner. It's the same for each encounter but it's stronger the first experience."
This made sense with what she knew from her muggle background.
"But," Tom continued, "There are some rituals that can be done to harness virginity when given. These rituals cannot be used when it is taken against a person's will and they can only be done on the witch's terms."
His hands tipped her head back so she could see his wry grin. "How's that for a flip on the usually misogynist way of things?"
Her face broke into a small smile at the irony. "Are the rituals dark?" She snuggled back into him and breathed in his sandalwood scent.
There was a pause. "Well, dark magic is dark because of intent so I would say that it's mostly a safe ritual but it could be used for dark purposes," he admitted. "The ritual basically creates a blood diamond from the witch's essence. There's a spell to expel her essence after the deed and an enchantment spoken to turn the essence into the blood diamond. The diamond is imbued with the power boost and can be worn for extra protection. It's not an easy spell so many people don't bother. Only powerful witches can really do it so it's fallen out of practice."
It wasn't really a choice on whether to do the spell or not, was it?
"You said there are other rituals?" Hermione asked.
"Well, there are a couple more but one of them is for when both partners are virgins and the other is for when a fertility potion is taken in combination to deflowering on the wedding night. The other is for transferring both power boosts into one person. I think the only other one is a marriage ritual that is unbreakable. I'd have to read up on it as I'm not familiar with it," Tom admitted. The tone of his voice was carefully even, as though he didn't want Hermione to be aware of his feelings on the options he had explained.
Her thoughts ran a kilometer a minute but really her choices were limited and her preference was easy to discern.
"Tom?"
"Yes?"
"Would you help me?"
He went still. "What do you require help with?"
Damn. He was going to make her say it.
"Would you help me with my virginity? And," she took a deep breath. "I'd like to try to make a blood diamond."
Fingers were stroking her back. "Is this truly what you want? You don't owe me anything. The thought of you being with any other man makes me irrationally furious but I can let you go if that's what you want."
Her stomach drops. "So if that's what I wanted, you'd not want me anymore?"
"What!? No, of course not," Tom was angry as he pulled her off of him, his two long fingered hands wrapped around her upper arms and guided her off of him so they could see each other's face. "I would want you, oh, Hermione, I would still want you. I just really loathe the idea of you with someone else. This," here he gestured with a finger pointing from her chest and then to his own, "only works if you want it too, though. Consent is key and vital and absolutely a requirement.'
She exhaled in relief.
Tom looked at her with an expression akin to worry. "Did you really think I would only want your virginity? Virginity that I was not aware you still retained? Or, did you think that I would be so Elizibethean as to think you defiled after giving it to someone other than me?"
His face was hard and he was breathing with enough force to indict his emotions and Hermione was in awe of how strongly he was reacting to her self-deprecating thoughts.
His hand left her arm and ran through his black hair. "You either think very little of me or very little of yourself, Hermione, and my experience with Gryffindors tends to make me think it's the latter."
Feeling she owed him an explanation, Hermione opened her mouth to speak but wasn't sure what to say. "I've always been seen as the brains. I've never been viewed as a beauty or as an object of sexuality. I don't mean to seem as though I'm fishing for compliments all the time or that I don't think I'm worth anything I'm just not used to knowing other people thought so too."
He blinked and then he leaned in slowly. He moved in a way that allowed her to back away or to turn her head, his intentions were clear. His lips were within kissing distance from hers but he did not kiss her. He waited.
She moved in on his lips and kissed him. It was soft, it was tender, it was everything their first kiss had not been. Hermione could feel him holding back as she brushed his lips with her own before he pulled back.
"If you would like my assistance, I am at your service. I have the pertinent information for the ritual if you would like to perform it but this is entirely your choice. You do not need to choose to perform one. You also may take time to decide-"
"No," Hermione interrupted him. She was sure this was what she wanted and she did not want him to try to change her mind. "No, I came here having signed your vow of silence and with the hope to spend the night with you. This...revelation...doesn't change anything other than put a pause on it long enough to read up on it."
Tom smiled and laughed a little. "Well, we have a bit more talking to do first. You are aware that I seek to dominate you sexually? That I get off on having control of more than just your body during sex?"
He paused to allow her to process what he had said before he continued. "I will want to tell you to do something and I will expect you to do it. I will want to let me perform a sexual act with you or to you and you will do more than allow it, you'll want it."
"How can you be so sure that I will want it," Hermione blurted out.
A wicked smile overtook his face as though he were listening to some dirty joke only he could hear. "Oh, trust me, I'm very persuasive and I've very well trained at this. I can evoke the feelings in you. I'm decent at picking out which witches are submissives in the bedroom and which are not. I'm good at reading body signals and language. Your body responds to me so well that it's classic. It's textbook."
She sat up straight, affronted. She resented being told she was predictable as it was a synonym for 'reliable' which caused people to take her for granted.
He must have seen she was offended. "Don't read into it. You're a control freak yourself so you can understand my needs. Why else would you be so neurotic about your study schedules and exams and everything else important to you?"
The word 'neurotic' had a negative connotation that she despised but he wasn't wrong even though she was not going to admit that to nhim.
"The difference between us, Hermione," he purred, "is that I need possession and I control that need. My need spills over into every aspect of my life. Sexual domination is the way I've compartmentalized my needs so that I don't try to control too much and become a psychopath," he admitted to her.
"You, however, are the type who need to surrender control at the end of the day. I can prove it to you," he told her as he stroked a finger up her thigh. "Give me a couple months and I'll help you compartmentalize your coping mechanism into sexual submission so that you are more relaxed in your day to day life."
Her head was spinning with this new information and she was torn between wanting Tom now and wanting to hide away and think. She edged away from him to hopefully think.
"Don't," Tom warned. "Don't do that. This is what I am talking about. If you agree to what I'm offering, you won't be overwhelmed like you are right now. Let me help you by telling you what I would have you do if you were to agree to what I've proposed."
She counted to ten in her head and breathed before nodding her head as she stared at him.
"You want me. You want to perform the ritual. You're going to let me help you with both," Tom told her with a confident voice. "We're going to enjoy ourselves tonight and I'll give you a few tastes of what things can be like with me. Tomorrow, we can continue to discuss what the rest of an agreement between us might mean. Give me one night where you'll agree to try it my way before you make a decision. The worst case scenario would be the successful dissipation of your virginity, the creation of a protective blood stone, and us parting ways."
None of what he said sounded bad except that she was nervous about being forced to perform an act she was uncomfortable with.
Lips pressed into her forehead. "What's worrying you about this?"
To her ears, her breath sounded stuttered. "That you'll want me to do something I won't like."
He chuckled. "Here's the catch on sexual domination, Hermione. You have the power. I can't make you do something you don't want. I'll tell you to do something or to let me do something and if it's distasteful, you do not provide consent and that's it. We don't do it."
Confusion settled over her. "But...you'll want me to do it, whatever you're suggesting. How is it sexual domination if I get a choice?"
His hand was twirling a lock of her hair around his fingers and he studied it, seemingly fascinated. "Well, you wouldn't be a very good sexual submissive if you constantly refused consent to me but then again, a good sexual dominant knows the limits of his partner and wouldn't be pushing things that she would not agree to. It's a learning process at first just like any friendship is at first. You've probably made a friend and accidentally done or said something that bothered them because you didn't know it would upset them or vice versa. Sexual relationships are much the same, even in vanilla ones."
Vanilla?" she wrinkled her nose.
"Vanilla as in no kinks."
With caution, Hermione asked, "And sexual domination is enough to help you deal with your issues in day to day life?"
Tucking the curl he'd been playing with behind her ear, Tom licked his lip lightly. "Here's where it gets confusing. I'm possessive. I don't usually get possessive about the witches I fuck. They serve my purpose and out of the bedroom, they don't mean much to me nor do I to them. You," he exhaled. "You're different. I've not even had sex with you and I'm more possessive about you than I should be. After seeing the troglodyte at your place of work slobbering on you and then the Weasley boy at The Three Broomsticks...I know that I'll need more from you. I don't do the girlfriend thing but I very much want you to be mine."
She scooted into the seat in the middle of the couch rather than sharing Tom's seat on the couch. The concept he was proposing was contradictory. He wanted her sexually, she understood that. He wanted to dominate her, she understood that, too. He wanted her to be his, but not his girlfriend? That was where the line got blurry. He wanted to control her but not be her partner? She told him this and saw his brow furrow as he considered her words.
"I've never done this before," he confessed. "I know that after you leave my bedroom, I'll not want boys to look at you or touch you."
She snorted. "Good. I've decided I don't like boys anyway."
His eyebrows disappeared in surprise and she blushed.
"I don't mean it like that, it's just…it's your fault!"
"My fault?"
"Yes," she snapped, irritated. "It's your fault that the boys my age sudden;y seem droll and uncouth."
"Droll and uncouth?" he repeated amusedly.
"It's not funny! Wizards my own age have no manners and are extremely selfish," she blamed him.
He was still smirking as he asked, "And you only realized this because of me?"
She fidgeted. "Well, you, Professor Snape, Professor Lupin, even Harry's Dad, you all have more manners than the wizards I just graduated with."
He tipped his head back and laughed like she'd not seen before and she had to smile a little in spite of herself.
"That's because they've been trained by witches already. Wizards your age have yet to learn much about witches. James Potter and Remus Lupin are married and learned their lessons the hard way."
"And you and Professor Snape?" she questioned.
"Were educated by old school purebloods to treat witches with respect the way that most wizards aren't taught anymore."
This was a surprise to her as Ron Weasely and Neville Longbottom and Terry Boot were all three purebloods and none of them offered her a hand into the carriage. None of them carried her bag or books for her.
Rolling his eyes, Tom confided in her, "If you'd ever spent time with my godson one on one, you'd have seen the old manners displayed."
"How do you know I've never spent time around Draco? He doesn't like me so I doubt I'd have seen manners directed toward me."
Shaking his head sternly, Tom said, "Draco couldn't tell me much about you when I received your patronus the last night so I know that much but his response about your Weasley friend tells me that his issues were with him, not you."
Hermione didn't really think he was right but she chose not to respond as that wasn't the point of their discussion.
"The point," Tom corralled the conversation back to focus, "is that I already experienced jealousy over you and we had no relationship. It will only get worse, I know, after I've had a taste of what being with you will be like."
His confession was startling but hard to believe.
"How do you know that I won't be rubbish? How are you so certain that you won't just want someone else after a while?"
Scooting to where she now sat in the center of the couch, Tom put his arm behind her again. "I've seen my previous sexual submissives in public before. Our agreements only covered when I requested their presence and not the other times. I've seen them on dates with other wizards and then had sex with them the next night and it never bothered me to know what they did or who they did it with in between so long as I got what I wanted and so long as they didn't transmit anything to me from their other conquests."
This shocked Hermione. Tom wasn't celibate, he'd admitted but hearing him casually reference sex with witches who were dating other men was something that Hermione would never condone in a partner. The thought of Tom possessing her something akin to a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship only to take a different witch when she was not around sickened her. She pushed away from him again but his hand was around her back holding her in place.
"That's not what I want from you," he promised. "I know that you're different and that is how I know. I won't be with anyone but you and I don't want you with anyone but me."
"But," Hermione looked at him with blurry eyes. "You don't really want me as a girlfriend. You just...don't want anyone else to have me?"
The hand was in his hair again in frustration that was palpable. "I really don't know how to explain this. I have never had a girlfriend before. All I can tell you is that I want a relationship with you; a monogamous relationship between us in which we explore a sexual dom/sub experience that will benefit us both. I want to know that you're mine and that I'm the only one who you allow to have you in any aspect. We can work out the details as we go. Communication is key."
"And what if," Hermione licked her dry lips, "we can't find a balance between us that makes us both happy?"
A frown took over his face. "Well, you'd be free to leave anytime, I suppose, but that would be it. The vow would keep you from sharing these details. To your friends and family, we would be boyfriend and girlfriend and if you leave, it's going to be a break up to them."
She was sad suddenly at the realization that things couldn't be simple. "Why can't we actually be boyfriend and girlfriend?"
The hardened look was back on his face. "Because I'm incapable of love."
She blinked. He blinked. "How would you know that?"
There was a sigh. "I cannot tell you that."
"Ever?"
"Ever. You'll have to accept what I can offer you," Tom told her.
Swallowing thickly, Hermione asked, "But you'll treat me as a girlfriend? For outward appearances?"
"Yes."
"But it won't be real?"
"No."
She stood up and walked away from the couch, having to push on his arm to get him to release her. She stared out the window. Her heart ached at his revelations. She was already feeling more for him than she should. If she agreed to his terms, she was going to be hurt. Badly. What then?
On the other hand, she'd never wanted anything the way she wanted him. What if she went another 18 years without feeling this way? He had conditions and limits on what he was offering her. Could she accept them? She turned around to see him watching her warily.
With as much confidence as she could, she poured herself another glass of wine and took a few gulps as elegantly as she could.
"Okay, I accept your conditions for tonight with the option to discuss it again tomorrow."
"Okay?" his face was stone as he waited for reassurance.
"Yes, I want to be with you tonight," she confessed.
His face split into a grin.
"Where's that book?" she asked.