Remus grew more and more nervous all day, but after dinner, he, his dad, and Hazel all set off for the small barn Lyall had built when Remus was four. As Lyall stepped inside and began a series of complicated enchantments, Remus turned to Hazel. The weariness that lined his face was a massive change from the beautiful smiles he'd given her the day before. She draped her arms over his shoulders, giving him a kiss. "It's going to be okay," she promised. "I've got your dad here. We'll both be alright. He knows how to handle everything."
"You don't have to see me like this." It was a last-ditch effort to get her to turn around and go back to the relative safety of the house. He knew it wasn't going to work, but he had to try. "Hazel, you shouldn't have to see me like this."
"I want to," she said, gently running her hand down the side of his face.
Remus moved to kiss her knuckles, still trying to protest. "You - it's not nice to see. You're not going to like it."
"I want to know what I'm getting myself into. I already know how good and kind and sweet you are, but I want to know about this too, and this is the safest way to do it."
"Wait, back up a second. 'What you're getting into'?"
"We've been together for a while now, Rem," she explained, leaning in so their foreheads touched as they talked. "I can see us being together for a while more. I want to know about this too. Whatever happens tonight, you're still my big, strong, handsome wolf." She gave him a kiss before taking his hand and leading him into the barn. "C'mon, it's almost time." There was no turning back now.
He walked a little quicker than usual, buoyed by the thought that she could picture them together for… forever? Merlin, I'd be lucky. By the time they closed the door behind them, Lyall had finished half of the warding. "Hazel, over here with me. You have your wand just in case? Good. There are a couple of spells I need to put around the both of us. Give him one more hug. You won't be able to touch him after this."
Remus pulled her into his arms before Hazel got the chance to hug him first. Holding onto her tightly, he looked behind her, making pointed eye contact with his dad. Lyall nodded sharply. "You're going to be alright, Rem," she whispered, kissing his cheek before stepping back over to where his dad stood waiting. They started the complicated enchantment process, but soon enough, Lyall and Hazel were encased in protective bubbles that could only be dispelled by magic.
"Now we wait," Lyall said, checking his watch.
"Now we wait," Remus nodded, taking a deep breath.
"Now we wait. So… what does one talk about when they're waiting to transform?" Hazel asked. It made Remus smile a bit.
"Not much," Lyall said, checking his watch again. "We don't have very long now."
Sure enough, the moon had begun to rise. Hazel could see it through a carefully-crafted hole in the ceiling, a window they could look through to keep track of the moonrise. All three of them looked up at the silvery light of the full moon, Remus taking one more comforting look at Hazel and his dad. "I'm sorry you have to see -" He was cut off by a terrible snarling noise as his face lengthened, his shoulders hunching as he grew taller. He started to grow fur, his hands curling into paws with the most terrifying, razor-sharp claws Hazel had ever seen. Was this the last thing her dad had seen when he walked into that werewolf den? Or was it the glinting eyes, the full, blown pupils of a wolf that had scented its prey?
It only took a moment for Remus to be replaced by a massive wolf, more human than the average wolf would have been, but savage-looking in his own way. The wolf snarled again, advancing on them. This time there were two humans, something he wasn't used to. "Remember, he can't hurt you," Lyall whispered as Hazel instinctively stumbled backwards, nearly crashing into him. "We're completely safe in here."
Before the wolf reached them, Lyall took something out of the bag he'd brought with, throwing it to the opposite end of the barn. Lunging after the raw steak, the wolf left them alone as it devoured the treat. Soon he was back, claws flashing silver in the moonlight. Only satiated for a moment, he returned, hunting for more food. Lyall threw him another steak, the wolf catching it in his teeth before it hit the ground. "That's… amazing," Hazel whispered. "How much do you feed him?"
"I try to space it out so he doesn't go through the entire freezer in one night. No one can afford to feed a werewolf as much as it really needs. They'll keep eating until they're about to burst, or until they run out of prey," Lyall explained, sitting back in one of the old chairs he'd set up in a corner for them. "Have you learned about them in Defense Against the Dark Arts yet?"
Hazel nodded, her eyes still trained on the wolf. The blood dripping from his snout was no comfort. "In third year. And we reviewed them again for our O.W.L.s, but after Remus told me… I read everything I could find about them to… to even try to start to understand. I'm glad he has parents like you. Apparently a lot of werewolves get disowned, even if they're little kids."
"It was my fault." Lyall looked up at his son, saying, "I got in a fight with Fenrir Greyback. Surely you know who he is?"
"He's the one - well, they think - the one who killed my dad. And a lot of other people. He's who Dad was after."
"Greyback is a monster of a human. He went after Remus when he was little. Better to hurt the son to punish the father, or so he claimed. So every full moon I come out here, and it always makes me wonder if… if I had done something differently, if I had warded the house better, if I hadn't been so foolish… if Remus would be a normal boy," he sighed. "If only."
Before Hazel could answer, the wolf approached them cautiously, sniffing around. He'd sighted the new human, the one he didn't see every month. She smelled interesting. He'd smelled her before, but he didn't know where. This one didn't throw him meat. Was this one meant to be prey, brought by the other one who seemingly always brought treats along when they were out in the barn? He raised his claws, pawing at the bubble around them. Hazel jumped back, but quickly stopped herself. "Remus? Rem, it's me." She swallowed the knot that was forming in her throat, stepping as close as she dared, less than an arm's length away from the claws. "Hi Rem," she tried to smile, locking eyes with the werewolf. "Don't worry, your dad and I are right here. You're gonna be fine." The wolf snarled, but it took a couple of steps back from them.
"Just luck," Lyall commented as she came to sit down next to him. "Werewolves don't recognize people. I've trained him enough to know that I bring food, but he'll still try to attack me sometimes if he's desperate."
"Remus! No!" The wolf was trying to claw at itself, Hazel's voice making it look up and stop for the briefest of seconds. "Rem, please don't!"
Lyall sighed, telling her that, "This is the worst part. One of the worst parts. We can't stop it. There's no way to stop it."
"Can't you immobilize him or something?" she practically begged as the wolf raised a silver claw to its shoulder, licking off the blood despite its whimpering.
"I tried when he was little. It never works for long, and he's even angrier when the spell wears off. We agreed that it's better this way, even if it doesn't seem like it."
So they sat and watched, Hazel trying to distract him to no avail. No matter what she tried, he would still claw at himself, opening up old wounds or creating new ones. By the time the sun started to rise, Hazel was exhausted. She could see why the other Marauders slept so much after full moons. Even if they weren't tearing themselves apart, it was a lot of work trying to distract a werewolf, trying to keep it from hurting itself. As the moon set and the sun rose, the wolf in front of them suddenly stopped circling around the barn. Its claws retracted, the fur starting to disappear. The snout and the sharp teeth shrunk back into a normal nose as he shrunk back to normal height. Remus collapsed onto the barn floor, covered in bloody scratches. "Rem-"
"Wait," Lyall instructed, waving his wand over the two of them. "Finite Incantatem." The warding around them and around the barn broke, fizzling out in a flash of golden light. With another wave of his wand Remus was wrapped up in a dressing gown, Lyall and Hazel helping him to his feet.
"Hey," Remus winced, blood dripping from his lip as he slung an arm over her shoulders. "I'd kiss you good morning, but something tells me you wouldn't like that."
"Good morning," Hazel smiled, glad he was back to normal. She kissed his cheek, trying to find a spot that wasn't too covered in blood, sweat, and dirt. "Come on, let's get you inside."