"I wanted to be a hero."

Those were the words that started it all, ever since that day. The day the old him died within the flames that scorched everything that he was. Leaving but an empty body closer to a corpse despite still living.

Even when saved by that man, he still felt nothing at all. He just lived, and while being with his savior brought forth some form of function, the boy lacked a purpose. Wishing for something to bring him joy, to make him feel fulfilled in his life. Then, on that night before his father died, he heard those words.

"I wanted to be a hero." It was then the boy felt it, a purpose. Something in him came to life, as he heard his late father's wish. Then, with a promise he told his father what he wished to do. With a smile his father accepted his words, and then like so with a smile he died causing the boy sadness. Even so, the boy vowed to keep his father's wish alive through him, and while it wouldn't be easy he'd try either way.

Using what little knowledge he had to attain strength. To be a Hero of Justice and save others from those who would do evil. Hoping that he could accomplish his father's dream.

With that, Shirou Emiya took a step forward to move towards his dream.

"..." Shirou was in one of the rooms in the Matou home, looking at a wall blankly. Not doing anything in particular, and didn't even seem mad or happy. Just emotionless while nearby, a small little clock on the wall could be heard. As it ticked, Shirou then looked at the place where one of his arms used to be, then at his other hand. He then looked down at himself, then looked back at the wall.

"Grah!" He then got up, traced a wooden sword, and threw it at the clock destroying it before falling to his knees. The sword vanishing away while Shirou's face contorted in a combination of anger and regret.

"Again." He said to himself. "Again!" Time and time again, Shirou failed. Time and time again, Shirou failed at doing what he tried to be. A Hero of Justice, that protected others-what a joke! He couldn't even protect himself let aside those he actually cared about.

Memories of the promise he made with his father, now felt like a joke. Mocked by how he kept getting beaten up, knocked out, and outright failing in even doing anything noteworthy since this damn war even started. All he got were broken bones since this entire thing began with an arm missing later on. Yes logic said that a mediocre Master like him shouldn't have expected anything, yet right now, Shirou screwed logic away as logic didn't help stop how his emotions were acting out.

Shirou stumbled toward the wall and leaned on it while slamming his fist against it. Both in anger and defeat at how badly things were going. He lost an arm, Ozpin was dead, and apparently a bunch of Grimm were now out and killing people. Shirou woke up about thirty minutes ago, was told what happened, and then just went into the room to think.

'You fool!' Think at how pathetic he had been. 'I tried my best. Thinking I could help people out. Thinking that maybe, just maybe…I could help.'

But this war time and again kept proving Shirou wrong. How he couldn't even do anything to help those who aided him. The favors they gave him went unreturned as Shirou was unable to help them out. The dream he promised his father he would fulfill, just going unfulfilled.

"No matter what I do…I just fail." Shirou said as he shut his eyes. While he didn't cry, a part of him certainly felt like crying. To let loose after all the decisions that have led him to apparently nowhere. Where now, his city is in trouble and as much as Shirou wanted to help out, the dark question inside him asked, could he even do it? Shirou was afraid of the answer. After a bit, Shirou sighed and walked back to the bed and sat down. Not sure what to even do now. Other than nothing he supposed as Shirou then resumed staring at the wall.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Shirou then lifted his head toward the door, looking at where the noise originated from.

Slam!

The door then fell down as Saber came in, not looking any regretful for destroying the door. Stepping inside the room with an innocent smile on her face while in her hands, she had a bowl full of udon. She then walked casually towards Shirou like she had no care in the world, and then sat next to him. Shirou blinked at what she was even doing. Saber then looked at him, then at the bowl in her hands. She then lifted it, with Shirou wondering if she was offering it to him.

Slurp.

That thought was then thrown as Saber began eating the udon herself. Now focused on her food than anything else, and ate right away. The absurdity of it all naturally caused Shirou to open his mouth and say, "Huh?"

Saber stopped eating and put the bowl back on her lap. "Oh. Finally talking, huh." She then said while smiling at him. "Thought for sure you were going to stay silent as some kind of rebellion."

Shirou's mouth fell a little, not knowing what to say. Though before he even could, Saber spoke again. "Still," She resumed. "I'm glad to see you can talk and aren't just withdrawing yourself after what happened."

Shirou then shut his mouth, and gritted his teeth. His hand shaking as his eyes narrowed. "Do you even know what you're saying?"

"Yeah I do." Saber said to Shirou. "How you're mad about all the stuff that's been happening."

"And yet you seem to think I'd get over it like a child losing a simple toy." Shirou then glared at Saber. Angry how Saber seems to be treating the situation like it wasn't anything important at all. Like everything that occurred was something normal and not at all important, pissing him off. Of course Shirou knew trying to blame Saber was cruel and unwanted, but his emotions were running wild a bit and he needed to lash out.

Oddly, despite his words and tone, Saber didn't look at all offended. Instead, she still smiled while adjusting herself before she spoke to Shirou. "I do. And if I'm being honest, this type of thing isn't all that new to me."

Shirou gaped at what his Servant just said. Though before he could reply, Saber continued on. "Now, I'm not saying this because I'm trying to be mean or anything." She told him. "But the thing is, I've seen and heard of death before, where I'm from and throughout my travels." Shirou then stayed silent, as realization came to him.

'Oh…that's right.' Saber, his Servant, is Musashi after all. A powerful swordsman who traveled across Japan, and met many foes. Including killing them, as history says. With history also stating of the blood spilled by Musashi, with the woman herself not even denying it.

"I don't really consider myself a villain if I'm being honest," Musashi told Shirou while giggling a bit. "But to be called a hero? Hehe. Well, while I don't mind the title, I'm not sure I fit it by modern standards." Especially since Musashi never even cared for being a hero. Instead, she just wanted to have a good fight and battle strong people. Nothing more than that. "Besides, I never really managed to be a hero up until I met her."

"Her?" Shirou then found himself asking, a bit of curiosity now affecting him. Something Musashi was glad to answer.

"Yeah, her." Musashi then said with a very fond expression. "It was during one of my…travels, I guess. Where I met a certain girl who was super cute." A lover? Shirou did read once that Musashi did have conflict between choosing the blade or a lover, while also having love interests. Maybe this girl was from his past.

"Anyway, she wasn't anything special to be honest." Musashi then gave her thoughts on the girl she met. "She wasn't particularly strong, or smart, actually, she was really mediocre." Even as she said such words, Shirou noticed how more excited Saber was getting as she kept going. "But even so, despite not being powerful, she had a strong sense of justice."

She was nobody special at all. Yet Musashi saw just how pure she was, as she went to try and help people out. Helping them when it didn't even benefit her, let aside getting paid for it with risk of her dying. But she did it anyway, with Musashi watching in awe.

"Yeah. I won't lie. If it had been me, I'd have probably let people die to those monsters." Musashi then commented her past a bit, with Shirou listening closely now at what he was hearing. "Sure I wouldn't have felt good, but I'd have run without looking back. But when I saw her trying to help out…I guess something in me switched on."

Musashi chuckled. She wasn't some evil psychopath, but she was far from a hero as she would leave people to die. Even so, that girl refused to do such a thing and managed to inspire Musashi that maybe she could do the same. Finding herself feeling good when she actually used her sword skill to help those who were about to be slaughtered.

"Heh. That girl was really something Master. In fact," Musashi then looked at Shirou. "She actually reminds me of you."

"Me?"

"Pretty much." Musashi giggled. "Actually, you kinda look like her brother or something." It was why when she first came to this world, she was briefly confused when she saw Shirou. For a moment, wondering if he had been that girl. Granted that possibility was dissuaded considering Shirou's a boy, but the fact is he did have some traits like the girl. Such as wanting to help people despite lacking power.

"Master," Musashi then leaned back. "I can see why you're upset. Unlike the girl I knew, who succeeded in saving the people in that Singularity, so far you have failed. Even though both of you aren't all that different."

Yes, those two, Shirou and the girl, were very alike. Sure they had some differences, overall though they both held similarities such as the fact that both lacked true power to face their enemies head-on, and were more-or-less normal humans. Yet where that girl managed to succeed in her goals, despite not even trying to be a hero, Shirou himself hadn't succeeded at all. Similar yet different, and naturally human nature stated that humans didn't like failure. Especially when it came to their dreams and goals.

Shirou grunted a bit, but regret could be seen in his eyes. Knowing what Musashi said is true about his losses in this war. Didn't help that this supposed girl managed to gain victory in spite of the fact that she was considered similar to him.

"Though that makes me want to ask, will you give up?" Musashi then asked Shirou this who then opened his mouth to answer. However, no words came out of him as Shirou stopped himself. A conundrum within him started, as despite wanting to say no for a split second his mind nearly said yes.

"Conflicted, right." Musashi then said as she gazed at Shirou deeply. "I can see why. After all, when one experiences defeat many times in the path they've taken, it makes a person question if they should just leave that path for another."

Humans, after all, desire not losses, but wins in their eyes. As such when humans grow, they choose a path they think they might excel in. While naturally some humans do succeed, others are not as lucky and may face set-backs to outright walls to their desires and face defeat. Thus humans are then met with a choice. To continue on this path and try and meet their goal no matter how tough it is, or, go on another path. There wasn't anything wrong with either choice. Why, some might actually find satisfaction in the new path they took. Yet if one gives up too soon on the path they originally took, then just maybe they'll lose it all and face nothing but regret.

Shirou wanted to deny Musashi's words, but he knew they were true. Right now, he was faced with a conflicting decision. To continue on fighting and likely just face more loss, or give up now and likely survive.

'But if I give up, then what have I even been fighting for?' Shirou then had to ask himself. The question and answer of what would occur if he gave up now. To leave this war.

Just thinking it made him sick.

"If you want to drop out, I won't stop you." Saber then told Shirou as he continued swimming in his thoughts. "Heck, I can even get you out of this city, especially since those Grimm are about to escape, and nobody would blame you."

"Blame me?" Shirou asked.

"Yeah, blame you." Saber repeated as she then began eating a bit of her udon before it went cold. "I mean, like I said before, you aren't all that tough and this war showed you the consequences of it." Her left finger then pointed at Shirou's lack of an arm. "Heck, if you give up right now, some would say you're making the sane decision."

After all, what kind of normal person would continue fighting in a war that can get them killed. This was especially different from actual wars, as in this one, Shirou could leave right now and not worry about getting shot in a battlefield when he leaves. A chance to escape with his life intact, and not worry about meeting his end at a blade or some other weapon against a Servant.

Yes. This is indeed Shirou's chance to end his participation in the Holy Grail War. As one might say, leave to live another day. After all, how can anybody do anything if they die an early grave. By escaping, Shirou can survive and maybe even continue his dream somewhere else.

"..."

"I wanted to be a hero."

"Master. Your answer?" Musashi asked as she finally finished her bowl.

Shirou sat up straight, and then said one thing. "No." He then looked at Musashi with a confirmed resolve in his eyes. "I won't drop out."

Musashi grinned. "Well then that's a relief." She put the bowl on the stand. "I was kinda worried you would actually quit." Oh sure Saber would have indeed taken him to safety. Get him out of this city to ensure he survived. But that would have beena boring way his story would have ended, no?

"That's right. I can't give up. Not yet." Memories of the war, while short but memorable, came to Shirou's mind. "I participated for a reason, and I was helped by others. Leaving now may as well be an insult to those things." Shirou had indeed wavered, and chances are he might actually indeed face absolute defeat later. Yet he didn't regret this choice, and Shirou knew what he was going to do. "You mentioned that Grimm are coming?"

"A whole lot from Caster's temple." Musashi had no idea what even happened. If this was Caster's plan, or if she just lost control over the Grimm. All she knew was that after Zouken left, some minutes later a giant Wyvern burst from the mountain while she was putting Shirou in his room and screeches came out.

"Got it." Shirou tightened his fist. "Then I guess I know what I'm going to do."

"Good. Because if you didn't, I would have killed you." Shirou then turned to see that outside the room, Rin was there with Archer nearby who was leaning on the wall while Rin gave a slight smirk with a hand on her hip. "Honestly Emiya, you had me worried for a bit." Thinking about quitting this war, that definitely caught Rin by surprise. Especially seeing as Emiya was always wanting to continue the fight. "Had you indeed tried to lose, I'd have had to memory wipe you. Or as Archer suggested, well..."

Archer made a smug grin and then threw a projected dagger near Shirou. The teen was not pleased by the implications there.

Still, in spite of that threat Shirou chuckled. "Glad I didn't disappoint."

Rin lightly blushed but kept her expression still while then turning. "Then you better get ready and tell me what your little plan is. Because otherwise I might leave out of boredom and figure this out myself."

"And what would your plan be then?" Musashi teased with Rin growling.

"Don't worry, I will." Shirou scratched his chin a bit. "Although, where's Shi-"

"Alright everyone, I got the stuff ready." Shinji then appeared with some back-packs. "I got food, water, rations, and of course some passports with money." Shinji then dropped the bags. "I hope you're all excited to see Hawaii!"

Shirou had no idea what Shinji was talking about, but was glad to see him either way. "Great Shinji." he said as he looked at the bags. "You brought the stuff needed to travel around when we go to the city to kill the Grimm."

"Obviously." Shinji smugly said. "I mean, with things getting so bad someone had to-hold up, go to the city?"

"Of course, Matou." Rin chuckled sinisterly. "Emiya, as a decent magus as he is, has decided to continue the fight with Saber and of course I agree with him." She then stepped forward. "Why, what did you think?"

Shinji sputtered a bit, having not seen this coming at all. He thought for sure Shirou would quit after all this. Shinji knew he did, and yet Shirou still wanted to fight. Granted, Shinji still had a chance and the Grimm were still a long while from hitting here and even the airport. There might even be some taxis around still.

'But if I leave, I'd look like a wimp.' So, with great regret and hopes that this won't end as badly as he thinks, Shinji then says, "O-Of course I'm going to stay." Shinji hid the passports. "Like I'd leave my buddy with this crass girl."

"This crass girl can end you." Rin threatened Shinji who scoffed.

"Sure, you can. With what? Those stupid twin tails?" Rin began considering just working with Shirou after strangling Matou with her so-called 'stupid' twin tails. Or maybe have Archer get out a spear, and shove it down his ass-

"Okay," Shirou saw where this was headed and decided to stop it. "Moving on, we have some stuff to do. And we should get ready before things get worse." A howl could then be heard followed by an explosion across the city. "...much worse."

"The apocalypse is already happening." Shinji pointed out as one could see some smoke across the city from the window in the room. Clearly the Grimm out there were already getting started. "At this rate, this city is about to be full of those things."

"Plus, I doubt some fool missing an arm can handle such things." Archer turned toward Shirou with a heavy look. "I overheard your words, but can you back it up?"

"I guess we're about to find out." Shirou said with determination. "Right Saber."

"Hell yeah!" The Servant agreed. "Let's cut some Grimm up!"

Everybody else seemed to agree, and all looked ready.

This battle wouldn't be easy. The difficulties have also gone up. Not to mention the loss of Ozpin still affected Shirou along with lingering doubts if he could even do this. However, he can't hesitate. No now. Fuyuki was in trouble, and it needed those who were willing to help it out. To protect the people from the Grimm. Ozpin said the Grimm were coming from the temple, where the source might be. That's where Shirou needed to go.

If he wants to end all this suffering, then it is best to head toward Ryuudou Temple to kill the source. He only just hoped things couldn't get worse. Knowing his luck though, it probably will.

"Squeak!" Shirou then looked down and saw Berserker. It's eyes, while maddened and still a bit scary, there seemed to be intention in there. Illya.

'I failed you Ozpin...and I'm sorry.' Shirou thought as he knelt down and stuck out his hand. Berserker then crawling on it. 'But I'll finish what you started, and save Illya.' Resolve can be seen in Shirou as he knew what to do. 'That I promise.'

Anybody who thought Shirou would quit, then they must have been seeing things. Like heck Shirou will give up. Sure, his losses have affected his thoughts on how a Hero should win, but at least he isn't giving up.

Thankfully, Rin and Archer will be with him soon. It'll be needed as the Grimm start to strike against Fuyuki. Hopefully things won't get too bad later on…Yeah right. With Kotomine, Gilgamesh, Sakura and Zouken around, things can always get nasty. But hey, at least Shirou has friends with him to help out.

EDIT CHANGE: I got word of my mistake on Illya, and the kidnapping scene. I apologize for that and have changed it to Rin. Thanks for telling me this.