I don't have time to reply to everybody this time 'round, but thanks so much for the reviews! My bunnies are feeling well-fed for the moment.
:P
a golden starfish- I don't know exactly how long it will be- since I don't divide it up into chapters while I write, but I'm guessing (if I keep up with the same chapter-lengths I have right now)… around twenty chapters, maybe?

-- Aaaand here we go.
(8)

.

Somehow I managed to get to my quarters. How I did this, I'm not entirely sure, because I kind of blanked out. I only remembered the need to get away.

Away from the goddamn memories, away from Charlie, away from Billy Joel, and away from my dead father.

Stumbling into the bathroom adjacent to my room, I collapsed in front of the Ancient toilet, immediately heaving out what little contents I'd had in my stomach. I remained there for a long time, gagging painfully whenever my father's wasting face reared up in my mind.

His voice… I rested the side of my face against the lid, breathing heavily and way too tired to care about the germs. His voice was how I remembered it, but it… it wasn't him, it was dead and wrong.

"McKay?"

I didn't hear the door open, was all I could think.

"Rodney, are you in here?" John tried again.

"Go away." I ordered, my voice echoing back at me; wincing when I realized how pathetic it sounded.

After a moment, I heard him in the threshold of the bathroom, "Zelenka said you left the cafeteria in quite a hurry."

I lifted my head, turning it in the other direction so I was looking at him, before dropping it down again. "What is it about 'go away' that you don't get?"

I must've looked quite dreadful, because once Sheppard saw my face, his arms uncrossed and he exclaimed with a horrified expression, "Holy shit, McKay! I just-- When was the last time you slept?"

I thought, but couldn't come up with the answer.

He glanced at the floor, "Is that blood?"

I followed his gaze curiously, eyes falling onto the hard bathroom floor next to me, covered in red liquid. "Oh. No, that's Athosian juice." I must've dragged it in with me from the cafeteria, I realized in a disconnected sort of way.

John opened his mouth to ask a question, but closed it with a loud snap instead, coming forward and grabbing one of my limp arms, hauling me up to my feet. "You're going to bed now."

"What?" I managed to pull away from him, nearly slipping in the juice. "Sleep isn't going to help!" I said, breaking out of my stupor and quickly becoming angry, "Didn't I ask you to leave? Wait, no -- you just barged in here and --"

"McKay, I'm trying to help you!" he interrupted almost pleadingly.

"I… I just need to think, okay!" My world seemed to be falling apart. I shouldn't be seeing and hearing things that aren't real! I shouldn't be reliving random memories for no reason! I'm not crazy!

…Am I?

I shook my head furiously, I didn't have time for those kinds of thoughts. Of course I'm not crazy. I'm just -- just… I… And it killed me that I couldn't come up with a logical explanation.

"Leave me alone and let me think!" I ordered furiously, refusing to go any further down that line of thought; pushing past him and walking to the door that leads into my quarters. I pressed my hand against the pad, turning back to face John, who was watching me sadly. "Look, I even opened the door for you. Now get out!"

He didn't move.

"Rodney, I know you can't… " He bit his lip in frustration before continuing, "You just need to take a break from everything. Really, maybe…. maybe that'll help?"

I took my hand away from the pad, letting the door slide shut. I pointed a finger at him, "Listen to me. Fucking sleep will not help, okay? I've gone longer with no sleep and never seen…" I stumbled, my father's face coming back anew. I unconsciously shook my head, trying to dislodge the horrifying image, "Never seen things I shouldn't see! This is not because of sleep problems! Everyone needs to stop saying I need fucking sleep!"

He held up his hands in defeat, "Okay, okay! You don't have to if you don't want to."

I closed my eyes, breathing deeply through the nose in an effort to compose myself. I could feel my heart racing, and I had a slight tremor going through the hand pointing the finger, which also happened to be my bandaged one. I dropped the hand and opened my eyes once I'd determined I was calm enough to speak again, "Good. Now, if you would." I waved towards the door.

John looked pained, still rooted to the spot. "Rodney, I think I should tell you -- "

He was interrupted by a sudden and loud alarm, making us both jump in surprise.

"What? What's that for?" I asked loudly over the noise, my anger dissipating as curiosity and anxiousness overcame it. "That's not the alarm for an incoming wormhole, is it?"

"No, it's different," he agreed over the noise, "we should head to the control room!"

I nodded, but called, "Stop!" when he started towards me. "Could you hand me that?" I pointed towards my bedside table.

His eyebrows knit together in confusion, but he turned. "Oh." He grabbed it and tossed it to me.

I slipped the radio over my ear, "Right, let's go."

-

-

No sooner had I turned on the radio when I heard Weir's voice in my ear, demanding that I answer her, and that I'd better be on my way to the control room.

"Yeah, I'm here." I replied once she'd stopped to get some air, with Sheppard next to me as we swiftly made our way towards a transporter. Using the collar of my jacket to wipe some gathered sweat from my forehead, I attempted to focus on the present situation and forget about what had happened in the mess hall and the subsequent scene with Sheppard in my quarters.

I heard her sigh of relief over the radio before, "We've got a problem."

I rolled my eyes; the alarm still ringing through the halls. "Yeah, I guessed." I dropped the collar. "What is it?"

"Atlantis…" she trailed off, then, obviously speaking to Grodin, "Could you kill the noise, please?"

"Elizabeth, you're going to have to be a little more specific." I said impatiently, reaching the transporter. Sheppard pressed on the map for the control room. "I'm smart but that's a bit vague for even me."

"Sorry." The alarms abruptly shutdown. "Atlantis is being attacked."

Oh no. I blew air harshly out through clenched teeth as my eyes slid shut. After a moment, I managed to inquire softly, "Wraith?"

John's head turned sharply in my direction.

"No." Elizabeth answered quickly, "Not Wraith."

My eyes flew open again in surprise. "Really?"

"Right. Um. I'm being told… that there's… whales." she paused, then, "Attacking us, that is."

"What?" I glanced up at John while saying to Elizabeth, "Mind repeating that?"

Another pause. Then: "Whales Rodney. Giant whales are destroying an Eastern part of the city."

As my mind tried to grapple with the fact that the Wraith weren't swarming our planet, and that our main fear was giant whales at the moment-- the transporter door's slid open, revealing the control room.

Weir and Teyla were both watching as Grodin typed madly at the computers with personnel running around them, looking panicked.

Spotting us in the transporter, Elizabeth waved us both over. "Put it on screen, Peter." she said as we neared, with Grodin immediately complying.

"See here?" Peter said as a map of the city flickered onto the large screen. It showed a group of white dots converging on the Eastern pier, running into the city walls repeatedly, creating enormous waves and actually succeeding in breaking huge chunks of the city off. "Dots are the whales." he explained unnecessarily.

"Yeah, got that." Sheppard said, an eyebrow lifting. "What I want to know is, why?"

"Why are the whales attacking us?"

"Bales." I corrected without thinking about it, suddenly connecting these creatures with the ones I'd seen earlier, which I really should have done the very moment I'd heard 'whales'-- but I allowed myself some slack because of the extenuating circumstances.

Sheppard turned, asking incredulously, "Excuse me?"

"Um." I floundered for a second, not particularly wanting to reveal that the Bales and I had a previous relationship- you never knew what Sheppard was going to mock you for. "We saw a pack of them this morning." I told him, waving over at Teyla, who nodded in confirmation. "They were swimming around outside the mess hall balcony…" I went on, looking back at the map, "Probability suggests this is the same group."

"Hm." Sheppard acknowledged with a nod, but it seemed he couldn't help himself from commenting on their titles, because he asked in a pained voice, "But why 'Bales' man?"

"Hey." I held up my hands, "Wasn't me."

"Was Ford with you?"

"Gentlemen." Weir ground out in obvious annoyance. "Try and focus on the situation."

"Sorry." I said, slightly abashed. Sheppard just gave her a smirk with an accompanied shrug, which he obviously thought was endearing. "Back to the Major's earlier question…" I said, managing to resist the urge to roll my eyes, "Why?"

"It does not make sense that the Bales would attack the pier for no reason." Teyla pointed out reasonably.

I saw Sheppard wince at her usage of 'Bales' but, in an effort to stay on track, he only said, "Could something be hurting them over there?"

"Or might their be something that they're attracted to?" Elizabeth offered.

Apparently, it clicked in Grodin's head at the same moment as mine.

"The Naquadah generator." we both said in sudden understanding.

"There's nothing else--"

"That's got to be--"

Elizabeth held up her hands in exasperation, "Wait, wait. Explain. The Bales want the generator?"

I shrugged. "It's the only thing that makes sense. That generator is the one located closest to the ocean. And, if you all remember, when we first got here, the Eastern pier was somewhat submerged--"

"Right." Elizabeth confirmed, forehead wrinkled in remembrance.

"Well, refreshing your memories; in order to fix it, I had to connect that generator into Atlantis' actual wiring." When that amazing statement got no reaction, I went on with raised eyebrows, "Incredibly complicated stuff… caused quite a controversy between myself and Hayes little group…" They all stared back at me blankly. "Am I ringing any bells here?"

Sheppard gave me a sidelong glance, saying, "Imagine you are."

"You're kidding me!" I said with exasperation, but after looking at each of them in turn and still getting that look, I realized they weren't. "I was public enemy number one with the rest of the science team for weeks after that- and you're telling me none of you even remember?"

Elizabeth gently massaged her temple, saying into her hand, "Forgive me Rodney, but those were some busy weeks."

I 'harrumphed' in discontent but, for the sake of her headache, decided to move on. For now. "Anyway, it might just be that the power from the generator is affecting the water, and the Bales sense it." Turning to Grodin I told him, "Just turn off that generator, and they'll probably go away."

"Like the energy being, back when you had the personal shield." Sheppard stated lightly.

"Kind of." I replied, watching as Grodin started typing in the proper commands, "Only this time we just have to turn off the one generator. And we don't have to keep the Bales going in circles. And they should go away by themselves…" I glanced up at Sheppard then, telling him frankly, "Actually, it's nothing like the energy being."

From his self-deprecating grin, I guessed that he agreed.

"It's not working." Grodin announced a moment later, sounding particularly frustrated.

"What?" I asked sharply, focusing my gaze down at him again.

"The codes…" He typed some more before looking up at all of us, "They aren't making it through! The whale- uh, or Bales did you say?"

"Grodin!" Weir snapped.

He winced, "Sorry. Um, they must have destroyed the equipment necessary for a remote shut-down."

"And this means…?" Teyla started questioningly.

"That it's going to have to be shutdown manually." Elizabeth finished, looking between Sheppard and myself as she said it.

"Not an easy task." I informed them grimly, "That generator is connected so tightly into the system… it might as well be another wall."

"Okay." Sheppard said, clapping his hands together pointlessly; he already had everyone's attention. "McKay will tell me what to do, and I'll head on down there--"

Snorting with repressed laughter, I stared up at the ceiling, asking, "My God, do you even listen when I talk?" Lowering my gaze to settle on the Major I informed him, "Sorry, that's not going to work."

Sheppard's look darkened as he asked, "Why?"

"Because it's much too complicated to even explain to you!" I exclaimed, trying to imagine Sheppard understanding the inner-mechanics of the Naquadah generator. Ridiculous, really. "Let alone for you to actually do it." I sighed heavily, "No, it'll have to be me."

Sheppard was already shaking his head, "No. Not after…" he trailed off, but I could guess the gist of what he was going to say. He was clearly disturbed about finding me in my quarters earlier in that state, and though I'd managed to forget it for a little, the whole zombie-father thing came rushing back anew. "Just-- no, I'll take Peter…" he said, and Grodin started to rise helpfully from his chair, before I placed my hand on his shoulder and pushed him back down. "… or Zelenka." Sheppard finished, raising an eyebrow.

"What?" Did he think I couldn't handle it? "I can do it!" I insisted angrily at his doubtful look, repressing the image of my father as best I could. "Besides, there's no one else here that can even disconnect the thing. No offense, Peter."

"None tak--"

"Really," I went on, speaking to John, "Zelenka might give it a run for it's money, but--"

"McKay…" Sheppard said tiredly, shaking his head.-- and then he did the most curious thing. He looked down at my neck.

"Um," I raised an eyebrow uncertainly, "Major?"

"Whoever's doing it needs to do it soon." Peter spoke up from his chair, distracting me, "The… uh, 'Bales' are destroying those walls rather quickly."

"See?" I told Sheppard, who was looking back up at my face now, "We don't have time for me to explain the procedure to you."

"He's right John." Elizabeth said from her position next to Teyla, "We don't have time for this. Take a team with him and go. Just… keep radio contact."

I looked over at her disdainfully, "A team would just get in my way, and I'm sure Sheppard will do a decent job at that himself." The Major sighed at the remark, but I continued, "Please don't make him bring a group along to help."

She smiled wryly, "All right."

"But I will accompany you." Teyla said, stepping forward.

John looked surprised, which, in turn, surprised me. Why would he be surprised that Teyla wanted to come? "Really?" Sheppard asked.

"Only because Aiden can't join you." she said, and if I didn't know better, I'd think she sounded annoyed.

Remembering how the Lieutenant had been limping after that training session with Sheppard, I asked, "Oh, is he still with Carson?" I looked over at John, "You really did a number on him."

He glanced down at his hands before meeting my eyes, "Yeah, I guess so."

BWEET BWEET BWEET

We all jumped in surprise at the sudden, and not to mention, loud noise.

"It's the alarm." Grodin explained quickly, pressing buttons and silencing the racket. "Bales set it off again." he said apologetically.

Weir looked over at us, raising her eyebrows.

"Going." I told her, already turning and heading off for the transporter, knowing Teyla and Sheppard were following close behind.

---

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tbc