I adopted this plot bunny a year or so ago. It really intrigued me. I posted a poll in my group asking which story I should work on next, and this was the winner. It's definitely a WIP. I've only got a rough outline figured out and I'm going back to my roots with this … writing with a vague plan. I hope that I can do this justice.

None of this is mine … I wish it was. Sigh …

Now, I'm well aware that Los Angeles and San Francisco are both in California. However, they are on opposite extremes. Essentially, a state away … Even though I live in Chicago, I feel like Carbondale, on the southern extreme of Illinois, is a state away as well. I'm not stupid.

Up next will be Edward's date with Bella. Where do you think they'll go? Bella is also going to return to San Francisco. How soon do you think it'll be until Edward follows her? And what about those emails that were sent to Alice?

This chapter is dedicated to Grandmachix …

Chapter Fifteen

Bella

Waking up the following morning, I was curled on my side. There was a heavy arm around my waist, along with a strong body pressed to my back. I shifted, becoming more aware. I was in bed and then, I remembered. Edward slept with me. He held me gently, keeping me pressed to his side. I opened my eyes, grinning widely when I saw Edward's tattooed arm holding me close to his body. I idly traced the black swirls on his skin.

"That tickles," Edward murmured, his voice deep with sleep.

"Sorry," I giggled. "I was just examining your tattoo. It's so pretty."

"I didn't get it to be pretty," he snickered, drawing me closer to his muscular body and kissing my neck. "I got it as a form of self-expression."

"Well, that may be the case, but the details are pretty, but masculine," I said. "Why did you add the armor around your family's crest?"

"In order to be in this industry, you have to have some pretty thick skin. There were times when I felt pretty exposed, even when I was composed outwardly," he explained. "When rumors are flying about you and about your relationships, it's hard to ignore it. But, you learn quickly to avoid the rag magazines and the tabloids. My publicist handles that, along with my legal team."

"Alice took care of your public image?" I asked.

"She was one facet of my team. Now, Felix, my new attorney, is working with my publicist. I recommend you hire one as well," Edward suggested.

"An attorney or publicist?"

"Both," he answered honestly.

"I do have an attorney through the publishing house. I've handled all my public relations on my own, or with Jasper's help," I said.

"With the movie, you might want to hire a publicist to help organize any interviews and publicity for the movie," Edward suggested. "I could have my publicist help out. He's amazing."

"Is he local to Los Angeles?"

"He is, but he's got clients all over the world," Edward smiled. "Jared likes to travel."

"I'll think about it, but you promised a day of no work," I quipped, turning in his arms, and brushing my fingers through his messy locks.

"I wouldn't mind staying in bed with you," he purred, pulling me closer to his body. "I like this. Waking up with you. Holding you."

"I think I got the best night's sleep in your arms," I said, blushing furiously. "Well, the first night in a long time." I traced my fingers along the edge of his sleep shirt. I could see some more ink against his skin, just hiding beneath his shirt. It was a quote. "What does this say?"

"It's a variation of a quote," Edward explained, as he pulled down the neckline of his shirt. "'If you don't live … for something/ You will die … for nothing.' I knew that being an actor was an empty existence. I was very comfortable in my life, but I had no joy. I only found true happiness when I began directing. I got this tattoo after the one on my arm."

I traced the letters, grinning when his skin pebbled with goosebumps. "I like that … the quote," I murmured. "It's right above your heart."

"I followed my heart to change my career focus," he shrugged. He kissed my nose before he cuddled around me. "We should get up. We have a full day planned." He tightened his arm, brushing his lips along my pulse point. "I'm going to shower in the guest room. Remember, casual and comfortable, love."

I pressed my head above his heart, listening to the steady thrum. He chuckled before slipping out of bed. I pouted, pulling his pillow into my arms. His chuckle turned into a full laugh as he kissed my lips before he left the bedroom, closing the door with a soft click. With a sigh, I slid out of the bed and padded to the bathroom. I washed my face and brushed my teeth before getting into the shower.

Dressing in a pair of shorts and a tank top, I applied some light makeup and braided my hair, draping it over my shoulder. "Edward?" I called.

He poked his head in the bedroom. His evergreen gaze swept over my body, and I blushed. "What is it, Bella?"

"Are we going outside?" I asked.

"All day," he smirked. "Put on sunscreen, gorgeous." He started to back away, but smiled crookedly at me. "Also, you don't need your wallet or handbag or whatever."

I snorted. "Handbag? Are you an old lady?" I teased.

"I don't know what they're called," he laughed. "I should, but I don't. Anyway, you don't need to worry about paying for a thing."

"Edward," I frowned.

"Let me spoil you, gorgeous," Edward smirked. "Besides, where we're going, handbags just get in the way." I arched a brow at him. "Patience, Bella."

"While we're on this adventure, what will Jasper do?" I asked.

"He left a note, explaining that he was going to go surfing and then exploring. Marcus was meeting him at the beach," Edward explained.

"Oh, okay," I nodded. "I'll be down in a little bit. I'm going to cover my fish-belly skin with SPF." Edward gave me a gorgeously crooked smile, ducking out of his bedroom. I found the sunscreen and covered my legs, arms, and face with the lotion. I sprayed some body spray and picked up a pair of sneakers from my bag. I held those in my hand while I stuffed my cell phone and some cash into my pocket. I didn't want to be completely reliant on Edward's generosity. I jogged down the steps, smiling when I saw Edward pouring some coffee into a ginormous mug. He pushed the mug across his quartz countertop. "Thank you."

"You're quite welcome," he said, rolling up his sleeves of his white button-down. He looked like a damned model, with tanned skin, artfully scruffy cheeks, white teeth, and muscular body. Pushed up into his disheveled hair were a pair of sunglasses. "I'm thinking breakfast first."

"Do we have any leftovers from when Alice was here?" I asked.

"I put that in the guest house fridge for Jasper. So, no," he replied. "I'm taking you to The Original Pancake House. It's got the most amazing breakfast food. Ever." He checked his watch. "We do need to get going, though. It's a bit of a drive."

"Describe a bit," I snickered, drinking my coffee.

"About an hour," he said. "Let me put the coffee in a travel mug." He picked up the cup and poured it into an insulated tumbler. Placing the lid on top, he moved gracefully toward me. He handed me the tumbler and twined our fingers together. After locking the garage entrance, we clambered into Edward's SUV. Backing out of the garage, Edward drove out of his subdivision and to the Pacific Coast Highway. "We'll stay on here for as long as we can. It's such a pretty drive," he explained.

I sipped my coffee, nodding as we sped along the highway. We stayed on it for fifteen minutes before hopping onto the freeway, heading toward Los Angeles. Our drive was quiet, except with the music playing. Edward gently tapped along with the rhythm of the song. He chuckled when we got stopped by some traffic. "I'm surprised you're not asking a million questions about what we're doing or where we're going."

"I have a twelve-year-old boy. I know how obnoxious those questions of 'are we there yet' are," I snickered. "Unfortunately, most of his time from five to almost ten, were spent in the car." My smile fell, shaking my head. I hated what my child had endured … it was my fault.

"Hey," Edward crooned, reaching across the console, and taking my hand. "I can see where your mind is heading."

"That I'm a mess?" I snorted humorlessly.

"We all have moments of where we're a 'mess.' But, from what I recognized, you're blaming yourself," he explained softly. "It's not your fault."

"Try as I might, it's hard to believe that," I retorted dryly. "Though, I will do my best to get into a better headspace through therapy and if needed, more. I've put this off for far too long. For me and for Seth."

"Why hadn't you considered that?" Edward asked. "Not to sound like an asshole, but it seems long overdue."

"Money was the main reason," I shrugged. "I've scraped and clawed my way out of poverty. I lived in my car, and I prayed that I never had to … deal with major medical issues because I had no medical insurance. Even now, after I've been paid quite well for some time and have an excellent medical insurance policy, I'm hesitant to spend any money frivolously. It all could be gone in a moment, at the snap of a finger. Hell, I was determined to drive my rust bucket until it fell apart. Jasper encouraged me to buy a new car, which I did. But, only after the fact that my rust bucket was beyond repair."

"Did you have heart palpitations while signing the paperwork?" Edward snickered.

"Yes. I was also freaking out because I paid for the car outright," I explained, smirking at him. I took a sip of coffee. "I doubt I'll ever be okay with money, even now that I have a buffer. I lost everything when my dad died, more than just a home, but my sense of safety, protection."

"And you never got it back, did you?"

I shook my head. "That's something I'm trying to come to grips with, and will probably cross that bridge with my future therapist," I answered. "Though, I feel safe, protected when I'm with you."

His smile was brilliant as he looked at me. "Really?"

I blushed, nodding, and kissing his palm. Leaving tomorrow would definitely be difficult. As much as I wanted to stay, I needed to go home to my son. I missed him something fierce, but Edward gave me the protection I never realized I needed. "Are we close to wherever we're getting breakfast? The coffee is good, but I'm hungry."

"Close, love," Edward snickered. "About ten minutes once we're out of this traffic snarl up."

We passed a road sign. "Anaheim? Are we going to Disneyland?" I asked as we drove past a sign for Disneyland and California Adventures.

"I figured it would be fun," Edward said, exiting the freeway. "I want to give you a day where we can just lose ourselves in all things Disney."

"I've never been," I murmured honestly. "My dad wanted to take me, but money was always pretty tight. Being a small-town police chief, it didn't pay very well. He tried to take me to Disney World when I was in fifth grade, but it fell through because of a scheduling snafu. We spent his vacation camping at Lake Pleasant. I would rather do that, spending time with my dad than have him …" My voice cracked with an unexpected wave of sadness.

Edward pulled into a parking lot and turned off the car. He gently cupped my cheeks. "I'm so sorry, gorgeous," he whispered. "You must miss him tremendously."

"It just hits out of nowhere," I murmured. "I want to be able to give Seth what my dad couldn't give me. I also wanted to be the parent my father was to me. We didn't have much, but I knew that my dad cherished me. I hope my son knows that I cherish him."

"We could bring Seth here the next time you're down here. What do you think?" Edward asked.

"I'd like that, but I want to … buy the tickets," I said, wrinkling my nose.

"Anything for you, gorgeous. Today, though, it's all on me," he said. "Come on. The best pancakes are waiting." He pressed his lips to mine before sliding out of the car. I opened the passenger door, only to be stopped by scowling Edward. I kissed his scowl away. He helped me out of the car, threading our fingers together.

We were greeted by a hostess, who led us to a spot near the window. A waitress came, taking our orders and delivering a pot of coffee. "So, what's your favorite thing to do at Disneyland?"

"It's been a long time since I've been to Disneyland," he chuckled. "The last time I was here was when I was here contractually."

"You used to work for Disney?" I asked.

"When I was a kid, yes," he snorted. "I did a few series for Disney before making the transition to movies."

"Were you on the Mickey Mouse Club?" I teased.

"Yeah, no. I can't dance to save my soul. I'm pretty musical. I can play the piano, guitar and have a decent voice. But, the connection from my brain to my feet? Nonexistent," Edward laughed. "If I was in a movie or a situation where I had to dance, I was placed in the back. Far in the back … or I used a body double."

Our breakfast was delivered, and we tucked into our meal. "This is delicious," I said.

"When I was a kid, before I really got into the entertainment industry, we'd come here before going to Disneyland," Edward explained. "Granted, both of my parents are famous in their own right. I didn't understand that as a kid. My dad would wear a disguise. I thought that was weirdest thing, but he was still determined to give me and Alice a regular childhood. No matter what, we had fun, and this was always the first stop."

"Now, you're continuing that tradition with me," I smiled. "Thank you."

We finished our delicious breakfast of pancakes, eggs and bacon. Edward paid our bill, leaving the waitress a hefty tip. Taking my hand, we left the diner and got back into Edward's SUV. He drove us to Disneyland, using some back entrance. When he parked in a nearly empty lot, I arched a brow at him. "Employee's entrance," he grinned, popping a tag onto his rearview mirror. "We'll still have to pay to get in, but parking here is much more convenient. It's one of the perks of being a former Disney employee."

"Why do I get the impression that this parking lot is for famous employees?" I snickered.

"Because it is. They cater to the talent, even if we work far longer than what's consider legal for a kid," he sighed. "Come on, love."

Love … he's called me that several times. What did that mean? Did he love me? Or was it just a cute nickname, like gorgeous? Or sweetheart?

After Edward paid for our tickets, we entered Disneyland. I grinned goofily as we walked along Main Street, USA. Sleeping Beauty's castle was in the distance and people were milling around. Edward pulled me to his side, holding up his phone. He snapped a few selfies, smiling and kissing me. I just melted against him, relishing in his affection. He slid his phone back into his pocket, tugging me to a gift shop. "What are we doing?"

"You can't come to a Disney Park without getting the ears," Edward said, searching the various racks for a set of Mickey ears. "Hmmmm, what about these?" He plucked a set with a red bow, putting them on my head.

"Edward, I do not need the ears," I snorted.

"Nope, you're getting the ears," he laughed, taking the set from my head and walking to the register. "Can I get these embroidered with a name?"

"Sure thing, sir. What name?" she asked.

He looked at me, a soft, tender smile on his face. "My Bella, two words."

"Of course. It'll be ready in an hour," she explained. He finished paying for the transaction and she handed him a ticket to pick up the set of ears. "Thank you, Mr. C-C-Cullen. Edward Cullen?" She looked up at him with wide eyes. "Oh, wow! I'm a huge fan!"

"Thank you," he said politely. "I appreciate it, but today I'm here with my girlfriend and not as an actor or a director. I'd truly appreciate if you didn't say anything about my being here. I really don't want to duck the paparazzi." His hand snaked around my waist before he brushed his lips along my temple.

"Of course," she nodded. "I'm sorry. I won't say a thing, but I can't say that other people won't."

"Thank you for protecting us," he grinned. "We'll pick up the ears in an hour." He shook her hand with a wink. I noticed he palmed some cash into her hand. Gently, he pulled me away and out onto the street. "I think we need to start easy enough. Dumbo or Tea Cups?"

"You're the expert," I giggled. "What do you recommend?"

"I think Dumbo, just to give our breakfast a chance to settle before we spin like crazy on the Tea Cups," he laughed. "Then, Space Mountain … you like roller coasters?"

"I've never been on one," I answered honestly. "I'm slightly afraid of heights."

"We'll work up to Space Mountain," he said. "It's a combination of heights and darkness."

"That sounds like hell," I groaned. "Am I going to have nightmares from riding a roller coaster?"

"I'll scare them away, love," Edward beamed, spinning me into his arms and kissing me gently. "No worries, today. Just you, me and a lot of fun."

We spent the morning riding all the staple Disney rides. Edward took pictures with his camera on the rides, constantly holding my hand, nuzzling my neck or kissing me. His affection was not overbearing, but sweet and gentle. I enjoyed his tenderness, but was not used to it. "I need to go to the bathroom," I said, gesturing to a nearby restroom.

"How about I run to get your ears and then meet back here, okay?" he suggested.

"Sounds good," I smiled. He kissed my forehead, disappearing into the crowd. I quickly went to the bathroom and sat down on a bench, pulling out my phone. I dialed Rose. I needed a woman's take on this. God, I was so emotionally stunted.

"Bells! How are things? Do I need to fly down there and castrate that asshole, Paul?" she asked in lieu of greeting.

"I don't think so," I sighed. "His career is essentially tanked thanks to his inability to be professional. Anyway, I'm calling you because I'm having an emotional break down."

"Do I need to kick Edward's ass?" she growled.

"No, he's been amazing," I sighed. "I just … I've been so closed off to human contact. He's always holding my hand and … kissing me and … I don't know how I feel about it."

"Oh, Bella," Rose cooed. "Is he making you feel uncomfortable? I'm certain that he'd back off if you asked."

"Not uncomfortable, just … you know my history. Any sort of touch I'd had before was painful," I whispered. "He's so gentle! I'm just … what if it's all an act? What if …"

"Bella, sweetie, you need to talk to Edward, but I doubt he'd hurt you," Rose explained. "Not all men are like …"

"Don't say his name," I huffed. "I know that Edward won't hurt me, but my psyche doesn't." I pulled up my legs, idly twisting my hair that had fallen out of the braid. "I just hate that I can't accept what he's giving me. I feel like I have to pay him back."

"I highly doubt that," Rose said. "When you first lived with me and Em, did he expect me to pay him back for his love? For his affection?"

"No," I answered. "But, you're normal. I'm …"

"Don't even finish that statement, Isabella Marie," Rose snarled. "If you think you're fucked up, you're a million percent wrong. You were forced into a difficult position, but it was not your fault. Jacob and his father were the animals. Not you, sweetie. However, if you don't feel comfortable with the affection that Edward is giving you, tell him."

"I don't want to send him mixed signals. I really like when he holds me. I feel safe," I said, tears welling in my eyes. "I can't remember the last time when I felt safe. Even now, I'm constantly looking over my shoulder. I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop …"

"I don't expect it drop with Edward, Bella," Rose said softly. "From what I've heard about him from Jasper, it's apparent that he's head over heels for you. But, talk to him. Let him know how you're feeling."

"Okay," I nodded, wiping my cheeks. "Thanks, Rose."

"Anything for you, honey. Love you, girl," Rose sang. "Let me know what he says when you get home, okay?"

"I will. Love you, too," I said, ending the call. I took a few deep breaths, trying to calm myself down. I managed to get my heart to relax and stopped the tears from falling. Edward came back, plopping the ears in my head and putting a bag in my lap. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, love … are you okay? You look like you were crying," he said, sitting down next to me. His thumb captured an errant tear. "Talk to me, Bella."

"Can we find a quiet corner?" I asked.

"Sure," he said, standing up and offering me his hand. I took it, holding the bag with my other hand. We walked to a restaurant and found a spot away from the crowds. "What is it, love?"

"I don't want you to get mad at me. If you do and you leave me here," I babbled. "I'd be …"

"Whoa, wait a minute. I would not leave you here, Bella. Even if I was upset with you, which I'm not," he said. "What is it?"

"I'm freaking out," I whispered. "You're so sweet and gentle and kind. You're always holding my hand, cuddling close to me or kissing me. I'm … not used to it. I mean, I'm not used to it being so public. I'm also afraid that … you'll expect something in return."

"I can see where this is going," he breathed. "Bella, love, my affection is given freely. I want the world to know that we're together. I love touching you, holding your hand, kissing you! If that's something that you would like me to tone down, I'll do it. I understand that you were hurt by … well, those assholes. I can tell you, without a shadow of a doubt, that I'd never hurt you the same way they did. It turns my stomach to even fathom what happened to you, Bella."

I nodded, twisting my watch around my wrist. Edward stopped the movement, picking up my hand and kissing my palm. I shuddered, relishing in his tenderness. "I'm sorry that I'm such a head case."

"You're not, Bella," he argued.

"No, I am. But, I'm going to get help," I sighed. "For me and for Seth. As soon as I get back to San Francisco, I'll …" I blew out a breath, blinking out the window. "I'll do some research, finding the right person to help me and my son." I turned back to him, smiling sadly. "I am sorry …"

"Stop apologizing, love," he murmured. "I know I can come off pretty strong, but I'm proud to be with you. However, I will try to lay off the public displays of affection."

"Not all of them," I blushed. "I like holding hands and an occasional kiss."

"That I can do," he replied, giving me a crooked grin. "Let's eat something and then we can go on the Pirates of the Caribbean and the Haunted Mansion."

We ordered some food and enjoyed a late lunch before going to the rides Edward had suggested. Before we went to the Haunted Mansion, we saw some of characters. He grinned brightly, dragging me to take pictures with the characters. I laughed as Mickey and Minnie Mouse surrounded me as I wore my ears. He took pictures, but soon joined me when a worker encouraged him to get in the photo.

We went to the Haunted Mansion, followed by riding "It's a Small World". Edward sang along with the melody, his lips brushing my ear. His voice was beautiful, rich and deep. His resonant voice did things to my body. I shifted on the bench as we glided through the water on the ride. "You okay, love?"

"Mmmhmm," I said, crossing my legs and giving him a smile. He returned my grin, pressing a soft kiss to my lips.

We got off the ride, just in time for the evening light parade. I shivered, as the temperature had gone down once the sun had set. Edward stood behind me, holding me close to his body. I watched the parade with a child-like wonder in my gaze. The music was amazing and the lights were just magical. "Seeing you like this, it makes today worth it," he said, kissing my cheek. He said something else, but I couldn't understand him due to the music and noise from the crowd. When the parade was done, the crowd dispersed. "One more stop before we go," Edward commanded, leading me toward the entrance of Space Mountain.

"Do we have to?" I pouted. "Heights, darkness, roller coasters? Sounds nightmarish. I don't know …"

"I won't force you," he said, cupping my cheek. "We can go."

"I'd like to stop at the gift shop and get some souvenirs for Seth," I said. "I brought some money."

"What did I say?" he argued, threading our fingers together.

"Edward," I grumbled. "I can buy Seth presents. It's so rare that I was able to do so … Now that I can, I want to."

"Okay," he agreed. "Can I get him one thing?"

"Yes, but with stipulations. $50 or less," I snickered.

"I can live with that, love. Let's go."

We walked back to the gift shop where we got my ears. Edward and I separated, in search of that perfect gift for my twelve-year-old son. He collected those Funko Pop figurines. I found a couple that he didn't have of Iron Man along with a key chain. I walked to the register, paying for Seth's goodies. Edward was waiting for me, holding a large bag. "That looks more than $50, Edward," I chided.

"What I got for Seth was $50 before tax," he snickered, sliding his arm around my waist. "I also got more than just that. Something for you."

"Edward," I sighed. "Really?"

"Yes, really," he snickered. "As I said, prepared to be spoiled, Bella. You deserve the best."

"You don't have to buy me anything. Holding my hand, hugging me when I'm sad, that's all I need," I whispered. "I'm with you because I like you, not your money." He stopped, stepping in front of me, caressing my cheek. His gaze was intense, making his green eyes look like they were glowing. "Edward? I'm sorry if I …"

"No," he whispered. "Don't apologize, Bella."

"You're freaking me out, Edward," I whispered back.

"My apologies, but hearing you say that … I know you're not with me because of the prestige. You see me as me. Not as a former actor or a director," he breathed, pressing his forehead to mine.

I reached up, rubbing his neck and squeezing his waist. "I see you as a good man, tender and kind, but confident and brilliant. You're also generous with your actions, your time, your friendship, your affection … I am blessed to have you in my life."

He crushed me to his chest, holding me to his muscular body. He didn't say anything, but I could feel his emotion in the strength of his embrace. He pulled back, cupping my cheek with his hand. The intensity in his eyes hadn't diminished. If anything, it had gotten stronger. "You mean the world to me, Bella. I hope you know that," he said.

"I do, Edward," I murmured.

"I wish I had used Liam today," he grumbled, taking my hand and leading us to the parking lot.

"Why?" I asked, struggling to keep up with his long-legged strides.

"Because, I'd rather hold you for an hour while we drive home as opposed to driving," he grumbled. "But, I will get to hold you all night, right? What time is your flight tomorrow?"

"We need to be at the airport by one in the afternoon," I answered, frowning as we arrived at his SUV. I didn't want to go. I wanted to stay, but I couldn't. I had responsibilities. My son needed me. As much as I wanted to be selfish, I had to put his needs first.

"I don't want you to leave either, but we'll be together soon," he said, opening the back door and tossing in the bag he carried. "What about Thanksgiving? I can fly up to visit you."

"What about your family?" I asked, getting into the passenger seat.

"I love my family, but I don't know if I can handle being around Alice. She's made a minute change, accepting you, but I'm afraid that she'll turn on a dime, believing that you're the devil incarnate again," Edward explained. He leaned forward, kissing me sweetly before closing the door and walking to the driver's seat. "I am so sorry about Alice and her bullshit. It'll take some time for me to forgive her. She betrayed you, betrayed me. I don't know if I can look past that."

"Edward, you shouldn't turn your back on your family," I argued. "Alice did make some poor choices, but don't give up on her."

He started the car, backing out of the spot and pulling out of the parking lot. "I just need time to forgive her. She will not, however, have any more control in my career," he said as he waited for a stop light to turn green.

"I thought you already removed her as counsel," I murmured.

"I have, but she's helping you with this situation involving Paul and Summit. By extension, she's helping me," Edward said. "Felix is now representing me as my attorney. I signed paperwork, severing my legal ties to my sister."

"She must hate that," I frowned.

"She does, but she understands. Alice realized that she crossed one too many lines, breaking my trust," he shrugged. "Fuck, when you piss off my mother, you know you screwed up royally. My mom is the most easy-going person ever. She ripped into my sister after she wouldn't let things go."

"I hope that, in time, you'll get that close relationship with your sister back. I hate that I caused a rift between you two," I muttered.

"Bella, love, you did not cause the rift. You are not at fault," Edward said fervently. "I don't want to argue. You're leaving tomorrow and you're taking a part of my heart back to San Francisco with you. I understand that you do not want me to fight with my sister or alienate my family. Sometimes, time and space is what's needed for me to get over my sister's overbearing and bitchy nature."

"I can understand the need for time and space," I snorted. "I'm sorry … I'd love to have you come up for Thanksgiving. Usually, I spend it with Rosalie and Emmett. They have a large home, perfect for entertaining."

"I don't want to impose," he said, easing onto the highway.

"You'll be fine. We usually have an occasional random guest, either a last-minute date that Jasper invited or a college student who couldn't go home for whatever reason," I explained.

"I'll make arrangements to fly up for Thanksgiving, then," he said, his lips curving up. "It'll make your departure a little easier tomorrow."

The drive was quiet, with Edward humming along with the music playing over the radio. I texted back and forth with Seth and Rose, telling them about my day and about our extra guest for Thanksgiving. Seth was excited to meet Edward, face-to-face. Rose had a fangirl moment, but I told her to cool her tits. Edward was my boyfriend, and she already had a famous hubby.

We arrived back at Edward's home. Jasper and Marcus were sitting at the outdoor living room with a fire lit in the glass fire pit. My friend looked a little sunburnt, but he had a smile on his face. Marcus waved. We walked over to where they were sitting. That's when I smelled it.

"Jasper, you are going to have the munchies," I snickered.

"Yep," he grinned. "With all the bullshit we've been dealing with, Marcus offered me some really good weed. Want some?"

"No, thanks," I said.

"What about you, Cullen?" Marcus asked, holding up a joint.

"Tempting, but no. Are you spending the night, Marcus?" Edward asked.

"I don't think so. I'll walk to my dad's place. He's just a mile down the beach," he said, getting up on wobbly legs. "Whoa … head rush."

"You okay?" Edward questioned.

"Too much weed, not enough food. I'll be fine," Marcus said. "It was awesome hanging with you, Jasper. I'll see you the next time you're in Los Angeles." They shook hand and Marcus shuffled toward the beach.

"I'm going to crash," Jasper yawned. "After I indulge in some munchies. Any chocolate in that kitchen?"

"There should be," Edward snickered. "There's also corn chips and Cheetos, too."

"Sweet!" Jasper beamed, scrambling up and into the guest kitchen.

"You know you're going to have orange fingerprints all over your furniture in there," I quipped as Edward unlocked the door to his house. "Jasper lives for Cheetos."

"So do I," Edward laughed, opening up his pantry. There was an entire shelf dedicated to Cheetos. "But, I don't eat them when I have the munchies. I eat them when I'm stressed."

"I can understand stress eating," I smirked. "Speaking of stress, I do need to pack to go home and I want to shower. I'm covered in sunscreen and I smell like a churro."

"It's not your usual scent," he teased. "I'm going to lock up. I'll meet you upstairs." He kissed me, his lips molding to mine. I melted against him, which made him smile against my mouth. "We'll do more of that upstairs, after I shower, as well."

"'Kay," I nodded.

Walking up the stairs, I closed the door to the master bedroom. I put the souvenirs I'd purchased for Seth into my bag before taking out a fresh pair of underwear and my pajamas. I took a quick shower, not washing my hair because I did not want to be up for hours while waiting for it to dry. I was slathering on some lotion when Edward knocked on the door. "Come on in," I called out.

Edward walked in, his muscular torso bare and his tattoos on full display. He was carrying his bag and his hair was damp. "Feel better?"

"I don't feel like I'm a churro," I giggled, tossing my hair up into a messy bun. "What's that?"

"My gift to Seth, along with a gift to you," he said, sitting down on the bed. "You might think it's stupid, but …" He pulled out a stuffed Mickey Mouse. "Something to snuggle with?"

"No, it's great," I said, sitting down next to him and hugging Mickey to my chest. "When I said I lost everything when my father died, I mean everything. I have some pictures, but my childhood home was sold to the highest bidder, including my stuffed animals." I pressed my nose to Mickey's forehead, inhaling the subtle scent of Edward's cologne. I closed my eyes, holding it closer to my chest.

"Bella, I didn't mean to make you cry," he whispered, wiping away a tear from my cheek.

"I'm fine," I breathed, putting the toy on the nightstand. "It just baffles me that you're so kind."

He pulled me into his arms, laying down on the pillows. "It baffles me that people could be so cruel, hurting you for no apparent reason," he growled. "That your choice was taken away. Have you ever …"

"The only time I willingly gave myself to another person was the day of my father's funeral. I didn't want to feel the emptiness of his death. I went to Jacob," I murmured. "When he got rough, I asked him to stop. He didn't. I just shut down."

Edward's eyes were swirling with anger, but his caress was so gentle. "Not all physical intimacy is like that, Bella. It's about sharing something so special. I wish I could take that memory away."

"Show me," I said to him breathily. "Please? My body isn't perfect, but …"

"You're beautiful," he said, turning to run his fingers down my cheek. "You're in control, love. If I do something that you are not comfortable with, tell me and I'll stop."

"Can we turn off the lights?" I asked. "I have … scars."

He nodded, turning off the lamp on the nightstand. The room darkened immediately save for the moonlight that shone through the window. "I don't care about the physical scars, Bella. You are beautiful, inside and out." His hand slid down my arm, lifting my hand to his bare chest. He pressed my hand above his heart. It was steady and strong. "This is yours, Bella."

"Edward," I murmured.

"Seriously, Bella," he said, sliding his arms around my body. "I've said this before and I'll say it again … I never felt this way about another woman. Ever. I doubt I'll feel this way about someone ever again." It looked like he wanted to say more, but he leaned forward and brushed his lips over mine. His arms tightened around my body with his fingers sliding underneath my shirt. His fingertips were hot against my skin, making me moan into his mouth.

Our kisses were slow, languid as he massaged his hands along my back, both over and under my shirt. His mouth molded against mine, teasing me with his teeth and tongue. My fingers tangled into his damp hair. Gently, I traced my fingertips down his neck and along his collarbone, making him shiver. His kisses moved from my mouth to my neck, sucking just below my ear. "Edward," I gasped as his teeth nipped on my earlobe. He hummed deeply, moving us so I was on my back. I began to panic, pushing on his chest.

"What is it?" he asked, his green eyes bright with concern.

"I don't like to be …" I said. "Don't hold me down."

"Never, love," he said, moving me so was sitting astride his lap. "You're in control. I don't want to hurt you or make you panic."

"I don't know … what to do," I blurted. "Yes, I have a child. Yes, I've been sexually active, but I don't know … I'm afraid of …"

"You have nothing to fear from me, gorgeous," he said in the darkness, sitting up and looking at me. "May I touch you?" I nodded and his tender fingers moved up my bare arms. It was just a breath of a touch, caressing my skin atop my hands, my forearms and shoulders. "Are you okay?"

"Y-Y-Yes," I stammered out, my eyes closing. "So good."

"Keep your eyes on me, love. I want you to see that I won't hurt you," he said softly. His caress moved to my back, with a single finger moving up my spine, lifting my top. I kept my eyes on his while he scratched my back, tracing my shoulder blades and running his finger along my collarbone. I shuddered, shifting on his lap. His hands were making me yearn for more. I knew my nipples were standing at attention and I was becoming aroused. "You're so beautiful, Bella." He barely kissed me, ghosting his lips over mine. I rolled my hips over his hardness, needing to feel more of him. "Do you trust me?"

"Yes," I nodded, throwing my head back as his lips glided along my jaw.

"May I take off your shirt, Bella?" he asked. I tensed. "That's all … I want to touch your soft, supple skin." He kissed me, soft and sweet. I relaxed and found the hem of my shirt. I stopped kissing him, tossing my shirt onto the floor. I hid my breasts with one arm and the stomach with the other. "Why are you hiding from me, love?"

"Like I said, I'm not perfect," I frowned.

He moved my arms away from my body, but kept his eyes on my face. "Bella, regardless of what you think, you're beautiful to me," he said soothingly. Blowing out a breath, I draped my arms onto his shoulders. I dipped my chin, giving him permission to look at me.

My torso was littered with scars. The ugliest scar was the stab wound under my breast from when the man tried to rape me and I killed him in self-defense. I also had scars along my ribcage, back and stomach from where Jake liked to whip me when he was having a bad day. I'd gladly take those in order to protect my son, but the one that hurt the most was the scar hidden by pajamas. The scar where my womanhood was stolen from me.

Edward's hands glided along my back. His expression was neutral but I could see the sadness, the pity in his eyes. "Don't … don't pity me."

"It's not pity. It's compassion. It's anger," he whispered. "I'm pissed off that someone did this to you in the first place."

He pulled me closer, crushing my body against his. The feeling of his warm skin against mine made me cry out a sob. I clung to him, burying my face against his neck. He massaged my shoulders. His large, warm hands soothing me and running along my skin. I don't know how long I stayed in his arms, but my legs were numb. I pushed back, wiping my cheeks. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, Bella," he said, his voice rough. "Don't ever apologize."

I looked at him and his cheeks were damp. I traced my fingers along his jaw. "Why are you crying?"

"I'm crying because the mere thought of hurting you makes me sick," he answered. "I hate the people who marred your skin this way." He picked up my hand, kissing my palm. "What happened to you … you did not deserve this. Intimacy and sex and love, those are things that should be given without any sort of fear of repercussions. I want you to know that everything that I give you, whether it be something physical like our friend over there …" He looked at the Mickey he'd bought me with a wry smirk, "or anything else, I do not expect any sort of repayment."

"Promise?" I asked, fear creeping into my voice.

"Oh, Bella, always," he smiled, kissing me.

I nodded, sliding my arms around his neck. He rolled us so we were both on our sides. "Can we stay like this?" I asked, cuddling closer to him.

"I get to hold my girl. Of course, love," he chuckled, brushing his lips on my forehead. "Sleep, love."

"I'm sorry I'm a mess," I deadpanned.

"You're not a mess. You're going through some things," he argued. "Just relax. I'll keep you safe." I yawned, burrowing closer to him. His fingers glided along my back and I drifted. As my mind tumbled toward sleep, I heard Edward's voice. I wasn't sure if it was a dream or not … "Love shouldn't hurt. I'll never hurt you, Bella. I love you …"

A/N: I had a lot more planned for this chapter, but if I had kept it, the chapter would have been 30,000 words long. So, I'm dividing it up. We had some Disney fun with Directorward! We also had some lightly sweetened lemonade. With Bella being so tortured, we need to take things slowly. Very, very slowly.

Pictures from this chapter are on my blog. You can access that through a link in my profile. I'm also on FB: Tufano79's Twilight Fanfiction Appreciation. I'm on twitter, too: tufano79.

Up next will be a flashback … which will come with a trigger warning … Bella's return to San Francisco, finding a therapist and some drama.

Before I go, please take a moment to say prayers for a fallen fandom member. Yesterday, it was posted that Grandmachix, Judy, had passed away. I don't know the details, but my heart is sad for the loss of a beloved reader and friend. Please keep Judy's family in your thoughts. This chapter is written in her honor. I will truly miss her support, friendship, and amazing reviews.

Leave me your thoughts! Thanks for reading!