Synopsis:

She was happiness. She was joy. A charming little girl with who would always see the positive side of things and try to find the good in people's heart. . . That girl was me, at some point. An innocent soul with a pure heart along with the mindset where everyone would get their happily ever after, prince charming and everything like in most fairy tales. . .

But this story is not one of those.

There is no prince charming or a knight in shining armour, but I can guarantee you that there will be dragons with flames, demons from many kinds, creatures from legends, and battles like no other.

But the greatest fight of all is. . . The conflict within the heart with weapons that many know as. . .

Emotions. . .

I am Miyuki Urameshi. The girl who lost her spark, but ended up coming back as the whole damn fire.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho or the show's characters, only my OCs. One OC, however, belongs to a friend of mine ( _b.b.e_art_ on Instagram.)

️Warning: There will be cursing, violence, blood and other stuff that you might not like. So read it with your own responsibility.

After this little 'story-time' Koenma had with us, everyone left home while I stayed in the hospital wing since I was not fully well. As much as I hated bed rest, I succumbed to the idea, mainly because I don't want Ruby and the boys to worry about me, unnecessarily.

Well, Hiei is probably not really worried about me. . . . For Heaven's sake why do I even care if he is worried about me or not. But I know for a fact that he doesn't care about me. . .

The only reason why he even saved me is probably because Koenma forced him to since he is still under Spirit World's Supervision and Care, or that I am a somewhat worthy opponent to fight with and once he was done he would just throw me again like yesterday's garbage. Either of those reasons made me feel upset for some reason but I don't know why. . .

Why do I even care about these stupid things!?

Stupid emotions and these stupid Phoenix powers!

Probably another reason on Hiei's care list- OKAY MIND, YOU CAN SHUT UP NOW!

Why is this happening to me?

The very thought of Hiei just makes my mind go crazy. My heart would also go on a marathon. That very thought made my right hand go up to my chest as if, it wants to feel the heartbeat that would skip a beat occasionally. . .

This felt so strange. . . but also . . . right and familiar. . . The very last time I felt this way when I was with Sanyu. . .

With many thoughts racing through my mind, the eyelid that was once up, it closed, and right after that, I was out like a light.

The next thing I knew, I woke up in a dark place. I was in the white nightgown I had slept in it along with the bandages that covered my entire left arm and right forearms. I lifted my hand up to my face and touched the right side of my face, feeling the bandages over there still. Frantically I was looking around this place-.

"No wonder you couldn't save that so-called friend of yours." A very familiar voice echoed around the place, making me feel like I am actually in a tunnel.

"Aren't you dead?!" I firmly asked, only to receive no direct answer from that cursed Gargamel but a smug reply.

"Sanyu was his name, I believe?" Zankoku's voice once again talked to me. Darting my eye left to right, I tried to find the source of the voice.

What's this? Is that bastard is in my mind or this is just the memories that I made at that cursed castle are trying to traumatize me further?

Before I can theorize any longer, my eye suddenly caught something that I never thought I would see. My breath was held back as my heart drop down into my feet.

There was a little boy.

Blueish black hair. That blue bandana around his head. . . Green t-shirt. . . And when he turned around I saw his innocent face. . . with those green eyes that matched with his big brother's. . .

"Sanyu. . . ?" I whispered out in total disbelief. I couldn't believe this. . . Never in these two years had ever got a chance to meet him in any of my dreams. . . not even once. . .

But now I see him. . . right here. . . right now. . .

I wanted to feel joy. . . happiness. . . but I felt none of it. . .

All I felt was pain. . . and guilt. . .

I hesitantly began to walk over, but then my legs suddenly changed their minds and began to broke into a spring. Before I know what was going on, I was running toward the little boy.

"SANYU!" Miyuki cried out in desperation as she was running toward the little boy with the desire to hold him in her arms again. The closer the teen girl got to the little boy, the younger her physical appearance becomes. Like she is turning back into that little girl again. Her old self that allowed herself to be carefree and feel emotions. The little child she once was, full of hope, joy with a pure soul.

"Why. . . ?" Sanyu's soft voice asked, making the now five-year-old little girl stop on her tracks in surprise. "Why did you stop. . . ? You could have healed me but you didn't. . ." Once those words left his mouth, the girl felt that pang of guilt again jabbing her right in the heart's sore spot.

"I-I tried, I really did!" Little Miyuki's high pitched voice replied in defence, only to get more hurtful statements in return.

"Do you even care about me?" The little boy questioned as he turned away from the girl, letting out soft sobs through his lips, which caused great heartache to the young Urameshi girl.

"Of course I do!" Little Miyuki replied with honesty as she reached her small hand toward her first friend. "Sanyu, I lo-!" Once she grabbed the boy's wrist her entire vision turned white in a flash. When it died down, The Urameshi girl found herself in the hospital room again, where she and her best friend once were. Her small and warmhand was still holding onto Sanyu's. However, it felt so limp. . . and cold to the touch. . . Then came the long and endless beep of a heart monitor which reached the black-haired girl's ears as her now twelve-year-old self still held onto her once alive best friend. "N-no. . ." Miyuki whispered, her voice cracking as she felt her left eye was slowly building up the salty tears. "SANYU!" Called out the girl as she leaned closer to the boy's face. His appearance changed into a different one, but it was twisted by the terminal sickness the little boy had suffered. "No Sanyu, please! Stay with me!" The young girl desperately cried for him as her small hand summoned the water from the glass on the bedside table, preparing herself to heal the boy and try to save him. But as her hand was suddenly grabbed by the thought to be dead Sanyu. The young girl gasped in horror before turning to her best friend who looked at her with pure hatred as angry tears rolled down from his blood-shot eyes.

"This is all your fault!" The vision of the sick child exclaimed in rage, his voice foreigner and not the one the Urameshi girl once knew. . .

"Sanyu-!" The black-haired young girl called out softly, but her childhood best friend was not having it, at all.

"You had the power to help, but you didn't do it on me! Friends are supposed to be there for each other! I HATE YOU!" He spat through the breathing mask with so much venom dripping from his tone. The very last sentence completely shattered the Miyuki. She got so distracted that she didn't even notice her wrist is being squeezed so much so that it could crush the bones into pieces. The pain finally snapped her out of her trance and noticed the hand that is about to break her hand. The black-haired girl was about to pry it off, but instead, a scream escaped from her throat when Sanyu's grasp began to now burn her skin. Shutting her eyes tight Miyuki finally had the strength to rip herself free from her childhood friend's grasp. However, when she faced him, he was now gone.

Then she felt something cold hit her bare feet underneath. The Urameshi girl looked down and saw the water appearing out of nowhere, and it's level was rising up. The teen girl's mind immediately ordered her to use her water bending abilities again, but the movement of her limbs suddenly got restrained by iron cuffs that appeared out of the blue and trap her.

"What?" She asked in shock, now her body returned to its original age and form. The water was now high enough to reach Miyuki's chin but then above her head. Before the girl can drown a hand appeared out of nowhere and grabbed her by the left wrist and pulled her out of the water. The chains broke off easily and now the girl was safe. She coughs out the water she had accidentally swallowed and looked up to the rescuer who had his arms wrapped around her. A small surprised gasp came out of her lips when she recognized those pair of scarlet orbs. "Hiei?" She breathed out. Just then her real self spanned her eye open.

My eye snapped open and the first thing I felt was a hand pressed against my forehead. Quickly I grabbed it and shot up from the hospital bed. I face the person who was by my bedside. That's when I saw those ruby eyes again.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him with a weak voice as I slowly my consciousness came back to me.

"Hn." Was all I got before he pulled his hand out of my hold and walk over to the window that was next to me and sat on the windowsill with his arms crossed over his chest and one leg on top of the other.

"Hmpf." I huffed out in annoyance as I turn my gaze away from Shadow Lord. What a prick. "Shouldn't you be sleeping?" I asked him suspiciously since this is so unlikely of him to just appear next to me.

"I was about to go on a walk, but I heard you talking to someone so I went to check it." Hiei rudely replied as he turned to face the outside world. I took a glance at it too. By the looks of the colours, it was morning. . . Well, kind of. "Who was that?" Hiei quietly asked, with a small hint of curiosity in his tone.

"Huh?" I hummed questioningly. . .

"That boy, in your dream. . ." Shadow Lord corrected but never once turned to me. "Was he your. . . mate?" At the question, I feel my face burning a little in embarrassment, but at the same time. . . I felt sad, mostly because of the painful memories. . .

"N-no, he was. . . Not really. . . my mate or anything like that. . . but we were really close. . ." I replied a little hesitantly, right before I as my right hand went up to my neck. That's when I began to panic. My ring. It was gone. . . . I frantically began to look around, but then relief washed over me as soon as I found that familiar phoenix ring on the bedside table next to me, on top of the blue ribbons which are usually holding up my hair. My good hand reached for my treasure and gently picked it up with the chain. All of these things are still in good condition even after the many chaos me, my brother and the others had gone through. . . . How is this possible?

Either way, I was glad that it's still in good shape. . .

Anyway, I try not to think too much about it because either way, I am glad to have them still. My fingers on my left arm were about to move, so in a way, I can see if I am able to use it to put the chain around my neck, where it's safe. Sadly the slightest movement made want to scream in pain. I had to bit my bottom lip hard so I won't make a noise. Once the pain wave disappeared I sighed in disappointment. However, I didn't stop grasping onto it. My shoulders were slightly trembling as I try to seal my seeping emotions back into the bottle along with the tears that I hadn't shed for two whole years. I shook my head and looked at the jewellery in my hand again.

I really wanted to put it on somehow. . . and suddenly, I found myself turning to Hiei's direction.

'No.' I thought to myself. 'That Jackass would just ignore me. He wouldn't care for such little thing like that. . .'

"I suppose he was the one that gives that to you. . ." I hear his voice making this very sentence. Mutely I nodded my head. . .

My fingers curled up on the phoenix ring as I shut my eyes tight.

"Yes. . . " I quietly replied. . . "He and his brother, Shuichi was my very first friend." I began sadly as the memories once again flashed through my vision. "When I was little and lived back in another city, I discovered that I had water-bending abilities by accident. Being the naïve little brat I thought this could be the key to make friends. Sadly it turned out to be the very thing that caused my downfall." I exhaled a little. " My plan of sharing this 'cool gift' backfired and on top of all, I was called a monster for it." Then I let out a small laugh. "I remember how my big brother chased those bullies away. Leaving me alone in the park for a moment. But then I met Sanyu along with Shuichi and their kind mother who just happened to walk by. " Pausing a little I took a deep breath as I brought the necklace up to my chest.

"Kurama never told me he had a brother. . ." Hiei said out of nowhere and to my surprise, he sounded genuinely confused.

"He passed away two years ago. . ." I told him, my voice almost cracking with many emotions that again, tried to escape out of my bottle. There was the coughing fit again, but it stopped at the fourth one. "So he propably rarely mention him since it was so. . . painful to lose someone precious to you. . ."

"Hn." As expected the almighty Shadow Lord huffed and looked outside the window, probably looking for something more interesting that this human girl, who is being. . . a cry-baby. . . again. . .At the thought I sighed and turned my head away to another direction, feeling ashamed and angry with myself to look so weak and vulnerable at this very moment.

"That 'friend' of yours said that it was your fault." Hiei pointed out, making me lower my head down even more with the pain crawling back up in my chest. "What did he mean by that?" Once again I sadly sighed.

Unknowingly by the two, their mentioned redheaded friend just headed toward the room's direction to check on his childhood best friend's condition. However when he was about to knock on the door-.

"What did he mean by that?" The voice of his demon friend made him froze in his actions and raise a curious eyebrow. A long pause follows the question but it was soon interrupted by Miyuki.

"Can you keep a secret?" Kurama instantly recognized that other voice who asked the question. Now his curiosity kicked in and to his better judgment, he began to lean a little closer to eavesdrop on his friend's conversation.

"Hn." Hiei rolled his eyes and looked away with an annoyed expression. The Urameshi girl also rolled her eye at the hard-headed demon's behaviour, but she took that as a 'yes'. She sighed and began to explain her side of the story.

"When Shiori informed me about Sanyu's condition, I felt like my whole world just collapsed." The Urameshi girl gloomily began to explain, making Kurama's eyes soften up as his own grief began to take over his heart. As for the Fire Demon, he slowly turned to the girl who was staring at her lap. Her ink-black hair hiding her blank yet pain-filled eyes. "He was always there to keep me company, to cheer me up when I am sad, . . . " The girl then breathed out a short laugh. "Just like his brother, he had a gentle and kind heart which was too pure to the world. . ." Her voice cracked like glass. "Sanyu was my happiness. . . The spark that kept me going. . . " Her grip on her precious treasure got tight before the girl took a deep but shaky breath. "Anyways, one day after another hospital visit, I accidentally burned my hand when I tried to cook for myself for the first time. When I poured the cold water on my injuries, I discovered the healing side of my ability."

"And you tried to use it in an attempt to save your friend's life." Hiei concluded and earned a weak nod from the black-haired girl after a small pause since she really didn't expect someone so arrogant and cold like this demon close to her to even listen to some sob story. This fact surprised the Urameshi girl greatly but she didn't show it.

"After that moment, I tried everything to make Sanyu feel better from his illness." Miyuki continued on with an aching heart and another fit of harsh coughs. "Whenever no one was looking and Sanyu was asleep I would use the water I brought with me and try to do some healing on him. . . But every time I did that, nothing seems to work out." A sharp breath escaped from the female Spirit Detective's lips. "Being determined I didn't stop, but also being a foolish young child I got caught by him." That got Kurama's attention. "I panicked right there and there, but. . ." As the black-haired teen girl began this new sentence, her voice trailed off in a sound that matched with the screeching of the chalk that was slowly and forcefully draw the lines on the chalkboard. "Instead of the expected rejection and the hatred, he just gave me a smile and despite the fact that I lied and kept this curse in secret said 'It's okay, but it wouldn't matter anyway if you have it or not, because you will always be my best friend'. . . " Hiei's eyes softened up. Even his stoic expression just a little. As for the fox-demon, he felt like his heart swell with sorrow. "But still. . .I felt so ashamed of myself. . ." Miyuki continued on as she tried to keep her voice steady. But it broke, no matter how hard she tried to stay strong. "I felt like a failure. . . a disappointment when I couldn't save him. . . I had something that would save my friend. . . but I . . . I let him down. . ." The girl took a deep and sharp breath before pushing her clutches onto her lips, firmly while her eye was shut tight. "After his passing. . . I didn't felt worthy of his friendship. . . And from then on I refused to get close to others because I am afraid that I would hurt . . . or fail them in some way. . ." Then another pause took over for a short time. "When I saw Shuichi again for the first time in a long time. . . I felt awful . . . Because in some way I felt like I failed him too. . . And whenever I look into his eyes. . . I saw his little brother. . ."

Kurama's heart dropped as those words sank into his mind. Now it made sense to him why his childhood best friend was so uneasy whenever she looked at him into his eyes, on the first occasions. Not only that, now he understood everything. Everything.

"Does Kurama know about this?" Questioned Hiei. I shook my head in reply.

"After the funeral, my family and I instantly moved away." I weakly informed him. "I didn't even mention that to him nor his mother. . . I was too ashamed of myself. . . and disappointed. . . and I still do. . . "

"Hmpf." Hiei scoffed at that. "You and your human emotions." He rolled his eyes at me, but I just kept on holding onto my phoenix ring that I soon brought down to my vision and look at it with admiration.

"Of course you would think that. . ." I breathed out, sounding a little . . . disappointed for some reason. . . I mean, I already know he doesn't care for humans. . .But then I remembered my conclusion about him and myself. We are similar yet so different at the same time. We hate showing weakness and have many battles against our emotions.

However, he pushes away people like me but both of us have our reasons behind it. I do that in order to save people from the pain and disappointment I am. . .

As for Hiei. . . I am not sure but from what I had seen. . . His gestures and acts. . . He respects others who he thinks is worthy and strong, not to mention he has a very hard time trusting in other people. . .

Either he just hates being social and his ego is too high. . . or he is. . . . afraid of something. . . Like rejection. . .

I shook my head and looked at the fire demon on the windowsill. With a sigh, I turned back to my necklace. . .

But suddenly my vision started to blur and I felt lightheaded. . . At the same time, however. . . I felt like a small amount of emotional weight had been lifted off of my chest sending me relief, but that also made me feel like crap. The black spots began to take over my vision and before I knew my body leaned to the side. Or more like fell.

My balance was thrown off as the strength that I once had in my still healing body had now left me. Pair of arms kept me from falling off of the bed. I weakly turned my gaze upward to look at my rescuer and I couldn't help but find myself smiling with amusement while my mind pulled out another conclusion I had discovered.

"You may not be the man of many words Hiei. . . but. . . your actions speaks more volumes than any. . ." I weakly said to Hiei before coughing a little again, then without warning, I pass out in his embrace that surprisingly felt warm and. . . comforting. . .

There was it again. That small smile that would make my chest fest feel weird and all fuzzy inside as my mind go blank.

What does this Little Detective possess that makes me feel that way? I violently shook my head, trying to get these ridiculous thoughts out of me. Then I looked down at the small frame of a girl in my arms.

There it is again. The warm feeling inside of me, making my cold and stoic demeanour melt like ice. My eyes then darted to the human's hand that is grasping onto her precious ring necklace.

I noticed earlier how she looked at me. Probably wanting to ask for some assistance to put that jewellery on. It sounded silly in my opinion, but then again. . .

I sighed and just placed the girl back onto the hospital bed in a more comfortable position. My hand pulled the covers over her but made sure her arms were above it. The stare then suddenly trailed down to her hand again that held the necklace. I looked between that and the girl's half-bandaged face.

With a sigh, my hand went for the phoenix ring and gently pulled it out of the girl's grasp. After that was done my eyes then suddenly got captivated by the shiny object I am holding right now.

It somewhat reminds me of the time when I had my Hiruseki stone. . . My gaze then once again turned to Miyuki. Inhaling deeply I hovered over her pale face. As gently and carefully as I could I placed the necklace around her neck. Once I did that, my hands began to pull away, but on the way, they occasionally touched a few long and black locks that belonged to the Little Detective. I must say she looked so much different with her hair down. . . Then once again my hands couldn't help reach up to the girl's face and brush away the bangs. My fingers accidentally brushed the surface of the bandage's that soon trailed down to the edge of the skin as well. . . As soon as I made contact with it my whole face warmed up while.

Like a rose pedal it was so soft and tender. . . NO! Don't fool yourself around here with these. . . emotions. . . You're a warrior. You don't have time for something so ridiculous like love-.

My ears suddenly caught the turning of the doorknob. With my speed, I flashed to the wall next to the window, as far from the bed as possible. The door opened and the familiar fox-demon revealed himself.

He looked at the girl's, then he turned to me questioningly.

"How is she Hiei?" Kurama asked as he walked over for a better look. That made me slightly glare at him.

"Hn. She will live. Just like before." I bluntly replied with my arms crossed over my chest. He nodded his head quietly then his gaze fell on the blue ribbons that are resting on top of the bedside table. I can clearly see the guilt in his eyes when looked at that. His hand reached for it and softly stroked the fabric material before putting it back down and turn to the ribbon's owner with sorrow. But I also noticed something. . . "How much did you heard?" I asked him with a blank expression yet suspicion in my tone which I didn't even attempt to hide.

"Enough to finally understand. . ." Kurama replied sadly. I mentally rolled my eyes while I physically closed them right before a deep inhale through my nose. Why am I feeling this angry? Jealous? Why do I care what that fox is doing to my mate-?

I stopped on my track of thoughts. . . .

Did I just admit that she is really my mate? Okay, this is getting ridiculously out of hand.

"Thank you for helping her." I hear Kurama say making me look at him and I see the knowing twinkle in his eyes along with a small smile.

"Hn, I have no idea what you're talking about." I rudely snapped at him as I turned my head away. I suddenly feel my cheeks heating up once more.

What's this nonsense?

"Take good care of her. Okay?" I hear fox say it again, with a teasing yet knowing tone. I just scoffed and didn't budge. A heavy sigh came out of the redhead as his footsteps became distant step by step. The door opened, then it shut close gently. I turned my head where Kurama once stood, but when my stare was about to settle on my teammate, my attention was suddenly caught by something colourful on the table.

The small vase that had been on the table, and was once empty, is now filled with flowers. Three different coloured roses to be exact. One was pale pink, the other was yellow and the last one was some kind of peach colour. The burning anger once again flamed within me since I know exactly who gave those to the Little Detective, but I just took a deep breath and try to calm this weird feeling down.

'I don't care.' I harshly scolded myself mentally. 'She is probably better off without me and so am I without her. Why do I need someone like her anyway?'

But no matter how hard I try to convince my brain with these lies, my demon heart for some reason doesn't want to believe in them. . . and in fact want the opposite of things. . .

Like the love and affection of my chosen one. . . And her heart that probably won't accept me. . .

I bet once if I get close to her, by some miracle, history will probably repeat itself with me, just like the many times before. . . me getting rejected by everyone. . .