Chapter 9:

He was still wiping her forehead with a cool cloth when the doctor left as he sat down next to her on the edge of the bed. Owen wasn't sure what to do when he ran down the stairs and found Claire lying unconscious on the floor. Should he call the doctor or an ambulance? And what was he going to do with Madison who was already sound asleep in her bed, thank God, because at least she didn't have to see her mother like this. In the end, he decided to call the doctor and follow his instructions. He had come to visit, finding her already in bed while Owen tended to her, and from the check-ups that he managed to run, he concluded that Claire must have passed out due to malnutrition. As the doctor was examining her, Owen realized just how much she had lost weight lately, scolding himself for not noticing what was going on with her, not that she made it easy to do so. She had been avoiding him for weeks now and Owen wasn't entirely sure why or when that had started to happen. Well okay, after Madison's birthday party and the talk of ultimatum that Claire ended up giving him, things were sure to feel rocky since he was still with Jessica apparently, and it wasn't for lack of decision making…well not that he was entirely sure either. He felt uncomfortable and confused. Uncomfortable to start such a talk with Jessica, because deep down he knew that he wanted to be with Claire and Madison and start living together as a family but at the same time, he really didn't want to hurt Jessica. She really didn't deserve all of this. Things had been great between them and now, even two days before the actual day of the wedding, Owen was still unsure and still in Claire's house.

It was way past the time he usually left to go home to her, and it hadn't even crossed his mind to text Jessica to let her know what happened with Claire and why he still wasn't home, and if she did text, well Owen couldn't care to check his phone. All his attention was on Claire. She was all he could think about. The doctor's words were still echoing loud in his head, giving him a headache…malnutrition! Did she loose weight? He had asked him, and Owen had stammered at that question because he hadn't noticed and he felt stupid. He wanted to kick himself for ignoring the signs, and then he recalled when she almost had that panic attack in her office before she had to go to Chicago. It should have been a sign that things weren't right, but at the same time, she did lead a hectic life, and Owen was sure that her life has been this way ever since she had Madison. It wasn't like he was the cause of all of this…or was he?

The slight movement, the sound of light rustling of the covers, pulled him out of his thoughts, his eyes landing on her face. Her eyes were still closed, and Owen frowned not sure if she was still a little pale or if it was just the light from the lampshade standing on the bedside table. The doctor had given her a booster and also ordered some vitamins and practically ordered Owen to get her to his clinic in the morning, since she didn't appear to be in any particular danger. Her heart rate was stable and her vitals seemed to be good too. He had also asked Owen if she was going through a stressful time in her life and Owen had confirmed it, because that much he knew. Between work and their situation, not to mention the almost panic attack she had weeks ago in her office, Owen was sure Claire was stressed out.

'Owen' she whispered softly. Her voice had been so low, Owen almost didn't hear her.

'I'm here' he whispered as he leaned slightly closer to her, his hand reaching out to cup her cheek, his thumbs caressing both her cheek and her knuckles.

'Wha…what happened?' she asked as her eyes slowly opened up, as they took in her surroundings.

'You passed out in the kitchen' he told her 'How are you feeling?' he asked her.

'Tired…very tired' she replied.

'The doctor said you passed out due to malnutrition…and stress' he added and Claire frowned looking away from him. She needed to look away. She couldn't handle the way he was looking at her, his eyes and voice full of concern and worry, like he cared about her.

'Did you eat anything today?' he asked when it was apparent that the silence was just going to remain hanging in the air if he didn't speak up. She looked at him as she appeared to think about it and then looked away 'And yesterday?' he asked curious and worried, wondering now how long it has been since she had something to eat, because it was becoming obvious that this was not the first time she skipped eating anything, but Claire didn't say anything.

'Jesus Claire, you can't skip eating. When was the last time you ate something?' he asked her, and Claire frowned not really sure now that he was asking. It wasn't a decision she had taken. It just happened. She was a very busy woman, she didn't always have time to eat. Most days she survives on coffee and the odd salad she manages to grab between meetings or appointments, and that was still while going through emails or jotting down some points for a meeting or doing a design. Frustrated, he ran his hand through his hair and then got up from the bed 'I am going to get you something to eat' he told her 'You want to wait for me here or do you want to come into the kitchen or stay on the couch?' he asked her.

'Couch' she replied, so Owen removed the sheets off her and helped her up in a sitting position but when Claire attempted to get up , her feet gave away again and she fell down on the bed again, Owen grabbing her arm immediately for support.

'Come here' he told her as he bent down and picked her up in his arms, her arms going round his neck instinctively.

'What are you doing?' she asked a little shocked.

'Carrying you downstairs' he simply replied 'You are to weak to go down the stairs. I'm not going to risk you falling' he went on as they exited her bedroom and started going down the stairs.

Feeling drained and completely exhausted, her eyes heavy, she let her head fall resting it on his shoulder, her nose practically in the crook of his neck, his scent filling every inch of her, Claire fell asleep in his arms again, and as Owen reached the couch, he was tempted to just sit down and enjoy having her in his arms. He craved holding her, being close to her and all he wanted to do right now was just stay in this moment but she needed to eat and get her health back, and he needed to make sure she gets better. Besides, there was no way he was going anywhere tonight. He couldn't just leave her alone, and it wasn't just because he wanted and needed to be close to her but also because of Madison. What if something happened to Claire during the night? What would Madison do? He was doing this for his daughter, at least that was the excuse he gave Jessica when he finally texted her that he was still at Claire's and that he was going to spend the night. Putting her concerns about their so called friendship or parenthood excuse she felt they were playing, the friend in Jessica came out concerned about her lifelong friend, but Owen assured her that she should be fine. He just needed to make sure she eats and get her strength back, and take her to see the doctor first thing in the morning, well that is after having a good breakfast and driving Madison off to school that is. He had already informed work and Barry that he needed to take an emergency leave before his wedding leave started, because Owen didn't feel the need to take a couple of days off before the wedding.

'Claire…' he whispered holding himself back from saying honey or baby or whatever was coming out of his mouth as he ran his hand down the side of her face trying to wake her up 'Wake up. You need to eat' he told her.

She whimpered in her sleep before she finally managed to open her eyes 'Mmm?' she asked, her eyes settling on Owen who was crouched down beside her.

'Food is ready. You need to eat' he told her as he tried to help her get up, and when her eyes finally settled on the big ice cream glass waiting for her full of vanilla ice cream, strawberries and panna, Claire gasped in shock before giving him a weak laugh, her eyes finally adjusting to the light in the room.

'What is all that?' she asked him weakly, as she sat more comfortably on the couch, her legs crossed and covered by a blanket.

'Your food' he simply replied as she watched him joining her on the couch with another glass just like the one she had waiting for her 'I suggest you start eating it before all the ice cream melts' he joked.

Claire couldn't help the faint smile on her face as she watched him indulge in what looked like a very delicious dessert. She had to admit, it was the perfect way to get her to eat something. It was late and therefore it was not the appropriate time to have a juicy burger, not that she has burgers very often but that was the first thing that came to her mind. Picking up the glass, she let the spoon dive into the ice cream and scooped up some before putting it in her mouth. She couldn't help the moan that escaped her mouth and Owen smiled as he watched her close his eyes, enjoying the taste and the feel of the cold ingredients in her mouth.

'Oh my God…this is…so good' she said with her mouth full.

'Glad you are enjoying it' he replied smiling, before they continued to eat in silence, both enjoying the treat and each other's company at the same time. It was only when Claire was finally finished with hers that Owen broke the silence, 'Are you still hungry? Do you want something else?' he asked her.

'No thanks, I'm fine, really' Claire tried to assure him, as she placed the glass on the coffee table. She shifted a little bit and Owen reached out spontaneously to help her out 'Thanks' she replied with a smile 'Are you nervous?' she asked him then, out of nowhere.

'What?' he asked her, not sure what she was talking about.

'The wedding? You're getting married the day after the tomorrow' she pointed out, and Owen shrugged 'What is that supposed to mean?' she asked him 'Come on Owen…you can tell me anything' she told him and Owen gave her a look.

'How I feel about the wedding is not something I am going to discuss with you Claire. I'm not that insensitive' he told her 'Coffee?' he asked as he got up from the couch, grabbed the empty dessert glasses and walked into the kitchen. He turned the water on and washed the glasses while Claire watched him, still in the same position on the couch.

'Sure' she replied, as she watched him turning the kettle on 'Come on Owen…it is fine really. You made your choice I can deal with that' she told him 'I'm not a child' she pointed out.

'I know you are not Claire. The truth is my situation is not an easy one even though it may seem like one for an outsider, but one of you is going to get hurt and I am dreading that' he admitted.

'I know you are and I know you don't want to hurt either me or Jess…but it is inevitable really' she told him with a shrug.

oooOOOooo

No one could have told him that two days before his wedding Owen was going to be sleeping in Claire's guest bedroom. She had protested of course, telling him he was exaggerating the situation and making a big deal out of nothing, not sure how she really felt about having him sleep over, especially two days before his wedding, as if the situation wasn't already a complicated one. Granted he was sleeping in the next room, but it still blew her mind. After all the ice cream and coffee she had, Claire couldn't sleep immediately, even though she was dead tired. All she could think about is Owen…Owen sleeping in the next room, and how if he had chosen to be with her, he would be sleeping next to her right now, his arms wrapped around her waist, her head resting on his shoulder, her hand on his chest. He was right. It was a complicated matter, and even though she wanted him to make his choice, and preferably pick her, she knew deep down that this must be really difficult for him. She really didn't want to be in his shoes right now. She wondered what he was thinking or if he had already fallen asleep. Does he think about her before he sleeps just like she does? She cannot help it. He seems to be on her mind all the time lately, even when she is asleep, her dreams are filled with Owen. If only those dreams would become a reality.

oooOOOooo

Owen kept tossing and turning and it wasn't because the bed was not comfortable but because his mind was racing, and he couldn't seem to slow him down. He kept thinking about the woman sleeping next door and how much he wished he could be there with her, in her bed, holding her in his arms, her body close to his, letting his nose smell the scent of her hair and that vanilla lotion she uses, mixed with a little bit of Claire.

Finding her unconscious earlier really shook him up. It was an image he couldn't seem to get rid of. He kept seeing her there, lying on the floor face down, her face pale. He kept thinking that this was all his fault. Sure she is a grown woman and knows that she needs to take care of herself and eat, and yes she is a very busy woman with being the Head of design at work and taking care of Madison, but Owen also feared that the added stress of the wedding and him being Madison's father and also Jessica's fiancé was not helping, and Owen knew that he needed to be careful with what he decides to do, even if in reality he already knows what he wants, he didn't want what happened today to influence him.

Pushing the covers off him with his legs, Owen got out of bed rubbing his face hard and made his way downstairs, opening the fridge first to take out a beer and then the front door and sat down on the steps leading to it. He looked up at the sky and wished he could see the stars above, shining so bright filling the sky with the most beautiful sparkly diamonds ever, but being in New York it wasn't that easy to see them with all the lights filling the city. Claire's house was right in the middle of it all.

He found himself flipping through the photos in the gallery of his phone, as he went through the many photos he seemed to have with both Claire and Madison, noticing how much photos of him and Jessica together have seemed to lacked. Before they used to take a photo every time they went out but ever since Madison walked into his life, his phone seemed to be filled with her photos…her and Claire. He stopped on the photos they had taken on that very first picnic, in the very first weekend together, and he couldn't help but smile as he recalled that day. All the fun and laughter they shared and how much they had enjoyed taking those photos together. He found himself laughing at certain photos, and then the photo were Claire is kissing him on the cheek came, and Owen couldn't seem to flip it over. His eyes stared at the way her hand rested on his thigh, her lips kissing his cheek, her eyes closed as she did while his cap covered most of her stunning red hair. They looked so happy in that photo…and they were. They had really enjoyed themselves that day and Owen wished he could take them there to that moment right now and re-live it one more time. He flipped to the next photo and the one where Claire has her eyes closed appeared and Owen smiled. This photo had really caught his attention that day. There was something beautiful about it.

Realizing that this was still not helping or maybe it was but just wasn't showing him what he wished it would, Owen got up and headed inside. He stopped to check in on Madison first just to make sure she was still sleeping soundly and still covered. He smiled as he watched his daughter sleeping, hugging her favourite toys, and then he realized…he could have this every night. He leaned down, kissed the top of her head and headed out, stopping in front of Claire's bedroom. Slowly he opened the door and walked inside to check on her. Claire was asleep facing his way and Owen sighed as his arm reached out on its own accord, his fingers brushing against the side of her face, enjoying the feel of her skin against his fingers as he pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. He leaned down and kissed her head first, and Claire stirred in her sleep, shifting a little bit turning on her back face up. He watched her for what seemed like forever, as his eyes took in every freckle on her nose and cheeks, the outline of her lips, and as he smiled at how beautiful she looked sleeping, Owen found he couldn't drag his eyes off her lips, and the next thing he knew, he was leaning down and kissing her lips. His eyes closed relishing the feel of her lips against his, trying with all his might to keep from groaning out and waking her up. He was about to pull away when Claire parted her lips and Owen found himself deepening the kiss instead, his hand now cupping her cheek and then he heard Claire moan and Owen pulled out of the kiss. He thought he was going to find Claire's eyes open but she was still asleep. Not risking it again, he turned around and walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.

This was going to be a long night.