Hi ya me again, sorry it's been so long but with Christmas and being in the hospital I haven't had much free time to do anything. Apparently after a seizure I have a bad attitude, I actually told a paramedic to 'f-k off and let me sleep', it was a shame I had to have a seizure at 2:00 in the morning on Christmas day. Yes I am an epileptic, great gift to give my parents yay!
Anyway hope you like it so far 'cause I'm loving this, I need to say that I have finally got Lily's real name although I don't know if it is right, but it will either be in this chapter or the next I don't know yet just bare with me ok. The rating has gone to R because there may be a lime in the next chapter and if you're good I may even put in a lemon, I've had the idea already, there is also some negative adult scenes coming up, a bit of a beating for someone. I've even changed the title a bit…Oh god and more insight into the past!
Warning: hint of rape and other adult scenes
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"Speech"
Thoughts
'Exclamation'
Julian thinking
Yue thinking
(Author's note)
(Author's note with sarcasm)
/Lyrics shortened to satisfy T+C/
Hidden Lives, Hidden Destiny Chapter 1
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(Dranzer's POV)
I've been viewed as a bad person, I've been viewed as a hateful person, though I've never been viewed as a misunderstood person, but what ticks me off, what really gets on my nerves is being viewed as an attractive servant worth only for loyalty and a good fuck. That has got to be the most hateful thing a man could have said about a woman. But I'm used to it, I've been used to it for far too long.
Back when I was young I had given up my life for my family, I gave up my childhood so that my older brother Dragoon and my younger brothers Drigger and Draciel could live their young lives free from hardship and pain, I gave up my childhood so they could keep theirs. By the time that they grew up enough to be seen as adults by father it was like I was the eldest child even though my brother Dragoon was 'born' first. I say words like this about the 'born' part because we had no mother to be 'born' by. Our creator or 'father' as he liked us to call him by created us. He cloned his DNA to create my brothers, but to make me he mixed his DNA with that of a phoenix Shugo-Juu called Fenikkusu, he had apparently fallen for before she had apparently tried to attack Dragoon when he was only 3. I don't understand why father did that; all I know is that he made me different from the others. While they were fighting guardians, now known as bit-beasts, I was half bit-beast half Shugo-Juu or 'hanyou'. This was a secret so hidden that only 11 people knew of it. My father and me obviously, my brothers, My daughter Lily and her father, Clow who I think knows, my beat friend Meiran, Mitsunobu Ryers my master that I had at the time I was able to see Yue, and Renji Matsue my master before Mitsunobu. 'HE' is one of those men who called me what I said earlier 'only worth for loyalty and a good fuck' although the term loyalty was used harshly. As I was passed down from generation to generation I found that I was passed to male descendants and most used me for more than for protection and public entertainment (fights), I was also used for more personal, intimate entertainment.
That's right I was raped, raped by most of my masters. Violated to the core by all means necessary, I guess that's why I ran from that white haired angel winged man that found me the day before I found out I was being passed down again. At least that new master ended up being better than all the rest.
I feel such a fool for running away like that but I was so scared of all men's touch. I ran to the park nearby where I eventually ran into my brother Dragoon, for a minute I was as scared of him as I was of the stranger I had just run away from, but I soon calmed down when I recognized his aura and simply cried into his chest as he was taller than me. About a few seconds after it seemed he was arguing with someone but I was too shut in my own pain and fears that I did not care, I could not care.
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(Normal POV (Earlier))
Kero sat on the windowsill in Sakura's bedroom watching the sunrise. He and his brother Yue had not long had an argument about the past.
(Flashback)
"Kero why is Yue so quiet and his feelings are so hidden from everyone?" Sakura Avalon asked breaking the silence, she had some last minute vacation work to do, at the minute she was doing Math and because she was still not getting it she had to study hard, although she was getting a lot better.
"Hard to say," Kero replied from his drawer, "Yue's always been quiet, but when he was young he was very playful, he loved winter, always playing in the snow and throwing snowballs at me and Clow." Sakura laughed at this "what, he really did do that, me and Clow never liked to be around him when he had that mischievous look on his face, the only one who liked winter as much as he did was Dranzer, but she is long gone" he flinched as he realised what he had just said.
"Who's Dranzer, Kero" Sakura asked forgetting her homework and turned to face Kero better "and what happened to her".
Kero realised he could not lie to her "She was the guardian of an old friend of Clow's, she and Yue got real close. But then something happened and she got Clow really angry and he eventually got rid of her, Yue didn't take it well" Kero got out of the drawer and out of the room to go downstairs to the fridge as he was hungry, knowing very well that Tori and Julian were in Tori's room studying (they also didn't finish their homework for tomorrow), Julian had already accepted Yue and told everyone he knew about Kero and of Sakura's powers (Tori already knew remember).
"WHAT, you mean he killed her!" Sakura shouted, loud enough for Tori and Julian to hear, who quietly went to the door to listen, then sneaked downstairs to hear the rest of the conversation behind the kitchen door.
Kero looked out of the fridge appalled, "No way Clow would never do anything like that, he only sent her away and I haven't seen her in over 1000 years". He put his head back in the fridge, "good riddance to bad rubbish that's all I can say".
Sakura was confused "how can someone so close to Yue be hated by you Kero" now angry "how can you be so inconsiderate to this Dranzer woman when all I hear from you is that she loved winter as much as Yue did and that they were friends."
"And she did something that made Clow very mad" Kero retorted.
"What?"
"I told you she did something that made Clow angry and that was why he sent her away. I don't know what it was but whatever it was, it was enough for me to hate her".
(In the hallway)
Tori looked at Julian only to find that his eyes were a silvery purple colour, looking angry and he had his fists clenched tight and shaking in anger. How dare he, how dare he say that about her
(In the kitchen)
"That's not fair Kero judging someone by one thing they did"
"But that's not all Sakura, Dranzer had a conflicting aura, one side good, one side bad. I think she was an evil demon trying to get close to Yue so that she could trick and kill him and Clow and me"
"HOW DARE YOU SAY SUCH A THING KEROBEROS WHEN YOU DON'T GIVE THE SHOWRON CLAN A CHANCE WHEN THEY BECAME FRIENDS WITH THE MISTRESS!" Kero and Sakura looked towards the kitchen door, which had just been slammed open by none other than Yue, pissed off and ready for a fight with a confused and scared Tori behind him (You'll never see that again). "How dare you be a hypocrite when you don't even know what it was all about"
"That demon had you so wrapped around her fingers that you were too blind to see what she was really doing." Kero snorted and turned back to the fridge, however Yue grabbed Kero by the tail and threw him out the open window, VERY FAR! He then left the house through the front and flew away.
(End of flashback)
'Yue's right, I just hated Dranzer because of that incident with Clow, we were all friends before that. It seemed that she loved me like I was her brother and I treated her like dirt just now. What the hell did she do to Clow to make him so mad.' Kero then flew to his drawer and tried to go to sleep (he'd been awake all night).
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(First day of school)
Sayuri Oran was waiting in the reception area of Tomoeda Community College (How very original), watching students go by and waiting to see the principle.
(Sayuri's POV)
Hiding, always hiding. If it had not been for Clow's warnings, I would have shouted on a mountains edge at the top of my lungs that I was in love with Yue Reed and for all others to back off. Yes, Yue and I are lovers, it took us a couple of years but we finally got together after we talked long about a sensitive subject and an innocent kiss that turned out to be not so innocent, but we did not go THAT far. We didn't sleep together for another 3 months, by which time I think Clow loathed me like the plague even though he did not show it. I already knew that Clow had deep feelings for his guardian but Yue never returned the same feelings, because Yue's heart had already belonged to me. Eventually Clow's jealousy had overcome his true nature and he beat me until I was nearly dead, he then sent me away with a letter. That was the last time I saw Yue face to face, but my love for him grows stronger the longer we are apart.
I will never forget the day when I was sent back to my master through magic like I was nothing but trash. He was well surprised when I appeared before him all bloodied up and not moving, my hair turned almost white in fear, he was so angry. My master was one of the very few who actually cared about me and how I felt. He called in my friends to help him look after me day and night until I was completely healed, but it was at this point that I discovered that I was with child.
(Normal POV)
"Miss Oran, the principle will see you now" the secretary called. Sayuri stood up and quietly walked into the principles office. Out of the darkness and into the danger.
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(Later)
Keroberos is so immature, how can he hate someone so nice because of something so pathetic
What was pathetic?
Clow's jealousy
What! Yue still had not calmed down after that incident last night so it was a little difficult for Julian to keep his mood happy at college, now that Yue had taken over and taken refuge at Tokyo tower, Julian was once again trying to calm his true form down.
Clow was jealous because I liked Dranzer more than him
But everyone and even you said that you cared deeply for Clow. Where did all of this come from?
It turns out that there was some sort of spell that was put on us when we were released from the book. Eli, I presume, cast a spell on us so that I would forget about her, and whenever I transformed into you, in a way, you forgot what happened while I was in control, so to speak.
So how come you remember now?
Because when we disintegrated the barrier between our minds, the spell Eli put on me also disintegrated.
Oh ok. What did Clow do with Dranzer anyway?
He beat her until she was near death then sent her back to her own master with a letter for her to never see me again
Did her master know about Dranzer and you then?
Yes
I never knew Clow was like that
Neither did I Yue looked up at the waning moon and wondered where Dranzer was now, was she even alive?
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Wow that was so deep even I didn't know what was going on. It's kind of scary, and it's intensified by me listening to the beauty and the beast soundtrack and steps, yes some of those Disney songs can be tense and thrilling at the same time, especially beauty and the beast, steps too even though that is not Disney.
The next chapter will be darker than this one and is nearly finished so I will be updating again before the morning.
R+R plz