Jaune and Courage the Cowardly Dog
Chap 55: 1000 years of Courage
"P-U2" Eustace said into the microphone.
"Oh, my. That's me." Muriel said as she stamped the bingo sheet in front of her.
"I wonder what the prize is." Neptune said as he leaned back in the chair.
"It's a secret." I told them smiling.
"Whatever it is. It's ours." Sun said after scanning his bingo sheet and stamping the correct spot.
We were in the dining room playing bingo. Two brand new faces were with us this time. And they were Sun Wukong and Neptune Vasilias. Two best friends. I only saw them a few times while I was at Beacon and not for very long. Apparently though, they done away with wanting to be huntsmen and opened up their own investigation agency. And after hearing the stories and adventures from the others, they decided for their first case to investigate the strange place known as Nowhere.
"Though I do hope you and Neptune don't try and mess with me again." Sun said annoyed which Neptune, Courage and I snickered. Apparently, Neptune had learned from overhearing Nora that Courage can speak. Yet only a few an actually understand him. So, obviously, we decided to do the same to Neptune that Courage and I did to Blake when we were in New York.
"TV-Y7" Eustace told us the next number.
'Aha!' Courage cheered as he stamped the number on his sheet.
"So how did you adjust to all the strangeness here? I'm pretty sure that we would have lost our minds after the first few times." Neptune asked.
"I have no idea." I answered.
"NC-17." Eustace told us the next number.
"BINGO!" Muriel shouted in joy.
"So." Sun began leaning back into the chair. "When do you think the next crazy adventure and weird thing will happen?"
"I have no idea. But I fell it will come soon." I answered.
And how right I was
"AAAHHHHH!" We all screamed as we were tossed to the wall. And not only that, we were spinning around extremely fast. So fast that we were stuck against the wall and could not move. Had we been able to think, we would have asked how this happened.
Ten Minutes Later
"OOH!" We all moaned nauseously. We were in the upstairs bathroom with green faces. Trying not to vomit everything we had the past year out. Though, for Courage, he could not hold it back much longer and threw up in the toilet.
"Oh, my/" Muriel said worried for Courage.
"What just happened?" Sun asked using the sink to stand up as he did not trust his legs yet.
"Maybe there is a report." I suggested.
We all nodded and went downstairs. Albeit slowly as we were still on shaky legs. Thankfully, after getting downstairs, Muriel went into the kitchen and made us some tea to help settle our stomachs. Which we were all thankful for. Eusatce then sat down on his chair and turned on the television. But all that it showed was static. He flipped through the channels yet static was all that was shown.
"Eustace, can you find the news? Maybe the world's ended?" Muriel asked worried and nervous.
"Worse than that. Ain't nothing on." Eustace answered.
"Maybe the antenna broke off. You better go check." Muriel told him.
"I've been wondering about that darn antenna. AAHHHH!" Eustace muttered before screaming when he opened the door to reveal a mountain of dirt that than fell on him.
"Wow. How did that happen?" Sun said surprised.
"Must have been quite a dust storm." Muriel said as she opened the curtains of a window and saw that it was covered in mountains of dirt.
"We better check it out." I said moving to the pile of dirt that covered Eustace.
'Here you go.' Courage said as he handed me a miners hat,
"Mind if we tag along?" Neptune asked.
"Sure." I answered as Courage handed them some hats. Though only Neptune put that hat on. Going over to the dirt. Courage began to dig a path for us all the way to the surface. Yet, to our surprise, it took us about ten minutes to get to. Even with Courage's amazing digging speed.
'Huh?' Courage asked when we finally reached the surface. Looking around, we saw that we were no longer in a desert but a luscious land full of grass and trees with ponds nearby.
"Um, correct me if I'm wrong but weren't we just in a desert?" Neptune asked confused.
"Yeah. Where could we be?" I asked looking around clueless on where we are.
"Neat. A banana." Sun suddenly said. Looking towards him, we saw that indeed there was a lone banana nearby.
"I would leave that alone Sun." I advised him.
"We don't know where we are. For all we know, that banana could be poisonous." Neptune added concerned.
"Ah, you guys worry too much. What's the harm in eating a banana?" He countered before picking up the banana. He licked his lips and were about to peel it when a face on the banana suddenly appeared.
"What the?" Neptune asked confused and weirded out.
'YEE!' Courage shrieked scared.
"WAHHHH!" The banana started scream.
"SUN! DROP IT!" I quickly told him. But before he could even react, another voice spoke up.
"LET GO OFF MY BABY!" The voice demanded.
"Huh?" Sun asked confused. We turned around and saw another banana standing behind him. This one being the mother to the other banana which was apparently a baby.
"LET GO OFF MY BABY!" She demanded again before hitting Sun a few times with her purse.
"Here you go." Sun said dazed as he handed the baby back to its mother.
"Sorry for the misunderstanding mam." I told her nervously.
"But we best be going." Neptune added as we slowly backed away.
We then without thinking dove back into the hole we came out of. Only to be reminded of how deep it was when we fell for a solid ten seconds. And had we not had our aura; we would most likely have died. Shaking off the fall, we got up and went back inside the house.
"What happened? Is everything alright?" Muriel asked seeing our ragged state.
'Strange banana.' Courage answered pointing to the entrance.
"Sissy dog." Eustace mocked.
"You know, I always thought the others were exaggerating about him but I now can say with confidence that they were right." Neptune said glaring at Eustace.
"Um, I think you both should come and see for yourselves." I told them. Muriel Eustace looked at each other for a moment before turning back to us.
"All right. We'll come and see." Muriel said as they came near us.
"Watch your steps." I warned them as we made our way up the tunnel back to the surface. Soon enough, we were back at the surface.
"I have a feeling we are not in Kansas anymore. Or in the present time. Or some combination of the two." Muriel said as she climbed out of the hole.
"Kansas?" Neptune asked confused.
"The state we live in." I answered only to receive and an even more confused look from him. "I'll explain later."
"Now what?" Sun asked. But before either of us could answer, a familiar voice called out.
"They are the ones who tried to eat my baby." The banana mother exclaimed while pointing to us. Behind her were two more bananas wearing police uniforms.
'AAHHHH!' Courage screamed in terror.
"Where's the eats?" Eustace asked oblivious to what was happening.
"RUN!" I shouted as the police bananas neared us.
Not needing to be told twice, the rest listened and we turned around and ran as fast as we could. Courage had picked up Muriel and Eustace so we could run even faster. We did not stop running even though we had no idea where we were. After a couple of minutes, we saw buildings nearby. Had we not been running we would have noticed that the buildings look like bananas. As we entered the town and passed the buildings, we looked for a place to lose our pursuers.
"QUICK! BEHIND THAT DUMPSTER!" Neptune shouted pointing to a dumpster. We nodded and went behind it. Taking a peek around the corner, I saw the police and lady bananas pass us without knowing that we were here.
"Okay. Their gone. We're safe." I said when the bananas were far enough that they would not hear us.
'Getting heavy.' Courage as the he struggled to hold both Muriel and Eustace. He then collapsed under the weight.
"You stupid dog." Eustace insulted.
"Definitely not Kansas." Muriel added still usure of what to make of the situation.
"You okay Courage?" I asked as I helped him and Muriel up.
'Fine.' He answered.
"Hey. A newspaper. Maybe it could give us some useful information." Sun said pointing to one behind me. Curious, I picked it up and began to read it for anything useful. And what I found was troubling.
"Oh, this isn't good." I said with my face nearly going white.
'AAAHHHHH!' Courage screamed as well.
"Is something wrong?" Muriel asked.
"Sure, is something wrong." Eustace said as he took the paper. "Eight million dollars for a salami."
"Really, That's what's wrong for you. Have you not been paying attention?" Sun all but shouted.
"No. That's not it. Look at the date. April fifteen. Three thousand and one. It's nearly a thousand years into the future." Muriel said reading the date. At this revelation, Courage screamed like a horse before passing out.
"How did that happen?" Sun asked.
"Well, whatever caused us to go spinning is probably what caused it." Neptune answered.
"Well, either way, we need to find a way to get back." Sun said.
"How? First, we are in an unknown land. We, mainly Sun though, is wanted by the police who are out looking for us." I asked. But it seemed as fate favored us today.
"Psst." A voice suddenly whispered getting out attention. Looking over to where it came from, we saw another banana. However, this one seemed familiar.
'Oh, right. We saw him in front of the pentagon. How did he get back to our time and get back here to this time though?' I mentally wondered.
"What do you want?" Neptune asked as he held back Sun who was now looking up and down the banana. At this, Courage also woke up.
"Come here. I got something for all of you." He answered.
"Like what?" I asked curious.
"You all look like you could use some new clothes. Something to fit in. Know what I mean?" He answered.
"Not really." Muriel said confused.
"You know. Something to make you 'fit in.'" He explained.
'I don't trust this. We should go.' Courage said tugging on Muriel's arm to try and get her to follow but failed in doing so.
"I always do like to fit in." Muriel told the banana.
"Then fit into this." The banana said as he showed us a rusty old and worn banana suit.
"Why, that's lovely. Ow much is it if you don't mind me asking?" Muriel asked.
"How much do you got?" The banana asked.
"I don't have any money on me." Muriel answered.
"Ain't got none either." Eustace said showing us his empty pockets. Though we all know that he wouldn't have given any if he did have. They then turned to us.
"Sorry." I said shrugging while Neptune and Sun did the same. We then turned to Courage.
'Well, don't look at me.' He told us.
"What you got to trade?" He asked.
"He's like a black-market dealer." Neptune whispered to me which I just nodded in agreement.
'Let's see.' Courage answered as he began to dig around his pockets. He then pulled out a whale followed by an accordion and an anchor.
"How did he pull all that out?" Sun asked surprised as we saw the banana start put the whale and accordion into his own pockets. But couldn't do the same with the anchor.
'NO!' Courage screamed while hugging the anchor.
"Ok, kid. You drive a hard bargain." The banana said before giving us the banana suits. One for each of us.
Few Moments Later
"Ugh. This is itchy." Sun complained as he put the suit on.
"Well, they do say you are what you eat Sun. And it looks that is true as you are now a banana." Neptune joked.
"Ha, ha, ha. That was so funny I forgot how to laugh." Sun said fake laughing. At this, I remembered something.
"Better hide your tail as well Sun." I told him.
"Why?" He asked suspiciously.
"Because we are trying to blend in. And your tail could give us away easily as while they are looking for all of us. You are the main one they are looking for." I explained.
"Right. Give me a second." He said as he moved to the side to put his tail into the suit.
'Do you hear that?' Courage suddenly asked.
"Music. But sounds festive. Wonder what the situation calls for." I wondered.
"Probably a party or holiday." Sun suggested returning.
"Careful." Neptune suddenly said while pointing behind us. Turning around, we saw a group of bananas heading towards us.
"Oh, my." Muriel gasped when the bananas passed us.
'Should we follow?' Courage asked.
"Probably. If anything, we might find something useful that would get us back to our correct timeline." I answered. We then began to follow the rest of the bananas deeper into town. After a few minutes, we saw all the bananas gather around a stage.
"Must be something important going on." Muriel said as we saw a banana with a red cape walk onto the stage. "He must be the top banana."
"Fellow ripe bananas of the great banana republic. Are we at the peak of perfection?" The top banana asked.
"YEAH!" Every other banana cheered.
"Seeing all these bananas is making me hungry." Sun said as his stomach let out a small rumble.
"Don't even think about it Sun." Neptune warned.
"Then join me. And let us journey to bananahalla." The top banana exclaimed with every other banana cheering.
"Bananahalla? What's that?" Neptune asked.
"I heard of Valhalla. Which is where warriors of a certain religion go to after they die. Maybe this is their version of that." I suggested.
"In bananahalla, all your questions will be answered." The top banana conveniently added before stepping down from the stage.
"Maybe if we follow the top banana to bananahalla, our questions can be answered. And we'll find out how to get back home." Muriel suggested.
"Yeah. And where to find some eats." Eustace added.
"Has there ever been a time where he ever cared for anyone aside from himself?" Neptune asked as we began to follow the rest of the bananas to bananahalla.
"Nope. The only time he actually did something nice was because of a curse and the fact that he did not have glasses." I answered.
"Sounds like an interesting story for another time." Sun chimed in. I nodded as we had more important things on our minds right now. Such as listening to the top banana.
"My ripe-and-ready friends. We have arrived." The top banana declared.
"YEAH!" The bananas cheered.
"This is bananahalla." The top banana said while raising his hands in a grand gesture to the building behind him.
"Seems more like a palace for a royal family." Neptune said examining the building.
"Isn't this grand?" Muriel asked excitedly. "Soon our questions will be answered and we'll be on our way home."
'Ungh.' Courage grunted as he started to bounce up and down.
"You shouldn't have drunk all that soda." Muriel lightly chided.
"Neither should I had that banana smoothie." Sun added as he started to get the same urge.
"You'll both find the little banana's room over there." The top banana told us as he walked up to us.
"Thank you." Sun said before he and Courage ran over to where the top banana pointed. Neptune and I looked at each other before following them. And once we reached them, we saw them staring confused at the doors.
"Um, which is for men?" Sun asked as he looked back and forth between the doors.
"I... have no idea." I answered as I looked at the doors and only saw a banana as the sign for which bathroom is for which.
'I'll try this one.' Courage said as he used the one on the left. Only for screams and sounds of getting hit came instantly with Courage coming out a moment later.
"Wrong one?" I asked chuckling at Courage's red face. Sun and Neptune were also snickering.
"Guess this is the right one." Sun said as he entered the bathroom.
'Might as use it as well.' I thought as me and Neptune went into the bathroom as well.
'Ooh.' Courage whined when we reached him as he scratched his head in confusion. Looking around, we saw toilets stalls in the shape of bananas. But they seemed to be in use. Turning around, we saw some holes in the ground instead of urinals.
"Um, are we supposed to just use those holes?" Sun asked confused.
"I guess." Neptune answered as Courage already tried to use it. But before either of us could, a voice spoke up behind us.
"You know, kid." The voice spoke.
'AAHHHH!' Courage gasped in shock. Turning around, we saw the same banana from earlier that gave us our suits.
"Ever heard of privacy?" Sun asked quickly fixing himself.
"I really wanted that anchor." The banana told Courage while ignoring what Sun said.
'Oh, no.' Courage gasped in terror.
"You're not getting it." I said stepping between him and Courage.
"Want me to expose all of you." The banana threatened.
'Fine.' Courage said as he took out the anchor.
"Very fine. Ok. Thanks." The banana said as he put it in his coat. He then put his 'hand' on Courage. "I like you kid. But you're a witness. So down the drain you go."
'AAAHHHH!' Courage screamed in fear.
"COURAGE!" I shouted when the banana threw him down the drain. Neptune and Sun even took out their weapons. Yet to our surprise, he was gone.
"Certainly, matches a black-market dealer." Neptune said as he put his weapon away.
"But how are we going to get Courage back?" I asked as I kneeled down and try to spot Courage.
"I have no- oh, there he is." Sun began but stopped when Courage popped back up from the drain.
"You okay Courage?" I asked as I helped him out.
'Yeah. But I saw something.' He answered nervously.
"What did you see?" Sun asked as he stepped out of the stalls.
'Down that drain I somehow got into bananhalla and saw that it was a trap.' He answered.
"What kind of trap?" I asked concerned and curious.
'Banana goes in and giant monkey peels and eat them.' He explained while acting like a monkey.
"How is that a problem?" Sun asked irked.
"Bananas are the people here Sun. And the monkey that Courage said is eating them. Meaning his is killing them." I explained.
"Oh. Right." Sun said embarrassed that he did not understand the situation immediately.
"Wait. Your folks are dressed as bananas and want to get in bananahlla. They could get eaten as well." Neptune suddenly said realizing it.
"Crap. Come on. We have to get them." I said as we immediately rushed out of the bathroom. Looking around, we spotted Muriel and Eustace near the gate. Sighing in relief that they had not gone in yet, we raced over to them.
"Did you all find the bathroom?" Muriel asked as we reached them.
'Big trouble. Monkey eating banana people.' Courage answered before acting like a monkey that was peeling a banana.
"Bananahalla is not what we think it is Muriel. It's something worse." I told her.
"Well, I hoped you wash all your hands when you were done." Muriel said completely understanding what we just told her.
'Ungh.' Courage whined as he began to pull on Muriel and Eustace's hand.
"Muriel. We don't think that Bananahalla is what it really is." Neptune told her.
"I think it's better if we leave right now." Sun added.
"Come on Muriel. Let's just go." I told her hoping she would listen.
"I know your all eager to get to our time. But first we have to go through the doors and ask how." She told us.
"Stupid dog." Eustace said as he slapped Courage's hands away.
'What do we do? What do we do?' Courage asked panicking. The doors soon opened with Muriel and Eustace walking in.
"Any ideas Jaune?" Neptune asked looking around. I was about to answer when we overheard some banana's talking.
"Wait till we catch that baby robber." A banana shouted. Looking towards where it came from, we some a group of bananas holding up a wanted poster of all of us. Though, Sun was circled as to indicate the one most wanted out of all of us.
"You both thinking what I'm thinking?" I asked Courage and Neptune. They smiled and nodded before we turned to Sun.
"What?" He asked confused.
"Sorry about this Sun." Neptune said smiling. He seemed confused but then realized what we meant when we ripped his suit off.
"OVER HERE!" We all shouted getting the groups attention as we also ripped our own suits off.
"I hate you all." Sun grumbled.
"There they are. The baby robbers." The bananas exclaimed before running towards us.
'Follow me.' Courage said before turning around and running away. We did not need to be told twice and followed him.
"Where are you all going?" Muriel shouted towards us as we passed her and Eustace.
We ignored Muriel, something that I did not like to do and continued to follow Courage. After a few minutes of running and following courage, we made it to an ornate side building to bananahalla. Entering the doors, we continued to follow courage to some ornate doors. Opening them, we saw the top banana resting on a couch.
'Help. Help. Help.' Courage begged as he grabbed the top banana.
'Damn it. We're trapped.' I thought as the sounds of the bananas chasing us grew louder.
"Ha, ha, ha." Eustace laughed as he led the bananas to us.
"Of course, he led them to us." I said bitterly.
"Anyone could have seen that coming." Neptune whispered while glaring at Eustace.
"Any other brilliant ideas?" Sun asked looking around for an escape without harming the bananas.
"I'm thinking." I answered while looking around hoping for an exit. Luckily, it came in an unexpected way.
'Please help.' Courage begged while squeezing the top banana even tighter. And to our surprise, it was revealed that it was only a monkey wearing a costume.
"That was not at all what I was expecting." I said surprised.
'Same.' Courage agreed while he examined the banana costume.
"Yet. I have a strong feeling that isn't the most surprising thing either of you have ever seen." Neptune added while never taking his eyes off the monkey who was looking around in worry.
"Get back. Get back or I'll say something nasty." Muriel said as she pushed her way through the crowd to then stand in front of us.
"Does she actually think that might work?" Sun asked confused.
"She is very pure Sun." I explained.
"The dog isn't our enemy." One banana suddenly exclaimed.
"Yes, it is. Yes, it is." Eustace said trying to convince them.
"NO! IT'S THAT MONKEY!" The same banana declared.
"OH, NO!" The monkey declared before running off with the crowd chasing him.
"I can be feisty when I have to be." Muriel told us proudly.
"Good call on hiding my tail Jaune. Even though it hurts a bit having it in this costume." Sun told me.
"No problem." I replied.
"Should we go check on them?" Neptune asked. We nodded and ran after the groups of bananas and single monkey. Luckily, they didn't get far and managed to corner the monkey in front of the gates to what he said was 'bananahalla.'
"Okay. I am a monkey." The monkey said when we neared the group. It then turned to open the gates of Bananahalla to reveal a giant monkey holding a bowl with ice cream and a single banana in it. "But it wasn't my idea. It was my uncle's idea."
"That is one big monkey." Sun said surprised.
'CHARGE!' Courage suddenly shouted. Turning to him, we saw that he was wearing armor and had a flag that had a symbol of a banana on it.
"Uh-oh." The monkey exclaimed worried as he looked at the banana in his bowl as the other bananas were charging at him.
"HALLELUJAH!" The bananas in the bowl exclaimed as the other bananas quickly toppled and overcame the giant monkey.
"I am so glad they don't know I am a monkey." Sun said surprised at how easily they took down the giant monkey.
"HEY! THAT KID HAS A TAIL LIKE THAT SMALL MONKEY! HE MUST BE IN ON IT AS WELL!" A banana yelled getting the other bananas attention.
"Damn it." Sun muttered before running away from the bananas now chasing him.
"Should we go help him?" Neptune asked. Courage and I both thought on it for a second before shaking our heads and deciding to just watch the show of bananas getting revenge on him for all the bananas he eaten.
Two Hours Later
"You guys could have helped you know." Sun said irritated as he nursed the few remaining bruises he had when the bananas finally caught him.
"And miss the show. Nope." I replied.
"Quiet. The show is about to start." Neptune said pointing to the curtains on stage,
We were in a theater in the v.i.p. seats. It was two hours since the bananas learned the truth and subdued the giant monkey and little monkey. They also apologized to Sun when they realized he wasn't in on the plan. Currently, we were waiting to see what kind of punishment the bananas came up with for the monkeys. After a moment, the lights turned off with the curtains parting to show the two monkeys. The giant one operating a giant music box while the smaller one danced around in a funny suit with a cup. Needless to say, we all found it funny.
"Well, this is all well and good. But how do we all get back to our time?" Muriel asked.
'I have a feeling in a similar way we got here.' I thought worried as we continued to watch the show.
One hour later
"AAAHHHH!" We all screamed as the house spun much like it did earlier in the day. Except only in reverse. Yet, it was no less nauseating for all of us. With each of us this time throwing up.
Ten Minutes Later
"B-47. C-23. R-19." Eusatce said into the microphone.
"BINGO! BINGO! BINGO!" Muriel exclaimed happily as she won the game.
"So close." Sun complained.
"Just one off." Neptune said smiling. We were back in the dining room continuing our game of bingo where we left off. After making sure we no longer need to be next to the toilet and after Muriel made us some tea to help with our upset stomachs.
"All right Muriel. You won the prize." Eustace said annoyed as he placed a giant pile of bananas onto the table.
"What's wrong Sun?" I asked as I took a banana.
"Not hungry for a delicious banana?" Neptune joked.
"Yeah. After what happened and me nearly eating a baby banana, I'm taking a break from anything that involves bananas." He answered.
"So, that means you won't be having of my banana bread recipe or Courage's recipe for banana deserts?" I asked. Hearing this, his eyes widen with some droll coming out of his mouth.
"On, second thought. Maybe I could have some bananas." He said while taking a banana hesitantly. We just chuckled at his expression. But we all froze when we heard something familiar.
"Psst." The voice said. Looking over to Courage, we saw that the banana he peeled continued the miniature form of the banana that sold us the banana suits. "Come here. I got something for you."
'AAHHHH!' Courage screamed in fear while Sun looked queasy before setting down his banana.
'Great, not again.' I thought hoping that we would not get sent into the future again. As I don't think my stomach could handle that.
Note:
(1) Courage meets the Mummy with Ruby. (2) The Transplant with Terra, Saphron and Adrian. (3) McPhearsome Phantom with Blake, Kali and Ghira. (4) Aqua Farmer with Blake, Kali and Ghira. (5) Food of the dragon with Blake, Kali and Ghira (6) Journey to the center of Nowhere with Peach (7) Heads of Beef with Sun and Neptune.