December 2001
After several minutes of hugging Harry, Hermione pulled away, carefully unwrapping her arms from around his neck. Harry took a small step backward but kept his hands on her.
She was too embarrassed to look Harry in the eye, so instead, spoke to the lapels of his dress robes. "I'm sorry," she said as she wiped her eyes. "I shouldn't have yelled or said any of the things I did. I'm just-"
"It's okay," he cut in.
She finally looked up at him. He was wearing a worried expression. "You forgive people too easily," she told him.
"Maybe. But I think I know what this was about."
"Oh?" Hermione tried to step back out of his grasp but he tightened his grip on her, keeping her in place. Did he know? If he did, he wouldn't still be holding her like this, right? Wouldn't he push her away?
The way he was touching her now - his hands on her sides, fingers spread across her back - this wasn't normal for friends, right? Neville would never hold her like this. Had they always been this affectionate with each other? Sort of, but it had certainly increased in the past few months. And now that she knew, it seemed excessive.
Did that mean he liked her back? No. He was just a very affectionate person, at least with the few people he was comfortable around. It was understandable since he'd been so starved for love as a child.
When Harry finally responded he spoke carefully, like he was nervous his words were going to upset her.
"I know your parents are a really sensitive subject for you. And for some reason when you get overwhelmed with all those memories you sort of disappear into yourself and push everyone away. It was like that on your birthday and tonight it's been the same. I get it, Hermione. I've done my fair share of pushing people away too."
Hermione dropped his gaze and looked back down at his robes. "Oh. Right."
"I didn't mean to upset you, really, I-"
"No, it's not that," she rushed to reassure him. "I just thought you were going to say something else."
"What?" He was eying her warily again.
She forced a smile on her face. "I thought you were going to guess that it was my time of the month," she quipped.
Harry nodded seriously. "The thought did cross my mind."
She gave him a playful shove and he finally released her. She took the opportunity to put more distance between them.
"I'm okay, really. You can go."
"I think I should stay," he countered, "just for a little while longer."
"I'm a nutter, Harry. If you stay I'll probably hex you. Leave now while you still can."
"You'll try to hex me but we've proven on multiple occasions that I have better reflexes." His expression sobered and he added tentatively, "I mean, I don't want to be a bother but-"
"You're not," Hermione said quickly. She'd clearly hurt him with her earlier words. "Like I said, I didn't mean any of that nonsense."
"Okay. Then let me stay and we'll watch television for a bit. I don't want that depressing opera to be the last thing playing through your mind before you go to sleep."
"It wasn't depressing. It had a happy ending," Hermione pointed out.
"It upset you. I'm calling that depressing."
Hermione gave him a small smile, then realized she was nervously playing with her hair. She was one eyelash bat away from becoming another one of Harry Potter's adoring fans. Good Lord.
"Okay. I'll go change," she announced, turning on her toe and disappearing into her bedroom.
Harry sighed and began unbuttoning his outer robes. Damn, that had been close. The whole thing, from the anger, to the yelling and telling him to leave, to the weird close moment, had all been related to her parents. He knew the thought of them made her a little nuts sometimes but he'd forgotten momentarily and made it about him.
Thank Merlin he'd recovered in time. What would have happened if he'd kissed her? She was sad and vulnerable and he'd almost taken advantage of the situation. That wasn't very chivalrous of him. Godric Gryffindor was probably banging his head against the edge of the veil in protest.
Harry tossed his robes over the chair and untied his tie, then undid the top few buttons of his shirt before going to the sofa and flipping through the channels, looking for something that would cheer Hermione up.
When Hermione came back into the room, she leaned against the wall and watched Harry for a few moments. He was staring distantly just past the television, which was muted, and she saw he'd removed his outer robes and tie. She'd thought before he only looked handsome because he was dressed up but even now, he looked good. Very good. She sort of wished he'd gone ahead and taken his shirt off too.
Okay. That's enough.
Harry spotted her and smiled. She stayed leaning against the wall, waiting for the flush in her cheeks to go away before she went to join him on the sofa.
"Hi," she said softly.
He was giving her 'the look' and now, knowing what she knew about her feelings toward him, it made her more flustered than it ever had before. Her blush deepened. So much for that plan.
She crossed her arms over her chest. "You can't possibly think I look pretty right now."
He leaned back and crossed his arms, matching her pose. "Why not?"
"My eyes are all puffy from crying, there's still a bit of makeup smeared under them, my hair is tangled and messy, and I'm in pajamas."
"I see that. I happen to like penguins."
She looked down at the little penguins on her pajama bottoms and shook her head, then went to join him on the sofa. "How do you know you like them?" she asked. "Have you ever seen a penguin?"
Harry thought about it. "I have. The Dursleys took me to the zoo once, just before I started at Hogwarts. And I saw them again when I took Teddy a few months ago."
"Bollocks!"
"What?" He reached for his wand, which was lying on the edge of the coffee table closest to Hermione. She placed a hand on his arm.
"Stand down, Auror Potter. It's just - I forgot to ask about your cousin. How did lunch go? Damn. I really am the worst friend."
"You're not. I already listed all the reasons why tonight, but I can repeat them, maybe with less shouting, if you need."
She groaned and buried her face in her hands. "No. I'm good."
"Don't worry about it, Hermione. Anyway, lunch was good. He's a bit crass and says and thinks the opposite of what I would in any given situation, but it was...nice. I think I'll do it again."
Hermione peeked through the gaps in her fingers at him. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. And it wouldn't have happened if not for you," he said, nudging her leg with his knee. "You are a good friend. Even if you go a bit mad when it's your time on the month."
She rolled her eyes and looked at the television which was currently playing a commercial. "What did you pick?"
"There's a fantasy movie on."
"Brilliant! I love those. Is it one we've seen?"
Hermione enjoyed watching Muggle movies about the magical world. She had a lot of fun noting all the errors and inconsistencies with their rules of magic. Sometimes, a movie would come along that was eerily accurate, but those were rare.
"We haven't seen this one. It has dragons, though."
"Is there other magic? Does anyone use wands? What about potions?"
"I literally saw a dragon and just stopped there."
"Okay. I guess we'll see."
Harry pulled the blanket off the back of the sofa and draped it around his legs. He held it open for Hermione but she hesitated.
"What?" he asked. "Do you want me to get your scarf too?"
"No. Uh. I had a thought."
Harry nodded for her to continue.
"We always fight over the blanket but we've never considered duplicating it. I know the spell would only last a few hours, but that's all we would need."
Harry nodded thoughtfully. "We could do that. But my wand is all the way over there and we both know you're incredibly lazy, so you'll be no help." He nodded down at the blanket he was still holding open for her.
Her lips turned up and she sat there for a few more seconds before finally giving in and joining him under the blanket. A few minutes later, she leaned against him since she was a little cold. A few minutes after that, she laid her head on his shoulder.
This was allowed, she decided, since she'd done this before. That was where she was drawing the line. Novel acts of affection, like kissing and such, were off limits, but things like this that were comforting and familiar; she could keep these going. Harry seemed to be okay with it and that was good enough for her.
When Hermione laid her head on Harry's shoulder, he had to resist the urge to turn his head and kiss the top of it. After a few minutes, he felt tears on his shirt and turned to see them silently falling down her face. Harry guessed she was still upset about her parents. He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer. It was allowed, he decided, because he was comforting her.
Hermione wasn't crying about her parents. It was her thoughts of Harry that were making her cry.
She was in love with Harry. Of course she was. Half the female population was in love with Harry. No, she corrected, they were in love with Harry Potter, not Harry. Those witches didn't even know Harry and in that way, she was different from them.
They read bland facts about him in articles like how he enjoyed watching Quidditch, had an owl named Hermes, and that his favorite subject in school had been Defense Against the Dark Arts.
They didn't know that he liked to eat exotic foods in an act of defiance against his aunt and uncle. They didn't know he was uneasy around small dogs but that giant dogs were no problem for him or that his greatest fear, which used to be dementors, had shifted somewhere along the way to loneliness.
Those witches didn't know that he valued his spot on a chocolate frog card far above his Order of Merlin, that he'd taken the whole Black fortune Sirius had left for him and put it aside for Teddy, or that one of his greatest possessions was a photo album of his parents that he kept on top of his bedside table.
They didn't know the difference between his real smiles and his camera smiles, or how his eyes were brightest when he was laughing with Teddy, or how the quickest way to get them to darken was to insult one of his friends.
Hermione got to know all of that and more and that set her apart from those desperate witches. Harry told her his secrets, hopes, plans, and fears. They'd seen each other at their best moments and their worst. And occasionally, she got to snuggle up with him on the sofa and watch the telly. She got all of that and no other witch did and Hermione knew she would never do anything to lose this privilege. And that was why she couldn't tell him about these feelings.
She wondered if maybe he suspected. After the night he'd stayed here and slept in her bed, he'd pulled away. He'd tried to put distance between them and even stopped telling her she was beautiful. That's why he'd been so nervous about telling her that everyone thought they were dating. He was worried that for her, the feelings were real.
But then she'd convinced him they could just be friends and they'd sorted it out. Hermione didn't want to give Harry any reasons to go back to that 'pushing her away' phase. The feelings would pass, they had to, because Hermione wasn't the type of witch Harry Potter was going to end up with.
Hermione didn't move away from Harry until the movie ended and even then, she did so reluctantly. It was time for Harry to go but she had one thing she needed to get off her mind if she had any chance of sleeping tonight.
"I have a question."
Harry pushed the blanket off and turned to face her. "Okay."
"There was a witch at the opera…" she started, then let her voice trail off.
"There were loads of witches there."
"Yeah. There was one you were talking to before the show started. I thought I recognized her but couldn't remember where I'd met her."
"That was one of your healers from St. Mungo's. Agatha."
"Oh. That's where I knew her from." Hermione bit her lip and looked down at her lap. "You didn't brush her off," she said softly.
"No. I didn't. It turns out she had something interesting to say."
"Oh." Tears stung Hermione's eyes and she quickly blinked them back.
Harry placed a hand over one of hers. "She was talking about you."
"Me?"
Harry nodded.
"Oh."
"Are you jealous?" he asked with a hint of amusement.
She finally looked back up at him and waved dismissively. "Of course not. I'm happy for you. And a Mediwitch, that's a good match, especially given how accident prone you are."
She forced a smile on her face but Harry didn't return it. He pulled his hand away from hers and pinched the bridge of his nose as he leaned back on the sofa.
"It was one conversation - about you. I'm not going to drop by St. Mungo's and ask her out or anything. Why do you want me to find another girlfriend so badly?"
"I don't. I just want you to be happy."
Harry let out a long sigh and she nudged his leg with her hand. Harry caught her hand and turned it face up on his knee, then started playing with her fingers. Not this again.
"I am happy," he said distantly as he looked down at their hands.
"You don't look happy."
His eyes snapped to hers and he gave her a small smile. "It's hard for me to be happy when you're not. But generally, when you're smiling and don't look this depressed, I'm happy. I promise."
Her heart leapt. Dammit. There was no way these feelings were going to go away soon. She squeezed his hand before pulling hers away. "We should turn in. I mean, I should turn in and you should go home."
"I can stay," he offered. "Here on the sofa, I mean. Just in case."
"I'm okay."
"Fine." He stood and grabbed his wand, then went to get his robes. "Send a Patronus tomorrow morning. If I don't get it by eight, I'll assume you're too sad to make one and stop by."
She nodded as she stood to join him. "Thanks again, Harry. I thought tonight I was going to watch a Wampus kitten wreak havoc on innocent opera goers, but it turns out I was the one who did that."
"I know you can't control your hormones."
She picked up a small candle and threw it at him. He caught it easily.
"Wow, you do have good reflexes."
Harry smiled and put the candle on the side table. He had his robes over his arm and turned to her, waiting expectantly, like he wanted to give her time to change her mind.
And she wanted to. She wanted him to stay, not just on the sofa, but in her bed. She wanted to see him without his glasses and watch him sleep. She wanted to trace her fingers along the lines of his face and fall asleep while holding his hand. And when she woke up tomorrow morning, she wanted Harry to be the first thing she saw.
But Hermione couldn't do any of that. Harry was the most important person in her life and she couldn't do anything to lose him. So she took a deep breath and said evenly, "Good night, Harry."
"Good night, Hermione."
It was Christmas Eve and Hermione and Ginny were sitting on the floor near the Christmas tree at The Burrow, playing with Teddy. Actually, calling it "playing" was a stretch. He was creating a tower out of blocks and anytime Ginny or Hermione tried to help, he told them they were doing it wrong. But if it seemed like their attention was drifting too far away from him, he'd call them back and insist they help.
"So you'll be with your parents for the next week," Ginny was saying. "How are you feeling about that?"
Hermione shrugged. There wasn't much to say. It was going to be hard. She wished she weren't going alone but she'd never got around to inviting the only person she wanted there with her. At the beginning of the month, before the opera, she was going to ask Harry to come for a few days. She knew it was a lot to ask but also knew he'd agree in an instant.
Then, she'd figured out she loved him and had decided that maybe some time away from Harry halfway around the globe would be good for her. But this morning, while she was packing to leave tonight, she'd panicked slightly. Ron used to always go with her to Australia. Her birthday was the first time she'd been back alone but that had only been for a few days. This would be almost an entire week.
When Hermione had visited Godric's Hollow with Harry before coming over here tonight, he'd noticed something was wrong and even guessed correctly that it was about her parents. She'd brushed him off, pointing out that the trip was about his parents, not hers.
Hermione focused back on Ginny. "Let's talk about you," Hermione said. "How's Ruby?"
"Good, last I checked. But after tonight…"
"Oh, right. She's coming over tonight. When?" Hermione looked around the crowded room for Ruby's dark hair.
"Later, and only for an hour. I think that should be plenty of time for her to get a sense of how chaotic my family is. She's met everyone in a smaller setting but this will be the first time she's seeing them all together."
Hermione nodded knowingly. For anyone not used to it, she imagined meeting the Weasleys all at once, especially now that there were several small children in the mix, would be a lot.
"I've been thinking about you, Ginny, and what you've gone through this year."
"Yeah?"
"You know I was cross with you when you first told me."
Ginny cringed. "Yeah but I was expecting that and I deserved it. I was awful to Harry." Ginny had known from the start that if Hermione was ever faced with a decision between Ginny and Harry, she'd choose Harry every time.
Hermione picked up one of Teddy's blocks and began tapping it on the ground. "Yeah. But he's forgiven you so I don't know why I shouldn't. Anyway, I was going to say something else. The fact that you discovered this huge truth about yourself that was previously hidden. That's a big deal. I bet it's been really scary and jarring and I'm sorry you were going through most of it alone. I just - I'm proud of you."
Ginny smiled widely. "You're making me blush. Thanks, Hermione. You know I love you, right? Not romantically or anything. You're not my type, no offense."
Hermione was about to retort when Teddy added his voice to the conversation.
"Ginny loves Miney. Harry loves Miney," he said absently.
"What?" Hermione asked. She scanned the room for Harry and spotted him near the sofa across the room, engrossed in what looked like a serious conversation with Bill. Hermione guessed it was about work.
"What was that, Teddy?" Ginny asked.
"Harry loves Miney," he replied matter-of-factly, keeping his eyes on his blocks. "Harry's sad and Teddy's happy and Harry has a bubble wand like Miney."
Ginny raised her eyebrows at Hermione.
"What? I know Harry loves me. I love him too. That's not news."
Ginny sharpened her glare. "In what context would Harry tell Teddy that he loved you?"
Hermione shrugged and went to grab another block. She'd rather make a tower than have this conversation, and with Ginny of all people.
"Harry does this thing where he tells Teddy everything going on in his life. Maybe he realized he's in love with you and told Teddy, then told him he was sad about it because he doesn't think you like him back."
Hermione scoffed but on the inside, her heart was racing. "You're just blowing it out of proportion because you want Harry to move on so you can feel less guilty about what you did," Hermione snapped.
Ginny glowered at her and turned back to Teddy. "Teddy, when did Harry tell you that? That he loves Hermione?"
"Yesterday." Teddy turned and saw Hermione's small tower. "No, not there! Over here!" He pushed it over and started pulling the blocks she'd been playing with towards him.
Hermione became very engrossed in helping him. Ginny shook her head. Hermione was in serious denial and she figured Harry was still doing the thing where he waited around for the other person to make a move. Ginny decided it was time to take matters into her own hands.
She dismissed herself and Hermione was relieved to see her go. Ginny looked around the room until she spotted George laughing with Angelina, Charlie, and Ron about something. She marched over to the group and told George she needed to speak with him privately.
"What's this about?" George asked when they got outside. The quiet of the snowy night was deafening compared to the noise inside. Ginny took a second to revel in it.
"Do you remember the mistle-dove?"
"Of course. Flying mistletoe that attacks the couple until they kiss. Too bad I never managed to get it to stop targeting family members. And now with same-sex couples, that's a whole other complication."
Ginny let that comment slide. "Do you still have it?" she pressed.
George narrowed his eyes at her. "I was told to destroy it. I believe you yourself said if you ever saw it again, you'd cast, and I'm paraphrasing here, a new hex you'd learned that removed men's bollocks."
Ginny couldn't help but smirk. "I know you still have it and I'm guessing it's in your room. You need to get it out and target Harry and Hermione. They need to kiss before she leaves for Australia in a few hours."
"Your ex-boyfriend and your best friend? I'm intrigued."
"Can you do it or not?"
"You know I can," he said with a wicked smile.
Hermione grabbed Harry later as he was returning from the kitchen. "Are you ready for your gift?" She was holding a box wrapped in red paper.
"Oh. Yeah. Let me get mine." He walked into the Sitting Room and Summoned Hermione's gift from under the tree. It was adorned with gold wrapping and was similar in size to her gift. They leaned against the back of the sofa and swapped presents.
"Very Gryffindor," Hermione said as she noted the colors they'd chosen.
Harry smiled. "You go first."
Hermione burst into laughter as soon as she opened the lid of the box. "Open yours," she insisted.
Harry soon saw why she was laughing so much. "Did we seriously get each other the same thing?" he asked as he lifted a Kitchen Blunder Detector from his box.
"I don't need mine. That failed pie was your fault."
"Oh, yeah right," Harry retorted. "I-" he was interrupted by a vaguely familiar cooing sound. They both looked up and spotted the flying mistletoe George had unleashed on the house last year.
"George! I thought this was banned!" Hermione cried, looking around the room for him.
"Oh, shoot!" George called from the doorway. "It must have escaped from my room. Sorry, guys.
"Can you get it out of here?" Hermione asked, clearly irritated.
"You know how he gets when he's targeted someone. Just kiss to calm him down, then I'll lock him up."
The strange looking leafy bird started pecking at Hermione's arm. "I know you have a way to deactivate it."
George shrugged and the bird's pecks became more violent. Hermione shook it away. "If you want me to kiss him, you need to give me space!" she scolded.
The bird flew back up above Harry and Hermione's heads. Hermione took a breath and turned back to face Harry.
"Hi," she said, trying to hide how nervous she was. Was she really going to have to do this right now? She was going to kill Ginny. This had her name written all over it.
"Hi," he said with a small, apologetic smile. "Sorry about this."
Hermione shrugged and muttered under her breath, "It could be worse. I was talking to Arthur just before I went to find you."
Harry let out a small laugh. They both stayed in place, each hesitant to be the first one to lean in. The dove cooed again and Hermione shook her head. She knew it was best not to overthink it. It would just be a quick brush of the lips and then they could send the meddlesome bird away. She wished she could kiss Harry on the cheek but they'd learned last year the bird demanded kisses on the mouth.
Hermione leaned toward Harry but lost her nerve when she was just a few inches away from him and stopped. He closed the remaining distance between them slowly and deliberately, then softly pressed his lips against hers.
Hermione had planned to pull back as soon as their lips touched, since that's all the bird needed, but in that moment, she'd forgotten all about the bird and the fact that they were in a room full of Weasleys. All she was thinking was that she was kissing Harry.
It felt so significant, like the culmination of years of hugs that had lasted too long, lingering glances from across the room, hand holding, playful nudges, cuddling, breathing in each other's scent. It had all been leading to this moment. She felt like she'd found the solution to a problem she didn't even know she'd been trying to solve.
So, instead of pulling away, Hermione closed her eyes, placed a hand behind Harry's neck and opened her mouth slightly as she leaned further into him. She wanted more. She wanted to wrap her other hand around him, to open her mouth further and deepen the kiss, but she heard a peal of laughter and was reminded they were being watched. This had already gone on for too long.
She dropped her hand from his neck and tried to lean back but Harry moved with her. He pressed his lips into hers, then opened his mouth and ever so slightly sucked on her bottom lip before finally leaning back.
When Hermione opened her eyes again, she saw Harry looked just as surprised as she was. He'd kissed her. She'd been trying to pull away and he hadn't let her. He'd kissed her back and from the look in his eyes now, she thought he wanted to do it again.
She didn't know how long they stood there staring at each other. It felt like ages but was probably only a few seconds. Her heart was pounding so hard that the sound of it blocked out the commotion around them. Hermione felt a hand on hers. Harry had reached out and taken it.
The bird cooed again and Hermione looked up and scowled at it. "Shoo! You got what you wanted!"
Harry was opening his mouth to say something when Teddy appeared, throwing his arms around his legs. Harry stumbled and grabbed the back of the sofa to keep from falling over.
"Bye, Harry! It's bedtime and tomorrow is Christmas!"
Harry crouched down next to Teddy. "Is it Christmas tomorrow? Are you sure?"
"Yes! Gran said so."
Harry's eyes flashed up to meet Andromeda's. "I think your gran is going to have a time of winding you down tonight. Good luck to her."
Harry bade Teddy and Andromeda farewell and worked out a time to arrive at their house in the morning to watch Teddy open presents. When they had left, he turned back to Hermione but she was gone. He scanned the room for her but didn't see her curly hair in the sea of red.
While Harry had been talking to Andromeda and Teddy, Hermione had snuck off to the loo. As soon as she left, George took her spot and grabbed the leafy bird before it could target another couple. "Okay, little guy. You've done enough today."
George spotted Ginny at the edge of the room near the fireplace and went to join her. "Well? What did you think, sis?"
Her eyes were sparkling. "You saw it, right?"
George cocked his head to the doorway to where Ron was leaning against the doorframe, frowning as he stared at the spot Hermione had recently occupied. "I wasn't the only one who saw it," George muttered under his breath. "I hope you know what you're doing here, Gin."
She waved him away. "He'll be fine. Now get rid of that thing. For good this time," she added warningly.
For the next hour, Harry tried to get Hermione alone again but it was like the entire room was conspiring to keep them apart. He'd just managed to extricate himself from a conversation with Molly and Percy and had broken into one between Hermione and Charlie. Luckily, after just a few moments, Charlie excused himself and Harry and Hermione were finally alone.
Harry was about to lean in and say, "You kissed me back." After an hour of deliberation, this was the best thing he had come up with. He was still in shock from the kiss and his brain wasn't working at full capacity.
Before Harry got a chance to say anything, Ron joined them. "All set for Australia, Hermione?" Ron asked.
Hermione looked down at her watch as she nodded. "My Portkey's leaving in fifteen minutes. I should probably start saying goodbye to everyone."
"Your stuff is in Ginny's room, right?" Harry asked. "I'll meet you up there, after you're done with your rounds."
"Yeah, me too," Ron added.
Harry could sense an edge in his tone and pointedly avoided Ron's gaze.
"Sure. I'll see you two up there."
Ten minutes later, Hermione was in Ginny's room with Harry and Ron. She'd retrieved the Portkey from her bag, a small clock, and placed it on Ginny's bed.
"When are you getting back?" Harry asked.
"New Year's Eve. I don't want to miss Hannah's party."
"Yeah," Harry smiled. He was trying to think of ways he could get Ron to leave but nothing was coming to mind.
"Are you going to be okay there alone?" Ron asked.
She waved dismissively. "Yeah, I'll be fine."
"I thought Harry was going to go. What happened to that plan?"
"Wait, what?" Harry snapped his head toward Hermione. She was looking down at the Portkey, obviously embarrassed.
"I was going to ask you earlier in the month but I changed my mind," she mumbled.
Harry reached out and touched her arm. "Why? What changed?"
Everything. She forced a smile on her face before looking up at Harry. "I decided that I need to learn how to do this alone. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine."
"I can go with you," he said, tightening his grip on her arm. "I can take this Portkey with you, now."
"You can't do that, Harry. You haven't packed, for one, and you have Christmas with Teddy tomorrow."
"I'll come after," he insisted.
"By the time you manage to get a Portkey to Australia, I'll be back."
"Maybe if I do it the legal way," he challenged.
Ron raised his eyebrows. Harry seemed unusually desperate to join Hermione on this trip.
"I'm fine, really," she said with a smile.
Harry moved his hand down to hold hers and pressed his thumb into her palm. She got the feeling he was trying to tell her something.
"I think it's good for you to go alone," Ron announced. Hermione drew her eyes away from Harry's to focus on Ron.
"Yeah, I think you're right," she agreed.
"Send me a Patronus the second you're back, okay?" Harry said. He was still holding her hand tightly.
"Yeah. I will."
"Me too," Ron added, eying Harry and Hermione's clasped hands.
Hermione turned to Ron and smiled. "Yes, of course. I'll send both of you a Patronus when I'm back in London."
Ron placed a hand on Hermione's shoulder. "If things go bad, leave a message on the mobile phone in the Auror office. You still have the number?"
She nodded. Harry had almost forgotten about that phone. They used it to communicate with a few of their informants and he remembered Hermione telling him once that Robards let her use it to call her parents. He wondered if her parents' number was still on the phone. Or maybe Ron knew it but Harry knew asking Ron for it would be a bad idea.
"Thanks, Ron. I have it."
Hermione pulled her hand out of Harry's and gave Ron a quick hug, wishing him a Happy Christmas. Then she turned to Harry.
He told her with his eyes that she was beautiful. Her lips turned up slightly. Then Harry pulled her into a hug and whispered in her ear, "I'm going to miss you, Sunshine."
For some reason, that brought tears to Hermione's eyes. Once she pulled away from Harry, she dropped her head so neither boy would see. She took a deep breath and picked up her bag. She was about to reach for the clock when she realized Harry was still holding her arm.
She looked over at him and he was watching her expectantly. She could tell he was waiting to see if she'd change her mind about him coming with her. "I'm going to be fine, really."
When Harry finally let go of her, she didn't waste any time in touching the clock, knowing if she lingered too long she wouldn't be able to make herself leave Harry behind. And now, more than ever, she needed time away to figure out what was going on between them. There was a familiar tug behind her navel and she was gone.
Harry stood watching the spot where she'd been standing. He could feel Ron's eyes on him.
"You and Hermione," Ron said in a low voice. "What's going on there?"
Harry decided playing dumb was the best course of action here. "What?"
"I thought she was like a sister to you."
And with those words, they were back in the Forest of Dean, having just watched Ron's deepest fear (Hermione choosing Harry over him) play out. It was the only time Harry had ever referred to Hermione as a sister and even in the moment, it had felt wrong. But he'd known it was what Ron needed to hear and he'd been so relieved to have him back.
"I meant that when I said it," Harry said carefully.
"And now you feel differently?"
Harry decided that now was not the best time to point out that Ron had a girlfriend and that he and Hermione had broken up months ago. He said instead, "I'm just worried about her. You didn't see it but she was a mess after that last trip. And we went to an opera a few weeks ago that reminded her of them and she was a mess after that too. I don't think she's ready for this."
"Hermione can take care of herself," Ron scoffed. "She doesn't need you saving her."
Harry didn't rise to the bait. "You're right."
Ron held Harry's gaze for several more seconds, his blue eyes fierce, then he dropped his head and rubbed his face with his hand. "I should go back," he groaned, then straightened. "Are you coming by tomorrow?"
"Yeah, probably." But first, Harry was going to stop by the Auror Offices and check that phone for any Australian numbers.
"Okay. I'll see you then."
As soon as Ron left, the tension in the room went with him. Harry hadn't noticed how heavy it was until it was gone. He sighed and sat on the edge of the bed, dropping his head into his hands.
This thing with Ron was going to be a disaster. No, Harry was getting ahead of himself. Maybe Hermione hadn't kissed him back. She was pretty clumsy. Maybe she'd lost her footing and just fell into him and he'd misinterpreted the situation. Then when he'd kissed her back, she'd freaked out. She had disappeared right after. And why had she told Ron she was going to ask Harry to join her in Australia, then changed her mind?
"Hey."
He looked up and saw Ginny leaning in the doorway. "Hey, Gin."
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah." Harry dropped his face back into his hands. A few moments later he felt the weight of the mattress shifting as Ginny joined him on the bed.
They sat there in silence for a long while until Ginny placed a hand on Harry's arm and said gently, "She's not going to make the first move. She's too insecure. I know you are too and you're also used to having witches throw themselves at you, but Hermione is never going to do that. If you want her, you're going to have to make it happen."
Harry kept his head down. Of course Ginny knew. How long had she known? Had she just figured it out today when she saw them kiss? How had that kiss looked to others? Ron had clearly picked up on something, so it must have looked as meaningful as it had felt.
He considered denying Ginny's assumption but knew it was futile. He turned his head and saw her watching him.
"What if she pushes me away?" he whispered. "Or worse, what if she gives me a pitying look and lets me down gently? What if - what if she doesn't like me that way?"
A slow smile began to spread across Ginny's face. She leaned into him and said hopefully, "What if she does?"
Over the next week, Harry checked the mobile phone in the Auror Office obsessively but there were no messages from Hermione. On Christmas Day, after visiting with Andromeda and Teddy, he'd stopped by when the office was empty and checked the recent list of outgoing calls for any Australian numbers. He didn't find any.
If he had found the number, would he have used it? Did he really want his next conversation with Hermione to happen over a phone? And what, exactly, was he planning to say to her? That part he still hadn't worked out.
Harry was currently with Dawlish, standing at the edge of the woods outside an abandoned castle. A small group of Dark Magic enthusiasts were supposed to be meeting here later to work on developing new dark spells. Although the meeting wasn't set to start for another two hours, there were Aurors surrounding the property so they could watch and catalogue everyone's arrival and be sure of exactly who was inside before starting their raid.
It was then that Harry received Hermione's Patronus, letting him know she was back in town and "perfectly fine, honest." Exactly fifty-three seconds after the silver otter disappeared, Harry was knocking on Hermione's door.
It took her a minute to answer. She looked surprised, initially, then broke into a smile. That was a good sign.
Harry stepped forward and placed his hands on either side of her face as he drank her in. "You look beautiful."
"And you look like you're working."
"I am. Or - I should be. But I had to see you."
"Yeah?"
Harry nodded and started to lean toward her, then hesitated. What was wrong with him? Why was it that he had no fear about the raid in a few hours but the thought of kissing Hermione terrified him?
But Ginny was right. If this was going to happen, he would have to make the first move. Even now, Hermione was looking at him curiously, like she wasn't sure what he was going to do next. He knew if he waited for her to take the initiative, he'd be waiting for a long time. And he was so fucking sick of waiting.
With his hands still cupping her face, he swallowed his doubt, summoned every ounce of courage he could find, and kissed her.
Hermione didn't push him away. Rather, she placed her hands on Harry's shoulders and pulled him closer to her, which was all the encouragement he needed.
Harry wrapped his arms around Hermione and pushed her into the flat, kicking the door closed behind him as he continued to kiss her steadily, slowly exploring her mouth. Her lips were soft and warm and moved perfectly in sync with his. It was like they were meant to be doing this the whole time.
When he had to pull away for air, he stayed close and rested his forehead against hers, worried if he let her get too far away, they'd lose this and go back to dancing around each other. Hermione linked her hands behind his neck and started playing with his hair while Harry moved his hands to her back and drew her closer.
It was Hermione who resumed their kiss. She kissed the side of Harry's mouth first, which made him smile. Then, she peppered kisses along the length of his grin before pressing herself against him and pushing her tongue into his mouth.
If Harry's mouth hadn't been otherwise occupied, he would have whooped with excitement. There was no denying it now. She was definitely kissing him back, like, a lot. The first kiss had been soft and tentative but this one was all passion and, unfortunately, was cut short.
An alarm went off on the wand in Harry's pocket. He swore and pulled back, giving her an apologetic smile. "I have to get back to work. I shouldn't even be here now. Dawlish gave me five minutes," he explained.
"Oh. Yeah. You should - you should go," she said, slightly breathless.
He reached out and stroked her cheek. "That's what I wanted our first kiss to be like, by the way. If we hadn't been surrounded by Weasleys."
"It was good."
"Yeah? I feel like I'm being graded."
"Oh, well, if you want a grade, I'd say that was an A."
"An A?!" he exclaimed, affronted. "Acceptable? That was much better than Acceptable."
Hermione tried to suppress a smirk as she patted him on the chest. "It was just a first kiss or, second, technically. There's plenty of time for improvement."
"Tonight at Hannah's party we're going to continue this. I'm going to earn that O."
Hermione cocked her eyebrow. "That could be taken one of two ways."
Harry's heart almost leapt out of his chest. He leaned in and kissed the spot under her ear, smiling when her breath hitched, then purred, "I meant it both ways."
She shoved him away playfully and raised her hands to her cheeks. "You're making me blush."
"You started it," Harry replied, grinning widely. How had he become this lucky? Just a few weeks ago he'd been agonizing over her, convinced she'd never return his feelings and now they were snogging and making suggestive jokes.
Harry checked his watch and sighed. "Okay, Korma. This was supposed to be five minutes and I'm up to seven. If I don't leave now, I'm going to be fired."
He leaned in and gave her one last kiss on the cheek. He would never get tired of doing that. "I'll see you tonight. I'll be the one pulling you into the storeroom."
"Until then, Biryani," she said with a wicked smile.
Harry pulled his wand out of his robes and tried to focus on his destination. He'd had a lot of difficult apparitions in his life - the one with Dumbledore in Sixth Year being the most notable - but leaving Hermione right then and going back to the castle where he'd left Dawlish was the hardest one yet.