Petal in the Rain

Chapter 16 - Rising from the Ashes (Part 2)

"It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change."
-Darwin

Lily sat on one of the window sills in her octagonal dormitory room and watched the orange sun rise over the horizon, its light stretching towards the banks of the lake that rested before the regal steps of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry—an expansive, antediluvian castle secretly nestled in the Scottish highlands. Further to the west was a mysterious forest that stretched miles back into fogged hills, a little wooden cottage with an overgrown lettuce garden and thatched roof situated just before its tree line.

She closed her eyes, breathing in the fresh air that floated in from the grounds. It was hard to believe that only a day ago she had been at St. Madeline's, plotting a way to escape the school after two intruders—what she knew now to be death eaters—had come to kidnap her. Her, Lily Evans, an orphaned schoolgirl of no consequence or importance.

At least that's who she'd thought she was.

In virtually a day, Lily's world had been turned upside down, the only truth she'd ever known shattered to reveal she'd been living a concealed existence—a half life—ignorant of her heritage and hidden from the world where she rightly belonged. It was all because a dark wizard—Voldemort—believed she had the power to destroy him.

The unfathomable madness of the past day had left her here, a quiet dormitory room located in one of the multiple towers of a magic castle. Lily had a new identity, a new disguise, and was now surviving in an entirely foreign world filled with mythical people and creatures she'd once thought only existed in fairy tales.

How am I going to pull this off?

A small knock sounded at the dormitory door, breaking Lily from her thoughts. Clenching her satin robe close to her body, Lily crossed the room and opened it, staring expectantly into the stone hallway. She frowned. Nobody was there.

"Good morning, Lady Rockford," a tiny voice peeped, making her jump nearly a foot into the air.

Below her stood a female house-elf dressed in a clean dish towel patterned with daisies. The long-eared creature held a tremendously large tray—blatantly ill-suited to her small proportions—overflowing with tea pots and china plates filled with assorted breakfast foods.

"H-H-Hello," Lily stammered back, trying to regain her senses. She didn't know what would take more getting used to: talking to little storybook elves or being referred to by a different, completely fictional name.

"P-Pardon if Mimi has disturbed. Master Dumbledore sends his apologies for not being able to join M-Mistress for breakfast, as he is d-dining with another guest. He requests you meet him in the Transfiguration classroom at 10 o'clock this morning for a s-special appointment," Mimi the house-elf reiterated, nervous around Hogwarts' newest resident. "W-Where would Mistress like Mimi to set down her breakfast?"

Lily suddenly felt panicked. "Oh lord, I don't know where that classroom is! It would probably take me hours just to figure out where the front door of the castle is, never mind a classroom I've never seen before."

"Not to worry, Mistress! Someone will be waiting down in the Gryffindor common room to escort you there," Mimi said assuredly, suddenly looking stricken. "My apologies if Mimi upset Lady Rockford..."

"Don't apologize, Mimi. You didn't upset me...it's just going to take me a while to get used to all this," Lily motioned her hands around the room in slight exasperation. "Between you and I...I'm not very good at the whole magic thing just yet."

Mimi looked simply appalled.

"Lady Rockford is a great witch; this Mimi is sure of," the house-elf squeaked in an insistent voice, her eyes shining in adoration. "Lady Rockford is, after all, the niece of Lord Dumbledore, the greatest wizard of all time!"

House-elves are so peculiar...

"That's very kind of you to say, Mimi. And please, call me Lil—Aurora," Lily crouched down, giving the dumbfounded house-elf a sincere look; she was actually starting to think, despite their pointy ears and globular eyes, house-elves were sort of cute. "That's what my friends call me."

Mimi looked on the verge of dropping the oversized tray she carried, her skinny arms trembling so terribly that the dishes chattered. Large crocodile tears welled, about to spill over onto her wrinkled cheeks.

"M-Mistress considers Mimi a-a-a friend?" the house-elf stuttered.

Lily questioned why the house-elf was so stupefied by the notion. She wondered if it was against some magical code for wizards to be friends with house-elves.

I really need to start this magical education...

"I would like to be your friend. I could certainly use your help getting adjusted to Hogwarts," Lily said earnestly, her brow crinkling as she watched the house-elf steadily become more unhinged. "As long as it doesn't jeopardize your job here or something...?"

Mimi paused, setting down Lily's breakfast on the trunk by her bed and jumping up onto her mattress. The emotional creature sat there for a moment, bony legs dangling over the side of the bed, staring at Lily as if she were a goddess incarnate. Before she spoke again, she dabbed the corners of her wet eyes with the towel she wore.

"Lady Rockford is truly more wonderful than Lord Dumbledore has described," Mimi whispered, blowing her noise on her tea towel; Lily cringed, but hid it with an awkward smile. "Mimi would be honoured to be Lady Rockford's f-f-friend."

Lily smiled, sitting on the bed next to the small critter. "I'm glad. Now remember Mimi, my friends call me Aurora. Do you think you can manage that?"

"Y-y-yes, Miss Aurora," Mimi gulped, breaking into a misshapen smile; Lily tried to stifle her laughter at the crookedness of the elf's grin.

"That's close enough," Lily patted the elf on the back. "Well, I suppose I'll eat this delicious breakfast you've brought me and then get changed."

"Mimi is having your clothing laundered, Miss Aurora. You will find some new clothing in the trunk in front of your bed," the house-elf explained, her squeaky voice sounding a little more confident than before. "Mimi apologizes if Miss Aurora does not like the clothing, but Master Dumbledore informed Mimi that Miss Aurora will be going to Hogsmeade village to choose new clothing this afternoon."

"Oh...perfect," Lily strained to smile, the thought of having to adorn wizarding clothing suddenly making her tense.

Dumbledore was wearing bright purple robes with stars on them when I last saw him...

Once Mimi left, Lily crossed the large, stone room clad in dark cerise and gold banners and washed up in the marble bathroom. After experimenting with some of the shampoos and soaps in the shower, she crossed the room and opened her trunk to find some clothing. With a pang of emotion, Lily noticed the trunk was etched with the carving of a lily. Traditionally, one's initials were found on the lid of a trunk, but it was obvious Dumbledore had found a clever way of making her feel special.

"How thoughtful," she whispered, carefully running her fingers along the pretty flower.

Lily pried open the lid and pulled on one of the simple dresses she found within the trunk—a white, knee-length frock with a collar that buttoned up the front. Looking at herself in the ornate mirror propped near the wall, she frowned. It was a very conservative dress.

At least it doesn't have any purple stars...

"Lovely!" the opulent mirror cooed at Lily in a thick Parisian accent, giving her a fright. "Just az' a proper lady should dress!"

Lily looked around her room for the owner of the disembodied voice, then approached the floor-length mirror to inspect it. Puzzled, Lily checked the back of the mirror and experimentally knocked on the reflective glass.

"Would you kindly stop zat?" the mirror demanded haughtily, sounding frazzled.

"Er—sorry," Lily murmured, stepping away from the mirror.

Why should I be surprised that the mirrors talk, too?

Lily continued to fidget in her garment, attempting to flatten the creases. Between her clothing and newly-changed hair and eye colour, she could barely recognize herself.

Stubbornly, Lily undid three buttons at the top of her dress and pulled off her white stockings, which she found constricting and oppressive in the summer heat. She let out her hair from the bun it was in and messed it up a bit, letting the loose waves fall around her shoulders.

"Oh my..." the mirror gasped, sounding scandalized with Lily's touch-up.

After picking at her breakfast, Lily descended the spiral staircase into the tower's common room, a spacious area littered with crimson and gold furniture. On one side of the room was a grand fireplace surrounded by squashy armchairs and coffee tables, while on the other was bookshelves and writing desks. A yellow banner was hung on one of the room's walls, which read "GO GRYFFINDOR!" and depicted a majestic lion rearing on its hind legs.

I wonder what Gryffindor is?

Lily stood motionless for a moment, taking in all the unique details of the cozy room. She hadn't taken notice of many of the room's features when she'd entered the night before due to her overwhelming fatigue.

"Finally ready, I see."

Lily jolted from her red and yellow lethargy when a sultry, sallow voice sounded from the furthest corner of the room. She turned to see the dark-haired, pale wizard she'd encountered the night before: Professor Severus Snape.

Professor Snape's sarcastic drawl was anything but friendly, but not quite sinister. His black eyes were keenly focused on her—an intensity that sent a chill up Lily's spine—but they betrayed only a flicker of interest before they became blank and hollow. For a moment, Lily thought she'd be unable to speak, her throat having gone suddenly dry and her pulse quickening anxiously.

"I...I was unaware that someone—you—had been waiting for me," Lily returned, willing herself to regain her confidence and composure. She couldn't stop staring at him...he was unlike anyone she had ever met.

The mysterious wizard rose from his seat at one of the writing desks and tucked a shabby pocket-book into the folds of his black robes. Within a moment, he'd crossed the room and stopped a few feet before Lily, observing her appearance. Lily frowned as a blasé look crossed his emotionless face.

"You will be in the presence of two lords in a few moments, one of which is your uncle. I don't know what witches in Canada wear," Snape said dryly, his tone bordering insulting. "But some may consider your current attire...inappropriate."

Colour suddenly appeared on Lily's cheeks as her eyes widened in outraged astonishment. A string of curse-words had effortlessly slithered to the tip of her tongue. The back of her neck had grown hot, a product of anger and embarrassment. Lily could feel the tips of her fingers begin to tingle, the magic that always reared when she was upset itching to get out.

Don't do anything stupid...it's your first day.

Lily swallowed hard, matching the stare of the wizard before her, and forced out a fake, slightly incensed smile. "Were you sent here to take me to the Transfiguration classroom?"

Snape raised an eyebrow in subdued interest.

"Yes. It seems your uncle thinks you incapable of travelling down a flight of stairs on your own," Snape uttered silkily, making Lily silently grit her teeth. "Wouldn't want to leave you vulnerable to horrors of the castle, now would we?"

Lily scowled, despite trying to remain collected in the presence of the dark-haired man. Is he trying to goad me into a fight?

"If you were sent to escort me, I suggest you start walking," Lily proposed, a threatening glint reflecting in her blue eyes.

"...very well."

Snape turned toward a large portrait of an overweight woman dressed in a laced corset dress, commanding her to open. The female portrait, which seemed to be practicing her off-key opera voice, slid off the wall in annoyance when Snape addressed her, leaving a hole in the wall big enough for a person to fit through. Snape disappeared through the opening. Lily wordlessly followed him, still seething.

Lily made sure to stay a few metres behind the insufferable wizard as she followed in his wake, not eager to receive any more sarcastic insults. Though he had seemed unpleasant when she had met him yesterday, it appeared Professor Severus Snape had no inhibition being especially snarky without Dumbledore chaperoning her.

Snape's black cloak billowed behind him as he turned down a series of hallways and floated down a staircase, which—to Lily's vexation—moved on occasion.

"A moving staircase?" Lily demanded irritably, grabbing onto the stone railing as the staircase she and Snape occupied suddenly jerked to the left and magically attached to a different landing with a thud.

Snape stepped off the staircase without a backward glance to the perturbed girl.

Lily muttered a curse word under her breath and continued to follow the bat-like wizard, who—in Lily's opinion—was purposely trying to lose her, as he was gliding forward with unparalleled speed and sharply turning down different corridors.

"Excuse me!" Lily finally burst out, sweat beading on her forehead and a cramp stinging her torso. "Would you slow do—?"

The words caught in Lily's throat as she passed an open classroom and stopped dead in her tracks, her jaw falling open in a mixture of shock and horror. There, singing in booming, masculine voices, was an assortment of oddly dressed ghosts...some without heads.

Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hoggy Warty Hogwarts!
Teach us something, please!
Whether we be old and bald
Or young with scabby knees!
Our heads could do with filling
With some interesting stuff!
For now they're bare and full of air,
Dead flies and bits of fluff!
So teach us things worth knowing,
Bring back what we've forgot!
Just do your best, we'll do the rest,
And learn until our brains all rot!

"Ah, look here, gents!" the ghost who was conducting the choir announced, turning from his book of verses to look at the stunned girl frozen in the doorway. "We have a young lady listening in on our practice! How do you like the tune, my dear?"

The rest of the ghosts turned to look at Lily, who looked close to fainting.

"I-I-It was...w-w-wonderful!" Lily managed to stammer, unable to comprehend that she was having a conversation with a ghost—never mind listening in on a supernatural choir practice. "A-A-Are you practicing for a big event?"

"Yes, actually! There is an annual gala at Hogwarts every summer," the ghost announced brightly, floating closer to Lily, who's breathing quickened. "What's your name, my dear? I don't believe I've seen you around the castle...?"

Lily noticed the ghost was dressed in what only could be described as a medieval costume, his attire consisting of a patterned tunic and tights. Around the ghost's neck was a ruff, and atop his curly white hair was a plumed hat.

"I-I've just arrived," Lily tried, willing a polite smile on her face to mask her panic. "My name is Li—Aurora."

That's the second time today I've almost slipped up...

"Well it's a pleasure to meet you, Aurora," the ghost smiled beneath his wispy mustache. "I'm Sir Nicholas de Mimsy Porpington, resident ghost of the House of Gryffindor. Will you be staying at Hogwarts for a while, my dear?"

Before Lily could respond, a cold hand grasped her arm and diverted her attention back toward the entrance. She gasped, thinking one of the ghosts had come up behind her, but instead came face-to-face with an angry Severus Snape.

"There you are," Snape hissed, his voice simmering as Lily's surprised eyes met his dark ones. "Your little detour has made us late."

"Ah, Professor Snape!" Sir Nicholas jovially greeted him. Snape ignored him.

"Well maybe," Lily started furiously, momentarily forgetting she was in a room full of ghosts as she tore her arm out of Snape's grasp. "If you hadn't purposely sped ahead to try and fluster me, I wouldn't have had to stop to ask for directions."

"You're absurd," Snape scoffed, his eyes narrowing as he regarded Lily in what she perceived to be a growing dislike.

"The only thing absurd here, Professor Snape," Lily began, venom piercing her tone as she spoke—perhaps even mocked—his name for the first time. "Are your manners."

"Hear, hear!" a ghost from the choir chimed in.

Snape's jaw clenched as he side-glanced the ghost. He stared at Lily for a moment, an indescribable emotion conflicting in his dark orbs. As Lily defiantly returned his gaze, she wasn't sure if she was afraid of Severus Snape or simply intrigued by him. Either way, her stubbornness wasn't allowing her to sensibly submit and ignore the wizard's taunts.

"Follow me," Snape demanded before he auspiciously swept past Lily and out of the room.

Lily's face relaxed a little as she turned back to the apparition she'd been conversing with; suddenly, Sir Nicholas and his band of singing ghosts didn't seem as frightening as before. "I suppose that's my cue to leave. It was lovely to meet you, Sir Nicholas...I'm sure I'll be seeing you all around," Lily smiled, the ghosts in the room peering at her curiously as she slipped out of the room and into the corridor.

Snape wordlessly proceeded down the corridor once Lily exited the classroom, his fists clamped at his sides. Though she could only see the back of his head, Lily could tell the wizard was irritated, his walk less fluid and self-assured than before. She imagined Snape was battling to hold back from hurling more insults her way.

It wasn't long before Snape stopped outside an obscure wooden door on the first floor of the castle. There were no special markings or signs that conveyed it was a Transfiguration classroom; Lily was sure she would never have found it by herself.

"Lord Dumbledore and Lord Ollivander are waiting for you in there," Snape announced, turning to give Lily one more bored glower before he took off in the opposite direction.

Lily watched him rudely walk off, fascinated. And to think he'll be my tutor...

"Aurora, there you are, my dear."

The door swung open, revealing the merry face of Lord Dumbledore. He was dressed in a suave set of magenta robes trimmed with silk, his long white beard tied neatly with red string. His cerulean eyes sparkled behind his half-moon spectacles; Lily couldn't help but feel warmer in his presence.

"Sorry I'm late. I got distracted by a ghost choir on the second floor," Lily explained as Dumbledore ushered her into the classroom. "They were practicing for the—wow."

Lily stopped mid-sentence, her eyes growing wide as she noticed the classroom was literally stuffed with thousands of thin, elongated boxes. The boxes were expertly stacked all the way up to the high ceiling and filled every cranny of the musty room. Lily was so intrigued by the little packages she didn't notice another man in the room.

"Aurora, I would like you to meet Lord Ollivander," Dumbledore said, directing her attention to an aged wizard with feathery white hair and hoary eyes. "Lord Ollivander is a renowned wand maker. His family has been in the wand making business since 382 B.C."

Lord Ollivander stepped forward importantly, his silver eyes glinting in intrigue as he gently took Lily's hand and kissed the top of it; Lily smiled uneasily, finding the wizard's eyes to be slightly creepy.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Lady Rockford," Lord Ollivander spoke in a wizened voice, folding his knobby hands behind his back and fixing his strange gaze on her. "It's not often I come upon a witch or wizard over the age of eleven without a wand. I do love a challenge."

Lily bit her bottom lip; the stress of trying to act both like a noblewoman and a knowledgeable member of magical society was difficult. "I confess, Lord Ollivander, I don't know much about wands. I have never had one in my possession, and my mother rarely—if ever—used her own."

Hopefully that matches up with whatever story Dumbledore has told Ollivander...

"Do not fret, my dear," Lord Ollivander began in a comforting voice, turning away from Lily and plucking a box out of one of the overwhelming stacks in the room. "I guarantee there is a wand here that will suit you perfectly. Shall we begin?"

Lily gulped as Ollivander opened the first box and extracted an elegantly crafted 9 ½ inch wand. He offered the wand to Lily and she carefully took it in her right hand, looking uncertain. Dumbledore watched on with quiet interest.

"A nine-and-a-half inch vinewood wand with a dragon heartstring core. Reasonably springy."

Dragon heartstring? Lily's eyes widened as she examined the wand inquisitively. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to do with it.

"Well, give it a wave!" Ollivander instructed somewhat impatiently, his silver eyes shining excitably.

Lily awkwardly brandished the wand, which resulted in one of the tables in the room to begin to shudder violently. She gasped when the table began to splinter and fold in on itself.

"Oh, no no no! That won't do," Ollivander plucked the wand from Lily's hand, causing the table to stop morphing and rupturing; Dumbledore chuckled in the background. "We'll need something with a bit more stability...something that will compliment that untamed magic you have pent up."

Ollivander disappeared behind a stack of wands and returned with two more boxes, Lily nervously wondering what disaster she would cause next. "Let's try this one next. Ten-and-a-half inches, maple, with a phoenix feather core; a little thicker and rigid than the last."

Lily took the wand, an uncomfortable coolness settling in her right hand. Without thinking, Lily closed her eyes and flailed her wand. She—along with Ollivander—yelped when the chain of the metal chandelier above their heads snapped and sent it crashing to the floor before them. Luckily, neither of them had been beneath it. Dumbledore chortled again, beaming.

"I'm so sorry!" Lily sputtered in embarrassment, immediately depositing the wand back into its box and sheepishly turning to Ollivander. "Maybe I'm just not meant to have a wand..."

"Every wizard and witch is meant to have a wand," Ollivander insisted, his eyes afire with a passionate vigour. "I am the best wand maker in the British Isles—dare I be so arrogant to say Europe—and I have never encountered anyone who I could not match a wand to."

Nearly twenty wands later, Lily was convinced that she would be the exception; no wand suited her, and the more she tried them out, the more the room resembled a destruction zone. Dumbledore had remained silent throughout the session, while Lord Ollivander had become more and more frenzied, cursing as he disappeared into the stacks again. It was apparent he would not accept failure.

Ten minutes later he emerged, carrying a single wand box. The box was slightly tattered and dusty, looking to be more weather-beaten than some of the others he had presented. With a small, enigmatic smile, Ollivander removed the wand from the box and presented it to Lily. Lily sighed and took the wand, ready for another disappointment, but perked up when a warm feeling spread throughout her arm.

The design of the wand was quite stunning, having almost an antique charm. The slender wand had an intricate carving on it that made it unique: a vine twisted and snaked from the handle to the tip, tiny leaves and flowers springing from it. The flowers were inlaid with what appeared to be pink pearls.

"I designed this wand almost fifty years ago, when I was still an apprentice to my father. I spent a good deal of time on the aesthetic, as you can see. My father was the one who crafted the core from the hair of a female unicorn. My mother collected the hair from a particularly genteel unicorn while she was travelling in the forests of Andorra," Ollivander explained, his rumpled face poised in subdued anticipation. He seemed rather fond of the wand and its story.

"It's very beautiful," Lily whispered; she looked to be almost in a trance as she absentmindedly twirled the wand around in her fingers.

Made of a unicorn's hair...unicorns are real too?

"Willow, ten-and-a-quarter inches, swishy; a wand most advantageous for Charm work," Ollivander reiterated dreamily, his tone growing lower and his eyes burning with intensity. "Give it a try, Lady Rockford. Think about how it feels."

The warm feeling had already coursed through the rest of her body and the tips of her fingers tingled fervently. Lily swallowed her apprehensiveness and flourished the elegant wand by flicking it forward. It was as if the wand had infused her with confidence.

Magically, a small flock of doves suddenly sprung from the tip of the wand and fluttered out one of the open windows in the Transfiguration classroom. Lily gasped in a mixture of disbelief and delight.

"Bravo!" Dumbledore encouraged, clapping as Lily turned to him in enthused shock.

" I can't believe I just did that!" Lily squeaked, looking at Ollivander with disbelief written across her face; she couldn't help but feel a bit proud. "This wand feels wonderful."

"How extraordinary..." Ollivander said mysteriously, ignoring Lily as his gaze set on the window the doves flew out of. He eventually turned toward Lily, looking absolutely captivated. "That was an exceptional exhibition of magical adherence. I do not see such powerful displays often."

It was evident that Lord Ollivander was extremely devoted to his craft. He paused for a moment, his zealous eyes fixated on the carved wand in Lily's hand. He seemed absolutely besotted by it.

Lily looked down at the handsome wand in her hand and smiled. She felt an inexplicable connection to it—as if she were always meant to have it and its magic had lay dormant, awaiting her arrival before it revealed its potential. Having it in her custody now was strangely comforting.

"You will find this wand to be extremely loyal. A few have tried it out, and it has never taken to anyone—rather, it has stubbornly backfired when anyone has attempted to use it, including myself. I often wondered if it was defective," Ollivander smiled, exchanging a look with Dumbledore. "Turns out it just took someone special to tap into its magic. I think we can expect great things from you, Lady Rockford."

Lily blushed; when she looked at Dumbledore, he winked.

"Thank you for taking the trouble to help me find a wand, Lord Ollivander. I'm very pleased with it," Lily said happily, forgetting to keep up her cool, regal façade; she couldn't help but smile when she looked down at her wand again.

It's like I'm a real witch now...

"It was an absolute pleasure," Lord Ollivander said suavely, kissing the top of Lily's hand again. Lily decided she liked Ollivander, despite his uncanny eyes.

"Aurora, will you wait for me outside the classroom?" Dumbledore requested.

Lily exited the room and waited outside the door, twiddling her wand in her hand happily. Though she had left, she could still hear snippets of Dumbledore's conversation with Ollivander. As she listened she frowned, the mood in the room having changed with her absence. Ollivander's excitement had dissipated.

"I really do appreciate you paying a visit to Hogwarts to arrange a wand for Aurora," Dumbledore said kindly. "Bringing your entire inventory with you must have been a bothersome task. I want to compensate you for the trouble. I'll add a few galleons to the price of the wand."

"I'll be bringing my inventory with me wherever I go now, Dumbledore; it's no trouble," Ollivander said, turning away from him and beginning to shrink the wand boxes in the room. "There was quite a bit of damage done to the shop yesterday. Diagon Alley has been shut down for the time being. Many of the shop owners have cleared out stock and moved elsewhere, fearing another attack. Eeylops' Emporium is in ruins. I feel terribly for him; more than half of the owls were killed. I consider myself lucky that my building only suffered minimal damage."

Attack? What attack?

"Yes, I heard of the damage. It is all extremely unfortunate. It's a miracle none of the shoppers and shopkeepers were injured. Perhaps you can rent space up in Hogsmeade for the time being?"

"It's a possibility. I've heard the Magical Menagerie has already set up shop there. Fortescue is also thinking of moving up here; don't think he can afford closing up shop for Merlin knows how long," Ollivander's tone turned ugly. "It boils my blood that we have to put up with this muggle war. There has already been such devastation to London; I don't know if the city can survive another air raid."

Oh my god...there have been bombings in London.

"Churchill is trying to recruit more men into the Royal Air Force...they suffered heavy casualties yesterday. If I were Churchill, I'd be pleading with the Minister for skilled fliers. I imagine many of our Quidditch players would have an aptitude for dogfights."

Lily closed her eyes and stopped listening to Ollivander's rant. A sinking feeling settled in her stomach, making her feel ill. Images of what state London could be in suddenly swirled in her head.

I could have been there.

Then, like a knife, another image stabbed her, making her blink back tears. Lily quickly walked down the hallway, wand still clutched in her hand, and ducked into another room, closing the door behind her. It turned out to be the girls' toilets.

She collapsed against one of the tiled walls, sliding into a sitting position with her knees curled up against her chest. Tears began to meander down her cheek, and she suddenly felt like she couldn't breathe.

Today Lily had encountered Severus Snape, ghosts, and the possibility that she would be the only wandless witch in the history of...well, magic...yet this had been the most terrified she'd been all day.

The brown-haired girl put a hand over her heart, though it didn't stop it from beating furiously. Lily knew she had to pull herself together if she wanted to avoid painful questions from Dumbledore, which would only makes things worse, and that she couldn't blow her cover in front of Ollivander—but, at that moment, she couldn't hold it together.

Please James...don't be dead.

Author's Notes

Please continue to read and review :)

-pratty_prongs_princesse