Lovino's grandfather had the world's oldest vacuum. Antonio knew this because Lovino would not stop complaining about it all day.

Lovi: I mean, look at this thing

Lovi: [Image Attached]

Lovi: It's fucking ancient! And if it breaks on my watch, which it will, just you see, Nonno's going to be pissed and then I'm going to be pissed and it'll be this big fucking mess.

Lovi: And I really didn't need freaking Nonno up my ass today. It's supposed to be my day off from the store and now I've got chores? Wth?!

Antonio: u'll do fine. dont think so much loooviii

Lovi: Ew did you just type "u'll"

Antonio chuckled and stared at the bright screen. He tapped his foot to the music around him and looked up, eyebrows furrowing like Lovino's so often did once he got a look at his room.

It was dark in there. When had that happened? Only a few seconds ago it had been, like, three? Now his room was only illuminated by the light of his cell phone screen and the dull green of the CD player over on his desk.

His grounding ended tomorrow and, finally, he would be able to see Francis again and leave! Antonio wasn't the type wired for staying in one place for so long, especially on the sunny California days that had been mocking him outside his window all week. And especially especially when Gilbert was due back any day now.

When the doorbell rang, immediately Antonio knew who it must have been.

"Speak of the devil," he grinned and ran out his bedroom door, flinching briefly at the bright hall lights before rushing to the railing at the top of the staircase and looking down. His father was already at the door and he could hear muffled voices talking to him.

"Sir, Gilbert just got here and Antonio only has a few more days. We thought, perhaps, if just for the night, we could borrow him? I realize it isn't our place, but-"

"His grounding ends tomorrow! Could you just cut him slack? Just a little, man," another, much louder voice butted in.

"Gilbert! Are you trying to get Antonio into even more trouble?" the first hissed and Antonio shook his head at his friends, smiling despite himself. That was when his father looked up and spotted him. Antonio stopped dead in his tracks, caught.

"Antonio?" his father spoke, prompting him to… what? Speak?

Antonio waved, shoulders scrunched and smile sheepish. His father sighed and then, to his relief, smiled.

"Go on," he relented and Antonio bolted down the stairs and out the door in two seconds flat.

"Gracias, Papa! I'll be home by ten!"

"Yeah, yeah," he said, as if done with it, but his amused smirk gave him away. Antonio smiled and turned to his friends.

All three of them were there now, standing in the streets of suburban California and looking as excited and mischievous as they had when they were kids. Because they hadn't been together in the suburban summer streets of California together since they were kids.

Antonio wasn't sure about the other two, but in that moment, he felt like he could own the world.

-/-

Everytime Antonio listened to the CD, he got a sense of nostalgia that he had no place in feeling. He sure wasn't supposed to be listening to it and he sure wasn't supposed to feel so happy about all the familiar music he heard, but he couldn't help it.

He recognized the CD now that he was listening to it in full. When he was younger, his mom used to play it in her car all over the place. Antonio knew the songs like the back of his hand, but the lyrics only by the made up words he'd associated with them when he was little. Since he really wasn't going to try to sing along with those, when he lay in his bed, listening to the old songs, he hummed them out. It was oddly comforting, like an old lullaby.

The songs filled his heart with contentment and happy memories. He thought of looking up at the window of the car and the bright sun streaking through the dull tint. He thought of his mother at the wheel and the radio making the car dance. He would have crayons or some action figure or maybe just his soccer ball in his lap and he'd kick his legs around from the elevated platform of the car seat he sat in.

At the same time, though, it was really… bittersweet? It was as if raw melancholy echoed around his head and reminded his heart of simpler times, innocent days, a happy family. Those were the days where his mother and father had been in love. When his mother didn't have to work every day at a grocery store where people got frustrated and yelled at her, and she had to work long hours. When Antonio saw his father every evening before he went to bed and every morning before school and not just on school breaks.

But it had also been a time where his parents had fought a lot. It had been a time where they had been deciding what to do about their lives. How to split from someone they still loved. How to continue raising their child when they couldn't even handle themselves or each other. Antonio remembered a lot of the happier times, but the difficult times had still been there too.

A week later, it was time to board a plane back to New York.

He was caught between leaving the CD behind and…

"Antonio."

Antonio quickly hid the CD case and turned. "Hey," he greeted.

"Are you ready?"

"Yeah, yeah. Let me just- I'll be right down."

"Alright. Don't be too long. You've got a plane to catch," his father replied and shut his door. Antonio sighed in relief and took the CD back out.

These CDs meant the world to his father. He couldn't take any of them. Especially not this one.

He couldn't take it. He sighed again and put the CD down.

"Antonio?" his name was called up the stairs. Antonio sprang into action and hoisted his suitcase with him down the stairs and out the door.

There was no turning back now.

At the airport, his father had that look in his eye. He was smiley and bright, but it was subdued. "Take care, Antonio."

"I will, Papa," Antonio replied and his dad took him into his arms, practically squeezing the life out of him. Antonio wrapped his own arms around his father and hugged too. It wouldn't be until Christmas break until he saw him again. "I'll miss you," he said - possibly the truest words he'd ever said in parting his father.

"Me too, Toni," his father laughed, making Antonio smile. His dad pulled away and held him at shoulder length. "I'll see you at Christmas, okay? And don't forget met to call." He was trying so hard to be upbeat about this.

"Yeah," Antonio said, a pleased smile lighting his face. Then, with some difficulty, he stepped away. "See you."

He turned and made his way across the gate, glancing behind him one more time before he was gone. Surrounded by loved ones meeting and busy bodies hustling around, standing still and watching Antonio leave with that melancholic expression on his face, his dad looked like the loneliest person in the world.

"Hey, Antonio!" his father called one last time, raising a hand to wave. "And good luck with Lovino!"

Antonio's eyes went comically wide at this and his dad cracked up beyond the barrier of the gate. Antonio tried to scowl at his dad like he'd learned from Lovino, but he was afraid his face was much too red for that, so he waved and ducked around the corner, leaving California for the maze of corridors of the airport.

He could have sworn he was still flushed when he'd boarded the plane and found his seat. After stowing his bag, Antonio sat very very still, thinking over his father's words. Then, he burst into laughter.

He got quite a few weird looks for it, but Antonio had never cared about that sort of thing. He pulled out his phone before the plane took off and texted his dad.

Antonio: thanks for giving me a heart attack back there

Papa: No problem. Just doing my duty as your father

Papa: But really Antonio. Good luck

Antonio: thanks papa

Antonio put his phone away then and instead took out tech much older than his simple smartphone. He plugged in the headphones and pushed the 'Play' button.

"Doodoodoo, doodoodoodoo…"

-/-

It didn't take Antonio long to settle back down back in New York. It was his home, after all. His true home. He loved California, but there was nowhere quite like New York.

One of the first things he did when he got back after his mother had picked him up at the airport, giving him enough suffocating hugs and kisses for two years of his life, Antonio had thrown his suitcase into his room and taken off out the door.

"Going to see Lovino?" His mother had asked, stopping him on the porch and he had nodded, grinning like a mad man. It had only been a month since they'd met at their tree, toward the end of the school year and before California and Oregon, but that felt like forever to Antonio.

When he got there, Lovino was already there. His plane had arrived back yesterday, a great coincidence in Antonio's opinion. When Lovino looked up as Antonio approached, he looked surprised to see him.

"You're back," he said and Antonio grinned, plopping down next to him.

"So I am."

And, like a spell shattering some awkward curse around them, Lovino laughed and everything was right.

Antonio leaned against his friend and chuckled along.

Everything was right.

-/-

From what Antonio had gathered from his friend, Lovino and Gilbert were not a thing.

Which was a relief to Antonio and, in turn, made him feel guilty.

Apparently, their date had gone well back in Oregon, something both Lovino and Gilbert had told him rather shyly. It had included a lot of awkward eye contact and laughing at each other, but it sounded cute and Antonio was happy that his friends had had a good time.

Antonio noticed in the time he and Lovino hung out by their tree that summer that Lovino texted Gilbert a lot. And he would snort and laugh when he read whatever it was there on the screen. And he would type away for so long that Antonio couldn't help wondering what in the world the two were talking about.

And then Francis and Gilbert came to New York and all Antonio could focus on were the times Gilbert and Lovino sat next to each other or when Gilbert leaned over and whispered something in Lovino's ear that made him laugh or when they punched each other in the shoulders because one of them had said something stupid.

Antonio's chest ached and a jealous fire flickered in his chest. Most people knew him as the level-headed, perhaps a little daft, but cool person he put up with his smile at school. But fire and passion roared within him as well and that fueled his jealousy no matter how hard he tried to suppress it. His friends were happy. Why would he ruin that?

He wouldn't. But that didn't stop his feelings from swirling like a maelstrom in his chest.

Antonio was almost relieved to spend so much time with Emma that summer. Almost. It was difficult the first time he saw her again after what he'd realized in Oregon.

"Toni! You're back!" She had exclaimed when they'd met up in a diner downtown. When she'd practically tackled him in a hug, he'd been paralyzed until she'd pulled back, a slight frown gracing her pretty features. "What's wrong?"

Antonio's mouth had opened of its own accord, but no words were able to come out. It wasn't until Emma stepped back with worried eyes that he snapped out of it with a smile of his own.

It was natural to put a smile on his face, he realized, even when the smile wasn't natural itself.

"Nothing's wrong. Sorry, I was just surprised," he chuckled but Emma still looked skeptical.

"Surprised? I always hug you when I see you."

"Yeah. Sorry, guess I just forgot with how long I haven't seen you. I missed you though," he liked and felt a little guilty until a genuine smile appeared on Emma's face. Maybe if a little lie like that made her so happy it was okay?

But shouldn't he have missed his girlfriend?

In the weeks following, Antonio had his fair share of socialization and activity. There was practically no downtime and definitely no time for boredom between dates with Emma and hanging out with Francis, Gilbert, and Lovino. A lot of time had to be taken from his and Lovino's tree in the park, but, as far as he could tell, neither he nor Lovino minded too much with so much else going on.

As far as he could tell until one day, Antonio magically had some downtime for himself.

It was second nature to walk to the park at times like this and, to Antonio's surprise, Lovino was there too.

"Hey," he greeted, waving as he walked up. Lovino looked up, as surprised as Antonio had felt. It looked like he was reading a book.

In answer, Lovino merely raised an eyebrow and went back to his book. They were close enough that that didn't bother Antonio. Lovino wasn't always one of many words, especially if he was focused on something. But there was an odd crease to his brow that, despite what a lot of people from school thought, wasn't always there.

Antonio knew that something must have been bothering Lovino.

"Alright," Antonio said, sitting down next to his friend and leaning against the tree. "What's up?"

Lovino peered out from behind his book, less than amused. Antonio knew it was a front.

"Nothing."

"I think you are lying," Antonio sang teasingly. Lovino frowned and looked back down at his book. Antonio's tone grew more serious now. "Lovino, come on."

"Got in a fight with my dad. No big deal," Lovino grumbled, not taking his eyes away from the volume. Antonio frowned.

Not a big deal? This coming from the guy who did anything in his power to impress his father? This from Lovino who may argue with his dad and try to pass it off as some sort of macho thing, but, in reality, the argument would stress him out until he buried himself in some textbook for the rest of the day? An argument from a father who only ever cared about Lovino's grades and Feliciano's therapy appointments?

"Tell me about it," Antonio prompted and watched as Lovino's knuckles tightened on the book's cover.

"He told me I shouldn't be goofing around so much. I told him it's the summertime and I don't have to be studying all the time. We got into an argument about getting into college and crappy SAT scores, a test I haven't even taken yet. Then he told me to get out of the house until I got my act together. So here I am," Lovino confessed, shrugging as if it really was no big deal and severely contradicting his own words. For a second, Antonio was frozen, seriously unsure as to what to say, then, like the bigmouth he is, he blurted the first thing that came to mind.

"He kicked you out of the house?!"

At this, Lovino finally looked up, lips pursed and shoulders folding in on each other. Then, he shrugged again. "Yeah?"

Antonio gaped for a second, mouth opening and closing, waiting for words to appear. Instead, he just stared at his friend.

"He kicked you out of the house," he repeated and Lovino huffed.

"Yes, idiot. As I've said," he said and shut his book, putting it down on the grass. He pivoted into a better position and laid back onto the grass, covering his eyes with an arm as if he was just going to take a nap after all of this.

"He can't do that!" Antonio exclaimed and Lovino peeked out from behind his arm.

"His house," he said, nonchalantly.

"But, but…" Antonio tried to protest.

"Listen," Lovino spoke up again, extracting his arm from his face to look up at his friend. "It really isn't that big of a deal. He'll cool off or I'll go pretend to study in my room. Things blow over."

At this, Antonio paused. His eyebrows furrowed further than they probably ever had, inspecting his friend like the answers he was looking for would be printed on his skin instead of in his head.

"Has this…" he asked, unsure if he really wanted to hear the words aloud, "Happened before?"

Lovino shrugged. That wasn't an answer Antonio would accept.

"Lovi-" he started before he was interrupted by an impatient Lovino.

"Sometimes, okay? It's not that big of a deal. I just come hang here for a bit."

For something Lovino kept insisting wasn't a big deal, Antonio couldn't help but see it as one in his head.

"Lovino, why didn't you tell me this sooner?" Antonio asked and Lovino sighed long and suffering. He dropped his arm back over his eyes.

"Because I knew you would make it a big deal like this! Besides, it's only happened recently, so I know he's going to get tired of it soon. It's not something that needs fixing."

"But, Lovino, this isn't right. You're his son. He shouldn't just throw you aside like that! You aren't some perfect person who can devote their whole life to making him happy!" Antonio argued and, like a flash, Lovino had sat up to look at him, fire in his eyes.

"You're right. It isn't fair. But, you know what? There isn't anything we can do about it, so why don't we shut up now and I'll take a nap and this will all blow over in a couple hours?"

At this, Antonio was stunned. Lovino could do angry. He could do so much anger and frustration and he could scream and yell and punch the wall. But never, and Antonio swears never, has Lovino been able to call out his own father for his shit. Never has he said anything about how unjust, how shitty his father treats him, even when Antonio argues until Lovino can no longer deny it. He's never said a single word against him.

It turned out there was a breaking point to Lovino's tolerance of his shitty father.

And there was hopelessness in Lovino's blood as well. There was a part of him that knew he couldn't solve everything with sarcasm and snide comments. There was a part of him that could give up.

And Antonio didn't know what to do about this new part of Lovino he'd never seen before. So he did something he never did. He shut up.

A few hours passed and Antonio simply sat there, watching passerby and soaking up the summer heat. When Lovino sat up as the sun was setting, Antonio guessed that he really hadn't slept at all.

"I better get back," he said and Antonio nodded, standing up with him. They walked back together, silent as they come and don't stop until they reached their houses.

They both stood there, watching one dark house and one lit one. Antonio guessed that Francis and Gilbert were home from the movie Antonio had decided not to see with them.

"Feli must not be home," Lovino said, regarding his own house.

"You're welcome to mine," Antonio said, gesturing at his own house but Lovino shook his head.

"No. I'm going to just head in," Lovino said, and made to move away, but Antonio caught his arm. Lovino looked back, first at Antonio's hand, then up to his face.

"No, I mean, you're welcome whenever," Antonio said. "If you ever need somewhere to go. Our door is always open. And my window too," Antonio said the last part teasingly, but made sure his eyes burned their sincerity into Lovino's.

Lovino averted his gaze and nodded. "Yeah. Um, thanks, Antonio."

"No problem," he said, then spread his arms. "Now, give me a hug, little tomato!"

As Antonio threw his arms around Lovino, the other boy sputtered, trying to pull away in his indignance.

"Ugh! Antonio, I thought you stopped calling me that when we were kids!"

Antonio gasped. "Never! You will always be the little tomato, no matter how old we are, Lovi!"

"Gross! No, take that back! I refuse to hear that nickname any longer!" Lovino argued, punching his chest lightly. Antonio laughed.

"Tomato! Tomato! Tomato!" Antonio teased and, like it had when they were kids, Lovino's face grew ten shades too red. Eventually, though, he got his friend to laugh and rest his forehead against his chest.

The street grew darker around them, but the two boys simply kept on laughing.

-/-

Towards the end of summer, Antonio was invited to a bonfire down by the lake by a couple of students at his school. Matthias had said it was cool if he brought his friends along, so on a late July night, Antonio found himself in his mom's van, driving himself along with Francis, Gilbert, and a very reluctant Lovino to this party.

Antonio had been pretty excited for this party at the beginning, thinking that he could joke around with his friends, introduce them to his other friends from school. Then, maybe he could go hang out with Lovino in whatever secluded corner he'd found himself in so he could spend some time with the best friend he hadn't seen in ages.

Things never went quite as Antonio expected them to though. Because, as soon as they had stepped foot on that beach where about twenty other people from his school were crowded, whooping loudly or laughing to some joke that probably wasn't even funny due to alcohol consumption, that's when Antonio ran into Emma.

"Toni! Good, I found you. Matthias said he'd invited you so I've been looking everywhere." At this, Emma linked their arms, steering him in the opposite direction and away from his friends. "Come on. Let's go sit at the fire. I was there earlier and it's so nice. All we need is an acoustic guitar and it'll be like from the movies. Well, that and a lot less partying. And maybe not the pot my brother brought. I swear, I can't escape it." Emma rolled her eyes but didn't seem to mind it all that much.

So Antonio was led to a spot by the bonfire. He half expected to sit on a log like you really did see in the movies, but found them both sitting rather on the sand, backs to the lake the bonfire had advantageously been situated by. Antonio supposed bonfires were usually either by lakes or in the middle of nowhere to avoid wildfires.

When he looked around, he found his friends already mingling, mixing into the group with ease. Antonio was put at ease by that, but his heart still worried about wherever Lovino had found himself. It wasn't like he had wanted to come in the first place.

But soon Antonio had been dragged into conversation. With Emma. With those around them. And with Francis and Gilbert when they swung around. Still, Lovino was nowhere to be seen.

With all the commotion around him, though, this thought was forced to the back of his mind and, with Emma half hugging him and all the people around to talk to, Antonio lost track of time.

By the time he remembered after a particularly long lull in conversation he was actively participating in, Antonio knew at least an hour had gone by. He worried that Lovino might have just walked home himself from boredom, so, finally, Antonio claimed he was thirsty and detached himself from Emma to escape.

As he circled around the fire looking for his friend, Antonio actually found the cooler first and figured he could grab something while he was there.

The ice chest was a considerable distance from the fire, so as to keep the ice inside from melting. When he approached though, he heard something he wasn't expecting. Laughter. A beautiful sound he knew well.

He looked up then, scanning his surroundings. When his eyes finally fell on a shadow leaning against one of the trees a good distance from the bonfire, his heart sunk. There were two shadows there. One obviously Lovino, a mirthful smirk on his lips and the faintest traces of a blush on his cheeks in the firelight.

The other was Gilbert. He was equally bashful and in high spirits. It was just like every time they spent together that Antonio had seen, but this seemed more intimate. They were close and alone together. And it was obvious they liked each other.

Antonio stayed there for longer than he should have. He was hidden in the shadows where the cooler sat so nobody asked him what he was doing. He watched as they laughed together and his heart weighed heavily on him. When he came to his senses he shook his head, turning back to the cooler. He found a water and was preparing to go back to the bonfire when a voice caught his attention. It was low and shy, but it rang perfectly clear in Antonio's ears.

"Can I… um, can I kiss you?" Gilbert asked. This was met with the longest silence known to man, all the while Antonio found himself holding his breath to hear.

Then, "Okay."

Antonio looked before he knew what he was doing. He saw Gilbert's hand come up to hold Lovino's cheek delicately and the two were impossibly close. Then, before anything else could happen, Antonio turned away. He didn't want to be here for this. He didn't want to see it. It was rude to watch, but, more than that, Antonio didn't think he could handle it.

So he made his way back to the bonfire and was silent, all but the briefest of comments, for the rest of the night.

When he and Francis and Gilbert and Lovino met up again to drive home, Gilbert and Lovino were oddly silent too. It was a happier silence than what Antonio suffered though.

The whole ride home, Antonio had to stop himself from looking in his rearview mirror where Gilbert and Lovino sat in the back, blushing and keeping their gazes out their respective windows. Francis, of course, was as intuitive as always, so Antonio's avoided his gaze too.

Antonio was glad to get home and curl up to sleep, his heart heavy. It hurt. More than any crush had before. But Antonio didn't let himself think about it.

CV: I'll admit, I didn't put a lot of time into editing this. But eh. (i must sound so lazy in these a/n's lol) So, I wanted to say thank you to everyone who's commented and to that guest who recently did so. You help me keep going on this fic, so thank you all so much! It helps more than you know.

Side note: i didn't realize it at the time, but i actually marathoned Harry Potter on my birthday and recently i was like "wait a minute. that's what Lovi does in this fic ahhh"