Disclaimer: First Chapter
Story Start!

Naruto was annoyed and stressed.

Here he was, at school, reading on the different ruling styles of ancient royalty and what led to their downfalls, and he had not one, not two, but three girls trying to feed him during lunch. He wasn't usually the most avid of readers, but when it involved reading on wars and kingdoms, or gardening, then you had his interest.

Asia was trying to feed him shrimp.

Ravel was competing with her, and going for grilled fish.

Koneko, for some ungodly reason, had joined the competition and was trying to feed him sushi. He didn't understand why people thought because he was an Uzumaki, that he had a love for seafood. That was a stereotype that he disliked, though he never said no to any food even those of the types he hated, he actually didn't like seafood all that much.

"I'm surprised you aren't feeding him Cunt-ucky Fried Chicken."

"Well, I'm just shocked that..." Ravel paused, since she didn't have a good comeback for that prime insult. She just stared at Koneko with a look of surprise, before she turned a little red. "Well, why are you even here? Asia is my competition, not you." Ravel stated.

Asia nodded.

"Yeah, I'm the... wait, what?" Asia didn't know what to say to that. Ravel, with her body and beauty, considered her to be actual competition? She blinked when she looked at Naruto, and on his face she could see his annoyance reaching critical levels.

"Slut cat!"

"Woah now, don't make me bring my fists into play." Koneko wiped off her fists, and she stood up, ready to get into some violence with a Phenex. Ravel was just coming into her school, and trying to mark Naruto as her territory. That would not do in the slightest for her plans, not when her competition she already had was somebody on Asia's level. "Hey Asia, who are Naruto's 5 favorite rulers in order?" Koneko asked Asia.

"King Arthur of Britain, Alexandar the Great, Attila the Hun, Queen Medb, and finally Wu Zetian." Asia answered with a tilted head.

Koneko pointed to Asia.

"Whatever we have going between us doesn't really matter, because that is our competition. I say we offer a temporary truce, in order to... see, you and I wouldn't have known he respects any female rulers. We would have just named popular male rulers. The only one I knew was King Arthur." Koneko stated as she pointed between Naruto and Asia, as if the two of them weren't there and couldn't hear what they were saying.

Ravel looked at Koneko, and then at Asia.

"... The slutty Queen Medb?"

"She was very honest with what she desired, unlike my opinion of most backstabbing women with hidden agendas, if she didn't like you she told you and then had you killed. She was slutty, sure, but she was a fine Queen beloved by her people." Naruto stated with a shrug. He didn't hate female leaders, he was just annoyed when things like Oda being a woman messed with him in his childhood wanting to become like her. "Also, the way she died is really funny." Naruto stated with a grin.

He really liked the way that Queen Medb died, it actually got a great laugh out of him.

Naruto snickered.

She was killed by a sling loaded with cheese, that was a funny way for a brave warrior queen to die. It was no King Arthur getting stabbed by Mordred, but it was a hell of a way to end a legend. That just goes to show that mankind is really the most creative species when it comes to finding unique ways to kill people.

"See, neither of us know that kind of information about him. If we are to compete against Asia, a truce and team up is required, otherwise we stand no chance." Koneko stated to Ravel the facts.

"I'm still here."

"Be quiet competition, we're making an alliance against you for Naruto's heart." Ravel waved her hand to send Asia away, who just had her jaw drop from the blatant way that was phrased. Ravel was already stating that she planned on teaming up with Koneko, when they had super clashing personalities, just to beat her.

"Are we win, then we can start hating each other with a passion in whatever cliche and overused cat and bird way we want to." Koneko extended her hand to Ravel.

Asia looked at Naruto.

"Are you even paying attention to this, they want to team up against me for your heart." Asia complained to Naruto. She was already at a disadvantage against either girls, since they both has real fighting power to stand by Naruto's side with. Now they were going to team up against her and steal any chance that she had of winning.

Naruto glanced up from his book at them all.

He deadpan stared them down.

"You do realize that I only plan to have a single wife when I become King, any other girls will be concubines. If you want to become my woman, I don't really care, but it's kind of stupid for you to compete with each other to become mine without considering my feelings in the matter." Naruto explained to them the basic facts. He wasn't for or against harems, but he was a strict follower of the fact that you should only marry a single person so that there would only be a single "Queen" for a Kingdom.

"So-"

"Pfffft, Projectile Cheese... next enemy that appears, I'm killing with cheese this time. Now that I'm remembering Medb, I'm totally going to kill the next enemy with some good old cheese." Naruto grinned as he amused himself with the thought. He didn't care much for whatever romance competition was going on.

He had much more fun things to think about.

Like killing a person with cheese.

-At Grigori Base-

"... I felt a very uncomfortable feeling of fear while looking at this cheese." Kokabiel, one of the very leaders of the Grigori Fallen Angel groups under Azazel himself, spoke to himself as he looked away from his wine and cheese combination. He had hired a top notch assassin group to steal a couple of Holy Excalibur Swords from the Church, and he had great plans to fuse them together in order to create a powerful weapon to start a new war with.

A war that would rip tensions between the three big races to pieces, and spark a second great war of such intensity that it would be hundreds of years before peace reigned again.

He felt a very real, and very strange fear of the cheese he was eating, as if the spirit of death was hovering over it as he ate it.

"Sir, you're sweating."

"It's no matter... so, you really plan to betray Azazel in order to help me start a war Satanael?" Kokabiel asked his fellow Fallen Angel.

Satanael just smiled.

"Of course, it does line up with my goal of evolving more Sacred Gear into Longinus. In that town there exist several Sacred Gears that have the potential to become even greater. I wish to see more Sacred Gears with god-killing potential, and a chaotic war would be the fastest way to achieve that." Satanael had been asked by Kokabiel personally if he would join him in his quest to take our the sisters of two of the Great Satans. "So why, if I may ask, are you fearfully looking at cheese?" Satanael asked as Kokabiel looked back at the cheese.

"I truly, very well and truly, have no clue why this cheese is so ominous to me. It's like, for a second I invisioned myself being killed by cheese." Kokabiel still had no clue why he had that feeling.

It made no sense.

"Well, you should let it Brie and not think about this in Queso you lead yourself to a Grate and pitiful end." Satanael made a slight joke at Kokabiel's unexpected fear.

Kokabiel just looked at him with deadpan eyes.

"Why are you like this? Why are you inventor types all like this?"

Seriously, why couldn't he find other traitors like him, who just wanted war for the sake of war's sake. He had such high hopes for Freed, but his disciple had been murdered in the very city that he planned on going to and starting a war.

-Back at Kuoh-

"See all of you later, I'm going to go train with cheese." Naruto would want to find any way to get himself out of this situation anyway. They were unlikely to follow him if he proclaimed that he was going to train with cheese, since the absolute insanity of that statement would leave people dumbfounded.

"... Really?"

"Yes, I'm going to summon a servant and throw cheese at them. I think Rider will be most useful for this training, since she is hyper aware of her surroundings." Naruto walked away from them all. He planned on skipping the rest of the school day anyway, and it wasn't like he even needed the education anymore.

He was literally the Ruler of Japan.

He was no longer a King without a Kingdom, he had conquered Japan and made it into his Kingdom even if the people were unaware of this fact at the moment. He kept his own achievement a secret not because he cared, but because he needed to keep his identity a secret for when he conquered other nations.

"All of this for a joke?" Koneko asked him with a raised eyebrow.

Naruto stopped and turned around.

"A joke? The warrior queen Medb was killed by cheese, one of histories greatest Queens had been killed by a man who practiced with cheese so much that he turned it into a lethal weapon. It's not just a joke, I wish to master the skills that killed the great rulers of the past, so that when I am faced with these skills myself that I will not be taken by surprise. If I am attacked while eating, and my only weapon is cheese, then I am perfectly prepared for a large scale combat! I will train to turn all objects in my hands into deadly weapons." Naruto gave a grande speech about the importance of learning from the past.

The fact was that by learning to master Cheese Combat, he would learn how to avoid being killed by surprise food attacks. He would become a step closer to being a King with no Weakness.

"Just admit that you want to be known as a King who can even kill somebody with cheese, that way your reputation and strength become even greater." Ravel deadpanned at him.

Killing somebody with a sword? Basic strength.
Killing somebody with cheese? Chad move right there.

That was a real flex right there.

"Why are you assuming we're going to have another enemy?" Asia asked Naruto with a tilted head.

That was a dangerous assumption.

"Uzumaki Luck, good for some things, bad for many others. I'm sure that soon enough, some powerful enemy will come to town looking to start a fight. When he or she does, I'm going to kill them with cheese." Naruto deadpanned at her. He was sure that more enemies were going to come.

He was also 100% sure he would kill with strongest enemy there with cheese.

Just to flex on them.

Chapter End!
Please Leave Me Lots of Nice Long Reviews, But No Flames Please!

1. A new spin on the Koneko-Ravel dynamic.
2. Just remember, no matter how bad your day is, Queen Medb was killed by cheese to the head.
3. I'm in a good mood right now, so I'm going to have a little review competition.

The Competition
During the 1 Month Training montage with the Gremory Peerage, I plan to insert another arc.
The Reviewers can put forth their ideas for what they would like to see, and if I like the general idea I will find a way to realistically put it into the plot.

The Rules
1. Put your idea in the form of a review.
2. Actually explain what you would really enjoy seeing.
3. At the end of your review, fill in this blank with a fun nickname
"Naruto the (Blank) King" or "Naruto the King of (Blank)" Fill in that title, which will become one of Naruto's titles at the end of the Mini-Arc.