Stay calm. Stay calm. Stay calm. "Hello, I'm Viktor Nikiforov."
"As if we don't all know." Everyone shares a laugh, but Viktor's comes out a little strained. "Let's just jump right into it. Something tells me you want to get started. I know we do." The TV host waves for the audience to make some noise, gaining cheers from everyone backstage. Viktor's grateful it's fake cheering, that there's no real audience.
"I see no problem with that at all." Viktor shakes his platinum bangs out of his eyes and nervously tucks a loose strand behind his left ear.
"Perfect!" She flips her own hair behind her shoulder, facing Viktor fully now on the stool she's sitting on. "We're all dying to know. Who is the mystery man you've been spotted with?" She balances her chin on the back of her hand. "There are so many stories going around with different speculations. I'd like to know which one is real."
"The one about him being my date is the closest story to the truth." Viktor winks at the camera, but it's meant for Yuuri, who's standing directly behind the camera while waiting for his cue. The "audience" collectively oohs and ahhs at the news.
"Well, you have to give us more details now! Your adoring fans need to know, myself included." She laughs and gestures for Viktor to continue.
Deep breath. Stay relaxed. Cool, calm, and collected. "His name is Yuuri Katsuki, and he's the kindest, most loving and caring person I've ever met."
"Could that happen to be the same Yuuri Katsuki, who's here with us today?" She gasps as Viktor laughs.
"It would be, yes. Yuuri, would you care to join us?" Viktor holds a hand out for Yuuri, who blushes at the gestures, takes a deep breath, and walks up to them. Viktor's heart leaps in his chest, whether from nerves or happiness, as Yuuri places his hand in his and sits down in the chair next to Viktor's.
"Dobro pozhalovat, Mr. Katsuki!"
Viktor whispers the translation in his ear, smiling when Yuuri tightens his grip on Viktor's hand. "S-Spasibo. Please, call me Yuuri." Russian sounds out of place coming from Yuuri, but Viktor finds it attractive that he's trying.
"How did you two meet? Sight-seeing? Maybe a project together? Yuuri, you certainly are good-looking enough for modeling."
Yuuri practically shrinks into his seat, the red dusting of his cheeks giving away his embarrassment. Viktor laughs and leans into him. "It's a lot more complicated than that actually."
The host leans forward in her seat again, clearly interested. "Go on."
"Yuuri, you're still okay with this, right?" Viktor nervously glances at him one last time as he whispers his question.
Yuuri nods and directs his attention away from all the lights and cameras to Viktor. "Yes." The twinge of anxiousness seeps into the one word, but he still looks sure of it.
Viktor nods back and whispers, "Keep your eyes on me if you're scared," before turning back to the host. "A few years ago, I started visiting a hospital nearby to pass time. Eventually I found how welcoming everyone there was and continued to visit the children there weekly. One day while I was visiting, I was informed of a new patient that had arrived. I came back the next week and decided to visit them. There, I met Yuuri Katsuki." Yuuri clings to Viktor's arm. Viktor can tell he's afraid of how everyone is going to receive the next part of the news. "Yuuri has a condition that... doesn't allow him to do much of anything. He's been hospitalized for five years straight, and there's no known cure for what he has."
Everyone goes silent as Viktor explains what Yuuri has without explicitly saying how bad it really is.
"It's tough. I know how hard he has it, but it's difficult to see him in so much pain." Viktor tenses, not allowing tears to fall on national TV, but he can feel them rising to his eyes.
"Viktor..." Yuuri places his other gloved hand on top of their joined hands.
"My heart goes out to you both. That is such a touching story. We wish you both sincere happiness."
.
. . .
.
"Yuuri?" Viktor fiddles with his fingers in the driver's seat. They're still in the parking lot of the studio, Viktor not even having started the vehicle up yet.
Yuuri gazes at him with wide eyes, curious as to what Viktor has to say. "Yes, Viktor?"
Viktor takes a deep breath and his gaze takes on a more confident one. "I've already decided on this, so you can't tell me no." The curious tilt of Yuuri's head deepens along with his brows in worry. "I have decided that... I'm going to take over all the finances your family has to oversee."
Yuuri's jaw drops through the medical mask he wears as the realization of what Viktor has said dawns on him. "V-Vik-"
"You've told me how much your family has done for you. How much of a sacrifice they've had to make since everything first started. It's been eating away at the back of my mind for a while now, and during our interview, it had me thinking. I have more than enough to handle all the expenses, so why aren't I doing anything about it? All I'm doing is visiting you, without so much as trying to offer support while your parents pay for everything. You're undergoing top-notch medical procedures in a different country, while being unable to see your family. That's why I've made the decision I have." Viktor searches Yuuri's face as he sits silently in the car, nervously toying with the stitching on the leather car seat.
"Viktor, I could never ask that of you." Yuuri diverts his attention to the stitch that has come undone in his nervous hands, twirling it around and around his finger as his face takes on a reddish hue. "Really. I'm okay. I don't want to be a burden to you."
"Who said you were a burden?" Viktor pleads internally for Yuuri to look up and meet his gaze, rather than the shy glances he's sparing the Russian.
"I would be if you did that." Yuuri shakes his head, strands of raven hair fall out of place from where it was slicked back earlier. "Thank you for offering, but I don't want you to." Yuuri finally looks up to catch Viktor's heartbroken expression. "Viktor?"
"Yuuri, please let me do this for you. I just want to be able to help in some way, and right now I'm not able to. If I helped you out financially, it would make me feel better. Like you actually need me. Please let me do this. Please." He can't help the tear that slips past his eye or the second and third that threaten to chase after it.
"V-Viktor? Are you crying?" Yuuri's eyes are wide again, panic evident across his features as he takes in the mess Viktor knows he looks like now.
"Of course I am. I'm upset!" They say nothing, silence enveloping them both and hanging heavy in the air around them. Viktor chokes out a few sobs before calming down more. "I just want to do this one little thing for you and your family."
"Viktor, I understand, but that's too much to be asking of you. My parents won't tell me how much most of my treatment is, but I've seen a few of the papers get passed around. I can't possibly ask someone I haven't known that long to do something to that extent." Yuuri leans forward in his seat.
Viktor stills suddenly, Yuuri's words hitting him like a ton of bricks. "I can't possibly ask someone I haven't known that long to do something to that extent." The words run over and over in his mind until he feels burned out. "I see... You're right. We haven't known each other for very long, now have we?" Viktor starts up the car and throws it into reverse, blinking back the tears more now than he was. Chris was right. He was giving his everything to someone who wasn't planning as far ahead as Viktor was. Maybe he did throw himself in too deep too quickly. But they were dating now, weren't they? Was what he said really too much for the time they've known each other? "I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused you."
"Viktor?"
"I'm truly sorry, Yuuri."
Neither say anything the entire way back to the hospital, too lost in their thoughts for conversation. Once every few minutes, Viktor would catch Yuuri staring at him through the rearview mirror, but brown eyes flit to the window as soon as they met ice blue. For every stoplight they hit, Yuuri would stare longer, as if he wanted to say something. Whatever thoughts that were running in his head pushed down the words, though, keeping the silence between them still.
When they return to the hospital and Yuuri is back in his room being handed the proper medication he needs to take, Viktor sits in the same plastic chair he always sits in to visit him and mulls over their conversation. Even long after Yuuri's situated do they find themselves sitting in the same silence as before.
Until Yuuri breaks it.
"Okay."
Viktor snaps out of his stupor, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. "What?"
Yuuri takes a deep breath and bites his lip before speaking again. "Okay. You can help pay."
Viktor's eyes widen as the realization slowly sinks in, a smile glowing brightly on his face. "Really?!"
"If you really want to, but you have to talk to my parents first." Yuuri is biting harder into his lip now.
"I will. Thank you so much, Yuuri." Is it too much to say I love you right now? Viktor wants to, but he's afraid of what that'll cause considering the events they've been through today. Yuuri already looks ready to snap, and Viktor doesn't want to push him more than he has. "Really. Thank you."
"I should be saying that to you." Yuuri peeks at him through his lashes, pink spreading across his cheeks. It's adorable, and Viktor can't help but be more grateful than he already was to have met someone as amazing as Yuuri.
"No need to. We'll talk more about this later. You need sleep. Rest, moya lyubov." Viktor leaps out of his chair and presses a hand to the window longingly as Yuuri smiles back, more settled than he was.
"Alright. Bye, Viktor." He waves as Viktor goes to take his leave from the room.
"Bye, Yuuri!" With a skip in his step and a tune on his tongue, Viktor briskly walks out of the hospital and towards his car.
.
. . .
.
Viktor grimaces as his phone goes off for the hundredth time, Yakov shooting him another glare as Yurio rolls his eyes.
"Shut that damn thing off before I break it, Vitya. We're in the middle of something important right now." Yakov's words are just shy of him yelling, but the sharp sting of them still have Viktor flinching as he reaches for the device tucked in the pocket of his blazer, setting it on silence. He's more rung out than he's been in a while, and if he's being honest, this meeting isn't something he wants to be in right now.
He ignores most of it, hoping for time to fly faster than it was. Unfortunately, every time he checks his watch, only a minute or two has passed. He finds himself spending more of his energy on trying to ignore the stares Mila is sending his way, wishing she won't pry into anything too deeply when they're let out for the day. It's a wish no one is going to hear, though. As the hour drags on, Yakov talks about a new collaboration with Chris's team and an up-and-coming photographer that's been making a name for himself as of lately. Boring. Dull. He's tapping his fingers anxiously, waiting for the moment Yakov tells them to leave as he makes his final remarks. He's counting down bated breaths until the exact words he's been waiting for are spoken. Viktor bolts from the room faster than he has in a while and reaches for the phone in his pocket. Now if he was correct, the hospital should've been the one trying to call him earlier...
"Viktor, you don't look okay. Are you alright?"
Viktor spins around on his heels and stares blankly at Mila, groaning as she tries to match her pace to his. "What do you want, Mila?"
"I just want to know if you're okay."
Viktor chuckles humorlessly at her words. He's too strung tight for this kind of conversation right now. "You're asking me if I'm alright?"
"Yes?" She seems baffled by his odd response to what was supposed to be an easy question.
"It doesn't matter how I feel." And then the words spill from him like he's drunk. It's like a pencil snapping in half or an elastic snapping after being pulled too tightly. Viktor has hit that point, and he's sure Mila has been waiting for it to happen. "Yuuri is still in pain. Yuuri is still hurting. It doesn't matter how I feel because I'm healthy. Compared to him, I'm beyond healthy. I don't matter, Mila." His words sound harsh, but he can't help it. He's been pushed beyond what he can handle in the past week since he took on Yuuri's payments, and the stress is eating him alive.
"I'm asking because you look like you haven't slept or eaten in days. You can't possibly call that healthy." Mila sets a careful arm on Viktor's own, worry creasing her brows.
Viktor shrugs the arm off apathetically. "I'm fine. There are worse things to worry about than my condition." He stalks off without another word, too consumed by his thoughts and agenda for the day to care.
Mila doesn't just stand off, and it's starting to annoy Viktor. It annoys him now of all times when he just wants to be alone and figure things out. Instead, she's trailing behind him, not saying anything explicitly, but he knows. And he knows that she knows.
"Back off, Mila. I'm okay."
"You're lying. Just tell me what's wrong."
"I can't, okay?!" Viktor runs a tired hand through his unkempt locks. "Sorry." He turns and rushes down the stairs to the main lobby of the building. Too tired to think properly. Too exhausted for this.
Mila apparently isn't. She's bounding down the stairs in his footsteps. "Why not? You always tell me what's wrong, so what's different this time? Is it about Yuuri?"
"Alright!" Viktor whips around on the last set of steps to face her, "Let me rephrase. I can, but I don't want to. Now leave me be." He turns around again and continues his descent.
"I can't."
Viktor stops at the foot of the stairs but doesn't face her. "Why not?"
"Because you're my friend, and there's something wrong. I want to help, Viktor. That's what friends do."
"You can't help with everything. This is something I have to handle on my own." Viktor pushes passed the doors with his phone now held up to his ear, a familiar number already ringing.
Mila is left staring at him from the middle of the staircase as he leaves.
.
. . .
.
"Right. Yes. Don't worry at all. I have it covered. No, the quarterly payment already went through. I know how much is left. Yes, I- Yes, I already paid that forward. Of course I know. I understand. Do svidaniya." Viktor throws his phone across the passenger seat and sets his forehead against the cool leather of the steering wheel. He shuts his eyes and slowly counts to ten in Russian. It doesn't help in the least bit.
"Why can't anything go right?!" He slams his hands against the sides of the wheel in frustration.
Since he decided he was going to pay for everything involving Yuuri's treatment, he's been getting calls about every single procedure. He loves knowing what's going on with Yuuri, but the endless calls are starting to get on his nerves. On top of the calls, he's also had to handle the paperwork involved with transferring all the payments to his account instead of Yuuri's family's accounts. There are meetings he has to attend every week to hear every new development they've come up with. That's another thing he doesn't mind knowing, but it's frustrating to hear week in and week out that there's hardly any progress. Yuuri is dying, and the only one who seems to care in those meetings is Viktor. They only care that someone valuable with a condition no one's heard of has almost no time left, not about the actual person. For someone who loves that person, it's hard to just sit there and listen in.
The passenger side door opens, and it startles Viktor out of his thoughts. When he sees the tufts of dyed blond hair, he relaxes a little, though he's still far too rigid to be calm.
"Want to talk about it?"
Viktor grunts and throws his head back on the headrest of the seat. "I don't know how people do this."
"You may have mentioned that before to me. Details?" Chris mimics Viktor's position, staring at the roof of the car.
"Too many." Viktor digs the palms of his hands into his now-closed eyes.
"Mila was upset."
"She was being nosy. If I wanted to talk, I would've. She should know this by now."
Chris sighs and trains hazel eyes on his friend's stiff form. "That doesn't mean you yell at her. I'm pretty sure everyone in the building heard you."
"Then they'll know to leave me alone this week. When do you plan on going back to Switzerland?" Viktor drops his hands and returns Chris' gaze.
Chris narrows his eyes at him. "Don't change the subject. You know Mila is right. That's why you yelled at her. I think you should talk to someone about what's going on. All anyone knows is whatever information is written in magazines about you two. Some are speculating that you broke up. Everyone started taking bets in the agency, myself included. I said you two got into an argument. Am I right?"
"Is this all just a joke to you? I don't want to talk to someone who can't take anything seriously." Viktor fumbles for the car keys in his pocket before placing them in the ignition.
"You need to relax. Go to a spa or something." When he gets a glare in response, Chris rolls his eyes. "I can't do much if you won't tell me anything."
"He's worse, but it's not like the last time." Viktor waits for a response, only to get encouragement from Chris to continue on. "They're saying he's... he's reaching his breaking point. They're in a rush to get all this new testing done for him, but nothing's helping. The last one they did on Tuesday only made his condition worse. He's coughing up blood now at random intervals. His fever won't go down either. He's hit a wall, and they can't get him back. They said if nothing changes then..."
"I understand."
"Do you?!" Viktor's tone screams desperation. It's a call for help, but no one's been able to hear it. He's hoping Chris can. "Because so far everyone's been treating this like he's some kind of experiment, and if he's gone, then their chances at recognition are gone as well! No one even cares that he has loved ones that want him around. That need him! I need him here, Chris! I need to hear his voice, whether it's through some kind of device or in person, I don't care! I need to hear him, though! I feel like I'm the only one who visits him to see how he really feels!" There are hot trails of tears streaming down his face, but Viktor can't find it in himself to care.
Chris doesn't know what to do, and Viktor can see that. He's able to recognize that look from a million miles away because it's the same look everyone wears when they visit Yuuri. He's sick of seeing it. "You told me to handle this like an adult. Are you happy now? Is this what you wanted?"
"Viktor..." Chris reaches over and pulls Viktor into a hug. "I just want you to finally be happy. I've seen you struggle to find that for years. We all have seen it. Some more often than others."
Viktor shoves Chris off in one swift movement. "I hope you're satisfied now then. Just get out so I can visit Yuuri already. Visiting hours are almost over."
Chris steps out of the car but hangs on to the door. "You've been visiting him a lot more recently."
"Wouldn't you do the same if the one you loved was dying?" Viktor has the steering wheel in his vice-like grip again, hair falling in front of his eyes as he hangs his head.
Chris sighs and shuts the door, walking away from the vehicle.
Viktor lets the tears fall again, only this time harder and the sobs are louder. No one understands, and no one ever will.
.
. . .
.
Viktor walks through the mass of reporters and cameramen, unenthusiastic to see them or answer any of the questions hurled his way. Every day has been the same since Viktor announced his relationship and Yuuri had openly talked about his condition. From every visit Viktor's taken, they've somehow spun a new story around their relationship. It's been a week since the announcement, and so far the stories have ranged from Viktor has what Yuuri has now, they're breaking up, Viktor's found someone else, and even to Viktor's suing the hospital. How that last story came around is still a mystery to him.
The sliding doors to the hospital open with a swish, and soon enough he's checking himself in for the millionth time in the past week. Everyone in the hospital knows who he is now and knows why he's here. He's glad because he doesn't like answering all the same questions again and again.
He shouldn't be as surprised as he is when he hears that Yuuri has visitors. Of course Yuuri has visitors. Viktor just forgets that there are some people who really care about Yuuri besides himself. No reporters and no cameramen. When Viktor enters the small meeting room he's called home the past week, he sees a couple standing by the glass and Yuuri is sitting in a chair close to the window with tears in his eyes. He notes that there's also a nurse standing off to the side in the room with Yuuri again.
Viktor feels out of place when they start speaking Yuuri's native tongue and Yuuri answers back. He shifts from foot to foot as he picks at the bouquet of blue roses he's holding. Yuuri must end up noticing him because then he's calling Viktor's name.
"Viktor, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were here." Yuuri turns his attention to Viktor and soon the couple does the same.
"You must be Vicchan." The older woman is smiling at him.
It's odd to hear his name pronounced like that, but it's probably a nickname or some other in their language. "I didn't realize I was interrupting. I can come back another time." Viktor forces a smile and turns to leave, only to be stopped by Yuuri.
"Actually I'm glad you came now. Viktor, these are my parents."
Viktor turns around and eyes the couple then he looks at Yuuri. He goes between them for a moment before everything clicks. "Oh! It's a pleasure to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Katsuki. I'm Viktor Nikiforov."
Mrs. Katsuki laughs, and he finds where Yuuri gets his laugh from. "Please, call me Hiroko. I'm so happy I get to finally meet you." She takes Viktor's right hand, the hand that isn't holding the flowers, and gives him another heartwarming smile. "We've heard all about you from our darling Yuuri."
Viktor glances over her shoulder to see Yuuri burying his face in his hands. He laughs and smiles back at Hiroko. "As am I. Yuuri only talks goodwill of you both. I can see why now. Thank you for bringing the love of my life into this world." Viktor peeks at Yuuri from the side of his eye and finds him gawking at Viktor. Adorable.
Yuuri's father strides up to them and shakes his hand when Hiroko lets go. "You have my blessing, son."
Viktor isn't sure what that means until he really thinks about it. The unknowing grin turns into wide eyes and red cheeks instantly. "I h-haven't... Yuuri is... T-Thank you, sir. Your son is a gift to this world and everyone he meets. I would never forgive myself if I hurt him in any way." He's a stuttering, flustered mess at the image his mind has conjured up. Yuuri in a wedding tux that matches the one Viktor's wearing himself... Them placing rings on the other's right ring finger... Flowers surrounding them as everyone claps and cheers... Yuuri beaming at Viktor passed the rim of his blue glasses and slicked back bangs trying to break free... It's so embarrassing that that's what he's thinking of right now.
When Viktor glances over at Yuuri, he finds that he's just as much of a flustered mess as he is himself. At least he wasn't the only one.
"I'm only kidding you. Call me Toshiya." Toshiya lets go of Viktor's hand and steps back behind Hiroko, both smiling widely at him.
"I'm glad I finally got the chance to meet you both in person, Hiroko and Toshiya." It's different hearing them through a phone as they discuss important matters such as their son's medical expenses to now as they officially introduce themselves. He's more nervous than the first time he called them.
"We can't stay much longer, but we'll be in town for the next few days. We'll make sure we visit you as often as we can, Yuuri!" Toshiya grins at his son, who smiles back in earnest.
"Thank you. I'll see you soon then." When both parents leave, Yuuri brings his attention back to Viktor, who has centered himself more in the now spacious room. "I didn't think you were coming today. I thought you said you had a lot of meetings today." Yuuri stares quizzically at the other before turning red. "I-It's not like I don't enjoy you being here or anything! I just thought you were busy! That's all!"
Viktor smiles and sits down in the chair Yuuri's mother occupied before. "I don't think Yakov wants to see me for the rest of the day. He was pretty fed up with me after the first meeting."
Yuuri frowns, and oh boy he knows he's about to get scolded. "Viktor, what happened?"
"It's nothing you need to worry about." He waves the hand that isn't holding the flowers to dismiss the topic. "How are you, though? I wasn't in the right state of mind to ask anyone about your condition when I entered. Besides, hearing from you is better than hearing from them." Viktor turns more serious as he looks Yuuri up and down, examining him with sharp, ice blue eyes.
Yuuri grimaces, and right away Viktor knows the answer, even without hearing it. "I've been okay."
"I know it must hurt, Yuuri. I'm so so sorry. I promise I have everyone working as hard as they can. If I could become a doctor just so I could help, I would."
Yuuri laughs lightly, but it still sounds pained. "I can picture you doing that."
Viktor grins back, trying to alleviate the tension in the room. "I was tempted to hire foreign doctors, but I know you wouldn't have wanted me to. It was the only thought that prevented me from doing so."
"I'm glad you had it then. Honestly, it would've been too overwhelming." Yuuri coughs violently into his arm and winces when he sees red stain the inside of his elbow.
To distract both Yuuri and himself, Viktor decides to change the topic as the nurse in the corner of the rushes to aid him with the clean-up. "Oh! Before I forget, I brought you more of those blue roses you love. I saw that the one's I gave you before were wilting, so I had to buy new ones." Viktor holds up the bouquet for him to see, and Yuuri's eyes sparkle.
"Thank you, Viktor!" Yuuri turns to his nurse and asks her to grab the flowers once she's done helping him. She walks out of the room, and within a minute, she's taking the bouquet from Viktor and walking back into Yuuri's room.
"Vitya." Viktor almost laughs at the confused expression Yuuri is wearing.
"What?" He's tilting his head and furrowing his eyebrows now.
"It's uhh... nevermind. Forget I said anything." A blush begins to form across Viktor's cheeks, and he begins willing it to disappear.
"No, wait! You can't just say something and then say nevermind." Yuuri pouts, and Viktor becomes putty in his hands.
"Well... uhh... in Russian," he hates himself for saying anything now because he's just as embarrassed as he was with their wedding in his mind, "people who are close to each other call them by their nicknames. There are... certain... endings that express different things. Whether you hate someone, or you know... like someone... they get an ending to their nickname that represents that." Viktor has to fight for every word that he's saying. He's so embarrassed, but he's trying his best not to show it. It's not working.
He waits as Yuuri tries to process the new information, his face lighting up immediately when he understands it. "Oh! So it's like how in Japan where we add -chan or -kun to someone's name?"
"A little, yes. The only difference is that they're very personal." Why is he actually telling Yuuri this? Picturing them getting married was less embarrassing than this now, and Viktor knows it's showing on his face.
Yuuri places a hand to his chin in wonder. "So you must've said your nickname. What is it?" His brown eyes are lit up, sparkling despite the terrible lighting the hospital offers.
"It's not that important..." Viktor laughs nervously, fidgeting in his seat. He can imagine Yurio's look of disgust if he saw him right now.
"But now I want to know." The pout is back on Yuuri's face, deeper than it was a minute ago.
"Vitya..." Viktor mumbles out the word, hoping, wishing, Yuuri wouldn't press further.
"Hmm?"
"Vitya." Viktor can feel the heat on his face spread from his cheeks to his neck. "Don't feel obligated to use it or anything! I don't even know why I brought it up. Haha! Feel free to just-"
"Vitya."
All the words Viktor was going to say become a jumbled mess in his head as he stares at Yuuri in disbelief. Sure, the word came off his tongue awkwardly, but somehow that's what makes the effect the word has on him even worse.
"Did I say that right, Vitya?" Yuuri has no idea what he's doing. His pure intentions leave him dumbfounded as Viktor tries to piece together words.
"I... uh... wow. Yes. Okay." It's not even that personal of a nickname, but coming from Yuuri, it might as well be a proposal. Then again, he dubs anything said by Yuuri nothing less than amazing. "Vitya is a nickname used by my friends. So like Chris, Yurio, Mila..."
"Then what should I call you?" The blush on Yuuri's face is just as bad as Viktor's own.
Viktor almost stutters over his words. "I don't care what you call me, but um... in terms of lovers, my nickname would be... Viten'ka..."
Yuuri bites his lips for a moment, worrying it with his teeth. "Viten'ka."
Viktor is gone. He's done for. Yuuri has ended him. Wishing he could just melt if he hasn't already, Viktor buries his face in his hands.
"I-Is that how you pronounce it? Viten'ka?" Yuuri sounds flustered as well as genuinely worried that he mispronounced it. If only he knew.
"Yuuri, you're killing me." Viktor groans as he tries to hide further.
"I-I'm sorry..."
Viktor snaps his head up to find Yuuri digging into his bottom lip again. He laughs at how oblivious Yuuri is to the mess he has become. "Yuuri, you said it perfectly. I just..." Viktor clears his throat, "wasn't expecting you to... I've never heard anyone actually call me that. It's... not what I expected." He grins, biting back words that'll only make him sound stupid.
"Oh..." Whatever Yuuri's thinking can't be good because his face drops to his hands, fingers gripping his sweatpants at his thighs tightly.
"In a good way! A... very good way..." Viktor tries to reassure him, his own hands reaching to ruffle his platinum bangs.
Yuuri's face perks up, and once he sees Viktor's real distress, he starts giggling. "So even the great Viktor Nikiforov gets embarrassed."
"Only because of you, Yuuri." Viktor sighs and smiles in return, a faint red still staining his cheeks. "Only ever because of you."
"That's not fair." Yuuri whines as his face begins to match Viktor's in color.
The rest of Viktor's visit is spent exactly like back: the both of them teasing each other back and forth, while Yuuri uses Viktor's newfound nickname to cause him further distress. Like every visit with Yuuri, the time passes by in a blur as he finds himself exiting the hospital. The swarm of reporters and cameramen has thinned out, but not so much where Viktor can pass by them comfortably. He's still pushing past people in order to get to his car. It'll die down soon, he thinks. The chaos surrounding him and Yuuri. He's only a model, not an Olympic athlete or celebrity singer, so it can't last forever.
The ride back to his flat is short and uneventful as it usually is. The stress and panic from earlier gone after visiting Yuuri. You would think it would eat at him more, plague his mind like it had, after seeing the one it centered around, but instead it becomes just a thought in the back of his head. He'll worry about it more tomorrow. Viktor can't find the energy in himself to dwell on it now. It's late, and he has a date with his bed that he would really like to get to.
He grabs the comfiest clothes he owns, changes, and flops down on his mattress with his hair splaying out against his pillow. Instead of dozing off like he expected he would, his eyes are open and staring off into the darkness his room offers.
It's strange how life works out. Viktor was alone for years, the comfort of friends not enough to pull him out of the daze he fell into. No matter how many parties Chris brought him to or the people he was introduced to, nothing was ever enough. Now, his life has been turned upside down by an unsuspecting Japanese man, who found a way into his empty heart. It's almost dreamlike how everything's happened, and he wouldn't want it any other way. Except if maybe Yuuri felt better...
Viktor sighs and turns onto his right side, now facing the window that takes up the entire wall looming over Saint Petersburg. He sighs again as lights from cars and neighboring buildings flicker in the darkness. Instead of thinking, he lays there gazing out at the streets, letting sleep consume him.
.
. . .
.
The world is apparently against him ever getting beauty sleep. One day, it's Yurio banging on his door, and the next it's his phone blaring in his ears. Viktor wakes up out of his haze with a start as the sound of violins shakes him out of sleep. He twists around trying to find the source of the sound, only to see a new call lighting up his lockscreen. Scrambling for the device, Viktor swipes right to answer it, pulling the phone up to his ear.
"Mm... privyet?"
The voice on the other end spits out Russian, giving Viktor news that has him fully awake. The conversation through the phone doesn't last long since the urgency on the other end cuts it short abruptly. Viktor's mind is scrambling to hold on to something before he snaps, tugging at silver locks as he struggles to get a grasp on his breathing. When he thinks he's finally registered the news, he throws the sheets off of him and rushes around to get ready for the day. Although he was told not to come in... that it would only make him feel worse about a situation "they have a grasp on". Viktor's not sure if he can trust them, but they've been keeping Yuuri alive, and that's all that matters right now.
Because Yuuri is going in for emergency surgery.
The doctor he spoke with assured him it was easy, and he has nothing to worry about, but how can he not? Yuuri's state is already wilting, and an emergency surgery isn't exactly going to ease his mind. They said it was to open up a path for him to breathe better. From what he understood, Yuuri started choking early this morning and was having difficulty breathing. They immediately started prepping him for surgery, while one doctor called to inform Viktor about what was happening. He's grateful for his connections in the hospital, otherwise he would have no idea about what's going on.
Viktor's pacing around his apartment, his appearance expressing how he truly feels in that moment. He only manages to throw on a rumpled white dress shirt and black trousers, not really bothering to fix his hair or anything for that matter. He's holding his phone tightly in the palm of his hand as he paces, waiting on the hospital to call him back with word on how it goes.
One hour passes. Then another. And soon a third.
It's when the fifth hour comes around when Makkachin is woken up from his position next to Viktor on the couch as his phone rings. Immediately, he answers, presses it to his ear, and then he's back to pacing. Russian passes back and forth between him and the doctor on the other line, worry and concern turning into a settled sigh and relaxed shoulders. When the call ends, he sits back down on the couch and sinks into the cushions.
"He's going to be okay, Makkachin, but they won't let me visit him. How cruel of them." Viktor faces the poodle, who whines in response. He huffs to himself as he runs a hand through the brown fur. "I wish you could meet him. He's kind, loving, oh and he has the most adorable-" He's cut off as his phone rings again. It's definitely not the hospital, so he can't possibly imagine who- Oh.
"Privyet, Yakov!" The cheery tone comes naturally to him now that he's calmed down from the hectic and nerve-wrecking morning he's already had.
The call involves a lot of yelling on Yakov's end. Today is the first day of the collaborative shoot, and oops Viktor forgot. It's hard to remember something like that when the love of your life is in the hospital fighting against something he might die from. Really, the shoot was not on his list of priorities, but Yakov yells back that it should be.
Viktor's been known to have tons of stupid ideas. Too many for a Russian male of only twenty-eight. And the one he's thought of will potentially be the second dumbest one he's had. Second because Chris will argue that the day out with Yuuri holds the number one spot. He tells Yakov that he'll head down to the studio soon, not explaining anything more as he hangs up on the CEO. Viktor pets Makkachin once more before he gets ready for the day, shoving one half of a bagel in his mouth as he leaves his flat with the other half in his hand.
When he gets to the studio, everyone waves and welcomes him, unsurprised when he shows up late. It doesn't take him long to hunt down Yakov, who's talking to a small group of people working on the project. Yakov spots Viktor out of the corner of his eyes when he waltzes up to the older Russian.
"Took you long enough. We planned on starting with or without you. You need to learn time management, Vitya. I don't want to have to-"
"Yakov, can we talk in private?" Viktor plasters on a smile as he leads Yakov into a secluded corner of the studio.
"I don't want to deal with-"
"I'm taking a leave of absence."
"You're what?!" Yakov's livid as he folds his arms over his chest.
"I don't know for how long, but I figured I could just call you when I wanted to return. If I wanted to return." Viktor folds his hands nicely in front of him, taking in the expression of the other. It's about the response he thought he would get, so nothing really surprises him.
"You'll be dead to everyone once you leave. Do you understand that? No one is going to wait around for you just because you decide to elope with some sickly-"
"I'm doing this because I chose to, not so I could run off with Yuuri." He emphasizes Yuuri's name because the thought of anyone calling him anything based off of what he has sickens him. "I've decided to personally take on all his payments, and it's getting hard to be here when I need to be there for him. I know what the risks are, and I don't mind. Yurio's great at what he does. He definitely won't be able to pass the career I've made, but he could get close."
Yakov narrows his eyes at him. "Do whatever you want. You'll have to come begging to me on your knees if you want to return." With that said, Yakov turns on his heels and strides away, leaving Viktor alone in the corner.
It's not the smartest thing he's done if he's completely honest with himself. He's made enough to get by for quite a while, though. On top of that, he'll get to spend more time focused on Yuuri rather than trying to split his attention two ways. It's for the best.
He sees Mila and Chris talking as he walks towards the exit of the studio. When they finally see him, he salutes them and pushes open the door to the studio, leaving them behind with their confused expressions.
This'll work out.
It has to.