Sorry that this took so long... I cut my finger making a salad... I had to get stitches...
Annabel felt awkward standing in the dining area, pretending to be occupied with her supplies as Arthur caught up with old friends. She didn't want to tear him from his friends, the ones who were so thrilled to see him. There was hugs given and snarky remarks thrown around even though there were laughs that echoed through the high ceilings.
She felt out of place, knowing well enough that they were from the good parts of his past. The part that he didn't ever want to forget, and the parts that he wished he had more memories with them. She didn't want to interject, in fact she tried to sneak out to her horse just to get some fresh air, but Arthur managed to catch her before she could.
"Oh, no you don't." he grabbed her by the shoulders and lightly guided her towards his old gang members.
"Arthur, please. You know how I am in social situations." She weakly protested, knowing well enough that he wasn't going to let her run away from this.
"They're old friends so I doubt they'll bite." She huffed and let him guide her towards the group, who all smiled at her.
God, this was worse they when she was at old family reunions. She wasn't to bury herself in the backyard.
"To think that our little Arthur would find a girl, and a pretty one at that." The blonde – Sadie if she remembered correctly – teased, "Sadie Adler," she extended her hand for Annabel to shake, which she did, "Sadie is fine with me." Her smile put Annabel in a calmer mood, but her shoulders were still stiff and tense, "That one over there is Charles, Scarface over there is John and the drunken fool is Uncle." She looked at each one that Sadie pointed at, and really hoped that she would remember.
"Abigail is sleeping in the room, and my son – Jack – is in his room reading."
"I'm Annabel, but most call me Anna."
"And you're the doctor?" Sadie asked, curious in something else then if Annabel was really the doctor.
"I wouldn't be here if I wasn't." she hoped that the comment didn't seem too forced, because it was.
Annabel still felt extremely out of place in the room, all of there were playful in their banter towards each other and she felt suffocated. She had to get out of this situation or she just might explode.
She waved her hand towards the group, "I hate to be a bother, but I would like to check on the mother to be." She held her hands clasped together in front of her, respectful and reserved giving Arthur an apologetic glance before John started to stand up.
"Right, I'll show –." Sadie waved at him and got up faster.
"Sit yer ass down, John. I'll show her." She walked over to Annabel, placing a hand on her back, "You've been a nag the whole damn week, and you need to relax." John let out a sigh as he settled in his seat again. She noticed his shoulders slump down as he leaned into the cushion a little more.
"Thank you, Sadie." Sadie started to walk towards some rooms and Annabel followed in haste.
"He's been hyping the whole thing since Charles and I arrived. He's too high strung when it comes to his wife."
"Most men are, from my experience. Husbands are protective of their wives and even more so if they're pregnant." Annabel looked behind her, towards Arthur with a worried look. She would have to talk to him later about this whole situation.
"Not your first rodeo, I take it?" Sadie noticed that Annabel was looking at Arthur, and smiled.
"Not in the slightest." She lingered on Arthurs form before looking at Sadie with a soft smile. "On average, I help birth a dozen babies a year."
Sadie knocked on the door that lead to the master bedroom, and Annabel her an annoyed groan.
"If it's John, you need to go away." Annabel smiled, and laughed softly.
"Abigail, the doctor is here." A relieved sigh was heard from the other side of the door.
"Come in." Sadie opened the door, letting Annabel enter first. "You must be Dr. Fletcher."
"Yes, I'm here to assist in your pregnancy." Annabel held herself high, shoulders back, head up and a soft and loving smile on her lips. "I just wanted to introduce myself and see where the baby is at and how you're feeling."
"Well, I feel heavily pregnant and my feet really hurt, but why do you need to check the baby?" Abigail struggled to sit up, but managed to do it with Annabel's help.
"I want to make sure that the baby is head first and not feet first." Annabel started to roll up her sleeves and sat herself on the edge of the queen sized bed. "Do you mind if I press on your stomach?" Abigail shook her head.
"Good ahead." Neither Annabel nor Abigail notice Sadie leave the room until she came over to the other side of the bed to place a gentle hand on Abigail's shoulder. Annabel pressed around on Abigail's swollen stomach, feeling for certain things within the womb.
"So far so good. The baby seems to be in position and should be due any day now." Abigail let out a relieved groan and slumped into the pillows.
"Thank god." Annabel smiled and gave a breathy laugh as she unrolled her sleeves.
"The hell did John do ta ya?" They all turned their heads towards the doorway, where Arthur leaned, "I don't think there's one baby in there." He chuckled, and Abigail sat up fast, causing Annabel to reach out to help her.
"Arthur?" he smiled, as he noticed the range of emotions run over her face. He knew he was going to get a good lecture from her, but right now all he could do was walk towards her and stand next to her bed.
"Hello, Abigail." Abigail threw off the blanket and tried to get onto her swollen feet, much to Annabel's dismay.
"Abigail, I don't recommend getting up so fast and not without help." Annabel chimed in, but she knew that it was just drowned out by Abigail's soft sobs. She wobbled as she got up and hugged Arthur.
"We thought you were dead! Charles went back for your body, but you weren't there when he went. We all thought that the Pinkerton's picked up your body."
"Easy, Abigail. Everythin's fine." He tried his best to soothe the crying, pregnant woman, but with little luck.
"How did you find us?" he shrugged and looked over at Annabel, who was frantically trying to get Abigail back on the bed.
"I didn't. She did." Annabel wasn't even paying attention to the little gleam in his eye as he pointed towards her.
"Abigail, I haven't finished my check up and I need you to get back to bed before I can let you walk around." Abigail eventually released Arthur and waddled back to her bed with some help from Annabel.
"John, Charles and I are gonna go hunting."
"No problem, we'll be here." She shooed him out of the room after she got Abigail in bed, "Just don't get shot at anymore. I'm tired of pulling bullets out of you." He chuckled and tipped his hat, as Sadie walked in. Annabel peered from the doorway, watching him leave with John through the front door.
"And you say he's not sweet on you." Annabel turned and looked at both Sadie and Abigail, who had large smiles on their faces.
"I don't know what you're talking about." Annabel walked away from the doorway, shaking her head in annoyance. Abigail's laugh radiated through Annabel, and she knew they weren't just going to drop it.
"Did you not see the little gleam in his eyes when he pointed to you?"
"No, because I was worrying about you hurting yourself by getting up so fast." She let out an exasperated sigh and threw her hands up, "Can I finish my check up before you two bombard me with any more questions about my relations with Arthur?" Abigail threw up her hand.
"Can I ask one thing?"
"Yes, Abigail?"
"Can I walk around outside after?"
With the help of Sadie and Annabel, Abigail was able to walk slowly into the living room even as she complained about how swollen her feet were. Annabel and Sadie laughed lightly as she continued to curse her husband, and how she was never having any more kids.
"Now I remember why I stayed in bed." She grumbled as they made it out of the hallway and into the living room.
"We can go back to the room?" Sadie chimed in only to receive a glare from Abigail.
"I'll be fine once we get to my chair." They took their time helping Abigail walk to the wooden rocking chair that sat close to the fireplace, something that she assumed was bought or made just for Abigail and the new addition.
"Let us know if you get to warm, okay?" Abigail nodded as Sadie left to get her a glass of water.
"So…" Sadie started from the kitchen, a mischievous tone in her voice, "You and Arthur, huh?" Annabel groaned and slumped onto the couch.
"It's not that special." She interjected, wishing they would drop the whole conversation all together. "I don't know why it's such a huge deal."
"For many reasons." Abigail added, and Sadie came in with her glass of water.
"He's sweet on you."
"I really don't know what you're talking about." Annabel sighed and rubbed her face. That was a total lie. She knew he was sweet on her, but she also knew herself and the fact that she wasn't ready for that sort of commitment, since her father's passing.
She didn't mind him being sweet on her though.
"We saw the way he looked at you. That man was never good at being subtle about certain feelings."
"Sadie's not wrong." Abigail sipped her water, "Romance was never his strong suit and even though women were always curious about him, he had other priorities thrown onto his shoulders."
"He's been with me for three or so years, he seems just fine with…" she waved her hands in the air, "things." They both look at her with surprise.
"Three years?"
"I saved him from that mountain three years ago." She chuckled at the memory, "He's a huge baby with injuries, you know. Does nothing but complain about it."
"Sounds about right." Sadie chuckled, placing a hand on Annabel's shoulder, "All I can say is thank you. For keeping him alive."
"He's hard to keep alive, you know." They all laugh, and Annabel listens to Sadie talk about the old days when they all ran with a gang. Arthur would never talk about those day, and Annabel never pushed because she knew how memories can hurt just too much.
They continue to talk to Annabel about those days on the run all over West Elizabeth and New Hanover, all the crazy adventures and missions that they did together. She noticed that Sadie focused on the positive aspects of their lives before this, and deep down Annabel knew they all had demons that they wanted to keep within them.
Laughter echoed through the living room as Arthur walked in with a pronghorn on his shoulder and a turkey in hand. John and Charles followed suit, rabbits and waterfowl all tied together.
"Hopefully this will be enough." The girls' laughter started to disperse once the men filed in and dropped off the hunted game in the kitchen.
"You know I'm not cooking!" Abigail called out and Annabel stifled a laugh. "I'm pregnant and actually comfortable for once, I'm not movin'."
"I ain't cookin' either. Did enough of that when we still rode with Pearson." Sadie grumbled, and Annabel stood up from her spot, rolling up her sleeves.
"Don't worry about it, I'll cook if it's not a problem." She didn't really wait for a response from anyone as she walked to the kitchen and shooed everyone out of it. She noticed Arthur's eyes on her as she leaned against the counter and let go of a deep sigh.
Annabel took a deep, steady breath and got to work skinning the animals.
And deep down, she prayed that the baby would come soon so she could leave this place as soon as possible.
Dinner came and went for Annabel, who zoned out for most of it. She knew they were talking to her, and she did her best to talk to them but for the most part she was disinterested. She sat there, slowly eating her food and watching how Arthur acted around his old friends. His smiles made her heart tighten and her stomach do flips and soon enough she found herself not able to eat anymore. She retired early, much to everyone's dismay and even Sadie came into the kitchen to check up on her.
Annabel forced herself to smile, but even she knew that Sadie wasn't buying it. Sadie pushed it a little bit, but Annabel merely shook her head and weakly tried to sooth Sadie's curiosity and worry. Sadie lingered as Annabel started to get to the dishes and finish cleaning up the kitchen.
"Hey, Arthur." Sadie pestered quietly, laying a hand on his shoulder. He looked up at her from his journal, pencil in his mouth and his face still flushed from the few glasses of whiskey from dinner. "What's up with Annabel?"
"She alright?" he closed his journal, turning towards Sadie with full attention.
"She seems, I don't know." She shrugged as she walked around to sit next to him, "Sad about something." Arthur's sigh felt heavy in his chest.
"Her father died a few months back and it's been hard on her lately."
"She's been strong around us, but it's taking a lot out of her huh."
"She wasn't expectin' all of us to know each other."
"I don't think anyone was expecting you to even be alive, let alone here." They both chuckled at that comment. Silence fell over them for a brief moment before Arthur let out a sigh.
"I feel like a damn fool." He rubs his eyes before pinching the bridge of his nose. "Sadie, I –."
"You've been sweet on her." He chuckled, not looking over at her.
"That obvious, huh." Sadie's smile was enough of an answer. "Who else knows?"
"Abigail, but I'm not sure about the boys." She tucked her bangs behind her ear, "And I'm pretty sure Annabel knows about it too. I would do something about it soon."
"What am I supposed to do?" he groaned in frustration, "She just lost her father, so I highly doubt she's ready to do anything." He looked over at her, still slightly flushed from the alcohol but he was starting to sober up. "Besides, I'm too old and I highly doubt I'm her first choice." Sadie laughed, almost in a mocking tone.
"You are old, but you've been with her, living with her for three year, getting to know her for three years. I highly doubt you're not her first choice."
"I guess you're right."
"I know I'm right." She lightly hit his shoulder with a smirk, "Make a move, before you lose your chance. I'm gonna go see if she needs any help with dishes."
Sadie let after that, leaving him with his thoughts and worries.
As night started to fall and everyone started to settle in and get ready for bed, Annabel found herself awake at the kitchen table, reading her maps with candle light. She took her pen across the map, marking the trails that would end up leading her to Trinidad in California.
The night was finally quiet, minus the loud snoring coming from Uncle in the Attic. Crickets and cicadas chirped and clicked and the coyote's high-pitched howls and yips echoed through the night sky and into the quiet house through the cracked window.
Annabel found herself staring out the window, leaning back in the creaky wooden chair an appreciating the full moon that lit up the flat valley and the rolling hills. Something tugged at her, whispering to her to go for a night right and enjoy the environment around her and soon enough she was blowing out the candles and tip toeing past both Sadie and Charles who were sleeping heavily in the living room.
Her boots slipped on with ease, and the door was quiet as it opened and closed with an easy click of the knob. The cold air was refreshing even as it caused the hair on her arms and neck to stand up and a harsh shiver to overcome her body.
She adjusted to the wind quickly as she walked down the porch stairs and out to the tree where Flynn was grazing next to Arthur's mare. She pulled out the band that help her hair in a low braid and combed her fingers through it as she clucked for Flynn to come to her.
He was untacked, with a makeshift rope halter over his head for easy leading. She guessed that Arthur must have untacked him before everyone went to bed. She snatched his reins that were laid out across his saddle on the hitching post.
Flynn walked his way over to Annabel, who clucked at him again. He swished his tail from side to side, flicking away the flies that irritated his skin. He nickered and bobbed his head up and down as she held up the bridal in one hand and the bit in the other. He took the bit without a fight and she fitted the bridal over his ears and fixing the buckles as Flynn adjusted and ground his teeth on the bit for a moment. She patted his neck, feeling a thin film of dirt on her hand as she does and started to lead him towards the path.
"Where ya goin'?" Annabel yelped and spun around with a hand on her chest.
Arthur stood not too far from her, leaning up against three tree that stood tall in front of the homestead.
"Jesus, Arthur." She let go of a sigh and slouched forward. "Don't go scaring me like that."
"Did you not see me?" he smirked from under his hat, smoking a cigarette and exhaling the smoke through his nose, "And you didn't answer my question."
"I don't know where I'm going. I was just gonna ride out and clear my mind."
"Mind if I join ya?" he took another puff of his cigarette, before throwing it on the ground and grinding it with his foot.
"I don't mind. I just –…" she watched as he took the reins from the hitching post and put it on his mare. "I need to be away from all of this."
"Too much for ya?" there was humor mixed in his concerned question. Annabel gave him a weak smile, even if it was forced.
"They all know you, and they tried to get to know me and well… I'm not good with people. I mean I used to be a social butterfly in college, but after my second year I only focused on my studies.
"It's okay. They like ya, so you don't have to worry too much." He fixed the bridal onto his mare, her dapple gray coat shining under the moonlight. Annabel huffed at his comment and jumped on her horse, belly first before throwing her leg over.
"You don't have to come with me." She gave him a somber look, hoping that he would let her go alone.
"The company wouldn't hurt, especially since I doubt you know your way around these parts."
"Yeah I guess you're right." She pushed Flynn into a canter, with Arthur riding not to far behind her.
Her hair fluttered in the wind, long curls dancing and waving around behind her. The sound of rushing wind and Flynn's hooves on dry dirt filled her ears. The rush of cold air made her shiver, and she cursed herself for not bringing her jacket.
She started to reminisce to the time when she got Flynn, the little colt with an attitude. Her father got him as a graduation present eight years ago. She remembered the intense training that she went through and did with the colt, who was as stubborn as a mule. She remembered her father's encouragements with her training when he bucked her off the first time. His wise words and soothing tone helped her train the stubborn colt to actually work with her.
Annabel started to tear up from the memories that played so vividly in her mind. The cold air started to make everything tingle and soon enough she couldn't take the painful bubbling in her chest and the burning in her stomach.
She spurred her horse into a gallop right when Arthur called out to her. Flynn, being the thoroughbred he was, instantly pick up his pace, bucking his back legs a little in excitement and leaving a large dust trail behind them.
Arthur called for her again, spurring his own horse to follow but she kept pushing him, not paying attention to Arthur's worried calls and his mares' loud nickers and hooves. She split off the path, not caring on the destination and hoping that soon enough she'll be in a place where she could scream and let out her emotions.
She continued to push Flynn, letting her tears slip out and push past her temples due to the wind. Her sobs cracked through the air, and Arthur's pleas fading in the distance.
She leaned back, pulling on the reins harshly and suddenly, Flynn's' back legs tucking under him as he comes to a skidding stop. She dismounted quickly, running over to the cliffs edge right when Arthur rode up at a trot, anger and concern washing over his face.
"Annabel, what the hell –!" his words were cut off by her screams, and he watched as she threw her head back and letting out all the stress and pain she's been holding onto for the last couple months. In those screams, he knew she needed this.
She needed to let it all out.
She stopped after a few minutes, bending over herself completely breathless and sweaty and teary eyed. She heaved air into her lungs, praying that no one else heard her cries other than Arthur and even then she wished she was alone.
Annabel stood up straight after a moment and looked up at the moon, the bright blue light shining down and casting shadows across the ground below.
She lets go of a deep sigh and sits down on the edge of the cliff, letting her feet swing and dangle. "I thought you were better at riding, Arthur." She mocked lightly, starting to feel too tired for anything.
"You can't just go runnin' off like that." She laughed, throwing her head back to look at him.
"I feel like that's an excuse."
"It's not." He grumbles, looking at her as he flicks a match on the bottom of his boot to light another cigarette. She was trying to manage her loose curls and small strands that stuck to her forehead.
Silence fell over them as he sat down next to her, taking long puffs of his cigarette and knocking the ash over the edge. He caught her looking up at the stars, with one eye closed and a finger drawing lines from point to point. He noticed her eyes were still puffy and red, but he also noticed the small gold flecks near your pupil under the harsh blue moon. Tear streaks stained her cheeks and her temples and as a soft breeze blew past them and her hair fluttered in the wind, he noticed that scar that laid on the right side of her neck, an inch away from her throat.
The wind changed directions and came from behind them, moving her hair from over her shoulders and covering her face. She let out a small laugh, trying to tuck her hair behind her ears while the wind still rushed past them.
He reaches out; not sure of what he was doing or why he was doing it, and tucks a stray strand behind her ear. "You should wear your hair like that more often." Her laughter is light, but the look in her eyes holds nothing but exhaustion.
"Why?" his hand lingers longer than he meant, and he curses himself for it. She starts to pull her hair over her shoulder, combing her fingers through and getting ready to braid it back up.
"You look nice." His statement brings a blush onto her cheeks, and she hopes that it's too dark to see it. "I don't think I've ever seen you with it down in the years we've known each other." He continues to look at her, and he admires the way strands stick to her face still, the length of her lashes as they fluttered over her eyes, and the way her lips part slightly as trees rustle in the background.
"You know I keep it up because if I don't, it gets stuck on everything." Her little giggles and slight curve of her lips make his heart flutter and he can't remember the last time he felt like this.
Was it Mary, before she hurt him? Calling off the engagement because he refused to change for her. It took him too long to get over that woman, even when he was at her beck and call those few times.
He didn't really think when he leaned in, placing a small kiss on the corner of her lips. He didn't really think at all when she looked up slightly, mouth open to say something only for him to lean in again. Her lips were soft compared to his chapped ones. She didn't pull away from any of it and he took that as a sign that this was okay.
That she was okay with this.
With him.
He moved closer, wanting to deepen the kiss and hold her close but she moved away from him. She turned her head away from him and he was close enough to see her blush on her cheeks.
"Did I… Did I do something wrong." She looked over at him, face full of confusion and shock.
"No!" she covered her mouth and looked away, grazing her fingers over her lips, "No, I just wasn't expecting that. I…" she bit her lip, and a part of her unsure what to say.
So she didn't say anything.
She jumped up too fast, almost causing her to fall back down, and walked back to Flynn who was grazing on a berry bush by the tree.
"Anna?" she waved him off, started mumbling to herself about how crazy she way. "Anna, wait. Please."
"Arthur, I –…" she huffs and groans, leaning her head on her horses shoulder. "There's too much going on, there's no way I can do –" She circled her arms around, gesturing to them both, "– this."
"Well, don't just walk away from me like that."
"Oh what am I supposed to do, lay down and take it?"
"What? No! I –."
"I can't be in a relationship right now. Not when I have things I need to take care of. Not when I have myself to take care of."
"I get it, I'm sorry." He reaches out for her, but she pulls away from his touch.
"I'm sorry too… God, Arthur. I want to but after everything that has happened I just… can't. Not yet…"
"Annabel…"
"Don't… Just, please."
He watched as she jumped on her horse and rode off back to Beecher's hope without him.
Her ride back to the homestead was somber and lonesome, and a part of her wanted to go back to him just to tell him that she wants to do this, that she wants to try.
But even she knew they wouldn't work. Not right now.
Not yet.
The ride was long and boring and filled with too many thoughts of that kiss. That god forsaken kiss that shouldn't have happened.
Or should have happened, but at a later date.
"God dammit… dammit… dammit… dammit…" she let her horse ride at a canter, hoping that she didn't hurt Arthur too much.
"I'm a damn idiot…"
I really hope that this was okay. I feel like Arthur was way too out of character and I am still trying my best to get stuff out of the way and make the plot move. I'm excited for the next chapter, because I have the dumbest(?) idea ever and I love it.
Thank you guys for all of the love! I really appreciate it!