Sakura was not sure what to think when her sister announced that she would join their training session that morning. Training with Suzu was vastly different from training with Kakashi-sensei. Knowing her sister's short temper and stubbornness, Suzu would do nothing but fight with sensei.
A part of Sakura wanted to see it. If anyone could best Sensei, it was another jounin. People called sensei, Kakashi of a Thousand-Jutsu, the copy-nin. Sakura didn't know why, but she suspected it had to do with the what hid beneath his mask and hitai-ate.
Suzu had her own nicknames. Names that sunk like stones in a well.
Another part of Sakura wanted to be the one to do it.
She read the journals of Uzumaki Mito, the Slug Princess Tsunade, and Kiyoshi the Unbroken from Iwa.
Sakura wanted to be like that, a name so feared that people hesitated to even whisper it. She knew that she was strong. Her mind was sharp and clear and made it easy to pick things up.
But, to Kakashi, to shinobi in general, Sakura had no name backing her up. Haruno was not a clan name and would die out with the two of them.
If Sakura wanted respect, she would have to take it herself.
When they arrived at the training field, a fine layer of mist covered the ground. The cool air and early morning sun hinted at the warm summer on the horizon. Suzu set out a thick blanket on the ground, picnic basket full of food placed on the corner.
Sakura did her stretches as Suzu walked around the perimeter of the field, hands bushing against rough bark of the trees.
In the lonely days of her childhood, when Ino was the only friend, she had known, and Suzu still lost in the madness of her mind, Sakura had watched her sister do the same thing. Runes, seals not known to any minds in this world, painted upon walls and windows.
Her mother had been the only one to edge Suzu back into the world. Now, it more an old habit to secure their surroundings than a serious attempt.
"Laps?" Sakura asked, bending over backwards. It was hard to believe that anyone enjoyed running. If she wasn't being chased, there was no point in the activity. Some, like Suzu and the Green-Beast that stalked Konoha, had lost whatever sense they had long ago.
"We can race. First to twenty laps wins," Suzu said, stretching her arm over her chest.
"That's not fair."
"It wouldn't be fair if I sat and watched. I'm doing the laps too. It's not my fault if you're slow."
"That's like pitting a rabbit against a fox."
"Arguing won't make you any faster."
Sakura glared but followed her sister into a crouch. She waited for her sister's signal, feeling the pleasant buzz of energy fill her body. Suzu counted. Sakura rushed off before she got to three.
Laughing at the displeased huff coming from behind her, she pushed her legs forward. For a brief few minute, Sakura held the lead but, the burning in her legs eventually caught up and Suzu whizzed past her.
Suzu ran laps like dogs chased squirrels, enthusiastically and without any form. By the time Sakura muddled her way through ten laps, Suzu finished at least twenty.
"You have to be quicker, or you'll be dead," Suzu said, passing her by.
"Or you could be clever and not get caught."
The scowl that pulled at Suzu's lips was worth the stumble as her sister shoved her aside.
Moments later, Sakura collapsed in a sweaty heap on the grass next to her, hair forming a pink halo around her head. Suzu turned to look at her, eyes tracing over her face with a faraway look. Sometimes it was as if she'd lost her anchor to this world. Sakura only hoped that she was enough to pull her back.
"Hungry?" Suzu finally asked, lifting Sakura's head into her lap. Sakura stared up at her, eyelids fluttering shut beneath the sun's rays. Suzu leaned forward a bit, letting her hair drape over Sakura's face and blocking out the sun.
They settled in a quiet peace, one that can only be shared between sisters, a silence full of things known and not-known, said and unsaid.
An hour later, when Sakura was fed and watered, Sasuke arrived, slinking into the field silently. His cool, dark eyes fell over her with an impassiveness she'd associated with the Uchiha despite not knowing many of them. The look made her feel small.
Burying the feeling deep inside where it can't claw at her pulse any longer, Sakura gestured for him to sit. The sharpness of his features and strength to his movements left her feeling awkward and lanky.
"Sasuke-kun," Suzu trilled, giddily. She smoothed out a section of the blanket and placed a bento box in front of Sasuke. There were a few brief moments of silence, where Suzu and Sasuke simply stare at one another before he picked up the carefully prepared bento box.
"What time does Kakashi-san usually come?" Suzu asked, spreading out on the blanket. She propped her head up on her hand, leaning on one elbow.
"Noon, sometimes later," Sakura said. She turned to look at Sasuke who nodded in confirmation.
The harsh look that entered Suzu's eyes made Sakura chilly all over. Kakashi-sensei made a mistake that morning, sleeping in or whatever he does. If she knew her sister well, Suzu's coiling up all her anger and annoyance with the man for when he come.
By the time Naruto arrived, stumbling in half-asleep and unkempt, Suzu worked up a temper. She never had a team of her own. ANBU members were like leaves, coming and going as the seasons went. Genin teams always seemed like a bit of a dream to her and reminded her of Hermione and Ron. Her first few months of training, during the harsh trials that eventually led to a mask and a standard tanto blade, Suzu wished desperately for someone else to be with her.
If there was one quality that Suzu shared with Harriet, it was the steadfast loyalty that runs in her veins. Konoha's teams, the sacrifice that people like Hatake Sakumo made for their friends, that was something Suzu could understand. What she can't understand was their sensei's half-assed approach to taking care of them.
It was no wonder then, that the sight of Naruto half asleep, shirt moth-bitten, and the crumbs of stale toast clinging to his mouth sent Suzu in a tizzy. She sat Naruto down next to Sasuke, shoving his bento towards it and topping it with the remaining half of her own breakfast.
"Thanks, nee-chan," he said, shoving bits of egg into his mouth. Sasuke grimaced next to him but, makes no real move to leave.
"What have you all done so far? Strength exercises? Speed Training? Kunai practice?" Suzu asked, directing her attention towards Naruto. She knew enough from Sakura but wondered if the boys felt the same about their sensei's attitude.
"No, nee-chan. We've been doing D-levels and a bit of those other things."
"What about tai-jutsu? Nin-jutsu?"
"Kakashi-sensei doesn't trust us with big jutsus but, he's wrong. I told him; I'd be the best ninja ever. I'm going to be Hokage," Naruto declared, eyes burning brightly. Suzu's heart stuttered for a moment, wondering briefly into a past memory of the Fourth Hokage.
No.
As much as Naruto was like his father and mother, he was his own person as well. She won't make the mistake to confuse him for Minato. Naruto still managed to see good in this village despite how it treated him.
"Konoha would be better off with a Hokage like you Naruto-chan," Suzu said.
"Hn," Sasuke tilted his chin upward as if he had been personally insulted. She wouldn't be surprised if he was. No Uchiha had ever been Hokage.
"Don't scoff, Sasuke-kun. The Fourth Hokage was an orphan without a clan to back him."
"Was he really? Did you know him, nee-chan?"
"You remind me of him actually, Naruto. He was a genius in every sense of the word but, sometimes he'd come up with the inanest plans that left you wondering if he was mad." This was as close as she'd ever come to telling him the truth. Another stupid rule of the Hokage's, though Suzu was allowed close enough when Naruto was a child to contemplate breaking it.
If she told him now, would he hate the demon inside him? Would it drive him mad?
"Thanks, nee-chan," Naruto whispered, softly.
"Never let anyone tell you that you're less than you are." She took Naruto's clammy hand in hers, squeezing tightly to reassure both him and her. A shift in the air behind her had her tensing. Suzu dropped Naruto's hand, sitting with a stiff spine as Kakashi crouched on the ground next to her.
"Momo-chan," he drawled, "It's a bit early to be so serious."
A burst of anger, quick and explosive filled her before she swallowed it back, leaning into the blank mask she's mastered as a kunoichi. Cold as a crisp winter day, she turned to stare at him. If he was startled by the lack of fear in her eyes, he did not show it.
"You're late," she bit out.
"I got caught up. A stray cat here, an old lady there. Time flies." Disinterest lined the arch of his shoulders, even as he reached past her, arm brushing her shoulder to grab the last of the rice balls. She caught his wrist between her fingers, squeezing tightly until his grip lessened and he the rice ball fell to the blanket.
"I don't need excuses. Training your students is usually done to ensure their survival. If you can't manage to show up on time, perhaps you should consider asking the Hokage for a reassignment."
"They've managed just fine so far. Learning a bit of independence is healthy."
Suzu took a deep breath, ignoring Kakashi and turning back to the children. How can he not take this seriously? Fingers clenching tightly in the loose fabric of her shirt, Suzu pulled away from him and the children.
"Lesson time?" Kakashi asked.
Kakashi fucked up again. It's easy to forget that his lateness wasn't appreciated by everyone. Most people put up with his bullshit because of sheer fear or pity. Kunoichi had a talent of looking past the sob story and remembering that Kakashi was once a functioning human being.
Ignoring the chastising looks thrown his way by both Sakura and Sasuke, Kakashi brought out the bells, letting them dangle between his fingers.
The boys attacked him first, Sasuke with a great show of chakra, a fire-ball worthy of an Uchiha. Naruto, like always, was brash and too reckless but enthusiastic.
Sakura does something behind his back. While he's distracted by both Naruto and Sasuke, he saw her enter his field of vision, fingers brushing against his lower back with a sudden jolt.
The world falls apart.
His limbs, once light and limber have turned to stone. His body won't listen. As he tried to lift his tongue, the weight of the movement strained all the muscles in his face. Panic rose for an instant before the feeling goes away and he stumbled forward.
Sakura, rosy cheeked and sweating, held up the bells with a proud smile.
"What was that?" Kakashi demanded, then realizing that neither of the boys were responsible, rounded on Sakura.
"Do it again," he said, watching as Sakura's face turned bright red. He could feel Suzu lingering at the edge of his vision, hovering like a bee over a flower. Sakura's face scrunched up, her hands twisting to form the seals again.
His vision warped and pulled. He tried to take a step forward and found his body frozen unable to move without gravity shifting. Even his hands refused his commands, feeling heavier the more he tried to move them. He let out a pulse of chakra which eases the effect before Sakura broke it herself.
"Where did you learn that?" he asked, breathing heavily.
"Nowhere. I read a book." Her voice, high-pitched and panicked, reminds him of how he used to reassure his father after doing something he wasn't supposed to. "Michi and the Seven Cats of Yomi. Michi snares one of the bakeneko with a charm that makes his body grow heavy like a stone. I thought that we could use a genjutsu to do the same."
"Genjutsu can't effect your physical body, it can only make you think it does."
"I know. Suzu's a master at lighting chakra, she said that some Kumo-nin use it for medical purposes. I thought if we combine the effects, we can trick the body into believing the genjutsu too."
"How old were you? When you did this?"
"Eight but, I didn't perfect it until later." He looked at her again, seeing the pieces fall into place. Raised by a genius, a girl who was placed in ANBU right out of the academy, who was a pawn of Danzō and anyone else with the slightest bit of power. What would someone like that do to stop the same thing from happening to her own family?
He turned to look at Suzu, the worried lines around her eyes, the clenched fist at her side.
"Enough," Suzu called, meeting his gaze evenly. A noise like lightning striking stone erupted and the next moment she was in front of him. Kakashi jumped backward as her hand comes out to strike him. For a couple of moments, she played with him, hands brushing his shirt, legs just missing him.
When she grew bored of the evasiveness, a sharpness entered her gaze putting him on the edge. The next tangle of limbs has his elbow caught in her grip, her leg forcing his from the ground. A twist threw him on the ground, back hitting the dirt with a dull thud. His elbow grew cool and numb, too heavy from him to lift.
Gritting his teeth against whatever she's done, he pushed himself into a crouch.
"Lion," Kakashi said, recognizing the fluidity in her movements.
He'd fought with her before, and it had never been pretty. Suzu smiled grimly, all teeth, stretched and taunt. Cold dripped down his spine, the realization striking him with sudden clarity. For all the bloodline strengths that Sasuke and Naruto were granted, Sakura had the distinct advantage of living with a legend of ANBU. Whatever natural power the boys held, would be matched in sheer will-power and brains.
"I haven't been that for a while."
"It doesn't go away."
His hand twitched at his side, desperate to pull away his hitai-ate and unleash the sharingan. He's seen enough of Lion's skills in the field to know that they are unevenly matched without the mirror-eye.
As if she's aware of his thoughts, her body relaxed, arms loosening like willow branches in the wind. Kakashi did not follow suit, every part of him brimmed with stinging awareness.
"Relax," she said. In ANBU, she had been forgettable. Brown eyes, dark hard, slim, and hard. A face easily hidden among thousands of others. It was her mask that made her memorable. With the mask, she was the quickest kill in all ANBU.
"That's a bit hard to do at the moment."
"An angry ninja is a dead one."
"I'm not angry," he snapped back.
"Good. The bells were the Fourth's test. It's works best when there's an established team dynamic."
"It's training technique to develop team dynamics."
"Says the only living member of his team." He flinched away from the words, surprised at the coldness of her tone. Like all their past interactions, bitterness and a lack of tact lend a sharp edge to their words. Kakashi, unused to the lack of control he felt, backed off.
"I'll end the exercise here then. Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura, get your things, you're dismissed for the afternoon. Meet back here tomorrow at noon."
A tense silence grew as the children pack their things. Suzu won't meet his gaze and for once he doesn't mind. There's something about the cool green that struck him numb.
Once they're far enough away, he sighed letting some of his tension fade away. Making his way over to Suzu, he held a handout to her, pulling her up from the ground. Pink strands fall from her face, pushed through the air by the soft breeze.
He will not admit that she's pretty, in the way that women are when they are unafraid and young. She reminded him of a newly sprung leaf in spring, bursting with a quite energy and hinting at future warmth.
He guided her towards the Memorial Stone. There were no apologies to be traded between them anymore. He understood her fears better than he had before today.
Suzu looked at the worn stone, the names carved into the face of it. Most of them were blank, empty faces, people who had died like whispers in the dark.
"Sometimes it's hard to come here," Kakashi admitted. The sound of his voice cracked the fragile silence they had built. Suzu was certain that he hadn't meant for her to hear. She knew the rumors—facts when they come from a shinobi's mouth.
Kakashi was a man wracked with guilt and forced to deal with loss after loss. Everyone's seen him here at one point or another, speaking for hours on end or paying a silent vigil for his fallen friend.
She wondered if he'd loved them.
She didn't ask or voice the thoughts that were on the tip of her tongue. Whatever help he needed, she couldn't give. Though she remembered working with him in ANBU, he's still a stranger to her. There was no use telling him to go to therapy when such a thing didn't exist in this world.
Despite the Yamanaka's consent urging for psychological evaluations and mandated therapy, they were all just bodies to the Hokage. Kakashi was part of an era that saw ninja as the Hokage's weapons and no more. A couple of words from her wouldn't change that.
It was moments like this, looking at the trauma of another shinobi that reminded Suzu of how not normal this world was. Even Sakura, who Suzu never hide anything from, did not understand that their world was a broken one built on decades of violence.
Though, she too was bitter and ruined from this world, Suzu was like a scar, pink gnarled skin that has knotted over some great wound. Stronger for having survived, but never quite the same.
"It should be. If it was easy, then everything they died for meant nothing." She felt more than saw Kakashi's gaze. The few times she had been on missions with him in ANBU, she caught a rare glimpse of his sharingan, the red spinning in relentless circles.
Now, with the ANBU porcelain gone from his face, she could see the edge of a scar underneath his hitai-ate. His mask covered the rest and Suzu wasn't inclined to catch a peek. In the academy, she'd heard a rumor that he had worn it because he looked like his father. Now, Suzu wondered how true that is.
"How old was Sakura?" Kakashi asked, shoulders brushing against her own. Suzu looks up, watching the quiet stillness of his face. This was a real mask, she thought. Turning back, she found the name that he's looking at. Obito Uchiha. The world they live in was cruel. For Kakashi, doubly so.
"Seven," Suzu answered. Kakashi's breathing stopped for a quick moment, the rise and fall of his chest halted. She wondered how old he had been.
"She was all alone." Horror lingered at the edge of Kakashi's words.
"I was on a mission," Suzu said, her voice low, barely heard over the wind. "When I came back, I smelled the blood from down the street."
"And Sakura?"
"No one should have to watch their parent's die, Kakashi. Not that young," her voice seized in her throat. Memories of her mother rose behind her burning eyes. Kakashi turned away from the stone, staring down at her with a heavy gaze.
"You were right, I treated her wrongly because of my own biases. I won't make that mistake again." His voice was steady and stately, as if he were some lost noble pledging his fealty to a daimyo.
"You probably will. It's hard to let go of all the privilege you've had. You were born to a clan and the world told you that you were better because of it."
"I'll try then," he conceded.
"That's all I can ask for I suppose."
She turned away from Kakashi, leaving him to his stone and mourning. She cannot help but think of the ghosts that lingered in the Great Hall long after their deaths.
In the mist and fog, hidden beneath the cool shade of Hashirama's trees, Kakashi looked more ghost than man.