In the office of the District Attorney, Henry Mecham was at his desk writing his next case to indict Warren White for embezzling millions from the Gotham Stock Exchange. "Mr. Mecham, would you like something to drink?", his assistant asked. "No thank you. Michelle come here, I need your thoughts on this." Henry takes out the billboard showing a picture of Warren in the center with red threads connecting him to different documents and newspaper highlights.

"Sure," seeing the board she wondered if he solely made it himself. It resembled what many would see on crime shows and psychological thrillers. "Was this made entirely from you?"

"No, some of the officers at the GCPD gave their insight to the case. This man has set a claim for insanity. I personally don't believe it, a man knowing he's going to be in jail for the next couple decades without possibility of parole thinks pleading being a nut will get him off easy."

"But sir, if he's successful in pleading insanity wouldn't he be transferred for 'treatment' at Arkham Asylum?"

"Yes and a person like him will quickly discover that federal prison is more hospitable." The assistant took a piece of paper and wrote 'gangs' on it. She placed the paper on the board and stuck a thumb tack carrying a string to the center.

"Gangs? You think some of the super criminals are affiliated with Mr. White? He thinks less of those freaks than average citizens. And what he says is less than appealing."

"Yes, that's the perfect cover for him though. 'Why would he associate with people he despises.'"

"He could have helped launder money as well as embezzle from others. This means there's potential to arrest these villains if this conspiracy ends up being true, 'RICO'. Tomorrow I'll look into this further and ask a couple favors with the mayor's office. Get some rest soon Michelle, the next couple of days will feel like hell." Michelle noticed that the clock hit 11:17 p.m.

"See you tomorrow Mr. Mecham."

"Goodbye Michelle."

Henry walked down the floor and entered the elevator to go to the garage. Driving to his apartment he felt ready to get to his bed. A buzz came on his phone. It was from Susan, she was in Bludhaven working with their D.A. on the trial against the huntress with intervention from Nightwing. He personally missed her. When he worked with her he sensed a connection and was sure it had become mutual. He was looking forward to seeing her in a couple months.

Entering his home he noticed the lights were turned off but could hear the sink running. Walking to turn it off he then heard the living room television blaring the news. His nerves weren't shocked, but he was making sure to be alert. "Did you ever consider what your intentions lead to?"

"Who...SMASH" Henry fell to the floor. Joker appeared from the darkness behind him. He turned off the television and drag Henry out of his apartment.

….."Mistah J, are you sure that Batman didn't follow you?"

"Of course love, I've been playing cat and mouse with batsy for years. After we're done here the bat will probably begin his recon search for our dear district attorney. He already failed saving the last one, he won't make the same mistake twice."

"I must congratulate you on the suit puddin. It works perfectly, it definitely represents your sapid taste sweetie."

"It contains your true beauty and I'll be tearing you out of that when we get to bed after this, I bought some whip cream earlier."

"Okaay guys can you finish this up so you can start your game of intimidation." Henry apparently was awake during their little conversation. "Did you know Harvey Henry? How did it feel inheriting the mess he left behind?"

"It was hell the first couple months. I had assistance and input from smart people. I knew regaining the trust of Gotham's citizens would take great effort and hell, I'm still making the effort. And the best way to reinstate that trust is sending freaks and monsters like you to the same place I send the rest of our criminal scu…" Jay wrapped a wire around his neck. The sound of henry choking was music to his ears. Harley was giggling to the pleased look on her puddin's face. "Now listen and listen fucking well. You will be in court voting on the 'chaos law' in a couple of weeks with the mayor, delegates and state representatives. The rest of those imbeciles have been persuaded to turn against this foolish bill because this is an all in or out scenario, the last chess piece to topple is you, Gotham's fresh white knight. So will you vote against the bill or not?" He loosened the wire around his neck. Gasping for air Henry screamed, "Fuck you!" Joker snickered. "Ah Henry, is that any way talk when there's a lady in the room?"

"She's doesn't seem like a lady Joker. Especially if she's crazy enough to be with fuck up like you!"

"Harley dear, do you mind passing me my knife?"

"Sure baby, anything for you." Giving her his five inch blade, platinum trim with rubber grip. It was gray with a purple outline, a piece of him he could travel with. "It's funny, I had a job as a butchers apprentice over one summer. The man was nice, taught me well, a real example of a father figure. He believed in precision, quality over quantity, and with beef marking at 6.57 a pound, there had to be more meat than fat. I spent so much time trimming the fat, I believe that's where my patience spawned." Jay traced the blade over his skin. Henry didn't say anything yet, the blade had not break the skin.

"Is this father figure of yours one who had sadistic tendencies?"

"No. I knew how to hide who I really was. Those I'd care for I pushed away and some benefitted."

"And the rest died I'm guessing?"

"Yes, but they didn't deserve it." He pressed the knife into his right arm. His screaming filled the room neither Harley or Jack weren't phased. Taking out the knife Jack pressed it against Henry's skin and began trimming off the top epidermis. "Will you reconsider or will I have to continue this down to your lower body?"

"Alright! Alright! I'll vote against the bill just stop you crazy fuck!"

"Good boy." He closed the bloody knife and placed it in his pocket. "This bill couldn't work out even with the best of intentions. Stupid politicians. Oh and because I think more than just your word is required, we'll be keeping an eye on Susan until the bill is denied. If you mention any of this to her or too anybody, I'll have Victor Freeze turn that flame of yours into an icicle. I have eyes and ears everywhere Henry. Don't fuck with us. Batman can't be in two places at once. If one falls it will be either you or her so tread likely for a bit. This will all be over….eventually."

"You son of a bi...SMASH" Henry was again knocked out from Joker's hard fist. "Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. Remember that love."

"I will Mistah J." They held hands while walking out the building. Jay made a phone call directing his men to take Henry back to his home. "You did good sweets." Harley canonize him and she knew the feelings mutual. "Thank you puddin, I love watching you work."

"Eventually I'll have to teach you the ways of knife cutting. You wouldn't think it's complicated to cut things but focus is key as well as speed."

"Hey Mistah J, what you said about the apprenticeship, was it false?"

"Some of it yeah but the patience was real. God I cut so much meat. It's one of the reasons why I stick with having my meat already trimmed and packaged."

"Wanna get a burger, I'm kind of hungry right now." Jay looked at her. "Really, it's 2:38 in the morning."

"So McDonalds?"

"Well fine I guess, are you sure, I can make some alfredo at home."

"Please puddin, I'll share my fries with you."

"Oh so enticing, and the ketchup that comes with the bag? Hehe the last time I ate a burger I looked under the bun and I yelled 'where's the pickles!' Both chuckled for a couple minutes. A phone call was made placing an order for one of his goons to get their food.

At Harley's townhouse…

The shades were pulled down, lights were dimmed, tv was turned off, clock was ticking, the home was filled with a Febreze scent. Jack pulled out a record to play on Harley's Bluetooth LP. Flipping the switch, the mechanical arm slowly moved to the edge of the vinyl. Spinning at 33 RPM the first sound they heard was a piano. A knock came from the door, it was the goon. "Billy thank you so much for getting us this. Here's some cash for your troubles." He handed him a couple hundreds. "Thank you so much sir."

"You have a good night son."

"Goodnight sir." Jay closed the door and walked towards the dining room. He opened the bag with the golden arches. In the bag he pulled out two Big Mac's, one large fry, ten ketchup packets, and three napkins. "Nothing like cholesterol for less than ten dollars."

"Yes but you have to admit it's tasty though." Joker raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, if your under the influence." He handed her the burger and fries. Jay pulled out a chair for her. "Thanks puddin." Jay grabbed a bottle of beer and chugged it. "These two work hand in hand, the only reason why I get beer really."

"Speaking of hand in hand." She zoomed out of her chair and headed to the kitchen. A minute later she returned with a Costco size tub of Hellman's mayonnaise and a spoon. "Let's have something different."

"But Mayonnaise, Really?"

"Oh yeah. It's salty with a hint of tang, very delicious." She scooped up some mayonnaise and plopped it on the Big Mac wrapping paper. Scraping two fries together against the condiment, she got closer to Jay. "Please, try it, you'll enjoy it." Slowly his mouth opened and her fingers went in to place the fries on his tongue. Joker's mouth closed trapping her soft fingers. She felt his tongue travel in between them. She smiled at him and he pulled his head back. "Grease and salt, pretty good."

"Ketchup is nice but I've grown to enjoy the mayonnaise more."

"I understand sweets, we tend to stick with what we're used to. Sometimes we have to try things we find odd and unusual."

"Yes Mistah J." Hearing a change in tune from the LP, the beat speed up and the desire to dance was in the air. Joker stood up from his chair. "Care for a dance sweets?"

"I'd love that Jay."