===== December 23, 2022 - Floor 4: Palu Outpost, Necluda Wasteland =====
Link made his way to the tavern where he had seen Reychelle go upon their arrival at the small outpost a few hours ago. Unfortunately, she was no longer there, nor was anyone else. What was there was evidence that a massive brawl had taken place.
Tables were splintered, chairs were overturned, food and drink covered the walls... naturally he had no way to prove it, but he had a sinking feeling Reychelle had something to do with it. That feeling was confirmed when he described her to the bartender.
"Yeah, she was here, sitting back in the corner by herself drinking," the barman explained. "That was, until some fellows dressed all in red showed up. She ignored them at first, but one of them went over to talk to her, and... didn't take much to set her off. She walloped the first one, then the rest tried to come to his aid. Naturally, everyone else in the place didn't take too kindly to six guys trying to beat up one girl." He gestured to the walls as if to demonstrate the result.
"I see... thank you for your help. But, before I leave..."
"That was fast... did you find her?" Zelda asked as Link reentered their room.
"I did not. She touched off a bar brawl, but where she went after that, I have no idea."
"Oh..."
"I did find something at that tavern, though." He grabbed two cups from the cabinet and poured both of them halfway full from a bottle in his inventory. "Cheers," he said while handing her a cup.
"Cheers, I guess..." She took her cup, sniffed it, and Link could see her eyes bulging even in the complete darkness. "This is..."
"Kiwi told me how much you enjoyed it, so I figured I'd get some for us to share. Just don't go overboard, is all I ask... we have a lot of ground to cover tomorrow and you can't afford to be hung over."
"Oh come on... you can't tell me you've never dreamed of getting me drunk and taking advantage of me," she purred.
"Woman, you are wild enough when sober... I don't think I'd ever have to actually do that."
"That's right, and don't you forget it."
They spent the rest of the night enjoying the plum wine, and each other. As a result, they didn't leave the inn until almost noon, seeing a very familiar, very bitter, and very hungover person outside.
"Reychelle, it's you... are you doing all right?" Link asked.
"I'm... alive. That's about all I got goin' for me right now," she groaned.
"I see... listen, about the other day-"
"You're a real dick, you know that?"
"...Yeah, I kinda was. And I'm sorry for that."
"...Whatever."
Link sighed, then shrugged. "Guess I had that coming... listen, whatev-"
"Link? Is that you?"
Link turned in the direction of the new voice, then facepalmed. "You gotta be kidding me... Klein?"
"Aww... why you gotta be like that, buddy?"
"Long couple of days, let's say... anyway, what are you doing here?"
"Trying to survive this floor, same as you. But..." He nodded in Reychelle's direction as he continued, "it seems to have its own dangers."
"Dude, lay off her. She's been through a lot."
"That doesn't mean she had to try to cut my head off!"
"Cut your- wait a second..." Six guys, all dressed in red... "The tavern brawl last night... that was you?"
"Oh, you heard about that, huh?"
Now it was Zelda's turn to facepalm. "I feel like I should be surprised, and yet."
Klein merely chuckled as he turned his attention to Zelda. "So we fought this badass monster not too far from here, and it dropped a weapon that none of us have any real use for. I thought that with your fighting style, maybe you could use it? Otherwise, we're just gonna sell it for cash."
"I'll take a look at it," Zelda replied, and Klein pulled the item in question from his inventory. It was a two-handed club made of heavy stone, about five feet in total length and very heavy. She took a few swings with it before handing it back. "Sorry, it feels a little too heavy for me, but thank you."
"Can I... can I see that?" Link, Zelda and Klein looked down to see Reychelle strangely fixated on the weapon. Klein gave her a strange look but pushed the handle towards her just the same. She took it, and immediately fell to her knees weeping.
"Zelda, what is that thing?" Link whispered.
"It's called a Lynel Crusher, why?"
Link gasped, as it immediately clicked why Reychelle was so drawn to it. "Do you... think I could... keep this?" she asked, her voice quivering.
"Sure, I don't mind... but only if you have dinner with m-" Klein was cut off by Zelda knocking him clean into the dirt. "Insensitive jerk," she huffed.
"No, it's fine," Reychelle said, picking herself up and stashing the weapon in her own inventory. "I'd be glad to have dinner with you," she said as she helped Klein to his feet.
Link and Zelda gave each other a what-the-fuck look before exiting the far gate without a word, where the Bosh Kala shrine awaited them. As far as they were concerned, Klein and Reychelle were officially now each other's problem.
===== Bosh Kala Shrine: The Wind Guides You =====
The two heroes found themselves in an open room with a set of stairs to their left, which led to a giant fan blowing across the room to a platform with a treasure chest.
"Hmm... what are you thinking, Princess?"
"The wind guides you... I'm thinking... I got it!" Zelda jogged up the steps, lined up with the fan and jumped off with a running start. She opened her hands above her head and her Paraglider deployed flawlessly, allowing her to ride the current to the chest holding the Timeless Princess' Gown. She hopped down to where Link was waiting for her with another forehead kiss before moving on to the next section of the shrine. Here they were confronted with another fan to the left, except this time it was blowing straight ahead across an abyss, which was no problem for their Paragliders. They climbed another short set of steps to a third and final fan, which was blowing straight to the exit platform. However, when they got there they noticed a platform with another treasure chest embedded in the far wall. It took them each several attempts, but Link finally was able to glide across the room and get to the chest. He opened it and found an Iron Sledgehammer, which he realized right away would come in handy to smash the ore deposits they had come across. He made his way back to the exit platform where Zelda was waiting for him, claimed the shrine's Spirit Orb, and warped them back to the surface.
They had burned through the Bosh Kala Shrine fairly quickly, so it was still midday when they got back to Palu. Link checked his map and noted that they were in the far northwestern reaches of the floor. "We should spend today moving east... hopefully we'll find something else out here other than just wasteland. And I know you're not going to like me saying this, but we really should bring our other party member along with us."
"Other party member? Oh, you mean Kiwi! Why would I not like that?"
"Because I know how much you're enjoying having me to yourself."
"Of course I am, but she's still a member of our party."
Link said nothing, just eyed Zelda suspiciously as he used the Sheikah Slate to warp them both back to Kakariko Village. When they materialized, however, they saw Kiwi on the pedestal as well, looking extremely lost and confused. "Huh? What happened? Where am I?" She finally noticed Link and Zelda standing there somewhat confused as well. "Oh, Master, Mistress, it's you... I was really confused there for a second, but now it makes sense."
"What makes sense, how?" Link asked.
"When you teleport using the Sheikah Slate, your entire party gets transported with you... did Aunt Purah not explain that to you?"
Link thought back to two nights ago, when he had in fact warped the entire party back to Kakariko Village before he and Zelda used crystals to get back to the Town of Beginnings. "She did in fact not. But you're right, that does make total sense." The group stopped briefly at Impa's house to honor the Sheikah elder before instantly traveling back to Palu Outpost.
Link realized if they were going to be a party of three, he would much rather have Kiwi along than anyone else. He had long since given up trying to figure out exactly what she was as it related to the system itself. Instead, he simply called her a worthy traveling companion, warrior and friend. Zelda had never even bothered with such concerns, so despite nagging instincts that there might be some romantic tension between Kiwi and Link, she simply brushed it aside and enjoyed the presence of a girl she truly felt was the little sister she never had.
They hunted, mined (thanks to the Iron Sledgehammer they found being able to smash the ore deposits they came across) and gathered (thanks to Kiwi spotting various critters that could actually be gathered for whatever unknown reason) their way west across the rocky wastes, arriving at another small outpost around sunset. There was no inn, but there was the Soh Kofi Shrine they could use as a teleportation point, so they agreed to go back to Kakariko for the night after defeating the trial inside and resume their travels in the morning. Zelda briefly mentioned that they should look into buying a house of their own eventually, as opposed to spending so much cash at inns every night, but that was largely a discussion put aside for another time. The group ate dinner at Impa's house with Kiwi and her family before retiring for the night. Once at the inn, Link took his shower first as he usually did.
When Zelda came out from hers, however, he was gone.
She tried calling out to him a couple times, looking around the room in any place he could be hiding, but he was simply not there.
She got dressed and ran out into the village to try and find him, but still had no luck. She tried to recruit Paya and Kiwi, who agreed to help but clearly had no idea how. They eventually gave up and brought Zelda in for a drink to calm her down - although they refused to let her get drunk, despite her clamoring.
Meanwhile, Link had actually used a crystal to teleport to Necluda City. He couldn't use the Shiekah Slate to teleport to the nearby shrine, because that would have brought both Zelda and Kiwi with him, and this was something he had to do apart from either of them.
He walked the streets looking for a particular shop he had seen before, and although it took him a decent amount of time, he eventually found it. He walked in and saw the items he had been checking out before still for sale, except now he had the materials to purchase them thanks to the party's trek through Floor 4. He placed his orders and went to the library to wait for them to be finished. He went straight for his favorite read, Mythology of the Triforce, and drank some tea while he read.
He returned to the section about the Hero of Time and briefly reread the chapter about the Deku Tree and Kokiri Emerald before moving on. The next step in the hero's quest had been to obtain two more Spiritual Stones; a ruby held by a mountain tribe of humanoids called Gorons, and a sapphire owned by the river-dwelling Zoras. The Gorons lived in an underground city carved into a mountain, which resonated with Link and what he had seen so far on the fourth floor. There were no signs of life - not counting monsters - above ground, so the existence of a subterranean settlement made sense and was at least worth investigating.
He passed his time reading until it was almost midnight, then went back to the shop he had placed his orders at to pick them up. He stopped at the local blacksmith as well before teleporting back to Kakariko Village. He went back to the inn, but found the room empty so he took a guess and went to Impa's house. There he saw three moderately intoxicated, extremely angry women who stared daggers at him the moment he walked through the door.
"Where have you been?" Zelda screamed at him, coloring her question with profanities in several different languages. Link said nothing, merely sitting down on the floor next to her.
"Did you forget what day it is?" he asked with a small smile, taking a bag out of his inventory and dumping it out next to him. In the bag were three boxes, one long rectangle and two small cubes. He gave the rectangle to Zelda and one cube each to Paya and Kiwi.
Zelda said nothing until she looked at the box in her hands. It was carefully wrapped, almost... like...
She covered her mouth as she gasped; how could she have forgotten it was Christmas Eve?!
"Go ahead, open them," Link said. Kiwi had already ripped the paper off of her gift, and opened the box to find a pair of stunning ruby pendant earrings. "Are these really for me?" she squealed.
"Of course. Merry Chri-"
"THANK YOU!" Kiwi flew across the floor and practically tackled Link in a hug.
Paya laughed softly as she gently opened her own present, a pair of sapphire stud earrings. "Thank you, Master Link... these are very nice."
"You're welcome... I'm glad you like them." She and Kiwi helped each other put their jewelry in, once Paya was able to pry her sister off of Link.
Zelda was still holding hers and fighting back tears. "I'm sorry... I totally forgot, and I didn't bother to get you anything."
"So? Open it."
"Can I at least save it for tomorrow?"
"No... I got you something else to open on Christmas."
Now she felt even more guilty, but she slowly unwrapped her present anyway. She opened the box, and her eyes almost burst out of her head, for inside was a glittering necklace. "Are those... what I think they are?"
"Mmm-hmm." Link took the necklace and clipped it around his wife's neck. "Had it made from one of the diamonds we mined today."
"Oh my god... it is absolutely beautiful." She could no longer hold back the tears of joy she had been fighting since he handed her the gift. "Thank you, Link... I love you so much!" she exclaimed as she wrapped her arms around him.
"I love you too, sweetheart."
Zelda practically dragged Link back to the inn, where she spent the next three hours showing him exactly how appreciative she was of the gift he had given her. She tried to sleep afterwards, but was still racking her brain trying to come up with an idea for a gift for him. Finally she got dressed and quietly slipped out - not quite quietly enough, since Link woke up and realized she had left, but ultimately decided to pay her no mind - and went back to Kiwi's house.
Kiwi woke up to being violently shaken out of her sleep. She looked up and saw Zelda's face hovering perilously close to her own. "Mmm... Mistress? What is it?" she asked groggily.
"Get up and get dressed, we're going to Necluda. I need your help to pick out a present for Link."
"Ugh, fine..." She equipped her bodysuit and stumbled downstairs and outside. She went around the side of the house, where a waterfall led to a small pond. She slipped and fell in, but emerged refreshed and awake. "Ah, that's much better!" she said as she equipped the rest of her armor. "Now, run everything by me again?"
Zelda facepalmed. "I need you to come with me to Necluda to help me pick out a Christmas gift for Link."
Kiwi grinned wickedly. "Ah, so you felt guilty about not getting him anything after he got you that diamond necklace? Don't worry, I'll help you... for a price."
Zelda narrowed her eyes. "What 'price' would that be?"
"Let's just say, you owe me one."
"...You're a real pain in my ass, you know that?" She shoved a teleport crystal into Kiwi's hands.
"Little sisters usually are," Kiwi replied sarcastically. "Teleport: Necluda City."
Zelda grimaced as she teleported herself moments later.
Despite it being after midnight, Necluda City was just as lively as it was during the day. Kiwi and Zelda went back to the tavern to plan, although Kiwi was extremely careful to limit Zelda's alcohol intake.
"So what did you have in mind, Mistress?"
"Hmm... I don't have much in the way of ideas."
"Well, are you thinking of something he can use every day, or something that would be kept aside for sentiment?"
"Both would be ideal."
"I see... in that case, maybe we should go with two different gifts."
"You think so?"
"Yup... and as it happens, I know exactly where we can find them."
Kiwi led Zelda through the city, first to a blacksmith where they placed one order, then to a particular jeweler. Had this been a real shop, he would have recognized his work immediately, being that both ladies were wearing the gifts Link gave them earlier. They placed an order there, then decided to sleep at the library while they waited for both gifts to be completed.
The shops finished their crafts shortly before sunrise, and Zelda and Kiwi rode on horseback to Kakariko Village. Zelda snuck back into the inn as quietly as she could, saw Link laying in bed, got undressed and s-l-o-w-l-y got under the covers -
"Welcome back."
Zelda jumped a bit as she looked into Link's eyes, which were shining green and wide open. "Umm... good morning, you were sleeping so soundly and I didn't want to wake you, so I went and had breakfast with Kiwi."
Link cocked an eyebrow. "Really? That didn't even make sense in your head, and you know it."
"Ugh, you're right," Zelda pouted. "I just really, really wanted to get you something for Christmas."
"I figured as much," he said with a smile. "Do I have to wait for it?"
"No, you can have it now." She handed him a small package, which he carefully opened. It was a gold and emerald broach, in the shape of the Triforce mark. "It's to pin on your tunic... do you like it?"
"I love it... it's absolutely beautiful. Thank you." He gave her a tight hug and a deep kiss before going through his inventory. "Remember how I told you I had something for you to open today?"
"Yes..."
"Well... here you go." He produced another package that was so big, there was only one thing in Zelda's mind it could possibly be. She shredded the wrapping to find a sword that was longer than she was tall, with a wide purple body and a cutting edge that gleamed in the dim light. "This blade... it can't be... is it?"
"Diamond, the hardest and strongest cutting material there is."
She opened the tooltip on her new weapon, called 'Darkviolence.' The damage stats were decent but nothing to write home about, but it had defensive attributes similar to a shield and out-of-this-world durability, presumably due to the diamonds used to forge it. "I absolutely love it... can we go test it out today?"
Link chuckled. "I'm sure we'll have more than enough opportunities to do just that."
Zelda grinned and stared lovingly at the blade, before remembering she had another gift for Link as well. She handed him the second package, which he could tell was a weapon just by looking at it. He opened it, and his jaw dropped.
Zelda (and Kiwi) had commissioned a weapon set for him that were white and light blue in color with gold accents. The White Sword and Shield had higher attack stats and comparable defense and durability compared to his current equipment, as well as a modest boost to attack speed. "I love it... thank you so much, baby."
"Merry Christmas, my Hero."
They got up and got dressed, and met Kiwi outside her house with their new weapons equipped. Kiwi was excited to see Link using the sword she had helped Zelda commission for him (even though she hadn't told him about Kiwi's help) as well as the blade Zelda was carrying that Link had forged for her. She was in a hurry to get going as well, so they teleported to the Soh Kofi Shrine in the northeastern reaches of Floor 4. They hunted their way southwest towards the center of the floor, eventually arriving at a new, larger settlement called Goron Outpost. The only thing above ground was an inn, so they decided to knock off early for the day and enjoy the rest of Christmas together, while leaving the exploration for the following day.
Link cooked a fabulous dinner, Zelda made an amazing dessert, and Kiwi supplied some imported whiskey she said came from a region beyond Necluda. Wherever it came from, it tasted good, and all three party members had several shots which left them feeling really nice.
Kiwi noticed Zelda starting to get a little handsy with Link so she excused herself, saying she was going to get some ice cream. "I think I'll have four scoops tonight, since it is Christmas."
"Okay... thanks for the warning, I guess?" Link said, clearly baffled by the specificity of her plans. Zelda said nothing, because she understood what Kiwi had actually meant.
===== Flashback: Necluda City, 13 days prior =====
Zelda and Kiwi sat together at a restaurant in town. Zelda had ordered for both of them, which confused Kiwi to no end. "Zelda, why did you bring me here?"
"To answer your questions."
"Umm, okay..."
A couple minutes later, a server returned and placed a plain dish of ice cream in front of Kiwi. She started eating, and Zelda said, "That's good, isn't it?"
Kiwi nodded, unsure what she was supposed to be learning from simply eating ice cream.
"Think of that ice cream as sex. It's good, it's enjoyable, it satisfies your cravings."
"Oh... that's weird, but okay."
A few more minutes passed, and their server returned with something that made Kiwi drop her spoon mid-shovel. For sitting in front of Zelda was the biggest banana split sundae to ever exist in Aincrad, or possibly anywhere else. Two bananas, six scoops of ice cream, whipped cream, sprinkles, nuts, chocolate syrup, strawberries, and three cherries on top. Kiwi was now visibly drooling at the mere sight of it.
"This is sex with someone you're in love with. This is what it's like when Link and I have sex."
"Whoa... it all makes sense now. But, umm... are you going to, you know..."
Zelda laughed and pushed the treat to the middle of the table, and Kiwi went absolutely ham on it. She had a few spoons herself, to be sure, but the point was the analogy and the point had clearly been made.
Kiwi had a flash of inspiration as they left the restaurant...
No sooner was the door closed behind Kiwi than Zelda was all over Link. She had the room and her Hero to herself for the next four hours, and damned if she'd waste a single minute of it.