*Still Mikasa's flashback*
They walked along the forest maintaining the conversation going even when they thought they had nothing else to say. The path became steeper and the sound of water became clearer the more she followed him. It would have gone past her, due to how intrigued the conversation had made her. Somehow it never stopped, they wanted to know everything about each other. Mikasa wanted to know why he did certain things in the ways he did. Why he thought the way he did. And more importantly the feelings he felt as far as their upcoming mission was concerned. Of course there would be things that they would always disagree in, however she was always intrigued by his thought process.
"Here we are." Levi stepped forward past a tree, she realized that there were no more trees past where he was. Mikasa could hear flowing water get louder the closer she stepped. He held out her hand to bring her close to him. They were standing 40 feet above a large body of water, a large waterfall flowing down from the river. A waterfall off to the side, significantly higher than they were currently. Regardless their current height was high enough to send shivers down her spine. The sight was quite amazing, the sun light illuminated the green of the forrest and reflected the blue color of the water.
"This is…" she couldn't find the right word. "beautiful." She didn't even get to finish her sentence before turning around to find her Captain yanking off his clothes. Without any warning he ran and jumped off the cliff that they had been standing on. There was a big splash, and Mikasa's stomach fell inwards. As the comprehension finally set in she began frantically she calling his name. Emotions ran through her both mad and worried over the idiot that would be stupid enough to jump off a cliff. "LEVI!" her eyes searched for his body in the water.
That adrenaline junky would die quickly, if she did not find a way to stop him. Finally she saw him raise up from below, swimming right under her.
"JUMP IN." He commanded.
"ARE YOU INSANE!" Mikasa cared more about her life than obviously this man did.
"YOU KILL GIANT MONSTERS FOR A LIVING. SURELY A SMALL CLIFF WONT MAKE YOU SCARED."
"THIS IS NO SMALL CLIFF. PLUS WHEN I FIGHT SAID MONSTERS I HAVE EQUIPMENT, THAT DOESN'T LET MET FALL." Mikasa tried to argue.
"TRUST ME, YOU WONT DIE! I WOULD NEVER LET YOU." Levi voice reassured him. "YOU'LL LOVE IT."
She hesitated, promising herself that she would not risk her life for something so stupid like this. Thoughts of potential outcomes began racing through her mind. She was unable to make why her body proceeded to take off her boots. She could come up with several logical reasons as to why this was a bad idea, and why she shouldn't attempt to do what he asked. However the fact that he called for her trust, pulled at her. It was stupid, but somehow he had done it. Mikasa apparently would jump of a cliff for him, a sense of peace taking over her as she took off the rest of her clothes off. She was left with her white undershirt and her panties.
First she threw both their bags over the edge, with their clothes and shoes inside of them. Hopefully the bags would not let them get too wet. She refused to look down. Instead she stepped back, breathed in, and her legs carrying her faster before she could change her mind.
The feeling of free falling was one that she had become so accustomed too, as well as the impact her body would have to endure due to the 3DMG equipment catching her before she fell. In truth she did not appreciate the feeling much, but she had little choice in the matter regarding that. For the longest time she felt that Eren was her reason for living. For the longest time this sufficed her need for meaningful life. If Eren wanted to be in Survey Corps, then she would follow. If he ever changed his mind, she was willing to do the same. Whatever he desired she would comply without a hesitation. That is until Levi came along. Who knows if it was for good or for worse. With Levi she didn't feel that need to please everything he ever wanted, she could stand up to him. She was free in a way that she could never be with Eren. It took Levi to show her how she no longer wanted to settle, Mikasa would live her life with a purpose owed only to herself.
Yet the thought that Eren would ever find out about her relationship made her stomach swirl with anxiety. Would he reject her? Or would he be happy that she was finally happy, even if it was with a man older? If the day ever came Mikasa was not sure what the outcome would be. But she did not think it would not please Eren to say the least. That is not say that she believed him to grow jealous of the Captain, but rather she expected him to act like a big brother. A big brother that would grow protective of his sister. She had resigned long ago that Eren would never see her in the same way that at some point she wanted him to. Deep down she had always known, but the glimmer of hope that one day he would wake up and realize that she was there, was enough to get her out of bed each morning. Since Levi, those feelings dissipated into oblivion. Heichou was the gate keeper of her dreams, and thoughts, most of them wanting for a future in which they would be together.
As she fell through the air, and an epiphany struck her. Levi had replaced her first love, the effect Eren had belonged entirely to her captain. However she felt like her own person with Levi, not just a protector from harm.
The cold water meet her body, and soon surrounded her with its touch. It was colder than she expected, but it felt delightful. Onyx eyes opening still within the depth of the stream. The adrenaline pumping through her veins pushing itself, until she finally came down from its high. This was peace this was happiness. She wanted to stay here forever. Forget about the upcoming mission and just for once live to the fullest.
A pair of arms wrapped around her chest pulling her up, before she could stop them. Her mind rapidly returning to her body and her vision revealing a pair of blue eyes looking at her with desperation, and confusion. "Mikasa, are you alright?" his voice was rough with worry.
"Yes… Of course." She was equally as dumbfounded. What had happened? Levi arms still wrapped tightly around her body.
"Don't scare me like that, its not funny." He looked pissed. Like somehow she had offended him.
"Levi, you are not making sense right know." She pulled his arms off so that she could see him better. "You told me too jump."
"Yes I did but I did not tell you to drown now did I?" His concerned face slowly fading away after knowing that she was alright. "Why were you down there for so long?"
"In the water?"
"Yes"
"I was lost in thought I suppose… but frankly this is ridiculous, why am I explaining to you this…" A serious look emerging on her face, as she realized he had nearly scared her to death just moments ago. "Specially when you were the one that scared ME, by jumping off a goddamn cliff." Mikasa threw her hands up the in the air. "With absolutely no WARNING" they were quiet for a moment.
"A warning might have been a good call… I can admit to that." He sighed before continuing. "But at least I came up as soon as I could so that YOU knew that I was okay. YOU however chose to sit down there, scaring me half to death."
"Was it really that long? I didn't come up because I felt at peace…" a soft admittance to both Levi and herself. "I don't get the feeling often, I suppose." A genuine gush of guilt washed over her. "I'm sorry. It was never my intention to scare you." Levi moved towards her grasping her closer to him, before she had the chance to move away.
Embracing her tightly he whispered, " No I'm sorry Mikasa I overreacted. It just when it comes to you I cant take any chances…" he paused. " You are the only thing that matters."
A confession that left her speechless. Could it be that the once cold captain agonized over her well being? Just like she did with his. She just embraced him tighter, as if she knew that he needed it maybe more than she did. Mikasa knew that Levi would always hold dear place in her heart. No matter what ever happened Captain Levi, would be there. It was a comforting thought that she never wanted to lose. In fact, since her parents nobody aside from maybe Mrs. Jaeger ever hugged her like this. This was the first time Mikasa had ever thought about it, but it was true. Since that tragic day that the titans broke through Wall Maria, she had been the one having to take care of everybody. Levi was the first person to care enough indulge her with the affection she never knew she needed. They had several other days where they had just laid together, wrapped up with only a blanket, but she had never paid it attention, to how much she had indulged in his affections. Or how much those touches would comfort her.
Time would not stop for them or anyone. Today she was determined to find out everything there was to know about her beloved captain. Who knew what horrible tragedies wall Maria would bring but regardless she had to take full advantage of the time they have. All the question she had held off on would need to be answered. Just in case fate was not on their side.
"Levi…"
"Hmmm" The sound of his voice vibrating on her head as he spoke.
"You've never told me how Erwin got you to join the Corps?" It was a question she had always wondered about, but she hoped that maybe it would distract him and hopefully herself. Instead of being open he stiffened. She could tell the question had the adverse affect that she thought it would have.
He sighed but hesitantly gave in, "He actually hunted me down, and would not allow me to refuse his offer. Well it wasn't really an offer, more like command that I could not refuse." Levi continued with a matter a fact fashion.
"Hunted you down? Like some kind of animal?"
Levi lightly chuckled, "It's not too far off actually. I was not a good person before the scouts."
"Didn't you live in the Capital?"
"Below it to be honest, but your point being" his tone had a slight annoyance to it. Mikasa wanted to keep prying, she wanted to know how he became the man he was. The man she loved. She had not been an angel either, so the last thing she wanted was to make him feel shame.
"I don't know I just assumed that you had to be-" she was interrupted.
"Short of a saint to be accepted there or something along those lines."
"Well thats what was taught to us, 'only the best of humanity lived in the inner walls" Knowing what she knew now, the answer was probably the farthest from the truth.
"That place is more crime infested than the entirety of Wall Maria and Wall Rose put together. They have this higher than thou mentality, and they trick the people of the outer walls to believe that Wall Sina has the most superior people. They are the biggest cons, and unfortunately the most protected," his voice rattled with an anger that she had never witnessed from him. "The pigs of the Military Police are in cohorts with the gangs and criminals. Basically crime runs rampant through the city, and nobody blinks and eye."
"So how did you get caught by Erwin?"
"I was indoctrinated into a gang from an early age… basically from the moment my mother died. I was alone and well anything looks good to an orphan. You would kill and steal for a glimpse of being part of a family." Mikasa's breath was caught in her throat. He knew what it felt like, what she felt like for the longest time. "Erwin caught wind that there was some kid in the city that could fend off his best soldiers."A small laugh escaping his throat. "When he caught me, I figured I would end up in a ditch somewhere."
"… Were your crimes that serious…" She couldn't believe that her now rule following captain could have been a thug. The mere thought would've been incomprehensible if she was hearing it from anybody else.
"Like I said I was a bad guy, and in a bad group. Erwin pulled me out of it before I could do enough irreparable harm to others. It wasn't easy, not even a little bit. I was stubborn, cruel, and annoying." Levi laughed, "I really don't know how I didn't end up in a ditch…Anyways after some training, Erwin basically threw me out with the titans. I learned everything I know basically because of that."
Mikasa wiped the water from her face, and pulled back her hair. "Did you not go through the 3 years of training?"
"No, Erwin wanted me out on the field a quickly as possible. Since he already knew I could fight as well use the 3DM gear it was just a matter of experience with the titans. I think in total I spent 2 months officially training"
"Thats crazy." However it did explain his reluctance to trust anybody except for maybe Erwin. He had never had the experience of going through training with others. Even Mikasa, who had vowed never to let anybody else in (aside from Armin and Eren) could not help but allow some of her fellow comrades in. Specially after the 3 years they spent together, enduring the same shit, and seeing the terrible atrocities that they all witnessed together. "I couldn't imagine going through it alone."
"My whole life has basically been just me, its not too different," two arms wrapped around him. His pain was her pain, and anything in her power she could do she would to alleviate it.
"I hope that its different now." Part of her wanted to kick herself in the face for claiming that. Firstly she didn't mean because of herself, rather she meant since his time in the Corps. Secondly she didn't want to creep him out by placing herself so intimately within his life. She loved him, and he loved her but the future of this relationship was as uncertain as it could get. "I mean-"
"It is" his arms pulling her tightly before he placed a long kiss on her lips. "Everything is different."
They swam around for what felt like hours, spending each moment learning even more about each other. Mikasa confessed the real reason why she was so attached to Eren. The reason behind joining the Corps as well as why she was so keen on protecting him. Mikasa slightly expected to receive some sort of judgement from him, but instead all she got was his understanding of why things were the way they were. He did not berate her for not having ambitions other than Eren's protection, it was like he understood everything now. Levi even asked her if she felt any other type of affection for the young titan, to which she answered with the truth.
"I love him," she paused to look at the Captain. His face remained unaffected by this. As if he already expected it, his hand was clenched in a tight fist however. "But not in the same way I did once. The feeling has evolved since you and I began-." She saw him let out a deep breath, and visibly relax in front of her.
"Good." He paused, and moved closer to her. "If you still loved that brat in romantic sort of way. I don't know how I would handle it. I think the jealousy would eat me alive. I just love you too much, I won't ever share your heart with anybody else." She laughed knowing that as long as Levi was around, no man could ever replace him.