Chapter 6: Hogwarts Musical
Siri found a friend on the train, a fellow by the name of James Potter. The two are already thick as thieves. Least he has someone to bond with. I had to settle for making awkward small-talk with a couple of Muggleborn girls and their greasy-haired friend. The train cannot get to Hogwarts fast enough.
The door swung open at once. A tall, black-haired witch in emerald-green robes stood there. She had a very stern face and Leo's first thought was that this was not someone to cross. Which only made him want to do it all the more.
"The firs' years, Professor McGonagall," said Hagrid.
"Thank you, Hagrid. I will take them from here."
She pulled the door wide. The entrance hall was so big that Leo felt the creator must be compensating for something. The stone walls were lit with flaming torches like the ones at Gringotts, the ceiling was too high to make out, and a magnificent marble staircase facing them led to the upper floors.
They followed Professor McGonagall across the flagged stone floor. Leo could hear the drone of hundreds of voices from a doorway to the right — the rest of the school must already be here — but Professor McGonagall showed the first years into a small, empty chamber off the hall. They crowded in, Leo standing off to the side whilst everyone else stood rather closer together than they would usually have done, peering about nervously.
"Welcome to Hogwarts," said Professor McGonagall. "The start-of-term banquet will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony because, while you are here, your house will be something like your family within Hogwarts. You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory, and spend free time in your house common room.
"The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history and each has produced outstanding witches and wizards. While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn your house points, while any rule-breaking will lose house points. At the end of the year, the house with the most points is awarded the house cup, a great honor. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours."
I sense many lost points in my house's future. Leo gave a wicked grin.
"The Sorting Ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarten yourselves up as much as you can while you are waiting."
Her eyes lingered for a moment on the round-faced boy's cloak, which was fastened under his left ear, and on Ron's smudged nose. Leo gave her a wink when her eyes landed on him, his grin widening at her stern expression.
"I shall return when we are ready for you," said Professor McGonagall. "Please wait quietly."
She left the chamber. Leo moved from his position on the wall and approached Ron and Harry.
"How exactly do they sort us into houses?" Harry was asking Ron.
"Some sort of test, I think. Fred said it hurts a lot, but I think he was joking."
"Oh, he told you about the test too?" Leo suppressed a mischievous smile as he kept a straight face. "They put you in a metal chair and light a fire under it. However long you last determines what house you get into. That's why Gryffindors have burned bums – they sit the longest. Heard it's called 'the hot seat'."
"Fred and George's bums aren't burned!" Ron replied indignantly.
"Speaking from experience or just assuming, Ronnie?" Leo questioned, grinning widely when Ron's ears turned red.
"You're joking... right, Leo?" Harry questioned nervously.
"Absolutely," Leo replied, grinning at him. "He said we actually have to fight giant spiders. Lee knicked one of them from last year and brought it on the train. It was wicked."
Ron's face paled considerably at this as Harry looked stricken. Leo was half-tempted to apologize and come clean, but felt it would be more hilarious to let them sweat it out and discover what was awaiting them alongside everyone else.
Several people behind him screamed, prompting him to jump and shout, "Son of a —!"
Thankfully, he wasn't the only one who was startled. About twenty ghosts had just streamed through the back wall. Pearly-white and slightly transparent, they glided across the room talking to one another and hardly glancing at the first years. They seemed to be arguing. What looked like a fat little monk was saying: "Forgive and forget, I say, we ought to give him a second chance —"
"My dear Friar, haven't we given Peeves all the chances he deserves? He gives us all a bad name and you know, he's not really even a ghost — I say, what are you all doing here?"
A ghost wearing a ruff and tights had suddenly noticed the first years.
"Having a party. It was getting quite rowdy when you lot showed up," Leo replied when everyone else remained silent. "Now it's just... dead depressing."
"Oh ho! Quite the bold one, aren't you lad?" said the Fat Friar, smiling at him. "About to be Sorted, I suppose?"
A few people nodded mutely.
"Hope to see you in Hufflepuff!" said the Friar. "My old house, you know."
"Move along now," said a sharp voice. "The Sorting Ceremony's about to start."
Professor McGonagall had returned. One by one, the ghosts floated away through the opposite wall.
"Now, form a line," Professor McGonagall told the first years, "and follow me."
Leo strutted to the front of the line, following right behind Professor McGonagall as they walked out of the chamber, back across the hall, and through a pair of double doors into the Great Hall.
At this point, even Leo couldn't help but feel impressed. It was lit by thousands and thousands of candles that were floating in midair over four long tables, where the rest of the students were sitting. These tables were laid with glittering golden plates and goblets. At the top of the hall was another long table where the teachers were sitting. Professor McGonagall led the first years up here, so that they came to a halt in a line facing the other students, with the teachers behind them. The hundreds of faces staring at them looked like pale lanterns in the flickering candlelight. Dotted here and there among the students, the ghosts shone misty silver. Leo looked upward and saw a velvety black ceiling dotted with stars. Either it's magical or a skylight. Either way, that's pretty sweet.
Leo quickly looked down again as Professor McGonagall silently placed a four-legged stool in front of the first years. On top of the stool she put a pointed wizard's hat. This hat was patched and frayed and extremely dirty. It reminded Leo somewhat of Grimmauld Place in that sense. He suddenly found himself quite homesick for a moment.
For a few seconds, there was complete silence. Then the hat twitched. A rip near the brim opened wide like a mouth — and the hat began to sing:
"Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,
But don't judge on what you see,
I'll eat myself if you can find
A smarter hat than me.
You can keep your bowlers black,
Your top hats sleek and tall,
For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat
And I can cap them all.
There's nothing hidden in your head
The Sorting Hat can't see,
So try me on and I will tell you
Where you ought to be.
You might belong in Gryffindor,
Where dwell the brave at heart,
Their daring, nerve, and chivalry
Set Gryffindors apart;
You might belong in Hufflepuff,
Where they are just and loyal,
Those patient Hufflepuffs are true
And unafraid of toil;
Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,
if you've a ready mind,
Where those of wit and learning,
Will always find their kind;
Or perhaps in Slytherin
You'll make your real friends,
Those cunning folk use any means
To achieve their ends.
So put me on! Don't be afraid!
And don't get in a flap!
You're in safe hands (though I have none)
For I'm a Thinking Cap!"
The whole hall burst into applause as the hat finished its song. It bowed to each of the four tables and then became quite still again. Leo found himself somewhat disappointed that the test was sitting in a chair and wearing a hat. He was hoping for something a little more dangerous. Like troll wrestling. He grinned, catching Fred's eye at the Gryffindor table
Professor McGonagall now stepped forward holding a long roll of parchment.
"When I call your name, you will put on the hat and sit on the stool to be sorted," she said. "Abbott, Hannah!"
A pink-faced girl with blonde pigtails stumbled out of line, put on the hat, which fell right down over her eyes, and sat down. A moments pause —
"HUFFLEPUFF!" shouted the hat. The table on the right cheered and clapped as Hannah went to sit down at the Hufflepuff table. Leo saw the ghost of the Fat Friar waving merrily at her.
"Black, Leo!"
Leo ignored all the curious whispers and stares as he approached the hat, instead deigning to wave at everyone in much the same manner he had seen the Queen do on the telly. He was well-aware of why his name caused a stir. It's because I'm wildly attractive, obviously. Leo grinned before the hat dropped over his eyes. Next second he was looking at the black inside of the hat. He waited.
"Leo Black," said a small voice in his ear. "Can't say I was looking forward to Sorting you. Your father made quite a mess of things when I tried to Sort him. Made things very difficult."
If you're digging for an apology, we'll be sitting here for a very long time.
"Your mother was quite simple. Hufflepuff, through and through. Perhaps you...?" the hat trailed off. "Hmm, plenty of loyalty, but no work ethic."
That's fair.
"Ravenclaw is not even an option."
That's rude.
"Plenty of cunning, but no ambition or sense of self-preservation whatsoever. Not Slytherin."
What eleven-year-old even has ambition?
"That just leaves – GRYFFINDOR!"
Leo took the hat off, frowning when everyone just stared at him in shock.
Leo raised an eyebrow and said, "If people don't start cheering, this is going to get very awkward very fast."
A few scattered laughs were heard before an old man with a long silvery beard rose from the staff table and began to clap. Other teachers and students followed, though Leo noticed Fred, George, and Lee were some of the first. Leo gave an over-the-top bow before strutting over to the Gryffindor table and taking a seat next to Lee and across from Fred. He spent the remainder of the Sorting tuning everything out, at least until -
"Potter, Harry!"
Leo's head perked up as Harry stepped forward and whispers suddenly broke out like little hissing fires all over the hall.
"Potter, did she say?"
"The Harry Potter?"
Leo rolled his eyes at this as he waited anxiously for the hat to declare -
"GRYFFINDOR!"
"YES!" Leo shouted just before everyone started cheering.
Harry took off the hat and walked shakily toward the Gryffindor table. Percy the Prefect got up and shook his hand vigorously, while the Weasley twins – as well as Leo, after a moment - yelled, "We got Potter! We got Potter!" Harry sat down opposite the ghost in the ruff they'd seen earlier.
And now there were only three people left to be sorted. "Thomas, Dean," a black boy even taller than Ron, joined Harry at the Gryffindor table. "Turpin, Lisa," became a Ravenclaw and then it was Ron's turn. He was pale green by now. Leo watched him expectantly and a second later the hat had shouted, "GRYFFINDOR!"
Leo clapped loudly with the rest as Ron collapsed into the chair next to Harry.
"Zabini, Blaise," was made a Slytherin, ending the sorting. Professor McGonagall rolled up her scroll and took the Sorting Hat away. Leo looked down at his empty gold plate. He had only just realized how hungry he was. The single Chocolate Frog seemed ages ago.
The old man had gotten to his feet. He was beaming at the students, his arms opened wide, as if nothing could have pleased him more than to see them all there.
"Welcome," he said. "Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
"Thank you!"
He sat back down. Everybody clapped and cheered. Leo gave a snort of laughter.
"Best speech I've heard in years. Who is – bloody hell!" Leo cut himself off as his mouth fell open.
The dishes in front of him were now piled with food. He had never seen so many things he liked to eat on one table: roast beef, roast chicken, pork chops and lamb chops, sausages, bacon and steak, boiled potatoes, roast potatoes, fries, Yorkshire pudding, peas, carrots, gravy, ketchup, and, for some strange reason, peppermint humbugs.
Leo piled his plate with a bit of everything except the peppermints and began to eat. It was all delicious. Not quite Kreacher quality, but still good. Leo decided as he tore into his steak.
"Slow down there, Leo," George chuckled.
"Food's not going anywhere, mate," Fred added.
"Yes, it is," Leo corrected him, swallowing a large bite. "Into my mouth, down to my stomach, and out my -"
Lee placed a hand over Leo's mouth as some girls a few seats down threw them disgusted looks. Leo gave a polite wave before licking Lee's hand, prompting the boy to whip it away and wipe it on Leo's robes.
"Anyway, as I was saying earlier, who's the old fart?" Leo questioned.
"Right, forgot you were raised by Muggles -" Fred began.
"Muggles would imply that they were people, but continue."
The twins snorted before George continued, "That's Albus Dumbledore, greatest wizard of all time."
"Heard your dad could've given him a run for his money back in the day, though," Lee grinned.
"Uh-huh," Leo replied, absently putting a potato in his mouth as he observed the high table.
He caught the eye of a teacher with greasy black hair, a hooked nose, and sallow skin. The man's empty black eyes bored into his, narrowing into a sharp, stony glare. If looks could kill... pretty sure I'd be frozen to death. Or stoned. Either way -
"Who's the greasy-haired git glaring at me?" Leo inquired, nodding to the man.
"That's Snape," Lee answered, grabbing a chicken leg.
"Potions teacher," George expounded.
"Head of Slytherin house," Fred continued.
"And all-around git," the two finished.
"Doesn't seem like he's my biggest fan," Leo commented dryly.
"Don't take offense, he hates all Gryffindors equally," Lee assured him.
"Nice to know I'm not special."
When everyone had eaten as much as they could, the remains of the food faded from the plates, leaving them sparkling clean as before. A moment later the desserts appeared. Blocks of ice cream in every flavor you could think of, apple pies, treacle tarts, chocolate eclairs and jam doughnuts, trifle, strawberries, Jell-O, rice pudding... Leo, however, was only interested in one thing: chocolate.
After some time, the desserts too disappeared, and Professor Dumbledore got to his feet again. The hall fell silent.
"Ahem — just a few more words now that we are all fed and watered. I have a few start-of-term notices to give you.
"First years should note that the forest on the grounds is forbidden to all pupils. And a few of our older students would do well to remember that as well."
Dumbledore's twinkling eyes flashed in the direction of the Weasley twins. Leo grinned at them mischievously, silently asking for a tour later.
"I have also been asked by Mr. Filch, the caretaker, to remind you all that no magic should be used between classes in the corridors.
"Quidditch trials will be held in the second week of the term. Anyone interested in playing for their house teams should contact Madam Hooch.
"And finally, I must tell you that this year, the third-floor corridor on the right-hand side is out of bounds to everyone who does not wish to die a very painful death."
Challenge: Accepted.
"And now, before we go to bed, let us sing the school song!" cried Dumbledore. Leo noticed that the other teachers' smiles had become rather fixed.
Dumbledore gave his wand a little flick, as if he was trying to get a fly off the end, and a long golden ribbon flew out of it, which rose high above the tables and twisted itself, snakelike, into words.
"Everyone pick their favorite tune," said Dumbledore, "and off we go!"
And the school bellowed:
"Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hoggy Warty Hogwarts,
Teach us something please,
Whether we be old and bald
Or young with scabby knees,
Our heads could do with filling
With some interesting stuff,
For now they're bare and full of air,
Dead flies and bits of fluff,
So teach us things worth knowing,
Bring back what we've forgot,
just do your best, we'll do the rest,
And learn until our brains all rot."
Everybody finished the song at different times. At last, only the Weasley twins and Leo were left singing along to a very slow funeral march. Dumbledore conducted their last few lines with his wand and when they had finished, he was one of those who clapped loudest.
"Ah, music," he said, wiping his eyes. "A magic beyond all we do here! And now, bedtime. Off you trot!"
Leo bid farewell to the twins and Lee before getting up and following the other Gryffindor first years after Percy through the chattering crowds, out of the Great Hall, and up the marble staircase. Leo swiftly caught up Harry and Ron, waving politely at the moving portraits and occasionally making faces at them. They climbed more staircases, yawning and dragging their feet, and Leo was just wondering how far away their dormitory was when they came to a sudden halt.
A bundle of walking sticks was floating in midair ahead of them, and as Percy took a step toward them they started throwing themselves at him.
"Peeves," Percy whispered to the first years. "A poltergeist." He raised his voice, "Peeves — show yourself."
A loud, rude sound, like the air being let out of a balloon, answered.
"Do you want me to go to the Bloody Baron?"
There was a pop, and a little man with wicked, dark eyes and a wide mouth appeared, floating cross-legged in the air, clutching the walking sticks.
"Oooooooh!" he said, with an evil cackle. "Ickle Firsties! What fun!"
He swooped suddenly at them. They all ducked.
"Go away, Peeves, or the Baron'll hear about this, I mean it!" barked Percy. Peeves stuck out his tongue and vanished, dropping the walking sticks on the round-faced boy's head. They heard him zooming away, rattling coats of armor as he passed.
"You want to watch out for Peeves," said Percy, as they set off again. "The Bloody Baron's the only one who can control him, he won't even listen to us prefects. Here we are."
Pretty sure living people don't listen to prefects either, Perce.
At the very end of the corridor hung a portrait of a very fat woman in a pink silk dress. "Password?" she said.
"Caput Draconis," said Percy, and the portrait swung forward to reveal a round hole in the wall.
They all scrambled through it — the round-faced boy from earlier needing a leg up — and found themselves in the Gryffindor common room, a cozy, round room full of squashy armchairs.
Percy directed the girls through one door to their dormitory and the boys through another. At the top of a spiral staircase — they were obviously in one of the towers — they found their beds at last: six four-posters hung with deep red, velvet curtains. Their trunks had already been brought up. Too tired to talk much, they pulled on their pajamas and fell into bed.
New place. New friends. New adventures just waiting to happen. What could be better? Leo sighed.