His first plan was out. Dudley huffed with the responses of the nearby portraits. The Fat Lady of Gryffindor Tower was not returning anytime soon. Why would a house have such a temperamental entrance? Sure, he could guess there was some reason to keep the Fat Lady, but he wasn't seeing the point of having a security system that literally got up and vacated the premises. And locked everyone out.
The second plan was never an option. Waiting it out would not work for his cousin. The real second plan was to make a loop around this floor of the castle, using Harry's odd knack of sneaking to their advantage, completing the loop to see if the Fat Lady was returned by the time they returned.
If she wasn't back by then, things would get tricky without turning themselves in. Because his next brightest idea was to get them all to an area not patrolled where they could also sleep. It wasn't really ideal though. At least Harry tried to make a go for Gryffindor Tower when students were asleep. They'd have to make a go at waking early and sneaking out of the Slytherin Dungeons before anyone woke and noticed an extra pair of first years.
"Do you trust Harry to wait quietly," he asked when Hermione complained about following his second plan. Harry was already racing forward to poke his head around a corner, waving them all forward with a thrilled grin tossed over his shoulder. "Moving around will keep us all less bored. Or getting annoyed at each other."
Neville nodded from beside Dudley and offered the girl a tentative smile when she shot him a look. Hermione paused, her large front teeth nibbling at her lip as her gaze slid back over to Harry. Who was now preforming an odd bopping motion as he waved both arms, grabbing and pulling the air as if he was dragging them to him. Like ocean waves washing sandcastles away along the shoreline. Dudley stared for a moment, then glanced back to Hermione's aghast face. And decided to prove his point on how well he knew Harry.
"Looks like a dance move."
Neville groaned. "Why?" His cousin's face lit up and he let loose a jumble of sounds that vaguely resembled the words of 'Mr. Roboto'. How Harry even thought that song paired up with his bouncing or waving arms, Dudley had not a clue and he wasn't asking. He nudged Neville, pointing over to Hermione, both giving the other old amused and sympathetic looks. Hermione dumbfounded, silently followed him and Neville toward Harry at the corner. Neville cautiously peeked around the corner.
"No one's there," Harry said breezily. Then continued his song and dance routine for the surrounding portraits.
Hermione snapped out of her shock. "You're going to get us all caught," she hissed.
It appeared as though her admiration of his cousin and hoping to be his friend was beginning to wane.
Harry only grinned widely, one waving arm grabbing hold of her and the other onto Dudley. Neville went wide eyed and latched onto Dudley. The round faced boy shook his head at the grinning Harry. Who grinned even wider. "The rest of you are ready to go then? Well, come on. Leapfrog awaits!" And he shot off along the edge of the corridor, dragging them along, stumbling after.
They didn't quite make it to the Great Hall.
The sight of Harry panicked, shoving them back around the corner, filled no one with any sense of security. He put a finger to his lips. Dudley frowned as his cousin put three fingers horizontally across both his cheeks. Cat. And not some student's pet cat either. Sure enough, the group froze as Mrs. Norris padded around the corner and stared at them.
Harry leapt, arms outstretched, prepared to pin the cat down somewhere near his chest. Missing, Harry hunched down on the floor and patted at Mrs. Norris's tail. The cat twitched her tail out of his hand and stared at Harry, as though the cat was debating the option of playing with his cousin. Dudley stared. Not questioning it. If this worked, the blond was not going to question it. But it would figure with Harry's history surrounding the word 'play'. Even the bitter old Caretaker's cat wouldn't be immune.
"D-does that work," Neville asked soft and amazed.
Mrs. Norris flickered her ear at his voice and yowled. Loudly.
"Not now. Run!"
Startled, Neville grabbed at Dudley and Dudley grabbed back, but Neville had already lost his footing over the armor. The whole body of armor fell over the two of them. Any word that fell out of his mouth at that, even he didn't catch with how loud the crashing and clanging of it echoed for the entire world to hear. Or at least the castle. With the Caretaker's excited shout following the great clatter. Filch would love to put them through some terror if he got his hands on them. Dudley pulled Neville up, his cousin hopping in place frantically beside them, before they all took off.
Realizing Hermione had remained frozen, Dudley shouted back at her. "Come on!"
"This is kind of like your gran finding out what we were doing in your greenhouse," Harry spoke up as they ran. Hermione called out behind them as she hurried to catch up. "And Mum chasing us down."
Panting from running, Neville still had enough in him to tell off the glee. "This is worse Harry!" Dudley gave a great tug as Neville had slowed from losing breath to do that. Neither of them were quite as fast as Harry, who got a hold of Dudley's robes to pull at both, Neville's ire at him going right over his head. Hermione had caught up with the three of them by this point, looking more worried than ready to turn them in for being out after curfew.
"What do we do? What do we do? We're going to lose points."
Harry from ahead and Neville from behind both twisted to look at Dudley.
"Filch thinks the worst of students. What's the closest worst spot to be in Harry?"
"Girls bathroom," Harry jokingly suggested. "The third floor corridor Albus gave the warning about."
"Show us," Dudley directed.
Harry agreed without protest, speeding up slightly. "Okay."
"We're going where," Hermione sputtered out as they ran.
"Here," Harry proclaimed. They'd stopped at a door that looked no different than any other door. The blond didn't take the time to think too much on the lack of warning sign posted. Dudley pulled and pushed at the door. Locked. "What's the plan Dud?"
"Mark it, blast it somehow, make it look like we got in," Dudley muttered to himself. "Then ditch. He thinks the worst, so he'll think we did get in and look longer here."
"Oh." Hermione's face had cleared of its panic, hearing a solution that did not actually place them in the forbidden corridor. "Oh honestly."
Pushing past them, she brought out her wand. Dudley stared in surprise. He hadn't figured she'd step forward to cause damage to school property herself. Not with how she loudly vocalized the school rules. His cousin appeared just as surprised, sharing a look with him, silently asking if he should do anything. The blond shrugged. He doubted this would ruin his plan. Green eyes turned back to Hermione, eager and curious.
"Alohomora!"
The door unlocked, cracking open slightly. Alert, Dudley watched the open space, pretty sure the plan would be run if anything happened. There was no sound other than their breathing though. No movement beyond the door.
"That works. You've worked that far ahead in the textbooks?" Hermione shifted in a mixture of embarrassment and wariness. "Nice."
There was no way he'd be able to pull that one off yet despite his own reading ahead. A bit of jealousy streaked through the blond, but he shook it off as he knew Hermione didn't mind helping him with spell work. Opposite really. She was so enthusiastic to talk and show everything she was learning about magic. The bushy hair covered her face as she ducked her head, smiling tentatively at him from more pleasure than embarrassment.
Hermione swiveled, stern face back in place. "Don't you even think about going in there now Harry."
Harry scowled fiercely. "And completely bugger up Dudley's plan? Never! What kind of cousin do you think I am?"
Her mouth dropped open. Obviously surprised at seeing his cousin's whole manner change.
"She wasn't suggesting that Harry. Only making sure my plan is followed." Neville nodded at her, encouraging her to nod along in agreement to Dudley's pacifying words. Brows furrowing down as she looked between them all, Hermione eventually nodded at Harry, who relaxed and smiled back at her. Brown eyes took one last, wide, look through the crack of the unlocked door. Not wanting to stick around, Dudley spoke again. "I don't think I want to take a chance on the security system that wanders away when it feels like it, so we need to get back to our common room."
"Can do," Harry responded cheerfully. "This way."
Barely a minute went by after leaving the forbidden side of the third floor when they heard the Caretaker crowing. "These little beasts are in trouble now Mrs. Norris! They've gone inside! Perhaps I should close the door so they'll discover why it's out of bounds. A little maiming will put an end to," his voice trailed off low enough that they couldn't hear him from where they were.
"M-m-maiming," Neville stuttered out. "W-what's in t-t-there?"
"Not us Neville, come on. He's busy."
Somehow, it wasn't until Harry said the Slytherin password that what the plan was hit Hermione and her objections.
"We can't go in there," she hissed. Pulling away, she wrapped her pink bathrobe tightly around herself. "That's the Slytherin Common Room."
Neville paused in following Dudley and Harry inside. "T-the Fat Lady isn't there. And they have rooms. We-we'll just wake up early, right?"
"Right," Dudley agreed. "Harry can play lookout."
His cousin lit up at being told this. "Yes!"
"This isn't a game," Hermione retorted crossly.
"Yes it is." Dudley chorused together with Harry and Neville. It was always a game with Harry.
"I'm great at games," Harry declared. "I won't lose."
"Didn't you want to play with Harry after missing the chance on the playground?"
Hermione went still, stunned at being caught out. "I, well, yes. But this isn't a game! We could get caught and lose points and be expelled. And I can't go into your dorm room. I'm a girl!"
His cousin shrugged. "Boys in one room, girl in the other. But you can't take Dudley's room even if it is the neater one."
Hermione's face drained of color. Sighing, Harry gave Dudley a look, before grabbing a hold of Hermione and pulling her into their common room. Neville nervously followed them, sticking close to Dudley as they went along. The blond gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder and rubbed at his left leg. It was starting to feel sore from moving all day and night. While Harry may have worded it poorly, it was true enough on Dudley not wanting her in his room.
"My room's not that bad, see?"
"There's no enchantment to keep the girls out of the boys' dormitories?"
"What?"
Hermione shook her head from all three of them speaking at once again. "If anyone finds us, I'll tell them the truth and Neville will back me up. Now. I'm going to bed before either of you get another bright idea to get us all expelled or killed by a cerberus." With that, the girl shut Harry's door on them.
"C-c-cerberus?"
Harry grinned. "So she does have a sense of humor."
Somehow, Dudley doubted that.
Author's Note: I know. Again. I'm awful. As I said before, it's been a while. Feels strange. I've been writing more ahead on a couple different stories, so a free Sunday on this one feels strange. And strange to be overthinking a simple 'What If' twist. Although, I think Dudley may be starting to forget any of his worries over the issue that brought him to Hogwarts and I think I ought to be reminding him soon. Thank you to the favorites and follows and to the reviewer duj.