I saw that this story was featured on The Lemonade Stand this week, so Hi **waves** to everyone who has come due to that recommendation! Thanks to everyone who has followed, favorited, and commented on this story! It means the world to me :).

Huge thanks to Sherry and Paige for beta-ing and pre-reading for me! I would be lost without you guys :).

"Our faces reflected in separate windshields

And all our body hair pricked up an elephant eyelash.

Should we be tempted by thief or saint

It seems I leave and you stay

To crawl the cage and curse.

But don't regret the done dirt, there is no life plan set,

You just swallow the cold and follow your breath until death.

Now even if the will to sleep persists

I can't 'cause a harsh cloth, it grazes my blisters"

-Why?-

EPOV:

I always feel as if I am being born again when the air grows crisp in the fall. It is nice to feel settled, something I would have never imagined myself enjoying. It has been two months since I have purchased my first apartment and it still feels as if it was just yesterday that I held Charlie for the first time. He has grown a bit and has become even more animated. Part of me wishes he would stay this way forever, but another part of me cannot wait until he can verbalize his thoughts.

Another thing to grow, has been my relationship with Bella. She has become my best friend and we spend every night alternating between our apartments, watching movies, playing games, and sometimes, just staying up into the late hours of the night just talking. Charlie loves her as well, always wanting to play with our beautiful neighbor. Every night, I want to ask her on a proper date, but fear always stops me. I don't want to mess up what we have right now. Could she see me the same after she turned me down? Some girls get so embarrassed about those types of things.

"What do you think I should do, Charlie?" I ask the giggling baby in my arms.

We have been watching Saturday morning cartoons and Scooby Doo in particular, cracks Charlie up. Charlie seems to be thinking for a moment, and then says a few "oohs," "daas," and "gaas," before he begins giggling again. I chuckle at him, it's impossible to be the least bit stressed with a happy baby in your arms.

"Maybe tonight will be the night, then," I muse, contemplating the best way to ask her.

As I think of ideas, I feel pretty stupid. I know I'm not good enough for someone like her. She deserves a man who has a bright future ahead of him, someone smarter than me. I would just bring baggage into her life. I just feel like a pre-existing condition...like I was born no good. I can't remember a time when anyone was proud of me, when anyone believed in me, I can't remember a time when I hadn't been a disappointment to someone. Should I really plague Bella with that? I'm lucky she is even friends with me.

Charlie grows fussy in my arms, and begins to cry. Suddenly, I realize I hadn't been paying attention to him, and he definitely has noticed. I rest his head on my shoulder and hold him close, and it is not long before his tears have ceased. He feels so little when I hold him like this, and I feel like I could hold him close forever. I rock him in my arms and go back to planning my possible date with Bella. If I gain the courage to ask her, I could always take her to a nice park or if I wait another month, the pumpkin patches will open and that could be a good idea... I could always push it off another month. The better she knows me, the better my chances will be.

"Do you think Bella will say yes?" I ask Charlie, as if he was a Magic 8 Ball.

Charlie laughs at me, and nuzzles his head against my neck. I suppose it is funny, isn't it? I'm a grown man, and yet, a girl makes me incredibly nervous. But it isn't just any girl, it's my best friend.

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"Charlie stood up today," I tell Bella over our dinner of Chinese takeout. "He pulled himself up off the floor and stood up for a few seconds."

I can't wipe the smile off of my face, I haven't been able to wipe it off my face since Charlie stood up this afternoon. My cheeks have started to hurt, but my happiness hasn't dissipated. When Charlie pulled himself off the floor while we were playing, I had to run and grab my phone to take multiple pictures. I only managed to snap one before he fell back down on his butt, but the one I managed to take is absolutely perfect. So much so, I've made it the background on my phone. It's a milestone in his life, and I feel so lucky that I was there to witness it. Seth would have been so proud.Maybe Kate and him are looking down on their son with proud smiles on their faces.

"That's amazing," Bella gushes with a delighted smile on her beautiful face. "Maybe he will do it for me again later!"

"If he hasn't passed out by the time dinner is over, then I am sure he will," I grin at her.

Charlie's eyes are drooping and he his holding tightly onto my thumb as he does every night before he falls asleep. He is so cute like this, and I can't help but watch him for a moment before I turn my attention back to Bella. She is staring at her cell phone with an annoyed frown on her face.

"What is it?" I ask, not enjoying the way her frown makes me feel.

"It's nothing," she says with a shake of her head. "It's just my sister thinks she is a matchmaker."

My brows shoot up and I feel nervous all of the sudden. Is her sister trying to set her up with someone? I could miss my chance with her if I don't ask her out now.

"What do you mean, a 'matchmaker'?" I ask, hating the nervousness I can hear in my voice.

"Well, Alice is trying to set me up on a blind date with one of her friends. I tried telling her that I don't feel comfortable with blind dates...but Alice is, persistent to say the least," she says with an agitated giggle.

"What are you going to tell her?"

Bella shrugs and takes a bite of her egg roll, "Well, I haven't been on a date in a year. I guess I'm not in the position to be shooing guys away." Bella laughs at her own comment and takes another bite of her meal.

I want to tell her that I'm interested, but before I can speak up, she continues. "Well, I've never really needed anyone, you know? I like being alone I guess. Alice has always been quite codependent and I've always been okay on my own. She doesn't get that, of course, she has always had a boyfriend." Bella pauses for a moment and then giggles at herself, "Sorry, I'm rambling again."

"It's okay," I grin, "I like your rambles."

"That's why you are my best friend," she says with a snort.

Her best friend. I know it to be true, but I wonder if her feelings do not go beyond that. I can't mess this up by asking her about her feelings. I have messed everything in my life up in the past, and I have only begun to turn things around recently. I just can't chance this.

If I lost Bella, I wouldn't know what I would do.

A/N: Don't worry guys, Bella hasn't put Edward in the friend zone haha. Writing a story in Edward's POV is so different, because Bella is the one who is the mystery. It's pretty fun! But, I was thinking about having an outtake or two in Bella's POV.

Also, there were a couple comments about where Charlie's mom is...she died with Seth in the car accident. There was a sentence that mentioned her death in the first chapter...but because of a few confused comments, I referenced it again in this chapter. Charlie's mom's name is Kate and she died with Seth in the drunk driving accident.

Song- "Gemini (Birthday Song)" by Why? They are one of my favorite bands…so check them out !