Happy Mother's Day Everyone! I hope everyone has had a great day today. I don't have any kids, but my mom is my best friend and a huge role model to me, so I can still celebrate.

Huge thanks to Sherry and Paige for beta-ing for me! You two girls are amazing and I don't know what I would do without you!

"Where are you and I'm so sorry

I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight

I need somebody and always

This sick strange darkness

Comes creeping on so haunting every time

And as I stared I counted

Webs from all the spiders

Catching things and eating their insides

Like indecision to call you

And hear your voice of treason

Will you come home and stop this pain tonight?"

-Blink-182-

EPOV:

The last few days have been difficult and I can't seem to shake the depression I have succumbed to. Paul has triggered many emotions I have wanted to ignore, and now that I must face them, I feel naked, stripped of all the armor I have been wearing for so long. Charlie has felt the waves of my pain, and I feel so guilty knowing what that does to him. Thank God for Bella. She has been an angel through this and allows me time to grieve as she takes care of the baby.

Bella can reach me when no one else can. She alone can pull me out of the darkness I seem to be drowning in. I've spent the last few days surviving, going to work, eating when appropriate, and going to sleep. Lately, it seems as if all I want to do is sleep.

The memories don't stop. Although, Bella said she was happy to remember her mother, all I wish to do is forget. Even in mourning, I feel inadequate. Seth deserves to be remembered, and I would rather avoid the pain, than give him that.

"Edward?" I heard Bella call from the doorway of my bedroom.

I felt her presence long before she opened her mouth to speak, but I had hoped my silence would deter her. I would tell her to leave me be, if I did not find her to be so soothing. It seems as if, she was the remedy for any ailment I may face.

"Edward, Charlie wants you." She comes forward with the baby in her arms, and continues, "I can't soothe him, I know he wants you."

She says my name as if she was trying to pull me back to shore, saving me from the waves that are crashing into me. Charlie's cries begin to resonate with me, and I reach for him. Holding him close, I feel his labored breaths against my cheek and feel his tiny body shaking in my arms.

"Shh, baby," I murmur as I pat him gently on the back, "I'm here. I got you."

He is trembling and I hang my head in shame, knowing that I should have been there for him, instead of lost in my own head. Hesitantly, my eyes meet Bella's, and I find that she doesn't share the same feelings as I do. She looks, relieved as she observes me...happy even.

"You're back," she says quietly. "I thought we had lost you for a moment."

"Was it that bad?" I asked, already knowing the answer she will give.

She wraps her arms around me, and I'm engulfed with the scent freesia, vanilla, and cream, the smell of my Bella. It's moments like these, when she gives me such compassion, that I wonder if I love her. I've never loved a person before, and the idea seems so foreign to me. I love my father, I love Charlie, but, loving Bella is a different feeling entirely.

"You needed time to grieve," she explains as she rests her head on my shoulder. "You never allowed yourself the chance to mourn."

"I thought," I pause, not wanting to realize it aloud, "I thought that if I allowed myself to feel, I would have to accept the truth. I want to talk to someone, Bella, I really do."

She appraises me for a moment, her eyes soften and her body relaxes against my side. I turn to look at her, and before I know it, her lips are on mine. It feels unlike anything else. Her lips are soft and her kiss is passionate. Her lack of experience is endearing and she ignites a fire in me, I know I will never be able to extinguish. I lose myself in her, until finally she pulls away, with the prettiest blush on her face. She giggles, seeming embarrassed, and I chuckled too, elated that we have finally shared a kiss. I've been wanting it for so long, but didn't want to push her boundaries. We haven't talked about it, but from the way it seems, she doesn't have much experience.

"That was nice," she comments, shyly.

Charlie is staring up at me with wide eyes and a happy smile. His cheeks are still wet with tears, but all of his unhappiness has vanished.

"That was more than nice."

It was perfect.If I had doubted her feelings before, I can no longer overlook them now. As hard as it is to believe, I finally realize she must feel the same way about me as I do about her. The thought is terrifying. What if I screw this up as I have screwed up so much else? How could someone like me possibly keep her?

Pushing any negativity aside, I decide to move forward. I have spent so much of my life at a standstill, never progressing in a single area and content with mediocrity. I don't want to stand still any longer, I want a relationship with her, as scary as it might be. I don't want to frighten her, by stating my feelings aloud, but I can begin to take steps in the right direction.

"Do you want to go to dinner with Charlie and me tonight? I'm itching to get out of this house," I smile, now feeling quite shy myself. "And, maybe some night soon, we can go to dinner, just you and I?"

Bella grins at me, and suddenly I feel foolish for my nervousness. This is Bella, my best friend, I should know by now I have nothing to be nervous about when it comes to her wanting to spend time with me. But every time I ask her to go out, I feel as if I'm regressing to my childhood, when I was very nerdy and extremely soft-spoken. I'm happy to find that there is no hesitation before her answer, and I feel ten feet tall knowing this woman is mine. Well, will hopefully be mine soon.

A/N: Can you guys even imagine a geeky/soft-spoken Edward? I know, it is definitely hard to believe haha. Next chapter will be cute, I promise! Also, I'll be posting another Bella POV soon on my blog, so go follow so you can see all my Bella POV updates!

Song- "I Miss You" by blink-182