A/N: Thanks so much for all your wonderful thoughts.

We're getting there. ;)

Most characters belong to S. Meyer. The rest belong to me. All mistakes are mine as well.

Broken - Chapter 23

Somehow - and I had no clue how or why - I'd opened the door to my loft and wandered into a sort of semi-heaven. It was the type of heaven where dark-haired angels tread and slid ethereal arms around human shoulders before cradling faces in gauzy hands and feathering supple lips against long-forgotten fractured noses; so, perhaps it wasn't a semi-heaven after all. And even though I was the one holding the angel up in my arms, it was my eyes that fell shut in sweet surrender. Because in this bewildering corner of Utopia, I was putty in her hands; malleable, as if on this ridge of bliss, she was more than an angel; she was the very goddess whose hands shaped me.

"I'm sorry..I'm sorry..."

She murmured the words over and over, lips still brushing my nose and bathing me in pure warmth. Slowly reopening my eyes, I found both shed and unshed tears glimmering on her beautiful face and at the corners of her hypnotically dark eyes. When a tear skimmed her cheek and paused at the rim of her mouth, I wondered how an angel's tears tasted, and I leaned in closer...

A blaring car horn and screeching tires pierced the borders of this strange Eden and annihilated it as suddenly as it appeared, returning it to its former use as a simple hallway...

However, the angel remained; so, again: semi-heaven.

'I'm sorry I broke your nose.'

'I'm sorry...'

'I'm sorry...'

If my quick conjectures were correct, Bella had now recalled much of the rest of That Day on her own. Unfortunately, that appeared to mean she felt guilty now, over something she shouldn't, and for something over which she'd had no control. What was more, in my state of self-imposed hypnosis, I'd been close to responding to her unnecessary apologies in a manner that would've gotten me slapped - and with good cause.

Blinking out of my disorientation, I squeezed my eyes shut and loosened the mind-blowing yet excessively tight grip I had on Bella's hips. Then, refocusing, I cautiously set her down and took a step back.

"I..." I swallowed hard, "I apologize. I-"

"No, Edward-"

"Shit, and I forgot about your foot."

"I'm fine, I'm fine. I can walk."

"And I've got you standing out here." I raked a frustrated hand through my hair. "I'm sorry, do you want to come in?"

Bella offered me a soft smile. "If it's okay."

"Of course it is."

As she limped by, I stood stoically to the side, hands curled in fists to keep them from reaching for her because, despite her injured foot, I was pretty sure she wouldn't appreciate being hauled over my shoulder. When she stepped in, I shut the door and followed her, hands dug deep in my pockets. Meanwhile, Bella's eyes swept the loft, while my eyes struggled to believe the veracity of what they saw.

Obviously, my ability to extrapolate was, at that moment, nil.

More than a few seconds went by. Bella continued inspecting the loft. The converted warehouse was simple - just a large, open space - but whenever I was home in New York, I loved being home. It was clean and sparse. Unlike my sister and her ostentatious, midtown high-rise, I'd furnished my place more with necessity and functionality in mind rather than with over-the-top decor. Kept true to its origins, authentic brickwork lay exposed in places, and the wood-beamed ceilings exposed some of the piping. Wooden pillars separated one space's function from the other, while a winding, narrow stairwell crafted of the building's native steelworks led up to the bedroom. However, my favorite part of the loft were the large, industrial-sized windows overlooking downtown's pre-war architecture mixed with modern high-rises along with a peek of the Freedom Tower. In spite of my mental upheaval, I caught myself smiling when the windows appeared to hold Bella's attention. The possibility that she might enjoy the view from my loft as much as I did infused me with a ridiculous amount of warmth.

Nonetheless, there was only so long my mind could distract itself from the variety of questions demanding answers, while also ignoring the fact that Bella was still standing on an obviously injured foot.

I cleared my throat. "Bella…"

Bella turned and offered me a sheepish smile. "Sorry. I got distracted." With one more hasty glance around the loft, her eyes returned to me. "It's really a great place."

"It's pretty basic, but thanks."

"I didn't mean to barge in on you like this." Her eyes flashed to the desk, where she'd apparently noted my laptop's glowing screen. "It looks like you were in the middle of-"

"No, no." I waved a hand dismissively. "I mean, I was working, but-" With a furtive breath, I dared a step closer to her. "Come on, Bella. You have to get off that foot."

When she didn't protest, I dared yet another step and another, and with the lightest touch to guide her, I led us to the lone sectional in the apartment. As she took a seat, I carried on a split second, mental debate on which issue here took precedence: her injury or her reason for showing up at my door?

Kneeling on the wooden floor before her, I wrapped my hands around the boot on her foot.

"Edward, what are you doing?"

The slight note of apprehension in her tone gave me pause. Looking up, I offered her a grin meant to set her at ease.

"An examination. I'm a doctor, remember?"

"You're not a medical doctor, and my ankle doesn't have the flu."

The feigned scowl I attempted swiftly morphed into a genuine chuckle.

"Smartass. I'm better than a medical doctor. So...what happened Bella?"

"A lot. It's a long story."

That statement merited a raised eyebrow, at the very least. "Is it now?"

"Mhm. Do you…" she sighed, "I know you're busy, but do you have a few moments so I can share it with you?"

Snorting, I shook my head. "Isabella Swan, you know damn well I'll always have time for you – and your long stories. But may I examine your foot first?"

"It's already been examined, Edward."

"Humor me. Please."

Bella swallowed...and relented with a smile and a nod. Gently, I pulled back the rows of Velcro fasteners holding the boot together. When they were all unfastened, I eased the boot off her foot slowly and carefully.

"It's a sprained ankle, not a bomb," said the woman seated on the sectional.

"Such a smartass," I breathed, making her chuckle.

Setting the boot aside, I peeled off the hospital-grade gray sock the hospital had apparently given Bella. As I cradled her bare foot, there was a part of me that wanted to laugh despite the fact that I was holding Bella's injured foot - a pristine, smooth, and sweetly-shaped foot, if not for the swelling. It was the part of me that realized how ruthlessly hard and loud Emmett would laugh at me if I ever told him how...sexy I found her foot.

"I've meant to go for a pedicure."

Eyes still firmly on her foot, I chuckled under my breath because she had no idea where my thoughts wandered.

"Never what I expect," I mumbled. Taking a closer look, I cautiously moved her foot from side to side. "Painted toes or not, the ankle doesn't look too bad, thank goodness," I pronounced.

"Thank you, Doctor Cullen, but I did tell you that," she pointed out.

I shook my head at her continued teasing and placed two fingers just below her ankle, examining for fractures.

"Does that hurt?"

When Bella didn't immediately reply, I panicked and looked up. She didn't appear to be in pain, more...dazed. Her throat moved as she swallowed hard.

"I went to the hospital, Edward. It's fine; just sprained. And no…" she added, dropping her voice, "it doesn't hurt when you touch me like that."

I managed an erratic nod because there was something obscurely indecipherable in Bella's expression, yet something in the way she held me locked in her gaze that felt vaguely familiar...something from back in those days when I thought...when I allowed myself to believe that perhaps Bella and I might someday...

Fuck.

What was I doing?

What the hell was I thinking?

Bella had a boyfriend. She'd confirmed it, and more than once. Less than forty-eight hours earlier, as a matter of fact, she'd told me, in no uncertain terms, that she "couldn't," because there was "someone." Yet, here I was, deluding myself into seeing shit in front of me that wasn't there, instead of taking care of her injured foot.

When would I ever learn to give up, to silence that stupid voice inside me who neglected evidence in favor of emotions, when it came to her?

Easing her foot gently on the floor, I stood and headed swiftly toward the staircase.

"Hold on; I'll be right back."

"Edward?"

I could hear the puzzlement in her voice, but I took the steps two at a time, sprinted into the bathroom and flipped on the lights. There, I fisted my hair in both hands and scowled at the image in the mirror.

"The hell is your problem, man? Get a hold of yourself. Take care of her foot, find out how and why she arrived at your doorstep, what you can do to ease her mind, then, make sure she makes it back home safely - to her boyfriend," I chuckled bitterly. "That's it. That's your job, and be grateful for that much, at least." With a handful of deep-dive level breaths, I yanked open the medicine cabinet.

When I descended the steps with most of the necessary implements, I caught Bella's still bemused eyes on me. "Just one more thing." I offered her a quick wink as I sprinted into the kitchen and pulled open the fridge.

"Do you want a drink, Bella?"

"No, thanks. I'm...good?"

Retrieving the last item from the freezer, I returned to the living room and took a seat next to Bella. Then, I picked up a pillow and placed it in the space between us, gently tapping her knee.

"Come on; lift that foot."

A line appeared between Bella's brows. "Edward, that's not-"

"I'm sure they told you to keep the foot iced, compressed, and elevated, correct?"

"Yes," she admitted, "but-"

"Then turn around, and lift your foot."

She didn't budge. Of course not. To someone as faithful as Bella was to...to Mack, her injured foot on my lap would understandably feel wildly inappropriate. With a deep breath, I picked up the items at my side and held them up for Bella's careful inspection.

"It's a compression bandage and an ice pack. You said you wanted to talk, and you said it was a long story, so I figured the bandage might be more comfortable rather than the heavy boot for now, and you can elevate that foot and get your twenty minutes of ice in as well. That's it," I said stiffly. "That's all the doctor in me, whether medical or not, is trying to do here."

"Edward, I'm not trying to imply…" With a heavy sigh, she nodded. "Okay. Thank you. I appreciate it."

"No problem."

Silently, I set to work, wrapping the bandage tightly yet carefully around Bella's ankle. But despite her acquiescence, her discomfort was palpable. Yet, as painful as it was for me to acknowledge, how could I fault her for being so resolute in her fidelity...even when that fidelity wasn't to me? Swallowing thickly, I forced out the words which would speed up her departure.

"So…we can begin whenever you want, Bella. It's getting late, and-"

"I'm sorry; I know you have work to do."

My hands froze around her ankle as I looked up and met Bella's gaze. "That's not at all what I was going to say. I was going to say, it's getting late, and I'm sure you have…" - Mack - "people waiting for you. If it were me waiting for you, I wouldn't want you wandering around with an injured ankle." I returned to wrapping her ankle.

For another minute or so, Bella remained silent.

"I know I said I had a long story to tell," she eventually whispered, "but can we please finish your part first?"

"The hospital," I murmured.

"I mean before that. Edward, why didn't you tell me I broke your nose?"

I sighed. "What would've been the point, Bella?"

"The point would've been that you promised me the whole story, yet you still kept that to yourself."

"Again, for what, Bella? What would've been the point of mentioning that part?"

The mere thought of being at the receiving end of more of her guilt and sympathy made my jaw clench and my nostrils flare. With the bandaging complete, I secured the ends with fasteners and picked up the ice pack, taking out my frustration on it and on my kneecap. Once activated, I gently pressed the ice pack against Bella's ankle and trapped it between her foot and the sectional's back cushion. Only then did I trust myself enough to meet her eyes.

"So that you could show up at my doorstep," I hissed, "and apologize for breaking my nose? Do you think I ever wanted that, Bella – an apology from you?"

"I didn't only-"

"You want to hear something nuts," I scowled, "something I actually did tell you once, but I did it in the most fucked up, clandestine way; made my confessions while taking full advantage of the fact that you didn't remember; that you had no idea what I was confessing. What an asshole," I snorted self-deprecatingly, "and again, I'm so sorry for all my bullshit, but here it is now that you do remember: I would've been honored to receive that fracture at your hands that day had I been of any use to you, had I been able to keep you from-"

"But you were, Edward."

I shook my head, refusing to accept any more of her pity; of her sympathy.

"It was when Alice spewed that bullshit about keeping things friendly," I spat. "I almost had you, almost calmed you enough to pull you out of there, away from that scene. But then she…and you went for her again, and Jasper grabbed you, and I let go of you to grab him, and…" I exhaled hard.

"And I hit you with my elbow." When she offered me a heart-breakingly pained smile, I had to look away, distracting myself with unnecessary adjustments to the icepack.

"When the cops came, you were in the worst of it."

"Jesus, Edward, don't tell me you blame yourself for that? It was an anxiety attack. There was nothing-"

"Had I held on to you-" I hissed insistently.

"I broke your nose. You were probably bleeding all over the place. And God, how did you even keep that out of the police report?"

My heart pounded. Unnecessarily, I ensured that the ice pack was secure. "You got it?"

When Bella nodded, I stood and quickly strode to the windows. Outside, the city's many lights illuminated the darkened streets. They were like a lighthouse's foghorn, there to guide everyone home. My breaths erupted fast and hard, turning into condensation against the large, cool windows. I traced their erratic pattern.

"When the cops came, I heard them say they were taking you to the hospital…and when another cop tried to take my statement, I told him to fuck off and grabbed a cab to the hospital."

"You didn't even get that fracture examined right away, did you?" Bella choked.

There was no need to reply. She knew the answer.

"I remember you with me," she continued in a whisper, "only vague snippets, but…I remember feeling you there with me."

I squeezed my eyes shut and swallowed thickly before exhaling through narrowed lips.

"I found you in triage. They'd sedated you, but you were in and out of it, and you were…frightened." - 'Stay with me, Edward...' - "So, I stayed with you for a bit," - my voice shook with the memory - "until you went under completely, and then I left. It was just so…" I hung my head and shook it from side to side.

"I was a mess."

In three strides, I returned to her, dropped to my knees, and fisted the cushions on either side of her. When I looked up, Bella took me in through wildly bewildered eyes.

"Jesus, don't you see yet? Not you, Bella," I stressed. "The fucking situation was a mess. My father works at that hospital, so it also happened to be where they took Alice to make sure she and…the baby were okay even though you didn't even touch her! I mean, the fucking unfairness. You didn't even touch her!"

As frenzied as I felt, and as equally confused as she'd appeared just half a minute earlier, now Bella held my gaze steadily, with the calm...with the serenity of someone who abruptly understood so much more than she'd understood just moments ago.

"Life's not fair, Edward." She offered me a wistful smile. "But neither is it unfair. I'm only now really…really beginning to see that. Edward, I damaged an underage child's property," her smile turned rueful, "I defaced public property, I threatened a pregnant woman, I physically assaulted my husband, and…."

She swallowed, and when she stretched out a hand and cupped my cheek, my eyes fell shut, branded my her touch, as I'd always be. Slowly, I lifted my hand and wrapped it around hers.

"And I fractured the nose of the only person there who tried to help me. I had a breakdown, and because of that breakdown, I learned to cope, and I reclaimed my life, and I met a host of amazing people. I met...and re-met you."

I swallowed past the lump in my throat and reopened my eyes. "You are amazing. You broke my nose, but I will never, ever," I choked, "regret being there for you if my presence offered you the least bit comfort. So, if that's the case, then the broken...nose...was more than worth it."

A solitary tear skimmed Bella's smooth cheek, and her next words erupted in a strangled whisper. "And there…is the biggest metaphor of all, because we're not talking about your nose at all, are we?"

Snorting, I shook my head. There was no point in denying it. Bella saw through me. She knew my absolute truth. For an eternal moment, we held one another's gaze, her hand still cradling my cheek. When she leaned in slowly, her eyes on mine until she was too close...her lips brushed my lips and it was that same semi-heaven.

And yes, I half feared my heart might explode right out of my chest. But Jesus, I did not want her guilt nor her sympathy. As warm as her lips felt, as soft, as perfect...as much as I loved her and needed her, I would never want those emotions to be the ones that led her lips to mine. Yet, that hopeful part of me, the one I'd never managed to completely suppress now stubbornly shouted in my head...

"Because you broke my nose?" I breathed against her mouth.

"No," she exhaled, lips still brushing mine, feathering agonizingly sweet yet heartrending kisses back and forth. "No."

The hopeful voice shouted louder, begged to be allowed to believe. In turn, the cognitive part of me still functioning, the one who refused to be governed by bare, primitive longing begged it to understand...to focus...to recall that there were more factors, more individuals involved here than just Bella and me. It took greater mental and physical fortitude than I'd ever imagined using to overrule that primal instinct...and pull away from Bella's kisses.

I held her gaze steadily. "What about your boyfriend?"

Bella sighed, but then, something akin to a teasing smile lit up her face. "Do you want to know what my book is about?"

Once again, that wasn't what I'd expected from her at that moment - not at all. Nevertheless, for years, I'd ached to know what Bella wrote whenever I encountered her, hands moving swiftly over her keyboard in rapt focus in that coffee shop. There was no way I could do anything but nod.

"It's a complicated plotline," she dove in, "but basically, it revolves around star-crossed lovers. However, by the end of the story, she saves the world, and they're no longer star-crossed. Edward, I wasn't ready for you two years ago," she cried quietly, "and I wasn't ready for you a year ago either."

"I know," I whispered, my voice coming out strangled. "And I'm sorry about how I-"

Turning over the hand she still held against my cheek, Bella weaved her fingers through mine and squeezed.

"You've already apologized, Edward, and while I maintain you should've told me, it was a fucked-up situation all around. But I wasn't ready, and it wouldn't have worked out whether you'd told me or not."

I nodded, because yes, I'd figured that last part out a while ago, through my own painful dreams. Yet, that damn voice kept shouting, blaring with something like an air horn into every corner of my mind; threatening to drown out sanity, to obliterate sense...and every doubt along with it as it claimed that...there was more.

"And now?" I asked shakily, terrified to hope yet possibly even more terrified not to.

"Now…now, I trust myself in a way I didn't then. And because I trust myself, I can trust you, and I can see…I can see…" As she searched for the next words, the right words, Bella's gaze swept past my shoulder, over to the windows behind me. All the while, my pulse raced, my temples throbbed. "I see that just as you extrapolated and fell in love with me That Day, on the day a year ago when I met you – or rather, re-met you," she smiled, "some part of me remembered that you were the one there for me in that lobby and in the hospital. It's why I opened up to you in a way I hadn't opened up to anyone." When she met my eyes, I read the next words in her gaze even before she spoke them, and I drew in a deep, lungful of air.

"It was because I was half in love with you as well, Edward."

I exhaled heavily, in utter and total surrender. "Bella..."

"I was half in love with you, but I wasn't ready for you."

The rest of the declaration came out through quiet tears intermingled with smiles and erratic breaths - on both sides.

"We were star-crossed, and subconsciously, I knew it, so it poured out in the words I wrote. And afterward, I buried your file, but I couldn't erase it. So, I tried replacing it with another file…" Bella shook her head. "Edward, Brady and I broke up yesterday."

Brady?

My brow furrowed. "Brady?"

"My boyfriend. My ex-boyfriend," she clarified.

For a brief fraction of a moment, I acknowledged the fact that somewhere, I'd obviously gotten something massively wrong. But it was an extremely brief fraction of a moment because the entire observation was moot; Brady, Mack, whatever his name was, was now...an ex-boyfriend.

"Brady," I murmured almost to myself. Then, I looked up. "You broke up."

Bella nodded slowly, holding my gaze, her dark eyes sparkling with happiness and with those shed and unshed tears.

And on the heels of that quick moment of clarification, another observation...the most important realization of all completely freed the voice struggling in my head. The voice shouted; he erupted in unmitigated joy; he exploded in boundless...unimaginable...everlasting...and mind-blowing triumph into every crevice in my system.

"And…you love me."

"Yes, Edward. Yes." The words expelled themselves from Bella forcefully, as if relieved to finally be let loose as well, simultaneously spoken with a sense of pure confidence and contentment that somehow seemed to match my own. "I love you."

I love you.

"Then, that's all I need to hear."

Pushing myself off my knees, I hovered above her for a fraction of a moment. Yet, it was one of those forever moments, one of those unforgettable moments, while I waited for her nod. And when she did, in that portion of my mind that would always...always place her first, I made sure I nudged her sweet foot aside before I crushed my mouth to hers.

When I did, we were no longer in merely a semi-heaven.

A/N: Thoughts?

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