A/N: Thanks so much for all your wonderful thoughts?

Most characters belong to S. Meyer. The rest belong to me. All mistakes are mine as well.

Broken - Chapter 31

It was a week until Christmas, and I was in the office typing up initial findings of the success of the H5N2 antiviral to be presented at the World Health Organization's annual summit in February of the following year. It would be a work-in-progress until we had a complete picture of how the H5N2 antiviral would work in the long run.

With the success of Batch 1 (B1), in mid-December, the CDC recommended that the level of Influenza Pandemic Alert (IPA) hold steady at Phase 4 - epidemiological data demonstrating human-to-human transmission and the ability of the virus to cause community-level outbreaks. As of mid-December, the CDC did not believe it necessary to raise the IPA to Phase 5 - Pandemic Imminent; activation of Emergency Operations Centers. The CDC recommended that treatment be prioritized for people with severe respiratory illnesses, people at high risk for complications from seasonal influenza, children under five, pregnant women, people with chronic medical conditions, and people sixty-five years and older. Initial findings showed that most of the recipients of the now out-of-supply B1 anti-H5N2 fell within these parameters. However, after distribution and administration of B1 anti-H5N2, initial findings also demonstrated that 61% of patients admitted with H5N2 now fall outside of these parameters. With the upcoming distribution of B2 anti-H5N2, a vigorous campaign is underway, aimed toward the rest of the population and stressing the importance of-

Scrubbing my eyes wrists, I decided to give my vision a break and turned away from the laptop toward the windows. It was a typical winter day in the Northeast. The skies were a drab color somewhere between white and gray, a shade that washed every building, tree, street, and person underneath it into pale likenesses of themselves. Still, I would've preferred to have been out there, with the rest of my team, rather than in here writing and rewriting this report.

Em and the rest of the team were out in the field, providing guidance for clinicians in prescribing and administering the H5N2 antiviral. Later that morning, I was scheduled for another interview with...Selena? Sabrina? Serena? - the TV journalist, in an attempt to ramp up our publicity campaign in advance of the availability of the anti-viral's second batch, as well as it's necessity.

However, as far as I was concerned, I would've been of better use out in the field, gathering information first-hand, the way an epidemiologist was supposed to do. Then again, the trade-off had been worth it. Despite not falling under the parameters for the first batch of the anti-viral, Bella had been vaccinated. With current studies finding that those outside of the parameters were the majority of those contracting the virus now, it was a huge relief to know Bella would be safe regardless.

At the thought of Bella, I smiled to myself, and though my eyes were on the colorless view of the city morning, what I saw were her rich brown eyes, sparkling, excited. Her book tour was well underway, and from our nightly talks, I knew they were going well. Her readings were packed with eager readers and potential book buyers. Lacking an actual book, they asked her to sign their book reading announcements, their journals, or when nothing else was handy, their napkins. She was meeting people. She was traveling, which was something she'd always wanted to do. She was spending time with her father, who she loved. She was having a great time. Bella's career as a published writer was flourishing.

But she was shaking plenty of hands and exposed to a frightening number of germs, and no, I couldn't regret in the least having given her my booster, even if it meant being stuck in the office while the others did the real work. If she were to get sick, at best, it would throw a wrench into her lucrative and busy schedule while she took the time to recover. At worst...

I wouldn't even allow myself to finish that thought. However, I must've shaken my head somewhat vigorously, because it brought on a moderate coughing fit. As I covered my mouth tightly with my forearm, I turned away from the window and banged my palm repeatedly on my desk, which is how Emmett found me when he walked into my office - without knocking, of course. Then, he stood there, arms crossed against his chest until my coughs subsided.

"You sound great."

"It's just a cough." I cleared my throat, at the same time spotting one of my Christmas presents to Bella, which was resting on my desk and within clear view. Furtively, I pulled it behind the desk and opened my top drawer, storing the small box within while simultaneously pulling out a can of Lysol and hand sanitizer.

"Panita, when was the last time you had a cough? I can't even remember that far back. And yeah, please. Disinfect this office. I just came from donning mask and suit while out in the field with some serious shit. I don't need your germs to boot."

"I've got a great solution for that," I said pointedly.

Emmett simply laughed and took a seat.

"Yeah, so do I. Go home and start your Christmas break early."

"Just because I may not be out in the field with the rest of you doesn't mean there isn't a shitload of work to be done."

Emmett shook his head. "Maybe Bella can convince you to take it easy once in a while once she's back. Anyway, what was that?" He jerked his jaw toward the top drawer of my desk.

Inanely, I tried to play stupid. "What was what?"

"The blue box you just shoved in your desk drawer."

"None of your business."

"Was that a Christmas present?"

"Maybe."

He grinned. "For me?"

I snorted and coughed again. "It's for Bella."

"Can I see?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because it's for Bella, not for you."

"So what? I'm sure she wouldn't mind. She likes me!"

I rolled my eyes. "I don't want you to see it. At least, not until I give it to her."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to show it to you," I said, my tone admittedly tinged with incredulity that he'd need it explained. "Dude, it's from me to my girlfriend."

"Oh, brother." He propped his feet on the desk's edge and laced his fingers behind his head. "This Edward-has-a-girlfriend-he's-actually-completely-into-for-once business is starting to grow old, especially now that I've grown bored of teasing you. Now, it's just a reminder that I'll be a third-wheel every time we go out once Bella returns from her book tour."

I quirked an eyebrow and waited.

"I won't even be allowed to be the third-wheel, will I?"

I chuckled heartily and coughed again, covering my mouth once more, and then once again sanitizing my hands and the area around us.

"I mean, you can hang out with us here and there, Em, but when Bella returns to stay, in late March, I'm pretty sure we're going to want to spend some quality couple time together."

When he pursed his lips peevishly, I chuckled again and threw him a figurative bone.

"Em, when we get a group of friends together, you'll be more than welcome to be one of those friends."

Despite the concession, Emmett's eyes grew wide, and he jerked back his head as if I'd thrown a punch at him.

"You mean I'm being relegated to merely 'group of friends' outings? Damn." He dropped his feet back to the floor and shook his head. "I guess it's true what they say: Cuando tu panita se enamora, he totally forgets who used to carry his drunk-ass home."

"First of all, that was only once, and it was years ago. Second, seriously, you're jealous of my relationship with Bella here?"

"No. Of course not." He shrugged his shoulders and glared at the window behind me.

"Em," I snorted, "I'm going to remind you of this day here when you meet someone."

"Yeah, yeah. Whenever that'll be," he muttered and waved a hand dismissively. For a few speechless seconds, I almost felt bad for him...until I noted the slight twitch of his lips followed by the vibrations of his shoulders he couldn't completely suppress along with his suppressed laughter. When I threw the stapler at him, he blocked it and gave up trying to control his amusement.

"Grew tired of teasing me my ass," I muttered, while he cackled wildly.

"You're just so gullible."

When I laughed too, I ended up coughing.

Emmett's chortles subsided. He held my gaze. "So, how's the forced quarantine going for you? Did you have fun trying to read my notes?"

"You mean your chicken scratchings?" I scowled. "The report is going fine. I'm having loads of fun writing down everyone else's findings."

He chuckled. "No one but yourself to blame for that. And I was hoping to give you the vaccine today, but with that cough lingering...you know you can't be vaccinated with that cough."

"It's fine." I waved away his concern. "Give it to someone else."

Emmett pursed his lips. "I'm going to have to do so. But you should take it before you travel next week, and at this point, we don't know exactly when the next batch'll be in."

"Emmett, this'll be gone in a couple of days, and I don't leave for Miami to meet Bella until Christmas Eve late morning. If the next batch is in by then-"

"This is why you should've taken your dose instead of-"

"I had to give it to her."

"That's debatable."

"It's not. Not at all. Do you have any idea how much traveling she's doing? She's going from city to city, and performing readings on almost a daily basis. Though they're going wonderfully, imagine the toll on her immune system put on by all that traveling and stress, despite her daily yoga and exercising? And she's on the West Coast, Em, where the virus is more prevalent. Had she come in contact with it and not been protected..." Again, I shook my head.

"Don't even let your thoughts wander there."

"I don't."

"Ed, she's a healthy woman. The virus may have knocked her on her butt for a few, but-"

"It's the fever that's unpredictable, Emmett. That's why you and I and the rest of our team spent months developing this anti-viral. For all intents and purposes, yeah, H5N2 is simply a nasty strain of the flu that knocks you out a bit harder than other strains, but it's the massively high fevers this strain causes, in random patients, that kept all of us going nonstop for months, searching for an anti-viral. Because with a fever like that, there's no knowing what damage it'll cause."

Emmett watched me for a few moments before sighing. "You're right; it is the fever that makes this strain so dangerous, and I understand why you gave Bella your booster, but you can't deny that now it's left you exposed."

"Exposed to what?" I chuckled. "Straining my eyes on the laptop while I take care of all second-hand analysis here in the office? Like I said, I'll be fine, and in a few days, when this cough is gone," I coughed and shrugged, "I'll get my booster."

OOOOO

"So, he pretends to mope around now, complaining about being the last one in the group without a significant other, pretending to be jealous of you, and acting offended when I tell him that he'll only be allowed to hang around with us when we're out in a group setting."

All the while, Bella laughed hard. She was in Dallas that evening, after working her way up and down the west coast. Now, she was working her way east. It was late at night for both of us despite the one hour time difference in our zones. We'd been on Facetime for a couple of hours discussing everything under the sun: her latest book reading, the latest findings on the antiviral - though I didn't mention the fact that I hadn't been able to receive my own vaccine yet.

We were both in our respective beds with our laptops propped on our knees as we leaned against our headboards. And while I was in a pair of clean jogging shorts, Bella wore her own sleep shorts, much shorter than mine and with a matching tank top through which I could almost make out the sweet pink shade of her erect nipples. Every few minutes, my eyes would helplessly wander down to them, and I'd remember...

"He's such a clown," she said, forcing my attention back to the much less interesting subject of Emmett. "I can't wait to introduce him to Rose. I can totally see them hitting it off, though at first, they'll probably pretend to hate one another."

"It's a shame she's married," I grumbled. "She might've been able to get him off my back."

"Yeah, but she's married and a lesbian," Bella grinned.

"True," I chuckled.

"Though my roommate Makenna is single, but she's sworn off men until she's exactly forty. Her past couple of relationships have been pretty disastrous, and the last thing she's looking for right now is a relationship."

"Emmett will just have to deal with group get-togethers then," I smirked.

Bella laughed again. She looked so...relaxed and carefree, and God, I loved seeing her like that.

"Oh, and speaking of Rose, guess who texted me earlier today?"

"Yeah," Bella grinned, "she said she was going to text you to make sure you knew you're the plus one in the invites she sent out for her baby shower in January."

"It's a good thing they've gotten over their dislike of me." I meant to laugh, but it came out as a cough. "Makenna, Rose, and even Rose's wife, Vera are all my social media friends as well."

Bella frowned. "Edward, baby, you've got a cold?"

"Oh. It's nothing. Just a bit of a cough."

Her frown deepened. "Don't let it turn into a bigger one. Take care of yourself the way you're always telling me to take care of myself."

"I will, my love. Besides, it's par for the course for this time of year, though it's been years since I've had a cold."

"Yeah, I've woken up the past few mornings feeling like I'm coming down with something too. But then I feel fine. And today I woke up feeling just fine anyway."

I raised a brow. "Are you taking your vitamins?"

"Yes, Doctor Cullen," she laughed. "I shouldn't even have mentioned it. Do you see what I mean? Anyway, yes, Rose and her wife are wonderful. And it was never you who they disliked, baby; it was the unresolved tension of the situation surrounding us. It's very similar to..." she swallowed, "it's very similar to why I couldn't be around you once I found out who you were. As much as I cared about you, that unresolved issues between us literally made me sick to my stomach."

"I'm so sorry," I whispered.

Bella chuckled. "I'm not saying it for you to apologize. I'm just saying sometimes, with time and a few painful discussions, you can resolve those tensions that make it uncomfortable to be around some people."

For a handful of seconds, my mind wandered. This time, not to the sheer material of her tank top, but to those relationships in my life which had been ripe with tension ever since...well, ever since I could remember.

"Edward? Where'd you go?"

Blinking out of those useless thoughts, I smiled at the woman on the screen before me. "I'm right here, Bella."

She smiled softly in return, and when she sighed, my eyes wandered for a second. "I wish you were really here. Or I was really there."

"I miss you," I breathed. "I can't wait to see you next week."

"Me neither. And then we'll have a few weeks together through mid-January before I've got to leave for Europe..."

"And then I'll meet you in London in late February. Don't get lost around Europe before I get there. I know your geographical skills are nothing to brag about."

She laughed. "You're an ass. Besides, I've been studying geography, and now I know that England and the U.K. are actually the same place. So there."

"They're not actually the same place, per se, but you're getting closer, so I'll let it go for now and explain the difference in person when we're together."

She scowled at me through the phone while I laughed and coughed.

"God, Bella, if I had you here right now…"

"Tell me. Tell me what you'd do to me if you had me there right now." She whispered the words huskily.

I raised an eyebrow. "You want me to tell you?"

"Yes."

Swallowing thickly, my eyes wandered for a second before I returned them to Bella's dark, impish gaze.

"With how much detail?"

"With exquisite detail, Edward."

Heart racing and blood pumping into every extremity now, I exhaled through narrowed lips before beginning.

"If I had you here right now, I'd pull off every last piece of your clothing, and I'd kiss and lick you from the top of your head to the tips of your toes and everywhere in between. I'd lick you 'til you were so wet…so wet you'd beg to have me inside you."

Bella shut her eyes tight and squirmed over her hotel bed. "Mmm. Oh God, Edward." She fisted her hair. "I remember how good you feel inside me."

"God, you look so beautiful," I said in a strangled whisper. "I remember how good you move…how good you feel wrapped around me...how good you taste..."

When her eyes popped open, the undisguised longing and lust swirling in them made my breath catch in my throat.

"Or maybe you'd be the one begging, Edward, after I brushed my lips back and forth across your ink and let my tongue dart over that strength and health."

I chuckled at her description of my tattoo, but as she continued, my chuckles died away.

"Then I'd run my tongue down your body…"

"Mmm. That sounds really good." My hips bucked up and down, moving the laptop along with me.

"…past your stomach…"

"Oh yeah?" Painfully hard now, my hand began wandering. "How far past my stomach?"

"All the way 'til I reached your swollen tip, and I'd give it a few darts of my tongue…"

"Holy fuck." I shut my eyes and grunted deep in my throat.

"…then swirl my tongue around and around a bit before I gave you one…long…lick…from tip to base…"

By this point, though Bella couldn't see, I had my hand wrapped around myself, moving it up and down and pretending...

"…and I'd keep licking up and down…up and down that long, hard length…"

"Oh, fuck, Bella. Yeah, baby. I'd beg. I'd beg you to take me deep."

"I'd take you so deep...and I'd suck…and suck…"

When she started laughing, my eyes popped open.

"Bella, that's just plain evil. You've got me so hard right now, I'm about to explode."

She stopped laughing and quirked an eyebrow before licking her top lip, and I don't know how I didn't detonate right then.

"Oh yeah? Show me."

I only hesitated for a fraction of a second before replying. "Only if you show me in return."

OOOOO

Three days before Christmas, I met my mom and JJ at the park by my parent's Upper West Side apartment. By then, my cough had subsided enough so that Emmett and I had made plans to meet at the CDC labs as soon as the new batch of the H5N2 antiviral was ready. I was anxious to get to Miami; not only because I missed Bella like crazy, but because I got the feeling she wasn't taking care of herself the way she should. She kept complaining about feeling off, which had me a bit concerned.

That afternoon, my mind wasn't on the antiviral or on my subsiding cough.

"So, she took him back after that entire clusterfuck he created with her here, and with Bella in Forks."

We sat at a park bench, watching JJ run around just a few short feet away. Esme shrugged in reply to my comment, but though it hadn't really been a question, her lack of a real answer frustrated me, even if I wasn't sure why.

I sat with my hands laced together on top of my thighs, and I snorted, shaking my head as I kept my eyes on JJ. And I meant to keep my thoughts to myself until Esme attempted to spin the entire thing into a positive.

"Well, perhaps Alice won't be so...upset now, and the next time she and Bella meet."

I flashed my eyes tightly to my mother. "I'm keeping her venomous mouth away from Bella for as long as possible. And him; I don't even know what's going to happen the next time I see him."

"Edward, if she took Jasper back, and you're with Bella, there will come a time when you're all- when we're all in the same room."

"Not if I can help it. I won't subject Bella to that. To them. To..."

"To all of us?"

Glaring straight ahead again, I made no reply.

"Honey, it's unavoidable."

This time, when I spoke, I couldn't disguise the sharp edge in my voice.

"Well then, I'll delay it for as long as possible. She's a strong woman, Mom, she is. She's so damn brave she leaves me in awe half the time. I think it was her bravery, more than anything that day, instead of...anyway, the point is, there are things and people no one should be subjected to, no matter how strong or brave you are, namely the woman who stole your husband and forced you into jail and mandatory therapy."

For a few minutes, my mom remained silent. Meanwhile, JJ was now hitching those short legs over the toddler-sized geo-dome climber, while another little boy watched him.

"Take it easy, buddy," I called out. "You need help?"

"No!" he yelled back. "I big boy, Uncle Edwahd!"

I chuckled. "I know you are, little man."

"What does Bella say about all this?" Esme asked.

I drew in a deep breath and exhaled it into the cold air, watching my breaths swirl around me. "Like you, she says an eventual family reunion," I smirked, "is pretty much unavoidable. It doesn't mean I..."

I trailed off. The fact was, after what happened with Jasper a few weeks earlier, I knew Bella finally had full closure in regards to him. Jasper was an asshole, but he was also weak-minded and one-dimensional. He was, for all intents and purposes, an annoying, overgrown gnat, who fed just a minuscule amount of blood at a time. Certainly, an overgrown gnat was an insect to watch out for, as even that minuscule loss of blood over time had the potential to sicken a body, not to mention the diseases a gnat carried. However, between an overgrown gnat or a virus that hit you full force and knew just how to weaken every part of your system, I'd take the gnat.

Alice was a virus. And despite Bella's courage and her well-fought-for and well-earned mental well-being, I knew she was still wary of Alice; even more so...of JJ.

'Edward...we don't have to discuss it right now, because I know we just got together, and I know you have a lot going on in your life, and I'm going to have a lot going on soon too...but maybe...at some point in the future...would you consider adoption? Is that something you'd be open to?'

Yes, we'd touched on the subject before she left, but it wasn't a conversation we could delve into over phone calls or laptop screens.

As I watched my nephew singing and bouncing around from one toddler-sized playground amusement to another, with his little friend trailing behind, I smiled wistfully to myself. How could such small beings be such huge reminders? JJ wasn't merely a reminder of That Day to Bella; he was a reminder of what she...what we might never have. The last thing I wanted...the final straw I'd ever tolerate from my sister would be her taunting Bella the way she'd taunted me a few weeks earlier. If she ever did, I wouldn't be responsible for my-

"Edward?"

It took me a few moments to compose myself enough to be able to meet Esme's gaze. Even then, I could feel the stony mien of my expression, the wide flare of my nostrils, and the erratic breaths making my shoulders rise and fall heavily. I thought about what Bella said a few days earlier regarding the tension surrounding certain people. It wasn't always that you disliked those people. Sometimes, you cared about them immensely. But the unresolved tension there made it difficult to interact.

When my coffee lid popped off because I'd squeezed the cup so hard, and a few drops of coffee splattered onto my coat and lap, my mom gasped.

"Oh no!"

"It's fine. It's fine." My words were terse as I waved off her attempts to wipe my coat and swiped at it myself. "I've got it, Mom. But Jesus, she's so full of anger."

"Who? Bella?"

"No! Alice. Your stepdaughter." My eyes rose heatedly up to hers, and the rest spilled over just like the damn coffee in my paper cup. "Why the hell couldn't you and Dad have handled things differently with her? She's stuck in some form of limbo, and she blames everyone else for it. She blames Bella for it," I hissed, "taking it out on her as if somehow Bella ruined her life."

Esme held my gaze steadily. "She takes it out on you as well."

"I'm fine," I reiterated through gritted teeth. "I've dealt with her all my life. I can handle Alice. What I won't put up with is with her spouting more garbage at Bella simply because she's a goddamn mess, and no one," I said pointedly, "no one ever sat down with her, with either of us and explained..." I stopped.

"Edward, honey." My mom's voice broke.

'As much as I cared about you, the unresolved issues between us literally made me sick to my stomach.'

Raking a hand through my hair, I shook my head again. "Never mind. Never mind. I don't even know what I'm asking for or what I'm saying. I apologize, Mom."

"No, Edward, don't apologize." She drew in a deep breath. "You're right. You're so right, and I'm the one who's sorry. You're right; there are things we should've...things I should've explained to you once you were old enough-"

"Uncle Edwahd, come swing me high!" JJ ran toward the toddler swings across the playground.

"Hold on, buddy."

I sprinted to JJ and the swings, tamping down and swallowing back the frustration that had been building over the past few weeks...maybe even over the past few years.

How to deal with the unfortunate eventuality of not only exposing Bella to the dysfunctional family unit I belonged to, but of the possible negative effects they each had the potential to have on her had become a conundrum that kept me up at nights. I forced a grin as I caught up with JJ.

"Pick up, Uncle Edwahd! Pick up, pick up, pick up!" His eager command earned a genuine laugh followed by a raised brow from me.

"What's the magic word, kiddo?"

"Peas?"

"Close enough." I lifted him up and pushed his legs into the swing. The little boy who'd been playing with JJ slouched next to me. When I looked down, his mouth hung open, and he gazed up, looking drained and worn out, though as far as I'd noticed, he hadn't even climbed the geo-dome with JJ but merely watched him do it.

I offered him a grin. "Want to take a break on the swing?"

He offered me a small and wordless nod. Before picking him up, I searched the perimeter. His mom stood a few yards away. She was vaguely familiar, though in her winter gear, it was hard to tell. I called out over the city noise and wind.

"Is it okay if I put him in the swing?"

"Sure." As she replied, she simultaneously started walking toward us.

"Uncle Edwahd, swing me! Peas!"

"One second, buddy."

With his mom's approval, I lifted the boy up and pushed his legs into the swing. He sat with his arms hanging listlessly at his sides, and unlike JJ's kicking legs, limbs still as a statue's. Just as I started suspecting something might be wrong with the boy, I backed up, and the boy hacked a bark of a cough right into my face.

"Tommy! Cover your mouth, honey."

Tommy's mom reached me just as I wiped her son's snot and saliva off my face with the sleeve of my jacket.

"Oh my God, Edward. I'm so sorry."

The time necessary to clean myself off also served to give me a moment in which to compose myself - because I had some strange kid's germs literally clinging to me - and to try to figure out how this woman knew my name. Drawing in an internal breath, I looked at the woman.

She offered me an apologetic smile. "Lauren, remember? We met a few months ago at the Halloween Trunk-or-Treat?"

"Oh. Oh, yeah. Hey, Lauren."

"I'm so sorry, Edward," she repeated. "Tommy woke up with a bit of a cold, and I thought maybe some fresh air...honey, I've told you to cover your mouth."

The boy gazed at her through glazed eyes.

"Say sorry to Edward."

"It's fine."

Just then, Esme approached with the bottle of hand sanitizer she carried, which I took gratefully while wishing I could swallow it.

"Hello, Mrs. Cullen. How are you?"

"Hi, Lauren. Hi, Tommy. Looks like you're not feeling well, little guy."

Tommy coughed again and began crying.

"Maybe I should take him home."

"Uncle Edwahd, is Tommy sick?"

Lauren tried to remove Tommy from the swing, but she appeared to be struggling with a sack of potatoes.

"I think so, JJ. Here, I've got him," I offered, evading his face as I lifted him and handed him to his mother.

"Thanks." The boy hung limply in her arms.

"How long did you say he's been sick?"

"He hasn't been feeling too well since last night, but it seems to have grown worse in the past few hours."

"Lauren, did he receive his flu vaccine?"

"Yeah, months ago." She smiled. "I remember you said you worked for-"

"Did he receive the booster?"

She blinked. "Uh...yeah. I mean, I'd read stuff saying that it wasn't necessary, so I-"

"It is necessary. Did he receive it?"

"Yeah." She nodded fervently. "Yeah. Yeah, he did. Listen, I've got to go." She felt his forehead. "I should get him home."

"Or to the doctor," Esme said.

"Yeah. If he gets any worse, I definitely will. I apologize again," she began.

"It's fine. Just...I hope he feels better."

A/N: Thoughts?

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