Blake wandered down the long corridor alone, keeping her head bowed low, not even acknowledging the few Saviours she had passed along the way down here.
It was mid-morning and had turned out to be a warm and sunny day. Much different to the rain storms and showers the region had been privy to over the last few days, at least!
Blake had slept terribly last night, tossing and turning until the early hours, where she had finally drifted off into a dream-world filled with visions of David, of hungry snapping walkers, and hands pulling her down into the darkness….
She had woken, drenched with sweat. sitting bolt upright and scaring herself half to death, with her undraped window filled with a grey early morning light. She had then somehow managed to get in another hour or two before, finally waking again and making a move to drag herself up.
Blake had then promptly taken a cold shower in the communal stalls in the bathroom down the hall, before drying of her long caramel hair as best she could, slipping on a pair of black jeans and a grey t-shirt, and wrapping a wide black belt with a huge buckle around her curved hips.
And it was then that he had begun to pace, worrying at her lip with her teeth, thinking about last night….at what had happened between her and Negan.
Had it all been just a silly argument?
Because right now it felt like more than that. Worse than just a silly tiff, with both saying hurtful things to the other.
But Blake was stubborn, wounded by the Saviour's words….
At his blasé attitude towards Mia's death…
He had shown his true colours, and the last thing Blake was about to do, was fall back into his arms…to forgive him…
For how could she, after everything?
But the caramel-blonde woman knew that she could not stay cooped up in this room here forever.
Perhaps today she could leave the Sanctuary, take a pack full of stuff and just…. go…
But where?
She had burned all her bridges with Rick and the folks back in Alexandria now, and there really weren't many other safe places out there in this world anymore…
So she would try and get through today at least…think about it a while longer…hunger distracting her for the time being.
And so Blake had headed down towards the large canteen. Hoping to god she did not run into the dark-haired Saviour while she was down there.
For she was still upset. Angry at what had been said between them last night. She realised now that she was nothing more to Negan than a conquest. He hadn't cared about Mia, and he certainly hadn't cared about her!
Blake had just been a distraction to him, and that's all she would ever be. She could see that now.
And so, keeping her eyes on the ground now, Blake she turned the corner, heading into the large open-plan hall that acted as makeshift canteen for the Saviours.
Here, several long tables were set up, with plenty of people going to-and-fro today, carrying tray and bowls full of food.
But as Blake walked through the open door's leading inside, an eerie hush fell over the entire area almost instantly.
Blake immediately bristled, lifting her eyes for the first time since she had left her room, before giving a dry gulp.
Almost every single person in the room's eyes were on her now. But unlike yesterday, this was not reverence. None of them fell to their knees, but all of them kept on looking at her….like she was a some sort of mythical creature, a thing of legend here.
Had news of her and Negan's argument, really travelled that fast?
Probably, Blake pondered.
For what else was there to gossip about in this world? What else peaked everyone's interest here, but the private life of their leader and the woman he had had hanging from his arm these past couple of months, like a trophy? Appearing and reappearing here and there.
Angry and distraught tears pricked at her eyes now….bitter at what she had become here.
And so Blake, let her head fall again and walked silently forwards…feeling just like she had all those many weeks ago, when she had first come here with David…feeling so small and helpless…
She headed over to the end of the queue for food, and stood alone, a little away from the person before her, keeping herself to herself.
But even before the long line had moved more than a couple of feet, she felt someone suddenly part the crowd over to her left, striding purposely towards her.
She glanced up suddenly, thinking that it might have been Negan.
But it wasn't.
Instead, Blake's eyes fell upon the curly-haired Arat, who came to stop at her side, wearing a long checked shirt shucked over a black vest, with a large gun attached firmly to her belt.
"Hey," she said, her face fixed, neither smiling nor angry, giving Blake nothing.
Blake parted her lips, but didn't reply. Was she here with a message from Negan?
"I, uhhh," said Arat after asecond or two, looking almost a little awkward, shoving her hands into the front pockets of her jeans , before glancing Blake's way again. "I just wanted you to know, that what you did last night, to those fuckers that tried to hurt you…"
Blake's heart pounded in her chest. Arat had been there, of course, witnessing everything…
"…that took guts…so, I uhhh, don't, uhhhh, don't beat yourself up…about other things, ok?"
The curly-haired woman frowned a little and offered Blake a small important nod, before marching swiftly away, as Blake's green eyes followed her across the room.
Not in a million years had she ever expected that from Arat. From the woman oh-so loyal to Negan, there for every brutal moment of last night, from Blake bludgeoning Derek to death, to her and Negan's argument.
Blake sighed, before turning away once more, taking a step forwards in the line, and pondering Arat's words over and over inside her head.
Blake had eaten alone. That obviously, of course, wasn't a first for her, having been on her own many, many times at the tables at the Sanctuary before. But today she felt more aware of the whispers, of the covert glances, as she ate her meal of an omelette and a bottle of water, before getting hastily to her feet, needing some air.
She had swiftly hurried out of the dining hall, making her way past the library, past the makeshift-gymnasium, pursing her lips together tightly, feeling as though she couldn't breathe right now. Until finally she burst out of a door at the end of a long gloomy corridor, out into the bright sunshine.
But Blake stopped in her tracks suddenly, blinking.
For here, out in the courtyard she hadn't frequented since she had left the Sanctuary all those many weeks ago, was something indeed strange to behold.
A garden.
Plonked here amongst the dust, and the dirt, and the grimy factory windows.
The same garden she had asked Negan to create for his people all those many weeks ago. The same one she had encouraged him to set up. A garden that certainly hadn't been here in this entirety before she had left!
And yet now, it looked, well….beautiful.
The entire place was now covered in fresh green plants, some in tubs, wrapped around trestles, some surrounded by plastic greenhouses scavenged from different places. There were tomato plants, lettuce, beans, pumpkins, and on the far side under a shadowy grass area stood a little pen with a hen coop.
A few Saviour's both men and woman moved here and there, with watering cans and weeding tools, looking cheerful…like they had a purpose.
And Blake, at this, despite all her inner turmoil and the pain she was feeling right now, couldn't help but smile. Feeling happy.
"Blake," came a sudden voice from behind her, causing her to suddenly swing around.
The caramel-blonde woman blinked up now, to see Eugene crossing the courtyard towards her, wearing black button up shirt, black pants and matching black overcoat.
"Hey," Blake managed to utter out, her eyes flickering up towards him momentarily, feeling the top of her cheeks reddening.
Had he too heard about her and Negan's argument?
But the scientist merely nodded back, coming to stand before her, before suddenly, much to Blake's utter surprise, lifting a hand and placing it to her shoulder.
"It's good to see you. When I head you'd gone back to…well…back to Rick….and his…uhhh….people…" said Eugene in a low, earnest-sounding voice, speaking about the Alexandrians like had had never really known them. "…I thought I might never see you again."
Blake gave a small sniff, but didn't utter a word, her eyes instead drifting away over to where a small teenage girl with a green baseball hat on was plucking eggs out of the side of the hen coop easily, placing them into a square basket in her other hand.
Blake did not want to dwell of the happenings back at Alexandria, pushing the conversation instead to other things.
"This place…" she said finally, after a long moment or two of silence, as Eugene removed his comforting hand. "It looks….really, really good."
Eugene nodded slowly at her side.
"Yup," he mumbled back. "Negan's orders. He told us to get this place lookin' like a proper self-sustaining farmyard. Well, as much as it can be here anyway. We've got all sorta' scouts goin' out there every day with a list full of stuff to bring back. Fertilizers, peat, breedin' animals and so forth."
Eugene's tone was matter-of-fact as always, but Blake glanced at him, softening slightly.
Had Negan really taken all her words on board, and made a garden, not for himself, but to sustain his people? The people he had taken upon himself to take care of…
But she shook herself. Negan had proved to her that he thought very little about anyone but himself, so there had to be an ulterior motive to all this.
Blake bit at her lip, staring around the garden before turning back to Eugene.
"You think I might be able to help out here?" she asked a little tentatively, but Eugene gave her a blank, blinking look in return almost instantly.
"All this is yours anyway," he muttered bluntly. "I was just acting as an administrator in all this, until you got back."
Blake gave a small smile now.
All this…..hers?
This wondrous living part of the Sanctuary? Something she had helped to create here?
And for someone who had gone through two miscarriages and lost the one child she had loved more than anything, it was almost heart-warming to hear that this…something pure and hopeful in this hellish existence…could belong to her…to look after…to help grow…
"Thank you," Blake murmured back earnestly, letting a small gulp slide down her throat.
But Eugene, gave her a small, stiff smile.
"I really don' think I should be the one you should be thankin'," he said in a low voice, nodding slowly before heading quietly away and disappearing off inside.
Blake stared after him for a long moment, parting her lips and letting out a short breath of air.
Maybe, just maybe, this was her chance for a fresh start. A chance to build something good.
But even now, in the back of her mind, the voice of David, a voice that had been absent for so many weeks now, rang clear in her head.
With hateful, hurtful words that caused Blake to bow her chin low, and divert her eyes from the Saviours all around her, as she moved over toward the tomato plants.
Thus undoing all the good work Negan had managed to put right over these past few days, weeks and months….making her feel insignificant again.
It was late in the evening and getting dark outside, by the time Blake finally ventured inside, slightly dishevelled, with a sheen of perspiration lingering over her tanned collarbone.
But for the first time in a long while, exhausted from hard work, her bones aching from tending to the crops, weeding, shifting pots about.
But she felt happy after all that….contented even. Like she finally had a purpose here. And doing all that, well, it had helped take her mind of other things…
Other things that almost pained her to think about right now.
She was stubborn and proud and still so, so angry with Negan. But that didn't stop it from hurting…making her feel oh-so hollow and empty inside to be apart from him now.
She hadn't seen him the dark-haired Saviour all day. And apart from Arat earlier in the canteen, she hadn't even glimpsed Dwight or Simon, or one of the higher up General's that usually marched around in Negan's absence.
But maybe he didn't want to see her. Maybe that really was it. Maybe he was done with her.
Blake paced down the corridor that led back into the large canteen, busy now with people holing up inside for the evening, done with their work for the day, hoping to just grab a small bite to eat before heading back up to her room.
But Blake, sweeping her long slightly ruffled caramel-hair back over her shoulder, had barely made it a few feet into the room, when her eyes fell suddenly on a familiar face, striding across the open-plan hall, brow furrowed darkly, looking severely pissed-off, and talking in, what looked like, angry mutterings, to his right hand man beside him.
Negan.
Blake stopped in her tracks, her green eyes gazing over at him….
Seeing him for the first time since their argument. It all coming back to her now, painful and wounding.
And for a moment, Negan too, found her in the crowd, stopping immediately in what he was saying, his chocolate eyes staring her way.
Blake felt her heart almost instantly fall into her stomach, trying as hard as she could to find any sort of air in her lungs, as her heart pounded faster and faster, making her cheeks burn red.
But despite how much she yearned for him at this very moment, her gut jolting hard…she was still angry at what he had said to her. Upset at his choices.
And so, Blake, unable to take it anymore, tore her eyes swiftly away, dropping them to the floor and heading over to the line for dinner…
….just as Negan dragged his own irritable gaze away too, before turning and stalking off angrily himself…
Both of them as hot-headed, stubborn, and as furious as the other right now.
And neither wanting to be the first person to admit they were sorry…
Filler, sorry.
Thanks to CLTex, FriendsWithTheMonster, NegansLilBitch, Serruhep, Hmc09, MsSharingIsFun, Guest, Guest, Guest, Keward2592 and alliesmiley2 for commenting.
Sorry if that was a bit boring. But more to come soon, if you'd like it?
Please review if you can, I'd really appreciate a comment or two if you have the time. :)