It was early afternoon by the time Negan made it down to the large parlour at the far end of the third floor hallway, to find the doors as always, wide open.

The wives were currently sat around their large open-plan lounge area, talking animatedly with one another, by the time Negan strolled through the doorway, with Mia still balanced on his hip.

It was of course usual for these women to fix him with resentful stares the moment he walked into the room, but today all of them stopped in their conversation and gazed up at him., blinking slightly.

They were all today out of their usual garb of the short black dresses Negan had chosen them to wear a long, long time ago. And even he had to admit, it was good to see these women in pants and shirts, looking, well…..fucking comfortable.

He knew that all this was Blake's doing, and he had faux-begrudgingly agreed that they would remain like this for the time being.

Because, fuck, it wasn't as though he still needed the wives. But Negan still felt like he owed these gals something. For as a promise of them being with him, Negan had agreed to provide them with protection and a life not on the points system like the rest of the workers here. And so by removing them from this life, he was taking away all he had promised them all those many years ago. And Negan was a man of his word.

"Ladies," he said addressing them in a low and firm voice. "You seen Peaches?"

He had hoped that they'd have at least seen her in passing.

But Frankie, who was sat on the couch nearest to him, twisted herself around, and shook her head.

"Not since first thing this morning when she came to collect Mia…" the redhead said sounding concerned. "Is something wrong?"

But Negan gave a huff, his dark eyes flickering down to the toddler who was waving her hand shyly toward the group of women, her other drool covered paw stuck into her mouth.

"You gals alright to watch the kid for a while?" the leader of the Saviours muttered promptly, before he stared back over towards the gaggle of women, some of which were waving back at Mia happily.

Frankie instantly stood, making her way over to Negan.

He could tell how cold she was towards him. How cold all these women had always been if truth be told….

But as the red-haired woman reached up, easing the tiny little girl into her arms, he saw a warmth and a happiness, the likes of which had never seen in her, flood over Frankie.

"Of course we can take her," she said in a silly, baby voice, pulling Mia to her chest, as the toddler squealed in delight at being addressed in such a way. "You want to come play with us for a while, angel?"

The baby girl nodded, just as Frankie's face become serious again, and Tanya joined her at her side.

"Is there something the matter? With Blake?" the dark-haired woman asked, tilting her head to the side, her large brown eyes looking slightly concerned. "She didn't seem too great this morning, or yesterday when we saw her..."

But Negan's eyes darkened suddenly, as he lifted Lucille up onto his shoulder, running his fingers over his bearded mouth.

"Just take care of the kid, alright," he huffed, before turning on his heel and heading out of the room once more.

But out in the hallway, Negan let the smallest of gulps trail down his dry throat.

Shit.

Everything was supposed to be fucking good between them, him and Blake.

Yet now….

After the nightmares he had been suffering with for the past few nights, Negan didn't think he could handle much more of a strain.

What the fuck did he do now? Lock down the entire fucking place?

Put a call out to everyone? Send out a search party?

There had been very few times in his life where Negan had felt as lost as he did right now….

That was the reason he had gotten where he was today, normally so headstrong and calculating.

But right now….unable to find hide nor hair of the woman he fucking loved, Negan felt completely disoriented….lost…..not knowing what to do next.

Blake was like his fucking rock these days….always there to calm him down,...to brighten his fucking day. And yet now she wasn't there….

The last time Negan had felt like this was when Blake had returned to Alexandria….and he had gone from her being in his life every day...to not seeing her at all for weeks on end. Those long, lonely days filling with darkness, as they had been before he had met her.

And yet again, Negan felt himself already falling into that pit….that anger...that pain….that rage, returning.

Negan's sloped off now, a dark frown line lingering between his heavy brows as he went….heading back down the hallway, making his way back to his room to fetch his radio.

Without the burden of Mia clinging to him he would be able to bellow down that fucking thing to his heart's content, until he, or someone else, finally found her. Blake.

But as he reached the wood-panelled door to his room, his stopped suddenly in the hallway….something catching his attention….

A breeze….

...drifting its way down the long hallway.

A breeze he had felt here before….late at night when he had awoken to find Blake missing then too….

Negan blinked for a moment, turning his head to where at the far end of the long and gloomy hallway there stood a door….

...now, as it had been that night too, slightly ajar….

Negan licked slowly at his lips, before pacing suddenly towards it….

...his heart thud, thud, thudding as he went.

And it took him only a moment to reach the end of the hallway, the breeze feeling far stronger here, the dark-haired man taking in a large breath of air through his nose...steadying himself, as he reached up with his free hand….

...giving the rickety door a smooth shove open…

He had been out here once before, upon this small balcony, that overlooked the fenced-off lots below. On the night he had confessed to Blake what she truly meant to him after months of holding it in, being too fucking cowardly to tell her.

She had been standing here in one of his shirts looking like perfection on that night….

And now, the small rooftop, littered with a few brown and golden fallen leaves looked entirely the same…

….including the same figure, standing there, leaning against the railing…

...just as she had been that night.

"Peaches?" Negan uttered, his mouth feeling drier than he had expected it to.

But she didn't look the same as she had done then, and there was no smile for him now, as she turned to face him.

Instead, Blake's head was bowed, her shoulders hunched over, gazing at something in her hands.

He could see now that she had been crying, long blonde strands of hair clinging to her tear strewn cheeks, as her green eyes finally found his.

"I-I can't-" she began in a wavering voice, before trailing off, shaking her head, as another couple of glinting tears slid their way down her cheeks.

What the heck was wrong?

Was this all to do with the conversation she had with Carson? With her spells of dizziness?

For right now, Blake looked lost….worried….frightened...

Negan almost immediately closed the gap between the pair of them, lifting his free hand to her face, his thumb swiping away those starry tears before they could fall any further.

"Darlin', what the fuck's going' on?" he said, his voice heavier than he had meant it to be as his dark eyes searched hers.

His heart was thudding in his chest.

Shit.

Was this Lucille all over again? Fucking cancer?

But Blake gave another shake of her head, looking completely and utterly lost right now, as a gulp slid its way down her slender and exposed throat.

"I t-think I've known for a while now…" she said in a quiet voice. "I tried to pretend it wasn't real..that it wasn't happening...but…"

Her sentence trailed off again, as her gaze flickered from his, her emerald eyes darting over to her right worriedly.

What the fuck was going on here? Was she sick? Dying? Bit?

But Negan didn't have a chance to vocalise any of this, as Blake's suddenly glanced back at him looking despondent and scared.

"I've felt like this before….t-twice before…." she said licking slowly at her lips, as she tilted her head to the side, more tears falling from her green eyes. "...I-I should have known, but I just…..I-I just…."

She bowed her head for the brief moment before letting a steadying puff of air ease from her lips.

"...I-I just….I don't know if I can do this….n-not now….not here…" she continued, Negan hearing the tears in her voice now. Hearing how frightened she obviously was...

But Negan started at her, a frown upon his temples, searching Blake for any clues as to what the fuck was going on, as he dropped his hand.

"Peaches…." he uttered out harshly, sick of this shit. If it was bad fucking news he wanted to hear it now. "What the hell are you fuckin' talkin' about?"

But Blake lifted her head, staring up into Negan's face, as she gave a long and slow blink….

"I'm pregnant…"

All of sudden, in that moment, it was as though the entire world had gone deadly quiet.

Negan blinked a couple of times, the frown upon his brow darkening slightly as he stared at her in utter disbelief.

"What did you just say?..." he just about managed to growl out.

But Blake lifted the object she had been holding between her hands, taking a small step back from him.

And it was then that he saw it, the small white stick in her hand that told him he he had not just been hearing things…

Negan reached up taking it from her, examining carefully the small blue cross that sat in the middle of the small indented rectangle.

"...Carson said I'm just over a month gone.…" Blake said in a quiet voice, as Negan traced his thumb over the cross...parting his lips. "...m-my birthday, I guess…."

He gazed up into the blonde's face.

Of course Negan remembered Blake's birthday….once in the bathtub that morning….and then later on the bed in the RV….

"...we've not been very careful…." Blake carried on….before hanging her head once more, and giving a sob, clutching her free hand to her mouth. "I just...I c-can't do this, Negan…."

The dark-haired Saviour stared up at her, breathing hard, watching as she shook her head, her chest heaving, wracked with heavy and fearful sobs.

All this….

It was as though Negan's mind couldn't quite catch up….as he stood there almost shell-shocked.

"Y-You're pregnant?" he finally said in a croaky voice.

Fuck.

He and Lucille had tried for fucking years for a kid, but the docs had told her that that just wasn't a possibility for her.

And so that had been the beginning of the end for them.

They'd grown apart….Lucille pushing him away and becoming distant and Negan, at a time when his wife had probably needed him most, had been a fucking coward, turning to drink and other women for solace.

But it was only a moment later, that staring up into his eyes, Blake gave another small sob.

"I'm so sorry…." she said, another tear slipping its way down her cheek, trailing an unsteady line past her nose and around the tiny almost invisible laughter lines around her mouth, that made his heart beat faster when he stared at her.

But who was he kidding?

Everything about her made his heart beat faster….her eyes…..her smile…...the way she wrinkled her nose at him, when she was annoyed…...or the way her skin felt against his early in the morning….

She was his fucking everything, and there was really nothing in this world she needed to be sorry for. Not now. Not ever.

Negan, lifted his hand to her cheek once more, trying to wordlessly communicate with her just what she meant to him right now.

"Peaches, why the fuck are you sayin' sorry to me…." he said shaking his head in frustration. "You cheat on me?"

She looked at him suddenly.

"No!" answered Blake quickly, mirroring him and giving her own small shake of her head as she frowned sharply, tears still glinting in her eyes.

"Then what the fuck are you sorry for, hmmm?" he said, swiping his thumb over another tear as it fell. "You're having my kid."

There. He'd said it. She was having his kid.

HIS damn kid.

Negan had been an uncle. Hell, he'd taught elementary and middle school kids all his fucking life. But never, ever had he thought that this day would come…

That he would get this fucking chance.

Negan stared at her now, as her eyes fell to the floor once more.

But he wasn't having this from her.

"You think I don't' want this?" he said suddenly, narrowing his eyes in her direction.

But Blake merely gave a silent sob, her lip quivering as she stood there, unable to look at him now.

Shit. That was what she thought, wasn't it?

"This just wasn't the way it was supposed to happen…." she said finally, tears sloshing their way down her face freely now. "...I've been pregnant before and I…...I-I couldn't-"

But she stopped, unable to say any more.

And that was when Negan truly saw what this was all about….why she had come up here instead of coming straight back to him.

Why he could hear fear and worry in her voice…..

Why he could see it in her face, and in those tears that covered her cheeks...

For Blake had told him about her other two pregnancies…..and how those had ended….

And not even the Saviour, as shut off and as cold to the world as he was, couldn't begin to imagine what that must have felt like.

To feel something growing inside you…. and then just….

The tall, bearded man gave a gulp now, the corners of his mouth twitching downwards.

But he couldn't let her feel like this, and in an instant, Negan had moved his hand to her chin, drawing her tear-filled eyes up to his, once more.

"Darlin', we're havin' a fuckin' kid," he said, his voice low and earnest, as he gazed at her like she was the most precious thing to right now she fucking was. "What's happened before…..it happened an' nothin' can change that." He shook his head. "But hell, you've survived in this fuckin' world. Youre stronger now than you've ever fuckin' been. You're a damn queen, Peaches."

He saw Blake open her mouth to argue, but Negan spoke first, shutting down every worry that he knew was about to spill from her lips.

"I fuckin' love you. To the ends of the goddamn earth, I love you, Darlin'…"

And with that, Negan glanced down, pulling his hand from her face and instead running it over her flat abdomen.

Blake's eyes too dropped to the space between them momentarily, before their eyes met once more….

"I love you too," she said in what was barely a whisper…

...and in that moment, her face broke into a sad sort of smile as the caramel-blonde woman gave a sniff, blinking tears from her eyes.

Negan felt his heart soar a little, and with a widening grin of his own, and a mumbled "C'mere", he tugged her into him, enveloping her within his strong leather-clad arms.

Blake's hands moved to clutch at his forearms, as he heard her give a small, but happy sort of laugh into his neck, tears seemingly still slipping from her eyes.

And it felt like an eternity later that the par of them finally pulled apart, and Blake let out a steadying puff of air, glancing down once again at the stick in her hands.

"You really think we can actually do this?" she eventually murmured, her green eyes catching his brown ones a little worriedly.

But Negan gave a wide smile, licking at his lips and showing off his line of perfect white teeth.

"Peaches," he said raising a single eyebrow. "That's my kid your carryin' in there. Damn thing is gonna force us to fuckin' do this. Kids gonna be fuckin' royalty."

The blonde, at once, rolled her eyes, swiping away the stray tears that now still lingered on her gorgeous cheeks.

But nevertheless she wrinkled her nose smiling up at Negan now, before standing up tall and pressing her lips to his ear.

"Just like their Daddy…." she said with a glad purr, which warmed his body and his heart.

But Negan, giving a wolf-like grin and pulling back, allowed his lips to hover over hers...

"Just like their damn Momma too….." he uttered, before kissing the blonde woman gently…..

...feeling, right at this moment, happier than he ever had done in his entire fucking life.

Ahhhhh fluuuff!

So….did you guys guess what was up with her?

Gosh, I really hope that was ok. Do you want more?

Thanks to shesxperfect, chelseajowhite, CaptainWilliamsN7, CTex, Nicole, LJH, Guest, angelvoice15, JasminJW, Guest and Guest for commenting on the last chapter.

Please review! :)