Tara stared up at the person standing before her.
Already up and dressed, in a checked blue shirt and his usual wide-rimmed sheriff's hat lowered down over his bandaged eye, Carl merely stared back at her, his face a picture of worry.
"Carl, said Tara, a little taken aback by his presence. "I was just-"
But the teenager merely took a step towards the dark-haired woman, his face fixed and serious
"We need to talk," he repeated in a low voice.
Tara gulped.
Shit. Did he know that she had been about to leave and go to the Sanctuary to inform Blake and the people there, exactly what Rick and Michonne had planned?
But the look on his face, and the way he had planted himself between her and the exit out of the community, really did say it all.
And so, with a short, easy nod, Tara hooked her thumb over shoulder, pointing back towards her house.
"Well, I errr, I guess we should go inside then…" she murmured, trying to sound cool, but inside her heart was pounding.
If this got back to Rick, what would the leader of the community do?
Place her under house arrest like he had with Blake all those months ago?
Tara didn't dare think of that now.
She turned on her heel, hearing Carl follow her inside, shutting the door quietly behind himself with a snap.
It was cool and dark in the large house. And sliding her grimy jacket from her aching shoulders, Tara flung it over the railing, before walking easily into the large open-plan kitchen at the far end of the hallway ahead of her.
Her hands were shaking and she hoped now that Carl wouldn't notice.
"You..uhh...want any juice or anything?" she asked him, behind her, conversationally. But Carl didn't answer.
And it was only when she was halfway across the kitchen, that she turned back to see him shake his head in answer to her question.
"No," he said giving a small frown of frustration, obviously not here for juice or polite conversation now. "Look Tara, I heard what you said to Michonne, just now, back at the house."
The dark-haired woman gave another gulp, setting down the carton of juice she had picked up from the side with heavy sigh.
"Sorry, I, errr, I didn't think you'd be up…" she mused, regretting turning up on Michonne's doorstep at the crack of dawn like that, especially knowing that the kids would likely be asleep upstairs.
But Carl gave another shake of his head, sending his long brown hair fluttering around his shoulders.
"What you said about Blake….was it true? That she got shot, and that she lost her baby?"
Tara could have kicked herself. She should have known better than to talk about that kind of shit on their doorstep. How could she have been so stupid?
"Carl...dude, I-" she began, but Carl cut across her before she could say another word.
"That shouldn't have happened," he said suddenly. "All this….it shouldn't be this way. People are getting hurt, killed...on purpose, and that….that's on us."
Tara licked at her lips, staring up at him with sad brown eyes.
He was right. This was on all of them.
Shit. She hadn't expected this from Carl, not in a million years, his words ringing all too true to her now.
Everything that had happened until now. All the death and destruction that Rick had told everyone was down to the Saviours….they too, had equally been responsible for massacres and murder.
Tara could see that they weren't the Saints that they made themselves out to be, and obviously now Carl could see that too…
The dark-haired woman made to open her mouth to speak, but the young boy continued again before she could say anything.
"Negan and my Dad, they're a lot more similar than you'd think. They both want the same thing, and that's gonna get everyone killed," he said tilting his head to the side and shifting his weight from foot-to-foot. "All my dad and Michonne care about these days is finding enough guns and ammo to end the war, but how many more people are gonna hurt in the fallout, huh? Blake got hurt and Negan is bound to retaliate for that. And it will go back and forth and back and forth, until we're all dust."
Tara felt her lip begin to tremble.
Carl was right. This war couldn't be won by either side, could it?
It was all utterly hopeless.
They had strived so far and for so long to be the ones who survived, but at what cost?
"Tara," Carl said again now in a clear voice, his eyes meeting directly with hers. "We need to do something. Make my Dad and Negan see that there's a better way. That we don't have to keep fighting. That we can make this world better if we just work together. And I know you want that too."
But Tara gave a difficult frown, her eyes filling with tears of utter frustration at the situation.
"Y-Yeah, of course I do. But how? You think either of them will actually listen to anything we say?" she said with a hard shake of her head. "Your Dad's out there right now gathering guns. And we've both seen Negan and his men….they've got practically an entire army behind them. And it doesn't look like he's ready to back down soon, not after what happened."
But Carl lifted his chin, looking just like his Dad in the early morning light, the determination perfectly visible on his young face.
"That's why I need to go there, to the Sanctuary, to talk to him, make him see that this isn't the only way," the brown-haired boy said firmly.
But Tara shook her head, letting out a shallow, bemused sounding laugh. "Nu-uh. No way," she uttered. "Both your Dad AND Negan will kill both you, and me, if you go anywhere near there, I only got out of the Sanctuary because of Blake. And after all that's happened, if you go there, Negan isnt gonna take you home like he did last time. He'll kill you, Carl, and everyone else here too, just to prove a point."
But Carl shook his head once more.
"No he won't, because deep down he wants the same thing, I'm sure of it, Tara," Carl muttered in reply. "He cares about Blake and he'll want to protect her. And maybe this is how he can do that. If we can convince him that it's the right thing to do. Show him that war isn't the only way."
Tara worried at her lip with her teeth.
Maybe Carl was right.
For she had witnessed Negan's utter devotion to Blake first-hand.
And if somehow Carl could get through to Negan, maybe that would prevent anything else bad from happening.
Negan could offer up a truce and hopefully Rick and the people here would take that offer, stopping any stupid plans that Rosita and Sasha had in their tracks.
It was risky, but as young as Carl was, he was braver than most almost everyone here, that was obvious.
And, he was right, they had to at least try.
But, god…...was she really going to do this?
Every sane part of her was telling her that this was a mistake, and that in some way, shape, or form, she was going to regret it.
But, taking a deep breath, Tara clenched her fists at her sides, mirroring Carl's determined stance.
"Alright, fine," she said throwing her head back a little and groaning loudly, before dropping her chin again and pointing Carl's way. "But if your Dad finds out, this is all on you, deal?."
"Deal," replied Carl in serious voice. "Listen, he'll be back from his run soon. But I know for a fact that him and Michonne are planning to head out in a couple of days time. And they'll be gone for a few nights at least."
God was she really going to do this? Go back there to the Sanctuary after everything that had happened.
Tara knew that Blake had risked a lot getting her out of there like that. And it was unlikely Negan would let her go a second time.
But if Carl really did think he could get through to Negan, make him see that there was another path, maybe Blake's life could be spared. And right now that was all that Tara hoped for.
She and the other people here had put her friend through enough, and it was time for Tara to apologise in the only way she knew how.
And so with a small internal sigh, The dark-haired woman gave one final nod, her mind made up.
"Ok," she murmured back in return. "Two days then."
Thanks so much to Moonwolf27, Torey, CaptainWilliamsN7, miserychick17, CLTex, LJH, stacey40, Elizabeth, Guest and BlueBloodsSVUOrder for reviewing.