Blake had had an eventful afternoon.

It was strange to be back at the Sanctuary after all this time away. And yet in an odd way she had never felt more at home. Back where she belonged.

She hadn't seen nor heard from Negan since his unannounced absence, but knew that if she was going to keep Carl and Tara out of harm's way, then that was probably for the best.

She of course totally understood Negan's frustration with how she had dealt with things. Blake had told him point blank that she hadn't been ready to come back this morning at the white house when he had asked her, and yet here she was.

But despite understanding Negan's anger with it all, Blake needed him to understand that all of this was for him and for Mia, to create a better life for both of them. Negan had build this place from the ground up and made it what it was today. But Blake just hoped that he would understand that the way to achieving a future without further death and bloodshed, would be to make peace, even with assholes like Rick Grimes.

Once they had finished in the canteen, Blake had showed Tara and Carl to her old room on the second floor where they had agreed to stay, with the protection of Dwight on patrol outside upon Blake's orders.

It wasn't that Blake didn't trust the Saviours, her own people. But she had seen the hostility the two Alexandrians had earned downstairs in the dining hall, and didn't want anything happening to either of them before she could make sure they were packed off home at first light tomorrow.

And so she and Mia had said their goodbyes and spent the rest of the afternoon searching for Negan.

The dark-haired Saviour was indeed a hard man to track down. And after getting side-tracked twice, once by Arat, who had embraced Blake, happy to see her back and looking well. And the second time by Tanya, who had gladly offered to take a sleepy Mia (who had dozed off on Blake's shoulder) to her room and get her ready for bed. Which then left Blake alone in her searching for the grumpy man.

She finally found him, after what felt like hours of wandering around the drafty Sanctuary hallways, up on the rooftop.

A place Blake had not been since she had told Negan the news that she had been pregnant, what felt like so long ago now….

So much had happened between them in such a short space of time, so much hurt and pain but so many good memories too.

Negan truly was everything to her and she breathed a sigh of relief looking upon finding him up here.

Blake stepped out onto the cold rooftop.

The wind had picked up, causing her long caramel hair to flutter around her, as she emerged from the doorway.

Negan was hunched over the wall on the far side, hand linked together, shoulders rolled forwards, staring out across the darkened Sanctuary lots below, eyes narrowed and jaw clenched firmly shut.

He looked like a man deeply resigned to something and Blake had to admit she was more than a little nervous to find out what.

She took a step forwards, letting the door behind her clatter shut, clutching her arms tightly around herself as the wind bit at her.

"It's freezing up here…" she mused in gentle voice, knowing full well Negan was aware of her presence. Yet it unnerved her a little that he hadn't turned around and acknowledged her, a nervous feeling gnawing at the pit of her stomach.

Maybe he hadn't forgiven her for bringing them here. Maybe he had changed his mind….

But what choice had Blake had?

If she hadn't have come with them, Carl and Tara would have just come here without her. And what would've happened then? Something far worse than the pair of them sleeping in a nice cosy room downstairs that was for sure.

The blonde tilted her head, approaching Negan slowly and coming to stand beside him, staring out a the same expanse of lot below, resting her forearms on the cold wall before her.

The pair were quiet for a long couple of minutes, both just gazing at the blackness ahead of them, beyond the lots, where there were no lights for miles around. Nothing but the darkness.

"I'm sorry," Blake whispered finally, chewing on her lip and glancing Negan's way. "I know you're still mad-"

"I ain't mad, Darlin'" he sighed, immediately cutting her off. "My head is jus' full of shit right now is all."

He reached up and ran a hand down his long, stubbly face, squeezing his eyes shut for a second or two as Blake peered at him.

He licked at his lips before dropping his gaze to his hands still clasped before him.

"That kid….Grimes' kid...his daughter…." he said, a hurt, sad sort of frown adorning his brow now, as he shook his head "...she's only gotta be...what...Beansprout's age?…."

He trailed off, his mouth downturned into a grimace, as he hung his head low, his rounded shoulders hunching even more. "Fuck...she's just a damn baby. Hell, they both are. An' I dont wanna…." he huffed, "...shit…."

He hissed out a breath as Blake blinked at him curiously, parting her lips, as he stood up straight finally, his dark hazel eyes meeting finally with hers.

And Blake could see instantly that this was a man that had been thinking hard about what he was about to say, a sadness and a loss plastered over his gaze, that hadn't been there earlier.

"I can't hurt those kids Peaches. I don' fuckin' want that. I never fuckin' wanted that. Shit, all this…. It was never fuckin' supposed to be like this. I was never supposed ta'..."

But Negan let his head drop forwards again, squeezing his eyes shut.

Blake stepped forward, her green eyes searching his lined and tired-looking face and the sheer exhaustion that lay upon it.

"It's ok," she whispered caringly, pressing her palm to the his chest, to the place just over his heart. "This shouldn't all be on you-"

Blake knew that was the truth now.

Fuck.

It had been a mistake bringing Carl and Tara here like this.

But Negan lifted his own hand and quickly grasped a hold of the hand Blake had pressed against his chest and brought her digits up to his chin.

"But it fuckin' is, Peaches. You're right. You were damn right all along an' I shoulda' fuckin' listened to ya. Hell, this world is a goddamn shitshow. You an' I both know that. But those kids….they shouldn't have ta' live in a fucking world like that...where you've got people at war with each other all the goddamn time," he said staring into Blake's eyes with urgency.

The blonde's heart pounded now.

Here Negan was, so intense, so decided.

But his decision here could change their lives. For better or for worse, Blake wasn't sure. But regardless, it was a huge risk for anyone in this world, especially Negan, with what he had built.

And yet here he was, doing this, not for her….but for Mia, and for Judith, and all the kids that had the potential to suffer the most in all this.

Blake pushed herself close to him, lifting her other hand to his bearded cheek.

"Are you sure about this?" she asked quietly.

But Negan, lifting her hand to his lips and kissing her knuckles affectionately, let out a long hard sigh as he closed his eyes for another brief moment.

"No, I ain't…" he said in a tired voice. "...but I know I've gotta fuckin' try. For Beansprout….for you," he said licking at his lips harshly. "Shit. Y'know, when my wife died, back then…..I thought….I thought that was it, thought I wouldn't get a fuckin' chance to have what everyone else had. A damn family. Kids of my own to care about. An' yet here you both are. I fuckin' found you. An' I ain't about to risk all that for my own goddamn pride anymore."

Blake gave an understanding nod, feeling a swell of love for the man before her.

And she was silent for a moment, on that cold rooftop, as the wind whipped through her long blonde hair tangling it around her face. But Negan, almost instantly swept it away with a flick of her own free hand, brushing it back against her head softly.

He truly was her soulmate, through and through, and Blake had never been more certain that he was the person she was supposed to have found in this world. Never been more certain that the cruel realities of this world had brought her to this place, to Negan, for a reason.

"I love you," Blake whispered. "So much."

And Negan tugged her into him by the back of her head, tucking her head underneath his chin and wrapping his other hand around her shoulders, holding her close to him.

From here Blake closed her eyes, feeling the slow drumming of his heartbeat against her ear. Feeling so safe and warm within his embrace.

And like that they remained as the seconds passed them by. Together. A king and queen reunited again.

Blake knew that now. And so did Negan.

"Shit, Peaches," he murmured finally after a moment or two, pulling back with a stiff sigh and eyeing her, his hand sliding over her cheek cold affectionately. "Let's get inside before I fucking freeze my damn nutsack off out here."

Blake gave a nod, her face breaking into a small smile, as she took his hand, allowing him to lead her back inside, out of the cold once more…

...back into the warmth of the darkened Sanctuary hallway. Where they both belonged.

Thanks to AresnicHatter, stacey40, IzzyNeko, tomieharley, Green, BlueBloodsSVU Order and Guest for reviewing.

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