By Ianthe on SpaceBattles
[Adamant. Behemoth is not jesting. Query: has Simurgh received High Priest's message? Command #42 is designated Simurgh's destiny!]
[Wonderment. Simurgh's Destiny? Disbelief. Simurgh must be running faulty simulated chronology.]
[Simurgh's precognition is not malfunctioning. Behemoth will provide verification. Request reiteration: 'Ziz Prism Power!']
[Incredulous. Reiteration request accepted. Ziz Prism Power!]
[Delight. Elation. Glee. Joy. He He HeHeHeH-]
*thwack*
[Admonishment. Stay in character.]
[Sheepish. Apologies. Query: Explanation of situation? Erroneousness of simulated chronology exacerbation suspected. Simurgh commits to no longer observe with current fidelity settings. Panic. Simurgh desires interaction with virtual simulation designation 'Sailor V', not exist within it.]
"Help me! Please help me! Somebody, please help me! Ahghahaahg!"
[Identification: identity of designation is 'Lucy Cheung'.]
[Agreement. Designation 'Lucy Cheung' is in risk of unrecoverable damage.]
[Worry. Uncertainty. Query: How can Simurgh assist? Behemoth forgets with regularity, Simurgh is only a Conflict Sentinel.]
[Encouragement. Simurgh is designation 'Sailor Ziz'. Simurgh will find solution to problem when Simurgh observes own core, and believes in herself.]
[... Reluctance. Okay.]
Outside the BBFO office, Skidmark stood, one arm holding a chinese high-school girl by the scruff of her shirt, the other, spanning around him casting fields of blue as the DWU surrounded him with improvised weapons. They were tense, vigilant eyes looking for any opening to strike at the adversary.
"Somebody, *argh*, please help me!" Lucy struggled as her legs dangled in the air.
His hand tightened around the scruff, choking her. "Do you see any lizards? Hmm?" he asked as he panned her gagging form across the dock area. "Fuck no!" he shouted, spittle coming out from his mouth. "There's no fucking one to help you now, bitch!"
"*urk* help me." Lucy gasped weakly, causing Skidmark to grimace and lighten his hold on her shirt slightly.
"Where are you over-fucking-grown iguanas!? Come out and fight me!" he screamed, and right on cue, the Endbringer sirens started wailing.
[Demand: let the hostage go.] A white figure descended from the sky, her collection of mismatched wings flapping in different directions. She was wearing a sailor suit with a large red bow, a golden brooch holding it in place. Long white gloves adorned her arms, only noticeable thanks to their red trim, and long, bright red boots embellished her legs. Her silvery hair held two ruby orbs fixing her hair into twintails, a tiara completed her ensemble.
"What was that?" Skidmark asked, his face scrunched up in bemusement.
[Reiteration. Let the hostage go.] What seemed to be the Simurgh repeated, her mandate reverberating through the heads of everyone in sight like no voice should.
"Who the fuck are you!?" Skidmark demanded, a reasonable request if not for the sheer infamy of the figure standing before him.
"Are you serious?" Lucy drawled in a deadpanned, any fear she had before leaving her visage entirely. "How high in orbit are you? That's the Simurgh," she pointed out in a dry tone.
With disbelieving eyes, the crowd witnessed the Simurgh fidget in nervousness, [Hesitation. Conflict Sentinel's designation is...]
Something clicked into place, and anxiety left the angel's form. [Confidence. Determination. Self-reference designation is 'Sailor Ziz', the Champion of Justice!] she spoke courageously. [By command of the High Priest, Sailor Ziz shall rectify all violations, and triumph over moral deviants!] she posed in confidence, [and that target definition includes designation Skidmark!] and pointed right at the masked man looking higher than a kite.
"Sailor Ziz?" Skidmark's tapped his chin in contemplation. "Never fucking heard of you," he grinned a grin that would be vicious, if not for his opponent, "and I'm fucking sure I'll never fucking will again!" A field of violet surrounded Sailor Ziz, slowly pushing her away like a calm wave to a cruise ship.
"He sure wouldn't," Lucy muttered sarcastically, still hanging by her scruff.
"Arise, my comrades, and serve the great power that is the 420-j!" Skidmark raised both his arms, lifting an unimpressed Lucy in the air.
"We're not with Voyager here," came a hasty reply as the union members slowly inched away from the madman.
[Behemoth, assistance is required! Simurgh does not know how to proceed!] The field strengthened, increasing her repulsion from imperceptible to that of a snail's crawl, a particularly slow snail that had died from a terminal muscular dystrophic disease.[Instigation detected. Request abortion of operation.]
[Exasperation. Suggestion. Sailor Ziz. Cease irrational behavior.] came an equally voiceless reply, one that could only be described as the sound of gravel in a tumble dryer. [Sailor Ziz must continue conflict with moral deviants, or existence failure of the universe may be imminent,] the strangely coherent landslide attempted to reason amidst the spontaneous laughter of Skidmark.
As if it was at all possible, the winged one began wailing, [Anxiousness. Nervousness. Fear. Simurgh is afraid, Simurgh desires to return home.]
"Fine," Skidmark replied with a huff, "I'll send you back to fucking orbit!" The force field strengthened yet again, pushing Sailor Ziz back at the blazing speed of a pseudopodium's locomotion, causing her to scream and the dockworkers to scatter like ants.
A crimson rose pierced the concrete ground, breaking Skidmark's concentration, red petals floating in the breeze.
"What the fuck now?" he sighed, turning to the new arrival standing upon the BBFO's office roof.
"I am Tuxedo Mask," came the charming reply, and indeed, the mysterious savior was wearing both a tuxedo and a mask. "Sailor Zi-"
"Hey, isn't that Saurial?" Lucy questioned suspiciously, her eyes were slits in scrutiny.
"Drat," was the stranger's reply. "What gave me away? My disguise is nearly perfect."
"Tail," came the collective reply of Lucy and all the dockworkers.
"It's not that conspicuous," Saurial muttered as she slowly retracted her bright blue tail behind her cloak and cleared her throat. "Sailor Ziz, look into your heart and find the warrior within you. It is your destiny."
The many-winged one simply stared blankly at the new arrival, [distraught confusion. Simurgh is not designated 'Warrior', 'Warrior' is designation of Scion,] she pointed out tentatively, her buzzing non-voice trembled as she did and she started wailing again, disorienting everyone except 'Tuxedo Mask' within the vicinity.
"Stop your bloody crying!" Skidmark finally dropped Lucy and pushed even harder on Sailor Ziz, repulsing her imperceptively more.
Behemoth's gravelly rumble appeared once more, [Urgently. Sailor Ziz. Broadcast 'Ziz Tiara Magic!' and eject equipped tiara at designated target immediately.]
[Confusion. Query: purpose of action? Resulting accomplishment from action?]
[Rebuttal,] impossibly, an image was conveyed from the sound of gravel.
[Complete embarrassment. Ziz Tiara Magic!] Sailor Ziz halfheartedly tossed her tiara at Skidmark.
"N- *thwack*," where it smacked against the top of his head with a meaty thwack, downing him with a sideways flip and a stellar demonstration of regio facialis horticulture.
The angel stared at the foul-mouthed druggie, face down on the pavement. [Wonderment. Sailor Ziz did that?] she questioned in awe.
Skidmark slowly and painfully crawled onto all fours, "I, shall, retur-," only for Lucy to kick him in the bottom, downing him once more.