CHAPTER 5

Starscream gasped and groaned, exhausted. He didn't stop running until he was 100% sure he was out of the Autobots' hearing, sight and radar range.

Just because he had 'accidentally' destroyed Bumblebee's T-cog, which MECH needed for their 'Transformer', the little pests absolutely had to take his instead! Without wings and without lasers, he was almost completely helpless, save for his claws and his arm-missiles, but he only had two of those left. Usually they just reappear by themselves, but he feared the absence of his T-cog might affect that as well. He couldn't waste his missiles, not until he could find more, at least.

And to make matters worse, his little surgery had depleted him of even more energon.

"I am never trusting humans anymore!" he huffed and sat down by a boulder to rest. "I'm really glad none of my fellow Decepticons are here to see me in this pathetic state…"

He swallowed his words when a royal blue jet-plane soared across the sky above him. A Vehicon flier? Soundwave? Megatron?!

The jet ignored him, or perhaps it hadn't even noticed his presence. Seemed to be fairly common nowadays to ignore the Seeker. Either way, the jet continued its path through the clouds, probably on its way to the Nemesis. Starscream sighed in annoyance. If it wasn't for those treacherous humans, he could have followed the stranger and returned to the Nemesis as well…

"But what good would that do?" he muttered to himself. "Megatron has already made it clear that I am not welcome aboard the ship anymore. And without my wings, I can forget everything about energon cubes. I need to find more crystals."

He rose up and started to walk through the forest. The night gave life to many creepy sounds; owls tooting, wolves howling and a flock of bats flying by, shrieking. Starscream winced every time one of these sounds reached his audio receptors.

I really hate this place, I really hate this place, I really hate this place…

He heard a deep growl and looked to the sides. What was that Rartorata had said about bears? The Seeker had never seen one. How big could an organic creature like a bear grow?

His question got answered right away, as a large grizzly bear walked out from between the trees, right towards him. Although it wasn't more than half his own size, it did seem pretty ferocious and much bulkier than him. The bear growled deeply as it approached him. He let out a nervous laughter.

"Please, what is a tiny organic like you going to do to me, a Decepticon, far more superior than a simple fleshling?" he said to the bear, more as an attempt to convince himself of his advantage rather than to intimidate the animal. "I have metal, you have flesh! I could easily crush you beneath my—"

He had been so busy blabbering that he unknowingly had allowed the bear to get close to him, and he first realized that when the bear swiped at the Seeker's legs. Starscream was surprised by its excessive strength, which knocked him over and made him fall on his back. The bear bit onto his left arm, and despite his big talk about 'metal and flesh', the bear's teeth really hurt and dug holes, however blunt, into his armor.

Starscream shrieked in pain and retaliated by swiping his own claws at the creature. He knocked it off him and it let go of his arm. The bear ran off with three large, deep, red bleeding wounds across the side of its body. It would either die from its wounds, or it would gain the heck of some scars.

Starscream sat up, gasping and looking after the bear, and as it disappeared from sight and sound, he looked down at his arm. A few deep blue dents, but thankfully it hadn't pierced through far enough to make them leak.

"Okay, I get it," he said to the forest around him. "I'll leave you stupid nature alone as long as you leave me alone!" He rose up, holding onto the wounded arm, and walked along the trees.

He eventually came to a glade, which had – he sighed – another abandoned cave. No, wait, this one wasn't abandoned. The bear he had just fought was lying on the floor inside, bleeding, whimpering. Wait, the whimpering wasn't coming from the bear…

Two tiny bears peeked from behind the big bear. They were smaller than those human kids…

The mother bear glared at Starscream, growling at her cubs to stay behind her…or, that's what he assumed she said, anyway. He didn't speak bear. She didn't get up to fight him back though. Apparently those wounds he had given her were too severe. She was definitely not going to survive. Her cubs were whimpering concerned over their mother's condition and in fear of the trespasser.

He wasn't sure how to respond to this. Normally, he would laugh or spit at such sentimental nonsense, let alone fleshlings…but something inside him gave him this weird feeling, something he hadn't felt in a long time, if ever…guilt.

It was his fault the mother bear was wounded and unable to fend for her cubs. If she died, the cubs would die as well. But that was their problem, not his. This didn't concern him…and yet it did.

"Ugh, what is with me?" Starscream said, turning away from the moarning bears and walked away. "Is this what it feels like to be an outcast? Loneliness? Fear? Helplessness? Sadness? I'm sick and tired of this planet."

He was beginning to think he only said that to hide the truth…he was getting sick of himself.

Starscream's log

Entry #16

I had to sleep without shelter last night. I was simply too exhausted, and my usual cave was occupied by a bear I had severely injured. For some reason I feel guilty about hurting it.

Why? Why are all these feelings coming to me? Why now? Why, after leaving the Decepticons and living on my own?

Why am I so hungry all the time?

Why am I getting so emotional lately?

Why do I keep getting these cramps in my chest area when I least expect it?

What's happening to me…?

Starscream's log

Entry #17

I found another abandoned mine and quickly consumed whatever little scraps I could find. Then, I found something interesting further in the cave.

Airachnid. And – get this – an Insecticon, one of Cybertron's most feared pestilences, second to Scraplets. She seemed to be controlling it, like she's its queen or something like that.

We talked about – or, well, I talked about – working together to overthrow Megatron, but she decided to feed me to her Insecticon instead.

Luckily, I managed to escape alive, but I am now in the same, awkward position again, where I need Ratchet's help to survive.

I suspect he will bring along another Autobot with him.

As long as he fixes me up – once again, in exchange for some useful information – I don't care if he brings all of Team Prime with him.

I think I hear something. Maybe it's him, arriving with the GroundBridge.

I'll update the log later.

Starscream's log

Entry #18

It was Ratchet. With Bulkhead, once again.

Once again, they almost left me to die, but I managed to bring them back by telling them about Airachnid and her Insecticon. Ratchet gave me another energon injection, which has bought me some time before I need more of the stuff.

I, er, also accidentally revealed to them that I am grounded. If it wasn't for my, ahem, situation, and if it wasn't for Prime being back on Team Prime (he now remembers being an Autobot again, thanks to moir, most certainly), I'm sure they would use the opportunity to slag me and use my remains for spare parts…that is, if any of my parts were big enough for any of them. Maybe a bit too big for Arcee...

Anyways, so I went to one of the energon mines the next day, and I think I heard one of the Vehicons saying that Breakdown is dead. Killed by Airachnid, most certainly. I remember the look on her face when we met in the mine. That is the face of someone who had just made a kill.

I wonder how Knock Out is taking the news? He just lost his Conjunx Endura, after all. He must be devastated…

Not that I care, anyway. After all, I don't know what it's like to be loved by some big hunk of junk. I do know what it's like to be pummeled by one, though. And I don't enjoy it!

Now, since nobody is listening to this other than me, I suppose I can add in a little secret…

See, while I was in the forest, after Ratchet patched me up, I found the blue bike, Arcee, all wrapped up in web, almost terminated by Airachnid.

Now, I was really mad at the spider for what she did to me before, so I fired my missiles at her, until she ran off. The fear I had about my missiles not reappearing due to my missing T-cog, well it proved to have been a pointless fear. They still appear, seconds after I launch my current missiles. So I'm not completely defenseless after all!

Ahem! Anyway, so then it was just me and the little assassin, Arcee.

I should've finished her off. She expected it, anyone would've expected it. Even I expected it.

But I didn't.

I remembered how she spared my life before – though rather closely – and so I had to pay her back. I cut open the web with my claws and then left her behind in a current truce.

It was the first time I had willingly spared an Autobot's life. Saved one, even.

And this is, by far, my longest log to date.

I'm going out to find some energon.

I'll put the log on a break until something new happens.

Starscream was used to see energon mines by barren cliffs, but this time, he found a very unusual site – by a waterfall!

It was in the middle of the day, and the sun shone at the waterfall and the blue lake below. The sunrays lit up the cliff sides in an orange tone, the trees by the lake were a bluish green color, and the sunlight shining at the pure white falling water itself created a small rainbow.

Starscream stared at the scenery in wonder. It was beautiful. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen…

He shook his head. "No more sentimentality," he scolded himself. "I need to find energon."

He found out that the blue color of the water wasn't just a reflection of the blue sky; at the bottom of the waterfall lake, there were dozens of blue energon crystals, illuminating the water, creating the incredible blue surface.

Starscream rejoiced. He couldn't believe Megatron hadn't discovered this site yet. There was even a small cave at the top of the waterfall cliff.

It wasn't the Nemesis, but this would make a pretty nice home.

Megatron must not know of this place's location, Starscream thought to himself. He simply mustn't!