Chapter 24: Dancing in the street
"I don't see why I can't move in here with you guys."
Peter sighed; this wasn't the first time Peter had heard this particular complaint from his son.
"I told you before, Si, there's not enough room. It's only a two-bedroom flat."
"So… what? I'm meant to stay on me own with granddad?"
The lift doors opened; father and son both stepped into the hallway and walked towards what was now Peter's home with Carla and Jamie.
"It won't be for much longer, I promise ya. As soon as the money from the sale of the Rovers comes through, we're gonna start looking for a bigger place. For all of us to live in together. As a family."
"Yeah, well, it better be soon, you deffo need another man in the house."
"What does that mean?" Peter playfully tousled Simon's hair. "Hey?"
Simon nodded to the package Peter was carrying.
"Umm, dad, you've been sent out to buy pastries and fruit for breakfast. Not very manly, is it?"
"If it's what my girls want."
"You're a lost cause."
Peter laughed. "I hope so."
As the pair reached the front door of the flat, they exchanged puzzled looks at the noises emanating from within.
"What on earth…?"
Peter opened the door to the sound of the radio blaring out the Motown classic "Dancing in the street"; Carla and Jamie were holding onto each other's hands, moving in time to the music, swinging each other about and laughing hysterically in-between singing along to the music.
"It doesn't matter what you wear," mother and daughter sang raucously in unison. "Just as long as you are there. So come on, every guy grab a girl, everywhere around the world."
"Si!" Jamie spotted her brother at the door and ran over to him.
"…There'll be dancing, they're dancing in the street…"
"Come dance with me, Si."
Simon hesitated when Jamie tried to drag him onto the makeshift dance floor in the middle of the living room, but Peter gave him a gentle prod.
"Go on, dance with your sister."
Simon shook his head and rolled his eyes, feigning embarrassment. Nevertheless, he smiled as Jamie took him by the hand, and he succeeded in moving his body about in a way that might be considered dancing.
Peter couldn't help but smile at the sight of his children dancing so joyously together, enjoying their new family setup.
Carla sidled up to him; she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in for a soft, sensuous kiss.
"Dance with me, Mister Barlow."
Peter placed his hands around Carla's waist and pulled her body close to his; he rocked her gently from side to side in time to the music, leaning down to kiss her neck, her cheek, her lips.
"All we need is music," Simon and Jamie were almost screaming the lyrics in their excitement; Carla and Peter turned to watch them with amused smiles. "Sweet music, there'll be music every – everywhere."
Carla rested her cheek on Peter's shoulder in blissful contentment; he kissed her hair gently and counted his blessings, all three of them.
"And you still have no idea who the buyer is?"
The newly reunited family were all sat at the dining table enjoying the pastries and fruit Peter had brought home for breakfast.
"None at all. It was a condition of the sale that they remain anonymous until we exchanged contracts."
"Which is this morning."
"Yeah," Peter sighed as he thought back over the protracted fight between himself and Toyah over the future of the Rovers ever since their relationship had ended. "You know what, Carla, I can't wait to get shot of that place. Finally get to move on from that mess."
"Not long now, ey?" Carla reached out and placed her hand gently over Peter's.
"I just wish I could avoid having to see the three wicked sisters," Peter grimaced at the thought.
"Why don't I come with you?"
"I can do this on my own, you know."
"I know, I know. I'd just be there, you know, in case one of them steps out of line. Then I'll fix 'em with me death stare and –" Carla caught the look on Peter's face and realised the extent of his worry over the morning's meeting. "Or I could just be there to hold your hand?"
Carla reached out and stroked Peter's cheek.
"Yeah, I'd like that."
"Good," Carla stood and, wrapping her arms around Peter's neck, placed a soft kiss on his cheek. "More coffee?"
Walking into the Rovers two hours later felt like entering enemy territory for Peter and Carla. True to her word, Carla held Peter's hand, which only served to increase the animosity towards the couple.
"What's she here for?" Leanne, spiteful as ever, spat her venom on seeing Carla.
"She? Who's she?" Peter challenged his ex-wife. "If you mean Carla, she is here to support me. You know, as my partner."
Leanne simply rolled her eyes and walked away, while Peter turned to Toyah. "Shall we go through the paperwork while we wait on the buyer?"
"Yeah, of course."
Peter sat down in one of the Rovers booths; Toyah went to follow him, but paused first to speak to Carla.
"You do know," Toyah spoke low so that only Carla could hear. "That you're just a rebound for Peter?"
"Is that so? Because Peter told me that every woman he's been with since I left him – and you know Peter, there would've been a few – every single one of them was a rebound from me."
Toyah didn't have a comeback ready; she simply walked away, seething with suppressed anger and frustration, from this woman who she despised, and sat down opposite Peter, the man she still loved, to formally dissolve the only thing left in the world that connected the two of them together.
It was only then that Carla noticed Eva, standing by the bar, almost in the shadows, as if she wanted to retreat from the room, from the world.
"Hey," Carla spoke kindly to Eva. "How are you?"
"Me?" Eva immediately put on a front. "Oh, I'm fantastic, you know me."
Carla looked at Eva knowingly; she herself vaguely remembered those overwhelming early few months of motherhood, the constant worry and sleep deprivation, and sensed Eva might be feeling similar.
"If you must know, I'm exhausted."
"Mmm hmm," murmured Carla in agreement.
"And…" Eva's voice broke. "I'm lonely."
"Oh, love."
"How did you do it, Carla? Be a single parent?"
"I know it's hard, doing it on your own and feeling isolated. Some days it's all you can do to get through the day without having a full-scale meltdown."
"Tell me about it."
"And then other days you do have that meltdown. But that's okay. Because there's always tomorrow. And ninety-nine times out of a hundred, tomorrow will be better than today."
"I dunno, Carla, sometimes I feel like –"
Eva's confession was interrupted by the Rovers door swinging open and the new owners sauntering through the entrance like a conquering army.
"Surprise!" Jenny Connor was delighted with the impact of her and Johnny's arrival.
"You?" Carla directed her disbelief at Johnny. "You've bought the Rovers?"
"That's right," Johnny swaggered to Peter and Toyah's table, ignoring his daughter's confused look. "Are we doing this then?"
"Well, that's it, love." Peter turned to Carla. "You ready to go?"
"Umm, give me a minute," Carla's gaze was fixed on Johnny, who was stood behind the bar surveying his new empire. "I want a word with Johnny."
"Are you sure that's a good idea?"
"I have to try, don't I?"
Carla tentatively approached the bar.
"Johnny?"
"We're not open yet."
"Can we talk?"
"You and me have nothing to talk about. Now, if you don't mind." Johnny motioned towards the door; he wanted her gone.
"How many times do you want me to apologise?"
"I don't want your apologies. Saying sorry isn't going to bring my son back."
"We're family, Johnny, we have to find a way through this."
"No. We're not family." Johnny's voice was cold. "We're just two people who live on the same street. If you want a drink, I'll be happy to serve you during opening hours. Otherwise, not interested."
Carla turned away from her father before he could see the tears that had sprung in her eyes and threatened to spill down her cheeks. She hurried over to where Peter was waiting for her, desperate to get outside and away from a room filled with people who, by and large, hated her.
"Are you okay, love?" Peter wrapped a protective arm around her.
"Not really, no."
"Carla!"
"Oh god, what now?"
Carla turned around; Eva was hurrying to speak to her, she had obviously been waiting for an opportunity.
"Listen, Carla, I was wondering if, I don't know, you might want a catch up? Now? Umm, a coffee at Roys or summat?"
"I dunno, Eva, I'm a bit done in."
"Oh, I just thought, I, umm… That's okay, maybe another time."
Eva turned and started to walk away. Carla looked at Peter wearily; he rubbed her back, encouraging her to speak.
"Eva!"
Eva turned around, hopeful; expectant.
"Coffee at Roys sounds great."
Carla wondered why Eva had been so desperate to speak to her. There they were, sat in a quiet corner of Roys Rolls, a coffee and sticky bun each on the table in front of them, and Susie laying peacefully in her pram; yet Eva was unusually reluctant to engage in conversation.
"So," Carla desperately tried to get Eva talking. "How's the new flat?"
"Yeah, it's okay."
"Right…"
Eva absently picked at her sticky bun.
"Is everything okay, Eva?"
Eva looked at Carla as if for the first time.
"Nothing's okay. And I don't know how to fix it."
Susie started grizzling in her pram; Eva ignored her daughter, or perhaps didn't hear her, Carla couldn't be sure. But, when she continued to ignore her as she started to cry at full voice, Carla couldn't help but step in and pick Susie up.
Eva watched with great interest as Carla soothed the baby, rocking her gently in her arms and making comforting noises.
"You're really good with her," Eva sounded envious. "How do you do it?"
"I've had lots of practice remember?"
"I'm hopeless with her."
"Hey, I'm sure you're not," Carla tried to reassure Eva. "Give it some time. You should've seen me when Jamie was this age. Absolutely clueless."
"Really?" Eva clung onto the hope this gave her. "I just feel so stupid most of the time. I have no idea what I'm doing."
"No one does, darlin'. That's one of the joys of motherhood, you figure it out as you go along."
"And I cry. All the time." Eva was on the verge of tears just making this confession to Carla. "And I'm worried that me being so sad is going to make Susie sad, or damaged."
"Have you talked to your doctor?"
"About what?"
"About how you're feeling?"
"I can't tell the doctor these things," Eva was horrified at the thought. "What if they call the Social? Say I'm an unfit mother?"
"That's not how it works, Eva. Doctors are there to help you, okay? And if your doctor's not helping, then you get a new one. But I really think you need to talk to someone."
"I'm talking to you."
"I mean a professional."
"Oh," Eva was scared at the prospect of sharing her feelings with a stranger. "I don't know."
"Eva, look at this gorgeous baby girl." Carla looked down at Susie in her arms and then up at Eva. "Your daughter. She needs you to be healthy. And happy. Do it for her."
Eva stared at her daughter and desperately tried to work up the courage to follow Carla's advice.
"Okay," she suddenly blurted out. "I'll go tomorrow, to the doctor."
"Good. That's good."
"Can you look after Susie while I'm there?"
"Umm, sure."
"You'll think it's a cheek but… Can you take her for the day?"
"The whole day?"
"I knew it was too much to ask, I'm sorry, forget I said anything."
"No, no, it's okay. Yeah, tomorrow will be fine." Carla leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on Susie's forehead. "Who wouldn't want to spend the day with this angel? Hey?"
"You did what?"
"I promised Eva I'd look after Susie tomorrow," Carla couldn't understand why Peter was so upset. "Is that a problem?"
"If you have to ask, then, yes, it's very much a problem."
"Peter, I –"
"Did you for one moment think how I would feel about it?"
"Umm… no, not really. I'm sorry, Peter, I don't understand."
"I thought she was my daughter. I loved her like she was my daughter. And now you want me to have her in my home…but now as a complete stranger to me? I can't do it."
"I'm sorry, I didn't think. But, I promised Eva. I can't go back on my word now. Maybe, I dunno, if you can't be around Susie, maybe you could stay with your dad tomorrow?"
"You're kicking me out?"
"No! Don't be ridiculous! I'm trying to spare your feelings."
"I'm ridiculous now, am I?"
"For god's sake, Peter! What do you want me to do? Do you want me to call Eva and cancel? You know she's struggling, don't you? Doing this on her own. And, you know what? If you ever cared about that baby like you say you did, surely you'd want to help her mother?"
Peter sighed; he hated to admit it. "You're right."
"Ooh, say that again," Carla edged over to Peter, wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him suggestively.
"You. are. right." Peter kissed the tip of Carla's nose playfully. "Don't get used to it."
"So, you're really okay with tomorrow?" Carla planted a kiss on Peter's cheek, his neck, his lips.
"I might need some more persuading."
"Oh yeah?" Carla pulled Peter's face towards hers and kissed him, her mouth open, her tongue flickering along his lips. "How long has your dad got the kids for?"
"A few hours yet," Peter responded to Carla's kisses, to Carla's tongue.
"Come on then."
Carla grabbed Peter's hand and pulled him towards the bedroom, giggling in anticipation.
"So much for Peter not wanting to be around baby Susie," Carla thought to herself.
She looked about her with satisfaction. The whole family was gathered in the living room watching a movie. Simon was draped over an armchair, half watching the movie, half playing on his phone. Jamie was snuggled up next to Carla, Snowy on her lap, eyes fixated on the television screen. And then there was Peter and Susie; Peter was stretched out on the sofa, his head on a pillow in Carla's lap. He was fast asleep. On his chest, also fast asleep, lay Susie, Peter's protective hands holding her safe.
Carla gently stroked Peter's hair; Jamie, wanting in on the action, playfully tickled her dad's nose. He swiped at her hand as his nose twitched; both Jamie and Carla stifled giggles, but thankfully Peter never woke up.
"Still no answer," as Carla placed her phone down on the countertop.
"That's over two hours now," Peter was getting worried. "You don't think something's happened to her?"
"Oh, god. I don't know what to do. Peter?"
"I'll call Leanne," Peter noticed the look on Carla's face. "What else can we do?"
His nerves already on edge, Peter jumped as soon as he heard the security buzzer sound.
"Leanne? Yeah, come in." Peter looked across at Carla, who was cradling Susie in her arms. "She's here."
"But what does she want?"
Peter shrugged; almost immediately after first speaking to Leanne fifteen minutes ago, she had called him back, she was on her way over. He unlatched the front door ready for her imminent arrival.
"After you called," Leanne explained to Peter and Carla. "I went into Eva's bedroom. I found this."
Leanne held out an envelope to Carla; it had Carla's name clearly written on it.
Carla tentatively took the envelope from Leanne's hand and quickly tore it open. Inside was a note. She read aloud:
"Carla. I'm sorry I lied to you, but it was the only way I could think of that would give me enough time to get away. I didn't go to the doctor today, I never intended to. I've tried to be a good mum to Susie, but I can't. And I love her too much to keep on hurting her with my bad mothering. Which is why I want you and Peter to have her. I want you to raise her as your own. I know Peter already loves her and when I saw you holding her yesterday in Roys, I knew that you would be a much better mother to her than I ever would. Tell Susie I'm sorry and that I love her with all my heart. Eva."