A/N: *Camera pans down to view a monstrous pile of ragged notebooks, scrawled-upon papers, mechanical pencils that have long since become empty husks with no led nor purpose. All of this and StoneByrd's haggard face is lit by a single laptop.*

"Mmm look," she says. "It's been almost a full year since I posted something on Fanfiction. Maybe we should fix that."

Haaa, in all seriousness though, guys. I've been hard at work on that next fic, Technical Difficulties, so that's taking up the bulk of my writing time... but here's a silly little piece I wrote a few weeks ago. I'm alive and kicking, I promise! As always, thanks to Astrid16 for beta-ing ~ Enjoy!

Breakfast in the Julien household was unusually quiet that autumn morning. Almost... peaceful.

Dobryak squinted at his children. Gahiji stewed over his english homework, his chin in his hand, earbuds plugged into his ears. December's oatmeal muffin was stuffed halfway into her mouth, her eyes focused through her brother's homework across the table from her.

She looked pensive. So deep in thought that she would take a bite of muffin and then forget to chew it for a few seconds. Dobryak suspected it was only a matter of time before her obviously serious thoughts worked their way out. He peered over his book from time to time, curious as to what was on her mind.

Finally, a few minutes before they would be heading off to school, December set down her muffin and fixed Dobryak with a somber look.

"Papa?" she said.

He looked over his book at her. "Yes, malyshka?"

"I think I'm in love."

A pause.

Gahiji glanced up from his homework, tugging one earbud out.

Dobryak cleared his throat. "Oh, you are?" he managed to say.

She nodded.

"In love with whom?"

"Paul Trueman."

Gahiji choked. December glared at him, and he ducked his head, covering his mouth with the back of his hand.

"Gahiji's friend?" Dobryak clarified, sticking his bookmark in and closing his book.

She nodded again. "I thought you should know, because I want to marry him when I'm twenty."

"... When you're twenty, huh."

"Yup. But for now we'll just be friends. Cuz I'm not twenty yet. But I'm pretty sure he's in love with me, too."

Dobryak glanced at Gahiji, who was stifling a fit of laughter. He caught his father's stern eye and gulped, managing a straight face.

"How do you figure?" Dobryak asked his daughter.

"I just know," December said with a shrug. "Cuz he lets me play first in bingo. And also he likes my drawings. And he's just nice to me all the time."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah. He holds my hand when we cross the street, cuz Gahiji won't."

"That's very nice of him."

"But he does scare me sometimes. He yells 'boo' a lot and does this." December raised her hands like claws in the air and made a scary face. "But then he says sorry, which is better than Gahiji does it, cuz Gahiji doesn't apologize."

"I see."

"I just love him so much," December said, picking up her muffin again and taking another bite.

Dobryak cleared his throat again. He figured he'd better take an at least semi-serious approach to this; December seemed so sincere herself.

Meanwhile, Gahiji's fist pressed against his pursed lips, eyes squeezed shut. He looked about to cry from suppressing his hysterics.

"Now, you know I don't want you dating any boys until you're older, don't you?" he said to December, shooting Gahiji another warning look that of course he didn't see.

"Oh, we're not dating, Papa," she assured him quickly.

"You're not?"

"No. I just love him is all."

Dobryak paused. "Well I suppose you know I don't want you kissing any boys, either. Not even Paul."

"I know," December said. "Only sometimes."

Gahiji made a strangled whimpering noise.

" 'Scuse me," he said, stuffing his homework into his backpack and retreating hastily from the kitchen.

"Where's he going?" December demanded.

"To school," Dobryak said smoothly, ignoring the muffled burst of laughter from the hallway. "What do you mean 'only sometimes'?"

"Only at special times," December said, squinting suspiciously at the hall door.

"Ah—I'd prefer not at all, love."

"But sometimes I want to, Papa."

"Well, of course you'll want to, sometimes." Dobryak grimaced. He'd hoped to have had a few years before this conversation.

"How about once a month," December said.

Dobryak shook his head.

"What about on holidays?"

Again, he shook his head.

"How about just on my birthday," she tried. "Once. On the cheek."

"Malyshka, I don't think you should kiss any boys until you're older."

She scowled. "How much older?"

Dobryak bit his lip to keep from grinning at her irritation. "I think Gahiji's age is a good age, don't you?"

"No!" she exclaimed.

"Well, why not?"

"Because that's so far away!"

"Only seven years, dear."

"But what if I like a different boy by then, Papa?"

"There's nothing wrong with that, is there?"

"But that means I'll never get to kiss Paul," December said miserably.

"Well at that point I imagine you'd rather kiss the boy you liked."

"Yeah, but I like Paul now, Papa."

"I'm sorry, December." Dobryak had to be firm on this point while he had the chance. "I don't want you kissing until you're Gahiji's age."

"But I'll never be Gahiji's age," December muttered.

Dobryak almost said "Exactly!"—but caught himself.

"Seventeen," he said. "When you're seventeen, you may kiss boys. ... On the cheek."

December glowered at him.

"How about when we get married," she said.

Dobryak blinked.

"Well—yes, when you're old enough to marry. That's a reasonable age."

"No, just when we get married. Not a specific age."

"That—uh."

"That way I can't kiss anyone and neither can Gahiji."

Dobryak couldn't help it. He laughed.

"It's not funny," December snapped. "I think it's unfair that Gahiji's allowed and I'm not."

"Oh, December," Dobryak sighed, recomposing himself, though he was still grinning. "It's like bedtimes, love. Gahiji goes to bed later than you do because he's older, right? It's the same thing."

"Bedtime is unfair, too," December said. "I've been saying so for years."

"Well, I'm sorry. Someday you'll be older, and I'll let you stay up, too."

"Yeah but by the time I can stay up as late as him right now, Gahiji will be staying up til midnight! I'll never catch up, Papa!"

"Oh, malyshka," Dobryak said. "I hate to break it to you, but he's up til midnight now."

"Ugh," December said, sitting back in her seat and crossing her arms. "It's not fair, Papa."

"I know, dear."

There was a brief silence.

"I'm still gonna hold his hand when we cross the street," December said darkly.

Dobryak barely managed to suppress a second chuckle. "That's reasonable."