Homecoming

"OUCH!" I screamed as simultaneously a safety pin dug into my chest and a hairpin stabbed my scalp. A mist of hair spray shot into my face and I coughed it away.

"Kendall, be more careful!" I whipped around to Kendall, who was trying to pin my bra strap to my dress to keep everything tucked in. Olivia lay on my bed watching us like we were in a fairy tale.

Ashley had spared no expense in preparing me for the dance. The football game at 3PM had gone to overtime and I didn't get home until 5:30. Nick was picking me up at 7PM for the dance so it did not leave a lot of time. Ashley had paid her hairdresser to come to our house to do my hair and makeup here. She had spent the last few months cutting styles out of magazines as inspiration for how the updo would look and what eyeshadow would complement the beautiful red dress...this was her Olympics and she was ready.

Her drinking and mixing pills hadn't let up, but the focus on the dance had harnessed all of her frenetic energy and made her giddy and hyper attentive to all things Homecoming. She was irritable and fidgety, as she poured more white wine into a glass, but at least she was smiling.

"Lauren, stand up, I think we need to change necklaces. This isn't working!" She stomped between my room and hers, digging through jewelry boxes and huffing all the way while spilling droplets of wine in her wake.

"Mom it's fine, Nick's going to be here in 20 minutes I just want to stop being fluffed!"

"I said stand up!"

I sighed and stood up. "Rory, you look so pretty!" Liv squealed from the bed.

I looked at myself in the mirror. The dress was a form-fitting one shoulder gown with a beautiful rhinestone detail at the waist. I wore a similar spangled barrette in my hair, which was swept back low and to the side with small curls hanging around my face.

My mother squinted. "Your posture is all wrong. Shoulders back, chin up. And would it kill you to smile?"

I rolled my eyes but did as I was told. Her expression softened. "Better. You should have worn a different bra, you aren't filling out the top as I had hoped."

"Mom stop, she looks beautiful!" Kendall exclaimed and I smiled and pulled her in for a hug.

"She better, the amount we spent on that dress!" My mother laughed as she took a large sip of wine from her glass.

"It was your idea to get it custom made…"I started but she shot me a dirty look and I realized that I would just be rehashing the "ungrateful" conversation and now was not the time for conflict.

Ashley stood. "Now, when you get the tiara, make sure they know to put it around the barette, I don't want the pictures of you to have it be crooked and look all out of place. That won't do." She leaned in and pressed the barette against my head to make sure it held tightly.

It wasn't worth it to remind her that I only had a 1 in 5 chance like everyone else of winning. I realized as she frantically paced around the room that she was trying her best to soak in every second of this day. It was like she felt transported back to her own high school homecoming where she'd been crowned queen and had gorgeous photos of her taken that hung in our house to this very day. She wanted that moment for herself again so badly and watching me have it was as close as she was going to get. I wished it were important to me as it was to her.

"Alright, we're switching the necklace to the pearls. The diamond is too much sparkle with the belt and barrette." She hopped up and skimmed back to her bedroom and returned with a multi strand pearl necklace. She leaned in and removed the diamond necklace I was wearing, a glassy expression on her face. She changed my accessories like she was a small child and I was a fun new fashion doll. She adjusted how the pearls fell over my neck and smiled wide. "You're ready. Photos now!" My mother grabbed my wrist and pulled me out of my room and down the stairs.

"Luke! Camera! Now! We need one of Rory by the fireplace, one of Rory outside the door, one with you, one with me, one with the girls…" Ashley started staging the living room and moving around vases of flowers to make the perfect backdrop for photos. "Kendall, I left my wine glass upstairs, be a dear and bring it down!"

I hoped Kendall would ignore her and the glass would stay out of sight. Nick hadn't seen my mother since the incident at the gas station and the last thing I needed was for him to see her drinking on top of how wound up she already was. 6:51, he would be here any minute.

My father labored into the room with the camera. "Okay, what are we doing here?" An annoyed Ashley huffed over to him and started listing off all of the shots she wanted captured. "Rory, smooth out your dress and angle yourself toward the camera, you look hippy at this angle. How many times do I have to say chin up?"

I twisted and lifted and sucked and tucked on command. At the cue of "Smile" I took a breath and tried to smile as naturally as I could, despite the uncomfortable stance. My mother smiled as Kendall appeared alongside her with her wine glass. "Girls, now you get in the photo!" Her excitement grew as we all stood together, smiling, portraying the happy image that my mother was desperate to have.

"Alright, now me." She smiled and stepped toward me. She put her arm around my waist. "Now, lean your head in toward mine, yes, like that. Luke is that good? You need to focus dear, I can't direct the photo and be in the photo. Smile brighter, Lauren, chin up!" My mother said through a clinched tooth smile. The doorbell distracted her and my senses heightened. Nick had arrived and I only prayed that Ashley would behave herself.

He entered in his black suit and looked like he was straight out of a Hollywood red carpet. He grinned when he saw me and came and kissed me on the cheek. "You look amazing, your majesty." He bowed slightly and I laughed. "Stop it, we aren't anything yet!"

"Oh Nicholas, you look so wonderful! You two are the most stunning couple!" Ashley came over to him and I noticed him recoil slightly.

"Thank you, Mrs. Scanlon." He touched her arm politely and went to shake my father's hand.

"Oh my goodness, we need to get the rest of these pictures taken! You two can't be late for your own coronation!" Ashley jumped around and fussed with each of us while continuing to micromanage every shot my father took. After nearly 15 minutes, we finally convinced her we were late and needed to be on our way.

We hopped into Nick's mustang and were on our way. He looked over at me. "You look so hot in that dress I could be convinced to just blow off the dance and rip it off you right now."

"And that'll be the last time we do it because if I miss this dance my mother will have me executed." I smiled curtly at him.

"She seemed more normal tonight so that's a relief. I was dreading going to your house."

"You could stand to be a little less honest sometimes, you know that?" I rolled my eyes.

"Uhhhh Ror, do you blame me? Your mom is off her rocker, you can't expect me to be excited to see her." His matter of fact selfishness had picked the wrong moment to rear its ugly head.

"No I just don't need constant reminders of how fucked up my house is, okay? I live there. I get it." I crossed my arms and sunk back into the seat, immediately getting stuck by the poorly fastened safety pin Kendall had tacked on.

"So what, you're going to pout now? We're literally about to pull in and you're catching an attitude?" He shook his head and I saw him grip the steering wheel tightly.

I thought about protesting again but knew it wouldn't be worth it. The harder I pushed back the longer the night would end up being. Nick had a real petulant side to him and would make this night torture if I didn't just apologize.

"Look I'm sorry, this afternoon was just a slog to get through with her. I just want to have fun tonight." I put my hand on his thigh, my fingertips grazing just high enough to make him sit up a little straighter.

"You just need a drink. I loaded a flask in the glovebox, we can split it before we go in." He nodded toward the compartment and I reached in. I pulled off the cap and blindly slugged down a gulp of what turned out to be cheap vodka. I twisted my face as I swallowed it down. Nick took it from me and chugged the remainder as he parked the car. I looked in the mirror to reapply my lipstick.

"You're lucky you're so pretty, Scanlon...I wouldn't take half your shit if you didn't look that good." He smiled, as if to indicate what he said was a joke, which I knew it wasn't. I weakly smiled back and he jumped out of the car and jogged around to open my door. I could always count on him to put on a chivalrous show in public. As he helped me out of the car, the vodka hit me just enough to bring a light, bouncy haze to the brightly lit school.

Nick had scored a timely touchdown in today's victory against Durham and was greeted with high fives and pats on the back from his friends and teammates as we entered. I smiled and accepted countless compliments on my dress and hair and not a soul could tell that we were mid-fight only moments before.

I found Theresa in a crowd off the dance floor. I tapped Nick's shoulder and signaled I was heading to see her and he kissed me on the cheek and busied himself with his friends.

"You look amazing! The dress is perfect!" She smiled as we made our way to a quieter corner of the room to catch up.

"Thanks, I'm just glad to see you honestly. Nick and I were at each other's throats in the car and I didn't want to be stuck over there reliving the football game all night."

"Ugh I'm sorry. What were you fighting about?" Tre looked concerned. She had never been Nick's biggest fan, but following her and Tony's breakup he often went out of his way to be rude to her.

"My mother's instability makes him uncomfortable and somehow that's my fault." I shrugged.

Theresa was far more dialed in than Nick on my family situation. She came from an unconventional home too and was always understanding. Her father had died in combat when she was little, leaving her mother to raise three girls alone. Her mother was a little unstable and had a lot of boyfriends, but was a good mother who always put her daughters first. Theresa's oldest sister Anita got pregnant in high school and had been churning out kids ever since, so her house was also a little chaotic. The chaos at the Gordon how was well documented and part of the reason why Tony's parents weren't wild about the idea of him getting serious with Theresa.

"Oh, I wasn't sure if it was about the other thing..." Theresa bit her lip.

"What other thing?" I raised an eyebrow. There were always ridiculous rumors going around about our crowd, so I didn't pay attention to a lot of the chatter. I wouldn't have been surprised to have my name be dropped in some ridiculous story given the attention we'd been getting over homecoming.

"It's probably nothing, but that Jenna Connors was apparently telling a bunch of girls at the game that she had given Nick something for good luck in the locker room and that's why he got the touchdown. So dumb." Theresa rolled her eyes.

I would have rolled my eyes too if the name Jenna Connors hadn't been the one mentioned. She was a junior who lived behind Nick and they'd known each other their whole lives. He used to drive her to school sometimes and it was always pretty obvious she had a crush on him. At the beginning of the year, he abruptly stopped driving her to school and they stopped acknowledging each other in the hallway, which I remember thinking was a little weird if they were just friends, but I hadn't given it another thought until this moment.

"Ror? You ok? I didn't mean to - shit I have the worst timing. I thought you knew…" Theresa put her hand to her head.

"No no it's totally fine, you know i just don't like her." I smiled. I stood on my toes and turned around and tried to spot Nick in the crowd. He was exactly where I had left him, in a pack of bros joking and laughing about something.

"You should go be seen with him...squash the rumor before it starts." Theresa smiled.

"What are you gonna do?" I knew she wasn't going to come and hang out with us that night. Tony had brought his new girlfriend, Alice Gilmore, and it would have been awkward for Theresa to tag along.

"I tagged along with Brian Donahue and his friends, I'll go chill with them. They have good grass in the car so we'll probably jet early and go hang down the meadow." I was so jealous. Brian was friends with Tre's older sister Nancy. We'd been spending more time hanging out with them than the girls from the Booster Club since her breakup. I would much rather go off and smoke a joint with Theresa and that crew than play fairy princess with Nick all night. "But I have to stay to watch you get a tiara! Your mother would never forgive me if I wasn't there to bear witness to your royal coronation."

I rolled my eyes. "I just want this to be over with. Call me tomorrow, okay?" She nodded and I turned to walk over to where Nick and Tony were hanging out.

As I reached Nick's side, Principal Fletcher took the microphone. Thank God, it looked like they were getting the King & Queen stuff over with on the earlier side. Nick put his arm around me and all nominees were called up to the stage. We all awkwardly stood smiling as the principal rambled on about how wonderful this year's group is and how all are destined for great things. And with no further ado...this year's homecoming king is…

Unsurprisingly, Nick's name rang out over the microphone. I could hear the football team break into loud, raucous cheers. Nick pumped his fists over his head and very comically had to bend very far down for the much shorter Principal Fletcher to place the crown on his head. He turned back to me and winked, as I smiled wide and clapped. "And now, Nicholas, as our new king, I think it is only fair to give you the honor of announcing to Castle Rock High School who your queen is." I took a deep breath, I knew it was coming. They wouldn't let Nick do it if the next two words out of his mouth werent…

"RORY SCANLON!" He read the paper and yelled into the microphone, dropped it and sent feedback shooting through the gymnasium and lept across the stage and picked me up to accept my crown. The crowd laughed and clapped and I made a dramatic curtsy. I helped Nick put the tiara on my head, avoiding the barrette as my mother had instructed me. I thought about her, about how this moment was all she ever wanted for me. I looked up at a smiling Nick and rather than being happy, all I could wonder was what Jenna Connors had given him for good luck before the game. We were ushered to the photographer where we posed for pictures, smiling in our crowns. Everyone congratulated us as we walked by, as if it were some kind of actual achievement.

"Your mom's gonna be over the moon." Nick leaned in and laughed. I immediately bristled at him bringing up my mother, expecting him to take another jab about her condition, but luckily he didn't. We posed for what seemed like countless photos and then we were let loose on the dance floor, for the traditional king & queen spotlight dance. A Kiss From Your Lips by the Flamingos started playing as I took Nick's hand and we made our way out to the dance floor. His teammates continued to obnoxiously cheer and I laughed as we leaned into the spectacle. He awkwardly tried to spin me around a couple of times, eliciting giggles and claps from the crowd. I'm sure it looked perfect. I'm sure my mother would be proud. As the song came to an end he went for the grand finale and tried some spin dip move that almost ended with my butt hitting the floor. We burst into laughter and he kissed me as the crowd erupted in applause.

Grateful to be out of the limelight, we stepped off to the side and were greeted by his teammates and their dates. Superficial compliments were thrown left and right and I smiled and graciously accepted them. Nick grabbed my hand and pulled me aside. "So, we need to be seen on the dance floor for another 20 minutes, 30 tops. Then we're out of here. Jake Brody's got his parents' beach house for the night, so we're heading out there. Sound good?"

I nodded. His coronation seemed to soften his mood and I hoped that it would keep up. He pulled me out onto the dance floor as "The Twist" blasted through the speakers. His hands wrapped around my waist and I tried to soak in the moment. It had been pounded into my brain nonstop since childhood that this was it, this is as good as it gets. I hoped that wasn't true, but on the off chance my mother was right, I might as well enjoy my night with the tiara.

At 8:30 on the dot, we decided to make our exits. I had convinced Nick to drop me by my house to change before we ran up to the beach. My feet were destroyed from dancing in heels and I was desperate to be in something more comfortable. He agreed as long as I promised he didn't have to go in and deal with my mother, to which I agreed.

It was a smart caveat on his part as Ashley pounced on me the second I walked in the door and made a huge fuss over the tiara and needed to know every detail of the night. She excitedly sipped from a giant glass of red wine as she peppered me with questions. I stressed to her that Nick was coming back for me in 20 minutes and that I had to change and hurry so she followed me up to my room and sat on my bed.

"They took tons of pictures, you'll get to see. They announced Nick first and the crowd went wild. Fletcher must have known it was going to be me so he let Nick announce it. He yelled my name into the microphone, turned around, picked me up and kissed me. It was nice." I tried to play it up as I knew it was all so important to her. I took off the tiara and handed it to her. She turned it over in her hand, a smile on her face.

"Oh that's fantastic...I remember when Robbie and I were crowned, back then you couldn't just plant one on a girl on the lips, but he tastefully kissed my cheek. I wore a blush colored fit and flare…" I could recite this from memory...a blush colored fit and flare satin dress with a bow on the back and we danced to Its Delovely. She continued to ramble about her own homecoming and she smiled as she reveled in her memories.

"Can you unzip me?" I turned around and my mother reached up to unzip the dress. It felt freeing to take off the gown and I was excited to slide on some jeans and tennis shoes. I stepped toward my closet to dig for new clothes and Ashley kept talking.

"So Lauren, now that you've made this impression you really need to keep your name out there. Boosters Club is ending in a few months so you'll need to pick up another club or charity cause. Homecoming is nice but Prom is the big one."

I rolled my eyes behind her back. I had just survived all of her primping and pruning and pressure over one high school dance, I needed a break before she started planning the next one.

I nodded in agreement and let her keep talking. I could feel her growing more and more excited, discussing ideas she had for my hair that would be a better fit for spring than the low bun I wore that night. A vague beep of a car horn distracted me and I realized Nick was outside. "That's Nick, I gotta jet. Thank you for waiting up and for helping me get ready." I smiled, really trying to drive home that I appreciated her help. I knew it was important to her and I didn't want to start the "ungrateful" argument again.

She smiled back, but continued to ramble on about the way her sister wore her hair to prom back in 1948 and how ridiculous it looked. I grabbed my purse, slid on some tennis shoes and bolted down the stairs and out the door. Nick laughed as I hopped in the passenger seat. "I appreciate the spring in your step to assure a quick exit."

I leaned over and opened the glove box where he had kept the flask earlier. As I had suspected he had refilled it. "Figured you might want a road soda to pregame." I nodded and enthusiastically knocked back a gulp as he backed down my driveway. I cracked the window and Nick turned up the radio and we headed toward the beach. He put his hand on my leg. "Kinda sad that you had to change...I was holding on to hopes of ripping that dress off you...good thing Jake's place is huge, I'm sure we'll be able to get some alone time in." It wasn't until he mentioned being alone that I remembered what Theresa had mentioned about Jenna Connors. It stung for a moment, but as i looked over at Nick with a mischievous grin on his face it was easy to push the dumb rumor out of my head. I took another shot from the flask as he pulled onto the interstate and we grew excited to keep the party going.