Author is a horrible person that has not written anyhting for far too long and produced this horor (I regret everything)
Disclaimer : if you've heard of it before, it's not mine! (so like nothing mentioned in this besides Nami)
Warning : language, sexual assault that's nothing graphic but still some pretty heavy stuff and the violence typical to this fanfic and the death note-verse.
August 26th, 2003
She was going to vomit, hopefully on his shiny shoes.
"It's only polite to offer a name when one is given," there was a chuckle, right she had stayed silent for too long.
"Sorry, sorry." She grinned bashfully, a cute little thing with her cheeks flushed pink. "Anamiya Misaki."
"Nice to meet you," it was something out of a horror movie, the way he kept his lips quirked up in the picture perfect model student. Would she not known him from the other side of a screen, she would not have been searching for that brief glimpse of annoyance and disdain that flashed when she introduced herself.
What a sweet talking bastard.
She had to fight off the urge to want to prove him wrong, teach the little brat a lesson about not underestimating people. (especially not very dead little girls)
"Are you from around here?" She nibbled on a tasty, if a bit stale cinnamon roll and shook her head almost demurely.
"Not this part of Tokyo no, just visiting an old friend." Not really, she hardly knew Hotaru. "I'm assuming you are? Isn't it a bit late for a night stroll?"
"Ah," he rubbed the back of his neck. "I got off cram school and needed a pick me up." She almost wrinkled her nose, she had never understood the appeal of cram school during summer break.
Some people were addicted to pain if anything else, "Preparing for college huh? What do you want to major in?"
"I'm leaning towards criminology, but I'm still not quite sure." Lie, there was a steely glint in his eyes. Something firm and almost idealistic seemed to ooze out of his person, determination personified. Something bitter welled up, this looked like someone setting out to change the world for the better.
Not a mass murderer.
She briefly wonders who's the real monster, this boy, her admittedly horrible self or this rotten world for disfiguring them both to the point of inexplicable acts.
But then again, nobody enters the world and remains unscathed for long. Excuses hardly make for redemption, they don't mean anything.
"It suits you." The coffee is almost lukewarm by now, something less like his earlier condescension and more like actual annoyance flashes in his expression. She almost smiles for real this time.
"You hardly know me," the rather harsh, if truthful, words are spoken softly and politely as to mask said annoyance.
She knows far more than he thinks, she might know more about Light Yagami than he does at this point.
"You've been eyeing my book ever since we sat down," one of John Grisham's finest in it's original language. "You helped that girl earlier, I think it's safe to say you're a justice-oriented individual. Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong."
He blinks slowly and she can see the gears turning in his head, "You aren't...but maybe you put too much fate in me for a book and some manners."
"It's merely an observation, not much of expectations in you. Don't worry," he looks almost insulted and she cracks a smile.
"That's...understandable." She almost tells him that it's hard to expect anything less than the worst from him, less than a ruthless killer who would push his ideals to the point of killing innocents who oppose him. Instead, she assures him it's a joke (it was not) and allows him to read the back cover of her book.
(the original Misa was cute, cute and funny)
(she is not)
"Do you enjoy reading in English often?" he asks and she's not sure if he's actually interested or not, she doesn't know if he's genuine or not and that scares the shit out of her.
"I do, it's the most spoken language there is and well, I find it pleasant to read." It helped that Maria had once been native to New Mexico. Needless to say, Japanese was a bitch to learn.
"Not many are fluent with it, they don't find it useful." People were always the same, most of her once upon a time classmates hadn't bothered with their French classes either. Yet...
"I've found that people can surprise you," she thinks of Nami and herself, who plays and plays with expectations so people underestimate her. "Especially those you sell out short, I think the ones who seem like they would pose a danger are more likely to become predictable."
"You must adore chess." She hates it actually, Misa laughs. "You sound like you're playing a war game."
Not much of a game, that's more of you or L's thing darling.
"Ha, busted. I'm always up for a good game, but..." she smiles shyly, as if hesitating to speak up. "Shouldn't you be getting home? Cram school ended a while ago and I'm sure your family is worried."
She looks almost unwilling to see him go, she wants nothing more than for him to disappear. The next option was her feigning a family emergency or a stomachache - anything to get away.
Pale eyes shine in the dimly lit room, "My dad's working late and my mom's been wishing for me to go out more, she'll be thrilled."
Fuck this. Why didn't he take the opportunity to leave?!
Maybe she should tone up the dumb-defenceless-uninteresting thing? Like double it?
"Hm, not the social type then?" he grinned charmingly before basically calling all his classmates idiots the most polite way possible. What a sweet young man, a voice inside her head cackled.
(just as she is a sweet young girl - yeah right)
They talked, safe subjects ranging from her supposed love of chess to her book. Light Yagami made for good conversation, smart and polite. The pace is easy and she even found herself reluctant to get herself an excuse to leave, this boy was good. From the other side of a screen she'd never understood how he could trick so many people, but she could see it now.
Charisma he had in spades. He knew how to play the world to fit his needs.
It was all so fascinating. How sometimes his lips would quirk down for half a second derisively or how she would catch him look away when bored by her shallow trail of conversation.
If his act was so polished at sixteen or seventeen, then she could see how the mightiest would fall at his feet in the future.
(blood pools at his feet, a shadow of death cast over him)
"A raccoon really?" Hazel eyes shine, cheeks flush as she laughs. Light is flattered by the girl's attention, despite it not being close to the first crush of the sort. Misaki's nice though, smart and sensible.
Yes, the teenager thinks, far from as annoying as those other girls.
"Almost gave my mom a heart attack. Sayu always liked animals, but still a wild raccoon..." Misa claps her hands in front of her mouth as she giggles.
"She sounds like a sweet girl."
A sweet, adorable little girl that didn't deserve to be captured by the mafia, lose her father, only to find out her brother was Kira after his death all in the span of a few years -
(her arms don't hold the strength to advance the wheelchair on her own at first)
Great, the nausea is back.
She finishes her second cup of coffee to wash over the bitter taste of regret and tragedy.
"You going to take another?" Light asks her, taking an elegant sip of his own. "It's almost midnight already."
"Unhealthy I know," she says easily. "I was actually thinking of taking one to go, it's getting late."
"Right, I should too..." The way he says it is an invitation to retreat, to ask him to stay. She doesn't, her phone ringing stops any possible reaction of hers.
"Just...I have to pick this up." Misa gets out the building, right in front where Light can still see her, but not hear. "Want me to pick you up?"
"Mi-Misa?.." There's something wrong with Nami's voice and she frowns, the brunette knows better than to get shitfaced drunk in some place so far from home. I should've just stayed with her. "I-I..!"
She freezes when her friend's voice cracks, sobs tumbling out from the other line. "Nami? Darling breathe, I'm coming. You still at Suzuki's place?"
Light comes out, a coffee that looks like it's for her in hand and a charming grin in place, "Is there something wrong?"
"Are you in the same place? Na-, babe tell me what you see." She spares a look for the teenage boy, "Tell me what happened, are you alone?"
"Walls,"she blurts out. "I'm inside, at Hotaru's I just..." More sobs and shaky breaths. "I can't find some of my clothes God, Misa I stink and -"
Her heart does this thing where it jumps out of her throat and her stomach pummels.
"Shh, can you breathe in slowly for me? I'll be there in a minute." Just as she's about to start the car, a figure she had forgotten about steps in front of her car with a panicked expression. She swears loudly, I should just run him over.
"Wait! Wait, whatever is happening seems pretty bad." Screw running him over, she will enjoy cutting off his pretty face. "My father's a police officer, I can help." She's not sure she believes him, she still lets him sit on the passenger seat all the while whispering reassurances to Nami.
"Who's that?! Misa who is that?!" The glare she pines Yagami with could've frozen hell over, he snaps his mouth shut.
"Nobody important baby, just someone who'll help you okay? Did you find your stuff?" The car roars to life, rolling down the two streets separating her from Hotaru's apartment. Light pales at the speed the engine is moving at, he screams when they almost hit a cat.
"Ye-yeah, my top's all torn up." Misa feels lightheaded, yet instead of losing focus it makes her thoughts organize themselves more easily. The most important one being of course : how she'll get away with murder.
"Oh God, Misa I -" Nami kneels over, vomiting all over some pretty carpet she doesn't recognize. The sobs start anew and not even her best friend in the whole wide world can make her feel better.
The engine stops abruptly and Misa literally runs out as to climb the step leading to Hotaru's home, talking into the phone all the while ignoring Light.
Said boy eyes the complex with disgust, the exterior full of inebriated young adults either smoking of throwing up on the well-cut grass. He's pretty sure some people are using the small backyard the place has for bedroom appropriate activities.
Ugh, great. Puke almost lands on his shoes and he begins contemplating his life choices as a good citizen.
Misa ignores all of this in favor of barging in the place, passing by a chirpy Hotaru without a care. She'll be having some words with that girl later, preferably without some too loud music blasting in her ears.
She shoves away people crowding the halls of the admittedly big apartment, elbows digging into flesh as Light tries to keep up with her pace. "Whoa! Damn girl, that is some ass-" she waves off the offending arm wrapping around her.
"Pass." Misa feels herself shudder as the arm comes back with twice as much force in it's grip on her, not out of fright don't you worry. The shudder was more of her imagining bashing his skull with a beer bottle. "Awn come on sweet cheeks! I'm sure I could show you a good time!"
(are there any baseball bats available?)
"I doubt it. Please let go of me" The man frowned, ugly features twisting into an even more ugly picture. She sees a few people look at the both of the hesitantly, not sure if intervening on her behalf was worth it. (rottenrottenrotten)
"Listen here you bitch-!" That's when her knight in shining armor shows up, undeniably traumatized.
"I would appreciate you letting go of my friend here." There's definitely a hint of warning in that tone, it makes her want to laugh.
"Huh?! Defending your little girlfriend?" If Light is tall for a teenager, this man is huge. With at least a few inches on Light and bulging muscles. She spots the hall where bedrooms are situated and freezes, she does not have time for this.
Misa grabs the guy's wrist gently, firmly removing it from around her. He lets her, almost curiously.
She then swept his feet from underneath him with a powerful play of legs, the man losing balance before ungracefully falling to the floor on his back. She quickly brings herself down, blocking his lower limbs with her own and holding her forearm against his throat.
"I have a knife in my boot, want to bet if I'll use it?" Her fingers almost playfully tickle the underside of his jaw as she jumps back up on her two feet. "Ready to go?"
Yagami blinks in shock at the easy takedown, the bulky man groaning in pain on the floor both because of her swift actions and his own consumption. A few send her bewildered glances, before laughing or even giving her thumbs up as they return to their previous occupation.
"Wha-what how? You -" She grabs him, dragging him out of the crowd. Then, she directs her attention to her phone, Nami still on the line if she had stayed silent for awhile. The blonde slams open the first bedroom door open, unsurprisingly finding a couple on the bed.
She rolls her eyes, going to open the door leading to Hotaru's room before thinking against it. Instead, she knocks "Darling? It's me, if you're there open up please."
What is one supposed to do in such a situation? Limit physical contact? Talk calmly?
The answer comes in the form of her friend barreling out of the room, arms winding around Misa like a vice. "Shh..." thin fingers worked their way through auburn locks, Nami burying her face in the crook of her friend's neck.
"I-I was so-so scared..!" The girl's a mess, if anything. With shaking limbs and clothes more than just messy if the stains and rips are anything to go by.
She slides them back up inside Hotaru's room slowly, fingers that are hidden behind her back beckoning Light forward. Misa kisses the girl's temple and sits them on the small couch instead of the bed when Nami freezes at the sight of it, the brunette is fine with gentle hands on her arms, around her waist but will tense at touch around the hips or back Misa learns.
She's going to be sick, even Light Yagami - future mass murderer extraordinaire looks tinted with green.
Nami's hair is all knotted, mascara smudged all around her eyes, those pale brownish eyes of hers are red and bloodshot.
(rottenrottenrotten)
"Here," the blonde takes off her oversized cream colored sweater before offering it to her friend who's shirt is unwearable and somewhere on the floor which leaves her only in her bra and shivering.
"I...out." Nami dazedly falls back into the soft material of the couch. "Misa I need to get out of here-!" Her breathing is labored, eyes blown wide open.
(Misa Amane hates herself for the first time in this body, hate is rot crawling up her throat and numbers bleeding above faces)
She nods, slowly gathering the girl in her arms and her best friend's arms loop around her shoulders. Despite being taller, Nami's stature is thin and the girl is light. "We'll get you out, can he take your stuff darling?" she supports the girl's weight with hands behind her knees and as high as she can behind her back.
Hate is easy, so is anger.
(she instead focuses on the shaking girl in her arms, on loving that girl as much as she can)
"Yeah..." Misa hums an old song of hers under her breath, hating that they have to pass the living room to reach the door letting them out of Hotaru's apartment.
Hazel eyes narrow, "Close your eyes, hide your face if you want." The girl does so, hiding tear-stained features in her best friend's neck and Misa goes back to humming even as the music overpowers her soft, hushed voice. Hotaru's worried voice calling after the three of them making her so very angry for a brief second.
(rip out her throat, use her vocal cords as strings-!)
"Ignore her." She listens to Nami, treating the girl like a precious porcelain doll as they get out of the blasted building. "I...just get me home."
Misa will do anything the girl wants, anything. The young Amane also knows how the judicial system works, how it fails most of victims like these. "We can do that, or we can call the police or go to a hospital. Whatever you want."
Light's face closes up, outraged at her words.
The side glance she gives him is stony, ice-cold. Nothing cute or dumb or shallow, it's a look that says : I will strike you down this instant because I can and you will not say a damn thing.
Because if Light Yagami is not Kira ( yet ) the desire for crimes to be punished is still there. Misa Amane may not know much about justice, but she does know the system and knows it does not guarantee much for her friend.
Not justice, not revenge, nothing.
It's quite hilarious, how the not yet Kira can trust so much into justice even going as far as to take it into his own hands. When she, a law student, has nothing of his self-righteousness or of his sense of right and wrong. The structure - the foundation society is built on might just be the one thing the likes of Kira or L will never beat, will never even shake.
She will not try, although watching them try might just prove entertaining.
(Misa is made of death, instincts and everything that is so very deeply human she'd make the devil wince)
Because the system is cruel in how it let's go of the guilty, hell it even sometimes punishes the innocent. The system is nothing but a reflection of human nature after all, flawed, good when it well pleases and bad when it sees fit.
It protects what and who it wants to protect, the judicial system is not a person but is might as well be. (selfish to the core)
So she will not be taking any of the boy's bullshit, especially not now.
(numbers shift, hemorrhage into something else)
She does not notice, what a shame.
"...hospital." Nami finally rasps out when she settles on the passenger seat of her best friend's car. "I'm pretty sure I was drugged, I don't remember much. I'll decide what to do later."
Press charge, get over it.
(nails on a chalkboard, wind picking up)
Misa's crimson nails dig into the wheel, almost piercing the material. "Perfect, Yagami where's the nearest one?" He startles, still lost in his thoughts and not expecting her to ask. He gives them direction, stubbornly keeping his gaze on hers and refusing to look at Nami.
Human suffering too ugly for you to look at Kira? She nods and rides off, manicured hand to reach out for Nami's trembling one.
"We'll get through this," even if she has to get blood underneath her nails, to destroy everything in her way. "I love you."
Nami lets out something like a pained laugh and it is not beautiful, it is not even a little bit pretty. Misa's chest still warms with something like marrow-deep affection and wonder - amazed like one would not believe by that girl. "Always."
"Always," is not forever but it's a good place to start.
(it's more than enough)