Chapter 17

Somewhere around the City of Stone, Red and Kharkov find a private place that was near to the forest.

"What are we going to talk about Red?"

"You know what I'm going to talk about." Red leaned at the wall. "We're going to discuss about her."

"Look I know I may sound like I'm going soft on her but give her a chance."

"You know that I'm right about her." Red pointed at Kharkov. "This is part of the process and we need to think forward."

"You're giving up hope on her too early, just let her adjust and she will do better."

"Every Siren can do better, everyone can do better." Red argued. "The only problem is that we don't search for Siren that can do better. We search for Siren that is qualified to train with The Host. Maya's not qualified."

"Oh come on. You're standards are just not realistic." Kharkov groaned.

"No, this is part of the job." Red looked at Kharkov straight to the eyes. "This is not the first and certainly not the last. We need to think about what's our next move. Which planet should we go search and who's our next candidate, that's our priority right now not her."

"She's our responsibility Red, remember that. She's a Siren and we are supposed to help Sirens." Kharkov objected.

"Maya may be a Siren but our priority is the Siren Race, not just a Siren."

"We still have a few hours to go."

"God damn it, remember the last time that we give a chance to a Siren like her? Did you forget what happened?"

Kharkov folded his arms together. "Riza, yes I remember her."

"Tell me, what happened to her last time." Red raised one brow.

"She umm she made a mistake…." Kharkov bit his lip trying to remember. "And things weren't good at the time."

"Bullshit." Red rolled his eyes. "You let her win. You let her win and because we didn't know that you let her win, she died. She died on while going through the rigorous training. That also happened to me when I give Meeya a chance and she also died. You want Maya to die just like the other two?"

"She's different Red." Kharkov was almost pleading. "You know just by seeing her that she's different."

"Seeing is believing. Sometimes. I don't want her to die just like the last two that we give a chance. Is the way it is Kharkov and there's nothing we could do about it." Red moved away from the wall and stand close to Kharkov. "Just face it Kharkov. She's just like the red one, we should have known better."

"They knew what they sign up for and Maya know what she signed up for. If they were to die then that is the way it is Red."

"Look, I don't want someone daughter, mother, friend or family die when we could do something about it." Red raised his hands. "That's all I want. We learned that the hard way with the last two, I don't want her to be the third. You know what I'm doing is because of goodwill, that's it. I don't care about the ones that didn't make it because they weren't good enough. I care about those who die when we know that she doesn't cut it."

"Chyorts!" Kharkov hissed then sighed to release the frustration away. "I get it… but could you at least give her the chance till sundown. The worst thing that could happen is that you waste some energy. Can you do that my friend?"

Red nodded. "Don't worry I'll do it."

"Poor girl…" Kharkov sighed again. "So who's next in line?"

"Two this time. A miracle in my opinion." Red put his hands on his waist. "Both of them are twins, one male and one female."

"Did the male survived?"

"Yes he did and he managed to get some good traits from the other twin."

"Where are they at?"

"Nekerotafeyo."

"Humphh…" Kharkov shook his head. "What type of people lives in that ghost planet? I'm not touching any planet that Nyriad once step foot."

"It's part of the job Kharkov plus why should you be surprised about the planet. Twin Sirens is already a bizarre case. Nyriad's dead and there's nothing she can do about it. So the trip is just another walk in the park."

"She's dead and alive at the same time." Kharkov reminded.

"Nobody has seen her for a long time. There's nothing to worry about." Red waved it off.

"Look, forget about the twins can you Red?" Kharkov looked at Red. "Maya is still our priority. Give her the chance, she already commit a few months on the journey."

"Alright, alright, till sundown. There's still time but I won't go easy on her."

"Deal."

"Alright then, finally we agree on something." Red moved away from Kharkov and went on a certain direction. "I'm gonna fill my belly up, meet you back at the Fields."

"Sure."

Hiding behind a tree; Maya overheard the whole conversation. Hearing the discussion saddened her, she was a failure and it was only a matter of time that she would be disqualified. She moved away from the scene so that she won't get caught. Things were already bad as it is and getting caught was the last thing that she wanted to happen. Maya walked to a dirt path that lead her to the fields through the forest, she wanted alone time more than ever. Her body was tensed, walking at a quick pace as if running away from something. But there was nothing to run away. She had worked all her life to learn her Siren race but all was coming to an end. It was just a matter of time that it was official.

Maya was thinking many things, not one of them were positive. She started to think about how she could do better in the past. Regret, anger and sadness came at her at all directions. Like knives stabbed to the heart, she couldn't breathe normally. Why was she so stupid thinking that it was all going to be easy? She shouldn't have been so enthusiastic since the beginning. The Searchers must have judged her ever since the beginning and see her as an incompetent fool. She should have been serious since the beginning. Things would be different had she didn't underestimate the training. She fisted her hands and curled her lips, disappointed towards herself.

All the years that she went through. All the years at The Abbey, being prayed as a goddess but actually being used by the priests. Her pure intentions on wanting to learn her race was perverted into controlling the people of Athenas. She was feared by the masses and had to live life alone. The loneliness that she had to go through the years, she didn't complain. Being used to make people obey by the so called Brothers, she endured. She was silent in suffering through all the years, believing that one day she would get the opportunity to learn her race from her own people. She finally got the chance today but all was wasted. There was no one to blame except herself. It was all her fault. The amount of self-hate that she has could not be expressed through words. It could not be said with it.

She stopped walking and stoop her head down. Looking at her two feet; fisting her hands with all her might. The pressure building in her chest… The colour of her face turned red. Maya's emotion was going haywire. She looked to her left and focused at a particular tree. She raised her left hand and the marks glowed furiously. The tree was sturdy and had a wide base. One moment it was normal the next it was destroyed in an instant. All the fibres in the tree went inside out. Splinter went everywhere but stay stationary in the orb. Even the roots under the ground were pulled out, as if physics didn't exist. The tree was crushed into the smallest pieces that can be seen by the human eye, encased in a dark orb that Maya had created.

Maya's eyes glowed even more, brows furrowed as close to each other, the tree was crushed. All her rage being vented to the tree, she started to calm down and her power weakens. The glow disappeared and her rage disappeared with it. Her tense shoulders slumped down and she downed her head again, now her heart was filled with sadness. Maya crouched down and covered her face with both of her hands. Making small whimpers that was not by her consent. But emotions can overwhelm even the strongest persons. Be it man or woman.

During her weak state, she felt a warm touch on top of her head. The hand petted Maya softly. She looked up and saw The Host.

"You seemed to be in a bad mood little one." Akari spoke softly, she continued petting. "Are you okay?"

"Akari!" Maya was surprised with Akari's appearance. She got up and wiped all the tears and snot that didn't flowed out yet. "I'm sorry abou-"

"There are a lot of things happening in your mind. Like a wardrobe, filled with many unworn clothes that is just there just to hang and fill the space." Akari patted her body that was covered in soil and dust, the result of sparring with Red. "Tsk tsk tsk, I wonder why you are so cluttered."

Maya opened her mouth but no words came out. Her mouth slowly closed and she remained silent.

"Have you eaten?" Akari finished with cleaning Maya and looked at her with a pleasing smile.

"I have Host Akari." Maya stood straight and spoke clearly.

Akari covered her mouth and giggled. "Then I wonder what is bothering so much that a tree has to be destroyed." She directed her head towards the destroyed fauna.

Maya looked at the tree she destroyed and has no explanation about it. Like someone punching a wooden door with raging emotions, once the anger faded, one started to wonder why one punched the door in the first place. Maya looked at her hand then turned back to The Host. "I was angry at myself. I'm a failure."

"Really now?" Akari was intrigued. "You failed but you didn't start yet. How is that even possible?"

Maya was seeing The Host wisdom and it made her uneasy heart calm itself.

"Little one," Akari advised and touched Maya's hands. "You are thinking too much. Thinkers are great but remember that they have grey hair and grey hair is not good for the looks. Especially for someone beautiful like you."

Maya laughed in her breath and a small smile appeared.

"See, all worries gone when the useless thinking is gone." Akari put her hand on Maya's cheek and wiped the tear on her eyelashes. "There, that's the last one."

Maya sighed and relieved that Akari was there to console her. Then to her surprise, Akari moved closer and hugged Maya. She was clueless at first but the warmth of her body and pats on the back made Maya realized on how much she yearned for someone company. Maya wrapped her arms on Akari's waist and rested her chin on Akari's shoulder. She closed her eyes and breathed in; the fragrance of Akari's hair was a nice addition.

"I'm not okay…." Maya confessed. "Not even one bit…."

"That's not that hard isn't it?" Akari said. "Tell me all the worries."

"I… don't know what I'm going to do next Host." Maya embraced Akari even tighter. "It's my entire fault that I'm going to fail and there's nothing I can do about it. I put all my life in hopes that I could learn about my race and yet I'm not good enough to learn it. Even though I have given my all, it's not enough. What should I do Host Akari, I don't know what to do. Please give me some guidance and what should I do next."

"Continue on sparring then." Akari separated the hug and looked at Maya. "You are going to fail but you didn't fail yet. And if you didn't fail yet then that means there is still a chance for you to succeed."

Maya opened her eyes and sighed, still hopeless of her situation. "I've tried everything, I can't beat him."

"Promise me that you will still spar then I will tell you how to be stronger."

She was having doubts but she has nothing to lose. "I promise."

Akari pulled Maya's left hand and put her finger on Maya's marks. "Let your power control you and let it do the job."

"What?" Maya was surprised with the advice given.

"That's all from me, other than that is up to you." Akari walked away. "Good luck Maya."

Maya turned to her back and looked Akari with the most confused face. "What does that even mean?" She called. But there was no answer.

Maya was left alone; she pondered her Siren mark and thought long about what Akari had said. She couldn't understand though she won't forget it. Maya turned to the side and looked at the tree that she had destroyed.

Maybe Akari was on to something…