Another long chapter. Thank you for reading, as always.
It was challenging to have the characters talk about their feelings, but I hope I did a decent job.
"Tanuma!" he called, bicycle schreeching as he braked. "Tanuma! W-ahah, watch out! Tanuma!"
There was a loud crash, accompanied by groans. Tanuma turned switfly with wide eyes, having narrowly avoided the incoming wreck. He spotted the bicycle, with the front deep inside a thorny bush, its back tyre sticking out and still spinning with the remnants of kinetic energy. Natsume was sprawled on the ground next to it, struggling to crawl back to his legs.
"Wh-What are you doing?!" Tanuma exclaimed, rushing to his side. He immediately grabbed Natsume's wrist, having noticed the red blood that had started coming out from the badly scathed skin. "Aa-aah, your arm is all scratched up!" he yelled in horror, tracing the wound from Natsume's palm all the way up to the boy's elbow. Natsume winced at the act, and Tanuma withrew his fingers. "Sorry!"
"It's okay," Natsume wiped the dirt off his knees, still frowning from the pain. "Tanuma, I read your letter."
Tanuma's eyes fell. He took a step back and his shoudlers sagged.
"I see."
"I'm not angry. I am not troubled at all. I promise," Natsume told him, eyes glimmering with straightforward honesty.
Tanuma plopped on the ground next to him in defeat, leaving the bicycle in between them, its hanging tyre a slow-spinning barrier of beams between their faces. They stayed silent, each watching the empty road. The sun couldn't reach them under the oak tress. The cicadas went on with their mad orchestra, somewhat comforting the boys with the message of summer that they sung about ever so passionately, oblivious to the awkward situation unfolding at the roots of their hometree.
"...I understand that it's weird though..." Tanuma mumbled, fidgeting awkwardly with the grass blades by his ankles.
"I'm weird too. Did you forget? My life is all about weird things," Natsume remarked defiantly, eyes fixated in the distance. "Over there" he pointed.
Tanuma looked but saw nothing but the trees across the road, the forest extending into darker shades of green the further the eye tried to pierce.
"There's something small," Natsume continued, "hopping on that branch. Ah-" There was a snap, and a small twig fell on the ground, Tanuma noticed. "-He fell... Well he should have seen it coming... Hoping on that branch so furiously... I wonder why... Isn't that weird... I don't understand."
"Natsume..."
"I don't understand it."
Tanuma sensed an alarming change of tone in his friend's voice. He finally looked at Natsume's face. Instantly, something inside him crumbled. "Why are you crying..." That should be me. Natsume's face was adorned with such sadness. Even that constant fake smile of his had given place to curled, trembling lips. Drops slid down his cheeks. Natsume cried silently, the face showing what the voice barely managed to conceal.
"I don't understand it... I know what the words mean, but I don't understand. What you meant by writing 'I like you'."
"That's fine-"
"I don't understand. You said I'm important to you... is it the same as the importance that you have for me? I met someone my age who knew, who was aware of the peculiarity of the world that no one else could tell was there... It was the first time I had friends who understood. You and Taki, both of you helped me out so many times. And we had so much fun... I figured you were one of the most important people. I don't know why. Lots of people have been kind to me. But you are, somehow, someone I want to know more, to be with, to have fun with more. You are always there, telling me I can rely on you... Tanuma, you are someone I want to be happy and well, always. Is it that kind of importance? I don't understand how it is that someone could see me this way... "
Tanuma grabbed the bicycle's hanging tyre, which had continued its slow revolution due to the chilly evening breeze, pulling it to a stop. The motionless metal beams of the tyre allowed for the two boys to look at each other better at last.
"I meant what I said," Tanuma spoke firmly "You are important to me. More than most poeple. You are always kind, and always trying on your own. And I wish I could make you see at yourself through my eyes for a second. But all I can do is tell you... And all that you just said, it means a lot. It means an awfully lot. I wish for you to be happy and well, too. So it's alright, Natsume. You don't have to think about it any more. I am very glad we met. I am very glad we became important people in each others' lives. I am happy to be your friend."
"I'm sorry Tanuma... I'm sorry..."
"It's okay. It's really okay. You don't have to think about it anymore, okay?"
They fell silent again, looking at the emptiness in front of them.
Tanuma didn't want to think about it either. He didn't understand Natsume's reply fully. But Natsume himself didn't understand either, so it was to be expected. Tanuma felt guilty for having brought such confusion to his friend, even making him cry. If only he had stayed quiet...
"It's not that... Tanuma... I too li-"
The black-haired boy cried out in agony suddenly and clutched his head between his knees, a strong thrombing pain in the back of his head shadowing over all his other senses.
"Tanuma!" Natsume called, springing up from the ground.
"SmeLLs NiCe"
Something slithered over from the trees behind them, growing in size - a thick shadow figure with hollow eyes started to form a feet away, a big mouth of darkness slowly opening to reveal a few jagged teeth and a serpentine tongue.
"I sMeLL hUmAn bLoOd. PoWeRfUL. NAmE.. GiVE BaCK NAME NOW!"
"Stay away!"
"I EAT! EAT YOU! NATSUME OF THE YUUJINCHOU!"
As the darkness pounced, Natsume made a run towards Tanuma, who was withering on the ground, and, making sure he was shielding him, raised his arm and punched with full force, eyes closed tight and heart racing from adrenaline in his chest.
"ArGH! CuRse yOu... CURSE YOU! CURSE! CURSE!" the creature screeched, taking a few steps back as it held its aching head.
The momentary loss of power from the creature made Tanuma's ache lessen. He struggled to get back on his legs, hand still massaging his head's side.
"I'm sorry, Tanuma! Can you run?"
"I think so..."
"We have to go!" Natsume grabbed his friend's hand and lead him on to a safe direction, glancing over his shoulder to make sure they weren't followed.
The two ran into the forest, jumping over rocks and intertwining tree roots, pushing aside vines and branches. The rough footsteps on the crunchy leaf-covered forest floor and heavy breathing echoed in the green world, loud and hectic.
The roars and screams that only Natsume could hear from the monster behind them eventually faded away, leaving only the murmurs of rustling tree trops. With the danger away and their fatigue growing, the two boys slowed down to a sluggish jog.
"Are you alright, Tanuma?" Natsume asked through the panting.
"My headache's gone now," he replied and paused, dragging Natsume to a stop. They were still holding hands. Normally it was nothing to be embarassed about, but due to the whole confession situation, it felt like someone had poked Tanuma's soul with a stick and laughed down at it. Immediately, he let go with a sharp hiss, looking down in shame.
Natsume was startled by the abrupt motion. He took a step back and also looked away, one of those soft, questionable, sad smiles appearing on his face again. "It's safe here. It won't come after us," He said, exhaling deeply.
"You left your bicycle behind."
"I'll get it later."
"Won't it be dangerous? What if it's waiting back there?"
"I'll get it with Nyanko-sesnei. It's going to be alright," Natsume assured.
"...Okay." Tanuma sighed in defeat.
Natsume didn't like it. His friend was angry. But most importatnly, he looked sad, with that deep, unhappy frown. "There's a water spring not far from here. Want to go?" he suggested, in an effort to change the subject.
Tanuma nodded. "My throat feels dry."
They started walking again, side by side, dragging their feet lazily. The sweat on their backs was starting to disappear, cooling them off under the shade of the forest. Sunlight still peeked throught he holes, a checkered yellow green everywhere. It was beautiful, now that they weren't running for their lives.
"Some of them that come after me, they want me to return something that my grandmother took from them a long time ago." Natsume said suddenly after a minute of silence. "It's a very precious thing that she used to take away. Most of them just ask me to return it. But some of them are angr.. That's why it's dangerous. I'm sorry you had to get caught up in that, Tanuma."
They were silent again. Natsume didn't seem like he was going to explain anything else. But Tanuma was grateful for every bit that his friend would open up. He shook his head. "I'm sorry you have to deal with it on your own every time... I don't quite understand everything. But thanks. For telling me."
Nobody spoke. But Tanuma's heart skipped a beat when soft fingers shyly brushed by his. He didn't pull away, and ever so hesitantly, his own fingers seeked out the warmth. They didn't look at each other's blushed and tense faces, but let their hands slowly join, blindly. For the first few seconds, the hold felt fragile. But it grew firm, a source of assurance, a source of security for the both of them. It was unlike their normal physical contact. This one felt unusually intimate and trusting.
They let go when they reached the spring, not long after, and they both drank the soothingly cold water and splashed their faces with newfound tranquility. Natsume cleaned his scratches too. They walked back with any tension gone entirely, talking about school, the movies and their summer plans, how they had done in the exams, about the teachers, joked about Nishimura's arcade-game obsession, and eventually even exchanged opinions about bean paste, until finally, they parted ways like they always did, with a wave and a smile, and a 'see you again' promise.
"Don't forget the bicycle!" Tanuma shouted, his hand still continuing the wave.
"I won't!" Natsume shouted back.
Touko-san's food must have run cold... , he thought, picking up his pace. His insides felt fluffy. He felt like a child that had been snuggling into a blanket, all warm and content and safe in the softness.
I hope this chapter was nice, since it's an important one. I actually lost half of it because I forgot to save! It was such an awful feeling. All that work gone... Sigh. Anyway, I had to recover from the loss (really guys, I cried about it haha) and write it all again.
You know what's funny? In other work, I considered doing pairings but I clarified that I'd only do 'straight couples and nothing else'. Funny how scared and uncomrotable I was in the past about anything non-straight. And now a year later, here I am, dedicating an entire fic to a relationship (I'd never write exclusively romantic stuff in the past). Honestly, writing this makes me feel very calm. I understand now. It has nothing to do with gender. Love just happens. I'm glad I grew to accept others and myself too for it. I know this might be a bit too personal, but I really want to write this down since it's important to me to see it when I reread this story in the future. I hope you don't mind my personal thoughts.
Thank you for reading. I wish the remnants of spring or autumn are gentle to you these days. For me, it's spring. I'm watching the last late flowers bloom. I'll write for you once the one outside my window does too. It seems to be soon.