Alucard Discovers Pepsi

A Hellsing FanFic

Sapphirewyren

Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing

Author's Note: I've been busy preparing for going for my Master's Degree and writing several new series; one of them called "Diary of a Hellsing Butler", also been writing the first chapter of the next part of the Wings of Change series, thinking up questions for the "Interview with a Vampire" fic and writing a couple of WoC side ficlets. Also, been trying to decide if I should add some fanart for WoC and been doing some painting, so I have been very busy. But we're doing this, so this idea came from a guest whose name I'm guessing is "Glape" (not sure). Enjoy

Alucard was thirsty, but not for his usual blood packet and not water or tea. As he strolled towards the kitchen to see if Walter could suggest something for him, Alucard saw Seras sitting on the couch sipping a dark drink out of a plastic bottle. As he approached, he asked, "What is that you are drinking?"

"This is a soda called Pepsi. You want to try some?" Seras handed her master the bottle and what Alucard tasted was the most glorious, most delicious thing he had ever drunk. Seras took the bottle away from just as he was about to drink the whole thing, "Hey! Only a sip."

"But I want more, I must have more."

"I'll get you one from the kitchen."

Minutes later Alucard was enjoying the divine ambrosia known as Pepsi. How had he lived without this was a mystery to him. How come Integra never mentioned this to him? This was even better than blood. Soon Seras arose from the couch; "I'm going to the firing range" and she left. Alucard noticed that the draculina left her bottle behind and it still had some soda in it. He had drained his, so he picked up the unemptied bottle and drank that too. But he was not satisfied, he wanted more, he NEEDED more. "There must be more in the kitchen." But Alucard remembered that he was not allowed in the kitchen on pain of being sealed away. As Alucard was trying to figure out where soda would be kept, he saw a soldier walk by and remembered that Walter had set aside a room as storage for food and drink for the soldiers and he headed there at once. Getting past the lock was a cinch and soon the vampire king found himself in soda heaven. There were so many flavors to choose from; cherry, vanilla, diet, zero calories, and there was not only just Pepsi, there were Coca- Cola, Fanta, Root beer, cream soda, orange, grape, Sprite, ginger ale; and Alucard drank them all. By the time Alucard reached his room, he was stuffed from all the sugary drinks.

The thing about being a vampire though was that darn fast metabolism, besides the numerous trips to the loo, a couple of hours later and the soda craving came back. But now there was not a drop of soda left in the Hellsing Manor. While he was bemoaning the lack of soda in the room, Seras came into his room, "You drank the rest of my soda, didn't you?"

"Police Girl, where does Walter get the soda?"

"From the supermarket, of course. Why?"

"No reason."

Alucard ran out of the room. That rapid twitch that his left eye was doing made Seras realize that she probably shouldn't have told Alucard about the supermarket. A half-hour later, Walter walked into Integra's office with the cordless phone, "There is a Neville Duncan, manager of the Waitrose Supermarket on the line, he says has something that belongs to you, Sir."

Integra answered the phone; "I don't remember ordering anything."

"There is a man in red drinking all of our soda!"

"Get the car, Walter" sighed the commander.

When Integra and Walter reached the supermarket, there was Alucard, sprawled out in aisle 4, with empty soda bottles and cans around him. Neville said, "I tried to get him to leave, but he growled at me!" Then Alucard sat up and hiccupped, "Hey-hic-Integra- where you been? Hic- you missed the party-hic-sexy mama-hic!" The vampire king took an unopened bottle of grape soda off the lower shelf and proceeded to shake it while slurring, "I like-hic-it shaken- not stirred" then he opened the bottle, spraying Walter, a nervous Neville and a pissed off Integra in grape soda. "AAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLUUUUUCCCCCCAAAAAARRRRRRDDDDDD!"

End

I hope you enjoyed this sweet fanfic.