Alucard Discovers Bubble Wrap
A Hellsing Fanfic
Sapphirewyren
Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing
Author's note: Thanks to "A French Girl" for this idea. I will post "Interview with a Vampire once I get enough questions from reviewers/readers and when I myself have written some questions. Also, I get that Alucard is the main character, but please do not refer ALL or most questions to him, he's not the only one Enrico tends to do stupid things when he is bored, which is most likely to annoy Integra, which will lead to violence and we don't want that outside of fanfics. Ok, let's get started.
Pop. Pop. Pop.
"Alucard, stop that."
Pop. Pop. Pop.
"I said stop that!"
Pop. Pop. Pop
"What the hell is that?!"
"It's bubble wrap, my master."
"Go play with that somewhere else, I'm trying to read."
POP! POP! POP!
"GET OUT!"
Alucard ran out of the library before Integra decided it was a good idea to punch him in the mouth with silver knuckles. That night Integra went to bed early due to a headache with having to deal with Alucard and bloodied knuckles from having to punch one of the old farts at the Round Table for saying asinine things.
Pop. Pop. Pop.
"ALUCARD GET OUT OF MY ROOM!"
This was followed by a gunshot.
The next morning, Walter walked into the director's office, holding a sheet of paper; "Sir, you had better read this." The look on Walter's face said that something had happened. Integra took the paper and saw the headline: "WORLD'S LARGEST BUBBLE WRAP STOLEN"
"Why would I care about such foolishness?'
"Read where I highlighted"
Witnesses described the suspect as over 6'6, wearing a red coat, pants, and hat. Dark-colored boots and orange sunglasses. His complexion was pale and has black shoulder-length hair. Integra stared at the paper and then at Walter.
"He wouldn't…..would he?"
Suddenly there came a sound that sounded like a bomb went off and every window in the manor shattered. Integra looked out of the glassless windows and saw on the lawn the flattened remains of the record-breaking bubble wrap and Alucard in the middle of it, having jumped on it.
"AAAAAALLLLLLLUUUUUUUCCCCAAAAAARRRRRRRDDDDDDD!"
END
Author's Notes: Someone asked me how I came up with such funny stories, so I'll let you in on a secret: what I do is tell myself the story in my mind (all my good ideas usually come to me in the shower, scary ain't it?), if I'm laughing by the time I'm done telling myself the story, then we have a keeper. Sometimes I tell myself the story in different versions because if I don't react I know the readers won't. I do the same thing with my "Enrico" series as well, which reminds me, if you readers have ways that you want to see Enrico annoy Integra and her violent reactions let me know.