February 1921
Kurt

Kurt splashes water on his face, then reaches for his toothbrush. His mouth tastes as if a rhinoceros has pooped into it. After brushing his teeth, he turns on the shower to its hottest setting. Once the stall is steamy, he enters it and allows the water to cascade down his body. As he takes the longest shower ever, he recalls the previous night.

It all started out innocent enough. After he had finished flying at the airfield, he agreed to join the other lads for a bite to eat. They squeezed themselves into someone's Ford Model T car and were on their way to Harlem. When they entered Webster Hall, Kurt quickly realized two things - this wasn't an establishment where one goes to eat, and not all the women dancing on stage were women. Although they wore satin heels beneath delicate gowns and covered up parts of their bodies with feather fans, he could tell they were men by their body build and their Adam's apples. He'd never seen anything quite like it before.

He accepted a glass of moonshine to loosen up because he certainly had felt like a fish out of water in that place. After his second glass of moonshine, he joined in on the fun of hooting and clapping at the performers on stage. By the time he had his third drink - or was it fourth? - he could only remember snippets of the evening… tattoos, men in the crowd eyeing him, giggling his head off on the way home, and then… dear lord, getting sick all over Blaine.

Blaine.

Kurt jumps out of the shower and quickly dries himself off. He puts on his dressing gown and goes in search of Blaine. He returns to their bedroom, and notices that the sheets on Blaine's side of the bed are not creased, which probably means that he spent the night in the guest room. Why didn't he notice it when he woke up?

Boy, is he in big trouble.

He scurries down the corridor and takes a peek into the guest room. Although there are signs that Blaine had spent the night there - he never did master bed-making skills that would pass Kurt's father's inspection - Blaine is nowhere in sight.

Kurt goes downstairs to the kitchen where he notices that the table has been set for one. He spots the box of Post Grape-Nuts cereal, butter, and the jar of homemade orange marmalade on the table. There's a slip of paper on the plate, and he picks it up to read it.

My dearest Kurt,

I decided to let you sleep in this morning and have gone to teach your English class. There are aspirin on the kitchen counter next to the loaf of bread. I'll be back by dinner time.

Love,

Blaine

Kurt had completely forgotten that the Polish workers' wives were expecting him to teach English today; he's relieved that Blaine has taken his place because he's not in any condition to teach it. As he eats a bowl of cereal, he wonders what Blaine is going to say to him. He ponders also what he wants to say to Blaine. Kurt doesn't even know how to articulate what he's thinking without upsetting him.

Blaine is quite honestly the most wonderful person in the entire universe, but he wouldn't understand Kurt's side of things. Everything had been going splendidly for the first nine months since they found each other in New York City. Blaine was respectful of his feelings and allowed him to set the pace of their relationship. When Kurt had agreed to move in with Blaine, they went through a honeymoon period. They both eagerly accommodated the other as they settled into their new life together. And the sex, well, it was mind-blowing. Every nook and cranny of their townhouse was christened in the most delightful of ways.

But things changed dramatically in the new year. Suddenly, they no longer had their jobs at Healy's Tavern, and they were busy renovating a building, something that neither of them know anything about. It's still amazing to think that he's a co-owner and the manager of their very own dream restaurant; but - and there is always a but - they are together so much that Kurt finds it hard to breathe.

He wakes up with Blaine, he eats breakfast with Blaine, and they walk together to work, where he spends the entire day with Blaine. At 5 PM sharp, he spends two hours teaching English to the Polish workers. When he arrives home, Blaine has a hot meal ready, and they talk about the restaurant while eating. Kurt does the dishes while Blaine lights the fire in the living room. They collapse in their respective arm chair where Blaine reads a novel, and he flips through the latest fashion magazine, wondering when he'll find the time to sew again. When it's bedtime, they wash and brush their teeth together, change into their nightclothes, and slip into bed, falling asleep as soon as their heads hit the pillows.

It's exactly how he imagines his father's life is like with Mrs Hummel, and that's a scary thought for a 24-year-old man.

Kurt wants some fun in his life and wants to experience new things. You're only young once, and he doesn't want his life to slip away. The best thing he's done for himself this year is join the flying club. There was an immediate bond with the lads as they all were pilots during the Great War, too. They respect him, like him, and know nothing of his past. If only he didn't feel so guilty about having something for himself and not having to share it with Blaine.

He does have fun with Blaine, although those occasions have become far and few between now that they don't have jobs or money. If he's honest with himself, Blaine isn't the first person he thinks of when he wants to let his hair down and have fun. As wonderful as Blaine is, he's more traditional in what he enjoys doing in his leisure time.

Kurt decides to forgo the bread left out on the kitchen counter because he doesn't feel coordinated enough to deal with the toaster contraption that Blaine bought last November. Kurt pours a glass of water and swallows two aspirin. He has a dull headache, but his stomach is much more settled after eating the cereal. Although he'd love to climb back into bed and pretend last night never happened, he can't waste a precious free day that he has to himself.

After dressing into some casual clothes, Kurt goes up to the top floor and sits down at his table, where the weak winter sun lights up the space. He takes out papers from his satchel and sets them out on the table surface. The US Air Service has asked him to review the course material and exams for foreign pilots to receive their American license quickly rather than start from scratch. There have been so many advances in aeroplanes since the Great War. They are much more reliable, are capable of flying longer distances, and can carry heavier loads. There are already aeroplanes that carry passengers and the mail, and as air travel becomes more popular, companies will need more pilots quickly.

Kurt would be lying if he wasn't proud that the US Air Service sought his advice about the certification course. He knows that it's all thanks to Elliott, who always has great things to say about him. Kurt frowns, remembering that Elliott had told him that his four-year contract is up at the end of March, and he doesn't plan to renew it. Elliott isn't sure what he wants to do, but he knows for certain that he doesn't want to become a commercial pilot. Elliott hasn't decided whether to return to New Jersey and work at a factory or move to New York City and try his hand at something else.

Kurt works through the material, jotting down notes in the margins. He realizes that he could pass this exam in his sleep, but Kurt doesn't want to become a pilot for a living again. In spite of the troubles he's having in life at the moment, he really wants to manage Westerville's with Blaine by his side. They only have to get through these difficult months of renovating the building, and then life should find a new pace.

Kurt's thoughts are interrupted when he hears the front door open and Blaine shuffle around. Kurt sets down his pen and stands up.

It's time to face the music.

He returns the Air Service papers into his satchel and makes his way to the ground floor. His stomach rumbles when he smells fish and chips wafting from the bag in Blaine's hand. When Blaine gives him a weak smile, Kurt kisses him on the cheek. "Thanks for taking over my English class. I was in no condition to teach this morning."

Blaine shrugs. "That's all right. I brought in some food and taught them the English words to use in the shops." Blaine looks down at the bag in his hand. "I picked up some fish and chips to eat for dinner. Let's eat it before it goes cold."

They silently walk to the kitchen. While Blaine sets out the meal on plates, Kurt pours them water and collects the cutlery. Kurt eats so quickly that he practically inhales his food, just like Finn does. He had completely forgotten to eat lunch. When he looks up, he sees Blaine's head hung low, moving his food around the plate with a fork but not really eating.

"I'm sorry, Blaine. I was so zozzled last night. I've learnt my lesson the hard way. I'm never going to drink alcohol again for the rest of my life."

Blaine stands up and collects the plates. "That sounds rather drastic, but I suggest that you stay clear of the moonshine in the future. That stuff is potent and dangerous."

Kurt rubs his forehead. "Don't I know it."

Blaine sets down the plates on the kitchen counter. "I think we have more to talk about than you not being able to hold your moonshine."

Kurt follows Blaine to the living room, feeling like a naughty boy about to be lectured by his father. It fills him with dread.

Once they are seated on the sofa, Blaine starts the conversation. "You really hurt my feelings last night."

Kurt slumps and pinches the bridge of his nose. "The only thing I remember is that I threw up on your feet. I'm really sorry about that."

"Kurt, you were talking about Elliott's tattoo. I won't even ask how you managed to see it if it's on his upper back. Answer me honestly, did you let Elliott see your buttocks?"

Kurt now recalls the funny conversation at Websters Hall when everyone was talking about tattoos. "Of course he didn't see my buttocks! We were in the middle of a club with a bunch of guys talking about tattoos. You know what's really annoying? You always manage to turn things to be something about Elliott. You're like a green-eyed monster when it comes to him."

"Well, maybe I am. You like this guy."

"I like the way Elliott makes me feel. I mean, when was the last time that you complimented me or told me how special I was?"

"I moved to New York City to be with you. I-I changed my whole life! That doesn't make you feel loved?"

Kurt looks up at the ceiling. This conversation isn't going well at all. Blaine is rightfully snappy, and he doesn't want this to become a huge fight. He takes a deep breath and says, "Blaine, I do feel loved. I don't know… Things have been so stressful lately. We don't have jobs, and all our time is spent renovating the restaurant. Sometimes, I need to let off steam and go out to have some fun. And I feel guilty about it because you are sitting at home waiting for me."

"I'm doing more than sitting at home when you're out! Yesterday, I agreed to spend time with a fatherless lad on Saturdays. I wanted to tell you all about it, but it seems you forgot about having a special dinner together."

Kurt lowers his head. Yes, he had totally forgotten about agreeing to come home for dinner last night.

Kurt looks up when Blaine takes his hand. "After the English class, I walked around Central Park. I just needed some space so I could think." Blaine's eyes well up with tears. "There's no easy way to say this, but I think I should move out."

Kurt is shocked by these words. How did they get into this situation? "What! Blaine, that's not what I want."

"Me neither, but I think we need to take a step back for a second, together, and just look at the situation truthfully. It's not working out. If I'm honest with myself, I was the one pushing you to move into the townhouse with me. I'm not even sure if I gave you a real choice."

Kurt squeezes his hand. "Blaine, you've got to believe me, I wanted to move in with you. I was ready."

"I bought the building for our restaurant, and at the time, it seemed the most natural thing to do because we were planning to work together in a restaurant in the future. But looking back, we didn't have a conversation about it. We never weighed the pros and cons. We never really discussed if this was the absolute best thing for our relationship."

A tear falls down Kurt's face. "Are you breaking up with me?"

"Absolutely not. We are so together, but I think that by moving out, we can figure out our own boundaries and how we, as a couple, fit into the big picture. We need to sort this out before our lives become even busier with the opening of Westerville's."

"How would it work? We'll still see each other during the week at the restaurant. Wouldn't it be awkward to be around each other? And would we see each other after work? When would we fit it in?"

"Kurt, you are the master of schedules. If you change your English class on Sundays for a different day, that could leave us the day to spend together to do fun things," Blaine suggests.

Kurt understands what Blaine is saying. "Go to the movies, ice skate, visit museums… Like a date."

"Exactly. And when we're just being us having fun together, we'll remember why we are perfect for each other. We'll find a way to spend our lives together that makes us both happy. And most importantly, we'll fall in love all over again."

There is still one thing that bothers Kurt about this arrangement. "I should be the one moving out. You own the townhouse."

"I was going to tell you on Valentine's Day, but I'll let you in on a secret. The deed to the townhouse is in both our names. This is your home, too. I'm sure that Uncle Hiram will let me live with him again. It's much easier if I move out."

Kurt's breath hitches. Why would Blaine give him half the townhouse, which is worth a lot? "You don't need to waste your money on me."

"Kurt, I don't think it's a waste at all. We come from different backgrounds, and I was lucky enough to have a very rich cousin who set up a trust for me. I want you to feel as safe and secure as I do, whether we are together or apart."

Kurt throws himself into Blaine's arms, weeping. "Blaine, this is such a scary decision to make. I-I just, I feel like I-I... "

Blaine rubs his back. "It is scary, but I think it's a little less scary if we make the decision together. Kurt, I will always love you. I will always want to live our lives together. But I also want to protect something that is very precious to me. If at any time, you don't think that living apart is accomplishing anything, we can always talk about it and figure out what could be better for us."

Blaine rises from the sofa and wipes his hands on his trousers. "I best pack some things for the next few days."

When Blaine goes upstairs, Kurt remains frozen on the sofa. He realizes that Blaine is right in a way. Maybe they need some space in order to figure out how they will juggle owning a restaurant and a townhouse, and still have enough leftover energy to focus on their relationship, too.

Blaine returns to the ground floor with a stuffed duffle bag. "If I forgot anything, I'll let you know at work tomorrow."

Kurt stands up. "Will we have occasional sleepovers?"

Blaine shakes his head. "Do you really want to know why you hurt my feelings last night?"

Kurt drops his head in shame. "It's because I missed our special dinner, got zozzled, returned home late at night, and threw up on your feet."

"No, Kurt. It's because when you came home after talking about butty butt butts with the lads, you wanted sex with me. The next time I'm in our bed, I don't want to be in any doubt that it's me whom you want."

Blaine quickly turns around and storms out the front door, leaving Kurt devastated.

Author's notes

Many thanks to my fantastic betas - Fearlessly, Lilyvandersteen, Dblmalfunction. I made the last-minute edits and performed the final proofreading by myself, so all mistakes are mine.

I'm HKVoyage on Tumblr.

Next up: Blaine and Kurt have their first date the following Sunday.