75. Inheritance
"So," Hermione muttered thoughtfully as I was writing my Potions essay. We were sitting at the Gryffindor table and doing our homework. Ron and Harry had left for Quidditch practice.
"So what," I sighed and pulled the book about Healing Potions closer.
She placed her quill down and turned to me, but I kept my eyes on the list of ingredients. "I was wondering if you would come to Hogsmeade tomorrow. Not to… do anything but to be there and see what's happening. Harry agreed to come, and it would be great if you'd be there as well. As our friend," she added the last part quietly.
I did not answer at once. Instead I pretended to be perusing the brewing instructions of the Lung Clearing Potion. Apparently, Hermione had told a couple of people about the idea of a study group for Defence against the Dark Arts and planned to meet in a pub in Hogsmeade the following day. I had given the matter a great deal of thought. Sometimes it seemed an insane idea to involve myself, but then, I had found myself thinking about practicing useful wand spells.
"Well," I said slowly and paused in my writing, "I suppose I could show up and hide somewhere in a corner." Although I was not looking at her, I felt Hermione's beaming expression and excitement. A small smile tugged at the corner of my lips and warmth settled in the pit of my stomach.
"Brilliant. So, will you accompany us to Hogsmeade?"
"Yes," I muttered as I turned my attention back to my essay. The scratching of the quill filled the following silence until Hermione leaned closer to me.
"What are you writing there anyway? I thought you already finished your Potions essay," she frowned at my work. "This isn't even our Potions book…"
"Explaining how the Lung Clearing Potion works," I said absentminded and turned a few pages back to check the brewing instructions.
"Lung Clearing Potion," Hermione asked confused. "Why would you need to study that one? And for whom are you writing this essay if not for class?"
With a satisfied smile I wrote the last sentences of my conclusion and lay down the quill. Excitement rushed through my veins and left my skin tingling. This was the first time that I had been assigned an essay instead of only reading books. "It's for Professor Snape. An extra assignment about Healing Magic."
Hermione's eyes widened incredulously, and I chuckled at her enthusiastic expression. Only studying could evoke this reaction from her. She snatched the book I had borrowed from the library and stared at the cover. "You got Professor Snape to give you an extra assignment? I've never heard that he is giving extra assignments. I mean, I asked him once and he simply brushed me off, saying that he had enough work to do with the regular homework."
I smirked to myself and rolled up the four pieces of parchment. "Well, I'm not writing this essay to get a better grade. I asked him if he could recommend books about Healing Potions since I am interested in the subject. He gave me a list with three books to read and assigned me this essay when I was through with them." I packed my few belongings into my bag and took the thick roll of parchment. Then I cast the baffled Hermione a smile. "Actually, I'm leaving to hand it in now. Wouldn't want to annoy our Potions Professor too late a Friday afternoon."
The memory about Severus' and my intense coming together flashed through my mind and my heart suddenly flattered in my chest. A voice in the back of my mind – that sounded surprisingly like Draco, teased me that Severus would surely not mind at all if I came by later in the afternoon. My cheeks felt warm and I chastised Draco's voice. How unelvish-like and improper to think this way.
"Do you mind if I'm coming with you," Hermione asked excited but had already stuffed all her things into the bag. Brown eyes were casting me a questioning look. I chuckled and shook my head. The smirk stayed plastered on my face when I replied to Draco's voice. Under no circumstances would there be any kind of improper behaviour with Hermione trailing behind me.
"Hermione," I asked as we were descending the stairs into the Dungeons. She hummed and I continued slightly more nervous now. I cast her a short look, but her focus was on the stairs. "I'm sorry for snapping at you the other day. You know, when we returned from the Black Lake."
A surprised yet happy expression settled on her features and she smiled softly. "Oh, don't worry about it. I suppose, I was a bit too harsh as well… Although, I truly can't see what you could possibly see in them."
I rolled my eyes but chuckled, nonetheless. "Well, you don't know them. If you would try to see past the supercilious attitude, you would understand that their condescending jokes are actually nothing more than harmless banter."
"Since when are insults harmless banter," Hermione grumbled and frowned as we passed a few Slytherins.
"I'm not talking about insults but since you are mentioning it," I explained patiently even though my insides were itching with happiness. This was the first time that she – or anybody, was truly willing to listen to my opinion. "Do you remember when I told you that I can sense lies? Well, to be honest, from all the conversations I've had so far, the ones with Slytherins turned out to be the most honest. They don't necessarily speak their minds, but they are not afraid to say their opinion. Yes, their insults are indubitably disrespectful and a waste of time, but I must admit that I prefer genuine insults to meaningless courtesy. Somebody who insults me is honest whereas most people use phrases of courtesy without actually meaning them. And I sense them as lies."
"Right, you prefer honesty. But doesn't it bother you if their insults hurt others? Because I do recall several times when I just wanted to hex Malfoy and nothing you say could've changed that," Hermione said agitated.
I sighed wearily. "Of course, it does. They are idiots sometimes. Idiots who are trying not to attract attention with un-Slytherin like behaviour. They need to protect themselves since they don't have the support you, Harry or especially Ron has. Most Slytherins have been taught that showing emotions is a weakness. To keep others from getting too close to them, they make sure to keep them at a distance. Is that so hard to understand? In my opinion, it's logic. They don't know any other way since they have been raised with certain beliefs. And if they see how easily others can be riled up, they certainly won't show themselves as vulnerable."
Hermione remained quiet but since we had reached Severus' classroom, I chose not to say anything else. I knocked firmly on the door and it opened by itself seconds later. Hermione hesitated to enter but finally closed the door behind her. Nervously, she stood in the middle of the classroom and looked like a house-elf waiting to be punished.
"Ms. Jackson, to what do I owe this displeasure," Severus drawled sarcastically as he stood from behind his desk and approached us. His hard gaze flickered to an anxious Hermione and his lips twitched with amusement. Hermione must have taken his slight change of expression for impatience or annoyance since she quickly straightened her back and clutched the bag tighter to her chest. It took all the self-control I possessed not to chuckle as Severus seemed to savour her rapidly growing insecurity under his unwavering stare.
"I finished the essay about the Lung Clearing Potion, sir," I decided to save Hermione by drawing his attention back to me. Severus' features remained impassive except for one black eyebrow that cocked arrogantly. I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from smiling when he snatched the role of parchments out of my hand. Under his hawk-like gaze, he unrolled it and scanned the essay.
"Have you read a published essay or article about the development of a potion before," Severus frowned at my text as black eyes moved rapidly over the pages.
"No, I haven't," I answered confused and stared at him. I knew, he would probably explain his question sooner or later, so I waited patiently. The silence stretched and I could not help my wandering thoughts. The way his hair framed his concentrated features made him look younger. Without the usual dark scowl or wrinkles of annoyance he looked so innocent and vulnerable. There it was again – the burning pull in my chest, seducing me to close the gap with a few steps.
"Well," he raised his head and passionate eyes were burning in mine, "what made you structure this essay differently than your homework?"
A cold shiver ran down my spine, ripping me out of my daydreaming. His intense black eyes were incredibly distracting, and I swallowed the thick lump in my throat. An insecure "I don't know", that sounded more like a question, escaped my lips without my consent.
"If you expect me to spare time reading this, I will need a more qualified answer, Jackson," Severus sneered and smirked when I cast him a dark look. Annoying daydreams, coming when it was the least appropriate.
"I deemed it to make more sense," I explained when my mind had jumped back to work. "The thesis referred to the different effects of the potion evoked through minimal changes in the measure of certain ingredients. So, to start with a research report about the ingredients before presenting the essay seemed more logical instead of overloading the arguments with analytical facts. That makes it much easier to read, in my opinion."
Severus stared at me with an unnerving expression. His eyes were burning into my soul, yet he looked as if he was contemplating something. After a long silence – during which I had refused to be intimidated again, his lips twitched, and he lowered his hands.
"Henceforth, I expect the same quality and effort in your Potions essays. The essay will be the length I'm giving the entire class but in addition I want a detailed research report about the primary ingredients of the concerned Potions. If you have already presented an ingredient in a previous paper, you will either go further into detail or chose a secondary ingredient."
I smiled widely as pride left my heart fluttering. Severus cast me a stern look and raised the hand that was still holding my essay. "I won't grade this one, but your homework will be graded differently from now on. If you should find yourself struggling with the additional work, you will tell me. If I don't hear complaints or that your grades are falling, I will resume with correcting your papers with a higher scale. Is that clear?"
"Yes, of course," I beamed and felt my legs turning wobbly. I wanted to embrace him so badly. "Thank you."
Severus cocked an arrogant eyebrow and sneered down at me. "We will see in a week if you still feel like thanking me. Now, run along and take your stray friend with you." Hermione shifted and huffed to herself. I felt so happy that I could not even show him a glimpse of a warning. Without another word, Severus turned around and stepped to his desk.
"Professor," I asked when a question came to my mind. Severus turned to me with a questioning eyebrow. "Why did you ask if I read published potions articles?"
"The same structure can be found in academical writing or published research papers, as such in the field of Potion Studies."
I nodded, then frowned nervously. "And could you recommend new books about Healing Magic or Potions? Since I finished the others already."
Severus nodded curtly before turning to his desk. He scribbled something on a piece of parchment before returning to us. He hesitated thoughtfully and handed me the parchment. My heart leapt with joy when I saw four new book titles. "Thank you."
"Don't make me regret this decision, Jackson," Severus said dramatically.
"I won't sir," I said with an overenthusiastic smile. He rolled his eyes and cast me a scowl.
"Out," Severus growled and the door opened with a flick of his wand. Without another glance he whirled around to his desk and I found it hard not to smile at his retreating back. My stomach was tingling again and a sigh escaped my lips. Why had I agreed for Hermione to come?
"Sir," spoke up Hermione as we had almost reached the door. Surprised and curious, I looked from her to an obviously annoyed Severus. I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from smiling but with no success. Luckily, I was standing behind her.
"What now, Granger," Severus drawled and cast her a dark look. I folded my arms and pressed the back of my hand against my lips to prevent myself from smirking.
"Well, I was wondering if…," she started nervously and glanced cautiously at him. Severus curled his lips but by the mischievous gleam in his eyes I knew that he was enjoying her anxiety. And for some reason I found it amusing to watch their reactions to each other.
"Spit it out, girl," Severus snapped impatiently, and black eyes pierced her relentlessly.
"I wanted to know, if it were possible for me to have an extra assignment as well? I would be interested in studying more, especially with the exams coming up. And I think it would be quite interesting to learn more about Potions," Hermione's voice rushed out of her mouth. Her eyes widened and her entire body tensed as if she expected Severus to curse. Curiously, I raised my eyebrows and smirked behind my hand. She was brave enough to ask him such a question, but not to keep eye-contact with him. I found that highly contradictory, yet also amusing.
A black eyebrow cocked to his hair. Severus stared at her with a blank expression. "No."
Hermione frowned and wrinkles of frustration appeared on her forehead. "But sir, I asked you in third year and you refused and now Arya is allowed to-"
"As you have certainly noticed by now, I don't like know-it-alls, Granger," Severus sneered darkly and stepped closer. I rolled my eyes as he completed the intimidating teacher pose by folding his arms. "If you want to quench your thirst for knowledge, go to the library but do not mistake me for a talking book."
"But I'm not-"
"I will not spare my precious time to improve your self-esteem, Granger. I have more than enough work to fill my days," Severus cut her off harshly. Genuine irritation had replaced the previous amusement. My smirk had been wiped off my face with his severe expression. We both had the true reason in mind why he was willing to teach me.
I cleared my throat when I saw fierce determination settle on Hermione's face. I closed my eyes to brace myself for what would end in a disaster if she continued. Some people clearly had difficulties to accept a refusal.
"But I'm your student, sir. Teachers are supposed to support their students in their education. It's not fair that you're teaching Arya but no one else," argued Hermione angrily. The temperature in the room sunk the same second. If it had not been for Severus' terrifying, hard expression, I would have found her childish ranting amusing. Instead, a cold shiver ran down my spine.
Severus unfolded his arms and crossed the distance between them with two long strides. I felt annoyance radiating from his body as black eyes glared daggers at her. "Yes, Ms. Granger, I'm your teacher and as such I warn you about questioning my decisions. It may come as a surprise, but grades clearly aren't everything. Life is neither kind nor fair, therefore, I recommend you drop this arrogant, naïve attitude if you truly wish to work with me."
Hermione scowled and clenched her jaw. Severus' glare flickered to me before boring into Hermione's averted face. I sighed tiredly and played with my fingers. I knew he was angry because Hermione had returned the thoughts of my curse to the forefront of his mind. And I could not chastise him since I would have reacted the same. The thing that left my insides clenching was the knowledge that I would certainly never live to tell my friends and everyone else the entire truth.
"Get out," Severus spat before rushing back to his desk. I did not miss his hands that were clenched to tight fists. My heart ached when I had no other choice but to follow my friend out of his classroom. The feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach was growing and causing an uncomfortable pressure. I wanted to turn around and be in his safe embrace, but the closing door wiped the thought from my mind.
The following day passed fairly quickly as we spend most of the time in Hogsmeade. When Hermione pulled me along into the Hog's Head, a dodgy bar which was almost empty, I chose to stand in the darkest part of the room. Anxiously, I listened and watched the scenery as it unfolded. My thoughts whirled between regret of coming in the first place and curiosity as the students continued pestering Harry about my father's return. To my surprise most of them believed in his return. Soothing relief was slowly settling in my body and easing my mind a little. Before parting, we had all signed for 'Dumbledore's Army' – the secret Defence Against the Dark Arts group. Perhaps, this had not been such a bad idea after all.
It was on Sunday afternoon that I chose to go to the Dungeons, but not to visit Severus. In the morning, I had worked on my Transfigurations essay. The last lesson had come to my mind and since then I had constantly been thinking about my mother. I had wondered if my mother had been capable to conjure and vanish living beings without hesitation. She was a fairy so naturally she would have perceived animals' feelings as well. It was only when Harry had appeared in a much lighter mood that my thoughts had drifted to my mother's chest. It was still waiting for me in the Dungeons. So, after lunch, I had excused myself from my friends, telling them that I wanted to spend some time alone. Whilst Harry had looked at me with a quiet understanding, Hermione had frowned upon my vague excuse and obviously concluded that I was meeting my brother.
Why were they all so quick with concluding things they hardly knew anything about?
I closed my eyes as the powerful magic of the wards on my training room rushed through my body. The lock clicked softly as I closed the door behind me. The torches on the wall sprang to life and flames started dancing in the fireplace. My gaze flickered to the wooden chest. Subtle, elegant ornaments were engraved in the wood. The hinges were shining white and formed to beautiful flowers. A warm shiver rolled down my back at the sight of the star-shaped flower on the chest's lid. My heart hammered against my ribcage as I kneeled in front of it. My hands were shaking when I attempted to open the chest. There was no keyhole, yet I could not lift the lid.
I frowned and let my fingers run over the front side. No keyhole. A thought came to my mind and I concentrated on the tingling feeling of magic in the palm of my hands. A blinding white light struck my body like a lightning bolt and I groaned as the pain lit every nerve in my body. I scowled at the innocent, still closed, chest and massaged my temples. My blurred eyesight took some time to sharpen. Then I froze and squinted my eyes.
The centre of the star-shaped flower on the lid formed a circle, thin-lined deepening with an odd form. The deepening was irregular. I had seen it before. My gaze flickered to the silver ring on my right ring finger. Several pieces formed like ranks of Devil's snare joined to form a ring. When I took it off I suddenly felt incomplete. Since my first year, I was wearing this ring every single day. Hesitantly, I placed it into the deepening on the lid and turned it until the ranks snapped into the right place.
Warmth flooded my body when I leaned back and watched the chest with an excited smile on my lips. The ring light up shortly before a faint click was audible in the chest. The light vanished. Absentminded, I put the ring back on my finger before lifting the lid.
I could not prevent the frown of confusion when my gaze fell on the miniature objects organized neatly in rectangular bowls. The elegant vial with a swirling white content caught my attention. I swallowed the thick lump in my throat as I stared at the cloud of memories. They could only be my mother's. What would I see if I watched them? Severus had said that the content of this chest would involve me in this war. Of course, I was already in the middle of it, but a feeling of dread filled the pit of my stomach when I realized that watching these memories would take the possibility to turn around. But was that what I wanted?
I gritted my teeth and took a deep breath. No, I wanted to fight. I shook my head to clear my mind. I wanted to know more about who I was. This was my chance to learn about my folk and my mother. I was a fairy. I uncorked the vial and the sparkling white cloud soared slowly in direction of my head…
I found myself standing in a wide glade. My breath hitched in my throat when I noticed a tall woman staring thoughtfully into the forest. The twittering of birds reached my ears. It was a peaceful place. My attention was attracted by the woman. Her long, green dress – too flawless and elegant to have been made by human hands, was hugging her slender form. My insides were trembling with excitement as my legs brought me closer. The woman's hair had the same hazelnut colour as mine. Pointed ears peaked through long strains.
I inhaled sharply when the woman finally turned her head in my direction. Several impressions bombarded me at once. This woman had my hair and the same bright, blue eyes. Everything about her was undoubtedly flawless and graceful – the way she moved, her confident posture, the striking beauty. Although this was only a memory, the woman radiated an authority and kindness that made me stare at her in awe. As her lips stretched into a sad smile I felt as if all my doubts and fear vanished, leaving a calm feeling of inner peace.
"Ever the sun traces its path from horizon to horizon, and ever the moon follows, and ever the days roll past without care for the lives they grind away, one by one. Try though they might, no being escapes death forever, not even the elbs or the spirits. To all, there is an end. If you are watching me, Arya, then my end has come and I am dead."
Warmth flooded my body as her clear, bell-like voice hummed through my entire body. The elvish woman folded her arms behind her back and turned her body in my direction. An elegant sheath was attached to the belt around her waist. She was not looking at me but I knew that this memory was a message for me alone.
"My beloved daughter," happiness flickered over the woman's face and my body froze in shock of the obvious truth. "My beautiful Arya, I wish that you and I could have this talk face to face. If you see this, Arya, I hope that you are safe and happy, and that Tom is dead. However, I realize how unlikely my most wishful thought is. It's a pleasure like no other for me to watch you grow up, but also a torture like no other because I force you to live your life surrounded by darkness."
A severe expression settled on my mother's features. Tears welled up in my eyes and rolled down my cheeks. For the first time in my life I felt understood although this was a mere memory.
"There is much you don't know about who you are, my daughter. To survive this war, you must learn about yourself. There isn't much time to teach you through my memories. You must have many questions therefore I hope to answer them."
"In the pursuit of brevity, I shall assume that Severus has already told you how we met. I feel a cold creeping into my limbs the likes of which has never troubled me before. Dark Magic is surrounding me every day and I wish I could protect you from it. I know it's now your turn to fight. There is much I still hope to accomplish, but none of it is for myself, only for you, and you shall eclipse everything I have done. Of that, I am sure."
"Your name, your true name, is Arya Evandar. Arya is a rare name in the human world, so I presented you as Aryanna. My true elbish name is Leya Evandar. I chose the most common human family name when I came to this world – making me Leyanne Jackson," her lips twitched with disgust. "Admittedly, it's an insult to who we truly are, but it's necessary for our, but especially your protection. Always remember who you are, Arya. You are my daughter – Arya Evandar from house Thranduin."
"We belong to the so-called Ancient folk – the elbs. There exist tales about our folk in the wizarding world although we are falsely referred to as fairies or elves. But elves are the poor creatures that humans have made their servants by taking advantage of their kindness and loyalty and fairies are wild, magical creatures. Witches and wizards have changed our existence to a mere story for children, but one day they will wake up from their ignorance and must face the truth."
I wiped the tears from my eyes and watched as my mother gazed at the sky. "I have my share of regrets, but you are not one of them, Arya. I am proud to have you as my daughter, prouder than you will ever know. I never wished that future upon you but seeing you every day is my greatest gift."
A reassuring smile graced my mother's lips as she turned in my direction with unguarded affection. "I had a vision about the future the day of your birth. It eased my guilt of ignoring my closest friend's advice and falling into Tom's trap… Listen to your heart, Arya, for it will show you the way to the happiness I saw in your close future. Don't despair if you believe nobody understands you. Humans tend to categorize more than other thinking beings. They fear what they cannot understand. They distinguish children from adults by age although age is but a number, not a state of mind or a reason for any type of behaviour."
My mother grasped the hilt, the veins prominent on the back of her hand. "You possess great abilities that most human minds cannot understand, Arya. Greatness inspires fear and envy, envy engenders spite and spite spawns lies… Your magic is stronger for you control Ancient magic. Your body is adapted to the lifespan of Elbs in strength, speed, and agility. We are naturally adapted for fighting since we must protect the purity of magic. I will teach you to understand who you truly are and to use your abilities to protect yourself and those you love."
Although my mother was not looking at me, her gaze felt as if she was staring straight into my soul. My throat tightened as I fought the urge to tell her that I was there. I wanted her to see me. I wanted to see her and not just in her memory.
"Whatever you do, protect those you care for, Arya, for without them, life is more miserable than you can imagine. You must realize that Tom Riddle is your greatest and most dangerous enemy. Until he is dead, neither you nor Severus will ever find peace. My greatest desire, Arya, is that you and Severus will live long and fruitful lives, free from fear of Tom and his followers. I wish that I could protect you from all of the dangers that threaten you, but that is not within my ability. All I can do is give you my advice and teach you while I am still here…"
An expression of peace settled on my mother's features and she smiled. „Whatever happens, know that I love you. May good fortune rule over you and peace live in your heart. May the stars watch over you, Arya Evandar."
Coldness enwrapped my racing heart when an invisible force tore me away from the glade. I found myself kneeling on the stone floor. My eyes focused on the wooden chest, but my thoughts were far away from the Dungeons. My life seemed to have changed in the short time I had watched the memory. With shaking hands, I corked the vial when the swirling white cloud of memories had returned into it. For a long moment, I stared at the vessel, lost in my whirling thoughts.
My name was Arya Evandar. I was sure that my mind had intuitively known or why else would I have asked to be called Arya instead of Aryanna. And the name Jackson had been supposed to link me to the human world. But I was a fair- an elb. I was an elb, not a fairy nor an elf. I was Arya Evandar from house Thranduin.
"I am Arya Evandar," I whispered to myself and a cold shiver ran down my spine. "I am Arya Evandar from house Thranduin."
Warmth flooded my entire body and every nerve in my body felt like burning. I smiled at the vial as more tears dropped on my shaking hands. My magic was rushing vividly through my veins and making my skin tingle. A soft chuckle left my lips before it turned into a relieved laugh. The flames in the fireplace roared louder. The torches on the walls shone brighter as the truth of my origin settled in the core of my soul, connecting with the entire power of my magic. I felt the shift in my magic. Suddenly, it was everywhere and burning stronger than I had ever felt before. It felt right.
"I am Arya Evandar," I laughed with tears in my eyes. I felt like exploding with happiness. Jumping to my feet, I shouted into the empty room. "I am Arya Evandar from house Thranduin. I'm an elb. I'm Arya Evandar."
Grinning, I closed my eyes and dwelled in the knowledge of finally genuinely feeling who I was. So many doubts and questions had vanished with the few, but essential information my mother had given. I finally felt it in every bone of my body, my magic, and soul. I knew who I was.
I glanced at the vial in my hand, then at the open chest. It was the first time in my life that I made a decision without questioning whether it was a wise thing to do or not. I put the vial back in its place and closed the lid. I would inspect the content of the chest another day. I was beaming inwardly as I rushed through the Dungeons with bouncing steps. I wanted to run through the corridors, laugh and shout with happiness.
The door to Severus' office opened like a gunfire as my joyful burst of magic banged it against the wall. I skipped inside and by the time the door locked behind me I had already crossed half of his office.
"What the hell do you think you're doing," an irritated Severus appeared in the door that lead to his private quarters.
My smile widened and my heart was burning with overwhelming emotions. I rushed to him and threw my arms around his neck. Laughter bubbled in my chest and new tears ran down my cheeks as I buried my face in the crook of his neck. The scent of fresh herbs filled my nose, provoking an entirely new haywire of sensations in the pit of my stomach. Hesitantly, strong arms came up and wrapped around my back.
"What happened, Arya," Severus asked slowly, the confusion evident in his voice. I chuckled and pulled back. The expression on Severus' face morphed to one of utter confusion and helplessness as more tears rolled down my cheeks.
"I am Arya Evandar," I beamed and gripped his upper arms.
Severus frowned. "I beg your pardon?"
"I am Arya Evandar. Arya Evandar. My name is Arya Evandar," I said laughing.
"If I wouldn't know any better, I would think you've been drugged," Severus muttered, and his inquiring gaze wandered over my face.
"No, no, Severus," I chuckled and wrapped my arms around his neck. "I am Arya Evandar, not Aryanna Jackson. I'm Arya Evandar from house Thranduin. I'm an elb, not an elf or a fairy, just an elb. My mother told me. She told me, Severus. I saw her memory – I saw her. I am Arya Evandar, the daughter of Leya Evandar."
Realization flickered over Severus' face and his body relaxed against mine. "Arya… Evandar?"
My smile widened as I nodded excitedly. "Yes. And I can feel it, Severus. For the first time I can truly feel who I am. My magic – I felt when the knowledge settled in my soul. I still feel the burst of magic burning in me. It feels as if I finally belong somewhere or that I know where I belong now. I know where I belong because I know who I truly am. I am Arya Evandar."
Severus stared at me with an unreadable expression that sent goosebumps down my spine. My heart was racing with excitement as I looked into the black eyes of the man who was holding my heart. Then his lips twitched into a smile and he cupped my cheek with his warm hand. "Arya Evandar… sounds more elvish than Aryanna Jackson."
"Elbish," I chuckled softly and tightened my hold on him, "it's elbish. I'm not an elf."
Severus let his fingers graze gently over my cheek, an amused sparkle in his eyes. "My apologies, elb."
My heart made any coherent thought impossible as the powerful love for him raised my head. The moment our lips touched the world vanished around us. My eyes fell close, and all I could feel was Severus. His warmth, his touch, his being. The usually distant man lost himself to my touch and turned into a passionate lover. It was a feeling of trust, something so pure, so innocent. It brought emotions up inside me that I did not have a name for. My heart skipped a beat when his hands cupped my cheeks and pulled me even closer, taking in this embrace, this kiss of joy and love. My whole body craved more, craved him, wanted to feel him closer.
"Severus," I whispered shakily when he pulled back to look into my eyes. The intensity of the unguarded feelings in these black eyes made me shiver in his arms. His lips hovered over mine as he stared at me. His hold on me tightened, the hand in my hair keeping me pressed against him, yet it felt not close enough.
"I love you, Arya Evandar from house Thranduin," Severus whispered huskily.
"I belong with you, Severus. I love you. I always did but now I know who I truly am. I belong with you as Arya Evandar."
Before I could say anything else Severus' lips crashed against mine with unbridled passion. A low groan rumbled in his chest and if it had not been for his safe hold, my knees would have struggled to keep my melting body standing. I was intoxicated – he was intoxicating me, but it did not matter. Nothing mattered except Severus' lips setting my blood on fire. His hands, that kept me possessively close to his body and evoked so many emotions that I could hardly catch my breath. My hands were clutching his collar and hair, my fingers scratching his scalp. My heart was aching for more, much more. I knew who I was, where I belonged. Now I wanted to belong to the man who had my unconditional trust and love. But my mind reminded myself of whom I had fallen in love with. Severus was a protective man who would not risk getting me in trouble.
Maybe time stopped when Severus' lips silenced every thought, but the flutter in my body only intensified. My heart pounded in my chest as my knees turned weaker. I could only focus on how soft he felt against me, how addictively he invaded all my senses. Every breath I took smelled like fresh herbs and forced my heart to skip a beat. Soft noises of pleasure escaped my lips, out of my control, but I hardly noticed them. There was raw emotion in the way Severus' fingers curled in my hair.
Slowly, Severus raised his face and brushed his nose tenderly against my cheek. Heavy breaths were rolling down my face and left my stomach tingling. For a moment I had to concentrate on my breathing to fill my tight lungs with fresh air. Severus' intense stare made my heart pound faster against his firm chest.
"I have never seen someone as beautiful in my entire life," I said with a soft longing in my voice. "So strong and… good. The way she was speaking and standing there," I smiled sadly, "I felt understood without saying anything."
Absentminded, I stared at the collar of his coat. Severus' slow breath rolling down my face comforted me. Gently, his thumbs wiped my tears away. "She was indeed a remarkable woman."
The fluttering sensation in my stomach brought me to look into his eyes. For a moment I was contemplating whether I should tell Severus the truth about how my mother came to be with my father. The secret about him having cursed her as well was nagging at the back of my mind. Pushing the feeling of guilt aside, I chose not to ruin the moment.
"She said that she had had a vision about me," I smiled softly as her words replayed in my mind. Severus tilted his head and watched me curiously. "I think she saw us together. Her words weren't clear, but she was speaking about you as well… She wanted to protect us." I frowned slightly and closed my mouth as a thought itched in the back of my mind.
"What is it," Severus asked.
"I don't know," I muttered and shook my head. "Something she said caught my attention… She advised not to despair if I felt misunderstood. That humans categorized more than others… The day I showed you Draco's note you told me I was an adult soul in a younger body."
Severus nodded with thoughtfully furrowed eyebrows. My lips twitched and I beamed as realization dawned me. "She told me that most humans distinguished children from adults by age although age was but a number, not a state of mind or a reason for any type of behaviour."
"You told me the same thing," Severus said softly and raised a questioning eyebrow. "I fail to see the importance though."
"Importance," I chuckled and shook my head at my own thoughtlessness. "The importance is that it was her way of expressing her support for our relationship. I'm sure she implanted this knowledge into my mind to make sure I would follow my heart instead of human conventions."
Severus snorted and cast me a doubtful look. "I highly doubt that. But even if she had done so, I dare to believe it was for an entirely different reason."
"And what reason would that be," I asked confused.
Severus smirked. "Me."
"You?"
Severus curled his lips and drawled. "You aren't the first one to call me stubborn or even petulant."
I was at a loss for words as Severus sneered at me with a condescending expression. Then I shook my head and smiled widely. "Right, that you are. Then there is no doubt that it was her way of subtly hinting her support."
"Anything else I need to know about you, elb," Severus smirked.
I tilted my head and stared at his amused expression. "I will write you a list."
Severus chuckled and brought his hand up to caress my cheek with the back of his fingers. The tender touch made my skin tingle. "I never told you that your mother lacked a sense of humour."
I frowned at him. "I find that hard to believe."
"Well, she wasn't as flawless as she looked," Severus stated softly.
"I know, I know. I mean you taught me everything I needed to know about human behaviour. Humour isn't particularly elbish, but I thought that she learned from you."
"You grew up here, Arya, she didn't. You learned to find a connection with those around you and how to overlook people's behaviour, but she struggled to understand their reasons. You aren't any less an elb for having been born in the human world."
I swallowed the forming lump in my throat. "Really?"
"Yes, I have a reason for calling you elb," Severus grunted impatiently and rolled his eyes. "You can be frustratingly thick sometimes, Ms. Evandar."
My heart fluttered in my chest and I smiled. I buried my face in the crook of his neck and closed my eyes. Radiant happiness flared in my heart and overwhelmed my nerves once more. Severus placed the gentlest of kisses to my temple, the loving gesture laying his heart bare in a way that words never could.
"Thank you," I muttered and took a deep breath of Severus' comforting scent. "If my mother had no sense of humour, would she have taken your words as an insult?"
"Oh yes," Severus chuckled darkly, "which is why I'm infinitely grateful that you developed an understanding of humour."
A chuckle escaped my lips and I felt Severus tense in my arms as my breath caressed his warm skin. "I can imagine how difficult it would be if I hadn't."
"You are and will always be an elb, Arya Evandar," Severus said softly and smirked against my temple. "In fact, my elb."
My smile widened as I hummed happily into his frockcoat. "You are a wonderful man, Severus."
Severus snorted. "That is most certainly not an adequate attribute to characterize me."
"You understand and read me better like one else, you are honest and blunt, hold true to your word, smarter than anyone else I know, invitingly eloquent, strong-minded-"
"Is there a particular reason for your rant," Severus growled annoyed.
"Honesty, loyalty, respect… You value the same traits as I do – as elbs do, but when people don't take them as seriously, you become grumpy. You understand me because we share the same values. You seek to understand and don't judge me unlike everyone else. So, what does that make you if not wonderful?"
"Less stupid than others," suggested Severus drily.
I sighed and lifted my head, a smile pulling at the corner of my lips. "You are wonderful, Slytherin."
Black eyes scowled without spite when Severus took a deep breath. "If you say so, stubborn woman."
I beamed at him and rested my forehead against his. "I love you, stubborn man."
Severus cupped my face with his hands and placed a kiss on my lips. I felt his lips stretching into a heart-fluttering smile but before he could say anything a firm knock on the door ripped us apart. The comfortable warmth in my heart was replaced with burning frustration. The mask of cold indifference settled on Severus' features in less than a second and he stepped away. The door opened and I saw my Head of house, followed by Professor Flitwick. With a bemused expression his eyes flickered from his younger colleague to me.
"I expect your essay next week, Ms. Jackson," Severus' cold voice drew my attention. "Do you have any more questions?"
"No sir," I smiled and straightened my back. "Thank you."
Severus nodded curtly and folded his arms across his chest. Black eyes pierced my back when I turned to leave. Leaps of joy hammered in my chest and a comfortable humming sounded in the core of my magic. I felt good, better than I ever had in my life.
"Jackson," Severus' sharp voice halted me in my steps, "five points from Gryffindor for breaking into my office." Feeling utterly bewildered at his words, I whirled around. Severus had a provocative gleam in his eyes when I glared at him. The stubborn Slytherin simply had to be dramatic about it, as usual.
"Ms. Jackson is that true," asked a confused Professor McGonagall. The irritating smirk on Severus' lips dared me to protest.
Reluctantly, I tore my gaze from him to look at my Head of House. Her stern eyes bore into mine, impatiently waiting for an explanation. My mother's words were ringing in the back of my mind and gave me the reassurance I needed.
"No, it isn't," I said calmly and folded my hands behind my back. Severus' lips twitched when he noticed my gloating. "But some say the truth lies in the eye of the beholder."
Sighing, Professor McGonagall shook her head. She cast Severus a disapproving look, obviously assuming that this was another meaningless banter not worth her energy. Professor Flitwick looked slightly lost next to his tall colleagues. A thoughtful frown had settled on his features.
"Leave now, Jackson," Severus sneered, "before I change my mind and give you detention."
I wanted to laugh, but with the Head of Ravenclaw present, I could only smile at him. "I wish you a good afternoon, sir."
Severus raised a black eyebrow before his sharp gaze flickered briefly to the door. My lips stretched into a beaming smile when I finally left his office. Confident, bouncing steps betrayed the happiness and peace that had settled in the depth of my soul, lighted me up inside, gave me a serenity I had never felt before. It was like the breaths I had taken until today had not been full, like the smiles I had smiled had been incomplete somehow.
Just being in the same room with Severus was my favourite place in the world. It was him that created the warmth in my soul, him that filled me with love and kept the fire burning in my eyes. If that was not pure happiness I did not know what was, so I would let it be my own definition, the one I kept with me always.