Hey everyone, I owe you all another apology... I decided to try and write as much of the next couple chapters as I could and sadly, we are coming to end of this little story. I do have more planned for future stories. Also, I will be posting an Atlantis story soon!

Anyway, hope you all enjoy this next chapter! I know it took forever and I'm sorry.

And a special note to the amazing Sam! I hope this makes up for short chapters, weeks of waiting, and not enough emotion! Haha! You are the best!

And as always, thank you, to my most amazing beta! She talks me off ledges, keeps me grounded and is always so encouraging!

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Stargate characters or their world, but boy if I did... hahaha!

Chapter 6

With a Broken Heart That's Still Beating

Christmas Day

Daniel rolled over, throwing his arm over his eyes, his brows knit together. He was still entangled in the vivid threads of the dream-turned-memory he had woken with. He let out a deep sigh, the ache in his chest that had been his waking companion grew. For a minute, he could still see her smile; feel the ghost of her soft skin slipping against his, the revenant of her heat curled against him. He could still remember the taste of her lips as he eased her onto her back, his hand slipping along the back of her thigh as he guided it over his hip.

Her arching against him, her small fingers digging into his chest, her gasping against his mouth. One of his hands finding its way to the small of her back, gently holding her there. His other arm moved to cradle her neck. A short time later, he lifted his head, staring down at her; it was suddenly difficult to breathe. He had always thought she was uncommonly pretty, but in that moment she was something far more: a flush covering her pale skin, lips slightly parted, whispering his name. She had held his gaze with a heavy lidded one of her own, letting him see everything she felt. He had been caught there in that moment in them, by the play of emotion he saw there.

Daniel moved his arm from his eyes, staring unseeingly at his bedroom ceiling, the furrow in his brow growing closer if that was even possible. All of this: how he felt was all wrapped up and woven into the feelings welling inside him even now. He had been able to separate himself from the memory of her before he saw her again. It had been a hard won fight, but he had or so he told himself. Now however he could not even come close. He had even tried to coldly rationalize what had happened between them as basically a brief sexual encounter, something most adult experienced at least once in their lives. Everything inside him, every fibre of who he was rebelled against such an explanation for her; such an easy dismissal of what happened between them. It wasn't lost on him that he had explained another to himself that way since Sha're, but he could not do that with Addison. She was different, what happened between them was different. He knew if things were not how they were, that night would have been a beginning.

Daniel stomach tightened, bringing him back to the present. For a few brief hours he had lost himself in the idea of having her in his life. He had lost himself in her laughter and her teasing. In eating ice cream and remembering again what it felt like to spend time with someone just because. She had put him completely at ease like she always did and he forgotten for a little while that his life was not a simple one.

He had lost himself in other things as well. In the feel of her. How her small frame had seemed to fit perfectly against his. How she had made him feel. But it had been more than that, so, so much more: it was them. He had lost himself in them; too them. That had all began when she asked him if he wanted to do something with her. She had blindsided him. He was not always the most articulate with women in romantic situations but their encounter had been one of the ones he would remember most. He still felt embarrassment even now when he remembered asking her "if she was sure."

An image of her laughing after they had ended up a tangled pile of limbs on the roller skating rinks floor, danced through his head. That one was followed quickly by another of her spectacular failure skating backwards. A faint smile tugged at his lips, she had laughed at herself that time as well. That was something, he himself had never quite mastered.

He had forgotten why being close to someone like this was such a bad idea, period, but especially with her. She would be far too easy to fall for. It wasn't that he hadn't heard the little voice that warned him things would feel different in the cold light of day; it was that he hadn't listened.

Those thoughts changed morphing into another memory, one even more painful. Letting her walk out of his life had been far harder than Daniel had been prepared for. She had been so shy. So hesitant. So disarmingly and surprisingly vulnerable. She had stepped into his kitchen the next morning barefoot, dressed in the same shirt and jeans from the night before, her short dark hair a tussled mess. Her full lips were slightly swollen from him the night before. The uncertainty and shyness in the look she gave him had fuelled the chaos brewing inside him. All thought had fled, he knew what he needed to do but he could not. Even now, he felt a lump form in his throat. Seeing the girl who always laughed at everything so unsure, like she had been when she suggested they go out the night before did something to him he would not let himself contemplate, even now. All Daniel let himself admit was she had completely disarmed him yet again.

The memory continued making that lump grow: Addison catching her bottom lip between her teeth, a soft smile dancing about her mouth.

"Hi," she had said, her cheeks growing redder. She had reached up, tucking an errant hair behind her ear, her attention dropping away from him.

Daniel had stood there unable to do anything besides stare at her for that heartbeats span of time, so many things assailing him. She was so beautiful, tenderness spread through his chest, despite the knot already formed in his stomach. In that moment, he had wanted her so desperately and not in the physical sense. He wanted the girl that charmed him until he agreed to go roller skating and smacked him in the nose with her forehead when she tried to kiss him. The girl that laughed at and teased him incessantly if the mood struck her. The girl who would let him talk about things most had little patience for. It wasn't just that she let him, she was curious and interested. The girl that was so uncertain in this moment, that it made him want what he couldn't have, almost desperately.

Daniel had taken one halting step closer, his first impulse was to duck his head and catch her lips. Reality was there to chase the thought and the tenderness away, however and stop any movement. "I–I'm," he'd stammered. "Tha...that," he'd tried again. "What what I mean," he'd tried a third time, watching what he could see of her downturned face. He had opened his mouth to tell her was sorry, but how could he.

She'd looked back up at him then. The blush that still faintly stained her skin had grown darker once more and those blue eyes had dropped to his lips. Daniel had known right there if he did not say what he needed to say now, he would not. "My life is too complicated," Daniel had blurted, not a stammer in sight. He had envisioned taking some of the roughness from the words, but he didn't. It was not possible.

Addy's gaze had snapped back to his, chasing away any further thoughts. Her brow had furrowed, the shyness and other qualities fading away. She'd looked confused for a half a second, then uncertain and then understanding slowly had dawned in her eyes. Not an understanding that his life was too complicated, but an understanding that he had just slept with her and was….

Addison attention had dropped quickly, she'd stepped back folding her arms over her chest in a defensive movement. "Oh… I–I see."

In that moment, he'd wanted to take it back. –All back. He didn't want to hurt her. He had looked around the room for something; anything that could help. Then he had stupidly offered her the cup of coffee he had just poured for her…

Shoving the memory off, Daniel threw back his blankets and sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of his bed. He grabbed his glasses from his nightstand, peering through the lenses to check for smudges. He used the edge of his t-shirt to clean them off before he slipped them on. He had managed to do exactly what he had told himself not to do. Oh, He had continued to research PX336 and put together some info for Sam to add to what she was compiling for her report, but he had spent an inordinate amount of time thinking about Addy yesterday. That had begun with him reliving the other night over and over again. He had seen the futility of his actions but he couldn't help it.

From there he had wondered where she was. Last year she had told him her and her dad went to spend the holiday with family, nearly every year. If his memory served him correctly she said, they had ever since her mother died.

The day before she left last year, she had slid into the empty side of his booth. She had only sat still long enough to hand him a Christmas card and a cookie tin and gift him with a brilliant smile and a wink across the table.

"Merry Christmas, Professor," she said, leaving Daniel with the tin in his hands, watching her as she hurried out the door, feeling a little bemused. Inside the tin he had found homemade chocolate chip cookies, butterscotch haystacks and a note that said, Merry Christmas, I hope they are as good as you remember. All he could do was stare at them for a moment. She had asked him what his favorite holiday treat was a few days before. He had said chocolate chip cookies then quickly amended his statement. Butterscotch Haystacks. His mom had always made them for him, that part he had not shared. Daniel had sat there staring at them, for a sometime. Not knowing what do with the idea that she had not only remembered but that she had made them for him. A friendly, sweet gesture yes, but he still didn't know exactly how to explain what he had been feeling.

Christmas had never been a huge deal to him, not after his parents died, but before they died it had been. When he was little, they had had the Christmas tree and presents, but it hadn't stopped there. His parents had shared their cultural experiences with him and knowledge with him. For instance, he had always known Santa Claus was actually from Lapland and not the North Pole. He had also known that the ancient Scandinavian festive celebration of Yöl was where the Yule Log tradition came from. That might be fairly common knowledge or at least, most people could tell you the tradition was European. He had known when he started school that the traditional Yule Log burned for twelve days and that every spark or ember from it represented a head of cattle or fish or piece of the harvest for the coming year.

He could still remember that last Holiday season with his parents, the memories brought with them an often felt hollowness to his chest. His father had accepted a job as Professor of Archaeology at the University of Barcelona. That meant they would be living in Spain by the end of the following year. He couldn't remember everything from that time, he had barely turned seven but Daniel knew the idea of leaving had been terrifying. He had always had a difficult time making friends as a child or knowing just how he fit in. Most children that young had an easy time making friends but not him. Even then he had found it hard and most of his attempts to make friends or to be accepted ended with derision and taunting. He did have one friend however, her name was Hope. Her father was director of acquisitions at the museum, his parents worked for. Daniel did not want to leave Hope.

His mother had been so determined to show him that this move would be good, she had started educating him on local customs. Over the Christmas holiday, Daniel had had a Christmas tree and Santa on Christmas but they had also celebrated The Festival of the Three kings. His parents had even dressed up as Melchior and Balthasar to give him a present like the kings traditionally did for the children of Spain on Epiphany. It hadn't actually occurred to Daniel that his parents had been a king short until after their death. A faint smile tugged at his lips. He could still see them dancing around in turbans made of a gold shiny material and robes that had really just been their bathrobes and sheets. His mom had served them the sweet treat, Roscon de Reyes, or Ring of the Kings, after dinner. She had asked Daniel if they should buy theirs from an authentic Spanish bakery next year or if she should make it herself. As usual that memory was bittersweet and tinged with longing. Daniel pushed past it. So much had changed for him in the next months. He had lost both his parents and his only friend. As time passed Daniel had very little interest in the holiday. He had celebrated with friends on occasion and Sarah when they were together. It was different if you had someone to spend it with, but he rarely did. If left to his own devises, Daniel would not even bother with the holiday, besides maybe going out to a restaurant for lunch.

This year, he found himself maybe not wishing things were different, but wondering what they'd been like if they were. And they were, he supposed at least different than spending them alone in a restaurant. He was going to Sam's and had for the last couple years but since she asked about his grandfather, Daniel had almost begun to wish Nicholas was around. Not that Nicholas Ballard had ever really filled the role of grandfather period, let alone at Christmas. Daniel had gotten the occasional card or letter on his birthday or late Christmas gift, that Nicholas had most likely sent to the foster home two prior to where Daniel was currently living.

Contrary to the past, Daniel did think things would have been different if his grandfather was here not on an alien planet. When Nick apologized for leaving him in foster care all those years, Daniel had felt something shift. Something change, those words didn't change the past but had held far more importance than Daniel would have ever guessed. He had always summarily dismissed his grandfather's action or at least he had as he got older as those of a man obsessed. He had not known until now just how much emotion he had buried because he had been left.

Daniel stood, checked his watch as he made his way to out of his bedroom.

It was only a few minutes past eight, hours before he was supposed to go to Sam's. But he had planned on getting up early so he could go over the information he had collected for her. He stepped into the kitchen, checking to make sure he had filled the filter on the coffee maker, before he grabbed the pot filling it with water. After he had that taken care of that he left the kitchen heading through the living room to the room that served as his home office or library. He moved toward the old library table complete with a brass desk lamp. He had left books and photos and notebooks scattered across it last night before he had finally gone to bed and he needed to sort through this notes and make sure he had everything he needed to take to Sam.

XxxX

Addison tucked her flannel clad legs tightly under her so there was room for both of her cousins on the small brown leather loveseat bedside her. A small stack of opened present and the contents of her Christmas stocking lay on the floor in front of her. Pulling her hair up into a short spiky ponytail, she yawned loudly. She was waiting for another pot of coffee to finish brewing. She had been the first up at about six twenty and hadn't slept at all. The last time she had woken up it was somewhere around six, a heavy knot in her stomach.

She had laid there for almost twenty minutes, staring at the play of shadow dancing across the ceiling. No clear thought in her head only many of him blending together. Some more vibrant and vivid than others. They weren't all from their night together, many of them from much further back. Like the first time he had ever made her breath catch in her chest. It truly hadn't taken much at all. Just Addy saying she was glad he was back after a week or two absence and the look he had given her. She had actually told him she had missed him, only half joking. Then he had looked at her like he was searching for something in her words, she had flushed scarlet, the world seeming to melt away. What was passing between them enveloped her. He stumbled over his reply, making the breathless feeling grow. Grace joked about his eyes and his lips and how handsome he was. And he was, almost perfectly so.

But it wasn't that. As cliché as it might sound he was so different from most of the other men she had known. She was usually a sucker for the sweet talker who would make a complete and total ass out themselves just to embarrass her or catch her eye. Or the super confident guy who had no trouble asking a girl out. Daniel had never even hit on her or flirted even and he wasn't super confident, but still, he could make her feel breathless with just a look.

The heavy knot in her stomach slowly gave way to a bittersweet pang. It had washed over her at first; in a tidal wave; swamping her. It made the ache in her stomach intensify for a brief second before, the wave ebbed, leaving nothing but the bittersweet.

Turning away from the memories, she had drug herself from bed, hoping to get at least one cup of coffee into her before the house turned into a mad house. She had managed to get one cup and another but she was pretty certain this was going to be at least a three or four cup day. The others had gotten up, Addy had gone to the bathroom and it cost her her third cup. It was Christmas morning, discarded wrapping paper lay scattered across the dark blue area rug, a fire burned in the fireplace and outside all was blanketed in white. She couldn't remember a Christmas morning that she had not yawned repeatedly since she was a kid. She could only conclude that waking up at the crack of dawn was much more exhilarating as a child. This year felt a little worse than normal. They had actually gotten up later this year but that was most likely because they had not even gotten back from the ranch until around quarter past one. Addy refused to even think about what had kept her up until nearly three and kept waking her up. Beside her on the couch, her cousin Amanda held up the yellow cable knit sweater with rolled cuffs she had just unwrapped, the unruly mass of blond corkscrew curls on her head bouncing around her shoulders.

The fifteen year old smiled brightly, her chocolate eyes almost sparkling.

Addy smiled in return. "Cute."

"Wait till you see yours?" Chrissy said, as she handed Addy what was obviously a shirt box wrapped in red and green wrapping paper, with penguins and polar bears dressed in Santa hats on it.

"Chrissy," her aunt exclaimed, from the chair by the fireplace.

At the same time Amanda hollered at her sister.

"Sorry," Chrissy offered to her mom. She simply stuck her tongue out at her sister.

Addy just met the bright blue eyes of the older girl and winked.

Amanda's attention returned to Addy and she explained. "It's my present, for you."

"I'm sure it's great," Addy said as she tore the paper from the box.

She lifted the grey-blue, crew neck sweater, with light grey baseball shirt style sleeves from the box. "I love it," Addy said smiling at Amanda.

"You do?" The fifteen year old enquired excitedly.

"Yeah, I love it," Addy assured her, and she did. Addy scooted forward, slipped the light garment on over the thermal she wore. Pulling the long cuffs back a bit, she leaned further over and grabbed the small box containing the guardian angel necklace Chrissy had gotten her.

"I think it will look good with this," Addy said, pulling the small charm and it's chain form within. She winked at Amanda as she undid the clasp and put it on. Her attention shifted to the older girl. She was presently perched on the arm of her mother's chair. Addy smiled again.

"Mom said, blue was the best color. And you like baseball tees," Amanda said drawing Addy's attention back to her.

Addy nodded, she supposed she did. She had a fair amount of them, she liked how the shoulders and sleeves were made. "I like the way the sleeves are made."

Addy watched Amanda as she hurried back toward the tree. Grabbing two more presents from beneath the huge Balsam fir, covered in mismatched ornaments. She handed one to her mother then handed other to Addy's dad, where he sat on edge of foot high hearth, close to her mom. "It's from me, Uncle," Amanda explained.

"Us," Chrissy corrected, earning a quick glare from her sister.

"It is," her father said smiling at both girls and seemingly oblivious to their tiff. "I wonder what it could be," he quarried. Lifting the box up, he shook it by his ear, a deliberately perplexed look in his twinkling eyes, just like he would do when they were little and announced their gift.

And Amanda giggled just like she always had. Addy watched as her father made a show of unwrapping his package, then paused. "Well I say," he said pulling a fishing vest complete with new flies sticking into the canvas fabric.

"I made most of them!" Amanda offered excitedly.

"I had practice," Chrissy defended.

"They took a class," her aunt Genie added, giving both girls a look that said enough.

"Really? Well, what did you make?" Addison Palmer asked giving his younger sister a narrow look.

Genie shrugged, playfully scowling at her older brother. "Well, I bought the vest."

"That's more than I received," Addy's uncle Matt chimed in, reminding her aunt that she had forgotten his presents at home. Just as he had done about ten thousand times since she had told him what she had done yesterday. It wasn't that her uncle really cared, he just liked to get under her aunts skin.

Her aunt gave an irritated sigh. "Why don't you remind me again," her aunt said, exasperation in her voice that the twinkle in her eyes belied.

Addy smiled watching them. This was just how they were: always playing with each other. When Addy had been a kid, they had made her nervous. To anyone who didn't know better, they would think they were bickering, but nothing could be further from the truth. The dry sarcasm and jibes was just how they were. They weren't serious. They were just playing.

Amanda interrupted her parents as she dropped a present in her father's lap. "It's from uncle," she explained.

Casting one last condemning look in his wife's direction, he said, "at least someone remembered me." He shared a conspiratorial look with Addy's father.

"Does it count, if I'm the one who picked out?" Addy through out there, a smile on her face. And she had. She always picked out the gifts and her father supplied the currency.

Her uncle cocked one blond brow as he met her gaze. Apparently, it didn't when he found a new bait cast reel inside.

Addy watched for a moment more before her gaze drifted toward the fire place, her stomach tightening. Apparently, no matter what her resolve, fate was determined to make sure Daniel stayed on her mind, ever since Grace had told Addy she had seen him. Silently scoffing at herself, she amended, who are you trying to kid: you've been thinking about Daniel every day, at least once day since about two weeks before winter break began. Now it was even worse. She had known she would and if she were being honest, she had expected to obsess over him. She was obsessive by nature and that was great when you were ironing out details for a term paper, but not when it came to this. Point of reference: her hoping he would be at Ruby's the other night. But she had expected to do her pining secretly and silently.

Last night was another occasion of fate working against her. Addy, her father and the rest of her family had gone to the ranch as planned. Addison had been determined to not think about Daniel, to have a nice evening and just stop. All thinking about him achieved was to bring back all the hurt and confusion of a few months ago. It made her feel stupid for it still hurting her so much.

She was fully aware how much she sounded like the pages of a Nicholas Sparks novel, but she couldn't seem to let this go. And her encounter with him, coupled with his visit to Ruby's it was even harder. She had been far from prepared for their encounter or how seeing him made her feel as she had already established. But pointing out to herself, how stupidly childish she sounded did not seem to change anything. The hurt and confusion was still very much there and still very much real. In that one night, she had wholly and completely fallen for him. Any part of her that hadn't before that night did then.

Sarah and Cole had built a bonfire and sprayed part of the yard down so the kids could ice skate. Addy had grabbed her jacket and wandered out on the porch to drink her buttered rum and watch them play. Sarah had followed her out there a few minutes later, they had stood there side by side for a few minutes watching.

Sarah had asked, "Who was your friend?"

No small talk. Straight to the point as usual, Addy had immediately known who Sarah was talking about but for some reason had only been able to respond, "Hmm?"

The soft patient smile that slipped onto Sarah's face was one Addy knew well. It said, take your time, but I decide how much time you need before I start with more questions. After a less than a minute she asked, "Daniel? Wasn't that his name?"

Chrissy plopped down on the couch where her sister had been sitting, drawing Addy from her thoughts. Addy smiled at the younger girl. She scooted closer, dropping her head on Addy's shoulder. Addy in turn, rested her cheek on Chrissy's head for a moment. Chrissy was the complete opposite of her sister. Where Amanda was fair haired and had the complexion of her father, Chrissy favored Addy and the Palmer side of the family.

Chrissy was five foot seven at least and Addy was only five foot five but Chrissy had the dark hair and blue eyes and slight dusting of freckles across the bridge of her nose like Addison. They were similar in many ways actually. Chris played softball, basketball, and ran cross country like Addy had. She loved being outside and fishing and snowboarding and hiking. She wanted to go to work for the forestry department. Amanda was a cheerleader who'd rather be at the mall and was already talking about getting her masters of business administration.

The timer on the coffee pot went off.

"I'll get it," Addy said, getting up once Chrissy sat up.

"I'll help," Amanda said.

Addy shook her head, "I got it, you guys stay."

Later that day

Brows drawn, Jack watched Daniel as the younger man made his way down the hall behind Samantha Carter's father.

They were discussing PX336. Selmak, Jacob Carter's symbiote, had offered to take a look at the research and see if anything was familiar. Then he added a but. There was always a but, even if it was a hidden but and not called a but, there always was a but with these guys. There were races out there that had lived so long ago that the Tok'ra knew nothing about them. Sam and Daniel would both argue that that was entirely possible and that may be, but to Jack that just sounded like a built in out, in case it was inconvenient. Maybe Jacob or Selmak could shed some light on the mystery, but Jack would reserve judgement. Jack was never quite certain how he felt about the one time air force general now Tok'ra operative. Jacob Carter was never overly warm, which suited Jack O'Neal just fine. The part he had the issue with or that sometimes irritated him was that like, all the Tok'ra, he only shared what he thought the Tauri needed to know. That, at least, as far as Jack was concerned, left out a lot of essential information that could be considered pertinent. The arm bands, for instance. Jacob was not involved in that instance but the point still stood. Jack had the gut feeling the Tok'ra knew far more about the devises from the very beginning than Freya had let on, never mind Anise, her symbiote. And not just about the deleterious effects it had on the body, though he expected they knew that as well.

It wasn't any of that, however, that had Jack's attention. As engaged as Daniel appeared in conversation with Jacob about that planet he and Sam were currently obsessed with, he had been distracted through most of dinner. Really distracted at times.

Jack jumped up, grabbing the platter of leftover turkey from the table and followed Sam and Teal'c into the kitchen. Jack placed the platter on the counter near the sink then walked back around the island and leaned against it. He caught Carter's gaze, nodding toward Daniel as he and Jacob stepped back into the dining room, still deep in conversation. Her blue eyes skated past him and she shrugged.

"What's going on?" Jack mouthed softly, watching as Sam kept spooning mashed potatoes into an orange Tupperware bowl.

Sam gave Daniel another quick glance, when she finished. She snapped the lid on the bowl. "I'm not sure," she said, as she started spooning stuffing into the next awaiting storage container.

Jack looked over his shoulder, brow scrunched up, giving the younger man another quick look. At present, Daniel and Jacob stood close together, heads bent over an open folder Daniel held. Attention shifting back to Sam, Jack asked the first question that came to mind, "Is this about the girl from the restaurant the other night?" Sam didn't really need to answer. Whoever she was there was something there. Jack wasn't really one for involving himself in others' personal lives, and he might have forgotten all about her, if Daniel hadn't been so obviously ready to get away from everyone afterward. "Have you talked to him?" Jack inquired before Sam could reply.

Sam nodded, "Briefly but not really?" Jack nodded like he understood, but had absolutely no idea what that meant. Sam continued without him having to ask questions. "I stopped by the mountain on Saturday and he was there."

"I see," he said, though nothing was really made any clearer. "So you don't know what is going on?"

"I think they were more than friends," she began, looking up at Jack. "He looked like a guy with things he wanted to say, and she looked like a girl who..." Sams words trailed off as she tried to find the right one. "She looked like the girl who's been hurt."'

"I agree with Major Crater," Teal'c said after having stayed quiet until now. "It would appear Daniel Jackson has feelings for this girl. She did indeed look hurt."

Crossing his ankles Jack leaned more heavily on the tiled countertop. "Neither of you asked?" He inquired, his attention passing between Teal'c and Sam.

Teal'c said, "No, I have not."

Sam simply shook her head, her attention moving to what Jack could only assume must be Daniel before it came back to him. "I hung around for a while. I was hoping he would open up on his own. But he didn't. I told him if he needed to talk about anything, he knew where to find me." Sam finished putting the stuffing in another storage bowl, then said, "I don't know for certain what's going on, but I think he's hurting."

Jack still wasn't so certain what he thought. None of them really had time for relationships. Jack spent far less time at the mountain than Daniel or Sam and he would still find it difficult to juggle having someone in his life and SG-1.

With Carter and Daniel, it would be even more difficult. They basically did nothing that did not pertain to their work. He understood being dedicated, but as far as he knew they chose to spend much more time there than they needed to. Daniel would even stay the night, catching a quick nap in one the state rooms if he found something distracting enough to work on.

Jack spent most of the rest of the afternoon observing and listening. Listening to a discussion on an ancient long dead culture was a little too much like a briefing at work but he listened anyway. Well, he'd listened until he had started wishing his ears would bleed, at which point he had wandered to Sams living room and watched part of the Titan vs Cowboys game. He wasn't going to, he had set up his VCR to tape it and he hated coming into a game in the middle and missing half the action, but when the alternative was extreme boredom, Jack decided he would watch anyway. It was a hell of game. It ended with a shutout. The Titian's took the Cowboys, thirty-one to nothing.

And it did turn out that the Tok'ra knew something of the planet and surprisingly, at least to Jack, Selmak was willing to share. But after the symbiote explained what he knew, it was not so surprising he had been willing to share it. Basically, it was nothing important. The planet's actual name had began with a 'na' sound. The Tok'ra sometimes used the uninhabitable planet to rendezvous and hand off intel or to hide things. From what the Tok'ra had been able to learn, the original inhabitants were a peaceful people, not fighters. Even less was known about the race that killed the people, besides they were monsters and another race called the An something had fought them trying to save the people.

Jacob went on to say that whoever the race with the planet killing technology was, the Tok'ra were certain had been destroyed by the An something. The An something had also long since vanished. Jack was thoroughly surprised he had retained that much information but was certain most of it would be forgotten by tomorrow.

Jack was not really so certain what spurred him to start the conversation that he did next. He did think there was something wrong when a person was more excited about what they found in a book than the real world around them, but really it was a matter of to each his own. He just liked to irritate Daniel and Sam, so he gave them a hard time about spending so much time at the mountain. Well, maybe he wasn't so much irritating Sam but he was pretty certain he got under Daniels skin on occasion, but it was still true. There was a whole world out there waiting. Originally, Jack could understand Daniel's obsession. He had wanted to find his wife. Jack could also understand Daniel throwing himself back into his work with renewed vigor after Sha're's death. Jack had originally joined the program because of his son's death. And then there had been Sha're or Amunet's child to find, but Daniel continued to work as hard. They rarely talked about personal things, but Jack wondered if Daniel had ever even thought of moving on or getting back out there. Daniel was sometimes so infuriatingly noble and self-sacrificing, Jack wanted to shake him. He probably told himself having anyone in his life wasn't fair to them.

"Hey," Jack said, after the others left the room. "Thanks for the gloves.'"

His thank you was met with a suspicious amount of silence and a flat look from Daniel. "You are welcome. It only took you three years."

"Really, I've never said thank you in three years?" Jack asked. Surprised to find out he hadn't, but at the same time, not.

Daniel's brows furrowed but he didn't comment, leaving Jack to shrug.

"How are things?" Jack asked.

Daniel stared at him for a minute, surprised by the other man's question. Jack wasn't one for small talk at all and if he attempted it, there was usually a reason. Daniel's brow furrowed, Jack was watching him expectantly and usually, if he asked that question, it didn't really require a reply. "Fine," Daniel replied, the word coming out more like a question.

Not really the best with words and certainly not when it came to talking feelings with other men, or women for that matter, Jack didn't say anything for a moment. Taking a swig from his beer, he gave it a try. "Anything new?"

"Not really."

Jack nodded, looking towards the kitchen doorway. He really didn't know what he was supposed to say. He had absolutely no idea what the connection was there. As much time as Daniel spent at the mountain, Jack doubted she was someone he was seeing or dated, but Sam and Teal'c both felt there was something there.

"You know, when I first joined up, I had this dog," Jack began.

Daniel's brows furrowed and he listened, mildly curious as to where this story was going. "Yeah?"

"Yeah, I had had him since I was about nine. He was a lab. Black lab, smartest damn bird dog I ever had. When I got back from basic he was so happy to see me, he knocked me over in the doorway." He paused. "I sometimes wonder, if I hadn't listened and gave him to the cousin's kid, if it wouldn't have been better for him."

"What happened to him?"

"By the time I got home again, he was gone. My mom said, he just laid by the back door waiting for me."

Daniel watched the older man for a moment, still uncertain where Jack had been going with that story but certain there was a message. "I'm sorry," he offered.

"The point is, life is short and sometimes it's nice knowing someone cares, even if it is a dog," Jack trailed off. ''But hell, what do I know.…."

"So you think, I should get a dog?" Daniel asked slowly, his brows knit together.

After a moment of silence, and a long stare, Jack continued with a shrug, "Yeah, or you know, a friend."

Daniel stared at Jack for a moment, understanding dawning. "I see," he just really didn't want to talk about this.

Jack went on, "You know, there's lots of really good reasons not to be with someone. You fight. You want different things. She likes Chinese and you'd rather have pizza." He trailed off as if weighing that last one, he shrugged, looking back over at Daniel. "Maybe you only need one really good one to be with them."

Daniel looked down at the floor, he really didn't need or want anyone sharing there opinions or thoughts. None of them knew what happened, and he had no intention of telling them, he was almost ready to tell Jack to leave it, when he spoke again.

"Do you care about her?" Jack asked in the first direct reference to the woman from the other night.

For some reason that question brought him up short, Daniel's brows lifted, his lips almost pursing. His gaze came back to Jack.

"Hell, I could be way off the mark here. I don't know what the story is but there was some obvious tension," Jack finished, before Daniel could confirm or deny. "But maybe if you do care about her, that is your one really good reason,"Jack suggested.

That was actually the best possible reason Daniel could come up with for not being with her.

"Now I'm gonna go get some pie," Jack announced, slapping Daniel on the back as he got up.

The next evening

Daniel pulled into Ruby's parking lot, far more nervous than he wanted to admit. He had wrestled with what Jack had said, or tried to wrestle with it. In truth, he hadn't nearly as much as he would have expected himself too. After Jack had gotten past his dog story, what he said had made a lot of sense. And in retrospect the dog story did as well, when put in to context. He had spent most of the day trying to remind himself why this was wrong; why it was such a bad idea. He still had misgivings but Jack had been right. He cared about Addy. He cared about her enough, he should be willing to walk away. Daniel wasn't even certain he understood it himself but it was almost like Jack gave him permission to do what he really wanted to do. Despite knowing what he hoped for, Daniel knew, after what he had done, Addison might not forgive him. He honestly would not blame her if she did not, he ultimately just wanted her to know he never wanted to hurt her.

He did not have her number or address. He had looked in the phone book but there was no Addison Palmer, Colonel or otherwise listed. For a split second he had contemplated using one of the computers at the base to find her. He had even started typing her name and stopped himself. It felt creepy to do it that way. Wrong really.

His gaze slipped over the lighted interior as he turned into one of the parking places along the front. He turned his key, killing the engine and took a deep breath as he opened the door. He knew this was not going to be easy and could very likely prove not pleasant. He suspected Grace knew what had happened between he and Addy and the blonde had a tendency to speak her mind and was fiercely loyal to Addison.

Daniel stepped inside, ignoring the misgivings he had and headed for the counter where Grace stood with her back to him, his attention drifting down her back. Daniel placed his hands on the counter, taking a deep breath.

"Hello, Grace."

xxx

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