Entering the lounge, Jody winced at the horrible combination of loud stereo music and Candi-Rose's shrill voice. Usually, she ignored the noise and managed to get on with doing her own thing, but given the phone call she'd had with Luke a few hours ago and had been dissecting and analysing ever since, it only served to set her teeth on edge. Speaking of phone calls, Candi seemed to be on one now to Sasha, yelling relationship advice down the line as she walked right through Sid, Taz, Floss and Finn's dance line-up. If that wasn't the definition of the blind leading the blind, then she didn't know what was.
Her eyes drifted towards the quietest two in the room, Alex and Chloe, the former perched on the arm of one of the sofas, TV remote sitting idle in his hand, and the latter sitting next to him in her wheelchair. Neither of the two was actually watching the random wildlife programme on TV, though, appearing to be totally fed up by the noise. She instantly looked away the second her gaze met Alex's; he'd been unhappy with her ever since she'd 'rained on Charlie's parade' earlier. Ryan walked in just then, a look of utter confusion spreading across his face. Jody sighed. What she would give to be at the gym right now.
The only reason she was even downstairs was so that Mike and May-Li wouldn't nag her about her spending the entire day in her room, as they had when she'd pulled the same stunt after Tyler had left. In any case, it was about an hour until dinnertime, so she sucked it up and went to the kitchen, sitting down at the head of the empty table. She didn't really want to be at the table, didn't really want to stare at eleven jolly, carefree faces for the duration of yet another meal, but sitting at the breakfast bar would only draw unwanted attention; since Tyler had left, there were enough chairs around the table for all of the residents to take their meals together in one sitting. As such, the breakfast bar had really become what its name suggested.
Alas, her peaceful solitude didn't last because Alex entered the kitchen not long after she had. She'd forgotten he was cooking tonight. To his credit, he largely ignored her as he went about getting his ingredients out, and she ignored him right back. She didn't know why he was making such a big deal of what she'd said earlier. All she'd done was look out for his girlfriend. Was that a crime now?
The trouble had started sometime after lunch when some of the kids had gathered around Alex and Charlie in the kitchen and started to say stupidly optimistic things about mums and daughters; Melanie, Charlie's mother, had got out of prison a couple of weeks ago and Charlie had been hanging out with her practically every single day since. Charlie had also inherited her granddad's house, the house she and Melanie had both grown up in, though it was being held in trust until she turned eighteen. That was all well and good but having experienced heartbreak at the hands of an ex-con mother herself, Jody had simply done what she saw as her duty both as a friend and a decent person by warning Charlie not to get too attached to Melanie.
However, her well-intended words had backfired. Not only had Charlie stormed off in a strop, but Alex had had a go at Jody straight after, accusing her of wanting Charlie and Melanie to fail because she and Denise had. He was lucky she hadn't decked him in the face like she had Amabel and Ryan before him; the only reason she hadn't was that she'd had to rush upstairs to hide how much his words had stung. The Luke situation had made her soft, much softer than she cared to admit.
Looking at him now, she found that the emotional wound was still smarting. This wouldn't do. She was already bogged down by things she couldn't say to Luke and Millie; if she kept her upset at Alex pent up as well, she would implode.
"What you said to me after lunch was bang out of order, you know?" she said, staring right at him. He looked up from the chopping board he'd just set down on the breakfast bar, frowning. "Just because I'm never going to go back to my family, it doesn't mean I don't want anyone else to. I'm not like that. If I was, don't you think I would've gone nuclear when Tyler left to live with his mum?"
Alex shrugged. "You were pretty upset."
"Yeah, upset, like you were when Kazima left." He blinked. The thought had clearly never occurred to him. "Not jealous, or something stupid like that," she continued, holding his gaze. She considered telling him that she had actually been the one to convince Tyler to go after he'd told her he didn't want to but decided against it. Selfless deeds ceased being selfless once one bragged about them or used them to make a point. "Look, I would never try to get in the way of someone else's happiness, especially another care kid's. I know I'm going to be stuck here until I'm too old for the system so seeing other care kids go back to their families or finding new ones actually makes me happy."
He nodded, momentarily looking down. "I'm sorry. I guess I just thought you were trying to mess things up for her because you went through the exact same thing. You know, with the mum who went prison and that."
"Well, that's why I spoke up in the first place. Sometimes, ex-cons use people close to them for money. It's happened to me, so I know what it's like. I don't know if you already know this—maybe one of the others told you—but after his first stint in prison, my brother made me steal from everyone else in the house, even Mike and May-Li, so he could sell their stuff off to make money."
"Yeah, I think someone mentioned it. I was exactly like your brother at one point. I mean, I'm not an ex-con but I used Kazima when I needed money as well. I only realised what a shitty move it was after I got help. But Melanie wouldn't do that, would she? Use Charlie, I mean?"
She released a deep breath. It was difficult to say. She hadn't been able to see through her own family members until it had been too late so how could she with someone she barely knew? "I don't know. She could turn out to be decent like your mum, but, let's face it, she'll probably turn out to be more like mine. All I'm saying is that Charlie should be careful."
"How do you mean?"
"I don't know. Look out for dodgy behaviour, I guess? You can help; you're good at that stuff." He smirked, not even bothering to deny it. "You went to visit Melanie with her last time, right?"
He suddenly straightened up, his smirk slipping. "Err, yeah," he answered, placing an onion on the chopping board. "We're going to see her again tomorrow... At her flat."
"Well, there you go," she said, raising a brow. Why was he acting kind of jittery all of a sudden? Realising that he was about to cut the onions, she immediately leapt up from her seat. Her eyes were horribly sensitive to those things, even when someone else was doing the cutting. Back to the lounge, it was... unlike Charlie, who seemed to have been holed up in her room since she'd stormed off. "Charlie is okay, isn't she? I didn't see her downstairs."
Alex smiled. "Yeah, she's fine. She was a little upset, you know, after what you said, but I told her that you were just trying to protect her. And you were. I'll check on her again, after I get this stuff cooking."
Jody nodded, smiling bittersweetly as she left the kitchen. Despite her insistence that she didn't get jealous of her fellow care kids, she couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy as she thought about how Alex always looked out for Charlie. It was times like these she wished more than ever that Tyler still lived at Ashdene Ridge; without him, she'd find herself sinking back into a bout of agonising over Luke in no time.
.:. QK .:.
It seemed like forever before Jody was allowed to return to the gym but once she stepped through those blue double doors, she sighed in relief. Being trapped at home for an entire week had been a complete and utter nightmare. Everyone at the house had been too busy dealing with the fall-out of Melanie betraying Charlie, and then Alex's birthday, Sasha had been a total pain to talk to because she was so distracted by her relationship issues, and Tyler hadn't been able to visit very often at all, having been hard-pressed to write a report about 'so fake' crop-circles for his workplace, meaning all Jody had been able to do in her free time was worry about Luke and, more recently, his child.
Millie had already made Luke's life a living hell and would continue to do so indefinitely but what kind of person would she raise their child to be? The toxic environment in their home could only yield another unhappy criminal like Kingsley, and if there was one thing the world could do without, it was people like her eldest brother. As someone who knew first hand what it was like to be raised by a woman like Millie, she didn't want such a life for her niece or nephew but was powerless to help. What could she do when the child would have a mother who'd likely brainwash him/her against her by the time he/she could talk and a father who'd do nothing to stop it? The poor kid was in for a tough ride.
Even if she did somehow find herself in a position to help, what exactly would she be able to do? She couldn't even get past her own bad blood, the Jackson blood, the same blood that ran through the child's veins. As of now, she was just as bad an influence as Kingsley and Denise, and her nephew or niece was better off without her in his/her life. The proof was standing right in front of her in the form of Amabel, whose nose was still bruised purple-black.
A healthy dose of shame welled up in her as she realised she had to have punched Amabel extremely hard because even Ryan's nose hadn't looked quite so bad a week after her mother's funeral. Quickly averting her gaze, she approached the lockers, thankful that no one else was in the room to either make snide comments or snigger in the background. The pair of them took out their equipment and locked their bags away in tense silence, not even looking at one another.
Wondering if she was going to have to make do with Brandon as a part-time sparring partner, Jody turned away first and walked off. She had the door to the corridor halfway open when she heard her name being called. Not her surname either, but her first. She released the door and spun around, just to make sure it was Amabel who'd called her. Indeed, it was.
"Come here for a second?"
Jody couldn't help but be wary. "Why?"
Amabel rolled her eyes, lowering herself onto the nearest bench. "If I wanted to punch you, I would've done it already. And I would've done it back then."
"You did try," Jody said, recalling how Bernadette had held Amabel back from retaliating. Nevertheless, she joined her maybe-sister on the bench.
"Listen," Amabel began, putting her hands together, "I shouldn't have said what I did about your family. It's not your fault you're in care, so it doesn't really make sense as an insult."
"Is this supposed to be an apology?"
"It's the closest you're going to get to one."
A smile tugged at Jody's lips. Now that sounded like Amabel. "For what it's worth, I shouldn't have spoken to you the way I did either. I'm talking about how I spoke before we got into the ring; I still think Amy for Amabel is weird."
"It's what my brother calls me. He came up with it when he was three, so..."
"Oh." Well, it was a nicer name than 'Monkey'. "How old is he now?"
Amabel glanced at her sideways. "Ten." The same age as Benji... "Look, I didn't sit down here for a chat. If we're d—"
"We're not," Jody interjected quickly. "I haven't finished. As I was saying, I shouldn't have been rude to you. I was angry at someone, someone I couldn't talk to at the time, and I guess I just ended up taking it out on you. You were right, though. My dad doesn't know I exist, and I know nothing about family."
"You're not missing out on much. Trust me. Family's overrated."
She thought back to what Tyler had said a few weeks ago, about how important family was. At the time, she'd thought she hadn't understood it because she was still in care (and likely would be until she was eighteen) but now she wasn't so sure. After all, Amabel had presumably been in a family situation her whole life but rarely had anything good to say about the people who'd raised her. Either family wasn't all that great, as Jody had always thought, or Amabel was an ungrateful daughter.
"As someone who's in care an' all, I can't really agree with you. Anyway, didn't you say your mum and your brother were all you needed in life?"
Amabel looked down at her lap. "I did, but it's more complicated than that. Family always is. I'm just saying that having parents, especially a dad, isn't all it's cracked up to be."
"Why not?"
Jody half expected Amabel to tell her to shut up and mind her own business, but she didn't. Instead, she pursed her lips, as if mulling things over, but just when she appeared to be ready to answer, the changing room door swung open. Then, just like that, Amabel clammed up again and abruptly rose to her feet, and Jody inwardly lamented at her loss of progress.
A/N: Four reviews in one go. Now we're talking. Thanks to each and every one of you.
Charlie—Jody's behaviour is not linked to the Series 7B premiere but it's a good guess. :) As for Luke, you'll have to wait and see!
Flower—I see what you mean about the dragging and I get where you're coming from. I actually agree but the story just keeps getting longer and longer. I'm hoping to finish it in 60 chaps so hang in there. I'm also thinking of doing a post-completion edit where I'll take unnecessary bits out and polish the fic up a little. If you can find any obvious places where I can cut it down, please point them out.
yourfire—I just want to say that you're so insightful as always. You've really understood the characters of Jody (as I write her) and Amy so well. Keep reading and reviewing; I look forward to them.