Jody's eyes abruptly snapped open as an impending sense of doom washed over her. Sitting up and throwing the duvet off her body, she glanced at the clock to see that it was seven o'clock on the dot, far too early to be awake on a Saturday. When she thought about lying back down and going to sleep, however, she couldn't bring herself to do it; her restlessness wouldn't let her. So she didn't. Instead, she sat there in silence, wondering if she should start studying early, when she heard movement down the hallway, near the stairs. Maybe she wasn't the only one who couldn't sleep; exam season was upon them, and four, including her, were directly affected.

Knowing she wasn't going to get back to sleep anytime soon, she leapt out of bed and donned her new purple dressing gown before quietly opening her bedroom door and sneaking out. As she carefully descended the stairs, so as not to step on the creak-inducing spots, she saw Chloe wheeling into the kitchen. She followed, walking into the kitchen to see Mike standing by the fridge, handing something to Ryan who looked just about ready to go off on an expedition: he had a backpack slung over one shoulder, a duffel bag over the other, and another lying at his feet. He quickly noticed her, followed by Chloe and then Mike, who looked back at him in concern.

"Early morning, Jodes?" he said before nodding at Mike. Jody side-stepped, letting Mike pass, and Chloe wheeled into the lounge, leaving her alone with her longtime frenemy.

As she approached the breakfast bar, her slow morning brain finally caught up with her body. "You're leaving? I thought things didn't work out with Maureen."

Maureen was the foster carer who'd visited last week with the intention to foster both Ryan and Chloe, but things had quickly gone downhill when their mother had shown up on the same day, demanding to speak to Chloe. Ryan had then gone off somewhere with his mother, and although no one knew what'd happened during that time, he'd returned without her, looking like someone who'd just been cleared of cancer.

"They didn't," he answered. "I'm going to a semi-independent flat near the constabulary. I'll be sixteen in a few days so they're finally going to start paying me."

She raised an eyebrow. "Right before exams, though? And what about Chloe?"

"My exams don't start until next week. I'll be settled by then. And I'm leaving Chloe to you lot. She's not the kid she was when she came here to be with me, and she deserves a life where she's not always worrying about me and my problems. She can handle life without me now."

"Do you actually believe that?" she asked, noticing that he was frowning slightly.

"I'm her older brother, so I'm always going to be a little worried about her. But yeah, I do, because I know she's not like me. She's always fitted in here."

"Because she's always been nice, Ryan. She's never put us down or tried to ruin our lives. Well, except that one time, but I'm sure that was down to you as well."

He nodded and squared his shoulders, as if to say 'that's fair', before releasing a deep breath. "Look, I've done a tonne of things I'm ashamed of, for reasons I don't really want to get into, but believe me when I say that I'm determined to change. No more scheming; no more lies."

She sighed. She'd heard this before, and not just from him, but it was always a lie. Always. "But that's just it. I did believe you, back at Mike's wedding, but then you went and told me I was nothing only a couple of months later. You just can't help yourself."

"I know, and I'm sorry, but I mean it this time. You'll see."

"When?"

"Honestly?" he asked. She nodded. "I don't know. I've got a lot to work out first. I mean, this isn't a fairytale, is it? I'm not going to change overnight."

"I wouldn't expect you to. Even The Beast took a while to turn back into Prince Adam."

That drew a smile from him, one so genuine that she almost pinched herself to make sure she wasn't dreaming. He didn't seem to sense her shock, however, reaching down to grab his other duffel bag. He looked back up at her, still smiling. "You know, if there's ever anything I can do for you, just text me. Maybe then we'll be even again."

"Again? Were we ever even?"

"We were. We became even when you got me back for posting your hate mail to your mum. You're the only person to have done that, you know?"

"Done what?" she asked, blinking. He really wasn't doing himself any favours by reminding her of the letter incident; memories of Luke as he used to be, pre-Millie and pre-uni, were too painful to dwell on or even think about.

"Defeat me. Others tried, and Tee got close, but no one turned the tables on me like you did. I never saw it coming: you getting your brother to nick the letter."

"Thanks, I guess?" she said, crossing her arms. She was flattered, but tried not to show it; Ryan wasn't out of hot water with her just yet. "When did you get one-up on me then?"

His smile vanished in an instant, and he pressed his lips together. Then, after she shot him a prompting look, he spoke, "A few weeks after your mum's funeral. I was still mad about the punch, especially everyone laughing at me afterwards, so when I caught... someone... poking around the recycling bin, holding a pregnancy test packet, I decided to use that to get back at you. I knew there was no way she took the test but I took a photo and blackmailed her anyway. I made her put the packet in the bathroom bin so that someone else would find it, and then point the finger at you when Mike and May-Li eventually asked."

She let out a 'wow' but, in all honesty, she wasn't surprised in the least; she'd already guessed as much, particularly in regards to Candi-Rose's blackmail. Still, it was a relief to know that there hadn't been a second pregnancy test—another scared teenager dealing with a potential pregnancy on her own.

"Poor her," she said. "Did you ever apologise?"

He laughed under his breath. "She got her revenge on me in her own way. Bled me dry for weeks."

Well, that certainly explained the mysterious shopping trips; she'd had the feeling that Chloe had left a few things out during their heart-to-heart a couple of months ago. As if on cue, Chloe wheeled into the kitchen just then, telling Ryan that his taxi had arrived.

Jody looked to him, feeling strangely empty. "I guess this is it. I'll see you at school, then?"

"Probably," he said, before walking out into the lobby.

Chloe trailed behind him, but Jody hung back, leaning on the breakfast bar. This time last year, she'd thought she'd be one of three residents sitting her GCSEs; now, she was the only one left.

.:. QK .:.

The feeling of foreboding persisted well into the next day, such that Jody was still restless by the time she stepped foot in the gym, despite having had a relatively good night of sleep. The only explanation she'd been able to come up with was that she, more anxious than eager to get good grades, was suffering from exam-stress, a situation that could easily be remedied by a good work-out, preferably with Amabel. So, after carelessly stowing her things away in a locker, she ran into the main gymnasium, only to find that Amabel wasn't there and that there was a small crowd forming in front of the noticeboard. Figuring that her sparring partner was in the toilets, she decided to go over to their usual training spot and wait for her when she noticed that Brandon was at the back of the crowd to her right. If he was interested in whatever the rest of them were looking at, it had to be worthwhile.

"What are you all looking at?" she asked, approaching him. She didn't bother to tiptoe and peer over the others' heads; he was tall enough for the both of them.

He turned his head to her, but didn't answer; not out of rudeness, but because he didn't seem to be able to. A knot formed in her throat as she took in the distraught expression on his face because he rarely had reason to look anything other than happy. She looked around, wondering why Amabel wasn't back yet. It wasn't as if she had exams to be studying for; Year Tens didn't sit exams.

"Ugh, whatever!" Jess exclaimed, walking out of the crowd with Emily. "What? Am I meant to feel sorry for her?"

Emily winced, her face pale white. "It just seems a little harsh, Jess. Imagine what her..." Her voice quietened, travelling out of Jody's earshot.

A few more of Jess' group left the fray, the expressions on their faces ranging from indifference to guilt, and a clear line of vision opened up right in front of Jody, revealing a basic sheet of paper reading 'With deep grief'. She couldn't read the rest because of the various heads and shoulders in front of her, but being as petite and lithe as she was, she squeezed in between the couple in front of her, breaking their hand-holding, and pushed right in front of them. Once she read the notice in its entirety, however, she immediately wished she hadn't.

'With deep grief, we announce the passing of Amabel Grey. 13th December 2003–10th May 2019.' She stood there for a while, trying and failing to tear her eyes away from the notice. Amabel had never been a Gray in the first place, a revelation that didn't shock her as much as it would've done a few weeks ago, but what really twisted the knife in was the fact that Amabel had died yesterday, on a Saturday, the one day of the week that Jody did not attend the gym. It felt like a sick joke.

"I just saw her on Friday," she told Brandon, the only other person still standing with her; the others had since dispersed. "She didn't"—her voice cracked—"look like she was dying. God, when did this even happen?" In the morning, while she'd been talking to Ryan? Before? After? In the night, even?

"After she left yesterday," he replied quietly.

Her head snapped towards his. "She was in yesterday?"

"Yeah. She left in tears."

"In tears?" she asked, her stomach clenching. "Why?"

"I don't know but I'm sure it had something to do with her parents. They came in yesterday, and she looked really surprised and worried, like she didn't want them there, but went into Bernadette's office with them anyway. I don't know what went on in there but after like ten minutes she came out crying and her parents looked pissed. Really pissed. They dragged her out after that."

Jody's eyes watered up. No one had to tell her that Amabel had been crying because her deception had been uncovered or that Amabel's death hadn't been brought about by nature. Only a superhuman would've been able to bear the pressure that Amabel's parents had put on her, and she, a girl of barely fifteen, had finally had enough. It was always going to happen, it had just been a matter of when. To think that Amabel had been alive less than twenty-four hours ago.

"I'm sorry, Jody," Brandon said, placing a comforting arm around her. "I know how close you two were."

She stifled a sob at that, closing her eyes in shame; she had indeed been close to Amabel, close enough to know that the Grey family had been destroying her, but hadn't lifted a finger to help. Instead, she'd washed her hands of the girl, thinking her weak and not worthy of her efforts, and had then rejoiced at not being related to her. What did that say about her?

.:. QK .:.

That afternoon, Jody lay on her stomach in bed, her revision guides and exercise books lying open and forgotten on her desk. She had two exams in the upcoming week yet couldn't bring herself to focus on studying for either; Amabel was never far from her mind, haunting her for not caring. A part of her didn't even want to study; why should she get good grades when Amabel, who'd had her entire life in front of her, had been forever robbed of the chance to do so?

"Jody!" Taz called from somewhere in the hallway. "Tyler's here!"

She sat up with a start, rubbing her bleary eyes. Tyler had texted her a couple of times to ask if she was going over to his after gym to study for the English exam, but she hadn't replied at the time because her mind had been all over the place and had then forgotten to altogether. So now she was a bad best friend too, in addition to being a bad person. How had she fallen so low?

"Tell him I'm not feeling well!" she called back, regardless. She couldn't let him see her like this, with her hair sticking up at all angles and dark bags under her eyes. Piper probably never let herself look so ridiculous, even on a bad day.

Taz didn't respond but Jody heard light footfalls down the hallway, so she relaxed and flopped back down on her bed, confident that the younger girl would relay her message. About ten seconds later, however, she heard much heavier footfalls coming up the hallway and chucked the hood of her tracksuit top over her head just in time.

"What are you doing?!" she exclaimed as the door swung open, her voice sounding horrifically whiny. "You know you're not allowed up here!"

Tyler closed the door behind him, looking her up and down. "I don't care. I'm here to talk to you, so that's what I'm going to do."

Jody shrunk further into herself, hyperaware of how crap she looked. And he looked so good today. It wasn't fair. "I don't want to talk! I've got to study! Please get out! Everyone's going to think we're—"

"Having sex?" he interrupted. "Good! That means they won't come up here and disturb us!"

She blushed, mortified. It wasn't like him to talk so... brazenly... especially about relationship stuff. Hell, 'sex' was a word they hadn't said to each other since the time they used to giggle together about sex-ed classes, not even when everyone had thought she was pregnant with his kid. Inadvertently, she was reminded of the scene she'd walked in on two months ago in the gymnasium toilets. Unfortunately, she also recalled what'd happened right after, and her vision became blurry as the image of Amabel's tear-streaked face swam in front of her eyes.

"Jody? Oh shit! I didn't mean to make you upset. I'm sure they don't ac—"

"No, no, it's not that!" she choked, hastily wiping at her eyes. She hadn't even realised she was crying until he'd started panicking. It was embarrassing; shedding tears in front of him made her feel like a small child, not his girlfriend.

"Well, what's wrong then?" he asked, and she felt the mattress dip next to her. "Are you worried about exams? Luke? The baby?"

"Yeah, I am, but it's something else... I found out today that Amabel died last night. She killed herself."

"What?! Why?"

"Her parents found out she wasn't on the team and got really angry. I told you about all the pressure they put on her, right?" He nodded. "I guess she couldn't take it anymore."

He shifted closer to her, taking hold of one of her hands. "Oh, I'm so sorry, Jodes. I know she turned out to not be your sister but you two became friends in the end, didn't you?"

Sniffing, she vehemently shook her head. "Don't say that! I wasn't her friend. A friend would've helped her... I just let her die."

"How did she want you to help her? Tell Mike and May-Li?"

"She didn't want me to help at all. She actually told me to stay out of it, out of her business. She didn't want the social knocking on her door."

"It's not your fault then. Why are you beating yourself up about it?"

She brought her eyes up to meet his. "It is my fault. I shouldn't have listened to her. She was just a kid; she didn't know any better. But I did. She told me that her parents would never speak to her again if they found out she didn't make the team. That's probably exactly what they did, and it's probably what pushed her over the edge. I could've stopped this."

"Hold on," he said, turning towards her a little more. "If her parents are this bad, how do you know it wasn't one or both of them who killed her? Why are you so sure that she killed herself?"

To be honest, the possibility had crossed her mind, but she'd quickly dismissed it. The worst Amabel's parents would've done to her for not making the team was stop her from coming to the gym. She'd still had GCSEs, A levels and uni ahead of her; they would've needed her alive for bragging rights if nothing else.

"That's not the point, Tyler."

"Then what is?"

"I could've gone up to Mike or May-Li, or even Shona, and raised the alarm at any time but I didn't. And not because Amabel told me not to. It's because I didn't care. I was only interested in helping her when I thought she was my sister; after I realised she wasn't, I couldn't be bothered anymore. I'm just selfish." Tyler whistled. Jody gave him an irritated look, despite the serious expression on his face; he wasn't making light of the situation, surely, but what was he trying to get at? "What?"

He blew out his cheeks, before saying, "I just think you're being way too hard on yourself. You're not selfish. You help people out when they ask for it—you always have done—and you did your best for Amabel, too. You respected her wishes. I mean, if she really didn't want the social getting involved, you do realise she could've ended up doing what she did even if you had raised the alarm?"

She released a shaky breath, pulling her hand out of his grip, and pretended not to notice the hurt look on his face as she turned away from him. "You don't get it. I'm a bad person, Tyler, just like my mum and my maybe-dad. When the only decent person in my family admitted that he was gonna be a dad, I wasn't happy for him. Far from it. I was actually upset that there probably wasn't going to be a miscarriage. Yeah. I basically wished death on my own brother's child just because I don't like his or her mum." She sighed. "I'm always gonna be a Jackson... Even if I am a Gray, it doesn't mean shit; it just makes me the daughter of two cheaters instead of one."

"We're not our parents, Jody. We're our own people."

"That's easy to say when your dad could be any randomer on the street because your own mum doesn't even know who he is!"

An awkward silence followed as Jody both processed what she'd said and tried to figure out how to take it back. She soon realised she couldn't, though, because she hadn't said something that was incorrect so much as something that no civilised person would ever say out loud.

A/N: Thanks for the speedy reviews!