Phoebe Grey's Life: College Edition

by Greyfamily6179

Hi you guys! This is the second part of my story Phoebe Grey's Life. You will have to read Phoebe Grey's Life to understand this part. Thank you all for your support! *COMPLETE*

4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

(Y'all I am so sorry it has been so long. To be honest, I wrote this entire story before my vacation two weeks ago and it got deleted. I didn't have any time to write on vacation, so I had to redo the entire thing when I got back. I am so sorry! I did not leave you all in the dust and plan on finishing this story! Leave some reviews!)

JANUARY

It's new year's eve and I just finished getting ready. This year the theme of the party is just black tie. I just put my dress on and I am heading downstairs. This year the Cruz kids are coming and Nathan's family and Caroline and Teddy. A lot of my friends will be there I'm so excited.

"Hey baby," my mom says. She looks absolutely stunning. She is in a long sleeve beige sparkly gown. She has her hair in an updo.

"You look so beautiful," I say in awe of her.

"So do you sweet girl," she says and runs her fingers over my dress to smooth it. My dress is a deep red dress. It is tight and has an open back. It is more mature than what my dad would like I'm sure, but I'm nineteen.

My dad and Nathan walk into the room and both their eyes pop out when they look at me and my mom. I smile and look down as Nathan comes over and kisses my head.

"Hi Bee, you look good enough to eat," he says making me blush and whispering the last part.

"Hi," I say weakly.

"You ready for tonight?" He asks and I nod. He looks ravishing in his black tux.

"I am, the Cruz kids should be here any second they are coming early," I say. Drew is about to turn two. It is insane. He is the cutest almost two year old. It seems like just yesterday I was changing his newborn diapers.

"Bubs, come here," my dad says. I smile to Nathan and walk over.

"Get with your mom I want some pictures of the two of you," he says and I smile. I stand with my mom and he takes pictures on his phone. It's so funny watching him do it.

"Okay now you two," my mom says. My dad wraps an arm around me and I smile.

When Teddy and Caroline come downstairs I am blown away by how beautiful she looks. She is in a deep blue off the shoulder dress. Her hair is in long curls like mine.

After Ted comes down we take a bunch more pictures together. I get some with Nathan that I end up posting on my Instagram. Maisy is the first to comment "damn girl" of course.

After lots of pictures, we head out to the tent. Guests are starting to arrive. I am talking with Mr. Grate a man who works for my mom with Nathan when I feel someone pull on my dress. I look down to see none the other but Spencer Cruz. I haven't seen them in a couple of days because of Christmas so she is all smiles.

"Hi Spence, you look so pretty," I say. She is in a grey dress that has a sparkly top and a tool skirt.

"Bee Bee I need to tell you something," she says. I smile to Mr. Grate.

"It was great talking to the two of you, good luck in school," he says and shakes both of our hands.

"What's up Spence?" I ask her. She motions her hand to come here and I know she wants us to bend down to her level. Unfortunately this dress does not let me do this.

"Spence, I can't bend down girlfriend," I say and she frowns. Nathan touches my back and bends down for me.

"What's up?" He asks her.

"Mommy, says I need to weave Natin and Bee Bee awone tonight because it's their night too," she says and pouts. I look to Nathan and smile. I'm sure Mr. And Mrs. Cruz had a talk with them that we aren't here to play with them.

"You don't have to leave us alone, Spence. Sometimes Nathan and I will have to talk to the adults though," I say and she nods.

"Okay, da boys are playing with Nolan and Elijah and William," I say and I know that's my cousins friends. They are probably in the kid section of the tent. Spencer is a little shy for that.

"Oh really, that's fun, well can we get you something to drink?" Nathan asks.

"Mmmm do they haves chocolate milk?" She asks.

"I don't think so tonight, Bud," Nathan says and I smile.

"Okays orange drink," she says and I know that's fruit punch to her.

I get her a fruit punch and we sit down at a table. Ava and Tyler come over and give us both hugs. Ava looks amazing in her sparkly gown. It is a neutral tone and very sparkly, very Ava.

"Ava, Tyler, this is Spencer Cruz," I say. "Spencer this is my cousin and her friend, Tyler," I say and she puts down her fruit punch staring at them. Ava has never been one to like kids so she smiles at Spencer.

"Hi, my names Spenca Cwuz," she says and I can see Ava and Tyler melt. "I like yous dwess," Spence says to Ava.

"Thank you, I love your dress too. You look so cute," she says to Spencer.

"Thanks you, my mommy picked out dis dwess it for me," she says and takes her fruit punch in both hands taking a sip.

"So when do you guys go back?" Ava asks as I brush Spencer's hair out of her face.

"Next Wednesday," I say.

"Next Friday," Nathan says.

"We both go back Thursday," Ava says and we nod.

"So I heard that you are going to Princeton for your birthday," Ava says and I nod smiling looking to Nathan. That was a surprise from my parents.

"I am, he has a game on my birthday so I am going to watch then we are going to dinner," I say and Nathan nods. Spencer is being so good just sitting here.

"That is so fun. When are you letting me come to Michigan?" Ava asks.

"You still haven't been?" Nathan asks. Tyler eyes Nathan as Ava eyes Tyler.

"There hasn't been a good time. You can come whenever," Tyler says and I roll my eyes.

"Well how fuc- flipping generous of you," I eyed her as she almost swears in front of Spencer.

"Careful little ears," I say and she flips me off behind Spencer's head. I laugh and look down at Spencer.

"There they are," I hear my Aunt Mia's voice.

"Aunt Mia," I smile giving her a hug. I haven't seen her since I got back. They were with Ethan's family for Christmas.

"Hi sweet girl," she says hugging me and Ava. She greets Tyler and Nathan and says hi to Spencer.

"My son is playing with your brothers," she tells Spencer.

"They're nuts," Spencer says and makes all of us laugh.

"How are you guys, how is school?" Mia asks.

"It's great, California is a dream," Ava says and I nod.

"It's amazing, much more challenging this year, but it's great," I say and she smiles.

"That's awesome girls. I am so proud. We have to get dinner before you guys go," she says and we nod.

"Of course," I say. She gets called off and we all stand up.

"Tyler and I are going to get drinks, and to talk to his family. Save us a seat at dinner," Ava says and we nod.

"There she is, Spencer you can't walk away from mommy and daddy like that," I hear Mrs. Cruz voice.

"I was with Bee Bee and Natin," Spencer says and Mrs. Cruz shakes her head.

"You can't leave the kids area, we talked about this Bee isn't watching you tonight," Mrs. Cruz says and Spencer frowns.

"But she said I cans," mrs. Cruz looks at her. I tell Mrs. Cruz she can sit with us during the fireworks.

"Spencer, dinner is starting soon, you can sit with Bee Bee during the fireworks," mrs. Cruz says. She pouts and tells us she'll see us later.

Nathan laughs and puts his hand on my back. We see his parents and Berkeley and walk over. "Phoebe, you look stunning," Mrs. Moore says.

"Oh thank you so much, so do you," I say.

"Hi Berk," I smile hugging her.

"You look gorgeous," she says. She does too, she is in an emerald gown long dress. It's beautiful.

"Thank you, so do you," I say and she smiles.

We talk to Nathan's family for awhile and then dinner is called. Nathan and I sit with my family. We are across from Ava and Tyler. I am next to Teddy.

"Everyone looks great tonight," my mom says and I smile.

"Phoebe, red is your color," my grandma says.

"Oh thank you so much," I say and she smiles.

"This is amazing," I smile as I eat the French onion soup. It is so good.

"Here try mine," Nathan says and I about die on the spot.

"Amazing," I say and he smiles.

Our main course consists of steak, Caesar salad, and potatoes au gratin. I eat almost everything on my plate and I catch my dad eyeing me and he winks when he sees my plate.

After dinner Nathan takes my hand. "So do I get a dance tonight?" Nathan asks.

"Of course you do," I say and he presses me up against him. His hand finds the small of my back and we start to dance. He moves us across the floor. He knows how to move. My dad used to dance with me all the time. He is the one who taught me.

"You look stunning tonight," he says and I smile.

"Thank you, so do you," I say and he laughs.

He twirls me around and I laugh. The band is playing witchcraft by Frank Sinatra. Nathan hums quietly in my ear as we dance. Soon my feet start to hurt and we leave the dance floor. We sit and look out.

"The fireworks should be starting soon," I say.

"Should we get Spencer Cruz?" Nathan asks.

"We did make a promise," I say.

"And a promise we shall keep," he says and I smile. He takes my hand and we head over to the kids section. They have a mini dance floor and a bunch of activities. My family really does go all out.

"There she is," Nathan points to a little table. She is sitting with a cotton candy. I laugh as she eats it and bops her head to the music. Such a ham.

"Can we sit?" I ask her.

"There you are," She says and I laugh.

"How is the cotton candy?" I ask her.

"Yummy," She says.

"Are you tired?" I ask her.

"Mmm no," she says.

"Really?" Nathan asks as she yawns and she shrugs.

"Maybe," She says. She comes over and sits on Nathan's lap.

"The fireworks are starting soon should we go sit?" I ask her. she nods smiling we head to the viewing area and sit on a provided blanket.

Spencer sits in between Nathan's legs resting back. I smile and lean my head on his shoulder. We wrap a blanket on Spencer and watch as the countdown begins.

"5...4...3...2...1, HAPPY NEW YEAR," I lean in kissing Nathan and he puts his hand on my cheek. The fireworks begin and we look down at Spencer and she is asleep.

"I love you," Nathan says.

"I love you more," I say and we kiss again. It's going to be a happy new year.

—-

Today is my mock party and we'll I've been kicked out of my apartment. The girls are decorating and scheming apparently. I'm supposed to go to Kendra's to get ready she has my outfit which scares me and all my makeup.

I am walking in her building. She lives in a flat type of thing. It's just her in the room but there are a bunch of people in the hall. I walk onto her floor and knock.

"Pheebs," she smiles and welcomes me in. It is so cute in here. She decorated it so well.

"Hey girl," I say.

"Are you ready to get glammed up," she asks. She insists on doing everything. I'm fine with it.

"I think so," I say and she laughs.

"Sit down in the chair," she says motioning to her vanity desk chair. It is fluffy and white.

"Your wish is my command," I say and she laughs.

"So where are you headed next week?" She asks.

"New Jersey. I am staying at Nathan's and watching him play," I say and she smiles as she primes my face.

"That's so fun, I am jealous," she says.

"How are things with Brady?" I ask her.

"They are going. It is so hard with him being so far," she says and I smile.

"It's tough, but so worth it," I say. Brady goes to Cornell University.

"It's starting to feel less and less worth it," she says.

"Why do you say that?" I ask as she does my foundation.

"I don't know, every time we talk we fight and get more and more distant," she says.

"How was break?" I ask her.

"With him, amazing. We have never been closer it's just when we are far we bicker and the distance gets the best of us," she says.

"It's so hard and anyone who says it's not is lying. At the end of the day, you guys just have to decide if it is worth staying together or are you better apart," I say and she nods.

"I think we have different views on that," she says and I smile sadly.

"You need to do what makes you the happiest," I say and she nods.

"I know, it's just hard because I care about him sometimes more than my own happiness," she says.

"I've been there, and you're right it is so hard," I say.

"Close your eyes," she says and I smile doing as she says. I feel her doing my eyeshadow. I never wear eyeshadow because I am so bad at it.

"Okay open, now close," she says and I smile.

"Thank you for doing this," I say.

"You deserve it, Grey," she smiles sweetly.

After she does my makeup, she starts my hair. She straightens it and I realize just how long it is. I need a haircut. Nathan would laugh if he heard me say that.

Finally, it's time for my outfit. She hands it to me and I inspect it. "Just go put it on," she says and I laugh.

I go into the bathroom and see it's a two piece set. It's all black and very sleek. Where did she get this from? Hopefully, I get to keep it. I slip it on and it is so cute. It is a crop top and very cute pants that go together.

I walk out and she claps. "You are so hot holy shit," she says and I shake my head.

"Okay these shoes," she hands me very cute booties. If I get drunk enough I know I'll break an ankle.

"You look perfect and we are done just in time. Let's head over to the apartment," she says. I see it is 9 pm and I smile.

We head out and Kendra drives us over. When we get there we head upstairs. I hear loud music and am sure that our neighbors are going to love this.

I walk in and everyone yells and circles around me. I love these people so much. I smile at how amazing they are. Andrew comes up and wraps an arm around me and kisses my head.

"Happy early birthday kid," he says and I smile. I thank him.

I get a birthday cup full of lord knows what, but I start drinking anyway. It is sweet and very strong. Maisy and Olivia come up to me and I hug them both. "You guys didn't have to do this," I say and they laugh.

"Of course we did, Grey. It's your 20th," they say and I shake my head in disbelief.

"Thank you guys really," I say and they smile.

"We wouldn't miss celebrating you for the world," Olivia says and I smile. I have the best Friends.

The drinks are being poured by Maisy which means everyone is hammered in about 2 seconds. I am on my fourth vodka lemonade and it is hitting me. There is loud music and lots of dancing.

"Phoebe, happy birthday," I hear and I turn to see Ryan. He is a senior and here and is so nice. He and Andrew are friends.

"Oh my gosh, thank you," I say.

"So actually, I have a question," he says and I nod.

"What's up?" I ask.

"Your friend Olivia, is she single?" He asks. I smile and shake my head no.

"No she is dating TJ," I say and he frowns.

"Shit she is a total babe, well I'm not about to fuck with TJ," he says and I laugh. TJ is scary when he's angry.

"Grey, I have a surprise for you," I hear Caroline's voice. I'm so drunk I think it's Caroline. I stumble and turn.

"What is it?" I ask her laughing. She grabs my hand and takes me to my room. I know it's not Nathan that happened last year.

"Go in there," she says and I smile. I walk in and my blonde best friend is dressed in a shirt red romper.

"AVA," I yell and run and tackle her.

"Grey good god," she laughs. "Happy 20th birthday party," she says and I smile.

"How did you get here?" I ask her.

"With the help of your brother and his girlfriend," she says and I smile.

"I'm sorry I'm so drunk," I say feeling bad. She smirks and pulls a flask out. She sucks the flask down.

"I won't be far behind you now let's go party," she says.

We go out and start dancing to the music. We both get another Maisy drink. "I'm so happy you're here," I yelled in her ear.

"I'm so happy I am too," she yells back.

"Are we going to bars tonight?" She asks.

"Oh hell yeah," I say and she laughs pulling out her fake. I will need to grab mine.

Andrew comes over and hugs Ava. We all start talking before I walk over to Caroline. She is talking to our Sorority sister. She hugs me tightly.

"Are you excited for New Jersey?" She asks me.

"Yeah I am," I smile.

"Lots of sex huh?" She asks and I blush shaking my head.

"I know that look, be safe missy," she says and I laugh.

I talk to Caroline for a bit longer until the lights are turned out and I see the glow of the candles. Everyone starts singing happy birthday as a cake comes out. Holy crap.

I smile and when they finish blow out the candles. I wish for something special and hope it comes true. After we cut the cake and all the drunk people enjoy it.

I smile and enjoy the rest of my night that ends in a lot of drinking and fun. So much fun. I love all these people.

—

I am on my way to New Jersey. I am on my families jet this time. No making friends on a public plane. I really did enjoy meeting Priscilla last time thought.

Sawyer is with me and is reading his book. My birthday is tomorrow and I am quite excited about it. I can't believe I am going to be 20. Next year I'll be able to legally drink. So crazy.

We fly through the nighttime. We should be at Princeton around midnight. I told Nathan not to wait up for me and I'll lock up, and he told me I was crazy. I get it. I would want to see him.

I do some homework as we fly. I have an essay due, so I am working on it now. It is so interesting what I am learning about child development. I think only I would say that.

"We should be landing shortly," I head over the speaker. I close my laptop and stare out the window at the pitch black sky.

I grip the seat as we land and watch us roll in. I get into the car Sawyer rented. I lean against the seat and drift off.

"Phoebe," I get shaken awake. Holy crap I was out for that entire time. I guess I haven't been sleeping well. I've had a lot of work and a little time to do it.

"Holy crap, I slept that entire time," I say and Sawyer tells me I need to get sleep. I kind of lied to my parents and told them that I was sleeping at Olivia's friend who goes here's dorm when really I'm just going to stay with Nathan.

I take my bag and head upstairs. I open the door and there stands my very sexy man. He is in his pjs and is standing looking beautiful as ever. I run into his arms.

"Hi my girl," he says and I blush.

"I missed you," I say as I inhale his scent.

"I missed you more," he says. "You look so good," and I know he is just being nice. I feel disgusting.

"I look disgusting," I smile and look up at him.

"Not even close. You are stunning," he says and I shake my head. I rest my head on his chest as we hug again.

"Are you tired?" He asks brushing the hair out of my face. I nod and look up at him.

"Let's get you to bed then," I feel bad I hope he wasn't thinking we were going to have sex. I am so tired.

When I change into his T-shirt he is laying in his bed watching me. I feel bad he stayed up late and probably wanted sex. Shit. I crawl into bed and he wraps an arm around me.

I start kissing him and it turns deeper. We make out for a bit and then I reach to find the hem of his shirt. As I pull it up he grabs my hand stopping me. "Bee, you are exhausted. We have plenty of time for that. Get some sleep," he says and I smile.

"I felt bad, you stayed up late for me and well I thought I had to reciprocate," I say. Nathan frowns and turns towards me.

"You never have to feel bad about not wanting to have sex. Your body is your body and you need to listen to it," he says and I nod. He is so respectful towards me it blows my mind.

"How are you my boyfriend?" I ask him and brush my fingers against his cheek.

"I could ask you the same thing," he says.

"I would tell you I'm not your boyfriend if you said that," he laughs and starts tickling my ribs.

"Okay okay I'm sorry," I say laughing.

"Go to bed, we both have big days tomorrow," he says and I smile.

I lay on my side with Nathan behind me. He has his arm protectively wrapped around me. I end up falling asleep quickly in his arms.

I wake up and hear Nathan still breathing softly behind me. I check his clock and see it is 10. We went to bed around 1 so it makes sense. I am was so tired and feel great now. I have a pressing need to pee though.

Nathan's hand is wrapped around me still. Slyly I try to slide out. His grip tightens on me. I look back and he's still asleep. Protective even in his sleep. I take a deep breath and try again.

"Where are you going?" I hear Nathan's morning voice which I may add is so hot.

"I have to pee," I laugh. He lifts his arm up and I walk out of the room. As I'm walking to the bathroom in the kitchen there is a topless girl and Nathan's roommate making out in the kitchen. They don't see me so I run back to Nathan's room.

"Nathan," I poke him awake.

"Hmm?" He asks still sleeping.

"Nathan," I keep poking him. He sits up on his forearms and his biceps flex. Whew.

"Yes?" He asks rubbing his face awake.

"There's a naked girl in your kitchen," I say and Nathan looks confused.

"What?" He says.

"There is a naked girl making out with Zach in your kitchen," I say again.

"Jesus," he says and starts to get up to go out there. He slides on his pj pants and leaves his shirt off.

"Wait," I grab his arm.

"What?" He asks.

"She's naked I don't want you seeing her," I say. He looks at me and sighs.

"I am kicking them out. Not looking at her," he says and I frown motioning my hand for him to go do it.

"What the fuck, Zach?" He says. The girl covers her chest and grabs her dress slipping it on. Well what little of a dress there is.

"What man? Not like you haven't seen boobs before," he says and I stifle a laugh.

"I told you Phoebe was coming and to not do this shit," Nathan says. I can tell he isn't mad he's just frustrated.

"You said she was coming Thursday," he says.

"It's Friday," Nathan says and his roommates face drops.

"Fuck sorry man, I was just busy last night with Kayla," he says. The girls gasps and we all look at her.

"Are you fucking kidding, my name is Katelyn," she says and grabs her purse and shoes and storms out. Before she does she looks at him and says "you weren't even good in bed," Nathan starts dying laughing.

"What a bitch," he says.

"Dude you forgot her name and slept with her," I say.

"Phoebe's right, dick move," Nathan joins in laughing.

"Whatever, sorry you had to see that I'm Zach," he sticks out his hand and I'm reluctant to shake it because I just saw where it was.

"Oh sorry," he says going to the sink to wash his hands.

"Hi Zach I'm Phoebe," I say and we shake hands.

"We are going to the shack for breakfast," Nathan says.

"Okay I have class today, nice meeting you Phoebe," he says and grabs his backpack off the counter walking out.

"He didn't even change," I say.

"Welcome to Zach's world," Nathan says and I laugh. He looks so good in just his pj pants. He looks older and I can't put my finger on why.

"I have to change before we go," I say. I head back into his room and he follows. I slip off my shirt and put on jeans and a long sleeve. It's pretty chilly today.

"You look stunning," Nathan says coming up behind me and kissing my neck.

"Now I know you're lying," I say and he shakes his head.

"Let's go," he says and takes my hand.

We head out. He takes me to the shack. We sit down at a window table. We both get coffee and water.

"What's good here?" I ask him.

"Everything. But the crepes are really good," he says. I'll take his word for it. He gets the strawberry Nutella crepes and I get the bananas foster crepes.

"I miss you," I say and rub my nail over his finger.

"I've missed you too. I'm excited for you to get to watch me play," he says and I smile.

"Me too, do you guys have a game over spring break?" I ask him. Last year we met up over spring break.

"We do but it is in Texas," he says and I frown. Poor timing.

"Damnit," I say.

"Do you know what you guys are doing yet?" He asks.

"Olivia said something about going to her house in Florida," I say and Nathan nods.

"That'd be fun, you could say hi to all my old friends for me," he says and it's a sad smile on his face.

"What?" I ask. He shakes his head and I frown.

"What is wrong. Something is obviously bothering you," I say and he shakes his head.

"Nathan," I say.

"I don't want you going to Florida without me there," he says and I raise my eyebrows. The waiter interrupts us by putting down plates. Once he walks away I look to Nathan.

"Why would you say that," I ask him.

"Last time we were there you know what happened, this time I won't be there to prevent it," he says and I frown.

"Nothing is going to happen to me," I say.

"Just worries me, you are the sweetest thing in my life," he says and I smile.

"We don't even know what we're doing yet," I say and he nods.

We finish and head home for the rest of the day we hang out. Have lots of sex and then hand out some more. It is not very productive.

Finally, Nathan has to leave for his game. I'm going after he leaves. I have courtside seats. It's just me going.

"See you soon," he kisses me goodbye.

"Bye hottie," I say squeezing his butt. He laughs and walks out.

After he heads out I leave an hour after. I go wearing one of his Princeton shirts tied in the front with ripped jeans. I go and sit.

Watching Nathan play is one of my favorite things. I take pictures and send them to my parents. He is playing amazing tonight. He rubs by me and winks.

He looks so sexy on the court. When half time rolls around I sit on my phone. There are two girls behind me talking and I hear Nathan's name pop up.

"He's just so hot," I hear the one girl say.

"I'd let him do anything to me, and he posts the cutest things with his girlfriend," I smile at the second part. They know he's taken.

"Really let me see," she says.

"Omg the caption, usually I wear my heart on my sleeve but this time it's on my back," I know the picture they are talking about. It's when Nathan and I went on a hike and he carried me on his back over the mud and my dad got a picture.

"I mean that is so cute, but he isn't loyal to her," my heart sinks and I listen closer. It's just two girls gossiping.

"What do you mean?" The one girl asks. I'm holding back tears.

"I heard he made out and felt up Brooke Zellers at the bar on fifth," she says.

"No way, I doubt that," please not be true I think to myself.

"I don't know apparently there is some video going around," my heart is torn out of my chest. The game starts again and I sit there barely able to figure out what just happened.

After the game, I am heart broken. I can't stop thinking about what those girls said or that video. My birthday is tomorrow and all I want to do is go home.

"Hey baby," Nathan says and comes up to me.

"Good job," I say and dodge his kiss when he tries to come forward.

"What's going on?" He asks.

"I don't want to talk about it here," I say and he frowns.

"Is everything okay?" He asks on the way home. I don't respond and stare out the window.

When we get inside his apartment, he shuts the door and puts his bag down. "What is going on?" He asks.

"Did you make out with a Brooke Zeller at a bar?" I say.

"What are you talking about? How do you even know who Brooke Zellers is?" He asks. Why is that his only question.

"Answer my question, did you make out with her?" I ask him.

"No what? Why would you even think that?" He asks.

"Because I heard two girls talking behind me and they said there is a video of you making out with another girl," I say and tears stream down my face.

"And you believe them over your boyfriend of 3 years? Phoebe I don't know what I have to do to make you trust me. I swear I am constantly trying to prove myself to you," He starts to raise his voice.

"If you heard guys say that about me then I'm sure you would freak," I say.

"Yeah I would but not on you. On them for saying that about my girl, you want the video of Brooke? Here, I'm taking a shower," he throws his phone down after typing in something. He slams the door to his bathroom and I start crying.

I grab his phone and low and behold it's a video of a beautiful blonde making out with a brunette kid that could look like Nathan if you squint. Or maybe it does and I just know him too well.

Fuck, what did I just do?

—-

I am sitting on the couch in his apartment staring at my hands. I didn't mean to doubt him. I am seriously feeling bad. I hear the shower turn off and I go into his room. I sit on his bed and he comes out.

He walks out and has a towel wrapped around his waist. He ignores me and I sigh. "Nathan, can we talk," I say.

"Phoebe, I've done nothing to make you doubt me. But over and over again you continue to make me the bad guy" he says.

"I'm sorry, Nathan I am," I say.

"I get that, but you have no idea what it is like to be constantly accused of stupid shit. I would never make out with another girl," he raises his voice and puts on his pj pants and boxers.

"It's just hard to ignore it when girls behind me say there's a video of you making out with this girl," I try to defend my stupid actions.

"Phoebe, you've never met those girls. They could have not even known me," he says. "You constantly buy into this shit. I am so loyal to you, Phoebe. You don't even understand it," he yells and I wipe my face off with my hands.

"This is a cycle that just repeats and repeats," he is really getting going now. "You hear some bullshit rumor that people love to talk about and you believe it," his voice is raised. "If I did that to you, you would freak. It's exhausting being contestant fucking doubted," he yells. I am a mess now.

"Are you even going to say anything?" He asks. This is bad.

"I'm just scared okay? I'm scared I'm not enough for you. You are so attractive, you are so kind, you play basketball for one of the most prestigious universities in the US, and you are smart. Genius smart. You are a complete catch and no one could deny it. You have fan pages on Instagram. I am just Phoebe. I'm not anything special and the girls around here are so beautiful. I'm sorry I doubt you. It's just so hard to force myself to believe that I am enough," I say. He is looking at me like I have three heads. He walks over to me and cups my cheeks.

"Don't you ever talk about yourself that way again. You are everything I need. Enough doesn't even measure up to what you are," he says and tears stream down my face.

"I'm sorry" I say and he sighs.

"I just need you to believe me. There is not a soul in this world that would make me cheat on you. You are enough. More than enough," he says.

"I'm sorry Nathan. I really am I fucked up," I say and he shakes his head.

"I lost my cool, I shouldn't have done that," he says and I wrap an arm around him.

"You are always way too patient with me," I say and he laughs.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you more, Phoebe," he says.

"It's 12:03," he says. I look to the clock.

"You don't miss much do you?" I say and he laughs shaking his head.

"No sassy pants I don't and it is your birthday," he says and I realize I am 20. Holy crap.

"It is," I say.

He smiles and starts to kiss me. He lays me back on my back and pulls away. "Happy birthday," he says as his hand creeps up my shirt.

"Mmm thank you," I say as we continue kissing. The other reason we are meant to be together is because how mercurial we both are. One minute we are fighting the next. Well.

After we have our way with each other Nathan gets off of me and lays next to me. "Happy birthday, baby," he says. I smile and rest my head on his chest.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you too," he says and I smile.

"Now get some sleep, we have a big day tomorrow," He says and I smile. This boy. My love.

FEBRUARY

My dad is coming up and meeting me today! He has a meeting at WSU for his internship program that is launching this year. His meeting ends at 11 and we are going to Soup Spoon. I am so excited to see him. It'll be so good to get to see someone from home. Especially him.

I am cleaning up the apartment now. It has been kind of a mess recently. I do not want it to be a mess when my dad comes by. So far, I have wiped the counters down, vacuumed and reassembled the living room.

I get changed into jeans and a sweater and wait for my dad. Finally, I hear a knock on the door. I rush over to answer it.

"Hey Bubs," he says. He is in his black suit looking very sharp.

"You look so nice," I say as I hug him.

"I had my meeting earlier, the apartment looks great," he says as he walks in and looks around.

"I was scrambling to clean it before you came," I laugh.

"Oh you didn't have to do that, besides I did raise Teddy as a son," he says and we both laugh. Let's just say Ted isn't the most organized.

"Are you hungry?" I ask him. He walks over to my kitchen and I realize I forgot to put away the alcohol. Shit.

"I am hungry," he says and lifts up a bottle of vodka.

"Really?" He asks. I bite my lip and shrug.

"I hope you are being safe and smart," he says.

"Always," I say. He opens up the fridge and I think he has a stroke. We haven't eaten at home in probably weeks. All that's in the fridge is left over pizza, beer, some white claws, and fruit.

"Oh my gosh, Phoebe. Where is your food?" He asks.

"We have been doing a lot of ordering food and snacking," I say.

"I'm having Sawyer stock the fridge, this is unacceptable," he says and I frown.

"It's fine, I'll go to the grocery store," I try to reason with him.

"No, while we are at lunch he is going," my dad says and I sigh. There is no fighting Christian Grey on food related issues.

"Sounds good, you ready to go eat?" I ask him.

"Of course," he says and we walk out. After I give him a big hug, Taylor drives us to soup spoon. We get out and go inside and get seated.

"So how was your meeting?" I ask him.

"It went very well. The program is launching and being announced next month after spring break," he says and I nod.

"So when do the interns start working?" I ask him.

"The students who are eligible and want to apply will do so at the end of March. Then we pick our four applicants and they start interning May 30th. It goes all throughout the summer and they are rotating to different jobs and parts of the company," he says and I nod.

"Wow that sounds super cool," I say.

"Well hopefully it helps the students," he says and I smile. We order our food and the waitress takes our menus.

"How was New Jersey for your birthday?" He asks.

"It was so good to see Nathan. I missed him a lot. They won their game too which was good," I say and he smiles.

"That is good to hear, your mother said that you mentioned spring break plans to her, what are they?" My dad asks.

"We are going to Olivia's house in florida," I say and he frowns. Oh no.

"I would rather you go to our house in California again," he says.

"Dad, Olivia was very excited to go home. She never gets to go visit home, it's like Teddy," I say and he doesn't look convinced.

"Phoebe, last time you were there you got drugged. I do not feel comfortable letting you go to that same place again," I shake my head.

"Dad that kid won't be there. And besides we all already have made plans to go," I say.

"Phoebe, I love you, but I really do not want you going," he says. The waiter brings out our food.

"Dad, all my friends are going and I only have so many spring breaks left," I say and he frowns.

"Phoebe, your safety is more important than you having a good time to me," He says and I shake my head.

"Dad, Nothing is going to happen like that again. That kid won't be there and I learned my lesson," I say.

"We'll talk about this later," he says and I take a bite of my soup. Jokes on him I already bought my plane ticket.

We finish up lunch and head back to my apartment. I walk in to find Olivia and Maisy stoking our fridge. Sawyer bought a lot of food.

"Look at you two," I say and they laugh.

"Hi Mr. Grey," Olivia says.

"Oh hi Mr. Grey," Maisy says after.

"Maisy, Olivia, how are you girls?" He asks.

"Great, thank you so much for getting us this food," Olivia says.

"Well I do not know how much food you can make out of cheap vodka and beer, leftover pizza, and fruit," he says and we all laugh.

"Thank you so much," Maisy says.

"Not a problem girls, how are your studies going?" He asks them.

"They are going well, it's getting more difficult as the years go on," Olivia says.

"Agreed," Maisy says.

"Well the best thing to do is to keep studying," my dad says and we all nod.

My dad and I end up spending the rest of the day together. I decide not to bring up spring break again until we are on the plane to Florida. Hopefully my dad just forgets and we can just go in peace.

—

It is Valentine's Day and I am going to Galetine's day at the sorority house. I have my little now that recruitment and rush is over. Unfortunately, it happened in the fall and I was with my grandpa majority of the time in the hospital.

The girls were so understanding and so sweet about it. My littles name is Harper, she is the sweetest southern bell from Tennessee. She is studying to become a nurse.

Maisy and I walk into the sorority house together and already the place is crazy. There is wine, champagne, and vodka for us. Also the best pizza place catered pizza, subs, and salads. Every girls dream.

We are watching romcoms and drinking. Every big and little get to sit together. We also have matching pjs. Super cheesy but cute.

"Okay girls, grab food and a drink first movie up is Crazy Stupid Love," our sorority president yells.

I sit down and wait for Harper. I give her a hug after she sets her stuff down. "Oh my gosh, I can't believe y'all put this on," she says and I smile.

"Isn't it fun? Last year we went to a party, but this year we wanted to just relax and chill," I say. She smiles and takes a sip of her drink.

"I've never seen this movie before," she says.

"Oh my gosh, it is amazing," I say. The movie starts and everyone is eating and drinking. It is so much fun.

We all get through the movie with minimal talking and many laughs. As the movie ends I look over at Harper and she is smiling. "I can't believe I've never seen that. Ryan Gosling is so hot," she says and I laugh.

"That he is, do you want another drink?" I ask her and she nods. I get her some more wine.

"Oh thank you, Pheebs, how is Nathan?" She asks me.

"Great, I actually just got back from Princeton two days ago," I say and she smiles.

"Oh no way. How was it?" She asks.

"It was good, it was really good to see Nate and watch him play again," I say and she smiles.

"How long have y'all been together?" She asks.

"4 years this November," I say and she shakes her head.

"That is crazy, if y'all last through college you'll have what 6 years under your belt?" She says and I am blown away by that comment. I didn't even think about that.

"Well when you say it like that," I say and she laughs.

"That is crazy, y'all are so cute though. I just followed him on his Instagram. He posts the cutest things of you," she says and I laugh. That is not the first time I have heard that.

"I know he does, I am very lucky," I say.

"That you are," she smiles.

"So what's the boy situation like with you?" I ask her sipping my wine.

"I just broke up with my boyfriend actually. We thought we could last through college and freshman year got the best of us," she says and I frown.

"I'm sorry, Harper. What happened?" I ask.

"Well I went here and he stayed in state and went to the University of Tennessee. He was mad I didn't stay, but he denied it of course. He started becoming skeptical of me and not talking to me for weeks, so I finally broke it off," she says. That would be horrible. On top of your freshman year stress. I would have been in denial.

"I am in awe of you, I would have been a mess," I admit. "I am always here for you, if you ever need anything," I say.

"Thanks Pheebs," She says and hugs me.

"The next movie is 10 things I hate about you," our president, Taylor calls out. I smile and sit back.

"What's this one about?" Harper asks. Is she kidding? My mouth drops open.

"Be prepared to be mind blown," I say. She laughs and looks up at the screen.

The rest of the night is spent drinking, watching, and having a lot of fun. I love these girls so much.

—-

I have not had enough Andrew time this semester. I am going to his apartment right now and am forcing him to hang out with me. I have his favorite pizza with me.

I go up to his apartment door and start banging. Soon he opens the door and I smile. "Hey Grey, what's up?" He asks.

"I miss you," I say and he smiles.

"I miss you too, come inside is that for me?" He motions to the pizza.

"You know it," I say.

"Oh I love you," he says.

I set the pizza down on his counter and sit down on a chair. He gets himself a beer and passes me one too. "So update me, what has been up with you?" He asks.

"Not much, just getting ready for spring break. I am sure Maisy has told you," I say and he looks down awkwardly.

"What?" I ask him.

"You haven't heard? Maisy cheated on me over winter break," he says. My heart drops why did no one tell me.

"Oh my gosh, Andrew I am so sorry. I didn't know. Are you okay?" I ask him.

"I am fine, we are working through it but honestly I don't see us making it through the school year," he says.

"I really am sorry. How did you find out?" I ask him.

"She told me after it happened. She felt really bad, but between you and me, I don't think it was an accident," he says and I nod. She always has had feelings for her ex.

"How are you handling it?" I ask him.

"I am fine, I was hurt when she told me. Now it is just old news. I can't believe you didn't know," he says.

"I don't think Olivia knows," I say. Maisy never told us.

"Oh yes she does, remember that fight they got into before your birthday party? That was about Maisy and me," he says. I do remember them bickering, but I just assumed it was pointless girl drama.

"How is Nathan?" Andrew asks as I take a sip of my beer.

"He is good. I miss him a lot. They are in Boston this week," I tell him.

"That is awesome. I have Princeton going far in my bracket," he says.

"I am sure Nathan will love to hear it," I say. I take a couple more bites of my pizza.

"He was the one that helped me make it," he says.

"I am glad you two are besties now," I say and he shakes his head.

We finish off eating our pizza and end up on the patio drinking a couple of more beers. I forgot how much I missed him. After an hour or so we are both drunk and sitting on the patio watching people walk by.

"What are you guys doing for spring break you never ended up telling me?" He asks.

"Florida, going to Olivia's house. Nathan is nervous about me going, but I have told him over and over I am fine," I say and he laughs.

"Well you know you have to be safe is probably what he meant," he says.

"Oh the bromance continues," I say and he laughs.

"Gosh Grey, I missed you," he says and I laugh.

"I missed you more," I say.

I end up just sleeping at Andrew's apartment on his couch. I was too drunk to come home and he even called Nathan who insisted I sleep over. It was so good catching up with Andrew.

MARCH

We leave for spring break next week. My dad has been trying to get a hold of me and I am too scared to tell him that I am going to Florida whether he likes it or not.

Sawyer has told him I'm fine, and has told me to call him, but I just am scared. I am packing now and am on FaceTime with Nathan.

"Why don't you just tell him you'll be safe and Sawyer will be there, so he doesn't have to worry," he says.

"You've met my dad. That would work with any normal parent, but Christian Grey Hell no," I say and he nods.

"Olivia's parents will be there right," he says.

"Yeah, but I think his problem is they won't be there obviously when we go boating and go out," I say and he frowns.

"What?" I say as I fold all my bathing suits.

"You guys are going on the boat?" He asks and I nod.

"It's some of your guy friends spring break too," I say and he sighs.

"Nathan, come on," I say.

"What?" He asks.

"You know what," I say. "I'm not going to hook up with any of your friends, especially after what happened," I say trying to reassure him.

"I know, I'm just…"

"Over the top protective," I cut him off as he is talking.

"Worried about you," he finishes his sentence.

"You don't need to be, I have Sawyer, and the girls, and Olivia's parents," I say.

"I know but you are my girl, I'm always worried about you," he says and I smile.

"And I love you for that," I say and he smiles.

"I miss you so much," Nathan says shaking his head.

"That makes two of us, when will I see you next?" I ask him.

"Well… summer break right," he says.

"I think so, uh that is so far away," I sigh.

"It'll fly by besides you have spring break next week," he says and I smile.

"I am so ready to get the hell out of here," I say and he smiles.

"I bet, how has class been this week?" He asks.

"Hellish, I'm applying for internships when I get back," I say and he nods.

"Which ones," he asks.

"Well, one is at a children's hospital in Bellevue, and one is at a children's hospital in Seattle, then the other is a children's hospital in Portland," I say and he smiles.

"Wow, I am so proud of you, Bee," he says and I smile.

"Thank you, I'm excited. I really hope I get the one in Seattle," I say.

"If you put your mind to it, I bet you can do it," he says.

"You're too sweet," I smile.

We hang up after talking for a bit longer. I miss that boy so much. I continue to pack and when I am done I head out to my kitchen. I make myself a small salad and get myself a water. I sigh and start reading the chapter of the textbook I need to read for tonight.

Suddenly my phone rings again and it's my mom. I pick it up and hold it against my ear as I read. "Hello?" I ask.

"So you answer your mother and not me," my dads voice comes through the phone. Fuck.

"I've been insanely busy, Dad," I say.

"I saw that you leave for Florida in three days," he says and I sigh.

"Dad, I really just didn't want you telling me that I couldn't go," I say.

"Phoebe, if I wasn't going to allow you to go I would have driven down to school weeks ago and told you," he says and he makes a very fair point sometimes I forget who my dad is.

"Yeah you're right," I say and he sighs.

th

"I just wanted to talk safety with you," he says and I put my salad plate down.

"Okay," I say just allowing it to happen.

"When you guys get there you need to let Sawyer know where you'll be at all times. He has the tracker on your phone and don't do anything because I will fly down to Florida," he starts and I roll my eyes.

"Don't roll your eyes, this is your safety not mine," he says and I swear he has cameras in here.

"No taking drinks from strangers… even if you think you know them. Don't drink and drive, don't let others drink and drive you around. It's better to be safe than sorry call Sawyer if you need anything. No drugs and I mean of any kind I don't care how minor people say they are," he says and I feel like I am in the dare program in fifth grade.

"Lastly, take pictures and send them to your mom and me. We love seeing you having fun," he says.

"Thank you for letting me go," I say.

"You're welcome, please just listen to these rules Phoebe. I am really trying to be cool here," he says and I smile.

"You don't have to try to be cool, you are cool," I say and he laughs.

"I'm sure, have so much fun, and try to keep in touch," he says.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you too, Bubs," he says and I smile.

After we hang up, I get back to my school work. I am trying to cram it all and get it all done before we leave. Maisy comes home drunk as a skunk and lays across the couch.

"Pheebs," she says.

"Yeah?" I ask her.

"I think I want to break up with Andrew," she says and I look down at her. After what andrew told me last week I am starting to wonder if that has something to do with it.

"Why do you say that?" I ask her.

"Because I hooked up with my ex and I am thinking I am starting to like him again," she says and I sigh.

"Maisy, you're drunk as can be right now. It's not a good idea to think about this and try to come to a decision," I say.

"This is the reason I'm drunk," she says and I frown.

"Have you talked to andrew?" I ask her.

"No," she says.

"Then that should be your first step," I say and she smiles.

"You're the best, but I need to go puke now," she says and runs into the bathroom. I shake my head as I get back to studying.

I really hope they don't break up, but if they think it is what is best then they probably should.

—

It's Florida day! I am making coffee in the kitchen while Maisy and Liv rush around doing last minute things. I get them each a to go cup and grab my suitcase.

"Guys come on time to go," I say trying to get them to hurry up.

"Okay I'm ready," Liv says. She grabs her coffee mug and Maisy rushes in after her. We all get our mugs and walk out.

Sawyer is taking us to the airport. We're all exhausted and hungover. Maisy thought it'd be a good idea to get us all wine drunk last night. I'm resting my head on Olivia's shoulder as we drive.

"You girls look like you had it rough," Sawyer says. Olivia and I both shoot a look to Maisy.

"What I never said that you guys had to drink," Maisy says.

"Uh huh," Olivia says and I laugh.

When we get to the airport we head inside. We have to go through security and all that and I feel horrible doing it. I end up having to get a pat down because my jean zipper set off the metal detector. Olivia and Maisy are in seventh heaven watching me laughing their asses off.

"I hate you both," I say as we head back to our gate.

"You love us," Liv says and I laugh. We sit down and plug our phones in talking about Florida.

We board the plane. I sit next to Sawyer and Olivia and Maisy are behind us. I rest my head on his shoulder and close my eyes as they go through all the mandatory stuff.

By take off, I am fully asleep on Sawyer's shoulder. Thank the lord he is here. I know Maisy and Olivia are jealous they both think he is so hot which makes me want to throw up. He's like my second dad.

I wake up about three hours into the flight. I look back to see Olivia and Maisy sleeping. I laugh at that. Sawyer brushes my hair out of my face and smiles at me.

"You feel better?" He asks.

"Somewhat, I'm still kind of tired," I say rubbing the sleep out of my eyes.

"Did you guys have a fun night?" He asks and I nod.

"We really did," I say and he smiles.

"How has school been this semester compared to last?" He asks me.

"More challenging than ever. Psychology has gotten a lot harder," I admit and he nods.

"Make sure you are utilizing your resources and going to your professors," he says and I nod.

"I know I do. Sometimes it's hard though," I say and he nods.

"I get that, I'm always here if you need me, even though I was a business major," he says.

"Where did you go to school?" I ask him.

"I went to Stanford," he says and my eyes shoot open.

"No way, why didn't I know that?" I ask him.

"I don't know you never asked," he says and I smile.

"Well then why did you start doing personal security," I ask him.

"I was in between jobs and your dad hired me. You know I was your mom's until she had Teddy. Then I became Teddy's and when you were born they were trying to find someone for you and the only person who you would let hold you without screaming was me. So your dad decided that Dovis would go to Teddy and I would be yours," he says and I smile.

"I don't think anyone has ever told me that story," I say and he smiles.

"It's a true story," he says and I smile.

We end up landing in Florida and getting our luggage. We head to Olivia's house. I remember being there when I was with Nathan. It is a beautiful large home.

"Here we are," Olivia says.

"Holy shit, this place is amazing," Maisy says as we get out of the car.

"Thank you," Olivia says.

An older brunette comes running out of the front door who I recognize as Olivia's mom. "Oh my Liv," she says as she hugs Olivia.

"Hi mom," I smile at the reunion. Olivia doesn't get to come home as often as I do. That would be so hard.

"How are you, you look to thin, all of you do," she says making us laugh.

"Hi Phoebe," she says to me and hugs me.

"Hi Mrs. Stands," I say as we hug.

"Oh none of that Mrs. Stands stuff call me Amanda," she says and I smile.

We walk inside and Olivia's house is beautiful. So nicely decorated and built. A guy older than us stands in the kitchen. Whew he is hot.

"Hey Liv," he says as they hug.

"Hi Sam," she says.

"Guys this is Sam my brother," I knew she had an older brother but I never knew he looked like this.

"Hi Sam," I say and we shake hands. I have to nudge Maisy to stop staring at him.

"Hi I'm Maisy," she says and smiles.

We head upstairs to Olivia's room. "You never said your brother was a Greek god," Maisy says hitting Olivia's arm.

"You have a boyfriend," Olivia says.

"Not anymore," Maisy says back.

"What?" Olivia and I say back at the same time.

"Well I was going to tell you guys last night but you both got drunk as skunks," Maisy says and I roll my eyes.

"Says the one who initiated the drinking," I say and she shrugs.

"Whatever, but yeah. Our relationship just hasn't been what it was and we decided it was better to break it off," she says.

"I'm sorry, Mase," I say and she shakes her head.

"It's for the better," she says.

"But about your brother," Maisy says looking at Olivia who smacks her with a pillow.

That night we eat at Olivia's and end up going out. We go to this kid named Taylor's house. It is huge and right on the beach. We are in the backyard drinking and partying. It is so fun meeting all of Nathan and Olivia's friends.

"Hey here she is," I feel a guy put his hand on my shoulder and I spill my drink a bit.

"Uhm hi," I say and suddenly a phone is shoved in my face. I see Nathan on the screen and I smile looking to the guy.

"Nathan couldn't come so we are bring the party to him," the guy says and I smile.

"Hi Nate," I say.

"Hey Bee, you look beautiful," he says and I smile. Ever the charmer.

"How is florida treating you?" He asks.

"It's good really, I miss you though," I say and he smiles.

"I miss you too, be careful tonight and call me later," he says.

"I will, I love you," I say and he smiles blowing me a kiss. The kid he is on the phone with runs away.

The rest of the night is spent partying and drinking. It is so much fun but I know I am going to be hungover as hell tomorrow.

—-

We wake up the next day to quite the hangover. It is 11 and I am ready to get to the pool. We are going to Olivia's friend, Aleena, house.

I get on my white bikini and put on sunscreen. I head out to the porch where Maisy and Olivia are eating fruit salad. "Hey you don't look at all hungover," Maisy says.

"Fuck off," I say and get myself some fruit.

"Good morning to you too," Olivia teases.

"What time did we get in last night?" I ask Olivia.

"When we left Taylor's it was half past 3," Olivia says.

"Fuck," Maisy says and we laugh.

"Today is going to be fun," Maisy says as she makes us mimosas.

"I don't know if I can drink anymore," I say as she pours a generous amount of champagne.

"Hair of the dog, come on you say that every time your hungover," Maisy says and I take my glass.

"To me getting laid," Maisy says and we laugh.

"To a good week in Florida," Olivia says.

We drink our mimosas and sit on the porch. After relaxing for a bit we decide to head to Aleena's. I heard she is very sweet, so I am excited.

On the way there, Nathan calls me. Olivia is taking us in their golf cart which is so much fun. "Hey," I say.

"Hi Bee, how are you?" He asks.

"Good, how are you?" I ask him.

"Great now that I'm talking to you," he says making me smile.

"Are you excited for your game tonight?" I ask him.

"Somewhat excited, I wish I could be in Florida with you," he says and I smile.

"I know I wish you could too," I say.

"Where are you guys going today?" He asks.

"Aleena's house," I tell him.

"Oh that's so much fun, our moms are good friends," he says and I smile.

"Well I will be sure to tell her hello, I think we are here so I have to go," I say.

"Okay be safe, text me," he says.

"I love you," I say.

"Love you more," he says before we hang up.

"Liv," I hear a scream that startled me. A petite brunette starts running towards us.

"Lena," Olivia yells as they hug. Maisy and I smile at each other.

"Aleena these are my friends and roommates Maisy and Phoebe," Olivia introduces us. Aleena hugs Maisy and me being so sweet.

"It's so nice to meet y'all," she says. I can hear a bit of a southern accent from her.

"Well come on in and make yourself at home," she says.

We go into her backyard with a huge pool. It is so nice here. We all lay on lounge chairs and Aleena gives us each a gin and tonic.

"So tell me about y'all," she says. I look to Maisy to start.

"I'm Maisy, I'm from a small town in Utah. I am studying fashion merchandising," she says and I take over.

"I'm Phoebe Grey, I'm from Seattle, I am studying psychology," I say and she nods.

"Well I'm Aleena, I am from Alabama. I moved her my junior year of high school and Liv took me under her wing. I go to University of Alabama and studying economics," she says. I knew she was southern.

"It's so great to meet you," I say.

"Oh my goodness y'all too. Are the drinks okay?" She asks.

"Perfect thank you so much," I say.

We lay out and talk about school. It's so funny hearing how different school is in the south. Aleena seems like the perfect southern bell though. Her boyfriend goes to Alabama too. His name is Chase.

"So Phoebe, I heard you have a pretty serious boyfriend who I know," Aleena says and I smile.

"Yes my boyfriend is Nathan Moore," I say and Aleena smiles.

"No way, Moore picked a good one. How long have y'all been dating," she asks me.

"4 years this November," I say and her eyes bug out.

"4 years. That's longer than my parents were together before they got married. Have you guys gone on breaks," she says.

"No, we haven't. We've been together all four years," I say and sip my drink.

"Holy hell, that's amazing," she says. "Anywho what are we doing tonight," she asks.

"We are going to Reed's," Olivia says as she sips her drink.

"I have not seen him since we have been here. I'm excited I miss that kid," she says.

"His house is on the beach, and I think we are outside tonight because his dad is home," Olivia says and Aleena nods.

"I'm so hot," Maisy says and jumps in the pool. I follow her and jump in.

After swimming and laying out for awhile, we head back home to get ready. I have decided to wear my black romper that is completely open back. I curl my hair and do my makeup.

We eat dinner at Olivia's house. Her mom made us gnocchi and it was so good. We also had glasses of wine with dinner. Olivia's parents are very relaxed as long as they have the keys to her car and golf cart.

"Okay, you guys ready?" Olivia asks. We head out and start walking to Reed's. It's at most a ten minute walk.

We get there and head inside. It is a beautiful house that leads right to the beach. We walk to the backyard and there's loud music and lots of drinking.

"Liv," two girls run up to Olivia. Maisy and I go to get drinks. I make myself a vodka lemonade. Maisy uses the club soda and vodka.

We walk out and I see Aleena. We walk over to her and she is talking to a strawberry blonde I know I have seen before.

"Hey ladies," Aleena says. "This is Sloan," she smiles and greets us both.

"Phoebe and I met when Nate brought her down here a couple summers ago," she says and I knew I knew her from somewhere.

"Sloan, it has been too long," I hear a males voice say.

"Aj, i assure you it hasn't," she rolls her eyes and I fight back my laughter. I like her sass.

"Oh don't be like that, aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" He asks.

"Are you not capable?" She says and I smile.

"I'm Aj, nice to meet you guys," he says and we shake his hand.

"Phoebe," I say and shake his hand.

"So where are you ladies from?" He asks.

"We both go to Washington state with Olivia," I say and he looks to Aleena.

"Nice, I go to the University of Washington," he says and we smile.

"Oh cool, so you live close to Phoebe then," Maisy says.

"You're a Seattle girl?" He asks.

"Yeah, born and raised," I say and he gives Aleena a look to which she shakes her head.

"Well it's been good talking to you both I need to go say hey to my brother," he says and walks off.

"Aj is going to try and get with you," Aleena says and looks at me.

"What? No he isn't," I say and she laughs.

"The look he gave me, trust me he is. Aj is a dick, his twin brother Cole who is right there, is a saint," Aleena says.

"I have a boyfriend, I don't want him trying to get with me," I say and Maisy laughs. I glare at her and she sips her drink.

"Don't worry, you just have to be straight up with him," Aleena says and I nod.

We head out and start talking to a bunch of people. All of Nathan's friends come up and meet me. They all tell me to have Moore get his ass back here. It makes me smile.

I excuse myself to use the restroom and head inside. I relieve myself in the beautifully done first floor bathroom and then head out. When I walk out Aj is standing leaning against the wall.

"Hey Phoebe is it?" He says and uncrosses his arms.

"Yep," I say.

"So I was thinking sense your family lives in Seattle you probably are there a lot," he says.

"Yeah," I say and he smiles.

"So if you ever want to come see UW I wanted to give you this," he passed me a card with his number on it. "I live in an apartment and my room has a futon in it," he says and I sigh.

"Aj I have a boyfriend. I appreciate the offer a lot and am sure UW is amazing," I say and he smiles.

"Who said I was trying to get with you," he says as he puts his hand on the wall above me leaning against it.

I hold up his number that he has written out on a small card.

"I'm just being friendly, Phoebe. If I wanted you, I would already have you," he says and I scoff. What a self absorbed prick.

"Yeah I'm sure, now didn't you have to use the restroom?" I say.

"No," he says.

"Do you wait outside while everyone pees?" I ask him and start to walk outside before he can answer. What a dick.

I walk out to Maisy and she is drunk talking to some guy. "Phoebe, this is Anthony, he goes to Arizona," she says and I smile at him.

"Nice to meet you," I say. I've reached my quota of meeting guys.

I end up going and doing shots with Sloan and Aleena. We do about 6 and I am really starting to feel them. I stumble out to the beach with Sloan and we put our toes in the water.

"It is so nice out here," she slurs and I nod laughing.

"It is amazing," I say.

"Wanna go get in his pool?" She asks.

"Of course, let's do it," I laugh. We run and jump into his pool with everyone. The rest of the night ends up being so much fun. We get home at about 3 in the morning.

This is the vacation I needed more than anything just a bunch of fun and little stress.

—-

We got home from the beach a couple of days ago. It is starting to not be freezing in Vancouver too so it is nice. I am adjusting back to classes and normal life.

I just got back from my psych class and am stopping at the Brew. I grab myself a coffee and danish. I see andrew sitting at a table working on his laptop.

"Hey stranger," I say.

"Oh my gosh, hey Phoebe," he says and we hug.

"Sit with me, tell me about break," he says. I sit and start eating my danish with him.

"It was so much fun, we went out a lot with Olivia's friends from home and just laid out at the pool during the day," I say and he smiles.

"That sounds like so much fun," he says.

"How were the mountains?" I ask him. Andrew went hiking with some frat guys over spring break.

"The views were amazing and it was a lot of fun," he says. He shows me some pictures and they were amazing.

"How was class," he says eyeing my backpack that I still have on.

"It was fine, still getting back into the swing of things, what are you working on?" I ask him.

"Internship applications," he says and I nod.

"Which ones are you going for?" I ask him.

"Well the big one would be your fathers, and the others are at smaller companies," he says.

"No way, I will have to tell him and put in a good word for you," I say and he smiles.

"You would do that?" He asks.

"Of course I would, besides I doubt there are people out there that are better than you," I say and he laughs.

"Look I got to go because I have a paper due tonight, but it was so good to see you. Will I see you out tomorrow?" I ask him.

"Yes you will, I am excited," he says and I smile. I take my coffee to go and wave as I walk out.

I walk home to my apartment building. When I head up and put the key in the door I see it is already open. I am confused because Maisy is in Utah and Olivia has slept at Tjs and hasn't been home since.

I walk in and scream falling on my butt and dropping my coffee. Nathan is sitting on my couch. He jumps up and runs over to me.

"Nathan what the, what are you doing here?" I ask. I sit up and he helps me up.

"Are you Okay?" He asks as we hug. Oh this boy.

"You scared the shit out of me," I say and he smiles.

"I'm sorry baby," he says and kisses my head.

"Oh my god, you are here! What are you doing here?" I ask him and hug him again. It just hit me that he's really here.

"Well when we talked on the phone and said I wouldn't see you till May it bummed me out. So since the team has a week off I came here to see you," he says and I smile.

"Oh my gosh, you are really here," I say. I can't even believe it.

"How did you? Who let you in? Did Olivia know?" I ask him.

"Yeah that's why she's staying at Tjs this weekend," he says and I smile.

"Oh my gosh I owe her one. What were you going to do about Maisy?" I ask.

"That was just pure luck that she was gone," he says and I laugh.

"Well I just got back from class as you can see and got myself a coffee," I say.

"Did you eat? I'm starving you have no food in this place," he says and I laugh.

"Yeah It was Maisy's week to grocery shop," I say and he nods looking at our chore chart.

"It also was your week to do the dishes," he says and points to the pile of dishes that need put away.

"Hey I'm working on it," I smile.

"I'll do that now," I say and start loading the dishwasher. I feel a hand sneak around my waist.

"Why don't we do something else?" He says and I smile.

"Like what?" I ask.

"Here," he puts his hands on my hips and lifts me up onto the counter.

He puts his hands on my thighs and starts kissing me. I start kissing him back harder. My hands go into his hair. I tug it a bit. His hands slide up my body and my shirt to find my chest.

I moan into his mouth as he teases me. I can barely take it anymore. "Bedroom," I say against his lips. He lifts me up under my thighs and walks into my room.

He lays me on my bed and pulls off his shirt. He gets on top of me and we start kissing again. His hands find the hem of my shirt and pull it off me.

"God you are so beautiful," he says as he starts to kiss my neck and down. He goes down to my leggings and pulls them off. Not the sexiest attire but I think we are past that.

I keep kissing him and he pulls off my panties. "Let's try something new today," He says into my ear as his fingers slip inside of me.

"What," I moan out as my back arches as he hits that one spot.

"Get on your hands and knees and face away from me," he says and I blush.

I do as he says and feel so exposed. His hand travels down my back and he puts his hands on my hips. He lines himself up with me and pushes himself inside of me. Oh this is weird and different.

"Fuck," I moan out. It is different but it feels so good.

"Ahh Nathan," I say as he starts pushing in and out.

"You're so tight," he says into my ear.

He holds my hips and keeps slamming into me. Finally we both start to build and finish at the same time. I lay flat on my belly as Nathan cleans the both of us up.

"Was that okay?" He asks.

"Okay? That was more than okay," I say and he smiles.

"I'm hungry," Nathan says as he comes back into my room.

"Well let's go eat then," I say.

We walk out and I grab my purse. We head out to the bagel deli down the street. The best bagels in the world. We get a seat by the window and wait for our food.

"How long are you here for?" I ask him.

"Til Sunday night, my flight leaves at 8 pm," he says and I smile.

"I can't believe you are here," I say.

"I am so happy to be here," he says. "What are we going to do?" He asks.

"Tomorrow we have a formal, I'm sure Olivia told you and that's why Andrew blew me off for it," I say and he smiles.

"Guilty, I'm excited," he says.

"Me too, oh my goodness," I say.

The rest of the lunch is spent talking about our plans and what we are going to do tomorrow. We eat and enjoy then head back to the apartment for some much needed chill out time.

APRIL

It's our April first formal! I don't know where the tradition started, but I love it. I am wearing a tight blue dress that is short and laces up in the back. My parents definitely wouldn't approve.

Right now I am curling my hair. Nathan is sitting on my bed and watching me. We have my room window open and the breeze feels amazing.

"You're hair is so long," he says.

"I know I need to get it cut," I say and he laughs.

"What," I ask.

"You have been saying that since junior year of high school," he says and I shrug.

"It'll happen one day," I say and he smiles.

After I finish curling my hair, I have to do my makeup. For this formal I'm just doing a natural look. Nathan sits watching me and after I'm done he smiles.

"You look absolutely stunning," he says and I smile.

"Thank you," I say.

I slip on my dress and put on my heels. Olivia and TJ are in the kitchen drinking already. Nathan is in his suit and looks so hot.

"Hey guys," Liv says.

"Hey you look stunning," I say and she smiles.

"Speak for yourself," she says. I give TJ a hug.

"Hey Pheebs," he says.

"Hey TJ, this is my boyfriend Nathan Moore," I say and they shake hands.

"Hey man, I'm TJ," he says and they talk. Olivia makes us both drinks. She hands me mine and I thank her. I grab Nathan a beer from the fridge and open it for him. He kisses my head and thanks me.

"Well should we head over to the hotel?" Olivia asks. This formal is at the heathman hotel.

"Yep the Uber is two minutes away," TJ says.

We lock up the apartment and head down. We Uber to the heathman hotel where they gave us hotel rooms and the main lounge for the formal.

We walk in and get escorted down to the lounge. It is so nice in here. The music is loud and I can already tell the liquor is being poured. I get a sex on the beach drink which Nathan makes fun of me for and he gets another beer.

We walk out and I spot Caroline. She smiles and walks over to us. She gives us both big hugs and lots of love. "Oh my gosh it is so good to see you guys. Phoebe I swear I've seen more of your brother than you," she says and I laugh.

"I know I've been so busy, how is he?" I ask her.

"Amazing as usual. Trying to plan when I can come visit you in the summer," she says.

"Nathan, it's good to see you too. When did you get here?" She asks.

"Just yesterday actually, I about scared the crap out of Phoebe when she was walking inside her apartment," he says and I laugh.

"Did you not know he was coming?" She asks and I shake my head no.

"Well for heaven's sake, Moore. You are good," she says and I laugh.

"Okay I need to go get myself another drink. I will see you two later," she says and I smile. She walks off and leaves Nathan and Me. We go to a standing table and talk.

"This is so nice," he says.

"This is where my parents spent their first night together," I say.

"Ew why do you know that?" He asks. Oh lord he thinks I meant… ew gross.

"Okay ew get your head out of the gutter. No my mom went to WSU and she got super drunk and called my dad and he had to come pick her up. He took her back here and had to take care of her," I say and he smiles.

"Well is that isn't a love story I don't know what is," he says and I sip my drink.

"You are very right my friend," I say and all of a sudden I feel two arms wrap around me.

"Hey stranger," I hear Andrew's voice.

"Hey long time no see," I smile. He comes over and greets Nathan.

"It's good to see you, man," Andrew says.

"Good to see you too, how's life been?" Nathan asks.

"It's been good, lots of applying for internships and studying, but I can't complain. How is New Jersey?" Andrew asks.

"It's great, lots of studying too. Basketball season is over and I'm just ready for summer," he says and I smile.

"Me too, I'll have to come and visit you guys," he says and we both nod.

"Yes, come to Seattle. It would be so much fun," I say.

"Yes you could stay with either of us," Nathan says.

"And you two need to make the drive to Portland," Andrew says.

"Oh my gosh, my dad is there like once every month. We could totally come visit," I say.

"That would be fun," Nathan says.

"You guys could meet all my high school friends," he says.

"We will have to figure out a date, Nathan you'd love Portland's hiking," he says.

"What about me?" I ask. They look at me and laugh.

"I hate you both," I smirk.

"No you don't, Grey," Andrew says.

"Yeah yeah, well I need another drink I'll be right back," I say.

"Here let me come with you," Nathan says.

"I'm fine, babe. I'll be right back," I say and he eyes me.

I walk over to the bar leaving Nathan and Andrew to talk. I order a sex on the beach and feel someone looking at me. I look over and see Cole. The guys who told me he had a long distance girlfriend when really he was just trying to get with me.

I look back to the bartender and ignore him. I get my drink and before I can walk back to Nathan I bump into a chest. I look up and see Cole.

"Phoebe, so good to see you," he says. "You look so nice," he says.

"Thanks," I say and he smiles.

"So I think I owe you an apology," he says and I laugh.

"You think," I say.

"Look, I was under the influence of drugs and all sorts of things. I never meant to hurt you," he says and I sigh. Maybe it's the liquid courage getting me to be so brazen.

"Look, we will never be friends after what happened. You tried to take advantage of me and pretend you knew about what I was going through," I say.

"And for that I am sorry," he says.

"I appreciate your apology, now if you'll excuse me," I get cut off by Nathan wrapping a hand around my waist.

"Hi I was just coming over to you," I smile.

"I'm Cole Harrison," he reaches his hand out to Nathan.

"Nathan Moore," they shake hands and this is probably one of the most uncomfortable I've ever felt.

"Nice to meet you, Nathan. You go to Princeton?" He asks.

"Yeah, you go to WSU right," Nathan says and I take a big sip of my drink.

"Yes, I thought I recognized you though. You play basketball?" He says and Nathan nods.

"I do, so how do you know Phoebe?" Nathan asks. Oh this should be good.

"Uh well we met at a party a couple months ago," he says and I roll my eyes. I spot Olivia and Kendra talking.

"We should go say hi to Kendra, it was nice talking to you," I say and take Nathan's hand pulling him.

"Okay What the hell is up with that guy?" Nathan asks as we walk over to Kendra.

"He's a prick," I say and Nathan laughs.

"You have such a nice mouth," he says and I laugh.

"Nathan Moore, you snuck in here," Kendra says as she hugs him then me.

"Wow look at you, sexy mama," she says and I smile.

"Oh thank you," I say.

"Are you guys staying here tonight?" She asks us.

"Uhm we haven't decided. We have the apartment to ourselves so we may just go back there," I say and she smiles.

"You horndogs," she says

"Shut up," I say laughing. I really have to pee. I'm way drunker than I thought.

"I have to pee, I'll be back," I say.

"Go with her," Kendra says.

"I was planning on it, nice talking to you," he says. I take Nathan's hand and we fight our way through the crowd and go to the bathroom. It's a one person bathroom so we both just go in.

"Face that way," I say as he unzips my dress for me.

"On it," he says. He faces the wall and I go pee. I stand up and fix my underwear.

I flush the toilet and go wash my hands. As I'm fixing myself in the mirror Nathan comes up behind me.

"You look beautiful," he says and I laugh.

"You do," he says.

"I'm way too drunk for my own good," I say and he laughs.

"That should be your last drink," he says and kisses my neck.

"Mmm we'll see," I say.

We walk out of the bathroom to a girl who just smirks at us. I take Nathan's hand and he walks out with me. We go over to the bar area.

"Let's do shots," I say.

"Are you nuts?" He asks.

"Maybe, what are you chicken?" I ask him and he glares.

"You're on," he says and I laugh.

"Can we have 4 tequila shots?" I ask him.

Nathan and I each take one and a lime. "Cheers to you, Ms. Grey," he says and I smirk. We clink our glasses and down a shot. I suck on the lime and shake my head. Ugh.

"This one is for you, Mr. Moore," I say and we cheers and down the second shot.

After shots we go to the dance floor. We dance for awhile and I end up taking my shoes off. I am so drunk. It is so much fun though. At around 3 in the morning people start heading off to their hotel rooms.

"Should we have Sawyer take us?" I ask him.

"Yeah let's get out of here," he says and I laugh. We go to Sawyer's car and he drives us to my apartment. We thank him and head upstairs.

"I can't get my key in," I laugh.

"Oh lord," Nathan says and takes it and opens it. I sit on the couch trying to undo my shoes which Nathan ends up coming to help me do. I lay on the couch and Nathan brings over water.

"Drink this," he says and I take it gladly drinking it. After I lay back down on the couch.

"Come to bed," Nathan says.

"I'm fine here," I say.

"Come on," Nathan says and I shake my head. I feel him lift me up bridal style and I laugh. He puts me on my bed and takes off my dress.

I get under the covers and he kisses me and gets under with me.

"Sleep now," he says and I nod.

"I love you," I say.

"I love you more," he says.

—-

Nathan has been gone for a week now. I have started studying for exams because they are next week. I get done a week earlier than I was last year which is super nice.

Right now I am at The Brew studying for my psychology exams. Next year is the year that I really have to focus on where I want psychology to take me. I am really leaning towards child psychology.

Nobody knows yet, but I am going to meet with a child psychologist at the children's hospital in Vancouver. Sawyer of course knows because he is driving me, but besides that no one knows.

I leave Thursday at 8 am for the meeting. I am working on questions to ask her while studying. Multitasking at its finest. I have my iced coffee to keep me company and I am plowing through this stuff.

After hour four at the Brew I am officially exhausted and they are closing in 30 minutes. I shut my laptop and pack up. I walk out and start heading back to my apartment.

I get inside and head into my room. I take a quick shower and get into my pjs. I head into my room and start studying again. I hear my phone ring and look down and grab it.

"Hey dad," I say when I see he is calling.

"Bubs, how are you sweetheart?" He asks.

"I'm good, really good actually," I say.

"I'm so glad to hear that, what's been going on?" He asks.

"Well Nathan cape to visit last weekend and I'll be done with school next week," I say and I hear him laugh.

"Well that's always a cause for celebration isn't it," he says and I smile.

"Yes it is, so what's up?" I ask him.

"We haven't heard from you in awhile, I was calling to check in. You haven't forgot about us have you?" He asks.

"Are you kidding? You know I would never," I say and he laughs.

"Well we are talking about the girl who hid in the back of my car, so she could come to work with me," he says and I laugh.

"Oh my gosh not that story," I say and he laughs.

(Flashback Phoebe 6)

Christmas break is over and it is time to return to work. It is a very hard transition for me and for the kids, especially Phoebe. Ana is taking another week off, but I can't do that.

I am in my black Armani suit and tie. I walk downstairs and see Teddy eating pancakes. Ana is reading per usual and drinking her coffee. I walk over to her and kiss her.

"Hi handsome," she says and straightens my tie.

"Hi beautiful," I say. I kiss Teddy's head and ruffle his hair. My 9 year old is not amused by that.

"Hey Dad, when you get home from work tonight can we play catch?" Teddy asks me.

"Of course we can," I say as I sip my coffee. He smiles and takes another bite of his pancake.

"Phoebe is still sleeping?" She asks.

"She was when I went in there. She must be tired from all the playing yesterday," I say and my wife smiles. I played princesses for hours.

"I'll write her a note, then I have to go," I say.

Dear Bubs,

You must have been sleepy this morning! I have to go to work but when I get back we can play! I love you most, my sweet girl!

X- Daddy

I kiss my wife and son goodbye then grab my briefcase. I get into my Audi and put my briefcase in the front seat. I turn on my podcast and start heading to work. Traffic as usual is horrible.

I get to work in a half hour. I park in my spot and grab my briefcase heading upstairs. I get the usual hello Mr. Grey and welcome backs from my staff.

I greet Andrea with a smile and she thanks me for her Christmas gift. She is so helpful to me it is the least I could do. I go into my office and fire up my laptop preparing for the massive amount of work I have to do.

I have so many contracts that need read over and signed. I also have a massive amount of emails to respond to. My phone starts to ring and I see it is Mr. Davis. An important businessman on my new deal.

"Mr. Davis, how good to hear from you," I say.

We go over a contract he faxed me. All of a sudden my call is interrupted by Taylor calling me. Frustrated, I decline his call and continue with Mr. Davis.

A couple of minutes go by and Andrea starts to call my work line. I decline her call too. Is everyone trying to interrupt me today? I continue the deal and finally there is a knock on my door.

"Mr. Davis could you give me one minute?" I ask him. He says of course and I put him on hold.

"What?" I roar. This better be good.

"Mr. Grey, Taylor says there is something you need to come deal with in the parking lot," Andrea says. What in the hell is this.

"Can he not do it himself?" I ask her. She looks at a loss for words.

"Christ, I'll be down in 5 minutes," I say and she nods apologizing for interrupting me. This better be good if he is making me stop my work.

I apologize to Mr. Davis and schedule to finish the call at three. I head downstairs and enter the parking garage. I hear crying, not just any crying. Phoebe's crying.

"Taylor?" I run over to my car. I see phoebe sitting in the back of my car crying with Taylor standing over her. She is still in her pajamas and has her blanket with her.

"Phoebe?" I say. She runs to me and clings against my legs tightly. I bend down and pick her up and she grips onto me for dear life.

"What is going on?" I look to Taylor for answers. I am so confused.

"I was looking at the security cameras when your car alarm went off. I ran down here and saw your car door open. I also saw Phoebe hiding in the corner. I am assuming she hid in your backseat this morning after you came downstairs and drove here to work with you. Since your car is locked when she tried to get out it set the alarm off," Taylor says. I am shocked beyond belief. I have no words.

"Phoebe Grace Grey, is that true?" I ask her and she whimpers into my shoulder. She knows she is in trouble.

"Call and notify Ana please. I will bring her home after we talk in my office," I say and shut my car door. I can't believe this is happening. Today of all days too.

I take phoebe up to my office and she hides in my shoulder the entire time. I can't believe she did this. Not only is it unsafe for her to not be buckled but if Ana went up to her room and she wasn't there she would have flipped out.

I set Phoebe down in one of the chairs in my office and I grab a tissue. I feel horrible that she is crying but I can't back down. I sit in a chair facing her and pull it close so we are face to face. I wipe her face off and sigh.

"Phoebe, did you hide in Daddy's car and sneak out of the house?" I ask her. She looks down at her legs and kicks them back and forth.

"Phoebe, look at me when I talk to you," I say. Her tear stained eyes peek up.

"Yes," She says.

"Do you know how unsafe and bad that is?" I ask her.

"I didn't- I didn't want you to leave, Daddy," she says.

"Phoebe, if I would have gotten into a car accident you would have been seriously hurt. You can't get into a car and not wear a seatbelt. And you know the rules about leaving the house. Sawyer or mommy or daddy has to be with you. They also have to know where you are. If mommy went upstairs to get you and say you weren't home she would have been worried sick. This was very bad," I scold her and she frowns.

"I'm so- sorry. I just wanted to be with you," she says and it takes everything out of me not to crack.

"Phoebe, you know daddy comes home whenever he works. I have to be gone for a couple of hours, but I always come home. You can't leave the house and try to come with me," I say and she cries.

"Phoebe, do you understand that what you did today was very bad?" I ask her.

"Yes I could have gotten hurt," she says and I nod.

"And mommy would have been very sad," I say.

"I don't want mommy to be sad," she says.

"I know, when we get home there will be no TV or iPad time, you also have to write Sawyer and mommy I'm sorry notes. And since you didn't sleep today, you are going to take a nap," I say. She nods and picks at her hands.

"Do I have to go home?" Phoebe asks. I sigh and pull her into my lap. She curls up against my chest and it is so hard to be stern.

"Yes you do, but we are going to wait til the morning rush hour is over," I say and she nods pretending like she understands. I take her over to my desk chair and rub her back. She must be exhausted. I see a nap in her future.

"That's me," she says as she points at the picture frame I have of her.

"That is you," I say. "I love that picture of you," I tell her. Her belly rumbles and I look down at her.

"Are you hungry?" I ask her and she nods. She didn't eat breakfast. I feel like such an idiot. I should have asked.

"Let's go get you breakfast," I say and she hops off my lap. She reaches for my hand and we walk out of my office. I take her down to the Starbucks in my building. She of course has to press the buttons in the elevator and is so proud of herself when she does. People smile and laugh as I walk by with my daughter in pajamas and rain boots.

"Okay come this way," I say and lead her into the Starbucks.

"Hi Mr. Grey, what can we get for you?" The woman working asks. I pick Phoebe up, and get her a cinnamon roll and myself a coffee.

"Thank you," Phoebe says. I smile and take her to a table. I sit across from her and give her the cinnamon roll.

"Thanks," She says and I smile. It's so hard to be mad at her. Even though what she did was so reckless.

"Daddy, what time do you get home?" She asks me. She is on her knees on the chair so she is propped up higher.

"I will be home by 6 tonight," I say and she holds up 6 fingers.

"How many hours is that?" She asks. I look at my clock and it is 9:30.

"About eight hours," I say and she frowns.

"That's too many hours, what about three hours?" She asks and I laugh. I wipe her face off with a napkin.

"That's not enough hours. Daddy has to do his job," I tell her and she frowns.

"But I miss you," she says and my heart melts.

"And I miss you, but Daddy always comes home and we eat dinner together and play outside after," I tell her.

"Can we do bubbles tonight?" She asks. Mia got her this special bubble blowing wand and she loves it.

"Of course we can," I say. She finishes up her food.

"Okay Bubs, let's get my keys from my office and get you home," I say.

"Do I have to go, Daddy? I can stay in your office and be super quiet," she says and I smile down at her. I pick her up on my hip and she lays her head on my shoulder.

"You have to go home, Bubs. I have to work," I say and she nods. I think she is content with the time she got while she was here.

We go up to my office and andrea gives her a big hug. As I explain the story she is trying to hold back her laughter. "Oh Phoebe Girl," she says.

I grab my keys and wrap Phoebe in my coat. She didn't bring her coat which isn't shocking. She would run outside in January with a dress on if we let her. She is our wild child.

I buckle her in her booster seat and go up front. I turn on her princess music and start driving. "Daddy, is mommy mad?" She asks me.

"Bubs, mommy is upset that you left the house without telling her or me. She also is upset that you didn't wear a seatbelt or sit in a booster. She knows we talked about it though, but you should still say sorry," I tell her and she nods.

We get to the house in no time. I get Phoebe out and we walk in. Ana is standing there with her hands on her hips and her mom face on. She looks so sexy. Phoebe looks down at her feet.

"Mommy, I am sorry I left the house without telling you," Phoebe says.

"You are never to do that again. Ever. You will be in big trouble," Ana says and Phoebe looks to me. I point to Ana, she isn't getting out of this one.

"I know, I'm sorry," Phoebe says and she goes over to Ana and wraps her arms around her. Ana bends down and takes Phoebe in her arms hugging her. I smile at Ana and she winks at me.

"Phoebe, Daddy has to go to work go say goodbye," Ana says.

She walks over and I bend down. "Bye Daddy, I love you," Phoebe says.

"Bye Bubs, I'll see you tonight," I say and kiss her head.

"I think I'm going to make mommy a sorry card, and bubbles tonight remember," Phoebe whispers in my ear.

"That's a good idea, and yes lots of bubbles tonight," I say and she laughs.

"Give me a kiss then I have to go," she does and I smile. She runs off to her art table and leaves Ana and me.

"Have an amazing day at work Mr. Grey," my wife says.

"Thank you Mrs. Grey, I'll see you tonight," I say and kiss her goodbye.

I head out and head back to work. I finished the day off and as promised play with Ted and do bubbles with Phoebe.

(End of flashback)

—

Today I have my meeting with the child psychologist at Vancouver Children's hospital. I am in a blouse and dress pants. This is the first time I feel like an adult. I grab my coffee cup and walk out the door.

I get in Sawyer's car and he turns and looks at me. "You are not a baby anymore," he says and I smile.

"I know I look too old in this outfit," I say and he laughs.

"You look more like an adult than a teenager," he says.

"Well I am 20," I say and he shakes his head.

"And I can't believe it," he says. Neither can I to be honest.

We start heading towards the hospital and I have my notebook out in front of me. I am reviewing the questions I have for her. It's a lot about the job and working in a hospital.

I'm quite nervous for this meeting. I want to be taken seriously, and look like I have an interest in the job. I reviewed my questions with my professor and she said they were all great questions.

We pull up to the hospital and I thank Sawyer. He wishes me luck and I get out. I take my coffee and my notebook and walk into the building. I go to the front and have to show my ID. I get a badge that I have to wear and get taken upstairs to a meeting room.

"Dr. Rook will be here soon," the nice woman says.

"Thank you so much," I say and she shuts the door.

I look through my questions one more time and get my pen ready, so I can write down all the answers to her questions. After about five minutes the door opens. I stand up and see a tall older woman.

"You must be Phoebe," she says.

"Hi Dr. Rook, it is so nice to meet you. Thank you for taking your time to meet with me," I say and she smiles.

"Oh dear, it's no problem. I am always willing to help the future of my career," she says and smiles.

We sit down and I let her get situated. She has her tea in a mug and a warm smile on her face. She reminds me of my grandma.

"So you have some questions I assume?" She says and I nod.

"Well ask away," she says.

"How easy was it for you to get a job in a pediatric hospital?" I ask her.

"Now this job came at the perfect time for me 30 years ago. I was fresh out of college and this hospital had just opened. They were looking for a qualified psychologist and I came in. I didn't get the job at first but I continued to pursue the career and the hospital. Eventually they saw my potential and gave in," she says and I write down her answer nodding.

"Now for you I do not think it should be too difficult. But you do have to be flexible about where you work. If you have your heart set on one place like me and they don't have any open positions it will take longer to get the job. As long as you are flexible the job will come to you," she says and I nod.

"What does a normal day look like for you?" I ask her.

"Well when I first get here I check if I have any new patients to visit. Usually, I have about one or two every couple of days. But I make my rounds to my patients and spend about an hour each with them. I have to plan what I am going to do in each session and then after help the doctors and nurses to ensure that the patient's care is the best it can possibly be. I also have to chart and document the sessions. Every Friday I have a meeting with the psychosocial services department. There usually is some meetings scattered in but besides that not much else goes on," she says and I nod.

"I assume you hear some pretty heavy stuff. How do you keep your mental health and positivity in check?" I ask her.

"It's all about self care. If you want to help the kids you have to be in the right state to do it. You have to make sure you are a hundred percent so they can get your full potential of a psychologist. I run a lot and drink tea. I read and relax when I need it," she says and I nod.

"What should I start doing now that I want to be a child psychologist?" I ask.

"I would start being around kids and volunteering as soon as you can. The more experience you have the better," she says.

"How many psychologists are there in the hospital?" I ask her.

"There are eight of us," she says. "We all work different shifts and floors," she says. "Soon we will need more." I nod and write that down.

"Who do you work with mostly in the hospital?" I ask her.

"I am around nurses a fair share because if I am with a patient sometimes they will come in and do a quick check or give them their medicine. I work with the doctors too, keeping them updated on the patient's mental health and how we can assure the best care. I also work with social workers if there is a case of neglect or abuse," she says and I nod.

"What is your schedule like?" I ask her.

"I am here Monday through Friday either 9-4 or 10-7," she says and I nod. That's not bad.

"Is there anything else I should know about the field?" I ask.

"It is amazing. My job is my pride and joy. These kids need friends and people to talk to that aren't coming to give them medicine or poke and prod at them. You seem like a good fit for this job," she says and I smile.

"I thank you for that, that means a lot to me," I say.

"Thank you so much for seeing me and taking time out of your day," I say.

"Of course. Please feel free to email me if you have any extra questions," she says and I shake her hand.

We part ways and I walk to Sawyer's car. "How did it go kid?" He asks.

"Well I know I want to be a child psychologist," I say and he smiles.

"I'm so proud of you," he says and I thank him.

Time to start working towards my goal.

—-

I just finished my last exam and now I am on my way home. I am so ready for summer. Sawyer has all my stuff packed up in his car. We are about 5 minutes from my house.

When we get home I tell sawyer that I am going to say hi before I get all my stuff out. I run inside and see my mom.

"Oh sweetheart, you look amazing," she says as we hug. I haven't seen her in two months.

"I missed you," I say.

"I know I missed you more," she says and I smile.

"Where's dad," I ask looking around.

"Some things never change," she says teasing me. "He is stuck at work said he should be home as soon as possible," she says and I nod.

"That's fine, I'm going to help Sawyer unload my stuff," I say.

"Oh I'll help too," she says.

We all go outside and start loading my into the house. I have way more stuff than I thought. As I put all my stuff away in my room I realized how much I missed it.

After an hour of unloading and organizing we are done. "Oh my goodness, let's all go get a drink," my mom says. We walk downstairs and she gets me an iced tea and Sawyer a coke. He excuses himself to go talk to Davis.

"So tell me how was the rest of the year?" She asks.

"It flew by but it was so good. Nathan came to visit at the end of last month and seeing him was so nice. It was just a really good year," I say and she smiles.

"You don't know how happy I am to hear that," she says. We both hear the front door open and my dad walks in.

"Bubs," he says. I smile and walk over to him giving him the biggest hug.

"You look way too thin, we need to get pizza tonight," he says and I shake my head laughing.

"It's nice to see you too," I tease him.

"When does teddy get home?" I ask.

"Not for another two weeks you are early this year," he says and I nod.

"I am very early. All my exams were the first week," I shrug.

"That's nice though. We get more time with you. When does Nathan come home," my dad asks.

"This Friday," I say and they smile.

On the front door there is a knock. I look to my parents and my mom palms her face. "Oh lord I forgot Rose was bringing over a manuscript for me she has the kids with her," I get so excited.

"No way let me hide and surprise them," I say ducking behind the counter.

"Hey guys," my mom opens the door.

"Is Bee Bee home?" I hear Spencer's voice and smile.

"Bee Bee Bee Bee," I hear Drew repeating Spencer. Oh my gosh he is almost 3 that blows my mind. Spencer is going to be five. Quinn is seven and Charlie is 8. It is so crazy how fast time flies. That makes me feel so old.

"I don't know why don't you guys go check?" My mom smiles.

I hear the pitter patter of feet and soon I am tackled by 4 kids. "Bee you're home," Quinn says. I smile and hug them all. I hear my parents and mrs. Cruz laughing.

"You guys are so big now," I say.

"I two," Drew holds up two fingers. I smile and grab him and lift him up kissing his belly.

"You are two. And you missy are going to be five?" I say and she laughs.

"I'm going to be in kindergarten," she says and I can't believe it.

"Who said you were allowed to turn 8?" I ask Charlie.

"Uhm God?" He says and we all laugh.

"Are you babysitting us this summer?" Spencer asks.

"Of course I am," I say and she smiles so big.

"Hey Rose, sense Jason is out of town, why don't you all stay over for dinner?" My mom asks.

"They are so picky it's really okay," mrs. Cruz says.

"We are ordering pizza," my mom smiles.

"No mom please," Charlie says. All the kids start begging.

"Fine fine, but what do you guys say to Mr. Christian and Ms. Ana," they all harmonize a big thank you. The boys ask to go play in the basement. They love it down there of course and my dad says yes.

"Spencer Cruz what am I chopped liver?" My dad asks her. She laughs and runs over hugging him.

"Did I hear you were turning 5?" He asks. She nods with a big smile.

"Oh my goodness," he says and she laughs. I see Drew and bend down picking him up. I bop his nose and he laughs.

"I can't believe he is almost three," I say to mrs. Cruz.

"I know, he's almost fully potty trained too," she says and I looked down with a wide open mouth at him and he giggles.

"I go pee pee on potty," he says and we all laugh.

"I won't have two in diapers like I had with him and Spencer," she says. My parents and I give her a weird look.

"What do you mean?" I ask. She quickly covers her mouth and shakes her head.

"Oh my gosh I wasn't supposed to say anything. We haven't even told the kids yet," she says. I look to my parents. Is she saying what I think she is?

"Are you?" My mom says and she nods.

"Oh my gosh, Rose," My mom hugs her.

"Congratulations," My dad and I say. I put Drew down and hug her.

"I know it's crazy and to be honest a big surprise," she says and unbuttons her jacket showing her tiny belly.

"How far along are you?" My mom asks.

"Fifteen weeks," she says and we smile.

"Are you going to find out the gender?" We ask.

"This time yes. I can't do another gender neutral nursery they are a pain," she says and we laugh.

"Bee, is Nathan home?" Spencer asks. Hearing her say Nathan instead of Natin breaks my heart.

"He is not. But you know what we could do?" I ask her.

"What?" She asks.

"FaceTime him," I say and she smiles.

"In your room?" She asks and I nod.

"Let's go do it," I say and take her hand.

"Up up," I hear a little pitter patter of feet behind me.

"Drew no," Spencer says. I smile and bend down picking him up.

"It's okay he can sit and watch while we FaceTime," I say and she takes my hand. We go into my room and I set drew on the bed with us. He sits between my legs playing with stuffed jaguar.

I call Nathan on FaceTime and he answers pretty quickly. "Hey baby," He says and Spencer grabs the phone.

"Nathan," She says and he looks surprised.

"Spencer Cruz, look how big you are," he says and I smile.

"Look at Drew," she says and I laugh. Nathan gasps.

"Hi buddy," I smile as Drew looks confused but waves anyway.

"You both have gotten so big," Nathan says.

"When will you be here?" Spencer asks.

"In a couple days, and when I get home I will have to come over with Bee," he says. Spencer claps.

"Can you draw with me?" Spencer asks him.

"Raw Raw," Drew holds up my leopard print skirt.

"Drew that's not a leopard silly it's just leopard print, it's in right now," she says making us laugh. Fashionista.

"Well Spence, I have to get back to studying," Nathan says. I smile as she blows him a kiss.

"Bee call me later," he says. I nod and blow him a kiss too. After we hang up I have Spencer and Drew on my bed.

"Pizza," my mom calls up the stairs.

"Let's go guys," I say. I pick up Drew and take Spencer's hand. We walk downstairs and eat pizza.

The rest of the night is spent hanging out and having lots of sweet talks. This is really feeling like summer.