Kanda couldn't decide which he wanted to do, so he phrased it as a hypothetical question to try to gauge Allen's reactions. "And what are you going to do if Central won't let us get divorced?"

Allen simply shrugged at the question Kanda thought would freak him out. He had thought this through completely before he ever suggested any of it. "I don't know. But it's the only possible way out of this, so it's what I have to hope for."

Kanda's gut reaction was to get angry over how desperately the Moyashi wanted to get out of marrying him, but at the same time, he knew that if he wanted Allen to return his feelings someday soon, he was going to have to be patient with him. And once he pushed aside the urge to yell, he was able to actually take in the look of bitterness on the Moyashi's face. "Damn. You're adorable even when you're rejecting me."

Allen blinked in confusion. Even after almost a week, he still couldn't believe that Kanda was attracted to him, but that wasn't his main problem with the statement. "I'm not rejecting you. In fact, I've said several times now that I'll marry you, so wh-?"

Kanda sighed and adjusted his hold on the body in his arms, freeing up his hand so that he could tangle it into Allen's soft, white hair and make the brat look at him. "You followed it up with saying that you plan to divorce me the first chance you get. That's a rejection, Moyashi."

Allen frowned and tried, unsuccessfully, to escape from Kanda's embrace. He wished the samurai would stop touching him like that, but he also knew that actually trying to make him stop doing it would only make him do it more often. "Don't take it personally, Bakanda. None of this has anything to do with you."

That made Kanda snort in derision. "I'm the person you're marrying, Allen. This has everything to do with me. Or have you already forgotten that our marriage is what I want?"

"Of course not! You won't let me forget!" Allen really wished that he could forget that Kanda wanted to be in a relationship with him, but even without Kanda's constant reminders, his pregnancy made that impossible. And that only made him more frustrated with their current conversation. "But what about what I want?! Why should your desires matter more than mine?!"

While Kanda didn't like how genuinely upset Allen sounded, the Moyashi was being honest about his feelings for a change, so he decided to argue back rather than try to calm him down. "Because you're the one who wants to kill our unborn child. You're scared and confused, and you're not thinking clearly. I-"

"Would you stop throwing that in my face?!" Allen tried to hold them in, but the angry tears streamed down his face anyway; he hated how emotional his pregnancy was making him. "Every time I say something that you disagree with, you invalidate my opinion because I want an abortion. You make me feel like less of a person, and I've frankly had more than my fair share of that! If you really love me like you claim, you wouldn't be putting me down like that!"

Allen was not expecting Kanda to respond to his outburst by kissing him, but that was exactly what the samurai did. Kanda leaned in and silenced the Moyashi the only way he knew how; he still desperately wished Allen would return his kisses, but for now, it was good enough that the kissing made the brat shut up. "I was only saying it to press your buttons and get you to be honest with me."

The explanation made no sense to Allen. He knew that Kanda liked to intentionally piss him off, but he could usually tell when the samurai was doing that, yet he hadn't even sort of picked up on it this time. He waited for Kanda to explain further, but it quickly became clear that Kanda was waiting for him to say something first. "I don't understand."

Kanda sighed and tousled the Moyashi's hair; the brat was being both adorable and annoying, and that was trying his patience. "I don't think less of you for wanting an abortion, I'm disappointed in you. You have the biggest heart of everyone I know, but you can't love your own child, and that's something that I just can't wrap my head around. It's honestly weirder to me that you don't want the baby than it is that you're pregnant. So I've been pushing it to try to get you to realize that you're being stupid, but if all it's doing is making you feel inferior, it's clearly not working. So let's drop this and change the subject."

Allen was momentarily frozen in shock. What Kanda had just said to him could only be interpreted as an apology, yet Kanda never apologized. For anything. And it was especially weird that the samurai would apologize for hurting his feelings. Collecting himself, Allen managed to stammer out a response, though he almost wished that Kanda would continue to explain why he was acting the way he had been. "Did you have something in mind?"

Kanda shrugged nonchalantly, though inwardly he was praying that this wouldn't start another argument. "Whose room are we going to share?"

The blank way Allen stared at him told him that he didn't understand the question, and Kanda was both annoyed by his cluelessness and aroused by how adorable the confused Moyashi looked. "If we're married, we have to live together, so...?"

Kanda let the question trail off when the confusion faded from Allen's expression. After a moment of thought, the Moyashi spoke. "Yours, I guess. It's bigger and in a more private location than mine."

Allen knew better than to say that he didn't want them to live together. For starters, Kanda undoubtedly already knew that, but Allen also knew that saying it out loud wouldn't make him feel better. He had no choice but to live with Kanda while they were married, and even if they did get divorced, they would probably still have to live together for the child's sake. "Though if you think that I'm going to completely give up my room, you've-"

Kanda cut him off with a kiss, knowing exactly where he was going with the challenge. "No. I know that you need time. And your own private space. I just wanted to know where we'd be sleeping so that we'll have an answer for Komui when he asks."

Allen frowned in embarrassment, burying his face in Kanda's chest and returning one of the samurai's embraces for the first time. He felt incredibly stupid for what he had almost said, but the way Kanda was holding him made him feel safe and secure. "Right. You of all people understand what it's like to need time alone. Are you ever going to tell anyone where you disappear to when Lavi's pestering you?"

The joke made Kanda laugh a little, and even though he knew the question was rhetorical and Allen didn't actually expect an answer from him, he did so anyway. "Maybe. ...Someday. But you'll have to change your mind about divorcing me before that can ever happen."

.x.x.

Allen and Kanda spent the next day in silence, but despite never speaking a single word to each other, they never left the other's side. The fact that they would be married before the day was over scared both of them, and knowing that they weren't alone gave them comfort, but they were aware that they were scared for very different reasons, so they didn't try to talk about it, knowing that it would only start another fight and make them both feel worse. It was enough to simply be in each other's presence.

When the time came, they went both quickly and reluctantly to Komui's office, apprehensive yet ready to get it over with and put an end to the tension they'd been feeling all day. Of course, the first thing Komui did was try once again to start a conversation with them about their feelings, which was annoying in and of itself, but Reever was present to be the witness to their wedding, and they had to explain to him why they were getting married, and it turned out that telling someone that they were expecting a baby was not something either young man was ready to do yet.

But once Komui got the hint that they didn't want to talk, he went straight to business. Less than five minutes later, Allen and Kanda had repeated the traditional wedding vows and signed their marriage license. Exchanging rings was a little more difficult, as Allen balked at the idea of wearing something that declared to the world that he was married, but the ease and confidence with which Kanda wore his own ring distracted him from his feelings.

When their shotgun wedding was over, Allen and Kanda walked hand in hand up to Allen's bedroom. Allen didn't particularly want to be holding hands with Kanda in public - or at all - but when Kanda had taken his left hand, he found that he couldn't pull away. The samurai's strong hold pressed his new ring uncomfortably into his finger, reminding him of the fact that they were married now, but at the same time, the grasp was warm and comforting, and it made him feel wanted. His life had been spiraling out of control lately, but at least his forced marriage was to someone who wanted to be with him.

Upon reaching Allen's room, the pair began packing up his things to start the move into sharing a room. They only grabbed the necessities - the things Allen would need while they lived in Kanda's room, as the rest could wait until Komui had finished preparing their new room. It didn't take very long, since Allen had always been a minimalist when it came to possessions, and once it was done, they took the things down to Kanda's room in the generals' wing.

It took even less time to unpack the things that they had just packed up, and though it was still early, they decided it was time to turn in for the night. It had been a long, emotionally tense day, and they both needed sleep.

Allen had relaxed once their wedding was over, but as they moved to climb into bed together, all of his stress and anxiety returned. He had thoroughly analyzed the situation and decided that it was best to obey the rules and marry Kanda, but he had overlooked one important thing, which he suddenly discovered in that moment: this was their wedding night. He was going to have to have sex with Kanda tonight, to fulfill their marriage contract and consummate the relationship, yet he could barely tolerate having the samurai hold his hand. Letting Kanda have his body was going to be incredibly unpleasant, but he had no choice. Besides, his body had already been defiled and impregnated; no one other than Kanda was ever going to want it, so he may as well give it to him, even if his own heart wasn't in it.

Contrary to his expectations, Kanda merely kissed him once before rolling back to his side of the bed to go to sleep. The action severely confused Allen; it was surprising and baffling that the samurai hadn't even tried to touch him. "That's it? You're not going to...?"

Kanda raised an eyebrow at the unfinished question. He knew exactly what the Moyashi was trying to ask, but he couldn't figure out why he was asking about that. It was glaringly obvious to him that Allen wasn't ready for sex. "Do you want me to?"

Allen briefly debated lying, but Kanda always seemed to know when he did that, so he decided to be honest. "No, but-"

Kanda didn't need to hear what followed that, so he was quick to interrupt. "I'm not going to rape you, Allen."

The way the Moyashi's silver eyes widened with shock was adorable. Kanda leaned in and kissed his forehead before tousling his hair. "Sex can wait until you're ready for it."

The statement made Allen feel both better and worse. "And if I'm never ready?"

Kanda laughed at that. "That's not going to happen. It won't be long at all before your pregnancy hormones kick in and you become so horny that you're willing to let anything with a pulse fuck you. And that's when I'll step in."

Allen kicked him in the shin, which was the exact reaction Kanda had been expecting his joke to get. He kissed Allen briefly as he turned serious. "You're not the type to cheat, Moyashi. You may not want to be married to me, but you respect the rules enough that you're not going to have an affair. So when you decide you want sex, I'm who you'll come to. I don't know how long that's going to take, but I'm willing to wait."

It was starting to piss Allen off how kind and considerate Kanda had become over the last week; his behavior had to be a trick of some kind, and Allen was pretty certain that sex was the end goal of that trick. "But you have needs. Are you-?"

Kanda didn't want to know what the rest of that question was. "You were my first too, Moyashi. You are the only person I want to have sex with, so I'm not going to cheat on you. And since you seem to be having trouble getting this through your thick skull, I'll say it again: I'm not going to rape you. I want you to want to sleep with me."